The Dark Truth Of  

Men are taught how to treat a woman but women aren't taught how to treat a man.

The link at the end there is for yesterday's Jordan Peterson interview

I'm still not entirely convinced though that the stuff against Weinstein came about naturally. I mean, sure, he was a nasty piece of shit, but with him so many other producers and directors in the movie industry. This has been going on for ages and is still going on today (nobody now just again dares to talk about it, but everyone in the industry knows it). I don't think this was about women, I think this was about getting the movie industry to change towards the lefties and progressives (tHe MeSsAgE), and Weinstein was just an obstacle in their way that would by no means allow any of that crap to happen, so they had to get rid of him. Any guesses to why Hollywood movies have ben absolute 'the message' dogshite ever since he's gone?...

Lots of comments on false accusations which are awful and life destroying. Helpful to know the facts though to understand where and why Believe women started. Its estimated that only around 1% of sexual assaults are reported to police, this is a combination of both the likely scenario that the woman knew the man and also that the justice system dosnt typically convict for rape or assault. Of those 1% reported, only around 1.3% will result in a conviction. The wait time for cases is also one of the longest and the process of collecting evidence very dehumanizing for woman. False accusations, while horrible, are only between 3-5% of reported. Believe women came about as by doing so you have a 95% chance of being on the right side, supporting a woman that was likely assaulted through a system that wont likely get her justice. It was effectively trying to balance the system. What we have to decide is is it worse for the current statistics to continue, with 99% of women not reporting cases and 99% of the 1% accused going free, or to support women. This is in no way supporting Trial by media with little evidence, but it is to encourage at least starting from a place of empathy for the accuser until evidence is presented. Hope that helps the conversation

What she is missing is that the Chads don't give a damned and they get rewarded as a result. On the other hand, the actual good guys end up being pushed aside and discarded. This leaves those women even more bitter and the good men ever more isolated. Like with Feminism, women do not know when to stop and always push things too far. ALWAYS...

What's strange is that I always hear this is diminishingly rare, but I hear about it all the time, I know people it's happened to, everyone I know knows people it's happened to. I strongly suspect it's not nearly as rare as they're trying to portray.

Not that simple. There do need to be consequences and checks and balances but... there's also the very real danger of creating a feedback loop where legitimately assaulted women could become afraid of coming forth due to fear of being imprisoned.

​@@jackroman8821strong and independent, except when it comes to reporting a crime, and so fragile that being afraid of not being believed is sufficient to convince you out of it.

@@puddintame6310 Feminists push the obviously bogus statistic that only 2% or rape allegations are false. The problem is that very few false accusers are ever prosecuted and convicted because their victims are almost always just glad they were proved innocent and do not want to spend any more time in the legal system.

3 times? Whom are you hanging out with?

just wondering, what race(s) involved?

I'd always assume 'relationship talk' (or interaction) in such situation. whatever wolves about to feed selves.

A couple summers ago this guy I know that's pretty jacked happend across a couple having a fight and putting hands on each other. This friend of mine is a white knight kinda guy (still, even though he's over 50) decides he's gonna kinda step in and calm shit down. He gets punched in the face, giant black eye, and the girls started freaking out on him. All of a sudden the couple were no longer adversaries, now they teamed up to make my buddy the bad guy. No cops involved. He's telling me this at work and I'm checking out his blackeye and I was already red pilled and I was like - Don't be a White Knight, did you learn something? (rhetorical). And when/if women start getting assaulted more and men don'e step in, you know they're gonna be on the news bawling her eyes out going "There were all these men nearby and no one did anything!"

She was the guys boyfriend?

Absolutely agree thought I was helping a woman being beaten jumped in and stopped the beating only to have her walk by me the next day calling me bad

The UK has become a complete joke. Really sorry to hear about your friend.

whats his name? or local paper name?

If you're a man and you actively choose to stay in the UK, I have zero sympathy for you. I don't care about excuses like my family is here

Just another day in the “patriarchy”

​@@OscarPatronThat's what I want to know.

Do you not realise that there are 'zero consequences' for most rapists, too? Prosecuting every victim whose rapist walks free, on the ignorant assumption that she was lying, would be ignorant and abusive. There's already enough pressure on women who are raped to be the 'perfect victim', i.e. to be completely sober, to be dressed conservatively and to fight back and get even more badly injured by the rapist, when the instinct of most women is to freeze. Thus, a rape trial is far more a trial of the victim than the accuser. It shouldn't fall on women to take all the precautions - even decent men could do with being more responsible when it comes to choosing who to sleep with. As Jordan Peterson says, sex is not a casual thing. It's time that people stopped pretending that it is. This is something that men could take the lead on - discussing consent explicitly would make most women feel much safer. And while they're at it, according to a recent study, men have slapped, spat on or choked women under the age of 40 against their will, in otherwise consensual encounters. The men doing this SERIOUSLY need to stop.

​@@lavienestpasunlongfleuvetr2559 😂😂

So you're saying, if a woman falsely accuses your dad, brother, husband or son of sexual assault, rape, etc, destroyed their livelihood, reputation and mental health, there shouldn't be any consequences or justice for the the accuser?@@lavienestpasunlongfleuvetr2559

@@lavienestpasunlongfleuvetr2559 Well done for completely ignoring what he said and making it about you.

Women get away with murder all the time!

That's why libel laws exist

False accusers have always been a thing just like real victims not being believed.

Look at all the celebs and athletes with loads of money to fight back in the media and courts and even then they get ruined

I’d go so far as to say lying and manipulating are the primary ways a woman hurts someone. Its rare they reach for violence as a first resort, thats traditionally the realm of men. The fact that there are ideologies and attitudes in society that will ignore this fact means that women who wish to do harm are allowed to run rampant with little to no consequences. In days gone by a women with malicious intent had to concern herself with whether a man might respond in a male-typical way. Something i DO NOT condone but i suspect this provided a counterbalance to such behavior in past eras. However given that our societies have made illegal violence of this nature, thank goodness, this means women who wish to cause harm in female-typical ways are effectively protected while men are basically hamstrung. They may only defend themselves with words which does little to actually protect them from these women and the harm their actions cause. End result is a seemingly rash explosion of unchecked female-typical malevolence which, until recently, was tamped down by various factors.

