Isn’t that normal tho? Everything she said, I feel the same way. 💀 except , people who like me for me, usually make me feel irritated and wanna loose all connection with them, but I need them for what they can give me… ??
The way she described it sounds like someone with empathy and a balance EQ. To seek for a connection that makes you want to take AND give back in return--- simply put, she seeks reciprocity in every close connection she intends to make. I don't see anything wrong with that.
@@CrazyBunniePandapeople who like you for you feel uncomfortable for many people because many people aren’t comfortable with who they think they are. It’s their shadow that they have conflicts with. A part of their psyche that they try so hard not to be. However you shouldn’t ignore your shadow. Rather embrace it
I feel other peoples emotions and experiences so intensely its painful. As if i am actually experiencing it. My amygdala is overactive and over stimulated because of my childhood so i can really relate to how your brain didnt develop the proper way either. We didnt choose this shit. We can only try to be the best people we can be now
You have an anxious attachment style and you are a people pleaser. Most of the time the feelings you think you are picking up from someone else is your assumptions. It isn’t necessarily a real emotion from anyone but yourself. Its you being hyper vigilant from growing up around chaos.
It isn't that "the brain didn't develop a proper way", it's a variation of the "average" brain structure. In psychology, there is no such thing as "normal". Psychopaths/Sociopaths/narcissists (all people who do not have emotional empathy) served an adaptive advantage in the ancestral environment. Furthermore, there is an awful lot of variation and overlap, and people's behavior is on a continuum rather than in categories; sociopathy/psychopathy and narcissism are scales rather than categories, and most healthy people are somewhere in the middle.
@@Jessiethegirl23 If i see videos of cruelty done to whatever animal, i feel such an emotional pain. Also, i feel their despair, pain, total fear, sadness, distrust, panic. My brain literally fries!!! Horrible. Just horrible what humans do to animals.
@TheCerebralNarcissist Yes, exactly! I have my masters degree in counseling psychology, and you explained this very well. Mental “illness” means behaviors are onthe extreme ends of continuums and their behaviors have a negative impact on themselves and or others.
@@Kerry.moynihan.intellectual aspd is still useful. People with ASPD are in the police, military, CEOS, and even surgeons. Their condition makes them excellent at handling stressful situations. You don't want an evil person doing those things, but psychopathy doesn't inherently make one evil.
Thank you for explaining this. I have a friend who just admitted to me the other day that he is a sociopath but I imagine it's on a spectrum. He has actually treated me better than any other man that I've ever had in my life. He has been there for me when I needed him and he actually seems to care about me. When he said that, I was a little wary after that but I'm not going to judge him for it. He can't help how he is and though I am going to pay attention to what he said, I'm not immediately going to write him off. I just know not to get to attached to him.
My husband is this way, its most likely a trauma response. Its like i love him so much and show affection unconditionally that he feels like i deserve the same thing and he feels bad about not getting butterflies like i do. I dont hate him for it and i dont try to force him to do anything, he treats me very well and id never trade him for anyone
I have adhd and I was born extremely empathetic (along w the other women in my family) and I love your content and wish you all the best! Watching you be open about your experiences is very interesting, and myself being on the opposite end of the empathy spectrum feels like an exercise of putting myself in someone’s shoes who has a very different experience. Kinda paradoxical, empathizing with non-empathy ! Lol peace and blessings, beautiful!!
With ADHD I am either extremely empathetic or couldn't give a flying one because I am burned out. So I do understand what it might feel like to lack empathy
Same for me... But I had trauma happened in very veryyyy early childhood so it's like I have 2 extremes... No in between... I dunno if this ever gets normal... Probably if I get rid of dissociation but idk Happened to early and after that a lot more
Sometimes when you're young you are extremely sensitive for others and yourself that you say I am too soft too careful,I have got to harden up so you harden up and in the process you turn your self into a sociopath @@khanom3033
people in the comments making people with psychopathy sound like bad people are part of the problem. i struggle with bpd and i see how the stigma affects my ability to get treatment bc even medical professionals label us “difficult” and “untreatable”. psychopaths and sociopaths are people who also struggle with their disorder and the stigma around it. We are not all bad people, you just need to change your pov and try to understand that many are trying to get better. no all of us are bad people or abusers
It sucks that it makes for a hard time. That being said it makes no sense to be around someone with these issues unless you want life to be miserable. So sorry that it is that way, but it’s for self preservation.
I'm sorry it's difficult to you to find help. It's even more difficult for people who have been destroyed by people with Cluster B disorders. I can love you more than you can imagine~but it's gonna be from waaaaay over here! You personally may not feel like you are evil. But the destruction Cluster Bs leave behind certainly is. 🤷♀️ I'd say Big Hugs but I knew you probably can't stand to be touched in any way. Which sucks because most of you are the most beautiful talented humans....I wish you a peaceful life.
