The Queen And The Art Of Keeping Your Mouth Shut 

I've been watching a lot of tributes to the Queen. This one was by far the best. It made me a little teary. Like you, I still can't believe she's gone:(

Humility, composure and patience are great virtues.

I was more and more impressed with the Queen over time because of her quiet power. She just got on with doing what she needed to do without drama, and I didn't realise how refreshing that was in this social media world. Her death affected me more than I expected, like a lost family member. I'll miss the stability and duty she offered. She was a formidable force and we'll feel her loss.

Especially today, I think of her words: "You come together today in St Thomas church in New York united in sorrow by the terrible events of last week. Each and every one of us has been shocked and numbed by what we have witnessed in these recent days. But none of us should doubt the resilience and determination of this great and much loved city and its people. Men and women from many nations, from many faiths and from many backgrounds were working together in New York City when this unimaginable outrage overtook them all. At your service today, we think especially of the British victims. For some of them, New York was simply a stopover on some busy travel schedule. For others it was a workplace of excitement and of opportunity. For many it was a familiar second home. These are dark and harrowing times for families and friends of those who are missing or who suffered in the attack - many of you here today. My thoughts and my prayers are with you all now and in the difficult days ahead. But nothing that can be said can begin to take away the anguish and the pain of these moments. Grief is the price we pay for love." Isn't that beautiful?

It’s really strange , I’m 60 , and she’s all that I’ve ever known , it feels so personal, the sense of loss.

Whilst I believe everyone should have a voice, I also believe you must use this voice wisely, succinctly and thereby give your words value. People, I think, can be guilty of oversharing these days, valuing their opinion over all others, never listening. One of the Queens maxims for the Royal family was " never complain, never explain". And I think it may have been Winston Churchill who said "It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt ". This obviously does not apply to anyone who is being abused.

I wonder if she kept a journal? What an interesting read that would be.

Great video, You said it beautifully 😍 ❤️, thank you. ❤🙏🇬🇧🇬🇧🙏 I feel I am learning more and more as I get older that it is sometimes much more important to LISTEN rather than speak. When we speak too quickly, most times we just regret the tone we said it or even the words we used. It is much less likely that I find myself saying; " I wish I spoke up." There will be times that speaking up for ourselves and others is important,and learning to know when and how to speak out has made me a much more empathetic, kinder , and a more compassionate person.

What a thoughtful video. Another, and entirely credible, aspect of The Queen.

Thanks for this video. I’ve felt more emotional than I expected at the Queen’s passing. Her stoicism and self restraint are certainly admirable attributes.

I remember my grandfather used to say "silence is golden" and I agree with your viewpoint about not needing to always express your opinions.

I've always been indifferent to the Royal family but I was actually gutted to hear of her passing, it's such an end of an era. She was like the nation's Grandma, in a way.

I'm American, but my heart was a little heavier when the Queen's death was announced. My heartfelt condolences to everyone who feels affected. 💝

Btw, in my opinion keeping your mouth shut is not inherently a good thing if opening your mouth could lead to change, equality, and the improvement of others’ lives, especially the tax payers who pay their salaries. The monarchy should be bowing to tax payers for what they are given! I don’t understand the purpose of royalty in this day and age? What is their function exactly?

I don’t know if I’m tripping out or not, this was probably the most profound sentiment I have seen about the truly profound life the queen led versus our personal biases we have from our perspective.

Love your capacity to have this very fresh and direct and decent and down to earth take on your topics, uncluttered by ideas, yet from a deep and lived understanding of human personalities and how we relate to each other. So refreshing and so helpful! ❤️🙏🏽

I think that you are extremely naive about her relationship to the govt. Either you believe in democracy or not. Also, to turn a blind eye to the suffering of millions under Western imperialism the way you are doing is frankly, disgusting.

I disagree. This woman should have used her platform , her voice, to make real changes in the U.K. and the world. She sat neutral while atrocities were committed

Thank you for sharing your thoughts- as always I find it deeply comforting to listen to your videos.