@@r.walker7986 you are correct but what has changes is the way men are just guilty in the court of public opinion with nothing but an accusation and hes ruined for years if not life.

Watch Brooklyn 99. Gina regularly harassed Terry and it was treated as a joke but they consistently tip-toe around the subject when the sexes of the characters were reversed.

@stevenhighams4190 It is the (general) difference in strength between women and men that makes this an aggressive (and vulgar) come-on when coming from a woman but sexual harassment when coming from a man.

​@@mademoiselledusfonctionell1609 you know that's bs, right? Physical strength has nothing to do with it. Sexual harassment is unwanted advances. Nothing about power. So if a man harasses a woman without touching her, then it's fine? Using physical strength as an excuse for double standards is silly. It's like allowing men to behave badly because women have periods and say "oh it's the general differences in women having hormonal changes. That's why it's bad when they do it to men but not the other way around". It sounds stupid, no? Same with the strength argument. It's used to justify this bad behaviour

@@FleetingDream755 The difference being that unwanted sexual advances are very, very unlikely to be dangerous in one direction, while quite frequently dangerous in the other.

@@mademoiselledusfonctionell1609 danger isn't part of it. Sexual assault is when you make sexual advances on an unwilling person. Danger, size, hair color... They're all irrelevant

Some of the most hateful woman in existence are teachers!

I have had very few bad male teachers. Almost all of the female teachers I had were terrible at their jobs. I would hate to be a kid in public schools nowadays.

I hope Ashley has remained the same

Teacher was angry becos u didn't play the game with her....😂

"not one of them thought about it properly" they are not big on thinking

Women never think properly.

What about female sexual predators?

When u hear their story, its just having regrets or most cases their ego being dragged cause the guy was ‘too ugly’ for her.

Even if nothing ever happened to them which is the vast majority they claim to be a victim because it's hip

My only useful advice, is that you don't really need to approach women. Make yourself interesting and desirable, and women will present themselves to you. Now, you need to not be so stupid as to ignore when they do that, but it's pretty obvious. Work on yourself, and the women you work with, socialize with, and casually know will notice.

​@@aarondimoff5180garbage advice. Dont date coworkers, fellow students, or even gym goers unless your ok with potentially losing your job/education/gym, ect.

Same here. I’m 55 and I never approached a girl. I once asked a girl to dance but that’s it. (She said no). I was probably 30-40y ahead of everybody else by taking feminist ideology in in my pre-teens in late 70’ies and early 80’ies. The message then was clear and I did everything to be the ideal man in the eyes of (feminist) women. Today this has become mainstream.

It is not too late to learn. Men have more time than women to figure it out. You gotta try in order to learn though. That’s the tough part.

I am sorry man. No one deserves that. You have never approached a girl, not even to be friends?

Did she ever face any consequences, such as having to pay for some of his fees? I doubt it.

@@FlamingCockatiel None that I am aware of.

He should have sued the crap out of her especially since she has a history of doing this to other guys.

This was many years ago, but when I was in college , i set a curfew for women. When what I mean by that is if you are a woman, you can not be inside my home after 9 pm.

@kennymelbert3892 like the old saying nothing good happens after midnight.

Don't forget the women like your sister

Thats exactly what is happening in the so called civilised world..even if the accuser is proved wrong,there's no punishment if its woman but if its viceversa they'd break every bone they can.

The probability of you being accused & 4 people you know also being accused is highly unlikely, I mean did you all approach the same woman......😂

I've been falsely accused 37 times! It's always their fault!

Sorry to hear this. A few years ago, I was in the pub with a few friends. We had all just come back from a day trip in London, got off the train, and went straight to the pub. A policeman came into the pub, and asked my friend if he could come to the police station. He was accused of raping a girl earlier that day - someone he had not seen since school. He was back with us in the pub an hour later (the police station, the pub, and the railway station were all within a few metres of each other). He was visibly shaken. The girl was known to the police - she had munchausen syndrome or somesuch, but they were obliged to follow up on her accusation. Presumably the police took my friend's statement, he showed them the train ticket, and he got released immediately. That was in the 1980's, but my friend never got over it. He was the nicest guy you could imagine. He is now - I am not kidding - a monk. I genuinely feel for you, and anyone else falsely accused. I hope you can put it firmly in the past.

@@badrabbit9964 lol man hater triggered

My sister held a door for someone and was told she is a racist.

I'm a guy and another guy held the door open for me last week at the gasoline station I did not feel condescended to you and said "thank you."

Yep, that situation you have described has happened to me three times...Now I only open doors to my elders and I now totally ignore a particular young gender.

is this a true story?

Don't hold the door for a woman anymore. It's a lose lose situation

@@badrabbit9964 Yes it is true and if you don't believe me, type this into your web browser search bar and read this article ...' Chivalry is actually... 'benevolent sexism', feminists conclude.'

​@badrabbit9964 I'm wondering the same thing. I always see these comments online but never in person. It's wild to me

Facts.

Haha. You should just own it mate. Keep saying “hows your Mexican lunch”.. so many people are just plain dumb

Racism should only be discussed by men

@@supernoveauI would if I was amongst friends. Not a cesspool of snakes called office politics / HR

OK, But you could have said, "Are you aware that in Mexico they also eat lunch at 3 PM?". I tell my kids that whether it is not having the right data for an essay question, or social stuff, to learn to "write your way around it". Our education system is set up to trap one into exam questions that have only one answer, in many cases. It just makes tests more efficient, and results comparable. Kids who have often been mostly students up to about 35 years of age, need to realize they aren't writing exams. Reframe, reframe, reframe.