@@allywolf9182lol no, it is definitely waaay more difficult for cluster b people to find psychological help than to the codependent people they “destroy”. The bast majority of mental health specialist can and will be willing to help someone in a crisis for a relationship with a cluster b person, but will have no idea how to successfully help someone with cluster b traits. Maybe ask yourself why you need to portrait yourself as the victim of even the healing process. Plus wtf with being so so hateful and hurtful to some stranger that is clearly seeking help just because you cannot understand they are not the person that hurt you even if they have the same diagnosis. Grow up.
Well, you seem to forget. If you bring her no value, you now become useless and invisible. So even if what she described is true, the second that "love" interest doesn't fulfill their purpose, it's over.
so true. if you can put up with my bs and i dont see or sense any negative reaction then to put it bluntly youre mine now. well until you mess up and find it almost impossible to forgive you..
Yeah babe. You have a problem with it? You're just mad no one loves you to the degree a narc has to love themselves. You neglect to realize that her brain would not have any sanity or reality or peace without that protection of herself but you want to take that away because it scares you? Who really I'd the selfish one here?
@@jayahmoore7251the person was just pointing out the obvious misuse of the word 'love'. They weren't attacking the lady in the video. Making all kinds of negative assumptions about someone & voicing them does no one any good.
I often think maybe I might be a sociopath, but disguised. People have always said how "empathetic and understanding", blah, blah, blah I am...but truth is is that I feel nothing for anyone (the exception being animals or babies/toddlers), but I understand how you're supposed to act or what to say in any given situation because of picking up on other people's social skills/habits. Everything you said was spot on. Also diagnosed with CPTSD, so maybe life fucked me up. 😂
It must be easy to feel nothing for others often times I become envious of ppl who can't feel because when things go wrong with my family or son it causes me a great deal of sadness and pain. And I just wish for one second I could turn it all off but unfortunately that's not the way God created me and I know it's better to bond with ppl and love ppl rather than feel nothing so I thank.god at the end of the day
Go get tested. I did and I was right about my diagnosis. I have bpd, but I'm also high on the aspd spectrum, as well as the npd one. I have empathy, but it's very selective. I am also a sadist, but that's also selective. Getting a confirmation on my diagnosis and traits is pretty nice, and of course tickles my narcissism. I feel like it's good to know what's going on inside your brain/mind. Well, maybe you don't care enough, but my curiosity is too strong.
As another with ASPD (a psychopath here since I was just born fun I guess), thanks for explaining it better than I ever could. One Life Pro Tip though: if you ever marry, marry another ASPD-person. They won't expect things you cannot deliver. My husband does not get offended by anything I do, and vice versa. It helps us both to relax at home.
I completely understand that some people can have no empathy, but as someone who is TOO empathetic i don't understand how people could not have empathy, but it's just because being too empathetic is all I've known, sometimes i cry during movies when they're not even sad 🤣😭 and i absolutely cannot watch someone being tortured in a movie
Im.glad I'm an empath there are to many sociopaths nowadays and narcissist it's quite sad honestly we've as a whole have failed in every aspect of life :(
I once dated what I suspect was a sociopath. The amount of lying and manipulation and possessiveness was incredible. Glad I just realized it very early and got out as early as I could. My thinking was that the longer I keep it going the more she will want to keep “her trophy”. No thanks…
I’m a psychopath and I just realized why its easy to control sociopaths. I don’t care about validation. I dont need someone to listen to my rants, reply back to me, etc. If him/her arent supporting my goal then they should be out-of-sight and out-of-mind. Sociopaths and narcs have a predictable playbook. I recognize them quickly but they think I am neurotypical. I either dont waste my time or I make them clean my kitchen.
The way that people with cluster B personality disorders talk sometimes it's so hard to understand how the things you do and say actually work. It just seems so easy to see. I am so curious to meet a sociopath or a psychopath in real life without getting that feeling that something is "off" or at least different.
I want to know something why do psychopaths have a tendency to over exaggerate their stories ? Whenever someone who is a sociopath/psychopath/narcissist talks about themselves or experiences they always make it seem like irs some great achievement like for litteraly every little thing and if you guys have "ever" lost in life you never talk about it
This isnt "love," this is trauma. "Let me abuse you over and over again." Be my punching bag, a remedy for my trauma, and i will "love" you. No thanks!
