The Complete Adventures of the Videogame Agent (Compilation) 

"Hey, Star Wars Battlefront. You're a beloved licensed franchise that made up many 2000's kids' childhoods. We're just gonna take away everything that's great about you and pump you to the brim with microtransactions."

@@Reagan1984 swb: "what why?" EA: "because money is life amigo"

EA: Hey Peashooter! Peashooter: What? EA: You know how PopCap sold a lot of copies of your game? Peashooter: Yeah? EA: Well now, we'll make you and everyone and everything you know ugly and butcher you with microtransactions. Peashooter: Wait what? EA: Published! Peashooter: NOOOOOOOOOO!

Rappin' Ronnie Reagan game is dope now though...but the launch was atrocious

@@clintfreudbacher5406 what's it like in the pasture, sheep?

He's a shitty agent, not a bad agent, there's a difference.

He's a shitty person/agent but has ideas that work with execution

Shup up hatty

That's the joke yes.

then the advice really wouldn't be shitty then would it ??

His lines are fucking amazing

@@user-dw6uk9kz9q ikr 😂

Mark you’re a shitty agent

Yep and it worked! Well... then they made her chest small in mk11 and for whatever reason made her face wide

"Mark, you're a shitty agent."

It would be cool

Duval In The Wall nope, he’s the one giving Kevin his assistant jobs

If Mark the Agent Had an Assistant Kev-Win, Snidekick, UnderKev, Assistant Piss-ant -- "Ah, uh...excuse me, Mark, but this is NOT your time. I'M the one trying to fix YOUR mistakes, take a seat." Riiiight! Slap it on me, Kevmeister, give it to me straight, lay the cards on the table, spill the -- "You done? Yes? Great. So, it says here on your record that every single Player 1 you've had as a client has given you a one-star rating. The amount of complaints in this file is UNBELIEVABLE!" Hey, gotta stick it to you Broster, the world's a pretty harsh place, it's all dog-eat-dog out there, I gotta tell 'em how it is! We gotta think of those ratings, and boy lemme tell ya, it's been through the roof for every client ever since my -- "I'm gonna have to go ahead and disagree with you there." *Shoves phone with Wikipedia tabs open showing retro game ratings into Mark's face* how on EARTH do you explain this? Have you learned NOTHING from all these failures?!" Not really pickin' up what you're puttin' down, fancy pants, but from what I saw -- "You must have been huffing grass the entire time, then! Think about it! After Sonic 3, you threw out and disgraced the name of his sidekick who LITERALLY HAD THE POWER TO F*CKING FLY!!! And for what?! Attitude?!" Don't you realize that's what the generation was looking for? Response was pretty positive -- "Positively in the hole, that's for sure. And of course you HAD to include sexism in the Metroid series, couldn't just stop with the encouraging message about girls having strength too! Did you not realize that the audience you were feeding a photo of Samus in a bathing suit was MORE THAN HALF PREPUBESCENT KIDS?! Notice how Nintendo redirected EVERY lawsuit over to you? Wonder why THAT happened!" Couldn'ta been that bad back in those days! After all, you know the general concensus, video games are NOT the cause of today's problems -- "Next up, how about Donkey Kong's family? Pretending Cranky Kong was a serial kidnapping murderer sure took a toll on that guy's life! He's racked up quite a defamation lawsuit! All you had to do was insert him into the story in a nice, quiet backup manner for the new generation like Nintendo had to step in and do! That company's been scrambling to clean up your garbage for years, even still to this day! It's no wonder every gaming company you've ever worked for has thrown you out! Gonna have no trouble paying all of this, Mr. Haven't-Had-Work-In-Five-and-a-Half-Years?!" Now look, sure there's gonna be a few critics out there who have to dump on the decisions of the top guys -- "You're NOT the top guy anymore! You haven't been for over half a decade! Is anything I'm saying even getting to you? Hey, you -- PUT THAT RESET BUTTON AWAY! God, I swear, I can't even believe all those heroes were able to defeat their respective villains after all your interference!" Like, the bad guys don't seem to be having any trouble nowadays, gotta be current, my man! Since I've been fired, things have been going downhill for all the Player 1s! Seriously, how can nobody take my side on that? "That's because I've been helping the villains myself! Only good guy I helped was Ganon, but there's some weird thing about parallel universes I don't wanna get into. Look, Mark, you're not cut out to be a video game agent. I'm supposed to be helping the bad guys here, so...whattaya know...have you ever tried...maybe working at a deli or something? I know a good one in Beige Town that you might be able to join to pick yourself back up. You'll be under the instruction of the best sandwich guy in the whole region, Rusty. I'm gonna set you up an application right now." Great, back to the Nintendudes! I can see it now: Rusty! White Eyes! Squeakster! Alvin and the Pokémunks! Complete Psychopath, what's the deal my man? Your Pokemon skills are burning about as hot as Articuno in the middle of Chrono Trigger's ice age! You need guidance, kid, and I'm the guy who's gonna rocket you straight up to the -- "THIS...is going to be the most impossible job I've ever had."

