Same here, and most videos on youtube about social anxiety seems to be just bullshit. Pretty girls talking about problems they can't grasp the concept of, and then get 100ks of views. Then there's real video like this one talking about actual stuff, but not much views. Fk this bullshit man. This will never change.
I had that social anxiety since i was in highschool and now even getting worst since i lost both of my parents. Just hate to be arround people, be seen, hear peoples voice. I am talented and smart. But too bad i am sinking into a darkness and loneliness. Still trying to find the coping mechanism to get out from this hell.
My God..that's what exactly I do usually.. Scared of neighbours..hiding from them..avoiding them..scared of ppl...Dnt wanna go outside.. M depressed..Dnt wanna interact them.. Living isolated..
@Suyog Khatri things are going to be alright if you stop thinking about such things(negative). Think something productive and get involved in that.. And try to enjoy your isolation it's not wrong. Staying with your self is the best thing and it's protect you.
I often fantasize of how awesome my life would be without social anxiety/agoraphobia. I think of how amazing it would be to casually and comfortably carry a conversation with a stranger at a grocery store. Side note: someone just tested me in a group chat. I am so curious, but also afraid. Why involve me?
My anxiety is different I can't talk to guys that I have just met And I never had a boyfriend I never went on dates and it's affecting me Just imagine this your fiance wants to take you to a fancy restaurant for a date but you are terrified to go because you can't talk to people
I never even got my license Never been employed I'm living with family and some times it's hard to get out of bed I went maybe. 4 years without getting sun but went 10 years not doing anything but gaming.. I try to sink my sorrow by pretend ing I go inside of these games I'm 30 now I need a friend I can actually hang with but every one online think I'm weird I guess I don't blame em Trying to talk on a phone is so hard..... I probably shouldn't have been born
U r not weird...man..is only what u think about yourself that keeps u in it home..believe me I met ,,weird" people and ,,cool" people ...only thing that makes us weird for the others is that the cool guys get a lot out of the house,and they re learning more things or has another hobbyes..we all have this insecurities cause that makes us better in time but thinking ur weird and do nothing before trying to get a friend is like saying I'm ugly at a miss or mister universe ..some will say he weird some will find something cool at u..and so on..thats life...Try and make a friend believe me ,u will see that im right and dont make presumptions before u try to make friends.Try to find gamers cause 10 years of gaming is something pretty cool for gamers I thin..look at pewdiepie on RU-vid has 15 mil views from gaming..so u might get more friends than u even.realise.As a advice don t get urself intimidated or sad cause people says ur weird that happens since Ice age cause we don't share the same likenesses.So good luck and try,try and try some more and don t get demoralised cause is better to have no friends that bad friends believe me
I know this video is old but I totally feel for you. I used to have very bad social anxiety (not as bad as you though, still went outside and such) and it was hard for me to do things that involved socializing. I get embarrassed eating or even looking into the mirror in front of people. The only way to "cure" it is to force yourself to get out of your comfort zone no matter how bad it makes you feel! You will gradually get used to it and feel comfortable around people. I'm getting a job that involves a lot of socializing, wish me luck!
Im indonesian,,,when i go to outside people says im idiot cause im ugly,they attention on me makeme panic,scared,and only home no 1. secure place on earth...
It is like you're describing my life,from the secrecy towards others, and the avoidance of the outside world. Tortured by ambitions that are unable to obtain in this situation, or tortured by my perception of the outside world. Sometimes sounds of others affect me so much as well. Thank you for having the courage to share this, by being honest I recognize so much. Thank you.
Finally I've found someone who left jobs because of anxiety too, I left two jobs because of my anxiety and not fitting in, other people esp family just don't know how bad it eats you up inside being the socially awkward guy at work, also one of those jobs was at my father's work which was pretty high end job too but again I couldn't fit in.
I'm scared to get a job cus of my anxiety,I always quit,cus I start freaking out,I don't like being in a car or going to the store and I don't want to go outside ,I hide inside because I feel safe.when I'm out in public I freak out,I get dizzy and I feel like I'm not myself.
