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The Warning Signs That Love Is TOXIC! - How To Find REAL LOVE | Jay Shetty & Lewis Howes 

Lewis Howes
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30 окт 2024

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Комментарии : 214   
@honeybee4393
@honeybee4393 Год назад
Being honest with our partner can be tricky , ive been in relationship where i walked in with total transparency only to reliased later on it was used against me during argument and the worst part was i started doing the same to him just to get back to him. At the end i realize thats not the kind of relationship that i want to continue to be in.
@RouillierDisguised
@RouillierDisguised Год назад
I had such a bad relationship with myself & life at the time of my 5.5 year relationship that it had to come to an end bc I could’ve receive the love that was trying to be given to me & I couldn’t give it back either. It’s been 3 years since being out of the relationship & it has really helped me see why I behave such a way when I am in one. Over these 3 years I’ve transformed the relationship I have with myself, which has helped me see life differently as well, & I can say that breaking up was necessary for my growth, even if it wasn’t what I wanted, deep down I knew the only way was to let the person who was “supposed” to love me go so that I could learn how to love myself, accept & give it. I am a much better person now & I have lots more self-respect. I haven’t had a solid connection since this relationship, but I’ve never had a better one with myself before. 16:40
@shirleysmith8565
@shirleysmith8565 Год назад
❤🙏🏼❤
@marmeg1118
@marmeg1118 Год назад
Bingo! Both people take care of themselves to be the best for themselves to be able to bring their best self to one another. Love it.
@lewishowes
@lewishowes Год назад
🧡
@obtuseangler768
@obtuseangler768 10 месяцев назад
Like Jay said, there's 3 relationships. The one you have with yourself, the one your partner has with themselves and then the relationship you have between the two of you. You cannot have a strong relationship between the two if either of the people involved aren't taking care of themselves. Lewis and Jay are two men that I can't help myself from looking upto...thanks to both of you very much for all that you share!
@fanahamilton5635
@fanahamilton5635 Год назад
I love that, " Everything you want from someone else, give it to yourself first."
@SJEarthChild
@SJEarthChild Год назад
This needs to be my new mantra
@hbennett5640
@hbennett5640 Год назад
❤❤I needed to learn this years ago.
@brendaalvarez960
@brendaalvarez960 Год назад
Do unto others as you would like others to do unto you
@n26c88
@n26c88 Год назад
I'm so glad I found this video, just started dating and to introduce vulnerability. I haven't been sure about it, but it's wonderful to know that I can talk about my ongoing healing rather than hide part of myself that I fear being judged about.
@sloene72
@sloene72 Год назад
Lewis didnt cut out the part that was meant to be cut out where he says dont need to talk about the book
@sherryj738
@sherryj738 Год назад
We grew up always hearing I love you. My kids have heard this from the time that they were babies. Everytime we talk...we end with I love you.
@SamSung-rv9rm
@SamSung-rv9rm Год назад
I m in that spot. Sometimes it takes great people to make a leap. Great people are gold in my life
@shamshadtarmohamed153
@shamshadtarmohamed153 Год назад
Best response Jay to the question about toxic and conscious love
@kris061000
@kris061000 Год назад
I can feel the healthy friendship love between these two. I like Jay's statment that we need the world with spiritual people in power. And we all know that,at least,in today's world money equals power. It's like taking a different approach,rather than having a scarcity mentality,like Lewis said, where you are either spiritual and poor or materialistic and rich. Why can't one be both. I join you guys on the path to a society where spirituality and wealth are tightly connected and interchanged. This episode as well as the work of two of you is a clear example of it 👏 ❤PURPOSEful life is also a path of happiness. Thank you,both!🎉
@Nutritioneats
@Nutritioneats Год назад
Mind shifter , purpose driven humans making great impact and serving the world with love and humility:) truly grateful
@elyk191
@elyk191 Год назад
My wife and I are going through a separation after 10 years of being together and 7 years of marriage. The first interview really resonated with me and hit hard. Thanks for you sharing 🙏
@annkottackal383
@annkottackal383 Год назад
Pray that God shine his light upon you both to figure out and have a blessed life.
@Christimony222
@Christimony222 Год назад
What was said that spoke to you?! Also, I hope it works out for the best and somehow - the light is reignited.