Some quack doctor tried to diagnose me with this disorder and I ran it by my therapist and the woman didn’t even know what anti social personality disorder was. She straight up said that it probably had to do with being antisocial and me staying home since I’m always by myself. I didn’t bother correcting her because if I did I would’ve been mean AF cus how are you a therapist and you don’t know this? That has nothing to do with being antisocial, it’s either you are a sociopath or a psychopath 🤦🏽♀️ I’m so sick of the people I’m dealing with in court and the foolish classes they are trying to force me to do to waste my MFing time on BS around Zombified people. They don’t need to be ordering anyone to do anything when they are this misinformed and stupid. I wonder sometimes if these people just printed their credentials of the web or they cheated their way to their position 😒I don’t even bother correcting people anymore, because at this point it’s freaking annoying, and draining, because either they are playing stupid to see if I’m stupid, or they genuinely are stupid.
That's cuz in order to get into personality disorders let alone SPECIALIZE with ASPD you need to diverge from the typical clinical psychotherapy route...
I can empathize with others but i don't have to or necessarily feel their emotions. i don't understand this. i do consider myself an empath but not because i can feel others emotions but because i can put myself in their shoes and understand how they could be suffering or dealing with something.
Sympathy = I can understand your perspective, but I’m not currently in that situation, so I can’t feel the same as you in order to bond during this moment. However, I still can provide comfort. Empathy = I get your perspective AND I share that feeling, either because I’m experiencing that situation now or have in the past. I can also provide comfort.
I was born empath in a narcissistic sodioparh family. I choose love but in my 50s ic shut down and now knew how it feels to be a docisopath . Irs a survived response. I believe everyone needs love my sister is aggrieve paranoid and narcissistic but iv always loved her it's difficultbeing an empath.
Sociopaths do have empathy and emotion but not to the degree of normal people. Psychopaths on the other hand don't have no emotions nor empathy but not the same for Sociopaths.
Exactly. The way she described it, IT IS empathy. It just happens that she's big on RECIPROCATION. And I honestly think that's a pretty healthy quality to have as a human being, especially when you are looking for a partner. We all need someone who fills our cup and who we will willingly do the same for without feeling starved 🤷♀️
People like yourself need to Stick to your own kind. Either way you are both gonna have a toxic relationship. Why not do it together. Leave the ones that can feel alone
I just want to ask who will stay to handle the rage and depression ? I personaly doubt a narcissist/sociopath or psycopath would stay because we all know how toxic the sociopathic rage and depression can get and all these three always make sure they have the "upper hand" in relationsips. May i ask are sociopaths dependent on empaths for supply like narcissists are ? Or can sociopaths survive solo and if they can why not opt to live a solo life ?
Based on her video I think that her point is "I don't need other people, but when I find someone who can tolerate me, I keep them because I want them around me."
She is a narcopath (assuming “narcopath” means narc+ASPD, rather than just being a narcissist), she’s said that she’s been diagnosed with ASPD and NPD.
To me it sounds like the worst thing ever like a fusion of a narco and a psychopath that not even the devil wanted in hell. But you're probably not talking about those people.
@@cvdirecto5008 I meant to say what she described sounds easier than being with a narcopath. I corrected my autocorrect mistakes. So yes I agree, the worst kind of human. If you can call them that.
Fck that. That means i have no authentic self, And need to serve one person 24/7. Because that person doens't have empathy and will defently hurt you. It's toxic unhealthy and traumatizing for life. Nothing easy about it.
‘The rage and depression under my mask’…..interesting statement. Does that mean that you are an unhappy person? Do you ever feel real joy? I sincerely feel sorry for you if that’s the case.
That sounds like empathy to me. It just so happens that you're big on reciprocation, and I think that's pretty HEALTHY. More people should really do their best to give AND take. A lot of the givers out there just keep on goving and giving out of self-righteousness, pity, or trauma-bonding and then end up getting abused. If more people understand that a "transactional" relationship can be seen as more than just a materialistic approach-- that it can be seen as a "complimentary" approach, too in terms of fullfiling each other in different aspects in a partnership, wouldn't the world become a better place?
I’m wondering if sociopaths have love or empathy for animals? I know they don’t care about humans so I’m curious about how they feel surrounding animals.
Actually, this is the same to Aquarius...I mean, I am Aquarius myself. But because I am an empath and more on spiritual level, sometimes I realized that when I only have Aquarius in my chart, I will be just like this. So someone diagnosed as this will have the lack of something. When it comes to zodiac charts, it will may lack of something too, or maybe there's just a shift of life paths or number paths. So for me, it's okay, I love your videos btw, Mam.
I wonder with age if you develop empathy. Most young people are self absorbed but as they age and suffer they begin to empathize. A brain can rewire with time and effort.