21 years old and she kept her promises. I’m no royalist but I had a healthy respect for The Queen and can’t believe how emotional I felt when she died. Maybe it’s because she reminds me of my mother and mother in law, she suddenly became human standing there in her drawing room. Steadfast and strong and full of grace. RIP Queen Elizabeth.

This was such a thought provoking video and message. Thank you for putting in to words what we see and admire in Queen Elizabeth. She looked passed people’s weaknesses and reputations. You can literally see live in her eyes.... even for Trump...which solidified her Sainthood to me 😂.

i find it a bit shocking and insulting. The whole "keeping ones mouth shut" thing isnt some noble thing, its a common thing in business/sales and when famous people are dealing with public relations. its an intentional neutral stance to get the most supporters and offending as little of them as possible (all entirely self image based reasons). Got any opinions on elizebeth visiting jallianwala, or on her refusing to speak ill of jimmy savile after it came to light? She did knight him many years before hand. She's not a nice person, narcissistic really. People not allowed to eat dinner till she has the first bite etc. Bizarre really

Can you please analyze Aaron carter's family?? Please there's alot of good content one can learn from his entire family as many of us come from family backgrounds like his without the fame aspect

I've seen a lot of people on social media bashing on the queen because of the atrocities the British Empire has committed. This is a lot more thought-provoking. I think how much England themselves generally loved her speaks for itself. As someone who lives in America where a lot of politics involve ugliness and anger, I enjoyed this video a lot.

Oh! Zoe trust you to be the only one to bother to say something utterly wonderful and helpful on the death of the roots of our global family tree, Queen Elizabeth II, she was not only the longest serving monarch but in my opinion the greatest, she was watchful and progressive and seemed a very loving human, we will never see someone as special and significant as her again and I'm so happy that she ruled in my living history, thank you for sharing your lovely message it brought tears to my eyes, RIP Queen Elizabeth II.

Preface - criticism of the monarchy from an indigenous and colonised perspective. Totally OK for anyone to ignore if you are grieving and don't have capacity. I'm not so sure. That consistency and peace certainly served the interests of some, but it really didn't for some of us, not at all. I'm an indigenous person in a country colonised by Britain and don't have many fond feelings for any of the monarchy, I accept that others do and those feelings are real, but it's very, very hard for me to knowing what colonisation did to my family. It's a harm that has rippled out and has had effects that remain today. There is a good reason for the pain and criticism and demands for apologies. I find it pretty distasteful that anyone has argued people should put those feelings aside so they can maintain their comfort in admiring her. How does that connect to the experience of victims of covert narcissists? It's right that sometimes people don't speak up for fear of abuse or bullying, and that's been demonstrated this week with people who see the monarchy as oppressive either silencing themselves or facing abuse, criticism or being censored. Was her silence diplomacy? Or was it about maintaining power? When someone has put themselves in a position to rule and stand above others, do they not have a responsibility to say something and to speak on behalf of those they say they represent? Maybe she did in private? I hope so. I know diplomacy has its place and it's important to maintain a dialogue, but the truth means something too. I am not convinced any kind of supremacy has a place in ethical society. How humble can someone be to wear a crown, be surrounded by servants and have their face on currency around the world? I just don't buy into any of it, all I see is a facade to maintain power. I see an emperor with no clothes and I'm generally not someone who keeps my mouth shut. It's quite possible that if she had apologised, acknowledged, made amends that my feelings would be very different and I would have space to see her fondly. But that didn't happen. She did make an apology in the 90s for one historic incident in my country, but it was entirely on the palace's terms.

I'm half Jamaican and have many unprocessed thoughts and feelings about this. A Jamaican relative was made an OBE, which is nice I suppose. Whilst the Queen herself was ultimately harmless, I still think the monarchy as a whole has been overall extremely damaging to not just the former colonies but Britain itself, and the kinds of behaviours and actions we as humans have accepted as just "part of running a country" and being "patriots" and "loyal subjects". Yet there is something to be said about the death of the Queen. It's almost as if big Ben got destroyed or something. She's just always been there and now she's gone, it's a bit hard to imagine. Extremely big shoes to fill in an institution that's long past due for retirement, in my opinion.

