Sex! - Do you have Asperger's Syndrome? 

Hi! I'm a 48 year old guy and had an Asperger's diagnostic three months ago. I have a wife, a son, a real good and profitable job, but I have suffered all my life trying to behave just as someone normal. I have been watching your videos and realised my feelings, thoughts are amazingly close as yours. You were so brave talking about sex, a real taboo. Please, keep on producing your videos; as it happened to me, you are really able to help people with asperger's, including avoiding them thinking they are freaks in earth.

I am one of those creepy girls who is trying to understand an aspie I am dating. Thank you for this comment, "Just because we don't touch people that much because we sometimes try not to touch people that much doesn't mean we don't like getting touched." It really spoke to me. I am not actually creepy. I just want to learn to read him a bit better. Thank you.

.... we split up house hold chores, etc. As with everything else in an Aspie / NT marriage, sex is normal with a hint Aspie flavor. My hubby avoids eye contact during sex and sticks to a set algorithm (like a lot of men). Communication in the bedroom is something that you have to learn as in all relationships... the Aspie factor makes it slightly more challenging but still doable. Over all, I have no complaints. Hubby is extremely romantic and a genius in more ways than one! Sex is GOOD.

That was interesting; especially as I've been in a couple of relationships with people with Aspergers or Autism Spectrum Disorder. It was especially interesting when you described not being able to not mention something that you see that you consider arousing and the way you speak of different aspects of sex and relationships in such a compartmentalised manner. In my experience, aspies in relationships are a bit like a clogged bottle of ketchup: all the emotions are there but they seem to come out in unpredictable spurts (a bad analogy, considering the nature of the video). Also, having to deal with another person's unpredictable emotions seems very draining so there's this paradoxical aspect of wanting to be close without wanting to deal with the constant noise of someone else in your space.

Thank you, thank you, thank you... I just can't say it enough. I'm seeing someone who has AS. This is th most vital video I've seen so far. Thank you for sharing such personal information. It has made a huge difference in my view of Aspies. I needed to understand this stuff.

I enjoyed this video a lot. Having been diagnosed with asperger syndrome only about 3 years ago it suddenly gave me a whole new perspective on who I am. I have always had a huge problem with being close to people. Both physically close but also intimately close. I had big problems taking public transportation and just big groups of people (causing me to quit University). After at an age of 25 meeting a woman that I got to know online - and got to talk about ME - and how I felt inside I figured out that it was not the intimacy or closeness - my fear was that people realised at what level it affected me. My brain normally race with a million thoughts at the same time - but suddenly when I get near people - especially when being intimate - my brain partly goes into overload. During sex is the only time when I am "there" in the now. For me it is very liberating - but it unfortunately also caused that I tend to seek sexuality in all aspects of life. So for me - sex mean a moment of just being, of not worrying about anything, of just not that pleasure in the moment. Like you say - I do not only think of sex - but it sure takes a lot of my emotional energy, also because I am in a situation where I can not share my sexuality.

There are no bad words, there ar just words. Words aren't inherently bad.

You are terrific and I really appreciate your ability to be open, honest and talk about your Aspergers and your sexuality. I love a man with Aspergers but had to leave him because he didn't (couldn't?) acknowledge that he even has Aspergers...(yes, I still "love" him). (Important Disclaimer: it was never my objective to analyse, change, or "diagnose" him; however, after 2.5 years with him, everything I didn't understand about him (that also made Me personally feel like I was disappearing) came full circle and pointed to Aspergers). Problem is, I believe he always expected me to leave; and I always expected to stay (and be his partner as we continued to learn and cared for each other more deeply (trust too). Anyway thank you for sharing.

"...if she tries to hug me I literally push her away until she falls over..." OK, that cracked me up. I'm not a big fan of random hugs either. The length of time one should actually hug *for* always concerns me. A nanosecond? A minute? Two days with a break for a nap? I have no clue.