I have a big question for you author...I study psychology...does your condition allow you to know obviously right from wrong, but does it allow you to see what you are referring to as a problem, and do you work on it by actually not hurting others or being an empathetic the best you can, even acting ? I was wondering if a person once they know what they are doing and knowing it's wrong, if u continuously do it? Some it's psychological so u can't tell I know, but what u're speaking about right now for example..do u take into consideration others while knowing this info?
I have antisocial personality disorder also they gave me this diagnosis when i was 17 in the psych hospital never realized i was a sociopath until i watched your videos
That’s not love. True love can only happen in freedom. The fact that you value those who can take your destructive behavior is simply attachment, which is conditional, quite opposite to love. If true love can only happen in freedom and freedom can only be within a just environment, then you have to be committed to truth(not just what’s true to you) and that’s why you need empathy…to know the truth of the other person’s world, so that you can respect his/her justice. Feeling what the other is feeling is not empathy, it’s being an empath and that’s a spiritual gift, so not everyone has to have it. This is why it’s wrong to take pride from mental disorders…only true love can make order and we have a system of justice so that we can love one another, truthfully.
Empathy quite literally means the ability to understand or share feelings with others. It’s not a supernatural ability it’s something people either have or don’t. Lower rates of empathy are actually a diagnostic criteria for autism as well. Are you saying people with autism can’t love? I think this is a very narrow minded comment but I could be misunderstanding what you’re trying to say. I have scored very low on every test I have taken in regards to empathy but I love very deeply. I just can’t put myself in someone else shoes or understand their emotions but that doesn’t make me incapable of love.
Yeah, she stated in another video that for her love is conditional. Spit on observation, and in this video, she mentioned relationships being transactional.
Borderline here. I’m sure you know there’s great research about trauma and recovery for us cluster bees. Do you believe people with ASPD and NPD can heal from their disorders like some borderlines do?
Seems less dysfunctional than borderline. BPD is more like loving people because the people are seen as the parent, and there's the flipping from attachment to detachment because of how the parent can cause harm. I'd rather be a sociopath than a borderline. The brain and nervous system feel like a child. Basically stuck as a child, needing a parent to attach to, but detach if they make me feel bad. My awareness of this makes me isolate and avoid people because I don't want to put this dysfunction onto anyone.
As irrational as it sounds, I would also prefer sociopathy any day than borderline. Borderline constantly hurts and the lack of empathy from aspd sounds like a vacation to me.
I agree. I feel like especially petulant BPD is much harder to manage for everyone involved. ASPD just doesn't seem as hateful, aggressive and unpredictable.
I did one of those personality quizzes. It said that I was an empath with psychopathic tendencies. I feel you, but I have a turn off switch. I am not a relationship person. But I love hard. Or maybe it's push the wrong button then I don't give a feck lol 😆
It’s interesting to how people with aspd react on drugs like mdma/lsd, My empathy reaches roof when I’m on it. I had one narcissist “friend” that once took 300ug of acid and it just put her on her knees..
I genuinely have a question you mentioned that you have cognitive empathy so does that mean you understand empathy and choose not to let it affect you or are you actually incapable of feeling empathy for others.
I don’t have ASPD, atleast I don’t think I do, I love animals and feel so much empathy for them, but I genuinely can’t care or feel empathy for other people ig I have super misanthropic values but I do want to care sometimes, it just doesn’t happen. It gets so fucking annoying because I’m Taoist and I fully believe in it, one of the main things in Taoism is being kind to others. But I can’t tell when I’m hurting them, I don’t understand people’s emotions, if I broke up with someone I’d just not think about it. It’s kind of funny because I care for my online friends probably more than I care for my family. Idrk if I’m on the spectrum of aspd, I don’t feel remorse but I’m not violent and I’m kind of good at manipulation. My parents think I’m a schizoid but idrk 😭 idek why I’m commenting this.
@@Cynistrelle I'm ASD, I have heap loads of "empathy" in the sens that I feel other ppls emotions intensely.. yet I still think in this transactional way.. interesting to find similarities with ASPDs :)
I mean, imo you’re not wrong to a certain degree. When it comes down to it, relationships are always on some level transactional. The way I see it, Psychopathy/Sociopathy is just more cut & dry about it. But for example, it’s not like the average healthy NT person would unconditionally love someone who hurts them over and over again. At some point*, the average person has to be like “I don’t feel good about this anymore. I gotta go.”it’s the healthy thing to do. I have the over-empathy type of autism. So I’ll put up with more BS than I should. But with age, I’ve realized I can’t UNCONDITIONALLY practice love for someone. For my narc ex-best friend, I wish them happiness, but I can’t love them loyally and wholly the way I used to because of what they’ve done to me.
But don’t you just use people then ditch them? So what could they possibly do to bring value to you that you would care about enough to love them. I thought sociopaths feel they owe nothing to anyone .