Yeah the way i deal with it is i always say to myself that this is how i was made, we all want to be better but you got to accept it and try to live, it's like if you aren't very tall it's stupid to spend your life crying over not being tall, you just move on, no matter how bad it is, social anxiety is different, some people have it worse than others, and we got to accept that, if i gonna cry over it, i will cry over not doing a lot of things in life, but you got to just let it go, when you feel awkard the one thing you can do isn't feel sad about it, you just got to understand that you shouldn't feel sad about something that you can't control. peace man, hope this helps.
This video helped me go to the store. I know it might sound dumb but I struggle myself so just thank you for sharing it actually helps alot of people like me out.
I have just shown your video to my Son as he is really struggling to go out and hasn't left the house for months. He told me that this is exactly how he feels. Thank you. I can now get some help for him now I know what we are dealing with. Well done for doing this video. You will help lots of people get their head around this and realise people are not alone.
This illness truly sucks. I mean this in the best way possible but I'm glad I'm not alone feeling like this and neither are you man. I don't even know how it happened either but yeah I can't stand being seen either. The worst part is I know its irrational but it doesn't make any difference. If anyone can point me in the right direction to get better it would be appreciated beyond belief.
I think recovery begins with not punishing yourself for being different. Self kindness may do wonders towards social anxiety because we tend to be very hard on ourselves for not having many (if at all) friends, experiences or interests as other people. Obviously if we want our depression to lift, we need to face our fear and be with people . If anyone thinks they can improve social anxiety while still avoiding people you re severally mistaken. Above all is to have unconditional love for yourself regardless of whether you think you did well or not in a social situation. The more you beat yourself up over encounters the more terrifying these situations will be to you. (Exposure therapy in such cases makes it worse). Accept that you are different and seek people that will love you despite you being different. (I’m not saying different = you’re a loser. Social anxiety sufferers tend to be the most compassionate and empathetic people in society. I think the world could use more of that)
I Do and think the same stuff that you mentioned. Im in my 49 and its just gotten worse, so I commend you on your efforts to battle your social anxiety. Its a never ending battle unfortunately, but you seem to be much braver than I am. Hope to keep hearing about your efforts.
I have a lot of the same reactions that you do. Many times when I go out my hands shake so bad I just want to turn around and run back inside. I just have anxiety over everything....dogs off leash, bees, people in general. I feel like it's driving me insane.
Yesss, hands shake, body gets tensed ASF, looking like a nervous crack head😩 so embarrassing, i will stay in my house foreverrrr until this is gone for good, im done with this embarrassing shit🤬😒😖
I don’t know if I have anxiety or not but lately sometimes whenever someone tell Let’s go outside I feel nervous and anxious the whole time. I wasn’t like this before I dont Know what happened to me. I suddenly became like this I’m slowly losing interest in everything family gatherings friends work 😫.
Im 17 now and I’m 3-4 years inside my house, because I can’t go outside. Doesn’t help that my suicide attempt didn’t work, so only thing is waiting until this shit ends or ending my life again. Im Just so down, I was good in school and had plans and now everything is destroyed or atleast I don’t have any motivation to be that Hollywood hero rising up again or smth from their destroyed life and making it work again. I hate this so much
I’m 30 this year and I’ve never experienced having a job.. I can’t even do interviews, its super hard for me to go outside alone, haven’t uploaded a picture of me for years and I live in a very judgmental country.. I also stop taking care of myself coz I feel that It’s not worth it coz I just want to end everything for me but at the same time I want to enjoy life and live a different kind of living.. it’s so hard being alive..
i'm living where i was born even then i am afraid of going out of my home i don't know what caused it but now i'm scared of going out because i am afraid that people will think was i living under the rock for a decade,now whenever i go out people don't recognise me and say that they have never seen me around how the hell can i deal with such a situation man
If they say something like ! Wow who are you? I've never seen you around....you can say this: none of your business you asshole !! Go fuck yourself piece of shit. That totally works :)
I know how you feel, I secretly skip school because I have anxiety. I sometimes stay in the school bathroom because I can’t go to the class. Anxiety controls me
I don't post anything online because I get anxious, so I don't have any online friends. I don't have any friends in real life too. Even posting this comment took me nearly 10 minutes checking for errors and stuff. English is not my mother tongue, so I worry if people would think this comment sounds weird. Then I worry somemore for the next 2 hours, checking to see if anybody saw my comment and what they would say. Would they say I'm dumb? Somtimes I get so anxious that smoking, dying or vomiting seems to be the only options left. Entire days get wasted like this. I hate my life. I wish I did not exist.