I think the best thing to come out of it was an expanded view of consent and that it applies to all things and not just sex. "I don't want to do that" is a good enough reason for someone not to do something and everyone should respect that. You don't have to AGREE with that person or like it depending on what it is, but respect it and evaluate your relationship based on that. That has been a good thing, for the most part. Universities and their consent forms ("sign these papers before ya'll have sex, kids!") were stupid and ridiculous, but the idea that people can set their boundaries and you have to respect them is good. But also everyone needs to understand that those boundaries may be too much for some people ("Sorry, don't come within 5 feet of me ever" will not work), so set them with thought.

@@JD-gk7eh _“I don’t want to do that” is a good enough reason for someone not to do something and everyone should respect that._ Based, now apply that to tax.

“Me too” basically ended with Tara Reade and when rich old gays started getting accused. Lol

​@@JD-gk7eh I hear you, but there are a few times that the logic of "I don't want to do that" can be inconsistent. If you are in a committed relationship, then you expect your partner to sometimes do things for you and help you out - even when they wouldn't really "want" to - and the same applies to them expecting you to do things and helping them out when you don't really "feel" like you "want" to. Isn't that the whole point of a committed relationship in the first place? You commit yourselves to each other, so that you can depend on each other? If my girlfriend is on her period (a normal biological reproductive process), and she is having cramps and hormonal changes. She would expect me to take care of her. If she tells me I have to go to shops and buy her sanitary products, medication, treats like ice cream or chocolate, etc. and then cuddle with her afterwards... then I am sort of "obligated" to fulfill her requests and desires. If I refuse and say "I don't want to do that" and I want her to respect my "boundaries", then I'm going to seem like an a**hole who is selfish and doesn't care about her wellbeing. If this situation is presented on social media, people would call me out on not taking care of my girlfriend when she is in need. *_DISCLAIMER: The following paragraph is going to sound r*pey - but I assure you this is NOT my "actual" viewpoint. This is just a thought experiment and me pondering about the rules and mechanisms in society and our culture. It's me questioning why society views some actions that people do (even when they don't want to), as a normal part of life - however people doing other actions they don't want to (such as having s*x) as a crime, even when they are in a fully committed relationship. AGAIN, I assure you I do NOT actually believe this reasoning, it is just a line of questioning I find interesting. Please do NOT take this the wrong way._* I just find it interesting that if I have not engaged in s*xual activity (again, a normal biological reproductive process) for a long time (let's say 6 months), and I am experiencing sperm cramps, hormonal changes, and psychological changes from not having my foundational desires being met. I would "expect" her to take care of me in the same way I would take care of her - after all, it is a committed relationship and we both depend on each other. However, for some innate reason, if she refuses to engage in s*xual activity, she would not be seen as a person who is selfish and someone who doesn't care about her partner's wellbeing. If this situation is presented on social media, people might even stand with her for having strict boundaries and might attack me for "being a weak loser for complaining about not being able to keep it in my pants" or vilify me for "expecting s*x from her". AGAIN, I do NOT actually believe this logic. I FIRMLY understand and believe that s*x WITHOUT CONSENT is a CRIME! I just wanted to explore this reasoning and question why the different situations are treated differently by society

@@PrabhablyAGoodRU-vidrI wouldn’t listen to those people on the internet or share my circumstance with them and fundamentally, one shouldn’t be with a person who doesn’t meet your sexual needs. Men dont need to 🍇 their women if his needs aren’t being met, but at the same time it isn’t even 🍇 adjacent to state your requirements in a relationship and demand they be met.

Dont worry. Women have affermative action for that. 90% of CEO's were men, 90% of garbage collectors are men. But women only fought to make it equal at the top to get women into the ceo roles. It was never about equality...

I'm unemployed. i blame the me too movement

Most of us work from home now

by far not enough of all the former, though. by far not.

Yeah, they no longer get as much mentoring or training in the workplace, as senior men are refusing to do it in any one-on-one situation. That disadvantages them in the long run, as they will have to figure everything out themselves, meaning they will be less productive and so won't be qualified for promotions.

@@C12341 It does suck to be extremely hot. I hate it.

I was also a man in my 20s. What happened to us?

Most rapes are not random but by a male she knows already. Most rapes are underreported/unreported.

The problem is with imprecise terminology and framing. Of course there are psychopaths that can't be reeducated. What they mean by "teach men not to rape" is "teach men not to sexually coerce". Men do that regularly both in flings and long-term relationships by applying pressure, whining, begging, guilt-tripping, manipulation, threats, false promises etc. Some grow out of it. Many do not. These are men that everyone they know think are good guys. There are no conversations happening with and between men/boys about maybe not coercing women into sex, there are conversations of "good on you, getting someone to have sex with you", closing their eyes on "by any means necessary".

@@wyleecoyotee4252 OK, but I'm not sure what that has to do with my comment. My point was that the "teach men not to rape" approach will never be effective at preventing rapes any more than teaching kids that killing people is wrong has never stopped some from joining gangs and committing drive-bys. The rapist already knows what they're doing is wrong, just like every other criminal, they just don't care and do it anyway. It's not a lack of knowledge that's their problem, so you can't fix them with more teaching.

@@wyleecoyotee4252and fake sexual assaults are overreported. Two sides of the same coin, except men don’t lose to women, of course lol

@@spaceranger7683 that's true

This women should work near other women, NOT MEN!

@@garythomas4936 I'm confused... are you saying there should be women's only spaces? Well, the equipment I need isn't in the women's area, & segregation isn't the answer. Just being a good person is. I'm not interested in women's only gyms. Most of my friends are guys. My powerlifting team is mostly male. I plan on sending. We didn't come this far just to go back to separation. Remember

At this point, ain't no way I'm commenting on a womans body unless it's a close friend LOL. Ain't trying to get metoo'd LOL. I got to pick me :P

Hookup culture has always been around. It is not a new thing.

