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Social Skills Everyone Should Know 

Science of People
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Which social skills do you have? Most people don't realize charisma comes in many different flavors. There are 14 distinct social skills you can have -- knowing what your social strengths are is key to having great AUTHENTIC social interactions.
Do you feel awkward? You might be using your non-natural social skills. In this video, learn which skills you have and how to improve others.
In this video:
0:00 Intro
0:59 Linchpin
1:54 Conversationalist
3:22 The comedian
4:18 Speaker
4:58 Influencer
5:41 Listener
6:46 Magnet
7:36 Storyteller
8:41 Nurturer
9:30 Decoder
10:35 Leader
11:36 Connector
12:26 Dreambuilder
13:06 Chameleon
13:49 Final thoughts
******
Hi, I’m Vanessa!
You deserve more. More influence, more income, more of what you want. I would be honored to help you.
Do you want to be the most likable person in the room? Get my FREE guide now: www.scienceofpeople.com/
My name is Vanessa Van Edwards and I’m a recovering awkward person. I’m also a multi-time bestselling author of:
Cues: Master the Secret Language of Charismatic Communication (www.scienceofpeople.com/cues/) Captivate: The Science of Succeeding with People (www.scienceofpeople.com/capti...) and I am the creator of People School. This advanced video communication course is for high achievers who want to be confident communicators.
My goal is simple: Help YOU get to your goals faster. Never be overlooked, interrupted or forgotten again.
PS - Get our free 60-minute online trainings: www.scienceofpeople.com
+ Join the party on Instagram: / vvanedwards
******
PS - Join the conversation on social!
☞ Facebook: / vvanedwards
☞ Twitter: / vvanedwards
☞ Instagram: / vvanedwards

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11 июн 2024

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Комментарии : 490   
@ScienceOfPeople
@ScienceOfPeople 4 года назад
Find out more in our full article on this topic ☞ www.scienceofpeople.com/social-skills/
@ramnauthramjattan8744
@ramnauthramjattan8744 3 года назад
Am
@akashsekar4007
@akashsekar4007 3 года назад
Is that normal to be magnet... because I tend to feel bit overwhelmed of it ....
@akashsekar4007
@akashsekar4007 3 года назад
I can say yes for 12 of this but can't say yes for Chameleon /Linchpin
@inam4902
@inam4902 3 года назад
i need your email id to connect with you on linkedin.
@boonesamuel1935
@boonesamuel1935 2 года назад
i dont mean to be so off topic but does any of you know a tool to get back into an Instagram account..? I was stupid lost my login password. I appreciate any assistance you can offer me
@abuhuraira3685
@abuhuraira3685 4 года назад
Sometimes the people you think don't want to talk to you are the ones waiting for you to talk to them
@brunobilandzija1823
@brunobilandzija1823 3 года назад
i can tell you - focus and practice ;)
@roarrrist
@roarrrist 3 года назад
no way
@sponge7464
@sponge7464 2 года назад
Can confirm
@agentjordan605
@agentjordan605 2 года назад
Oh interesting
@sal2417
@sal2417 4 месяца назад
Sometimes the people you think don't want to fu€k are the main people who actually want to fu€k you
@elainee313
@elainee313 4 года назад
Is anyone else here feeling like you have none of these skills?
@Bliss_Corner
@Bliss_Corner 4 года назад
Exactly, i feel so bankrupt social skill wise
@Ronaldinho1312
@Ronaldinho1312 4 года назад
You can learn it. Vanessa is a great teacher. Charly Houpert and Olivia Fox Cabane are also good teachers. But Vanessa alone is enough to become a "social god" :D
@justoverbroke8063
@justoverbroke8063 4 года назад
Yeah I only related to comedian
@beemo9
@beemo9 4 года назад
Make up a category - how would you describe yourself?
@jeka13443
@jeka13443 3 года назад
@@justoverbroke8063 this is a solid one! I think I'm only a listener
@blinddatereject
@blinddatereject 4 года назад
1) Glue - keep people together 2) Conversationalist - articulate 3) Comedian 4) Speaker 5) Influencer 6) Listener 7) Magnet 8) Storyteller 9) Nurturer 10) Decoder 11) Leader 12) Connector 13) Dreambuilder 14) Chameleon Not sure the point of this video... just to inform? Can these skills be learned or are they just a part of our nature?