I got on RU-vid because I wanted to research this agoraphobia thing which is keeping me prisoner in my own house, and I was feeling suicidal but your video made me laugh...you are a cool person and the fact that you make videos is awesome...you be alright man...I'm going back to Poland in about 3 weeks and I'm going through hell right now, if it wasn't for xanax I would be dead already
You are totally understood and make people feel they are not alone when you post such videos. I relate entirely to all that you say. I wish you all the very best.
I hope u get over the phobia soon.I also have the same problem but,well you had the courage to leave yours parents house ,work and make your life.I still live in the same house with parents i dont work no friends and iam 35 years
Hi man, takis trakis !! Are you still in your parents house? Same problem but I just turned 23 last week....I just don't wanna end up like that but can't fit in anywhere...in any fucking job....I always end up quitting because of that....
Thank you for posting this video, it managed to calm my anxiety down for a little bit knowing that someone else also goes through this. I have to go outside in a bit and I’m terrified but I’m just gonna do it and hope for the best. Thank you
i have such soical. anxiety i have a fear of getting in a car going to the store i went through a period where. i didnt leave my home. For 4 years. i stayed in the house 24/7. i have such a fear of going. out side i. literally get sick if I do a go outside my hands start locking up my face goes numb my hands go numb my legs go numb I feel like I can't breathe my heart starts beating really fast I feel like I'm going to die so I immediately rushed back into the house where I feel safe again I've been like this for years but then I started getting better worse are going out again and then something triggered all the sudden and now I'm right back in the same spot all over again it's been a little over 3 months and I haven't gone anywhere I won't get in the car I won't go anywhere I just stay home 24/7 the doctor tells me on the phone that it is not healthy to do that so I I try steps of going outside every once in awhile now but then the fear hits me so bad that I can't even do it I have to turn around and go back
This is so relatable. I have trouble taking a walk by myself. I don't think it's that I'm afraid, but I certainly feel the need to avoid people seeing me. I got a dog to help me focus on him rather than my discomfort.
I relate, other comments on this video will be people venting or like their experiences. But I don't have such a bad social life but I'm not close with anyone. I have friends but they don't know my thought process or my sense of humor. I hang around with them to fill a void of emptiness. I'm sure someone can surely relate to this.
One of thing that has helped me when i go out and feel like everybody is watching me, i grab my phone and talk to myself, I would say: take it easy, nothing is going to happen, just breath and calm down and I’ll keep talking to myself like I’m telling a gossip or something with my phone in my ear, that way I’ll never feel alone. I’ve been doing this my whole life and it really helps. I know it sound weird but try it and you’ll see what I’m talking about.
I go outside when i need something and quickly buy it and come home....or with my friend which is once every 3 months...when I'm outside and I'm surrounded with people that I'm not comfortable with I feel like I just wanna disappear I wish I had that power to disappear whenever I want to
i'm actually watching this while getting ready to go out but i jst can't get myself to open that door and step out , totaly understand ur feeling thanks for sharing
I think I've learned to cope with my social anxiety---if that's what it is--- over the years. It seems we all have our own awkward situations. I hated getting haircuts. I don't even get them anymore. I cut my own with machines designed for that. Not to question that you do have SA---I'm sure you do---but it's always struck me as a little strange that so many SA people can get on RU-vid and spill their guts to millions of people. I mean, anybody could see you, including your neighbors. I couldn't imagine doing that. Part of it's body dysmorphia. I cringe at the thought of putting my old face out there. Do you watch other SA people? Do you comment? Do you find watching them helpful? Comforting?
Same here, I have at least 5 years without going to a beauty salon for haircuts. I cut my own hair because I really can't stand all the people and process involved on haircuts!
Here I am just 'strolling comfortably to the shops' never thought about it, but now I appreciate it. I don't know what set this off in you, but I hope you heal, your video is a brave move and very, very interesting, I appreciate you explaining how people with this in their life feel.