@pistoreroloco
@pistoreroloco Год назад
Any update on your situation?
@amandaforrester7636
@amandaforrester7636 Год назад
Every relationship changes you, and not necessarily for the better.
@melodydonovan7884
@melodydonovan7884 Год назад
Myself first, it is surprising how few people understand love and a healthy relationship.
@crosscountrymtb3351
@crosscountrymtb3351 8 месяцев назад
Jay, wow - hat off! Everything you say just resonates 100% Lewis- well done for introducing these conversations amongst men too 👏
@lewishowes
@lewishowes 8 месяцев назад
You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡
@jenniferschutz9100
@jenniferschutz9100 5 месяцев назад
Lewis, the next man that I am with, i hope he has a growth mindset like you. I don't think men today realize how important that is. Thank you for all the hard work and being honest with the world! Your work is amazing!
@shazza3099
@shazza3099 Год назад
That's a very interesting point that I always say. There's a very fine line between CARING AND CONTROLLING. I thought I was cared about but I was controlled. For instance: if I went out with friends he would often come to pick me up!
@777VOID-1
@777VOID-1 Год назад
Well sense of caring and then to controlling becomes only in your head as soon as you are becoming weary with the person. It is often seen in female behavior.. it is one's justification for thir falling out of love and now calling caring a controlling behavior. Now I don't say that isn't possible but highly unlikely.
@kayodudu5190
@kayodudu5190 Год назад
​@@777VOID-1 nicely put, but the truth is what you said.kudos
@SMcGrath01
@SMcGrath01 Год назад
Love and attachment are two different things. Attachment out of co dependency and past trauma allows room for toxic behaviours.
@EMuro-wu7uy
@EMuro-wu7uy Год назад
Alot of us envision life in a certain way, and put the other person in a role that's not suitable for them. Instead of criticism let them know what you want from them.
@KathyMcDowell1
@KathyMcDowell1 Год назад
I needed this. I have difficulty knowing what true love really is.
@angiesaga8276
@angiesaga8276 Год назад
Create boundaries,,healthy rules, make my partner aware of my healing, work on yourself first. Vulnerable, openess, and honesty,my Gosh ,that's it! That is a councious love! I want that tyoe of ❤️. . Now, the worst kind of toxic love is , when they use everything against you after you trusted them with your Vulnerability and openness. 😢 That's not love . That's manipulation.
@theauthentictaste2469
@theauthentictaste2469 Год назад
I feel immense pain on daily basis, I try hard to watch podcasts like this, read books about being present and all that. I still feel the pain. These things help me temporarily but I feel deep hurt inside deep pain and lack of self worth. I cannot avoid this feeling.
@shirleysmith8565
@shirleysmith8565 Год назад
❤🙏🏼❤️
@Mariella-k6j
@Mariella-k6j 10 месяцев назад
🙏❤️
@desibarreto7916
@desibarreto7916 Год назад
Wow! Thanks for clarifying this. Conscious love is the way to go.
@romilaagard7621
@romilaagard7621 Год назад
Ummmm😮😮😮 Wao wao😐😐😐😐
@barbyyakubu6718
@barbyyakubu6718 8 месяцев назад
I think love in a relationship has no other definition than true or genuine affection towards each other . Calling it toxic love is because there was no love in the first place but lust and infatuation. That is worldly affection which mirrors itself as true love . There is a thin line between love and lust. The former is spiritual and soul connects not dependent on fleshly desires but embraces you just the way you are and helps you evolves but the later is tangible and worldly . Its desires are attracted to physical attributes like looks, intelligence, pedigree material stuff etc. Because it is not deep connected, with time begins to wear off and losess its savour. This is when the person begins to repel you and starts becoming toxic because he is desiring more than you've offered . But love is like old wine, the older and more distilled it gets the better the savour, desires and value. 😊✌
@elsab5782
@elsab5782 Год назад
A “little thing” that can ruin relationships are the small lies, lies about the tiniest things. When exposed most people doing it tend to down size it and make apologies for it, and later they repeat it because it’s “not that bad” This kills every relationship with time. It took four years for my relationship to really break from this
@realjoelhalstead
@realjoelhalstead Год назад
You can never make anyone feel anything! Your feelings are your own. You are the only person that can feel your emotions! If you don’t have self respect, awareness and control you’re always looking for it in someone else. (The dark side is you can manipulate the situation/environment it creat whatever, the worst kind of “love”)
@hanasloupova9417
@hanasloupova9417 Год назад
In my point of view there is no toxic love. If its love then its not toxic. And if its toxic then its not love ❤
@alexperkins8433
@alexperkins8433 Год назад
good point!!! agree.