My Aspie hubby of 7 years has a very healthy sexual appetite. Generally speaking, he doesn't like physical contact but I am the exception. As his wife, I am the ONLY person who can touch him without making him uncomfortable. He can't keep his hands off of me... it's almost a compulsion; like a child with a favorite doll. For anyone who is wondering what sex with an Aspie would be like, it's almost normal. We go through the same struggles as any other married couple. We fight about money....

Thanks for this video. I'm an Aspie Girl.. I actually just got diagnosed at the age of 27. And it's really helpful to listen to other Aspies describe their feelings and thoughts. It helps to identify similar traits that I have. I agree that I'm not a touchy person, but that doesn't mean I don't want to be touched by someone I like.

I love how the topic is about sex and you are dressed up nicely haha

Hello InjuredMinds. I had just stumbled on your page while I searching for solutions to interact with an aspie. You had been uploading vids for quite some time now and I found it delightful that your page was a goldmine of information and/or inputs for AS (yeh, I am THIS late, but pffft.....). Anyway, I had to admit that I searched for answers on books, experts and even the darn Google but their information seemed lacking due to my insatiable appetite to know the side of an aspie. Then, your channel provided me with answers. I don't mean to sound like I am kissing your ass (figuratively speaking, ofc) but I thank you for being THAT catalyst - for bridging the gap between NT and AS. As for the topic, it is quite refreshing to hear aspie's (or should I say, yours?) sentiments about sex. I've got to say that your vlog is delightful in a sense that it is quite tongue-in-cheek. Needles to say, of all the subtopics you shared for almost 22 minutes, the masturbation part truly cracked me up (in a good way. Please don't take it as an offense). I believe it is just natural. After all, 95% of the male population masturbates, while the other 5% are liars. For women, 50% admitted to masturbate, while the remaining 50% lost half of their lives (booooo, I've just made that up). I think I had typed way too much. But let me ask, since you bear your soul and insights while making your vlog, do you often feel the need to cavein after doing it?

The text comments you add to your videos are very funny ^^ I´ve been watching some of your other videos. I don´t think I have Aspergers because "I´m impulsive" and "I sympathize with emotions naturally" etc but I share some of your views on things, specially the socializing experiences .. I may be not aware of it all the time, but most of the times I seek solitude as well. :)

Thank you from the bottom of my heart...

Wow sir, you are very interesting and entertaining while being informative. I also know from my own experience as an aspergian that your information is very applicable to our lives. I hope you continue to create this fantastic videos

Also I have a girlfriend in a different country.

I really appreciate this video, I just yesterday after 3 years of suspicion and research ordered to local autistic spectrum disorder center to get diagnose, but I am very much sure of having an aspergers syndrome.But my sexuality was on of the reasons why I still doubt it and there is really not much on the internet about Aspies and sex.I don't think that u sound pervert in the video or something actually I pretty much have same feelings about the topic.I start do research about sex at very young age to understand stupid jokes of my classmates and kinda get to know what "creepy things" is awaiting me when my body is ready for it, but I had no sexual interest at all till first physical contact when I found out that my hypersensitivity ( mostly to touch and smells) is also tied to my sexuality and I kinda freak out as I was 15 when I get first kiss which for that was kinda late but for me definitely too early for sex but I had 0 control over myself.It took my 2 years to keep that under control but I definitely like sex and kinda like to talk about it, I think its normal and nice but I have to feel something to person I make it with - if not I'm not even able to let myself being touched or seen naked.Btw you are really funny and has nice voice- thats real plus because people that doesn't makes me bored and sleepy but if your video would be twice as long my attention will still be awake :D

You could actually do a series on this topic if you wanted to. There are so many different aspects involved, especially aspie-related. You wouldn't really have to go into detail about "the act" if you plan out how to phrase certain things to be generalized enough. Very true about not wanting any physical contact with anybody unless you are emotionally close to them. With NTs, it seems to happen the other way around, which can be a real roadblock for developing a romantic relationship.

i reckon you have a bridge between us and them i know when i smoke weed i notice things that i am doing wrong like in social situations but in this video i felt you were talking to me and me only many thanks

I dont have zits... but I have really bad, obvious bone deformations like my whole left side of my rib cage is mess up, and my collar bone. I can never stop thinking about it when i take my clothes off.