She was very well groomed to take the position, and clearly comported herself with the British manners one would expect. But I cannot overlook her lineage which she spent a lifetime upholding. She kept her mouth shut because had she not, she would have to answer to a very long list of crimes against humanity perpetrated by the British monarchy for centuries. From Ireland to Africa, India to Israel/Palestine, and everywhere in-between -- the British Empire did so much atrocious harm. And please stop to consider the wealth that they've acquired while their "subjects" were starving. Please.

In the words of Ben Chew's father: "You need to learn the power of the unexpressed thought!" ... which I just violated, of course... :p

I am an American and teared up when I read the news of her passing. I admired her grace and how she worked until the last days, appointing a new PM just 2 days prior.

Our beautiful, dignified Queen x a sad time in our country 🇬🇧

Great to see you back. I’m an Australian and share your sentiments about the Queen. I’ve been thinking this week about how we could all benefit from being led by her example. Her was a life well-lived

Really lovely video, it is still a bit strange that the queen has passed, she was always there . But it was interesting to hear your perspective and have to agree she has been a fantastic ambassador. She'll be missed ❤️

I think the Queen had this a bit easier as she had power behind the scenes to make changes and other people were talking on her behalf in various settings. In the real world sadly silence is taken as submission.

Kept her mouth shut about Prince Andrew hey

Thank you for sharing. I'm an American and admire the queen immensely for her heartfelt leadership, commitment and diligence to the British empire through war and peace times. She embodied so many good qualities setting an example for all to see. Most of all, I greatly admire that she wasn't afraid to publically speak her mind and take a stand for her faith in Jesus Christ. See you soon Queen Elizabeth II. 💗

She had an incredible life and story. And I agree that she did her job well as Queen. As an American, I can’t imagine supporting a monarch. However, I am a huge fan on this particular queen. That said, I’m not a fan of her kids. Charles, Camilla, and especially Andrew can buzz off. Lol.

Thank you very much. The Queen approached everything with class and respect. She will be missed.

Thanks for this video. I agree and the way the Queen was in public is something to be admired in our world of being inundated with social media. I often feel like I'm overwhelmed with people I know personally and interact with who have kind of become addicted to being very polarized. People often alternate between trauma dumping and virtue signaling without any regard to the idea that having a discourse where people can actually have a calm discussion and agree to disagree. Instead it's my way or the highway and too much over sharing where people don't trust themselves and their own logic and intuition but rely on validation sometimes from absolute strangers who really don't care about them. I'm Native American (Lakota Sioux) and it was interesting to hear what you said about colonized people. As a colonized person there have been things that happened that were not good. Things could have been done much better, obviously. The Caribbean people are not Indigenous to the islands however. They were enslaved and transported to the islands and helped contribute to the Carib, Arawak and other Indigenous people's extinction- they had been living there since the Mesolithic. I always find that performative and hypocritical. The Nigerian professor who wrote horrible tweets about the Queen's death is another example of this same hypocrisy. Number one she is an immigrant and living on unceded (because treaties with the original tribes and inhabitants we're broken by the U.S. govt) land. She is a colonizer herself. She believes because she is from Nigeria and black that she has the same status as descendants of American slaves and that's not true. The whole displaced Indigenous diaspora often used their history on another continent to erase Native American rights and even our existence. So there is a lot of hypocrisy and showboating by people in public who are narcissistic. Their feelings over everyone else as you said. I admired Queen Elizabeth. She did her duty and was an iconic figure through many decades. In the U.S. we have seen President Kennedy' assassination, Nixon's resignation, many corrupt warmongering Presidents (today is 9/11 in the U.S.) and the election of Biden who clearly has health issues and the raid on former President Trump's home in Florida. So politicians are in one minute and out the next. They change like the weather and are not always admirable in their conduct or personal lives. Queen Elizabeth was above that and provided a constantcy and service to her people and to the people wherever she went. Even while she was dying in Scotland she got up and got dressed to meet the outgoing and incoming Prime Ministers. She never got to retire and died at 96 still working. I don't know anyone else who could compare to her and I think she will go down in history as a remarkable Queen and individual.