Bro Lmao this is brilliant Think Mark needed some more stupid zingers in there but fair enough Although if Kevin wants to help the agent, he’s confirming that the agent is a villain lol

I wonder why he would quit

True

By the power of satire the agent is born

six six five... aaaaaaand six six six. Perfect.

@@chaoticsilver8442 not anymore

You must be a commie. Stop playing games financed by evil corporate people, like ALL GAMES THAT YOU PLAY. Virtue Signaling Numbskull.

This gave me a chuckle, nice!

"We gotta start smaller, work our way up". Wethepeople: Okay, can we at least get more pokemon rusty or the character assistant?

Not sure if I should laugh or cry.

@@unknowndane4754 Didn't you mean... A shuckle? I'll see myself out

@@Filsaveol Heheh, yeaahh!!!...Shuckle!...Heh, heh...

Geico

Well at least we can save 15 or on geico

Or if he's in human forme and correcting me.

Dorkly

You could save 15 percent or more on car insurance

Nooooo, real shit?

I heard he left for college humor too

Why wouldn't he have an understudy???

Aaron Smith You know this is a youtube channel right

Isn't murph the voice for mark?

Well at least he works with his dad.

@@deathsdoor07That's good atleast

@@chaznelson6865 but does he know?

@@jayjaws2478 nah I think it's a rule Pokemon trainers have to be fatherless 🤣

@@OptimumTaurus Still can't believe that Gary's parents canonically died in a car crash.

I mean, everyone did really. The game series shown probably wouldn’t exist if it weren’t for him.

Samus too.

Ms. Majumdar, you killed my best agent

Still no Half life 3 yet tho

Not sonic

Now all we need is for Kratos to get this guy as his agent.

WHAT!!!!!!!!!!

OH SNAP YOU'RE RIGHT. Agent actually did him a solid XD

Who said they used the same actor? I mean Gex himself cant physically devolve.

@@Mikman360 lol ikr

I wonder how much he's getting paid

Mer Williamson Assistant Kevin: *AM I A JOKE TO YOU?*

Dude’s like 8-bit Saul Goodman

Gabriel Rodriguez Probably a lot.

@@TheEmpiresStrongest definitely more than I get paid

Technically, every company abuses sidekicks.

Hey your profile picture is the pig from the seven deadly sins

The Meaning Of Life yup

yeah

Mark Prosper Yeah, and he needs to be kicked in both sides, if you catch my drift.

stanj85 it aint so

But, I want to see more of this guy! I want to see him become Kratos's agent! And Lara Croft's. And maybe possibly the agent of Solid snake and Spyro.

Charmander has been around for over 20 years, so we should keep seeing the Agent for 20 more years, if Dorkly doesn't kick it.

stanj85 he's one of my favorites cuz he sucks at his job. And exploits people's hopes and dreams. Ain't the internet wonderful?

me too

JuicyHotz Gaming Care to explain the joke?

