Hello you legends. Watch the full episode with Louise here: ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-HAmQ7Tcrh6A.html. Get a 35% discount on all Cozy Earth products at www.cozyearth.com/modernwisdom
These obsessions are facilitated as DIVERSIONS from engagement with major issues like the massive eexpansion of the Surveillance State, violent policing by police, policing by extra-legal institutions like universities and big tech etc.
Its funny because the founder of Lululemon just came out and said he doesn't agree with them making clothes for woke agenda lmfao! Like a couple days ago. Hilarious. Oh, can't forget that Victoria Secret also got a model with downsyndrome. Not saying that's a bad thing, but like...why?! Sure that specific model was cute but, thats so very far from the norm with people with DS and doesn't make sense because people with DS don't even think about or react to this sort of "normal" stigma. Social media is the root of all of this. Once corporations got involved and agendas were created it seems like the main push has been to normalize the abnormal will dehumanizing the normal. I was out having drinks with past coworkers and they asked me if I was gay, I guess because I dress nice and idk, I'm a man so i can't answer the why part. But I replied "Nah, I'm just a regular straight dude" and a group of 7 adults, 2 of which are straight, audibly gasped at me. Like I was the abnormal. I quit shortly after that. But that shocked me. Like, im the normal one here...
I've been saying this for YEARS and so many women have disagreed with me. "Hurr durr I don't do it for men I do it for myself." No. No you don't. You do it for other women.
It would be curious indeed if "doing it for myself" manifested itself exactly the same in 99% of women. The standards are too uniform for true independent agency to be a credible explanation.
@alexpotts6520 that's exactly right. In fact stating that they're doing it for themselves is because of the competition. Looking like you'd take others men (looking good to attract partners) would threaten other women and make you disliked, thus threatening their status in the group.
"It's intersexual competition." Thank you. Feminists love to pin the blame on men for these increasing standards, but it's women fighting amongst themselves. Women also engage in mate guarding, they just do it in different ways.
Victim mentality. Yes, we were lied to. So were men. So were a lot of other people. Almost everyone was lied to one way or the other. Being a victim is not glorifying. Now they know the truth. So the ball is in their court (our court. I'm a woman)
Beauty is a positional good, it's a zero-sum game. The reason that women can never feel beautiful enough is because their beauty is only ever judged relative to other women, and all those other women are locked in the same unwinnable arms race.
She nailed it when she said men are actually easy to please. I wish more women able to see that she could be attractive to 90% of men if she just focused on her loving herself and staying in shape. It's free! and benefits you regardless of who you date. Don’t spend money on fake shit or dwell on things you can't change ladies - it's draining to date people who need constant validation
The problem with men being easy to please is that many women can qualify, and when many women qualify they become easily interchangeable. So when a man is desirable he tends to not be monogamous and enacts on his biological desire of variety.
I'll never forget going dressed up to a Halloween party as cat woman. I got so much attention that night and one of my 'friends' turned to me and said 'you know you would look amazing if you shaved your hair off'. I always wondered why she would say something like that but now I know....
Lol wth. I noticed women give other women bad advice like "no you look good as a curvy woman" in order to keep them unappealing in order to get all the attention from other men. Men compete directly while women do it indirectly.
This whole conversation makes me so grateful to be a woman in my fifties living in a region where oddly little concern is given to appearance (inland northwest, U.S.). We work our behinds off, like men, because our climate and our industry (mostly agriculture and transportation) demand it. Most of us can't fathom wasting money on something as frivolous as a manicure. I haven't put a chemical on my head since I turned fifty, and I forfeited my "beauty routine" when I left California. I maintain my health through diet and hard work, and I'm always clean, but I couldn't care less about any of this crap anymore. Perhaps it's because I've already established my reproductive fitness (three sons, two grandsons) and can maintain myself financially that this whole thing seems so absurd. (Note: I do have hair nearly to my waist, but that's just because it's easier to maintain and keeps me warm).
I think the having to work hard is a big factor. A lot of people have cushy lives and spend an increasing amount of time seeking novelty. It becomes an addiction.
Thanks, I agree. It's been several years. I haven't regretted it for a minute. It's so awesome that there are wonderful, supportive men like yourself here to support women. 😉@@jimreplicant
As a man, it is so attractive to find a woman who isn’t caught up in all of this. Taking care of yourself is one thing, but chasing some manufactured beauty standard is highly undesirable as a partner. It’s way more attractive to see a woman with real hobbies than spending all that time on vanity
@@knowvilleknows1075Op didn't say the partner needs to be perfect. He said he wants the type of girls who spend money on hobbies instead of endless cosmetics.