@thairinkhudr4259
@thairinkhudr4259 4 года назад
I guess part of the reason for this video is to identify which skill/s you resonate with naturally and to find ways to amplify those skills.
@onatone
@onatone 4 года назад
This is more so of an overview of the many "roles" of social interactions. What I assume the video is for is to identify the traits you resonate with the most naturally and identify the traits you are not that very good at. With that information you can work and amplify the traits you already have and the ones you dont atleast you can work on. Knowing what you are and cant do can help you understand yourself much more this is helpful when meeting new people and work situations.
@taras4352
@taras4352 4 года назад
It was interesting to me and if you want to learn more and develop one of these more, like listening, she has an online school/ program. :)
@worldofmine6175
@worldofmine6175 3 года назад
She said she has a site so u can go and learn them
@darleenperry1012
@darleenperry1012 3 года назад
@@worldofmine6175 of course. Follow the 💰
@honeybunnybunny1958
@honeybunnybunny1958 4 года назад
As someone with no friends or family and no college education I have a hard time socializing and being confident your videos have most definitely gotten me jobs
@CraftyBirdGirl
@CraftyBirdGirl 3 года назад
Hey, nice username xD
@honeybunnybunny1958
@honeybunnybunny1958 3 года назад
Honeybunni99 haha you too 🤣🐰🐰🐰
@juliec9531
@juliec9531 2 года назад
You are special and amazing :) want to be friends?
@gracebediako1666
@gracebediako1666 Год назад
Same no college no friends just been working good jobs
@kyriademba6703
@kyriademba6703 4 года назад
Nurturer has no boundaries, they re kind of caring too much and sometimes get disappointed because they think everyone must be like them
@taraf4890
@taraf4890 4 года назад
This is me. Work my ass off to keep friendships, remember bdays, text people and plan events... It is not often reciprocated :(
@globalvillage423
@globalvillage423 4 года назад
They are also gullible, indecisive and risk averse.
@adeelali8417
@adeelali8417 3 года назад
@@taraf4890 Set boundaries. Remember boundaries are loving not to only to keep people out but to let the right people in.
@Aclien2
@Aclien2 4 года назад
"Effortlessly"... That was SO CUTE.
@TheX16xel
@TheX16xel 3 года назад
Hehe... i am not a native English speaker and... in my native language i got.. some t.twisters... examples folow: "W Strzebrzeszynie chrząszcz brzmi w trzcinie.". "Szosą suchą". Translations: 1st: a bug buzzes in the bushes (in a village named Strzebrzeszyn). 2nd: "on a dry road"
@artiolbregu2456
@artiolbregu2456 2 года назад
Yeph for sure
@JohnDoe-qq8et
@JohnDoe-qq8et 4 года назад
I can never picture you as anything close to socially awkward.
@Rooster1508
@Rooster1508 4 года назад
There is another skill. Active Listening. In a small group when a person is presenting I listen carefully and if something is not clear I will interrupt and ask for more details. This let the speaker know you are paying attention and are interested.
@adibhutani9977
@adibhutani9977 3 года назад
Listener was one of the type of the social skills she mentioned. So maybe you’re not that good a listener apparently :P
@obende
@obende 3 года назад
@@adibhutani9977 I believe active listening is different from just regular listening because it requires you to immediately respond rather than just being quiet -- hence OP mentioning interrupting, but not interrupting disrespectfully. But yeah I can agree active listening is a subset of listening. It's just different enough to be separate though.
@adibhutani9977
@adibhutani9977 3 года назад
Jay G Sounds quite right. Agreed.
@akni3547
@akni3547 3 года назад
Decoder?
@iBreVen
@iBreVen 4 года назад
can u make a vid about how to improve every one of them
@fenfrk
@fenfrk 3 года назад
Here's a secret. People who feel they don't have good social skills can be something the world cannot get enough of, a great listener. Quite honestly, people are dying to be heard, and in this fast paced world, there are not enough good listeners. To talk to someone, have them really hear you, is gold. Fake talk is everywhere, good listening is not.
@native369
@native369 2 года назад
Effortlessly blew my mind... The world needs more awkward people.