I have social anxiety and my advice would be: -don’t give yourself a hard time over it but do try to get to the root cause of the fear itself and become friends with the fear if you can. I have accepted that my social anxiety is based on the fear of being judged by others. Over time I have learnt to say to myself “if they judge you, so be it”. I accept it as well as accepting that people are actually more obsessed about themselves than me. -don’t let your own thoughts pull or put you down. I have learnt that it is my head that is being negative or assuming the worst case scenario. -try to stop the noise in your head. I have learnt to just do something now rather than spend hours or even days preparing for it and over thinking it. I used to hate going to busy malls but now I just go when I need to and keep focused on what I want to do there. I would never say that I am over my social anxiety but I have become friends with it by acknowledging the root cause of my fear. -however uncomfortable, exposure is key. However small the steps you can take, just doing certain things that normally make you feel anxious does help over time.
Same. But im only 16 im turning 17 this August.. Damn i know it's really hard. My life is damn broke rn im at 11 grade and this social anxiety has change my entire life.. Now im at home not going to school anymore i feel like i just want to be home becuz i feel safe here. and i cant fight this. The is one time when im near the school then my social anxiety kick in.... and i was feeling scared and i rush to go home and cry "i dont know why" and after that i question myself "am i crazy?" ... Damn then i found this video i thought im the only one having hard time.. And i have major depression too 😞 idk what to do anymore i feel like ... I dont want to die but i just want to stop existing.
Man, Be glad you are livin in America. I am from India and the city I'm living in is too crowded. I am not scared of facing people when my neighborhood is desolate at night, but when it's overcrowded I get panic attacks, increase in heart rate and shaky limbs. I couldn't even walk confidently or look at people in their face.
I have anxiety, I feel like everywhere I go people are watching me, my parents don’t understand this because they are loud and joyful energetic people, I’m totally the opposite, it’s just hard.
dude i feel you. i have been doing NoFap for 20 days and my social anxiety has decreased slightly, even if you don't believe that NoFap helps with social anxiety, i suggest you try it, i wish you luck bro
Okay, thanks man...I found you on Scott's channel Depression To Expression..btw.. :).. Umm...I have a confession to make though...my videos kinda suck ..I know I can do better but..man..I'm just that bad at talking I guess...I hope to get better.
Living in an apartment is the worst for social anxiety. I'm too fucking afraid to take out the garbage or use the apartment laundromat. Shit is supposed to be easy but anxiety gets the best of me
idk, but i believe that social anxiety and shyness could be solved by just changing ur perspective on how u c things, and i realized that, that nobody actually care when i did something awkward... sure they will remember that awkward thing but believe me people really really obsessed with themselves, they will forget it soon because they are maybe aware about themselves like u... (u r not the main character of the universe, from vsauce :p)... but remember u r also unique...
I have found that when I have told my counselor etc, some have used it against me or say things rude etc. Its like some get off on the fact that I have this fear an they play on it. One had the nerve to tell me, ""lifes over at 40!!"".....I was like shocked he said that.....I thought he was talking about himself at first, later at home, he was talking about me. Just alot of strange behaviour from professionals.
Stacey Walker he may feel the same way that you do, though. It's possible that he is using some sort of satirical comedy to project his own insecurities. He may be trying to connect with you.
Thank you for your honesty good video ,If you find anything that helps let us know ... I have some of the same behaviors.... sure was affirming to know I’m not the only one. The more you stay in the harder it gets to open that door. I’ve planted flowers garden at night, so neighbors don’t look at me.
Dude wtf. I am exactly like this. I have no friends, i wish i did. Like if i did i would be fine going out with them. But im scared to talk in public if people hear our convo. Dang. Or groups, i cant speak in groups cuz idk how to add to convos lol
When i was a kid i don't care about anything i just go outside and play, like badaz confident but now that i am a teen started at around 14-15 i have social anxiety.
Thanks for making this video, I was sorta expecting some form of how to 😅 but having someone openly admit this kinda thing and relate to the anxiety I feel literally any time i step out the door. It doesn’t matter what I’m wearing I always feel naked. Part of me really doesn’t care what people think but another part of me is obsessed idk how to turn it off.
I am experiencing this today more so than other days. It started last night. My anxiety is through the roof. Called out work today, probably tomorrow too. Actually had to order groceries to be delivered today. Cannot take out the trash. This is f-d up. Wow. Thanks for your courage to post this. Praying for you.