I couldn't help but be reminded of this verse, which may be offensive to some, but suggests that the pursuit of physical beauty is a costly dead end. "“Your beauty should not come from outward adornments, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight.”
“Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”
An interesting point she made, "It isn't that we haven't made any advancements it's that they were made in the beauty sector." To broaden that statement, it isn't because we can't improve anymore it's because our priorities shifted to more menial and mundane things. We have made many things they just aren't things that matter in the grand scheme of things.
This is why I've been so frustrated talking to most women when they bring up female beauty standards as some kind of patriarchal, male-led conspiracy. Beauty standards are, quite literally, the long-term result of the dissolution of women-on-women beauty policing. Women have ALWAYS known that they were in a sexual/beauty arms race with other women. Only now that slut shaming has been decried on a societal level that you see this kind of thing growing exponentially. It's never been about pleasing men or meeting the expectations of men. It is and always has been about competing and showing off to other women.
@@kc6810you'd think for something that for something only a fraction of women experience thanks to drugs and happens monthly that these "stronger and more resilient than men" boss babes wouldn't be complaining about basic bodily functions this much. But I guess when it's the only real problem you have in life you gotta do what you gotta do
This is such nonsense. Men care deeply about looks. Why do you think these women supposedly compete? Also frankly, when I spend time alone with women, we stop dressing up (unless there are fancy events). We sit around in our pyjamas and eat junk food on the floor. We make ridiculous jokes and snort laughing. We literally sit in the most unflattering poses, make the most unflattering faces - that’s part of relaxing from the pressures of being out in society. On the flip side, if this whole competition idea were the only reason women dress nicely, then you’d expect that when I go out with friends, if a girl is dressed badly, I’d be happy - no! I not only feel bad for her, I feel annoyed that she’s not keeping up appearances. 1. Because women love beauty and aesthetics and it feels jarring to have one girl in the group clashing (sort of like showing up to a costume party with a boyfriend who’s in a suit) 2. Because I feel like she is not living up to the standards we as a friendship group want to convey to SOCIETY. That’s not just women and it’s not just men. It’s a bouncer at a club, it’s the maître d’ at a fancy restaurant, it’s the taxi driver, it’s men who try and approach us, it’s girls we might meet out, it’s potential employers, it’s a real estate agent, it’s EVERYONE
Wrong. It’s about being the most desired woman . In order to attract the high value / alpha male to procreate. It’s biology. It’s pretty simple. It’s competition.
It’s not a mental health issues but rather a “I am suppose to want it all, do it all, and look amazing while doing it all” is not sustainable and it will break
I am a woman who doesn't use make up, don't dye my hair, never had my nails done (I do rock climb), have 1 hand bag that I got from my mum... and yet I have a wonderful man, I have friends and I like my work and I am genuinely happy ❤
I'd like to say not getting my nails/hair/lashes/botox done or buying designer clothes is me taking a stand against the impossibly high beauty standards we are held to. ✊🏼 ...in reality I'm just skint and cant be bothered with the level of upkeep 😂
Don't fall for it! It's all a rat race. Like how I as a man won't fall for the trends of fades etc just to try and look trendy. What do I get for it all anyway? It's all fake.
@@tigerbear3038 I'm fairness that's one I couldn't get on board with even if I could afford it, I just think it's a massive con. I find it so strange that people boast about how much money they have spent on something, I'm the opposite I'll only let on how much something was if I got a bargain! 😂
Who exactly is holding you to the beauty standard of wearing nails/lashes/botox and buying designer clothes? Pretty much all guys would either not notice or not care..
As Chris mentioned, competition and indoctrination can effectively influence a significant portion of the population. Generally speaking, men don't pay much attention to details like nails. Maintaining good hygiene, proper hair care, and basic skincare, which is more about a healthy lifestyle than anything else, should suffice. However, it might be perceived as a form of narcissism in a broader sense. In relationships, some women may lose interest in maintaining their appearance because they no longer feel the need to compete. Conversely, those who uphold high beauty standards might be seen as actively positioning themselves in the market, suggesting that their current partner falls short in some way.
@@OM-or3imOr fear is rooted in anxiety. I would say anxiety is pre-fear as it doesn’t have an object upon which to focus and actually seeks to become fear.
I remember my grandpa gave me a box of Rogaine in my 20s because I was starting to lose my hair. I threw it away, grew out my beard and started shaving my head. I will age, I will get old, and I will not waste money fighting Father Time.