@MANDS81
@MANDS81 3 месяца назад
Agree :)) She had me there too! Being authentic is what I'm embracing more of, guess this could be why one relates with. Where you're at, seeing ones strong suit and not
@BioPhilReturns
@BioPhilReturns 4 года назад
Vanessa talks about showing vulnerability and not trying to be perfect is a great trait of personality and I love how she shows it in that video, Love the book and the video
@goldenlioness868
@goldenlioness868 9 месяцев назад
I’ve tried to be more open but often when I show venerability it gets used against me. There I go back into my shell of not trusting people.
@honeybunnybunny1958
@honeybunnybunny1958 4 года назад
I just want to say I absolutely appreciate your existence. Thank you for sharing and helping awkwards world wide 😇
@marianormann9599
@marianormann9599 3 года назад
You’re the only person on the internet I trust about charisma tips. Thank you for the content!
@JesusHernandez-ht1hm
@JesusHernandez-ht1hm 3 года назад
Yourself is truly a captivating awkward human being Vanessa, I admire and appreciate you!
@greggillson388
@greggillson388 4 года назад
Just as i feared. I have no social skills whatsoever.... I don't fear public speaking, but don't seek it out. Some people think I'm funny, but i don't want to entertain. Spontaneous unscripted conversations are dreadful (better since studying Captivate) but i have a phobia of telephone conversations, especially making them. I'm great at writing. Fibres me a chance to organize my thoughts and vocabulary.
@outps
@outps 4 года назад
Sad I officially have zero social skills!
@outps
@outps 3 года назад
@Uvoicer Text To Speech this is supposed to be a joke, sorry you didn't get it lol
@zzulm
@zzulm 4 года назад
I've always been around toxic people and I know I'm glue because I see good in everyone and I end up hating it.
@adaphrochajio9927
@adaphrochajio9927 3 года назад
Like her fluently Like her enthusiasm Like her magnetising ability Like her strong personality She does look like actress galgadot. May be she can be the next wonder women..😅😅😊😊 Very informative..(science of people) ...ThanksVVE
@thesaxon5847
@thesaxon5847 2 месяца назад
That was really insightful, I hadn't thought that deeply before about what I meant by wanting to improve my social skills. This breaks it down really well and makes it clear what I need/want to improve upon. The fact that you have a plethora of resources for me to now look into is very impressive. Thank you Vanessa
@ScienceOfPeople
@ScienceOfPeople 2 месяца назад
Oh wow! That's so wonderful to know! You're most welcome! 💖🙏🏻
@lenaxox4167
@lenaxox4167 2 года назад
this really made me feel better about myself as i am a nurterer and decoder:) my sister is amazing at socialising and i have always felt inferior but i now realise i have my own strengths, thank you vanessa!
@metheyoshi
@metheyoshi 4 года назад
I like how you explained and thought of all these aspects. It's getting my mind going on how to improve. Things I could focus on more directy.
@mav6232
@mav6232 3 года назад
this insight of the different kind of social skills, i wasnt even aware was a thing. I knew them seperately but never occured to me that they are under a umbrella. This was great! thank you!
@doubleojenn
@doubleojenn 3 года назад
Hahaha I had the worst time trying to say ‘subsequently’ during a presentation!! It was exactly the same as you here!
@naragrace3870
@naragrace3870 3 года назад
I thought I didn’t have any of these social skills but I’m actually a conversationalist! Good to know!
@nick55ification
@nick55ification 4 года назад
You're deffff a magnet😊 and thanks for the vid! I'm always interested in breakdowns, categories and lists so thanks! I feel like we'd get a long well. But I'm also not a great listener lol but I practice and can do it
@irishchocolate3872
@irishchocolate3872 4 года назад
It if funny. I don’t fall under any of these 14 social skills. I have one trait here or there but none of these 14 skills correctly describe me.
@alyssaherren8957
@alyssaherren8957 3 года назад
Overall I'm a Chameleon but my strongest skills are magnet, conversationalist, dream builder. The ones I'd like to improve are speaker, story teller, linchpin or leader.
@alyssaherren8957
@alyssaherren8957 3 года назад
It's also mind blowing that I'm a veryyyy natural conversationalist and social butterfly. I fit in with anyone and I'm good at fixing their problems and having good conversations, but I thought that's how everyone was so it's crazy to me reading the comments here like "I have no skills" I'm just baffled. That's so different for me to grasp.