The Queen really didn't have to say much for afterall, she's Queen; who's going to force her to speak? With all due respect regarding the Queen's demise, I struggle to understand how she is praised to the high heavens what with every female Royalist uttering the same lines ie "She was my role model ever since I was a child." Or, "She's been a great inspiration to us." However, the praise is senseless and baseless when they don't clarify how the Q was important in their lives nor specify what it is/was the Q inspired them to do or be. In what way is/was the Q a role model to all? She certainly didn't work her way up to anything. What was she a role model for? Was it the way she spoke (did she?), was it the way she dressed? What inspiration did she offer? To be regal? At most I can say that she was "successful" in keeping the monarchial tradition. I must mention that she was never involved in any scandal and thank goodness for that because Philip the Nazi was embroiled in that plus her 2 sons gave her enough to deal with (or not). One is accused of being a pedophile who continues to sleep with his 63 teddy bears and throws a tantrum when the bears are not arranged in proper order. The only time that the Q gave in to the people was when they demanded that the Q leave Balmoral to at least pay her last respects to her daughter-in-law who was quite possibly murdered. Of course she loved her 🐕 🐶 but as with her sons, she never attended to their sh!t. I'm not saying anything new. I don't wish to debate on the topic and am merely giving voice to my thoughts. ✌️

Some people don't feel the way you do about the royals/queen, and it's not wrong for them to express that.

I'm really against worshipping people with power

I am Canadian and my grandfather had the honor of being the queen’s driver on Royal visits to my country and news of the queens death hit me like a ton of bricks. Even all these months later it seems unbelievable. She has always been the steady hand for the entire 50 years on this earthy. Rest in peace your Majesty

Hello, thank you for sharing your thoughts and sorry for Australia’s lost as well. The Queen will be missed for her wisdom, humility, loyalty and integrity. I wanted to hear from you as well. 🙏♥️🤗

The Theresa May in that speech wasn't the same woman who was prime minister she seems much nicer.

Great example of behavior we can all learn from for our own lives. Thank you - great video & topic.

I hope you're feeling better ♥️

I totally agree. She was exceptional human creature.

Down with monarchy all the way I swear I mean really omfg. Congrats on the effort but nope

Absolutely gorgeous cat! I very much enjoyed your video.

My mother God rest her soul was the same type of woman. Although her humility, grace and wisdom weren’t played out on a world stage; they were in play in every interaction in her life. It was incredible to watch. I’ve spent my life trying to emulate my mother. But, it is my opinion that, that type of person is born not made.

I imagine her lady in waiting Susan Hussey along with Philip played a most important role in keeping our Queen sane. It really does take more strength to stay quiet but also made us eternally curious

She was a remarkable lady , she will be sadly missed 😢 💔 There will never be anyone like her again.

She set an example of integrity, wisdom and strength for all of humanity. One thread of her magnificent tapestry is the respectful bow of her head as she placed a wreath in Ireland in 2011.

R u serious? 🤔

I wish I could sense as you do some of the people around us who live to soothe peace in our lives. Being raised by a narcissistic father gave me a sixth sense to detect malfeasance.. I am learning through your videos how to see some goodness in this world, and I thank you for that with all my heart, you are a life saver @liveabusefree ! ♥️

This was the best, most thoughtful, beautiful tribute to your Queen, THE Queen, I have heard thus far. Thank you 💜

I hope that Australia will become a republic now.

I’m in the United States & I cared about her passing 😞🙏 RIP Queen Elizabeth

U look very princessy with that dress ...

That’s the reason a love your analysis, never disappoints, thank you so much! I am sorry for this great loss, we never knew not to have her, now we will go on without her. Let’s pray the world will be better with King Charles III.

The whole racism thing has now become a grey area because many people are commonly insisting very random minor/often benign things are "racist", suddenly. There's a lot or controversy over what is racist now.

