No contact works!!!!! It hurts so much though Bc you want to try to convince him or her to stay , but it works !!! So hang in there guys ! COACH LEE I LOVE YOU AND YOUR ADVICE. My ex literally came to my house to just drop off a few things after doing like 2-3 weeks of no contact and he POURED his heart out to me telling me how much everything reminded him of me and how he missed me and ugh I’m so happy right now ! I got my ex back . Thank you coach Lee
@@claudiawelch7577 i was in no contact for 1 month ... it killed like hell but i hung in there!! N after month i was starting to heal he txt me eventually...
I want to tell all of the community that I followed your advice and 3 1/2 months later he came back to me and told me he needed me, wanted me and wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. Thank you Lee!
It’s sad that you become so emotionally unstable and think so less of yourself that you’re willing to be with someone who doesn’t want you. I was there, and it’s been over a month of NC and I feel sooo much better. I’ve been working on myself and seeing what we both did wrong in the relationship and realize I will be just fine without him. It’s about ME and what makes me happy. Trust me guys it really does get better. Even if you never get them back, you learn so much about yourself and relationships and it’s a great life lesson. You will be ok! ❤️
You are strong. I literally feel my heart sinking into my chest and i have to breathe through my mouth because it feels i can't get enough oxygen to my lungs quick enough
I'm the one who Brooke it off because she wasn't wanting me the way I wanted her. My own love became toxic for me. This was the 2nd time that I tried going to her but now its been 2 months with NC. She is with another guy but yet she keeps looking at new every time I go out. It confuses me but I'm not giving into this anymore. It hurts but I want me to come first now. It just sucks that I wanted a future with her but now I'm alone.
This guy is a legend. I went total NC with my ex of 4.5 years after she walked out forever. 60 days of radio silence later she caved and sent me a message saying she loved me, was not over me, thinks of me constantly and that all of her memories are about me. we've now got a date to talk about making our future work together. I'm not out of the woods but I'm going to try to get the love of my life back forever. I've worked on me, I've from learned my mistakes, and the great news is she wants a future with me. Can't say how difficult the NC was, I was crushed, but I held my nerve and she wanted a future with me. This woman is my life, soulmate, confidant, best friend, lover and everything in between. I'm hopeful for the future. Thank you so much coach Lee!
My ex has no kids, I have three aged 12 and 14. She's lived a child free life for 17 years and I've had to juggle everything to try and keep everyone happy. It's been really tough and the lack of quality "us" time had been our downfall. However that changed this time as after 6 years of my ex (kids mother) being in rehab for alcoholism and finally finding her own place, she is now sharing the kids 1 week on and 1 week off, so finally we get time to ourselves. I can't tell you how tough it's all been but even on the weeks when I have the kids I have some child minders and we now make time to get out together, we go to squash on one of my "on" nights and dancing on another, I feel we get a lot more time together. I'm now a few weeks in to being back with my ex, who is no longer the ex and things are really great, but she wants us, I want us and we spend a week together on my off weeks and make a huge effort in between. Really happy and confident about the future this time around.
Tony Davis you got this! Don’t forget to be working on yourself. You’re the most important person in your life. You need to be emotionally and mentally stable for you to have a successful relationship. Stay strong! ❤️
Update: Day 11, i feel really good and it's really weird since i was insanly in love with her. Haven't heard from her yet, but i'm kinda worried i'll lose my feelings for her completely. I still love and care for her still, but what if i don't anymore when it's been a month?
Update: Almost a month, i can confirm that i haven't lost my feelings and it's been an roller coaster of emotions lately. But, as far i've seen it looks like she misses me, because she listens to my songs on my soundcloud, break up songs on spotify, checking my social media every now and then etc. Hope she's reaching her breaking point soon and texts me.
I believe in this process. I'm using every bit of strength I got to stay NC . It hurts and I feel like I'm so close to picking up that phone. Coach your voice is literally all that is keeping me going.
Damn I did the same but she contacted me also but she said it was over and then texted me today bc she seen me with another female and got mad wonder why shes mad???
To me people like you are just as essential as doctors and nurses. Mental health is just as important as physical health and you are helping me stay sane during this difficult time. I just want you to know that your work makes the world a better place and that you’ve helped so many people. Thank you for what you do ❤️❤️
I’ve followed Coach Lee’s advice from just about day one. Gave my ex the break up, never broke no contact, worked on myself. Not even sure how many days before he reached out- probably around the 2 1/2 to 3 month mark. He went from saying some extremely hurtful things to me at the time of the breakup to thanking me for being patient because it was taking him so long to get the rest of his things . At this point I don’t think he would be capable of making the necessary changes for me to consider taking him back. But I’m enjoying the process and am almost amused at how accurate Coach Lee’s predictions are as to what my ex will do next. His rebound appears to have crashed and burned really quickly, and now he’s messaging me every day or two with some random message or question. I reply with a friendly brief answer. I have a feeling he’s working up to an apology. Stay tuned...