@jadevanita6654
@jadevanita6654 4 года назад
Bravo for your great work Vanessa. You are incredible and I love you more than you know!
@socialglitch2663
@socialglitch2663 Месяц назад
Man, I’m terrible in all areas. But not a surprise! I appreciate the breakdown. It’s good to know there are different skillsets within the larger skillset.
@t0neknee86
@t0neknee86 4 года назад
Amazing social skills, thanks Vanessa. Blessings from Puebla, Mexico.
@aaronarunasalam3989
@aaronarunasalam3989 3 года назад
Thanks ma'am.. based on the 14 social skills which you've elaborated, I've identified my top 3 social skills which I'm good at: 1) COMEDIAN 2) LISTENER 3) DREAM BUILDER
@GeorgeKorobkov
@GeorgeKorobkov 4 года назад
sooo cool!!! Vanessa, you so positive and sweet! :) I love you and your video. Thank you very much for such an amazing effort!
@satisham5885
@satisham5885 4 года назад
Excellent. Thank you for making this video ❤️.
@AntMannall
@AntMannall 3 года назад
Very good video Vanessa. Enlightening in regards these various components. Ill be looking into your class and the areas I need to improve on with you. :)
@LauraWald
@LauraWald 3 года назад
Thank you! This is incredibly informational. One more thing...can you please shar the make and model of your microphone. Your sound is excellent.
@maeganv9865
@maeganv9865 4 года назад
Thank you so much vanessa!!! ❤❤❤
@imrahnmitha6404
@imrahnmitha6404 4 года назад
Vanessa's content is always excellenttt - also how awesome is her energy ?
@orionanderson6719
@orionanderson6719 3 года назад
I like how you made that comeback at the end with that very excellent pronunciation. Thank you very much for the content and have a great day
@CarlosRDuran
@CarlosRDuran 7 месяцев назад
I’m devouring all Vanessa content, super powerful and super useful information, it’s helping me out and also my students. I’m determined to learn every single pice of Vanessa’s work. ❤❤❤❤
@ScienceOfPeople
@ScienceOfPeople 7 месяцев назад
I am SO thrilled to hear that. ❤ Thank you for being here!
@all-up
@all-up 4 года назад
We need them more than ever in crowded areas, life savers indeed. .
@HowToADU
@HowToADU 4 года назад
You do this so EFFORTLESSLY :)
@Top40Music
@Top40Music 3 года назад
Thank You So Much for this Great Video! It was so helpful.
@Erudite48085
@Erudite48085 3 года назад
LOVE her!! 💘 Funny but very educational and super helpful tips. 👍 And she does it......effortlessly! Giggle!😆🤣😉
@TC-rv6sz
@TC-rv6sz Год назад
Wow, I rarely find videos where more than 50% of it is cool new stuff I've never heard of before. Thank you thank you Vanessa for sharing this! I decided this week that I'm going to stop making excuses for my crippling social anxiety and develop some skills to help me better put myself out there and live life more fully.
@ScienceOfPeople
@ScienceOfPeople 11 месяцев назад
Oh I love to hear this!! You're so welcome. You got this ❤️
@julystylez5087
@julystylez5087 3 года назад
I love u because you help non sociable people....People are most concern with being judged and have a tough time overcoming it
@linneasundell8682
@linneasundell8682 3 года назад
I recently found you and I admire you so much, I wish to have your confidence and social skills
@lolalo6174
@lolalo6174 3 года назад
You can work on it
@FearlessLeis
@FearlessLeis 10 месяцев назад
Dreambuilder, nurturer, leader, chameleon, comedian, decoder Aspiring: listener, influence, magnet.
@ScienceOfPeople
@ScienceOfPeople 10 месяцев назад
Love it!
@ab-jc8nv
@ab-jc8nv 7 месяцев назад
Hi
@Toggy287
@Toggy287 8 месяцев назад
The way you compliment and explain makes me think you really care xo
@ScienceOfPeople
@ScienceOfPeople 8 месяцев назад
♥️♥️
@yashathawale3291
@yashathawale3291 3 года назад
Advantageous video 👌👌😇 Informative
@shivampradhan6101
@shivampradhan6101 3 года назад
seriously i opened this video with very less expectation . but this is just the one basic video requires to improve myself which was missing .Thanks.