Yo this might sound dumb but going to parties getting drunk and hanging out with friends helps a lot it gets you out of your shell and it shows you that being liberated is possible. Also deworming and changing your diet eating more healthier food and exercise like three times a week at least
Respect to you for uploading this video man. I go through the same thing on a daily basis. I've just started a new job and I'm feeling really anxious trying to fit in with my new colleagues, I get really quiet and a little paranoid as well. It is crippling and each day is a roller coaster. Keep your chin up buddy, be strong.
do i have social anxiety? i bought a skateboard because i love it when i go out and do it but it's such a huge thing to open the door because i am arguing inside of my head and i think people will look at me and judge me. im fine when i go out with friends though
Thats me its so freaking hard to walk my dog and because i dont walk her a lot she walks away and stands and then I start to panic when people come and walk and I start to over think and I look ugly etc. But I have to walk her bc she'll be depressed so :/ yea
Hi Kenneth, Do you know that it's easier to hear people outside because the inside of your apt is quiet, whereas the people outside have a bunch of background noises so it's harder for them to hear you? I remember asking someone about the same thing you were wondering about, like can they hear me just as good as I hear them because I play voice video games sometimes and wondered if the outside people heard me. I have social anxiety too which keeps me isolated. It's the worst combination to feel you want to be around people because you're lonely, but scared of people at the same time. You're not alone. I really enjoy your videos. Thank you. :)
Almost anything I do involves being around people, crowds, social interactions. I can't even concieve the thought of wasting time worring and wondering what other people think, I wouldn't get through my day. This shit is scary cos I used to be like that, very self conscious of what others thought of me and NOW IDGAF and like to socialize.
Thank you for sharing. i need to go out today and this made me feel a lot less alone. i was beating myself up about how im terrified to do it but knowing im not the only one helps a lot. Also, your glasses are very cute! I hope you get out of the trailer soon and im proud of you for going off and being independent from your mother even though you deal with social anxiety.
I'm in the same boat and I'm a multi-millionaire. I always thought I could earn my way out of it through income but even that isn't working. I have found that exercise and a healthy diet is somewhat helping, I still have extreme anxiety yet I power through it enough to go outside on occasion. It still takes me about an hour of prep to psyche myself up and I also leave my place when very few people are outside because the sun is literally just rising. I still feel like everyone is looking at me (even though we all know they aren't) but the anxiety is somewhat diluted. Unfortunately it seems like the only way to get through extreme anxiety is either by necessity from something like having to leave for groceries or by consistently increasing gradual exposure. I'm 37 and have had this my whole life so it's not an easy process and it's a horrible condition because no one truly understands it unless they have gone through it.
Omg I never really knew what this meant, but I have this too. Some days you just don’t wanna be seen by anyone, scared of what people will think of you. I would avoid doing the simplest things and errands if that meant to be in public but it is also a very depressing and lonely feeling to stay alone inside all the time...sucks! Constant battle to get out of your own head..
I never knew what social anxiety was until I researched it. I definitely dont feel alone in this. I always thought social anxiety was like being afraid to stand in front of the classroom and present a project. It's much more than that. Social anxiety is like agoraphobia. I'm not afraid to leave the area but, I am afraid to be in a social setting. There have been incidents at work where I felt dizzy, unable to breathe, feeling like i was going crazy. Right now, I'm in a pickle because I dont know what to do about work.
I think I have developed this over the years. I hate to go outside especially on my day off. I hate driving. I hate traffic. I feel trapped when I am in a lot of traffic. Since I moved to my house in 2010, October 2010, my house was broken into and TV stolen while the alarm was on and I was at home upstairs. In 2013, my shed was broken into and around $800 worth of lawn equipment was stolen. October of that year, I was mugged. In 2014, (I think) there was a van that drove by and dropped off a dead body 100 feet from my house. I was at work at the time. Around 0.5 miles south of my house there are shootings and drug deals. This specific neighborhood is a quiet neighborhood of elderly people who have been living there for decades. I have this fear that I need to deal with, especially if I want to go forward in ministry. This is beginning to really become a stronghold. I still try to convince myself 2 Timothy 1:7 Modern English Version (MEV) 7 For God has not given us the spirit of fear, but of power, and love, and self-control. But until then, I press on trying to deal with this.