I used the NC rule and it worked. But I want everyone to know, if for some reason they don't come back, you get stronger everyday of NC. So keep up the good work, and you will feel your heart mend as you wait. Listen to coach Lee at your worst moments, he will get you through. And remember, there is always somebody out there that will fit your needs!!!
I do not want him back.... He never respected me. I am working on myself to be the better me and that is the revenge I will get if I ever encounter my ex again. We all deserve loving, healthy relationships. Thanks coach Lee!
2 weeks of NC feels so heavy, but thanks to coach Lee. Everyday feels a bit lighter. Watching your videos on repeat 24/7 everytime I feel like giving up or messaging him. Currently in a LDR set up. It's so difficult when you can't go them. This pandemic really isn't helping.
I am about 2 weeks too...not sure anything will ever happen with him...some days are easier than others...but it progresses toward the easier...stay strong 🌺
If you are meant to be and if you work hard enough to get them back, it can and will happen. It did for me, worked hard..very hard and you 110% HAVE to change for YOU. Sometimes a break up is the way you know that you truly love this person..and that they feel the same way deep down.
It may be hard to do no contact or to believe what he’s saying but it really does work it’s probably one of the hardest things to do but it’s the best just to prepare for the future if you get them back great if you don’t you’ve probably already prepared by doing no contact move on and let them realize it was their loss even if it takes years!
Friends that care are the best. Especially when they are patient when I go on and on and on and on and on and on about my blubbering woes. Thankful for them! Cling to them. They know you and love you.
Coach Lee. My ex text me last night after 2months NC..i kept strong and feel like the prize now..show strenght. Thanks for your advice. However I will only consider meeting up if they suggest it xx
Your words are a Revelation! I finally understand why my ex ended things and why he didnt want to discuss it or work on things. You have brought me piece of mind. Thank you!
I'm going to repeat myself again, Coach Lee is the best! It's exactly how people need it, keep repeating your statements, those phrases that are so obvious, but for people who are panicking and being in such a miserable life situations, your thoughts and conclusion base on your experience aren't obvious. People really not available mentally to understand what you are saying, is because it is so hard to believe that no contact might work. Me personally, was thinking to contact my ex after a month of not communicating, as I thought he's going to forget me and give up on us. So I thought I'll show up and say let's get back together. Very silly idea, as he's not ready for me. Thankfully, the evening before I was about to contact him I found this channel. Listen to Coach Lee, keep repeating his video, try to concentrate, as his statements are golden! Thank you Dear Coach Lee!
@@pearlarzate29 We got back together after 3 months of no contact. Another 2 years together, and total is 6 years. I would recommend not to fight for anyone. With your person everything will go smooth and natural.
@@alanaa7379 I'm so happy for you! I wish I could feel the same you did, but unfortunately I fucked up by breaking NC on the 7th week exactly and I think I blew my chances.
Everytime I have doubts he will reach out, I read your comment, and I know he will not forget me and not give up on us! Fills me with hope and motivation to carry on with no contact. Thank you! I will let you know how it goes
Thank you coach Lee After 2weeks of no contact I am back with my love. If it wasn't for you I would not have been able to understand how no contact works nor would I have been able to stay strong. I am so grateful for your expertise. Thank you so very much.
Coach Lee has given the best advice during the darkest period in my life. I highly recommend this channel. So inciteful & far better than other 'coaches' on RU-vid!
I'm trusting no contact because I know this is all I can do. Your videos coach Lee, gives me the motivation that I need. We've spent every day together for the past 2 years & I love her so much. She came over 3 weeks ago to pick up her stuff & still left more stuff here. I'm hoping that's positive. I'd do anything to get the life back that I had with her. I'm taking this day by day & it's so hard at times. Hope we're back together again J! ❤
Steven-L. We spoke before. Your chances are EXCELLENT! Keep up the no contact till the proper time, and enjoy each other. Don't forget about Coach Lee’s Workshop. know it's really difficult and I've certainly been there. I don't know if you are aware, but Coach Lee has a live workshop called "Relationship Reignite." It's an incredible learning experience that I just can't say enough about. It focuses on saving a relationship from a breakup/separation and then keeping it after. It includes a coaching call each month for 6 months. You can talk to Coach Lee's team about it. I think the person for this is named Johnny and you can make an appointment with him to talk about it at myexbackcoach.com/relationship-reignite. I think you'll agree that it's an incredibly eye-opening and immensely helpful experience for you.