​@@Crusader677And it was tempered by a society that shamed poor behavior. When the anti-bullying campaigns decreased shaming, and turned into the "do whatever you want as long as it doesn't hurt anyone" ideals, that is when it went from bad to worse. Because doing whatever you want ignores long term consequences and impacts to society. We have become more selfish, and it is a downward spiral.

​@@Crusader677Ever heard of numbers?

women ☕

You can and will be INSULTED and even CHARGED criminal offenses for even basic common courtesy. Let that sink in. No. Avoid women, unless you want to learn the hard way.

Very cool 👌

I love that! I’d watch that chick flick 😍 And beg my husband to watch it with me lol

@@estherruth4692 hahaha well in sure yall have your own sweet story as well!

once upon a time, normality would have bored me. it's nice to hear stories of normality today

@@katefagan633 you are also lucky that he chose you. Is not like you decide and he bow

This is why it used to be that a woman could only consent to sex through marriage...

@@brent4073 Now they just accuse you of "abuse" and it's the same.

Get a nanny cam now before your next relationship. Don't keep it in the bedroom or bathroom areas tho.

I sometimes have business that brings me to our local university and there are posters everywhere with a similar sentiment. The wording had changed to something like "we believe you", which I suppose is a minor improvement but still not what I would consider a reasonable standard of verification for an allegation of a crime!

Women aren't even getting raped! it's all lies! it does not happen

Me too was a Hollywood fabricated witch-hunt.

​@@TheSaintFrenzyMore like it is a subtle eugenics movement utilizing social engineering to get rid of men that society deems "undesirable" for any reason from its gene pool!

I genuinely cannot put myself in the head of someone who lives in a reality in which they believe that the majority of people who believe in a movement such as Metoo do it just because it's "trendy." Do you ever go outside? Are you genuinely that chronically online?

@@MonkeyDIvan You're saying a hashtag is something that's not online & trendy? 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Hashtags are the very definition of online & trendy. When have you ever used a hashtag IRL?

It's really not. Why would they even want to?

What is a traditional lady? Genuinely curious, not being facetious.

If people would just stop telling their kids to take the candy, there would be no rape!

@@badrabbit9964 Yes, if it were, but instead there are people who know it's wrong to murder, steal, rape, kidnap and do it anyway because they don't fucking care. People only change when they want to change. I can't make people want it, I guess you can't either. Consequently, the only option is to accept the fact that the world is like this, not to engage in negligent, self-endangering behavior and to raise your children to do so. Without meaning to offend you: Your demand is so naively idealistic that it's almost cute, but unfortunately it's rather dangerously unrealistic.

Stories like that need to be brought out to women in the working world then maybe they will understand why they can't get hired because they are a liability and not an asset to the company.

The thought has suddenly struck me that there is a certain symmetry here. Women are deadly afraid of an assault which is much more unlikely than they think; while men are deadly afraid of the false accusation of an assault that is also much less likely than they think. How did we become so scared of each other?

One of the things he got absolutely right.

Checkout the book: The Pence Principle

No, it just means you'll lose without an effort.

Hence colleges closing down due to lack of enrolment

@@ricardoh87 Lack of enrollment due more to the cost of many degrees not being worth it - and the peasants have figured that out.

You're faulting women for being cautious to avoid unsavory situations?

@@wyleecoyotee4252 There's a huge difference between being cautious and blind, hateful ignorance. I have exes that broke the law just to punish me, that's not every woman on the planet's fault, it's just theirs. I am not responsible for the actions of men I've never met.

If you can’t date a ADULT, then “don’t”…stay single, and work on your manners.

yep everyone knows about revenge porn but nobody talks about how women pretty much ALWAYS character-assassinate their exes. they never take accountability in my experience, they always set right to telling anyone who will listen how they were innocent victims who were mistreated. they misrepresent everything to frame it to make themselves look like the innocent who had no agency who was bullied or abused or whatever else. "i think of a man, and i take away reason and accountability" remains undefeated. as per your example of the hotel room for a meeting thing... they want to have zero consequences for their actions. a girl i dated earlier this year had ended up living with a total monster for most of a year, and his sick behaviour was not her fault. however it WAS her choice to go and live with a male friend - rent free in his parents' very large luxurious house - after she made a few bad decisions. she could have stayed with her parents, with female friends. she had her own place but it wasn't quite livable at the time, and "he wouldn't let her fix it up". yeah right. more like she enjoyed living rent free in the big fancy house - until the guy turned out to be twisted. then she fled literally into the night. 3 weeks later she's on a date with me. i asked her how she thought it was reasonable to start dating so soon after escaping a guy who has clearly traumatised her and she said "i thought i was fine, i've handled breakups before, i thought i was ready". bullshit. she clearly needed rescuing. she was afraid her ex would send people to do something to her (his family were apparently involved with human traffickers!?) and... coincidentally... i just happen to be a big guy who is trained in martial arts. who had a place she could stay at where nobody would know where she was. suffice to say, that relationship didn't last very long at all. she kept running into problems with people and i suggested maybe she should pay professionals instead of relying on male "friends" for help. i said that she should acknowledge that while she was indeed a victim of a psycho, she also made bad decisions in life in general and it was inevitable that it would lead to bad things happening. of course, she couldn't handle that, couldn't take responsibility. got mad at me and became defensive and said "you were supposed to be safe and kind!" - this after i had spent a couple of weeks helping her with her mental state and basically looking after her. nobody's perfect but i had been a fucking great partner considering we'd dated for 2 months. but this doesn't matter to women. they are in pure survival mode and to survive she needed to find someone like me. then, when i tried to set some boundaries, she sabotaged it all so she could move on to the next thing because it was clear i wasn't going to be some dumb sap that would fix her life for her. no accountability, no reason. like a child.

Accountability is a woman's kryptonite

Don't want or need it. Carry on...