@@onerandombruh Lizard for GEICO.

Except the lizard is s gecko for GEICO

Shy Torres Totally clear now... Thanks for your valuable help!!

Geckos brother the other ten percent of. Coolness bling bling lol

Lmao 😂😂😂💀 love that part

*not ringing a bell at all*

My name is Gex, and THIS is Gex Ruins Everything.

Bruh that one killed me 😂

Statutory apeist

But it's true... ...Sup?

just saw it XD

You really can't teach that tho 🤣

@@OptimumTaurus I mean yeah, he does have a lot of attitude

Master Chief Solid Snake Doomguy Pikachu NiGHTS Conker Banjo and Kazooie

The Ryder twins Shadow the hedgehog Konami

Published it by accident before it was done. Now it's done.

Yes

So kratos, My man, your last game did wonders, but it was clearly tossed aside by Red Dead Redemption. So now is your time to shine and take back your victory. Kratos: so we’re gonna kill more gods, bang more women and have crazy, mindless boss fights? Agent: love the enthusiasm, but we’re thinkin a different route. Tell me what you think of parenthood? Kratos: I had no parents and I killed my family Agent: great, cause we need you to suck at it as you try to have a second go at it. Kratos: but... my entire franchise is based off of my vengeance in their name. Agent: oh yeah, about that. No vengeance anymore Kratos: WHAT!? Agent: yeah, you’re a pacifist who happens to be a shitty father. Kratos: this can’t get any worse... Agent: grab your bags, we’re flying to Norway

The thing is, in many industry's I think this attitude of his works. It's autopilot (Essential when you have so many conversations in a day), it leaves not much room for debate, and despite you feeling like he's trying to be sly but failing, at the end of the conversation you'll have ended up where he talked you into

Who's Dengar?

Lsvsha snap snap not click click

*GENIUS*

@@Kudmipm yes thank you I just read this 😭

Mark Prosper and Kirby eats him

Dorkly staff actually responds to your questions on their site quite often, I asked about the posibility of bringing the agent back, waaaaaaay back in the day they were making the final season of Rusty, they told me that the guy who voiced him is no longer at dorkly and they don't want to replace his voice as it's pretty Iconic, so there's little hope for a comeback

Omar Reyes Damn that's too bad

make him meet fox from starfox

And Pearl and Marina?

agreed. love this.

😈

I don't like it

@@PelozoF exactly

I like it

Love it!

GreaterStark Yooooooo! This dude has not a care in the world! Just too cool for school. 😆

My favorite line lol

when i heard that I almost died laughing

I mean he did kidnap Pauline.

had me in tears

I don't think jonny cage would agree with you

Mark is a terrible agent!.... please bring him back!

@@amyschildgamerlive4519 I mean, the dude’s ideas gave birth to iconic characters and franchises, so is he really that bad?

@@jackdaone6469 he's also responsible for some terrible changes too lol

Yes luxra yes

Carload and friends as well he should

Yes for adding some ____ content in games I think u understand the dash If u don't just fill it up the word u want

When did he get fired?

Luxra I hope not! He's boss!

Kinda ruined sonic's

No. He ruined them

@@imanoahhunter3530 Nope.

@@imanoahhunter3530 marios? "charmanders"?

@@deadchannel2468 actually he can mega evolve now and Mario is getting back to its old self apart from paper jam. As for sonic. Just look at the movie he is sooooooooooooooo been ruined.

Magma Productions "Speak softly and carry a big stick, by big stick I mean crowbar and by speak softly I mean speak never" lmao

How does Drake from Drake of the 99 dragons meets his agent sound to you?

David3 X YES!!!!!!

I definately wanna see one for Master Chief Meets His Agent.

Luke Mitchell Ooh, that's a good one! Make it happen Dorkly!