So, I got my ex boyfriend back in one week. A little about us so maybe our relationship is similar or different to yours, but I know it’s a hard process and hopefully I’ll share some light 💡. First of all, I want to thank Coach Lee for his videos during my no contact and break up process. They were very impactful. I still watch them because I want to be aware, prepared, and validate my own decisions. I’m 48 and my boyfriend is 55. We’re both successful entrepreneurs. I own a private school and he’s a general contractor. As a matter of fact, we met because I was expanding my business and he did my build out. In less than a year, I’m almost outgrowing my space. So, I’m very independent. Prior to this relationship, I didn’t date anyone for 7 years. I was laser focused on my career and purpose. The moment we met, I felt a magnetic pull towards him and he felt the same. We have a strong connection. However, he’s more in the physical world and I’m more spiritual. He’s jealous, which causes the arguments and leading to breakups, and I’m not really jealous. One week, he would say he needed a break then we got back together. Then the following week, an actual break up. We had a mutual agreement to break up, but he said “I don’t think this will work”, then I said ok…can we both agree it’s over? He said, yes. In the past, I would reach out with a text or so. However, the energy shifted this time, I went into no contact immediately. As a matter of fact, I was relieved and felt so free. I felt a sense of freedom. I even met an old friend who we used to hang out and talk, but my boyfriend wouldn’t let me because he thinks the friend is a threat. Anyway, so no contact. Within less than 24 hours, my ex texted me…. “Hi, How are you? I’m trying to upload a floor plan for the nail salon (owner is my nail tech who’s he’s doing a favor for me because he loves me) but I don’t know the password. FYI. He is not making money from this project. So, he admitted that he asked about the password because it was a “gateway” back to me. I didn’t ignore him. He called and spoke for 3 hours but not about our relationship. We’re still in the break up phase. We kept it light, fun, and with an occasional “how did you sleep?” and small talks to get the feel about our emotional state. I used to text him things everyday, I stopped. I don’t initiate anything until he does. He said I’m stubborn. We would talk every day but he can sense I’m happy with or without him. When he called, I was always working on my business. I looked good, according to my friends. I was healing, accepting and at peace. He knew that my spiritual practices makes me strong. He wanted to see me but I had to think about it because I had meetings scheduled and I wasn’t sure if I was ready yet. Then he said, Friday, it is…. He is a very busy GC but he said his Friday is wide open for us. I agreed to meet, but I was very cautious and reserved. When we met, I was still in my car, he said he was excited to see me that wanted to attack me while I was still inside my car. When I got out, he was happy and went to kiss me but I turned my face and he kissed my cheek. He wanted to hug but I gave him a one sided arm hug. On top of it, he knows if I ever pay for a guy’s meal that’s a sign I don’t owe anything to the date. So, while he was in a conference call at the restaurant, I paid for the bill. When he came back he asked me, “Did you pay?” I said yes. He said, “I’m @ucked”. He knew I was easing into the relationship. When we got back to my house to work on the permit, the moment he shut the door behind him, he attacked me from behind with a tight bear hug. We had a talk… He said…. I miss you. I felt a part of me was missing. I miss seeing, talking, laughing, touching, and smelling your presence. I felt a sense of loss and pain in my heart. I called your name at night during the no contact period. So, I asked him… Do you want to save this relationship? He replied with a kiss and said yes. I said I don’t want to break up anymore because it’s emotionally exhausting, but every time, it makes me stronger and I’ve become desensitized. I asked him if he’s going to improve on himself by becoming less jealous and if he’s still wants to work on our relationship. He said yes. Then I said, I’m willing too. He made a funny joke. He said I had to work on my jealousy too. At first, I was thinking 🤔 Am I jealous? Then he said, “You’re not jealous enough”. Lol 😂 We both have great times. Most of time, we’re like 2 kids again, laughing and understanding each other since we are both business people. Bottom line, I highly recommend watching all of Coach Lee videos and watch them again and again until you feel the power within you to carry on and be better. If you had a great relationship but only have a few issues then your ex will come back. Especially if he knows you’re a high value person and you’re rare….They’ll be back. Be strong, be independent, be kind, be mature, be balanced, be humble when you make contact. Most importantly, be real. Take the time to become an attractive person again. It was also my fault that I allowed him to manage my life which made him get out of control with his jealousy. I should not have allowed him to get that far. So that will be a new change as we move forward. I hope you get the love you desire and deserve. Blessings. Thanks Coach Lee ❤
Quick. CONGRATULATIONS! DON'T forget Coach Lee's Workshop. It's absolutely amazing! know it's really difficult and I've certainly been there. I don't know if you are aware, but Coach Lee has a live workshop called "Relationship Reignite." It's an incredible learning experience that I just can't say enough about. It focuses on saving a relationship from a breakup/separation and then keeping it after. It includes a coaching call each month for 6 months. You can talk to Coach Lee's team about it. I think the person for this is named Johnny and you can make an appointment with him to talk about it at myexbackcoach.com/relationship-reignite. I think you'll agree that it's an incredibly eye-opening and immensely helpful experience for you.