I think there’s something to the saying, “Men age like scotch, women age like milk.” They say it’s unfair, but I think it’s a fairest thing in the world. They have all the power from their teens to maybe early 30s then it starts to flip.
@kc6810 which is much better than being culturally, emotionally, and romantically being beaten to a pulp when you're growing up. Leaves lifetime scars for many.
@@brianmeen2158 And its not even for staying young but to combat the industrial lowering of our testosterone levels. Lts time I checked my levels the doctor was like I wouldnt recommend TRT yet but I still had levels if you go by the chart of a 60 year old at 35.
Cognitive dissonance is the most common reason for mental health issues, IMO. It is when you constantly live your life in a way that you KNOW is not right, and are constantly disappointed that you aren't happier doing all the wrong things. This also reflects an inability to process that there are consequences to your actions, that you OWN.
BUT........If I know I'm lonely, but I'd rather be lonely than risk being abused by a human again. I know that is not correct I wouldn't call that cognitive dissonance, it's a conscious choice with a lesser consequence.
@@jcronin3155 Yet, there is no evil or wrong in choosing to be single. You are not purposefully hurting somebody else or doing something you know is wrong.
I'm getting old because I can remember: Plastic Surgery was something only aging celebrities and socialites did. It was associated with 'getting old'. A comical sitcom moment could be a middle-aged woman worried about getting old saying "ya when I'm 60 I'm going to get a facelift!" and the audience might laugh since 'facelift' did mean you were 60. It was entirely associated with women. You assumed women did that as you might today saying 'manicures'. If a Hollywood man had plastic surgery it would be considered so weird and fruity. So he's a gay now? - -- When i found college girls were getting plastic surgery I'd always assume they must have had something wrong like a birth defect or maybe a car accident. It just baffled me that they were just doing it to look prettier or more desirable. I still cant get past that. -------- Its true we forget stuff as the bar rises (or lowers) but 10 minutes ago it was NORMAL for people to have crooked teeth, odd colored teeth and even missing teeth. I mean normal healthy people of no special problem. I was abnormal that i just had very straight aligned even teeth from sheer natural genetic chance and then it became normal all high school students had straight even teeth. It was very normal to see a kid or adult with buckteeth' or 'gap teeth'. Really, if someone had bright white teeth that was weird.
This is one reason muslim women wear hijab. Muslim ppl believe it is protection for society/woman. As they cover their beauty it makes it more important for them to develop their personality, morals and intellect, to be defined by. This makes them pleasant to talk to and hold real conversations around shared values, beliefs and long-term life goals that are also deep and transcend in nature. It prevents ppl getting arrogant and getting a superiority complex based on superficial trates. Keeps ppl down to earth, modesty. Trys to prevent self entitlement and Princess complex. It trys to prevent the commercialisation/weaponising of "beauty", by it not being a publicly displayed and traded commodity/currency. Trys to give women a break from having to compete with each other on just beauty, in open public. That can cause feelings of jealousy. Helps to try to prevent an army of simps and street pestering. As her beauty is for HER and the special people SHE chooses in her life. Helps to try to prevent insecurities trying to maintain unrealistic and unsustainable beauty standards, that are forever changing and expensive to uphold. This can cause mental issues in people and the sense of constant judgement and body shaming from people that don't know you or care about your long-term good. Peace
Obsession with beauty is no longer a concern only to look good for your potential romantic partner and such. Its alsl about marketing yourself as a 'valuable person' in this competitive society that values beauty, and sure beauty lies on the eyes or beholder but conventional beauty standard exists and they do grant you power in society.
I can assure you this is not exclusively a female issue...i think its worse for women but the pressure on men is getting worse ....the body aesthetic is crazy for men now.
But that's fine though. Body aesthetics done right is just good fitness. You don't have to be a body builder or a top athlete. You just need to eat right and exercise regularly.
@FeralLogic You're not wrong, but a lot of Gen Z young men and teens are not doing this right. There's a lit of fitness influencer nonsense making kids more likely to starve themselves, take excessive supplements, or try testosterone injections. Not a huge number, yet, but this wasn’t a problem 10 years ago.
For other women? When its competition to attract the most attention from men and outcompete other women, its directly done for attracting high status men and not for other women.
It’s done to knock the competition (eg other women) out of the game. Yes you’re right it’s competing for men but by way of getting through the other women
@sad_wrangler8515 Not true. I'm friends with one of the top psychologists in the world. He said women dress to impress other women. I'm a woman who is into fashion. I guarantee you this is true. When I walk into a room, all the women have their eyes on me...
@@Mint-kj9kw the thing about women is they always use anecdotal evidence from one or two people in their own personal lives in an attempt to refute large scale facts & statistics. and they end up being very, very wrong. every single time smh.