@isaidiaz5485
@isaidiaz5485 4 года назад
Lovely teaching thanks 😊
@singletonjays
@singletonjays 2 года назад
Very well done, thanks.
@Annawillden
@Annawillden 4 года назад
This video was so interesting!! Thank you!
@joannametayer8628
@joannametayer8628 Год назад
Great video!!! Love this❤ I learn so much about the people in my life or have crossed path with. And see these different personalities within them. So cool. Thanks
@ScienceOfPeople
@ScienceOfPeople Год назад
I'm so glad you loved it! ❤
@BillieBluntTV
@BillieBluntTV 3 года назад
Wow!! Look at her smile!
@amywilson8824
@amywilson8824 4 года назад
My husband and I are both magnets. I did not know this is a social skill! Also I’m conversationalist but I tend to like story tellers because that’s not my best quality. We are also both great nurturers. We are a perfect match. I am also a decoder! Very cool. This is a great video!
@keylanoslokj1806
@keylanoslokj1806 7 месяцев назад
So you r the hypernormies couple 😂
@goodgirlvicki
@goodgirlvicki Год назад
I'm definitely a comedian, leader and conector
@AA-to3hx
@AA-to3hx 2 года назад
thank you so much
@meechandise6557
@meechandise6557 3 года назад
lol I have none I’m the quiet one with stress and anxiety. Thanks to social anxiety
@cUnHVN777
@cUnHVN777 Год назад
Really WELL DONE video! You are effortless! I got tripped up by the title & almost passed u by! I don't "should" on me!!! Have a blessed day! Thank Q~
@ScienceOfPeople
@ScienceOfPeople Год назад
Thanks so much!! I'm glad you enjoyed it!
@MANDS81
@MANDS81 3 месяца назад
😅 You had me at Effort...liley , great example of being real 😊 👋 love the content
@ScienceOfPeople
@ScienceOfPeople 3 месяца назад
Thanks for watching! =)
@ingriddryden1607
@ingriddryden1607 4 года назад
The high neurotic in me is starting to sweat... I made it to social skill #8 and still haven't found my top 3 skills😬
@GirlTawk101
@GirlTawk101 Год назад
OMG this, is by far, has been my favorite video on your page. I've been struggling to talk about myself and write a cover letter. With this video I have gain a better way to describe myself. That will actually appeal to employers. 🔥💜 Side note, leaving the blooper of you stumbling over "effortlessly" in the main part of the video. Content/relatable gold. Really great way to connect with your audience
@ScienceOfPeople
@ScienceOfPeople Год назад
Thank you!
@WillOliveira
@WillOliveira 3 года назад
Thank you for share your knowledge
@nurfashanaisha3891
@nurfashanaisha3891 2 года назад
Thank you for this video! im thinking of improving my social skills for better life
@lamouralice4533
@lamouralice4533 3 года назад
Thank you 🙏🏻 it is really useful
@minjael
@minjael 4 года назад
Thank you 😊
@mattpasco3750
@mattpasco3750 2 года назад
I honestly like you SO MUCH MORE after seeing you keep the funny B-reel out takes in this video, thank you
@Ruby-cj7xi
@Ruby-cj7xi 4 года назад
First one to watch here . You are amazingly funny and smart ❤️. I'm definitely a magnite
@kamalthiagarajan4861
@kamalthiagarajan4861 4 года назад
🅘︎ 🅛︎🅞︎🅥︎🅔︎ 🅤︎
@davyzoehinga2760
@davyzoehinga2760 Год назад
Thanks for sharing . That let me know That i am a leader
@nswarrior
@nswarrior 6 месяцев назад
Very helpful. Thank you.
@ScienceOfPeople
@ScienceOfPeople 6 месяцев назад
You're welcome - so glad I could help!
@noncebadube7353
@noncebadube7353 3 года назад
Lol I really got connected to your energy as soon as you started talking. I even subscribed.
@Mada_94_
@Mada_94_ 4 года назад
Loved the video!❤️ If I am a conversationalist only, what carreers should I pursue?
@lucianojanducci9907
@lucianojanducci9907 5 месяцев назад
Thanks for the video.
@ScienceOfPeople
@ScienceOfPeople 5 месяцев назад
My pleasure!
@greggillson388
@greggillson388 4 года назад
There's no such thing as awkward silence. Silence is golden. On the other hand I've had numerous awkward conversations...