Now that my wife has filed for divorce I realise I wasn't keeping our relationship current. I took her for granted. I feel so bad now. Big mistake when you have been married many years. I used to always wonder why a couple would break up after 20 or 30 years or longer. I think I have some understanding now. Can't hug too much. Say you love them daily. Show them love very often. Keep dating your wife. I want to bring her back. I wouldn't mess up again. She is too valuable.
I’m sorry for what you are going through. I suggest you watch this video all the way through: m.ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-vIKkuOit3HU.html
Listen to this advice, it does helps. It helped me to get myself back and overall improve my life. And after 2 months and a half, my girlfriend came back pretty confident about me. So, it does happen. And I’m sure following this advice gives you the better chance for that to happen.
What I’ve noticed is my ex began to feel me coming back to my old self and the needy, empath I became. Once they realize that you are coming close to being cable of leaving and moving on for yourself not with someone else, then like Coach Lee has said numerous times… They will change! Trust the process..
These videos have calm me to the point of accepting the break up. I love my wife we have a beautiful daughter, she left after a painful argument. It’s been 15 days now apart, the last 4 days I’ve gone into no contact and to my surprise all day she’s been calling me for things she doesn’t have to call for. Hope this is a positive sign because I made all the mistakes at the beginning to the point where she couldn’t stand seeing or speaking to me.
Yesssss no contact does work, you may or may not get your ex back but one thing is sure that you will get yourself,you will understand things as they are, also you starts to love yourself, and most importantly you will have the answer you never wanted but you needed and that is its not worth it for cry for someone who is not respecting your feelings and your love, mark my words spend time with yourself and your family, you will get through this.
man! i know i can get my ex back. i am positive the hardest thing for anyone to do is to remain in a no-contact period. my ex wants to be loved unconditionally. if she doesn't come back. then it wasn't meant to be. i can only imagine the beautiful girl after her that might love me unconditionally.
The breakup between my boyfriend and I is just a week old, but through your videos I have relaxed, and grown confident in myself...I don't know what the future will bring..I would like to get back together, but I know this is on him...and I will respect that.
I found this video as I was searching for advice to help me during this difficult season of my life. I always read the comments for feed back, I want to say thank you. It takes courage to publicly share personal experiences. This is my first time ever posting, however your words have provided me with HOPE. Thank you all & God Bless
@@jodynelson1728 Make yourself a prayer list to God. Pray for it one time. Then just thank him he will answer it. I lost Heather for 3 months. Wrote it down on my prayer list to get her back. We are back together for 3 weeks now. I wish you the very best!!
It’s been three weeks since we broke up but yesterday he emailed me!!! We also talked a bit today!!! Maybe things will keep going!!! Thank you coach Lee!!! I owe my growth to you ❤️
Thanks coach lee. I hv to sent u donation . My ex left me since january 2019. I use no contact. He just reach out to me sept 2 .2019. And now everthing is working fine. So no contact work
@@KasumaResort Hi, for me it is also around 6 months until now. We broke up on the 12th of July 2020 and today, it is the 21st of December 2020. I don't know if I want her back anymore, we said to be soulmates, it clicked in the beginning and besides our arguments, everything seemed fine. Unfortunately she was very avoidant and after 1 heavy argument, she just ghosted me, no replying back to me, no goodbye. It has been over 5 months now after breakup, and for me, the no-go would be if she came back but slept with another man than me. I am not over her yet, still miss and love her no matter what and secretly I hope that one day she will write me that she regrets everything but I doubt that I will see her or hear from hear again in my life.
Listening to your videos really helps me. I listen to them over and over and it helps Calm me down when I feel intense loss. I have prob completely messed my relationship up by becoming not fun toward a 3 year relationship. And a bit overbearing and demanding. I listen to these videos non stop when I have a really bad wave of anxiety and depression from the loss.
I am very excited about the new relationship we are having now thanks to you coach lee💕 I don't know how to be thankful to you tomorrow I will avail the emergency kit it's my gratitude and help me now there keep coming to me and there's a situation I not so sure if I'm not making mistakes.. Keep believing that:if you love, you can love deeper the second time around☺️🌻 and most of the time it's more upgrade and full of happiness
Years ago, I had a BF who broke up with me out of the blue. I didn’t react as he had dreaded. I cupped my hands around his face, and told him I wished him well in his future. He was clearly stunned! It wasn’t about winning him back down the road as much as it was about my own dignity in that moment. But, true to your message in this video, he contacted me 3 weeks later wanting nothing more than to be my boyfriend again.
I’ve gone through multiple breakups with a toxic ex. Over the past three years I have gone through dozens and dozens of sleepless nights and just as many days when the sun was rising I just didn’t want to face the day. Periods of no contact do work to get them come back into your orbit... but be careful what you wish for!!! In my case - each time the reconciliation begins to happen, I see the problems surface that caused us to break in the first place - she and I have gotten back too many times and each time it just proves to be toxic. My advice, follow Coach Lee’s advice, don’t break contact.... EVER. It gets easier guys, believe me. If you are in No Contact to try to get the person back, make sure you reassess what matters to you the most. It MUST be YOU that matters most!!!! Bottom line put YOU first!!!