It is so weird for me, to look at my mum, and how she is in her pension years, have so many activities, hobbies, and stuff she want to do, and aging gracefully. While I see women only 10 years younger than her, still going out to bars, trying to pretend they are still "fit" and "on the market", have no hobbies or worthwhile things to do, and just seem fixated on their non existant "youth"!? It really is sad and tragic, and I truly pity the women that have bought into the lie from both femenism, pop culture and advertisment. And now are moving towards their 60's and still try to pretend they are somehow 25 year olds, while having no practical skills, no hobbies, and no meaning in their life..... And yet, for reasons I dont quite understand, they keep "selling" the same lie they were told, to younger women....
I'll help you understand it: deep down they're bitter and resentful of their life choices and seek to poison and destroy other women who still have a shot at a decent life
Yet the best investment these women can do in being attractive to men is being slender and fit. Yet that's harder to do. A note to the ladies, you being even a little overweight is the worst thing you can do in undermining your attractiveness to men.
This is spot on. You can't change your facial features, hair color, etc., but you can get off your ass and go to the gym. Any female that shows she gives a damn about her body already proves to me this person has self-control, dedication, drive, and will be able to help take care of my kids down the road because she isnt too fat to move.
@@tarap5836 Stay single then. I'm not asking women to be professional athletes or body builders. I'm asking them to give a damn about their body and not eat themselves into an early grave.
@@tarap5836 when did I say it was? If women (or men) are not attracting the mate they want, my advice (specifically for women) is to not cake on more make up, do your nails more, or whatever superfluous crap you all do to make other women jealous. My advice is to get in shape. Does wonders for your physical, mental, and emotional health.
Funny thing is the girls compete among each other and the boys really don’t care much. I think only very few men really like artificial nails, for example .
The fake lips have to stop. Who likes that ish? It’s like a bill board for insecurity. 😂 Like a man with a bad fake hair piece to “hide his baldness” but it only makes his insecurity MORE visible. Back when I was in my mid 20s and noticed my hair was starting to thin in the back I just shaved it all off and never looked back. Turns out I looked way better shorthaired and bearded anyway.
@@nahkaboltsi6315 naaa it was like a noticeable “bald spot” and I take after my mother’s side of the family. I’m almost the spitting image of her father, and it was the same for him, just genetics. Damn grandpa, could fix tanks in World War II, but couldn’t grow proper hair. 😂
I find the shaved head with a beard look very attractive… a lot more attractive than a guy trying to hold on to some of the hair or, god forbid, getting that fake hair stuff.
Dude here. I hate: hair coloring, makeup, colonics, implants, scarification, tattoos, piercings, lip fillers. Especially lip fillers. I've seen many of them, and they NEVER EVER make you look better. 100% of the time, they make you look worse. Stand up for yourself and reject these things. Be your own person. Don't give in to societal pressure. Plastic surgery is a lie you wear on your face.
Beauty standards may be part of it, but anecdotally, the women close to me think they can have a career and be a homemaker and volunteer at the school and go to the gym etc... My personal belief is that women take on too much because they believe they can. Then when they feel that life is hectic or they fail they blame themselves rather than the crazy obligations that they've decided to make. I feel like i am constantly telling my female loved ones to do less.
I work for a family where the wife is a boss at work, and at home. She’s always stressed out and miserable, and takes it out on her husband so he is too.
It was not that long ago that women were told that we were so much more than our appearance and sex appeal, by other women, most of all. It was understood that striving for personal growth, having interests, being well-read would save you from the pressure of constantly trying to be pretty, and reducing yourself to your body alone. I'm not sure what happened in the last 15 years. If all you had to offer the world was your physical beauty, it was an insult.
The number one thing I notice when I travel is honestly how much healthier the women seem, both mentally and physically. American women’s obsession with being men and working has made them stressed beyond belief and it’s hurting their physical health too. It’s rare I see fit women these days
As a heterosexual male when I see a woman who clearly spends a lot of time on her appearance (make up, nails, expensive clothes, hair, etc) I am initially looking at her presentation and I am impressed, but there is no replacement for looking young and healthy naturally. To me there is something unattractive at fake signals, so either you fake it amazingly well and fool everyone or it becomes less nice. Unlike all the ads out there, there are few things that do make you look naturally beautiful. It is sometimes pleasant to see someone who does not overly spend time on their appearance and looks like a natural human, but then I am initially not as interested, because there is this other woman who does look impressive (and fake) It is a losing game overall, standard for womens looks have gone up. For long term men would rather have a true human, spending time on having the best life instead of this fake presentation (vanity), but due to the over sexualization (imagery of attractive women everywhere you look) of society we are stuck here.