With the new peacock documentary out I would love for you to cover the Casey Anthony case. I love your insights and this has so many layers I think you could cover. So many perspectives and interviews to analyze!! ❤❤

Thank you ….I made the same point about her regarding colonial times, unfortunately there are too many people who are not educated about history giving their opinions. She was the quintessential feminist; a leader we won’t see again in my lifetime.

I was gutted. She was Queen for longer than most people were alive. We somehow thought she would live forever. But I thought she wrote her Xmas speech on her own.. Opening Parliament she reads the PM's words. She looked like she was dying when she met PM Liz Truss. Her hand had turned black & she was disappearing.

Our Norwegian king and queen are the same, royalty are taught to behave like this publicly. What they are like behind closed doors we don't really know. Something that's interesting is Prince Harry and our Princess Märtha have both found narcissist partners now. So were they groomed as children as well to accept narcissist behavior?

I'm from the US and it was so sad to me knowing she was gone. I'm 70 and she has always been around and such a great role model. A very wonderful woman that I truly respect. She will be missed. She always seemed to be a peaceful woman and her ability to be quiet when everything around you is chaotic is quite an admirable character to have. But when she meant business she had such a way to get her point across without saying a word.

I miss you and your brilliant videos. I hope you are doing great and that you will have time to make more videos. Your view on things and explanations are educational and entertaining to me. Plus you are kind and sympathetic 😃❤

She was such a present and I will miss her. Although I’m Swedish, British history has always been a huge interest and hobby of mine. May she Rest In Peace ❤

during covid our government willingly sent out "do not resusitate" orders to carehomes and respite places .. our elders seen as worthless/expendible, those allowedto die refused contact withloved ones ... i for one will not forget this happened

Thanks for showing up, you are great, and it is a comfort to hear from you. Even though I am not a Brit or in any of her dominion, I loved her and will always remember how gracious and classy she was.

The Queen managed to get on with almost everyone. What was her secret? being the head of a literal monarch that ruled over the world for hundreds of years...I mean....lol

PS If Jada Pinkett Smith doesn't have the wit or intelligence to get Chris Rocks jokes then that's hair loss.

We are always told that we have to have a voice and speak up, challenge. She could keep her mouth shut because she was a queen but life is not like that for the majority of people.

Thanks for the new video, Zoë!

I’m not a fan of monarchies but Elizabeth’s life story is compelling. She had a heavy position thrust onto her and spent the rest of her life doing the job almost perfectly. Her presence during WWII alone could make a fascinating movie. The rest of her family should give it up and get real jobs because they simply don’t have the character or gravitas to carry on.

Zoe!! I miss you and hope you are well 💖🙏🏻 Hope you return soon! x

Lovely tribute, can’t wait to hear the Chris Rock Will Smith video!

Disclaimer I’m American: If there was ever going to be a monarch for 70 years, we were lucky it was Queen Elizabeth II. I’m def not a monarchist, I loathe the institution, the idea that anyone should be deemed better than everyone else but she ended British Imperialism which is one good thing. She left the world better than she found it and that’s something. She also reminded me of my own grandmother who was born the same year as Elizabeth. They shared the same mannerisms too. I hope she rests in peace.

Still waiting for the Chris Rock/Will Smith video!!

Back here to wonder how you are. What’s going on girl? I’m worried.

Did you do a video on Chris rock and will smith in the end? I can’t see it on your channel?

Just speaking for myself personally, if my son or their friends/associates were known pedophiles or sex offenders/traffickers, there is nothing that could stop me from holding them responsible and accountable for their actions. What you do in your own home and family, should matter more than what you do in the world. Otherwise, it’s just a facade. I don’t think her shutting up about this does anything for those victims and the families of those victims.

4:06 the first time she looked elderly to me…it was really weird. I have a feeling William will be the one to break the mold and be more of an open and friendly king. :) Charles has always been quite and exactly like her so don’t see that changing lol

That was one Sunday sermon I needed to hear. Thank you very much. It was super interesting, especially given the fact that malcontent Brits fleeing monarchial rule created America. The USA seems to have come full circle with the wealthy 1% as the new Royals, running the government while having none of the inherent responsibilities of a sovereign.