It's like the push for stronger gun control. The people this is affecting isn't the people actually committing the crimes, they don't listen regardless of how illegal it is

> it has negatively impacted non sexually aggressive men negatively Yep. "Untitled" by Scott Alexander is a good text about it. Quote (of a quote, he responds to, lol): > I spent my formative years-basically, from the age of 12 until my mid-20s-feeling not “entitled,” not “privileged,” but terrified. **I was terrified that one of my female classmates would somehow find out that I sexually desired her, and that the instant she did, I would be scorned, laughed at, called a creep and a weirdo, maybe even expelled from school or sent to prison.** You can call that my personal psychological problem if you want, but it was strongly reinforced by everything I picked up from my environment: to take one example, **the sexual-assault prevention workshops we had to attend regularly as undergrads, with their endless lists of all the forms of human interaction that “might be” sexual harassment or assault, and their refusal, ever, to specify anything that definitely wouldn’t be sexual harassment or assault.** I left each of those workshops with enough fresh paranoia and self-hatred to last me through another year. > My recurring fantasy, through this period, was to have been born a woman, or a gay man, or best of all, completely asexual, so that I could simply devote my life to math, like my hero Paul Erdös did. Anything, really, other than the curse of having been born a heterosexual male, which for me, meant being consumed by desires that one couldn’t act on or even admit without running the risk of becoming an objectifier or a stalker or a harasser or some other creature of the darkness. > Of course, I was smart enough to realize that maybe this was silly, maybe I was overanalyzing things. So I scoured the feminist literature for any statement to the effect that my fears were as silly as I hoped they were. But I didn’t find any. On the contrary: I found reams of text about how even the most ordinary male/female interactions are filled with “microaggressions,” and **how even the most “enlightened” males-especially the most “enlightened” males, in fact-are filled with hidden entitlement and privilege and a propensity to sexual violence that could burst forth at any moment.** > Now, the whole time I was struggling with this, I was also fighting a second battle: to maintain the liberal, enlightened, feminist ideals that I had held since childhood, against a powerful current pulling me away from them. I reminded myself, every day, that no, there’s no conspiracy to make the world a hell for shy male nerds. There are only individual women and men trying to play the cards they’re dealt, and the confluence of their interests sometimes leads to crappy outcomes. No woman “owes” male nerds anything; no woman deserves blame if she prefers the Neanderthals; everyone’s free choice demands respect. > That I managed to climb out of the pit with my feminist beliefs mostly intact, you might call a triumph of abstract reason over experience. But I hope you now understand why I might feel “only” 97% on board with the program of feminism. Response to this, from a feminist: > [Aaronson’s post] is the whole “how can men be oppressed when I don’t get to have sex with all the hot women that I want without having to work for it?” whine, one that, amongst other things, starts on the assumption that women do not suffer things like social anxiety or rejection…It was **just a yalp of entitlement combined with an aggressive unwillingness to accept that women are human beings just like men.** [He is saying that] “having to explain my suffering to women when they should already be there, mopping my brow and offering me beers and blow jobs, is so tiresome…I was too busy JAQ-ing off, throwing tantrums, and making sure the chip on my shoulder was felt by everyone in the room to be bothered to do something like listen.” Women are failing him by not showing up naked in his bed, unbidden. Because bitches, yo. > The eternal struggle of the sexist: Objective reality suggests that women are people, but the heart wants to believe they are a robot army put here for sexual service and housework.

On being 'pragmatic', the fascinating thing is when people tell off the cops for giving women advice. You need to have a level of confidence if you're actively endangering people in the name of purist political ideals. It's not something where I'd want to be wrong.

@@sinity8068 Trump called, he wants his wall back.

@@sinity8068""how can men be oppressed when I don’t get to have sex with all the hot women that I want without having to work for it?”" Typical feminist response of deflecting and strawmanning, just like the author expected: "and their refusal, ever, to specify anything that definitely wouldn’t be sexual harassment or assault" What is the work one has to do that ISN'T SEXUAL HARASSMENT or ASSUALT? The author's earlier quote: "I was terrified that one of my female classmates would somehow find out that I sexually desired her, and that the instant she did, I would be scorned, laughed at, called a creep and a weirdo, maybe even expelled from school or sent to prison" Your constant rhetoric of deflection and avoidance of male issues, while also blaming every single hetero interaction in a black and white manner is what caused him to see himself this way, and there is no given solution for addressing these issues rather than telling him to stfu and check his privilege. This is exactly why the feminist movement will NEVER have any complete straight male support, EVER.

I've seen 675 women scream at men for holding doors for them in public. In happens daily.

There is a difference between holding the door for someone, they are not in danger. However, if someone is in danger then they obviously need help, whether they are a man or woman. It's not that hard to differentiate the two.

​@@alluress2020nah it's not worth being a superhero today

@@berrymckockiner5883 It's never been worth it but people do it because they are good people not for the rewards or accolades. So just don't do it because it's not in your nature but don't blame it on women (and it's not even most women) who refuse to have the door held for them (and they have every right to refuse. This brings up another point, good people don't force their aid onto others.

@@alluress2020Ah, so you should ask for consent, is that it? Is verbal confirmaton enough? Seeing someone who is clearly less powerful being attacked, then one would be likely to intervene for the underdog. But if the accepted position is that women and men are equally capable in a fight, then perhaps it is better to stand back and see how it goes until intervening? After gaining consent. From the weaker person only?

I don't know how the child is gonna forgive his mother from removing him and trumatising both of them as well as ensuring his reputation is forever blighted.

Same. I was never interested in drinking but the fact that alcohol makes you more vulnerable made me even less interested in wanting to drink.

What a smart idea!

My mum drummed into me before I started going out that you do not go anywhere alone, not to the toilet, not for fresh air, nothing. And I never did, I'd see girls passed out on the pavement or propped on the toilet and wonder where the hell her friends were! I've also seen girls like this alone with a group of young guys that were apparently 'looking after' her. Perhaps they were but no chance my conscience would let me leave her alone with them.

That has less to do with your physique and more to do with your female emotional nature. This is just the way woman often are.....and that's ok.....that's attractive to men.

You bulked up in yours 30s?