@nicatulala
@nicatulala Год назад
agree
@QIKWIA
@QIKWIA Год назад
Brilliant!😂
@itswow3014
@itswow3014 Год назад
Thats the point definitely true.
@itswow3014
@itswow3014 Год назад
Definitely I feel that i am a toxic person in a relationship but my partner always say that no you are not. I see that i always say don't do that don't go there i feel like controlling her and i feel i am being toxic but she say no do fight with me make rules make boundaries for me its not toxic i don't feel bad because i love you.❤❤❤ Yes there is no toxic where there is love.❤️❤️
@Radiance1324
@Radiance1324 Год назад
From vulnerability comes need for attachment. From here the next step is romance which lasts for more or less than a year. During this year, lots of things can happen, such as cohabitation, pregnancy, financial wrecks resulting in fights, blames, delusion, misunderstanding, emotional gaslighting, all heading towards toxic love. Repair beyond means.
@wilmapingret5664
@wilmapingret5664 Год назад
So sad you think like that. Don't forget it is life, trying to do your best and be honest in the relationship is all you can do, it is not easy, invest all you have in this if you feel you have love there!!
@naughtysan3606
@naughtysan3606 Год назад
I can’t wait for future generations to discover these videos.
@shirleysmith8565
@shirleysmith8565 Год назад
❤🙏🏼❤️
@Kristijunes
@Kristijunes Год назад
I discontinue liking a man when he kept saying the dog he loves will be sitting on the passenger seat and the woman he chooses will be at the back. Like, I am also a furmom, but I would not want any person to be more less than animals. We were not compatible in that. Kindness is kindness, but robbing a human soul of the respect they deserve is such cruelty.
@RealandOfficialDeanRaza05
@RealandOfficialDeanRaza05 Год назад
Love is a dangerous emotion that gives a different reaction to our behaviour.
@TripleRN__
@TripleRN__ Год назад
I’m only 10 mins in & the points are so good & valid. I love Jay Shetty so wise, humbled & knowledge. I can’t wait to purchase his book.
@lewishowes
@lewishowes Год назад
Thank you!
@Kristijunes
@Kristijunes Год назад
8.3 days of being together to consider a great friend!? wow this is mind blowing. Haven't known this, but looking back to my friends I spent almost a year of being present before I consider to be in my inner circle.
@lospinos52
@lospinos52 11 месяцев назад
I come a cross this video truly speaking I don’t know how it happens but I clap hands at the end. This is the best interviewer and interviewee I have ever heard.
@lewishowes
@lewishowes 11 месяцев назад
So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.
@lewishowes
@lewishowes 11 месяцев назад
So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.
@alenatiyamiyu6249
@alenatiyamiyu6249 Год назад
I just love these 2 together❤ jays answer to lewis' last question touched me deeply . I had to Pause. I cried and my body felt so Hot. I had so many emotions. I love the chemistry they have❤❤❤❤
@debradorsey153
@debradorsey153 Год назад
A
@debradorsey153
@debradorsey153 Год назад
I like that self care first so that you can take care of your family 🙏
@sanjaypaul9159
@sanjaypaul9159 Год назад
Power duo here! Great interview and deep insights! I love Jay and Lewis!
@helenabocquet
@helenabocquet Год назад
It depends on which way the person is being honest. Its important to clarify that someone can be honest but show no remorse for their actions, but then expect you to be ok with what they are saying just for the fact they are being honest about something they did. Being honest is not enough. If you are going to be honest and say something hurtful, you also need to be prepared to deal with the consequences of the affects of your honesty.
@crosscountrymtb3351
@crosscountrymtb3351 8 месяцев назад
"Should we admire people who are wealthy?" I would then ask "should we look down on people who are poor".... and whatever you answer to the second question is also your answer to the first.