I love that you're so hilarious, yet informative.

I'm 36 and still a big V, I have aspergers and it just don't happen for me whys that?

Thanks that you made this. It did open little of my eyes as my aspie side and sexuality.

You are hilarious man! Thanks for the videos. You probably get that a lot, but I never thought aspies can have a sense of humor.

You made me laugh several times. Thank you :)

Sex for me is like a drug, once ive had sex, i end up hoping i can get it again and then i end up wanting it again several hours later. i remember going through that when i was 15, and im guessing it was probably because of a side effect from an anitdepressant i was taking back then which was called lexapro. but i didnt know aspergers had a behavioral trait that resembled nymphomania or promiscuity

can you cover the concept of an aspie not coming out as an aspie until marriage proposal and how unfair it is for non sex aspie to marry high libido NT

I am glad you made this video! I have no problem with the ACT of Sex! I have a problem expressing myself especially sexually! This is a problem for me when I am in a long term relationships. I do not show my affections is the "Normal" way ie sex!

Could you make a video about bullying? Were you bullied at school?

Thanks, I really enyoyed it. We can see your struggles.

@InjuredMinds Good luck with the getting to see Katarina. I know from experience that it's very important ;). (Actually, just moved to Sverige to be with my man.) It would be cool if you could do a video on *cultural things to think about when moving to Sweden. There's a group of English speaking people moving to Sweden that would likely find it pretty interesting, but it's not a let's play or an Aspie video tho. Has Kat thought about doing school over here? I think it helped for my visa.

I am okay with your honesty. You are very unique guy that is honest. I agree with your talk. I actually rarely think and talk bout sex.

Woo, you look just like me when I was young on that photo of you when you were young. I also had a strong hair going in all directions on its own. Amazing :)

But, is it true (like he says) that you want to be touched? It's simply that initial approach or contact?

Good Sir, Surely you jest ? My girlfriend watched this, She is not creepy. I think getting some insight on dating someone is AS would be a primary reason to watch this video. Hell, I think she probably watching more AS videos then I do.

and made quite a bit of racket, the kind that bug your neighbors enough to where the police are likely to show up at your doorstep. but the thing about her that makes me uncomfortable is that shes noticeably clingy and when i want to go see a friend of mine she always has to come with me. how do i tell her that what shes doing is uncomfortable and how do i tell her to stop and in a way she'll understand?

Im actually asexual :P I have Aspergers too and dont want to be touched in any way and i dont feel the need to have sex

i care about my relationship with my current girlfriend, but sometimes i wonder whether or not i shouldve said yes to her when she asked me out in a text message a couple months ago. my girlfriend is bi-polar and sometimes acts childish and awkward from time to time. she also calls me at least 7-9 times a day even during times i tell her not to call me. one thing i do like is that shes a bit of a nymphomaniac and likes sex alot, the 1st week we dated we had sex at least 12 times.......

I could go for eternity without being touched, and other people have a hard time with that. Thanks for putting this out. It helps.

Where are you from? I'm trying to figure out the accent, It sounds like a mix of Scottish, and New Zealand to me.

@InjuredMinds Yay for you and Cat and learning languages! If you or Cat (or anyone else) has any Qs on my experience, etc. I'd be happy to answer them. I've done pretty much all the basics of moving now except got a job. :) And before I forget, great video too! Being open is one thing, posting a positive video like this on youtube takes extra bravery and/or dedication. Very nice!

I like your honesty, nice vids!