I'm an American and I cried when I learned she had passed. It was very sad.

I've been doing that a lot more, before I speak, I think, does this really need to be said, if so, why? Is there a benefit of saying it? If not, I take a breath and smile.

So great (clap clap clap) as usual to hear you express your ideas. Yes, this truly was a great topic. I am from the US so know less than most about your dear Queen, so remembering her cheery disposition and her beautiful smile, along with her perseverance through so many decades (and Prime Ministers) is quite remarkable!

It’s been a while since you last posted. Hope alls well x

Thank you for this video. I'm obsessed with the Royals 😍

I expected her to live past 100. I wonder if she was coerced into participating in the Great Medical Experiment.

A really interesting discussion, thankful. Generous to the Queen, and challenging for us that could tend to see all the fall out and not see the nuance. This way of "keeping her mouth shut" was a way of being which evidently worked well for the Queen; it was something she was able to achieve whilst staying balanced, and not losing a sense of self. I think there's a problem because people tend to see the possiblity of such behaviour, and then idealise it, idolise it, and enforce such behaviours on themselves and others, IE, force themselves or others to be that way, rather than letting people _be themselves_ and live their own lives as best they can. (I mean, I'm guessing many of us would love to be this self controlled, dignified, authentic and popular -- not to mention whilst remaining rich and powerful!) Although the way the Queen did things works well for the Queen, and she maintains dignity and authenticity, it evidently hasn't been so healthy for her children or grandchildren. Harry seems to be the most healthy of them, attempting to live his own life with his own values, just as the Queen did, with just as much value for others _but in a different way._ It's horrible seeing Charles at the moment, being so stressed and snappy with his servants etc, it's embarrassing. But here's the result of someone who has been controlled all his life and who the Queen's way of being didn't really work for. It is fake for him. He has a different sort of personality, and needed to live his life differently. Not that Charles isn't able to be dutiful and see the bigger picture, but that he'd do that better _in his own way_ if he had the strength to, or was less beaten down by his family. I'm loving how Harry exemplifies this ability to do things differently, but still with honour and dignity, right now. I often think, by not speaking up, the weak ones who come after us will get hurt by the same things we ourselves were able to manage with dignity. So there's definitely a place for dignity and restraint, where it's possible, but also needs to be someone saying what isn't ok, and making radical changes, _now._ I know this is necessary in the christian church, for instance, where people are being abused and destroyed. I think we need to remember how valuable we all are in our own unique ways, and how much we can learn from each other, to enrich ourselves rather than to diminish ourselves by being compared/comparing and being (found) less than. You're not doing any kind of comparing or idealisation in this video, but I just wanted to add my thoughts to the discussion, having thought about and enjoyed what you've said. Thanks!

I hope everything's alright

This must be one of the best channels on RU-vid. I love your videos. Your presentation and your accent. You are so well spoken and have a wonderful way of explaining things.

I agree. Quiet power is rare and to be admired.

In life I think it is about getting that balance between knowing when to speak out and when to stay quiet or rather keep our own council. Over sharing can weaken us - I think. And there is something healthy in not complaining and explaining ourselves.

Watching your older videos as a refresher course while you're away. I hope that you are ok since the Covid symptoms you describe sound miserable. Here's best wishes and prayers for your complete recovery!

All the examples I have ever seen of the Queen Mother, she has always been so gracious and neutral about things. I admired that so much about her. I'm sad to see her go. RIP sweet lady.

Even as an Irish person, I can understand that Brits are mourning the loss of a huge, archetypal figure. However, it's easy to keep your mouth shut when you know you're quite literally 'the Queen'. One word and the thing is done. Sure, she led her firm competently, but that firm just happens to represent the prolific bloodshed of colonialism throughout history. One could set slightly higher standards for a Head of State, surely.

So good to see you! So sad she has passed. She’s been an amazing queen!