David3 X awesome.....ly terrible. Hate his face,hope he dies and is reborn as a ghost type pokemon so I can BRUTALly SWING my fist into his brain pan. .... .... ....I'm uh... joking.... but that still got dark......

Favorite line in the whole thing 😂

RedVIII yeah they should

RedVIII totally :)

Murray is still there I think

The voice actor is Mike Trapp from Collegehumor.

RedVIII Adam Conover is Gex and Johnny Cage

@Random Nerd your right. Samus is Donkey Kong Then Donkey Kong is Samus

What about Fire Emblem waifus

You forgot the greatest that is lusamine

Bayonetta: Sorry, what were you saying?

@@roy_mezz-awake2470 technically Bayonetta is a Sega character

I’m confused

@@TrickedGecko327 foot fetish

LightningGecko327 you’re too innocent

LightningGecko327 It’s nothing like these guys make it out to be, it’s just that on the ending screen of the first Metroid game, when you beat the game fast enough you see Samus in a bikini, but she still has her boots on. It’s not a foot fetish thing, it’s weird game design.

@@TrickedGecko327 Charteon I was thinking that at first, that she's still wearing boots in metroid, but there must be more than that, because why is he then saying that is confirmation that she's going to become fat? I'm inclined to think it is a reference to the term "barefoot and pregnant", like he thinks she's saying she'll not be getting barefoot when she gets pregnant?

Dyed her hair, guys dig blonde bomb shells, now let's talk latex

She is now. Not originally

It would have been cool if one of her costumes in Smash Ultimate turned her hair brown, as a nod to her debut design.

she is

dustinb42 same

Logically speaking, since the agent is talking to characters BEFORE their claim to fame games and is named Mark, and Kevin helps fix the already failed strategies of the villains, this would mean it couldn't be an older Kevin. However, with that being said Kevin could be a more jaded version of the agent, who after dropping his old identity as Mark could be seeking to set up the villains for success instead of the heroes I got bored :p

Knodsil your profile pic goes perfect with the comment

Agentcepcion

Now I have a way for my sexuality before it was lizard fucker

Is there a bowl of two apples and a banana on the cabinet in the background? A little innuendo, eh?

Umm look at your likes

The XD kills it

Gecktial INTERCOURSES

Eric Cartman you have to pay for a hat and cappy upgrade and stuff

To watch the video, you can either grind loot boxes for 300 hours, or pay 25 bucks

You'd need to pay RU-vid Premium to see that video.

Pay to jump or run.

Already happened and how would you like to star in your own game

same

so re-released of stuff they already made to make more money off no additional effort?

Lordpiecrust no, they just made a collection/compilation video of him

so rereleasing the same content again

well if you want Dorkly TM Agent The Move, here it is.

Mark Prosper YES

He doesn't have a game

WALUIGI: Put me in Smash VIDEO AGENT: That's none of my fucking business. WALUIGI: Welp, I tried. *WALUIGI asks MASAHIRO SAKURAI for the 1000th time * M. SAKURAI: I SAID NO TO YOU FOR 18 FUCKING YEARS. STOP IT, ASSHOLE. WALUIGI: Wah. Its not me. Its the pression of my fans. M. SAKURAI: DON'T GIVE ME THAT SHIT

Mateo's Gameplays Waluigi has existed for 18 years.

Chris Johnson I wasnt certain of his age at the time of writing the comment

Now all we need is Lara Croft meets with her agent. And a new Gex game would be nice.

NO, NO it is NOT

yeah it is

NO IT IS NOT!!! NOTHING INTERESTING HAPPENS (and quite frankly it is a little pervy)

deadpool crossover worthy

He died

Just the apeosite. Also, STFU Hatty!