@@mattcal6423 I see.. so what happened with that, did you guys just not change the bad patterns or something? Or just plain incompatibility? You're not with that ex now are you?
@@naiko6700 she is long gone. She’s causing drama and damage to other peoples lives now. My life is peaceful and I’ve discovered that there are way to many other options out there. Options everywhere.
Hi Lee ! It's Lee MacLennan. I have been a full pledged subscriber. I have been following you every step of the way. I will continue following you cause you are the only coach I have trusted in what you said. You are dead on everything that I am going through. My pain 😢, my break up. I am so happy that I have someone to keep me going. LOVE YOU Lee ! I will never stop listening to you. You have made me become a stronger person. If and when my boyfriend will come back because I am following everything your saying, I will let you know ☺. Thank you ! Love you so much ☺. Don't stop what your doing, your doing an amazing job !!! You're the BEST ! ☺
You're so on point with this video Coach, especially on the fact that they will say (and most likely mean!) things regarding you in the moment that are supposed to be permanent, but will do a complete 180 on their stance in the future. I ate it all up, and it left me so confused.
Coach Lee methods are the best, it has worked for me before, he wanted to reconnect but at this point I realised I didn't like him actually and was just mad/sad to be rejected. So I turned him down, and he looked at me so wistfully as he was leaving :) Now I'm in a very fresh situation and on day 3 of NC. It was just a short thing, so I am not overly invested, I only saw him maybe 4 times. I handled the break up like a pro, with grace, dignity and warmth, I seriously am shaking my own hand to congratulate myself lol. I realised that I feel so much better because I acted from my self worth, so the pain did not go in deep, it was just superficial almost. My core stayed intact. I'm not sure yet if I will want him back but I'm curious if he will react to NC. He was so astonished by my reaction that he literally started pursuing me AFTER breaking up. It felt like a first date. Naturally, I cut it short, politely, tables now reversed, because it is clear to him he will have to be the one making an effort. Good luck to everyone, listen to coach Lee!
No contact isn't always the answer. follow your heart I went to my x wife's job drunk and poured my heart out to her and security kicked me out. Later that night she knocked on my door telling me she loved me and came back into my arms. this was after I was blocked for 1 week. Keep trying is my advice don't give up on your love. Now that she is back it's time to appreciate our relationship! I love u Angeles
i would do no contact 1000 times before i rock up at her work drunk, she must have been rather desperate /have no self esteem to not be totally ashamed of your behavior
I wanted to have the "talk" with my ex. I even called her wanting to set it up. Then I realized I didn't wanna be that guy. I didn't set it up. It's been almost 3 weeks now of NC. Whether she comes back or not, your videos have helped me cope. I have been working on my social circles and going out and meeting new people in the real world rather than dating apps. Thanks for all the advise.
Rachmat Tri not sure what kind of update you’re looking for but im so glad ive continued to stay no contact. It really gives you the perspective you need and otherwise would never get. I still think about him every day but sometimes i will go an hour or two without thinking about him and its such an improvement from where i was. He still hasnt reached out btw
I went with no contact for almost 5 months and we were both at a birthday party at a bar because we have the same friend group. Mind you I have been absolutely killing the gym and look the best I've ever looked and my confidence is at an all time high. I was so sick of the elephant in the room and just decided to talk to her. Nothing major it was small talk how are you how have things been. Shes been drinking ALOT which is her choice. The point of no contact is to be able to move on and it felt so empowering talking to her and not feeling a thing. She had a hard time looking at me. Later that night I sent her a text just saying it was good talking to you hope all is well. She replied with yeah it was and I hope your ok. I said if you ever want to catch up sometime let me know she said maybe sometime in the future. And i said have a good night and that was it. I left the door open and I made my peace with her. Things get better fellas work on yourself and dont rely on anyone for happiness.
My relationship ended and I was left empty inside. She left because I got complacent but my feelings never changed and always believed she's the woman I want to be together forever. It'll be almost three weeks of NC. I miss her so much.
Your videos give me peace. Thank you for what you do. I have hope andencouragemrnt for the future and feel no matter what happens with my ex I will be a stronger, better human being regardless.
My failed 16 year marriage was dependent on his control…the end, he chose, played out as a cold blooded vengeance. It took years of immobilizing fear, terror and anxiety to survive. Then I was diagnosed with cancer…almost a decade in a wasteland since the end. Wtf am I doing entertaining a desire to have a reunion?