@alan2102X
@alan2102X 4 года назад
"Awkward" = important if unpleasant truth being revealed, somehow.
@theschoolofbodylanguage
@theschoolofbodylanguage Год назад
Thanks 😊
@shahfaraz9770
@shahfaraz9770 Год назад
Well Done Great Thanks for educating us
@ScienceOfPeople
@ScienceOfPeople Год назад
It's my pleasure! Thanks for watching.
@godaughter4044
@godaughter4044 Год назад
I thank you.
@lilimontes6767
@lilimontes6767 3 года назад
This was a really interesting video! Does anyone have any insight/tips based on these rankings? Always looking for more ways to improve :) I got: 1. Magnet 2. Speaker 3. Leader 4. Dreambuilder 5. Influencer 6. Chameleon 7. Connector 8. Linchpin 9. Listener 10. Conversationalist 11. Decoder 12. Comedian 13. Storyteller 14. Nurturer
@venkatesapalanithangavelu
@venkatesapalanithangavelu 2 года назад
Hi Vanessa That's Chill - Kudos ✌️
@mjdny9871
@mjdny9871 4 года назад
I like the Positive high energy, combined with a smile that you always maintain in all your videos and presentations. As well as the great content that you always share with us (audience).
@MikeRatushniak-cu1rw
@MikeRatushniak-cu1rw 4 месяца назад
Very true
@kaiak3520
@kaiak3520 3 года назад
My top three are decoder, connector and dream builder. Perfectly suits my career.
@honeybunnybunny1958
@honeybunnybunny1958 4 года назад
I am becoming a decoder :O omg am I a wizard girl this video has done opened my eyes I thought I wa skillless talentless 😢 THANK YOU
@sithmichameesha9444
@sithmichameesha9444 3 года назад
Thanks.
@satyatathya5176
@satyatathya5176 3 года назад
Excellent
@daniellomeli926
@daniellomeli926 2 года назад
Thank you for leaving the bloopers
@andyfield7397
@andyfield7397 4 года назад
after you got stuck on "effortlessly" - I couldn't say it either 😂😂😂 !!!
@rman6572
@rman6572 3 года назад
I am none of the above. Great. . .
@juandavid018
@juandavid018 4 года назад
I love following and learning just about everything you put out. I am a = (Magnet + influencer + decoder + chameleon) with my most dominant trait as decoder. I believe the type of work I do has forced me to become those mixed styles. I wish I was a comedian and less of a nurturing listener outside of business. Do you have any tips how to flip the switch and adjust one's personality traits from the business world into a more social/family/fun environment and less critical? I struggle with my work personality flowing into my family/ friends environment. Look forward to your next video.
@manishpargai2950
@manishpargai2950 4 года назад
Thanks
@activeanna_s
@activeanna_s 4 года назад
Vanessa you are amazing
@Dre9Mega
@Dre9Mega 3 года назад
Wow! I've always wondered why I could tell someone's motive by observing their movements, way of speaking, facial expressions etc. Even with the least interaction when speaking with people I can usually sense how the atmosphere is going by their slightest of movement. I'm also able to bring those around me together and help others when in need. I have a large frame so people are sometimes afraid to approach at 1st but when they see my face (babyface) or speak with me, the ice is usually broken. I get along with most people and I have a very positive nature and aim to perfect myself and those around me; in the realm of realism. I suppose that makes me a Chameleon right?
@conversationcorner1837
@conversationcorner1837 2 года назад
You sound very perceptive.
@muskduh
@muskduh 3 года назад
wow thanks great delivery style
@qwertyqwerty1955
@qwertyqwerty1955 2 года назад
Vanessa: I just discovered your YT site ! You cover topics that I had been looking for ! at 2:18 it seemed that you were using the "pratfall effect" ! Although unintentional, it did make me like you even more !
@wildmattzz
@wildmattzz 4 года назад
Chameleon 💯💪❤️ Such a great video, thanks 💯💯💯💯
@janananahhhh361
@janananahhhh361 4 года назад
Cassandra your book is amazing
@JiyainIzzatKaySath
@JiyainIzzatKaySath 4 года назад
A great video again.👍💯 Stay blessed and protected!🤲✌💯 Aamin Summa Aamin!
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