If you’re separated from your spouse, and there's not an affair going on, you may be wondering, “Should I make love to my spouse, or not?” Check out this conversation with Dr. Joe Beam and Kimberly Holmes as they discuss the pros, the cons, and specific things you should think through before making a decision.
Be sure to watch this other video referenced by Dr. Joe Beam on this topic!
“Should I Make Love With My Spouse During An Affair?” • Should I Make Love Wit...
Though this video is more affair-specific, it also includes helpful things to consider in making your decision whether or not to be intimate with your spouse.
According to Dr. Joe Beam and Kimberly Holmes some of the pros include individual, health benefits, relationship benefits, and belief/value system benefits. Some of the cons include overanalyzing the situation, feeling resentment, thinking that doing so will bring your spouse back- which it could, but it’s not necessarily a likelihood.
So, how does a person decide? Well, when it really comes down to it, you have to decide for yourself. You can even list out (on a scale of 1-10) each pro and each con and comparing your findings. Ask yourself, “What is most important to me?”
And no matter what you decide, please don’t beat yourself up about your decision. You'll tear yourself apart if you start doing that kind of thing. Instead, you can use what you feel afterward to decide whether you want make the same decision again if the opportunity comes up again.
With everything we talk about at Marriage Helper, it's always up to the individual. There are no hard and fast rules. Instead, we ask that you evaluate and think about all the different options/things to consider to make your own decision, and trust yourself after you make the decision.
Remember, relationships are always complex. They're not black and white, and you really have to think to make things work. And know that we are here to help! We have Coaches who can help you think things through.
For more information about coaching, visit: marriagehelper.com/coaching
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18 окт 2020