I just went through the worst experience of my life having a 9 year relationship end. Things have been up and down and we’ve been together since we were 17. This has been the hardest thing I’ve ever faced including my poor childhood and drug addiction in my past. I’ve lost the girl of my dreams because I’ve been complacent in bettering myself for quite a while. This no contact thing is terrifying, but I’ve been doing it for the last week and trying to stay positive. If anyone has any motivation for me I could really use it.. I’ve had some very deep and depressing thoughts… and at times have felt like I wanted to end everything… there feels like no future could be as good as what we had built already and the idea of starting over is terrifying…
Better up yourself bro. Stay in no contact but work on yourself. Give up on addictions and mistakes that damaged your relationship. Let the girl notice you are changing and changing for good. I have sailed this ship and I know how difficult it is. All will be good. You have brother this side and will pray you get your love if you are deserving. Take care bro
Hey Dylan, how are things now? I hope you feel better and are finding your way to a better place. I am also going through some terrible times, we are not alone my friend. Stay strong 🙏
@@fj4731 If I was you, I would msg her once replying with "Yes I go to church. I saw your msg after 2months and I didn't knew how to react. So it took a day. I wasn't being ignorant. Nevermind you take care and Stay well." Have Chivalry bro. It's a long lost quality. And don't mess up if she contacts. Stay subtle. Don't ask her to meet straight away. Take things slow. All the best bro.
@@fj4731 That happens bro. When you love someone the eagerness comes. She will text you back. Hopefully it happens by Christmas 🙂 Just stay patient. Don't do any panic replies.
@@fj4731 There are videos of coach Lee on how to reply when ex contacts. They might prove useful. Also the a lot depends on relationship you both had, the history you had. So be yourself. Now Let her contact you first.
Thank you so much. He let me go and he reached out on Monday talking about memories that we had and how we cant just walk away from being together for almost 3 years. He didnt really mention getting back together but is this wht he is meaning. Apologies but men speak in riddles...lol! He is 45 and its a LDR. I followed the advice from Coach Lee and never contacted him after he requested the break up and Coach Lee was right. He reached out
This is day 2 of no contact for me. My ex-girlfriend just left me and I have very little hope that she will return to me, but I will update this comment if it happens. Good luck everyone else who is in the same boat.. :/
I have a very unique basically divorce situation... its been almost 2 years and he moved in a rebound within a month of breaking up... my son calls her momma now. but after following your videos i can see this is an artificial relationship that is mimicking the good and the bad of our relationship.... he kept my son from me for over 2 years but i can see the reasons now even though i have huge resentment for it... we are getting into a stage where i am getting my custody back and he is allowing me to have phone calls.... i just focused on my son the whole time and made myself a better person and mom...while we were seperated. I put really really hard work into changing wired parts of my brain....I am a over a year sober and have done intense counseling and classes to change. I am terrified he is trying to come back to me and i think i have the feelings deep buried in my heart for him, but i am terrified he will set me up to sabotage my custody again.
I wish I knew about NC on day one he broke up with me, it was terrible and yes panic attacked and texted him 3 times then I found Coach Lees videos on day two and been following No Contact advice and now its been 14 days. Im struggling but Im trying to be patient and watching Coach Lee's video is really helping me to get through the breakup and helping me to get my logic back... thank You Coach Lee I'll let keep you updated
Day 1 of no contact rule..... me and my ex have been on and off since January 2019. We tried again mid 2019 but without taking a break so it was going back into the same situation with no change. She gave the idea of time apart but I was difficult about it and just kept messaging her but now I’ve finally accepted it after reading and watching coach lee’s videos. Shall keep everyone updated.
GOOD MORNING, GREETINGS FROM THE INTERNATIONAL CITY OF HONG KONG. THIS VIDEOS ON THIS CHANNEL REALLY HELP me. i was depressed because my WIFE divorced me BUT AFTER SEVERAL TIMES WATCHING THE VIDEOS ON THIS CHANNEL, i get directions.
Ive been dating this guy for about 7 months and we get along great and everything was going really well. It got to a point where I wanted to see where it was actually headed around the 5 month mark. He told me he really likes me but is confused because he also wants to go off travelling at the end of the year once he finishes University but its also not a certainty, therefore he doesn't know if we should get into a committed relationship because his future is uncertain. We continued things for another 2 months thinking he would get some type of clarity, and when I asked him about it again he had made no progress so I told him that until he gets direction we should have some space as it was unhealthy me waiting around for him like this. He Identified it was unfair on me to be only half in and apologised for a lot of things. Its been almost 2 weeks no contact and Im confused on whether I should move on or rest on this glimmer of hope I have, that he will get clarity and reach out to me. Im a bit lost at the moment help!!!!
Scarcity=Value. You are doing the right thing going NC. During this time apart I would suggest becoming the best you. That way if it works out or it doesn’t, your twice as strong for the next round. It sounds like both of you are level headed and fair. You have value and if he understands that he’ll make it work to be with you, or he wont. Stay strong and keep the faith.