The Uni should have been sued for millions

Your analysis wasn't wrong, she was soon going to display a lot more of those signs.

You dodged a bullet; you were lucky.

Its only assault if the man is unattractive

A pass? Or touches?

No the problem is that many are both hypocrites and enablers. How many women (actresses) new about Harvey Weinstein, continued to sleep with him and sent other women to him?! And eventually threw him under the bus?!!

A bad date is considered an assault looking at a woman a few seconds longer is also included in that as well.

Growing up I though assault had to involve physical contact or something extreme like blocking someones path. Me too expanded it to include not just repeated unwelcome advances or one vulgar advance but even just one awkward or unwelcome advance even going to the point of including eye contact.

False accusers are not half as common as rapists who walk free though. Women are still in a far worse position here. Sex is risky for both sexes, and it shouldn't just be women who have to take precautions about who they sleep with and what situations they get themselves into. Decent men should be careful too - not getting too intoxicated, avoiding being alone with women who are intoxicated, and taking the lead to explicitly discuss consent would be a really helpful start. No one should ever be held responsible in law for these wrongs being done to them, but that doesn't mean that we shouldn't encourage people to be more responsible towards themselves.

@@lavienestpasunlongfleuvetr2559 “explicitly discuss consent”... is a great way to never get laid as a guy. It’s already hard enough for men and now you want them to bring up something that specifically turns off the opposite sex, in a manner of communication that the opposite sex specifically hates. Don’t blame men for playing the game, blame women for being actively repulsed by what you’re suggesting.

@@liquidsnakex. Tell me you’ve been guilty of sexual assault without telling me you’ve been guilty of sexual assault….

​@@liquidsnakexwomen who are actually attracted and willing to you don't have to be asked for consent. Consent was a false premise from the get go. It only helps strangers navigate a social behaviour seemingly not meant for strangers. Sex seems to rest on attraction and physiological/psychological willingness. If sex is ultimately to pass on genes and reproduce, their reactivity makes sence, women take on the majority of the disadvantages of being parents. So their bodies are more reactive to an unwanted reproductive partners. The threshold for unwanted reproductive partner seems higher in females than males.

@@emeraldtier1750 "women take on the majority of the disadvantages of being parents" - i completely disagree with that statement.

Get new friends

passport bro what's your fav country?

He's just concerned about women!

​@@badrabbit9964he will pay dearly for it too

it will be 2024 in a week, and im tired as hell of walking on eggshells and being politically correct because feelings are now more important than facts... men should stand up and say/do something when a bad situation happens or is about to happen...if you see a woman get her purse taken, dont wait for the cops and go kick that guys ass.. and women need to step up and accept that not everything is mens fault... if youre a woman over 30 and cant get a man to commit, maybe its because youre not trying to do anythng to add to a mans life

screw that i'm not risking my life for a bunch of ingrates and leaving my daughter without a father .@@unholysaint1987

Exactly. It's really her fault if she gets assaulted. Not the criminal involved.

@@badrabbit9964 OP isnt saying its her fault, but its pretty dumb to go to dangerous places and expect to be safe. As a figure of speech, why not go holidaying in a warzone for instance? wouldn't it be the fault of the soldiers if you got blown up?

I agree we as a man, for most of the time, are not thinking about where and at what time we are walking and if it is safe. A woman unfortunately has to think about this all the time. I talked to a police officer once and somehow we talked about me walking around in the evening and in the dark in a forested area or outside a city. (making 10000 steps) He said it is not save even for me as a tall and bigger man to walk around. I said I'm not afraid, he said it's not about being afraid, but is it wise to look for trouble or danger. He was right when i thought about it. Like you wrote " if I'm aware a situation could be dangerous, then why wouldn't I avoid it when possible?"

Statistically speaking you're far more likely to be attacked in the scenario you're describing than your wife or her friend are. Men make up the vast majority of homicide victims globally (typically hovers around 80% as per UNODC stats) and are more likely to be victims of violent crime and assaults, particularly random street crime. *Everyone* should be wary to a sensible degree.

It's really hard to avoid harassing and stalking! But we just have to do it now!

I would say quite a lot, most of it in college where she drinks to excess and says yes or obliges the man but wakes up with regret and accuses him. But women doing stupid stuff like that or saying 'I can wear what I WANT at the club' without realizing 99 good men and 1 bad man means it might end up badly for her is lack of accountability and that is one skill where women FAR exceed men on, accountability is a woman's kryptonite

Remember men have been told to leave women alone at the gym, at work, in public, at the station, at night clubs... Since they aren't even considering putting in the effort to pick up the slack and do some of the approaching, the only ones left approaching are men that don't care.

@@eznosnopes5276 True, when I pick up a woman, I do not care about anything related to her, I just want a need fulfilled. They enabled this behavior, I just adapted and overcame

@@TheImapotato Is it possible that a woman's dress and behavior may not be the cause of somebody assaulting her? That this somebody is aching to assault a woman and that these factors are only significant in the choice of victim?

@@darylchance9324 That is an inane rhetorical question from someone who does not have basic reading comprehension skills. Read what I wrote before you ask a silly question making yourself look the fool

When the society at large incentivises the behavior of falsely accusing others its doomed to fail.

It’s actually common sense that women lie . It’s crazy we even have to say this .

It's literally giving someone a financial and social incentive to lie, requiring absolutely no burden of proof, and zero consequences and only benefits for your actions. Only the super moral would refuse

Its the same with all crime, if you look strong and alert you're less likely to get robbed. People forget we are still animals too

@pkway9394 I wouldn't call this behavior a philosophy, but rather that of hunting predators. We humans are omnivorous, mostly hairless predators of the genus dry-nosed monkeys. No amount of walking upright, no rational, foresighted thinking and no “civilization” changes anything. Only people with elitist ideas, who absolutely have to believe themselves to be better than animals because their ego can't stand being an animal, consider people to be higher, almost god-like beings.