I’m a 40 yr old woman who lives in California but I only color my hair.. don’t even get my nails done anymore.. never had botox, no filers, no fake eye lashes.. & only wear minimal makeup. Granted I’ve been married for 20 yrs so not like I’m trying to attract a man .. but seriously I don’t understand the amount of time & money women waist on something that’s not achievable. You’re going to age .. the question is do you want to do it gracefully or end up looking like Madonna 😳 Also competing w/other women by buying expensive crap is the dumbest thing ever. Just workout & dress in a way that compliments your body. Be kind, generous, interesting & funny. The rest literally doesn’t matter. It’s a waste.
And it's affecting them younger and younger. There are teenage girls already petrified of wrinkles. It's a very small number of extremely rich people, mostly men, who are the only ones gaining from this.
To be honest, I also fear getting old (I am male): Though what I fear is the physical degeneration and chronic conditions and joint-failure ect. which will come with age.
@@Rufio1975 It helps, yes. But I am not looking forward to the indignity of old age, especially since I've gotten a preview of it thanks to a permanent toe-injury from slipping in a staircase when I was 29. The sheer reduction in life-quality is simply staggering. I now look with fear on old, frail people, trapped inside their bodies until death. (and I don't believe in any sort of afterlife, which makes it even worse; just more and more pain, and then death)
Trying to jump straight to the top of hierarchies. Listening to what they feel without question. Bending the knee to the tyrant in their minds called neurosis in exchange for a sense of comfort that traps you perpetually in an adolescent mindset.
@@brianmeen2158 I find it hard to conceive of that scenario because men, in general, are raised with different values. Males are often the gender more willing to defend their country, even at the cost of their lives, and are known for their readiness to sacrifice themselves for others. For instance, in a cinema shooting incident where an assailant took the lives of over 20 people, several men acted as human shields to protect their girlfriends. Throughout my entire life, I cannot recall a single incident where a woman was willing to make such a sacrifice for someone else. Men tend to be more resource-efficient, exhibit lower debt rates in demographic studies, and a significant number of minimalists are also men. Chris is just willing to offer someone inside in biological/evolutionary topics, that some people do not like, because it holds a mirror to their narcissism and consumerism.
@@brianmeen2158why does the conversation have to shift to the other gender for comparison? lets keep the conversation on the same topic then switch later yeah?
One of the things I love about my wife is she wears little makeup and actually asks me for fashion advice, as she can't be asked with all that. Every morning she throws on some clothes and asks me if X goes with Y, and I often have to tell her no, traditional satin with exotic patterns does not go the Hello Kitty Tee...
She's asking you what you like because she wants to look good and attractive for you. Shows volume about how you mean to her and how she wants to keep you. Good on ya mate.
Louise says all this with a full face of makeup including rouge and mascara and sees no connection with the predatory beauty industry? There are videos out there that will instruct you on how to sculpt your face to resemble almost nothing of innate bone structure, aquiline prominence, eye width, etc. I suppose she doesn't understand the ramping-up of any field; whether that's competition among men to be the strongest or women to be the prettiest. If the market is lucrative, a company will go to any lengths to sell you that snake oil.
This is dumb an argument as "well you have a job and buy food so who are you to criticise capitalism?" We can only work with the system that currently exists. It's totally fine to play by the current unwritten rules of the system - to "play the game" as it were - while also desperately wanting those rules to change.
Funny that you assume those things to be separate enough to care for one but not another. You can't fix men's mental health without fixing the whole system. And women's mental health is 50% of that system
Me too. Women have had life on raise mode since the dawn of man kind relative to men. There’s a reason why nobody has ever said “be a woman.” But there has always been a saying, “be a man.” Man are expected to achieve success regardless of what their situation is. Where as woman aren’t expected to achieve anything.
@@sjndfot Let's be honest now, that certain 50% you're concerned about has received a hell of a lot more attention than the other for over two decades now. We have to even the playing field.
(1) I am of the nature to grow old. There is no way to escape growing old. (2) I am of the nature to have ill-health. There is no way to escape having ill-health. (3) I am of the nature to die. There is no way to escape death. (4) All that is dear to me and everyone I love are of the nature to change. Gauthama
I know this is only a clip of the whole conversation, but it’s amazing to me how she saying what women do well, she’s a woman and I guarantee her nails look fabulous right now and he’s saying oh what women will do, which is usually pushed by the fact that men find us completelyunattractive after a certain age and they feel that they still are. It’s just strange. It sucks 46 struggling with it and it’s hard.