I have Asperger's syndrome, and I can't be next to a person (girlfriend) for more than an hour, i need help, i think im gonna be alone the rest of my life, that's why i never had a girlfriend, also i can't have any interest in another person, when i meet a girl I can't go any further from "hi".

i have the same facial hair. patches in the same place (unless you shape it). illuminati confirmed.

Are aspergers or ASD people hypersexual sometimes or sex addicted? Can someone answer this? Like possibly OCD about sex?

I trust you more than my sex ed teacher in middle school. I graduated 4-5 yrs ago tho. Regardless, thx for the courage to make this video... Being somewhere on the spectrum myself. 👍

Just wanna point out a thing about aspies and sex. The sensitivity on can go both ways. Aspies ither dont like very light touch but likes hard touch. Or the opposite. Its ilogical to none aspies but good to know and can help alot to pay attention to .

I think the honesty part about the sex is great in the long run... even if it's a bit creepy at times... atleast the girls who show interest are clear on your likes and needs.

Dont be too disheartened if you dont get it.

he is from sweden

i admire that u can speak so honestly without feeling embarrassed or anything but such a taboo subject... as for catrina... WTF are u waiting for!!! u have one life and it can end at any second! psh! btw.. u didn't look so freaky as a kid.. =.] great vid!!! do another! again again again! =]

I was told I may have PTSD and have started seeing a therapist and was told I may have aspergers. I just started researching and watching vid's on it and have been seeing that those with aspergers dont typically like touching and sex and stuff but I am lovey dovey and like touch and sex and think one night stands are ok between to consenting adults. Does this mean I dont have aspergers or does that not exclude me or what?

I like what you were saying about people thinking you always think about sex because you mention it a lot.. I have an interest in psychoactive molocule a and how they effect the brain and talk about it a lot sometimes almost at random. People think I'm a druggie or something sometimes

like the vest! where are you from, are you Irish?

My bf has AS and I'm a NT. We are close, but no cigar, and that's all right. I know it's a hard relationship in that area, and in others. But we have strong feelings for each other and care for each other, so I am just as happy how it is. Then again, I've never tasted that candy, so... Oh! And you are so cute! Good luck with your gf!

You have fangirls, lol. And it's cool seeing you not behind a desk. Nice change of pace.

I wanna say in the head thing isnt true at all, thats a personality thing. Because working out almost always involves other people when your younger it can be hard to get into. I used to love track, people always made fun of the way I run though. I looked like a robot, I got the nick name T-1000. Having autism/aspergers does not make you automatically bad at coordination or sports, it just has to be practiced like anything else. Video games has done wonders for my muscle memory, typing, and hand eye coordination in general. So has martial arts. I no longer punch people if they touch me from behind because of that, so thats good.

brain vomit machine??? Oh my goodness

@InjuredMinds typical you... sadly even if you would i have no way to donate anyways.. oh and could you please make a video explaining what the youtube partnership means?

do my parents say I need a GF? yes, but like you thats when we aspies get crazy emotional because we know the chance of that is very small

Congratulations on the partnership!

Danke

Congrats on the partnership! :)

Grats to the partnership!! :D

I'm asexual. Because I have Aspergers? Idk. But this was a weird thing for me for a long time

have to say he is right, sex is far more healthy than unhealthy and same thing for masturbating, most people only do that because they dont have anyone

I love your videos. They make me giggle. I can so relate. :)

I'm 22 and never had sex. I couldn't form an intimate relationship to save my life. :/ I don't think I'm an aspie though. Whatever. -_-

I have Aspergers (ASD level 1) and I actually really like touch and sex. I could never do a long distance relationship. I am picky about who I like as not many people like me either. But once I find someone compatible, it’s great. I’m not a naturally affectionate person and just don’t know what other people want. But when you find someone you trust who understands what you like and will tell you what they like, that’s the best case scenario. I find that being with others on the spectrum also is more fun in bed 🤓. We tend to be very honest about what we’re into and will be more open to explore new things than most neurotypicals.

a streetcar named asperger.

very uncomfortable because I would like to have a conversation with you right now. But ill say thanks for making the video

What am wondering is the act . I have been in three times in my 53 years old age are asperger people so ( Hum ) got to left feet . so to speak. The last one was a one night stand as you put it . I wish girl would hit me up.