So refreshing to see men standing up for men's rights.

a man shouldn't go home with a gal he just met either

No, those women said nothing, the ones who spoke up did not go through with it becasue it is and was wrong, it was wrong for the directors and producers to even offer. this is the problem. Many men like you do not seem to know right from wrong, its "OK" if you can get away with it... That's why men are and will continue to suffer.

It was a bigger issue than getting a part in a movie or not, it was the casting couch or having your career destroyed.

yeah none of them felt like they had to in order to get ahead in their careers!

@@badrabbit9964 harvey Weinstein had ex israeli military ops following people around who rebuffed him...many of these men could end a woman's career with a few choice words to the right people. Blacklisting is real.

You literally call women “narcissistic” and “entitled” if we want romance. You want us to just obey, scrub floors, and make sandwiches.

@@ChickFenwicksomebody is not here for dialogue.

​@@ChickFenwickYou could start a drive-in theatre with all that projection.

​@@ChickFenwickConsidering that men are expected to protect women (with our lives if necessary) while on a date or otherwise, doesn't that merit some level of obedience/submission on a woman's end? A man's life isn't cheap.

@@23chngeexactly, how many have simply asked for “nice” and couldn’t even get that, even that was too much, F it, they on there own

It’s almost like there’s more than one woman out there, and that they might have different opinions. But how could that be possible? 🤦‍♀️

@Vventure23 I am talking about left politics cultural trend. Which way is it? Does the left want to fight against sexual exploitation and objectificatjon? Or for more sexual liberation and self objectification? How can a ideaology simultaneously does both? Doesn't it mean the left society is just lost and rudderless? The right had always said sex work is immoral and people should be proper. The libertarian had always said you go and do whatever you like. What does the Left want?

⁠@@sunso1991We know women will Never be pleased 100% .. They want to be able to move the goal post when it best suits them. Do whatever they want without being held accountable… it’s that simple

​@@sunso1991It's whatever is likely to pull the West down.

@@williammentink Yeah that’s why it flips and flops so much, because their stated goals are all brazen lies, their only real goal is doing whatever it takes to destroy anywhere even remotely free or civilized. Genuinely evil ideology with the body count to prove it.

There's been a few that have done time in the UK though they were serial accusers that had a history of doing it on, about 10-12 separate occasions. Sadly there are women fighting her corner and using it as another "Look at how oppressed women are" moment. I think they're the kind of sisterhood nutjobs that believe women can never do anything wrong. It's a shit state of affairs that's for sure.

@@taffwob Getting a year in prison for every false accusation that ruins a man's life is a slap on the wrist. It's just to give the appearance of doing something, but anyone with two braincells to rub together can tell it's hollow.

It’s only wrong if she doesn’t think the guy is hot.

There was a young man in the UK that was charged with sexual assault for grabbing a girls hand.

​@WinstonSmithGPT yes that's how sex and dating works. You tend to only like sexual things from people you're sexually attracted to

The thing noone talks about is... the only way to develop razor sharp social skills/intuition is by having those awkward situations and rejections behind you. It's impossible for a man to be romantically competent without stacking reference experiences. You can't expect men to be socially aware and at the same time tell them not to make mistakes reading social situations. The mistakes are the very thing that lead to social awareness (as an analogy, an Olympic gymnast can do the most amazing flips but it's only because they've failed tricks more times than a pedestrian has even tried. That's how they got their knowledge. It's similar with dating and romance for men). So by demonizing the process, they've effectively GUARANTEED that the odds of men being awkward and 'ungentlemanly' will be a lifetime problem at scale rather than a transitory phase. Sad.

You've hit the nail on the head. Perception, interpretation and context are everything. Other than in clear-cut cases with hard (biological) evidence, we're talking about 'he said / he did' versus 'she said / she did' scenarios. Often without evidence and witness accounts. All I'm left with, as a mother, is to advise teenage boys and young men that they outright ask (verbally) for consent first, and that a verbal or even slightly non-verbal 'no' means an emphatic do-not-proceed at all. (This still doesn't protect against false-accusations though.) And to advise females to follow Louise's advice here. Very difficult for everyone.

It isn't just women, men are easily manipulated these days as well. That is general problem when you get environment filled with different ideologies and mindsets that are being thrown at you constantly. We are generations that grew up under those circumstances and you can really see consequences of it now.

Women are more agreeable and therefore more likely to go with the herd.

Thanks for the feedback guys. I tend to agree with the second comment. That’s true for most women, of course not all

@@hollygrace6814 It's because women are more agreeable (just like @Gengh13 pointed out), emotional and submissive in general. So it's easier to manipulate women than men (Men can also get manipulated easily though)

@@Gengh13 are you calling women cows ? that's not very nice is it🤣🤣😉

They will find a guy to take care of them, don't you worry lol

I'm doing a childless happy dance here. It's all about choice 😀

@@ricardoh87 no they won't, they don't need men to take care of them. they will probably have quite a few cats though 🤣😂🤣

No.5 contradicts the popular belief that men love a good challenge i.e. men love to hunt. Holding off sex might actually activate the 'hunter" in them & most men get around it by sleeping with someone else. However, a better way to see if a man is serious about you is to ensure he invests in you before you sleep with him. The level of investment will depend on the resources available to the man. If he doesn't have a lot of money, then make sure he spends money on you before you hook up, the more money he has the higher the financial investment you should expect. If he has a lot of money but is busy then ensure he also invests(sacrifices) his free time for you in addition to financial investment. It's not foolproof but a 1000 times better filter than holding off sex. At least if he doesn't end up committing, the girl gains something. However, holding off sex will just lead to the girl being sexually frustrated (cause chances are the guy is getting it from some other woman).

@@alluress2020 Thank you for sharing your valuable perspective. I agree with you that a man's level of investment in a woman is a measure of his commitment. However, some men will do anything to sleep with a woman and once he has completed his mission, he will no longer invest in that woman (the cat's in the bag). This is a strong indicator that he was just looking for sex. My view differs from yours in that if a man is unable to delay gratification, it's a clear sign that he lacks impulse control. And this is one of the determining factors that he will continue to lack impulse control throughout his relationships with women.

