The Most Ridiculous Urban Legends 

Lorelei keeps absolutely nailing the editing. chef’s kiss.

Dave:"At the time of writing, it's nearly halloween." Simon: "its January!" Marge: "it's May!!" That was fucking golden.

Dave's parents are savage! 😂 I'm Black (this is relevant, I promise). When I was about 10yrs old, I was playing around on my mom's keyboard piano, just pressing random keys. She came into the living room and said something like "You know, real Black musicians only play using the black keys," and went back into the kitchen. I carefully began picking away only at the black keys. Shortly thereafter I hear my parents giggling together like children in the kitchen. I was appalled and embarrassed at the time, but now it's one of my favorite absolutely hilarious childhood memories. 🤣❤️

The whole, “Halloween” “January “ “May” bit broke my brain for a second.

Oh my god, Lorelei during the “It’s May!” portion 😂😂😂😂

I fancy starting a new urban myth about Simon. He has a secret channel that no one has yet discovered. The content of the channel is instructions to access a Swiss bank account, the funds of which were supplied by Raid Shadow Legends who have been sponsoring him on a long term basis.

My siblings and I used to say that our mother's Halloween costume was Great Britain because every year, she would "tax the colonies".

Lorelei, 10/10! The Alex bit was hilarious, and clearly took some research, and the quitting clapperboard guy was brilliant. You’re my new favorite editor!

Just got info on the brain blaze back log. Halloween script, January recording, May editing and release. Love the team dynamic!!

I work for emergency services. Please don't do that on your phone.

There is one case where someone has poisoned a family's Halloween candy. But it was the dad who murdered his children not a random stranger.

Lorelei, I adore you. “Poison is bad.” “Yes, they are.” 😂😂😂

Written: October Read: January Uploaded: May Gives some perspective on the work that goes in to these videos

2:30 - Chapter 1 - Emergency services phone charger 6:55 - Chapter 2 - Spiked halloween treats 10:25 - Chapter 3 - The beast of hackney marsh 14:05 - Chapter 4 - Mysterious organ harvesting 18:05 - Chapter 5 - Carrots help you see in the dark PS : 18:15 - Smash that carrot button PS: All hail the glorious return of *Tangent Timer*

Waaaay back in 1978, when I was 7, I was eating pop-rocks when the kid next door told my grandmother that “some guy” had eaten pop-rocks with Coke and died. That was the end of pop-rocks in our house. It turned out that the urban legend was that the kid from the Life cereal commercial (Mikey likes it) had eaten pop-rocks and Coke on a dare, then he exploded. Total nonsense, but lots of people stopped buying pop-rocks because of the tall tale.

Lorelei is the master at her craft. The Edits are the main reason I watch.

The commercial that played immediately when the episode ended also started with, "Hello, Alex!" How??? It meshed in seamlessly. 😂💀

Lorelei, you are absolutely my favorite editor. All of them are legendary, but I think that you bring an extra something to your videos. Perfection.

My Dad used to say “eat your carrots, because you never see a rabbit wearing glasses”!

I was expecting the "Everyone has AIDS" number from Team America World Police, so the Family Guy bit actually surprised me!

Lorelai's editing is why I watch these vids rather than listening to them like a podcast. On point. Astarion addition yields extra points. ;)

Funny thing about sharps containers: they're designed so that people can't just randomly stick their hands in them. June Weinstock is from the town where I live. She suffered severe brain injury from the attack and had to be in a care facility for the rest of her life. Mob mentality is truly terrifying.

Simon's genuine mirth during the carrot bit delighted the hell outta me. And well done, Dave. You legend.

I Love the kinda banter that goes on on this channel, between Dave, Simon, and Lorelei the Editor X3

I just love Lorelei's editing and her Australian talents of sutley and tact. Oh Dave I gotta know, did the carrots help you see in the dark? What? Its not like Dave is going to read it or anything.

7:09 "But at least, by the time of writing it is nearly Halloween"....."omg, it's January"..... "it's May!!!!" This was just so perfect!!! And the timing that it's actually the first week of May, so 8 days ago, Lorelei couldn't have used that meme, is just amazing😂😂😂

As someone that got stuck with a random used needles changing the trash at work (the small t-shirt bag swung as I tied it and stuck my twice,) I feel Simon's discomfort for used needles. I had to spend months getting tested and retested for various STDs including HIV/AIDS. Also had to get a a number of vaccines for a bunch of stuff. Thankfully I didn't get anything, but still...

Dammit Lorelei, that stray Discord notification SFX was devilish.

Love the writer tangent timer.