Swe?

I respect that sex is necessary to your well-being, but that's not necessarily the case for everyone. I know asexuals who don't even have the drive to masturbate, much less have sex.

To me sometimes it seems like the only way to express my love... Lol

It's funny how you always say females instead of girls

What am wondering is the act . I have been in three times in my 53 years old age are asperger people so ( Hum ) got to left feet . so to speak. The last one was a one night stand as you put it . I wish girl would hit me up. Wired that me . However am no freak now.

..I would list all the times i laughed my ass off in this video, but i don't think i would have enough characters. So i'll just do one. "It is very tasty."

Grats on Partner, you deserve it

Guys, just move to Finnland. Nobody will tell the difference.

I love this video, thanx for the vid.

Thank you so very very much for this video :)

Anyways this was adorable and painfully awkward

Are you afraid of sex? It's a normal thing and I do have Aspergers Syndrome. I did snap out of it really... I got trained and hang out with normal people. Girls are hot man there is nothing wrong?..

@InjuredMinds also i has added you on skype sir.

This guy is a player.

you have an accent, where is it from?

haha reminds me the first time I pointed out a girls thong was showing, I tried telling her to be nice about it because I thought it might be embarrassing for her... that conversation did not turn out well for me. At all. Im typing too much now sry, flooding the channel

Want more definitely!!!!

come on linus random hugs are the best :D also i never lie eather and i hate it when people do also i think we as viewers should all donate to you for a ticket to protugal :D

Don't worry, I'm not a stalker. I just mentioned that if I were, you'd be my first "victim". But I'm not. And you're younger than my daughter. That would just be creepy. :)

interesting accent (not meant insultingly.. just unique to me) i've never said this to anybody i know.. online or otherwise.. so even if this is ignored it's fine but atleast i can tell myself that i said it semi publically my "quirks" on the subject is with physical contact. if its not with somebody that i want to have sex with (which is rare that i might even like somebody to that point) then i dont even want to shake their hand let alone anything else. and as a blurb (typing as i listen) i did not masturbate until after i had sex (only been with 1 person.. about 10yrs ago... never been on a date. it was my 1st girlfriend, we met online.. blah blah whatever. it lasted a bit less than 1 year) but anyway... i don't have the whole "dating" thing in my brain.. it just doesn't exist, it's not even a step. i go from an acquaintance (somebody i might like seeing occasionally, maybe go somewhere now and then but no real deep conversations) straight into a marriage mindset (i don't even believe in marriage.. but the concept of staying with that 1 person for the rest of my life. usually it will be sparked by a few similarities. so if we have a couple similar interests and she's also shy that's about all it can take) but that's just the mindset part. i also have this whole screwy set of rules i created around 6th grade. simply put (although this can't happen now, so i do try to bend enough for equality but i've never met anybody with my "lack" of experience even close to my age... 31 by the way) basically i want to be with 1 person my whole life.. do nothing before them so everything we did from a simple hug to having sex would be that much more special and memorable to me (and because the thought of people doing anything with other people outside of that mindset basically disgusts me. on any level... whether i'm talking about 2 people having sex or just somebody hugging a friend they are excited to see.. remember, i was like 12 when i made these rules, so girls hugged their friends a lot)

LOL BRAIN VOMIT MACHINE

YES!

YAY! YOUR A PARTNER NOW! now i can offically become a linus fangirl! btw why dont you talk on facebook dude?

hi i have recently been diagnosed with as very good video you have beautiful eyes

This is awesome

@soulhunterrx i knooooow.. only kidding!! =]]]

21:08 looks good!