@@alluress2020 #5, the woman makes the one guy wait, and she goes around having sex with everyone else, original guy finds out and expresses his displeasure, she gets p*ssed off that he thinks he has any say in the matter, they stop talking. He's back to square one. That's how it usually works, unless the guy is high status, rich, a 9 or 10.....then it works out as you mentioned...the male gets it elsewhere

@@v9b23j That's an interesting opinion on delaying gratification however, I don't believe this is as strong an indicator as you believe it is as men who can't delay gratification will sleep with other women while they wait for your arbitrarily imposed clock to run out. However, these are at the end of the day just our opinions not backed by any strong evidence. So we can agree to disagree on this one.

the best way is to go double Dutch as they used to say, pay for your self. he pays for himself, a man actually finds that really thoughtful. At least if he doesn't end up committing, the girl gains something. However, holding off sex will just lead to the girl being sexually frustrated (cause chances are the guy is getting it from some other woman). wow! that used to be a thing i didn't know it still happened (SHAME) most people would call that "RINSING". and most women that do that are only out for there own self interest. if your not sure what it means look it up

Glad ur learning

Easy rule of thumb: they’re all lying until proven otherwise

Its wrong to approach random people and try to force yourself on them or assume that they want you becasue of what they wear. you are blaming the victim and not holding the CRIMINALS accountable. Nothing anyone does short of giving you permission or consent en titles you to making sexual advances on them. period.

​@@r.walker7986in his comment, he repeatedly "held the criminals accountable". Repeatedly. You simply don't want to acknowledge that both the criminal AND the victim are accountable for the event. If I mouth off a cop and he shoots me, I'm the victim, absolutely. He should not have shot me. However, he would not have shot me if I did not mouth off. Don't bring out the worst in people that need little excuse to hurt you. That's called being a mature adult, and feminists don't want to do that.

@@r.walker7986 ever heard about something called "common sense"? It is a somewhat archaic concept I know but perhaps you could find the time to google it.

@@aarondimoff5180 no, a victim is a victim. Access or "inspiration" is not an excuse. There are not two sides to sexual assault. It the honest of a person to get consent before they make any physical moves on another person. That's the end. i don't care to make rapist feel better by spreading the blame to a woman's hem length...

@@r.walker7986 nothing you said has anything to do with what we said. You're ignoring our arguments and making up random strawmen instead. Please increase your literacy.

Critical thinking and common sense are taught behaviour and require an understanding of consequences and logical chain outcomes that are not taught.

@belaad in most cases, critical thinking and common sense, as well as logical chain outcomes, are all even more basic than arithmetic. You don't need a wealth of knowledge and someone holding your hand to make better decisions. None of it is rocket science. It's built-in to all of us to one degree or another. Even a baby knows to throw pillows down before exiting the crib, or it might get hurt(I did this at less than 2 years old).

Critical thinking is a tall order. More than half of humanity believes in Bronze Age mythology.

Lets' remind women that they're not queens!

Thanks for the history lesson, and accurate assessment of current social problems. Makes alot of sense. Men are still much hardier than women, which reinforces traditionalism, as it should.

@@jozette-pierce There was conflation between chivalry and gentlemanly behavior It’s worth pointing out so we can understand the nuance of what is being asked Otherwise, this devil hiding in the details is confusing when the meaning of words and where they come from aren’t fully understood Causing us to run in a circle and go 🤷🏻‍♂️

Classical chivalry was a knight serving a queen/princess and a life dedicated to chastity on their behalf as a form of loyalty. The popular use of the term has to do with courtship practices. The code of ethics was built to protect women in power, despite them never being a potential suitor. It is misguided to see chivalry as courtship the two couldn't be farther apart but that's how language changes.

There must be something to all this, because even childrens' most popular fairy tales, are all about knights, princesses, prince charming. Every little girl wants to be a Disney princess, for sure.

⁠​⁠@@jozette-pierce It might be an evolution of storytelling Stories such as the Little Mermaid and One Thousand and One Nights had a mixture of good and bad Disney movies took them, removed a lot of the bad, and propped up the good The emotions it left us with from these experiences gave rise to emotions Grown women fantasized about a “Prince Charming” in the form of Twilight and Shades of Gray Men fantasized about being loved for who they were… for being enough Both were fantasies sold to us by Hallmark cards, commercials, and other forms of media Love is not enough People are shallow It we can aspire for more To be the best versions of ourselves And achieve autonomy over our own lives Then, maybe, we have a chance at a happy middle and decent ending

And guess who would come up first after a short period of time? WEEDS

Really that's interesting. What's been the difference in interaction and treatment when they think you are single vs have a girlfriend

The other thing - there's a cultural expectation that single people can work longer hours. After all, nobody's waiting for you back home...

@@alexpotts6520 Single as in umarried or single as in no significant other

@@Alifeofadventures503 Usually women hit on you more...when I was on dating apps, all of my photos were with a group or a couple of women surrounding me. Got a high success rate of matches.

@@Alifeofadventures503 it works really well, for me if i ask i a girl out and she says she has a boyfriend, i say "good for you" and walk away. even though i know they don't i have a few photos from previous relationships that didn't end well though i need a few older ones now as i'm getting older, the best way to get them i have found is to ask a women if they don't mind me taking a photo of them when they are dressed up to go out, some say yes others say no the NO ones i stay well away from, they tend to be the toxic variety.

"Trust in Allah... but tie up your camel." -- Old Arabic proverb

She still has to be found attractive either way

Not just women, these people see targets regardless of gender

@@GFTCNJRape isn’t about attraction it’s about power

​@@msnewseniorI've heard this all my life and I don't buy it. That may be true of forcible rape by a stranger or someone trying to establish power over another. I don't believe it's true of the vast majority of rape where alcohol is involved and the victim can't consent. In those cases I believe it's more about opportunity and the desire for sex.