When my son was an infant, he literally did turn orange! Carrots, Sweet Potato and Pumpkin were the main culprits. For some stupid reason, I didn't think of this, even though I know you can make a plant turn any colour you like by adding food colouring to the water. After a VERY long night at the hospital, the Head of Paediatrics came to us and asked "Just by the off chance, does your son eat a lot of orange foods?" I replied "Yes, it seems he only likes orange foods." "Well" said he, "I am fairly sure your son does not have Jaundice, but rather, you have dyed you child!" I felt a right idiot and went straight home and gave him some peas and butter!

The whole "Almost Halloween, it's January, it's May! " but got me stitches for minutes! Maybe 10, to the point my bf said breath if u wanna live 🤣

Simon is further behind on scripts than I am on child support.

Tip of the hat to Lorelei, especially the "hello Alex" bit. Perfection.

The razor thing in Halloween candy goes back to the 1960s and it was supposed to have happened in New York. There were also reports of LSD and things injected into candies for a few years in the late 60s. In New Orleans, where I grew up, no reports. I sometimes think it was an outgrowth of the actual painkiller poisonings that happened a couple of times.

After seeing what people were willing to believe in 2020, I am never going to assume people are too smart for an online scam ever again.

I was born, grew and still live within a mile or two of Hackney Marshes. I've played 100s of football matches, run lots of races, gone to gigs and managed events on it. I have never once heard any mention of a Hackney Marshes monster. I've googled it though and does seem like there was a police search mission w/ helicopter in 1981. I'm hoping the 2012 'sighting' wasn't real or if it was, it wasn't a prank because the marshes is right next to the London Olympic site in Stratford. They had snipers on rooftops and armed police units all over. Someone mucking about in a bear suit could've got put down.

Dear Dave, Thank you for what might have been the hardest and most cathartic laugh I've had in at least three last year. Bravo!

Am i remembering correctly that years later it came out that the person who was the origin of the poison candy urban legend had actually poisoned their own kid's candy in an attempt to collect life insurance on them? I swear i stumbled across that on some true crime show a few years back.

I HATED the carrot one. I got glasses in the 3rd grade. We were poor and this was a bad thing. So, my mom INSISTED on having me eat as many carrots as possible. This led to my afternoon snacks being carrots cut into disks. Do you have any IDEA how many old, rubbery carrot disks ended up in my desk? Carrots pretty much make me sick now.

1:29 now I want to know how many hours the video editor has in baldurs gate 3

The random Discord notification during "Parenting Stuff with Fact Boy" completely threw me for a loop. LOL

Dave does have a hell of a sens if humor!! 😂😂 I love it!

"he can't even speak!" 6:01

Lorelei I love your editing ❤❤❤ you make it much better. I just had a crappy day and your editing made it much more enjoyable and funnier.

3:15 I would think it could also be tied to the fact that even an old GSM cell phone that’s not activated or on a network can still dial 911. This is the first I’m ever hearing of Blackberry being able to only able to make emergency calls in power save mode, and as popular as Blackberry was, it was really only certain execs who used them vs the general populace.

I see Lorelai has fallen down the BG3 rabbithole.. we will pray for you

Omgoodness…a pharmacist I worked with (and in in the USA they actually spend enough time in school to get a doctorate in pharmacy) believed the whole “charging the cell phone call” thing. 🤦🏼‍♀️

Omg, Simon cracking up over the carrots had me falling out of my chair laughing

The only case of tainted candy I know of was a local one to me in the 80s, where a person slipped double edge razor blades into candy apples. And the person who did it was allegedly mentally disturbed, and accused local kids of vandalizing their house. No idea what happened after that, but it was reported on *after* Halloween.

Dave being able to see because of carrots dropped me. Laughed so hard.

HOORAY, for Simon! I Nearly "Nearly Fell, on the Floor" GET, HIM on the 'Comedy Circuit" 🤣🤣

Fab stuff. Also, Astarion!! Love him!!! All the editing and memeology here was spot on!!

18:14... Now wiping coffee off my computer monitor... Kin ell Dave... That was dark.

The U.K.: gets call about a cryptid; sends out almost half a hundred officers. The U.K.: repeated reports of abuse and involving a missing person; "They're fine."

I don't know how that discord notification noise got into the video at 10:19, but it really freaked me out for a second because I didn't even have discord running.

We need to talk about the unspoken cultural phenomenon that is "dad tax"

bleeding discord notification sound effect. you know what you did. 🤣

And Dave cannot see the timer... Ha!

As a small city/ not quite country boy, and a loner/hermit whos biggest fear in the world is being trapped in the middle of a panicking crowd thats pressing in on all sides while having no, or being unable to reach an, exit, the idea of permanently settling in a city like LA, NY, Seattle, Chicago, or any other city that takes longer than 30 minutes to travel from one side to the other even at the slowest of times is quite unthinkable to me. I honestly belive i would attempt living off the land or going homeless before i would attempt to make a life intentionally in a midsize to large city. speaking of whether or not london is nice or not that is.