My husband said he wanted a separation in December after blindsiding me the week before thanksgiving with an ultimatum. Get a job or this is the last straw. He didn’t give me the chance. We tried couples therapy in early December. She tore us apart more than anything. I found out he had feelings for another woman, that he still works with but not as closely. She’s married and decided to work in her marriage and encouraged him to do the same. He stopped the physical intimacy for 3 weeks during this time until one night he came home and had been crying. He apologized for putting me through things. We became intimate again, the fusses became less often, we took a weekend trip away. It was a mixed emotional weekend but still enjoyable on both parts. January was a good month. We put our house up for sale. Then I found out he had gotten an apartment solo. I thought we were working through it. We were still intimate and the fusses were rare. Mid February we fussed one night and he went to stay at the new apartment (that had been ready for over a week.) He came back 2 days later and stayed 2 nights, saying he hadn’t wanted to leave yet, and both of which we were intimate again. At this point he’s telling me he still needs a separation. That he can’t get over the guilt of what he’s done. (Emotional affair and they kissed). I had already forgiven him for it. Before seeing these videos, I had suggested a month apart when he said he wanted the separation in December. I thought he needed to appreciate all the things I do for him, which is A Lot!!! Well, 2 months later he is clinging to that idea, insisting now that he needs it and wants to do things on his own. We sold the house in mid March and he helped me move. We had been intimate 2-3 times a week until the move. After that, I went to his apartment to pick up some things and we had a moment. He came to mine recently to help me through a surgery and we were intimate several times the night before my surgery. He stayed with me 2 nights after that. He was very doting and cuddled with me all night both nights. We agreed to start the no contact the day he went home. That last night, we showered together and I hugged him. We looked at each other and I asked him to find his way back to me. He said in a soft voice that he’s really trying to. I drove him home the next day and asked him to kiss me like he was going to miss me. He did. He called me that night to tell me good night, that the time will pass quickly (at least he hopes so), and he will see me in 7 weeks. (Therapy session that lasts 6). He called me after 5 days wanting to know how things had gone with something I was working on. I wasn’t able to answer when he called but called him back later. It was short. Then he text me 5 days later asking about our cell phone password. I text him back but then he called to verify what I had text. A week later I saw him in the doc office. We use the same one and he has a standing appointment each week. The doc knows we are separated and said she could get me in quickly before he got there. I was early and sitting there waiting in the lobby scrolling through my phone. I heard the door open but didn’t look up. Instinct told me it might be him but I stayed calm. I waited a full minute before I looked up and he never moved from the door. He was just standing there. When I did, I said Oh Hi! You’re early. He asked why I was there and I explained and that I was hoping to be out before he came in. He kept his distance and the whole time he was wringing his hands. He looked miserable! I asked him if he was ok, that he looked like he needed a hug. He started forward slightly and stopped and said he thought it probably not the best idea just yet. I said ok, still sitting. He told me I looked good 3 times before saying a quick bye and darting into the back. I left immediately after being seen and didn’t see him again that day. The next week was his birthday (4/29/21). I sent him a movie ticket for a movie I knew he wanted to see the Sunday previous because I knew it would sell out and wanted to get him a good seat. I assured him it was a solo seat. I didn’t hear anything until the next day, which was a simple thank you. I hadn’t expected to hear anything. Fast forward to Wednesday, he text me asking about mail. I said yes I had checked it the day before and had intended to mail it, then said he could stop by and pick it up if he wanted. There were important things in it. He called me. Said we probably need to have a talk anyway and that I wasn’t going to like it. He came over and we talked. He was insisting he wants me to “let him go.” As in lose my feeling for him. That’s never going to happen. It’s like he wanted me to say yes so he can move on to someone else without guilt. I’m not giving him that. One, I want my second chance that he promised with the ultimatum. I did what he asked and then some. But now he’s saying he wouldn’t have left if he hadn’t failed me. I told him to take the time he needs to sort out how he feels and let me know, that I still want him home. He said he’s discovering things in therapy he wasn’t aware of and I “deserve better.” Yes, I do. But I want him to work out what he needs to and be that “better” I deserve. We have been together almost 12 years. We had an amazing bond until October when he found out about a neck injury that could potentially paralyze him. We also had some financial struggles at that time, too, and later found out he had a hormone imbalance. All of this at one time. I can see how it would make one reevaluate their life. He said he found out he wasn’t happy. But instead of talking to me like he usually did, he closed himself off and pushed me away. A part of me wonders if he did this as a way to keep me from having to take care of him if something bad happened. But then there are other factors that make me think this is my fault. (Not completely though. We were on the same page for most of it.) Anyway, I also found out he has tried to date someone else and form a new relationship but said he couldn’t because I was right there in his mind. I’m personally happy about that part. But he can’t seem work it out. He said he’s not the same person. I told him I want us to date to figure out who he is. That I still love him and I’m willing to wait it out because of that part in our vows about “for better or worse, in sickness and in health.” I take my vows and marriage seriously. It’s sacred to me. How can I fix this? I want to grow with him!! I want a future with this man. He’s everything to me and knows it. I’m doing everything he told me (his stipulations). I’m working on me and still keeping the no contact since we met. Please help!!