@RealGGstyle
@RealGGstyle 8 месяцев назад
Jay Shetty is a such good listener, I am manifesting to meet and conversation with Jay Shetty🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼 Of course I am manifesting to be invited by Lewis Howes podcast soon 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
@FatimaMarong-be8gj
@FatimaMarong-be8gj 6 месяцев назад
You guys are Amazing
@lewishowes
@lewishowes 6 месяцев назад
So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.
@sayusayme7729
@sayusayme7729 Год назад
Loved this, valuable 🦉 I love myself and this is watering my garden 🪴 thank you both 💚 Everyone I have crossed paths with had helped me even if I wasn’t aware at the time. Beautiful acknowledgment I’m learning to add as plant food 💚
@swathi5773
@swathi5773 Год назад
Audit on : Complain Compare Criticise Control Relationship with self, partner has with themselves and relationship with your partner
@shalomSVZ
@shalomSVZ Год назад
I purchased ur 2 books because i find your words so true and interesting
@lewishowes
@lewishowes Год назад
Thank you! Appreciate you and your support. 🧡
@thiliniranatunga576
@thiliniranatunga576 Год назад
The two of you have the best interview! I love listening to you two.
@lewishowes
@lewishowes Год назад
So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.
@janetandrews1306
@janetandrews1306 Год назад
So true about toxic love!!!!!!
@tata9293
@tata9293 Год назад
Love it from the 1st sec - can’t believe it has so low number of views. Crafted in words the rule of healthy life story of 2. Thank you!! ❤❤❤
@jeanettepelletier1402
@jeanettepelletier1402 Год назад
Wow 😯 this is so eye opening!! Thank you 🙏 for helping me understand where I went wrong and how I can fix my problems.❤
@lewishowes
@lewishowes Год назад
You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡
@Ladybug-zn9fw
@Ladybug-zn9fw Год назад
This is so Powerful 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
@karinam4115
@karinam4115 Год назад
All people you interview are awesome! Willl love to see Dr John Gray to be interviewed! 🙏👍👍👍❤️
@lewishowes
@lewishowes Год назад
So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.
@lilstkngal
@lilstkngal Год назад
15:00, 16:15 master the skill to remember the 3 relationship you are in.19:00
@rosiezazzara7503
@rosiezazzara7503 Год назад
That was a really great interview I loved it !
@lewishowes
@lewishowes Год назад
So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.
@MyChampionHeart
@MyChampionHeart Год назад
Kindly, would it be possible for the team to add links of the person that is interviewed and give credit? Would be great to have links to Jay podcast and book. I say it respectfully with curiosity. Although I will look Jay up. Thank you so much Lewis and team. ❤
@RealandOfficialDeanRaza05
@RealandOfficialDeanRaza05 Год назад
Love becomes toxic if you don't have control and reflection.
@MonicaSancio
@MonicaSancio Год назад
Excellent interview, thank you for your great insights! 🤩
@lewishowes
@lewishowes Год назад
You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡
@bradysilverwood1827
@bradysilverwood1827 Год назад
This book came at such a crucial point in my life! Thank you Lewis and Jay!
@lewishowes
@lewishowes Год назад
You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡
@RosseSanz
@RosseSanz Год назад
Excellent conversation between very knowledgeable persons. Love it ❤!!!
@buddhaneosiddhananda8499
@buddhaneosiddhananda8499 Год назад
"Love is the fixed intention to do what's best for the greater good..." Djwhal Khul
@FlatStella1
@FlatStella1 Год назад
Oh that is so true!!Years I can't trust and get over fake feeling.Been used.
@souledout3239
@souledout3239 Год назад
Engaging, informative and great flow. Thank you.
@lewishowes
@lewishowes Год назад
You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡
@heltristan
@heltristan Год назад
YES ... self care in order to serve ❤ our son x
@lewishowes
@lewishowes Год назад
🧡
@mariayasinovskaya6697
@mariayasinovskaya6697 Год назад
I love these two beautiful human beings! Will never be tired of listening to you! Continue to spread this energy and wisdom ❤
@harman.singh24
@harman.singh24 Год назад
Wow what a bomb of an interview and intellectual combination of Jay and Lewis!!