Don't believe this. The right man will find you attractive. At any age. I'm 47 and I still get a lot of attention. It surprises me, but then again, I exercise and sleep right. And I love looking put together. And my hair is silver and long! But this has more to do with your heart and how you carry yourself. And more importantly, why is male validation so important? Just do right, live life and age naturally. That's a life well lived.
My mother used to say "sofrer, sofrer, para mais bonita parecer" while she was trying to sort out my awfull, actually beautifull, curly hair. Which means you have to suffer, suffer pain to look more beautifull. Something like that.
For the life of me, as someone who empowers the dignity of a person, I cannot comprehend why women have become ravenous at tearing down another woman they fear being inferior to. Actually, no- I realize their behavior has been left unchecked both virtually and realistically, and envy coupled with mobs allows for horrific consequences towards their targets. Add mental illness (histrionic personality disorder) as an exponent to the damage being caused. God help us.
Ask yourself this. When a woman has spent a large amount of their money to improve their looks, what is the most likely comment made of the results? Be honest. "Oh my. She looks so much younger!" or "Wow. She had some work done."
In my 50’s I’ve developed even greater appreciation for women who display their defiance of this hyper competitiveness by wearing minimal to no makeup & not spending ridiculously on manicures & hairdressing. There’s something more attractive about the attitude of confidence in their own self worth & natural beauty this displays. Women my age who try too hard to defy their years often wind up presenting as being desperately in denial & in need of too much external validation. Neither of which is attractive.
I think that a lot of women pressure eachother to be groomed to within an inch of their lives in part because they see good grooming as a sign of someone having their sh*t together, and that's what they want to be around, because it makes them feel better. Being around a human with their sh*t all over the place and with poor hygiene is bad for all of us. We instinctively move away from it - just see how you react to sitting beside a homeless person who hasn't washed in months. The hair-dying and wrinkle-erasing is similar: women want eachother to do it because seeing their peers getting old-looking is frightening and depressing - it reminds them that they're getting old too. I think at least part of the pressure to look good and young comes from a collective instinct to keep the 'tribe' healthy and full of vitality because it benefits everyone in it.
True, but at the same time it's all fake, doesn't matter how healthy the tribe looks if it actually isn't. All the makeup and plastic surgery on the world doesn't correct for a bad diet, sleeping habits, exercise etc.
I don’t think a lot of men realize how much money women spend on themselves for maintenance” purposes lol. It’s absolutely ridiculous, and shows you why their consumer rates are so high compared to men. Only men can understand true contentment💯
@@Goatlikeitornot because they all dream to get a 10% guy, while they have to stay bitter, because they will never get one of them and the narcissistic mentallity of women are 10/10.
90% of what women spend is on groceries, clothes, baby items, etc. You know, on their families. Whereas men spend their money on electronics, gambling, alcohol and cars. You know, on themselves.
@@sibyloftexas That’s a lie, even though women do take on the primary spending of households, statistically single women spend far more on the dollar than they make compared to their male counterparts. And in the cases that women do spend for the household, a greater chunk of the money comes from their husbands savings rather than their own. Men on average make around 10,000$ than women but only spend more than women overall only by a small margin, which says alot.
They struggle because they did not adapt compartmentalization well. They can’t self sooth to difficult situations at the same rate that things which disturb them come into their lives. The ones that actually DO compartmentalize effectively become cold and detached. Have yet to meet a woman that was perfectly well adjusted to this plight. Hormones are a hell of a ride
This doesn't pertain to all women. Many, many, many women look for happiness outside of themselves. It isn't there. I tell young men that if they meet a woman and she is not full of joy, genuinely happy, and likes who she is, to move on. You can't make her happy.
@@mad_muhammad See also - anyone online selling you "financial advice" - ask yourself why those guys aren't using the get-rich-quick scheme for themselves and instead are selling it to other people.
I never understood why women compete and sabotage one another the way they do. As a man, i want my friends to succeed because if they do well it'll come around. The worst advice women give is on dating. Literally just be ok looking, in shape, and dont play games that make your partners life worse and you'll get your dream man. I'm thirty, have been with somewhere between 20 and 30 women, and will literally marry the first one that isnt a liability. Sounds callous but thats all us men want. Looking good helps, but men know its only gonna last a few years, if he's thinking about the long haul, he's asking himself if you have the character to be a good member of the family - long after you stop looking good. Once you hit the age those looks start to go, men will start to ignore you, not superficially, but because they'll assume you spent ten years minimum failing and doesnt expect the pattern to change.