Hey Kenneth, I came across your channel through depressiontoexpression and I do not subscribe to many people nowadays but something about you I can relate to. I suffered from very bad depression and social anxiety also. My depression has gotten better but my social anxiety I am still working on. In fact, I applaud you for having this channel and sharing your thoughts because it does help people. Me personally, I would be too scared to start videos because I am overly critical of myself, negative, and I over analyze all the time. But I'm glad making videos has helped you cope with everything and gives you an outlet to talk. Social anxiety does suck and I feel for you:(. Best advice I can give about making friends is tell them straight up you have social anxiety and it takes a huge weight off your shoulders. There are people out there that will accept you for all your flaws you just have to take that first step. Best of luck and keep making awesome videos ;)
+Nicole Deitz Thanks! I really appreciate your feedback and support. I know I don't suffer as much as a lot of people because we're all different, but I'll do my best to share what I've experienced. I've learned a lot about myself and others by having this channel. You're awesome! Best of luck to you too :)
I don't like going outside I feel like everyone is stearing at me and talking about me. I gained lots of weight I want to go for a jogging but thought of there will be lots of People make me nervous.
Kudos to you for uploading this video! I can’t even dare to upload anything on RU-vid without me deleting a few days later. I don’t like attention wether it’s good or positive, I like to hide a lot. Mostly because when I speak I don’t have a filter, I’m very honest and a lot of people find it either offensive or weird.
Me rn I want to go out and exercise by riding my bike but I'm scared that ppl will judge me or talk about me. In reality I know no one will even care but it's so hard to get past it.
Thank you for sharing this. I am struggling to go outside right now and I really related to the feelings and experiences you described. Just hearing someone else talk about these feelings is so helpful. Good on you for making this video because I feel like I could never record myself sharing my feelings
I have social anxiety disorder I do go out but I don't feel comfortable a lot I got to give you credit though you got in front of the camera and speak some of your videos I see get over 10,000 views so you must be doing something right, if all these people are watching me what is the difference if one of my neighbors is that's what you got a pound into your head, not trying to tell you what to do I know it's hard because I go through it but I think you're doing a great job
my social anxiety is so severe It affects the way i walk,talk,act,etc even inside my house but gets horrible when i'm outside, if the gym has a lot of people i go home and don't workout, if the streets have too many people i give up on going to the market, every part of my life has been affected by social anxiety (and agoraphobia) i feel uncomfortable in my own skin, kinda dragging my body to walk, can't take photos of myself, everything. social anxiety is horrible
It is commendable that you admit your fear, but you need to take action to overcome it. I suffered from the same anxiety but I got used to speaking to people.
I joined the military. It magnifies all my fears and anxieties. Like electron microscope level. However, the environment is actually helping me deal with it, such as interacting with others and networking. This weekend I had the pleasure of briefing a plan to 30 high ranking officers, and I wasn’t supposed to do it and I was only given 15 minutes to prepare.
I can't make any friends anymore I lost all my communication skills evertime I try to make friends awkwardness interfere and feel like I make them feel uncomfortable I can't hold eye contact and I always look angry and serious in social situation can't connect with anyone. Help! 😭
I feel your pain brother.. I rarely go out unless I have to. I will look outside to make sure noone is there before I check the mail or take out trash, etc. I did start a job and been there 10 months (longest regular job ever) but in turn I have lost a ton of weight because the stress of the job and going out causes me to not eat. I get nautious if I try. I think some of mine may stem from elementary school. My mom stuck me in the same school as my rich cousins, so I was the ONLY kid at that school who didn't have the latest nikes or other expensive cloths, so I got tormented daily. Once it awhile I would snap and hit one of these rotten kids, then the teachers say that I am the one with the problem, like I have an imbalance or something. It's like no, just don;t fk with me. It is hard man but it has gotten ever so slightly better at times, then back to normal at other times. Roller coaster ride for sure. Maybe we are wanderer's. They say wanderer's do not fit in at all in society. It's a spiritual/esoteric thing. Anyway hope your doing okay. Thanks for the videos!
Behold for each mood is likened Unto the ever changing seasons Some dark or dull Other's bright or warm Remember that all seasons Pass on by and change 💪
I can't even walk past strangers in the street as I just get all awkward and don't know how to react when they look at me so I just look down and pretend I'm on my phone, I just get nervous and uncomfortable with everything once I step out of my flat and in public.. I'm 36 and very unlikely I will ever meet a women and the chance to have kids as I'm just such a nervous wreck it's just such a constant misery and the thought of death feels so comforting for me.. wish I was a normal confident person that's comfortable in my skin 😥😥