Hey, look, one's finally been announced! ❤

*YES*

Kinky dong

chrinkly shlong

Dongly knog

deadpool crossover worthy

If Kaptain K Rool Had an Assistant So Kevin, how's that jungle area doing? Donkey and Diddy will never get past the fearsome Klumps in there! "Um, not so good, actually, King." Hmm? Why not, Kevin? I set everything up properly-- "Yeeaah...the very first thing the monkeys find is a DK barrel to ensure that they're both partnered *right from the start,* and you didn't even bother snatching that 1-up balloon from Donkey's house out there! Did I mention there's about four hundred of them floating all over the island, by the way?" But...but all my threatening Kremlings shall surely destroy those monkeys before they even reach them, right? "Yeah, no. Did you realize Donkey and Diddy can jump, and for some odd reason, MORE THAN HALF OF THE F*CKING KREMLINGS CAN'T?! The only ones that do are those blue moon gravity alligators that take so long to land that those monkeys can just walk right under them! And NOT ONE of your baddies out there even bothers to chase after Donkey and Diddy after they pass them. I mean, literally, if a SINGLE ONE of those muscle-bound creatures bothered to give active pursuit, and try damaging them in some other way than just walking into them, they'd dismember that duo in five seconds!" What about the pair of Klumps in the first level? Surely it'd be pretty difficult to get past that! "Nope, even though Diddy can't jump on them, he can literally just cartwheel through them both for whatever odd reason. Right now he and Donkey are flying a giant ostrich through the snowy mountains, laughing their butts off as they get closer and closer to your ship." Um. "Don't forget, even though Diddy can't beat Krushas, well, who cares, he can just jump over them too, not to mention all the oddly Mario-esque easily jumpable gaps in THIS world!" Mario-who? "Never mind, different story. And WHY did you put all these extra animal buddy crates and bananas out here for them to collect as well as LETTERS that ALSO give them extra lives?!" Well, "Not to mention the fact that your ship has several cannons strung up pointing down, to fire cannonballs straight at the main deck. Why?!" To smash the Kongs when they get here, of course! There's no way they'll escape iron cannonballs raining down on their heads-- "And there's no way your ship can possibly survive ONE of those cannonballs falling on its deck. I mean, this wood here is so old anyway! Like, twenty-three years old, it looks like! Every step I take creaks out here. You'll sink your ship in half a minute trying to kill those monkeys!" Um...so what would you suggest, Kevin? "Already taken care of the problem. They're about to reach the huge beaver at the glacier, so I ordered every enemy on the island, as well as all the bosses, to assemble there. They'll pick apart Donkey and Diddy as soon as they get there *static* huh? Oh, hey, giant bee man. What? The Kongs have been completely...uh...yeah, thanks, I don't need the gory details. Well, Kaptain, looks like the island's all yours. Guess you should get to work grabbing all those bananas and adding them to your stolen horde now like you should have done in the first place." Huh. Perhaps I'm not fit to rule this island after all.

"Love the enthusiasm! *Never gonna happen!* 😃" ...The voice actor left Dorkly years ago

@@GamesPerJustin 😥

New head cannon now

ma man just wrote the whole script for the next video bruh.

Why doesn't this have more likes?

I died at "and by Elvis, I mean done."

I was so wishing this would happen

It’s not all bad. Banjo and Kazooie would eventually return to Nintendo via Smash Ultimate

“nO, wHy?”

that sounds awesome

TheKpa11 *T H E A G E N T M E E T S H I S A G E N T*

If he had an agent, he wouldn't be an aaaagent now would he, he'd be a client. I'm gonna LVL with you, do some grinding with you, a little bit of some co-operaaation... you need me more than I need you, now let's talk money

By making life of others shit. We'll miss you.

I like to think the agent became the CEO of EA, left with a golden parachute and is now retired.

That is fucking hilarious😂🤣

@@neotale8228 slow down dude xD

Joseph T . Whycome it's the agents end. Did i miss somerthing?

i hope not

Harmoni Jarvis I am confused. Folks say he's history like there is some news floating about that i haven't heard.

Preston Clark nah he left an his voice was to iconic so they wont replace him :'(

Poopi and that agent meets his agent

Nah, it should be Simon Belmont meets his agent.

/\ (Illuminati Confirmed.) /_ _\