Thank you Lee for making this video and all of the other videos. This video is probably the most comprehensive one so far. Have followed the no contact rule for 7 months now. It does work but bottom line is she is not coming back. I only had the one conversation with her when she called me on our anniversary. I made the mistake of saying give me one more chance that was over a month ago and nothing has happened so far. I guess I have to get over the loss and move on. Thank you for all that you do for us
This was so nice to hear no lie been on a rough road with a breakup and just listening to the way you explain this helps me so much i needed to hear everything u said
Best advice is this...if a girl leaves you, let go. Trust that what appears dead, really is dead. Do not follow her. Treat her with contempt and distain. Now focus entirely on yourself. Remove all reminders of her, everything. Never go back. Begin your forward journey.
Coach lee i like to thank very very much i mean you pull no punches on the topic of getting your ex back!!! I got so much out of that and im going to take your advice because it seemd so logic and once again thank you so much!!!
I really need help.. Iv done a total 360 in the past 4 months, my ex left me n I was devastated. I learnt that he was with someone else within 3 weeks of breaking up n I pushed myself to find myself again n gain perspective on my own life. I found fun in things n slight happiness again n started to think about him less n less everyday n I felt like my life was back on track. But for the past couple of weeks Iv found myself crying about it again n missing him so much, he’s the first thing on my mind when I wake up again n consumes my thoughts all day. I’m starting to feel extreme sadness again that I can’t control n my heart aches for him but I believe he’s still with this woman n I know he’s not coming back. I am finding it hard to understand after a 3 year relationship that this person could of moved on so quick n in his words ‘hates me’ although I hand on heart didn’t do anything to damage the relationship n it was all a shock to me. I also have had NC for the past 3 months n that’s mostly because he’s blocked me on everything. Please help!! Any advice would be much appreciated, I just want to move on with my life 💔
It's normal to feel bad again after a time doing well, because you are in emotional rollercoaster and it's normal. With time that mood switching is going to end, trust me. When you feel down again is because your brain tries to reconnect you with this person and all the feedback and validation your brain had when it happens. But when you get over those bad days (it's temporary), you are going to feel even stronger and better than the last time, until one day you probably won't want them back. Now, I cannot say why he moved on that fast, assuming he did. It might be a rebound and that tend to fail BC people usually tend to fill their emptiness with people they don't really love. In any cases, don't stick to hopes or ruminations thinking about that person. Write a list of things you can do to improve yourself and make yourself a bit happier every day. Emotionally (meditation, long walks), physically (gym and sports, clean food..), monetary, intellectually... Do little things for you, give yourself the love you deserve. Slow and easy.
Marcos García That truly is amazing advice and thank you so much for taking your time to reply. I know that time is the biggest healer n I just need to feel the motions n build my confidence back up. Iv just been to see a well being worker n she has given me some groups I can go to in my spare time n that will hopefully build my self esteem up. Thank you!
Becky I was married for 19 years and one day she wanted a divorce at blew my mind but in time I moved on and even was happy she did the divorce so you will be fine a new person will come in your life and you will be happy.
As our dear Coach Lee says: "All we can do is all we can do." Sometimes it's so easy do digest and live along, sometimes I wish to just sent that text, make that call, do something. Finding excuses to reach out because I did a lot wrong and trust was broken. But every time I resist temptation and I'm off my emotions I realise this could ruin the whole thing. Taking deep breath, pause, pray, being patient and work on myself is all I can do. So should all of us. Thing will resolve eventually - either we revive relationship with ex or will find someone else. God speed and stay strong.
If you have to go through all this or work this hard, maybe you should just move on. Maybe you need to realize this isn't what's best for you. Even though it hurts like hell. I don't think you should have to do things like this to get someone back. If someone really, truly loves you they won't leave to begin with. They'll realize how much they love you and do whatever it takes to make it work. I don't need someone that doesn't need me either.
That aside I'm not trying to take anything from your videos. They're really great for a lot of people in certain situations. Maybe you screwed up and she left you and you need to get her back. That's different and I believe these techniques will work. I've noticed in my own experience leaving someone alone makes them miss you, and think about you. What you're teaching is correct. I just think people should know when to cut their losses and move on. Sometimes things just aren't meant to be no matter how much we think they are or want them to be. Thanks Lee!
I do not want anyone who does not want me.Period! That is toxic to me, self growth and working on myself is first to me... and his absent makes me work even harder. And you know what I am enjoying seeing other men and having them find me very attractive.