The world somehow convinced women that taking care of their families is somehow beneath them and in fact misogynistic. And that pursuing a “career” is much more important
its not that its beneath us, its the fact that its so undervalued.. also, having a career gives us freedom. this wouldn't be a problem if there weren't so many men that control their wives by reminding them they have nothing to fall back on f they decide to leave. that anxiety isn't worth it.
@@limitlessvictoria The only people that undervalue it are women though. You say so many men treat wives like that but you know its not true. Women are so free to pursue any life path they desire. And why would anyone marry a person like that. Surely there would be red flags! You talk like its still the 1920’s or something🤣
@@jimreplicant you'd be surprised how many people live/ want to live like its the 1920's. and yes there are husbands that treat their wives like that and I know it.
@@limitlessvictoria yeah but you said “so many” which is a ridiculous claim considering how many single moms there are out there. It cant all be the guys fault
She’s right about the expectations for women’s maintenance. Men have told me/critiqued me on my having my nails painted or wearing plain clothes and less/no makeup. Of course men say they like that…but it feels like only if your like stunning . Average ladies with a ton of other great qualities get missed because they are used to looking at very done-up women and social media photos.
"If you only did the beauty routine of 40 years ago, you'd look really bad". As a man, I disagree. Wear women's clothes, have a basic hairstyle (with longish hair), wear simple makeup with earrings. No nose rings, no face piercings, no blue hair, no cosmetic surgery, no tattoos, don't bite your nails. That will put you in the top 10%. As Chris alluded to, most of the extra stuff comes from other women tricking you into looking worse.
That is exactly what i do at 42 and never suffered from a lack of male attention… i guess in part because of Eastern European genetics but in part because i do this very simple “beauty” routine. The idea of getting shit injected in my lips or face absolutely terrifies me. Women are too brainwashed.
Any body modification/manipulation is a turn off to me. I noticed women that are legitimately attractive do very little modification because they don't need to stand out to get attention.
@@TuffLuv1984 I really didn't want to squabble over "10%" versus "15%" versus "5%", although I am not convinced that a woman in the 90th percentile of looks is going to make money off her appearance. That would mean that 10% of our female population can do that right now. Professional actresses are probably like 0.003% of the population, and some of them aren't attractive. But due to our culture, the bar has been set very low. No need for botox, implants or other extremes.
She says men don't notice when women have manicures and stuff like that, but I notice when they do their nails, all of them, I find that attractive to the point of having preferences, and I don't think I'm alone in that, even if it's more of a peripheral thing for most guys. I tend to notice details more though, so maybe I'm just weird.
@@danielquintieri Some Gods are better than others. Best to take responsibility for your thoughts, actions, behaviours, and habits. Don't leave that for the Supernatural to come fix after the fact.
@@ekinteko you just dont understand which is fine, no one ever said dont take responsibility for your actions, if God didnt make this life please explain to me how everything exploded from nothing
Life is an endedless hunt for happiness , comforts that never comes and then you die. People put so much in the materila life that when it vanishes they get depressed. It is difficult to think beyond the self and society when you were born in it indoctrinated.
I dated a stunning beauty of a woman for 2 yrs. It didn't matter how many times I told her she was beautiful, she couldn't stop with fillers and botox....
I completely see what you’re saying . It seems when I experience high level women not all the time but there lives are so different . Nothing really wows them in life. There glued to there phones . No real personality . Anything they do it’s the top the top to prove\show people . She had to be the best yet drove a Honda fit lol . Only ate take out
Women think that cosmetics make them look better, but it's just a false appearance... no matter how many times you say it, it doesn't get into their heads because when they're "painted" they feel more beautiful and that's where the problems start... believing they are more than they really are, from that moment on they are no longer realistic and become narcissistic. Imagine if the rules changed in beauty contests... all cosmetics banned ;) we could see what real beauty is!
An observation a friend of mine made was how every time he talked to a girl online they were always in their bedroom. An anecdotal example i know. But if most young women spend most of their free time in their room festering on snapchat and instagram then its no wonder many young women are constantly unhappy.
It's so true all the makeup, clothes, hair, etc is for girls and gays. I don't do all that. I work out every day, so I don't bother dying my hair etc when I'm sweating in the pool etc. I have no problem with the men. My body is rock solid. The women hate me because I look better than them without all the fancy clothes and hair dye and face paint ha.
hahah. This is funny. My wife will change her nails and even hair sometimes and I wont even notice. She will have a zit on her face and be obsessing over it and I don't even see it. Wife goggles perhaps ? Now when she shows skin, and the more she shows, that gets my attention.