Lorelei, Dave will be very upset when he sees the meme you represented him with. 😂😂😂 Funny and Dave would enjoy it.

Simon: I've got the best job, just sitting here in a comfortable room with tea reading a script Also Simon: I'm so far behind at work

Im pretty sure that most, if not all, parents tax their childrens food. I also call it the Dad Tax.

I was definitely not expecting a baldur's gate clip, but i'm happy to see it

The blind joke got me lol, never seen that one coming.

Lorelei crushed it with the editing. Love you all, and thank you.

Today’s episode was brilliant. Just what I needed

The whole Carrots bit had me laughing so hard I almost fainted XD

Editing in this episode is *chef's kiss* good.

“Tangent Timer”! Gold! 😜😂

2:23 Lorelei, I see that Sens8 clip, that was a great show 😂

that was ONE HECK of a way to open the video simons editors >.> i'm uh just watching it and am about thirty seconds in lol

The opening bit reminded me of Charlie the Unicorn 😂😂 lalalaaaa candy mountain 😂😂

The editor really doesn't like Poison, and I found that exceptionally funny. Kudos.

I have to say first the editing on this video is hilariously top notch!! Then I have to say HEY!! The reason here in the UK there's modern folklore, stories, rumours whatever about strange beasts, maybe escaped exotic pets etc is because the scariest thing you'll encounter across the UK is perhaps an angry Bull/Cow or maybe a Horse!! If you're really unlucky potentially an Adder but even then you've got to be extremely unlucky to die from a bite! Especially as kids when you go out exploring, there's a vast expanse of land, maybe a big woodland!? Blatantly there's gunna be a Wolf Pack hidden away or perhaps a small population of maybe a big cat etc. I also mention the escaped/released exotic pets & big cats because that DID happen (Simon has done a video about it!) Whilst the arguments for & against some of these big cats surviving & evading capture to start a small population is absolutely up for debate! There was a time when some of these "Beasts" could very well have been an escaped Puma say! Then folklore & Chinese Whispers does its thing!

I don’t think I’ve ever been so early to Simon video. Good shit mate.

Super stoked there is a back log of episodes to be excited about

This one was worth the wait 🤣

Ouch! Wicked memeology, Lorelei! What's the next level up from a Doctorate of Memeology? Supreme Being of Editing? Love it all. Keep them coming! Oh, and ask Whistle Boy for a nice, fat raise! It's well deserved, and he can afford it surely😂

Yes! Loreleis editing is the greatest, and with the tangenttimers aswell. Niiice.

Every pony happy now editor you have my ❤.😂

I’m in London right now and I’ve seen four Manticores this morning. Although… they could just be foxes being cheeky and I need to get a new carbon monoxide detector

About a million years ago I was a chat and message board host for AOL and I worked in the Urban legends chat room and chat board. Brings back some interesting memories lol

Honestly the editing is on point

The thought of poor young Dave being told that carrots help you see in the dark cracked me up because my best friend who happened to have two artificial eyes from a very young age also tried eating lots of carrots as a child so that she could see in the dark. I am also trying to figure out if anyone tried to tell me this or if I just accepted that I was night blind and carrots would never fix the issue

A wild Astarion clip has appeared and i love the editor for it as it made me laugh.. 😂😂 🦇🦇

After not watching these videos for a while due to life getting in the way, the first thing Simon says is making me go 'things haven't changed then'. Missed the out of context intros!

The editing for this episode 🤌

Tangent timer is rolling while he’s reading the script.

Hearing Simon saying his nan saved everything after talking about her cutting off chicken heads had me VERY worried where he was going with his anecdote xD

I subscribed when Sam was editing. This was amazing. The retakes inserts made me giggle.

Yes Bois let's blaze

This is good editing

Ooo someone messed up the tangent timer! lol love ya ❤

"Very polluted"... "But it was fun,though". Simon, oh Simon.

The needles were supposed to be small sowing needles. Stuck into candy bars.

Speaking of lipstick in bathrooms after passing out, I was reminded of the famous “Welcome to the wonderful world of AIDS” urban legend that was also spread via email in the 1980s.

I never get in this early. I can't wait to hear Simon mock the stories that kept me awake at night when I was young and stupid

Tangent timer…..EPIC!!

If the government is pushing mcdonalds, you know who owns the government.

Says you! I just nodded off for an hour in the SeaTac airport. When i woke up, I'd been plucked balled by a wig maker, had all my organs harvest, and had been left propped up on cender blocks just outside of Salt Lake city. All I got for my troubles was a t-shirt that said 'I got harvested and all I got was a crappie t-shurt' that didn't even fit. (It's a 4xl)