Interesting to hear something like this from a womans perspective, and I think shes right with pretty much everything shes saying. I have to say I underestimated the rivalry between women, althoug I wasnt ignorant to the fact. But whatever the reasons are, theres alot of pressure for women and girls, and it makes me sad. For me I like natural women and without surgery, to think someone would do surgery out of pressure is deeply concerning me.
Many years conversation with wife (now ex, not cause of this conversation). Her: “I’m going to get a hair cut” me: why? You look pretty.” Her:”I just want to.” Me: “you have gorgeous hair. Long as possible please” Her: (returning with short hair) “you never give me compliments.” Me: “uhm.” Her: “do you like my short hair (asks 200 times). Me: “I guess so.” Her: “unsupportive bastard! Liar.” Rinse, repeat. Now I have a pet dog.
I trained as a hairdresser and my straight male married mentor had a female client come in. She had long beautiful hair. She wanted it all cut off. He could have done it but instead made excuses about time allocated but if she still felt like that next visit he’d book out the appropriate amount of time for it. I asked him after why he didn’t do it as it would count as a restyle and earn him more money, after she left. He said, “her demeanour suggested she’s had an arguement with hubby, first thing ladies do after an arguement is destroy something their partner likes out of spite, most notably their hair. If I do that now, I will lose that client long term cause she’ll probably hate it after things cool down and blame me.” Since that day, any client who seemed angry and asking for lots of their hair cut off I made excuses about time. If they were really persistent I’d say “okay we’ll take a little more off this time” and just do the usual, no more, no less. Advice that’s never steered me wrong. I have witnessed the aftermath of a less informed member of staff who did cut a lot of hair off. Glad I wasn’t in her stylist shoes that day. The girl sat crying in the chair realising she made a terrible mistake. Even though the style suited and looked good stuff like that knocks your confidence as a stylist. It’s not nice.
I work in education and I have a theory. Studies show that there’s been a decline in mental health amongst girls. I think it’s likely that the more popular you are the more likely you are to be chronically online as a girl and the more likely you are to have poor mental health. So, some girls end up trying to be cool by claiming they have bad mental health. I’ve seen this play out at schools I’ve lead, and I’ve even seen it go as far as the popular girl starting to cut which led to a lot of girls cutting
They go online see that they are just like any other person so they will try to find whatever makes them different. True for boys and girls, just look at the rampage of non binary, trans or whatever else they call themselves now just to get attention.
My wife had short hair, just above the shoulders, and I loooooooved that look, she looked so hot with short hair. I don't think we care all that much about long hair.
I can only speak from within my bubble of experience, but in that experience no one is a bigger enemy to women than themselves and other women. In all my years I have never had a single male friend or associate display deep critical analyses on anyones looks or outfit. This is to say that neither I or any other guy i know have expectations for our women.
Obviously because the beauty industries prey on women's insecurities to sell them products that artificially and temporarily give s a sense of worthiness of admiration, desire or confidence. The real difference is where does it all draw from? From authenticity of self expression and joy or from insecurity...
Men respect women who r confident enough with themselves to not need enhancements. I’m turned off by plastic surgery and cosmetics. Genuine beauty is not just on the surface but is derived by our choices.
My personal hypothesis: in developed countries like US and UK, the gender pay gap is still present not because of employers' discrimination, but because women invest in the wrong thing. Modern women spend hundreds of dollars and enormous amounts of time each month on beauty stuff. If these resources were invested in self growth, the same women could advance in their career enormously. P.S. I am a woman. And I am just shocked at this phenomenon. I don't do nails, don't dye hair etc. and I am so far forward from the rest of the women around me. Most of the people surrounding and resonating with my values are men. And this is really saddening
Motherhood is what's responsible for the pay gap. You know, decades of labor the human race needs to exist that they don't get paid for. Women who are childless make as much as men.
I've noticed a few times of 45+ year old women not dying their hair, so they are showing gray. They actually stand out from the crowds it's so uncommon.
This is an interesting hypothesis, actually. Obviously it won't be whole explanation but maybe a small part. I tend to think that motherhood is still the biggest factor. There's a somewhat related theory for men that I've heard Louise talk about before; that it was only the monogamy enforced by Christianity that enabled the industrial revolution, because before that men invested all their resources in "the wrong thing"; ie attracting harems, which greatly held back wealth creation.
Another brand called Brandy Melville did something similar, they closed many of their Canadian stores when they realized a lot of diverse women of "diverse body types" were buying and wearing their xs/s sized clothes. Money be damned.