@lewishowes
@lewishowes Год назад
Appreciate you and your support🧡
@magdalenamm216
@magdalenamm216 Год назад
No masks, inspiring and building something together- wanting to date yourself- putting effort in yourself so u can show up better in relationship
@lilianwarman4447
@lilianwarman4447 Год назад
Love it! Take away-3 in a relationship! So truth!!!❤🙏🕉️
@heltristan
@heltristan Год назад
LOVE is EVERYTHING ❤
@lewishowes
@lewishowes Год назад
🧡
@JVLIFECOACH
@JVLIFECOACH Год назад
"toxic love is where people use a relationship to serve their own needs"?????. As an expert for needs, I can only say: I would love if people really did so... That sentence unfortunately doesn´t make sense, if you really understand needs. love is a need. so you use your relationship to serve" love", "love" for others and "love" for yourself ? That would be lovely, wouldn´t it be? trust is a need. so you use a relationship to serve your need "trust", "trust " in yourself, "trust" in other people, "trust" in humanity? amazing! healing is a need. so you use a relationship to serve your need "healing"? Absolutely fantastic! You would do a huge favour to your partner indeed! that would be an amazing process. serving your needs it´s the healthiest thing you can do. But it is a process of beautiful awareness. Dear Jay Shetty, please do your homework on needs.
@iiorigins
@iiorigins Год назад
My two favorite podcasters. This is magical, thank you!
@lewishowes
@lewishowes Год назад
Appreciate you and your support🧡
@Audreamia
@Audreamia Год назад
Amazing conversation!!
@MyBluebonnet
@MyBluebonnet Год назад
@26:00 I feel like a lot of men share those sentiments when they are in their building phase. The difference is that you SEASONED YOUR WORDS and you added in dept explanation that made it ''digestible'' lol It would be VERY HARD not to RESPECT you on that honesty.
@aaroncarvajal3386
@aaroncarvajal3386 6 месяцев назад
Agree Hanna!
@kbfam3825
@kbfam3825 Год назад
GREAT content. Thank you for sharing.
@lewishowes
@lewishowes Год назад
You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡
@frances4773
@frances4773 Год назад
Q&A clearly helped to understand, conscious, love versus toxic! I am fully engaged in a conversation, and so grateful to you man for being so AUTHENTIC! I had it all wrong. I was backwards with my three!
@sherryj738
@sherryj738 Год назад
I love watching you two together
@lewishowes
@lewishowes Год назад
Thanks for being here!
@bellbirakaur1277
@bellbirakaur1277 Год назад
Thank you for infinite health infinite wealth an infinite protection for Bella an family an humanity amen 🙏🏼
@erikadiar
@erikadiar 10 месяцев назад
10:11 I’m currently in this situation but with maintaining friendships. I’m in school and a mom of two and currently in a moving process.
@elfridadewi8658
@elfridadewi8658 Год назад
In every relationship there are 3 relationships: - the one you have with yourselves - the one your partner with themselves - the one you have with your partner
@shirleysmith8565
@shirleysmith8565 Год назад
❤🙏🏼❤️
@rozaliaslaboiu7810
@rozaliaslaboiu7810 Год назад
You are both just GREAT!!!! 😀👏👏👏
@ligerllama
@ligerllama Год назад
Get your popcorn ready. This one is a great conversation. 🍿👍
@annakunwar3053
@annakunwar3053 Год назад
GG😅
@pr1ncessyapper
@pr1ncessyapper Год назад
Thank you.
@lewishowes
@lewishowes Год назад
You're welcome,thank you for watching🧡
@AngelaSmith-di2uw
@AngelaSmith-di2uw Год назад
I Love You Guys Jay
@monazaiter
@monazaiter Год назад
Amazing!!! Expressed in a way that deep penetrates our understanding of relationships. Thank you both!
@mitchellknight1852
@mitchellknight1852 Год назад
I love this, purely amazing 🤩 Thank You So Much!
@makeoneonly
@makeoneonly Год назад
I love you two! Thank you!
@AngelaSmith-di2uw
@AngelaSmith-di2uw Год назад
U-2 R Amazing Trained Minds Through The Holy Spirit. Truly Blessed🙌
@AngelaSmith-di2uw
@AngelaSmith-di2uw Год назад
Amen🙏
@AngelaSmith-di2uw
@AngelaSmith-di2uw Год назад
Amen🙏
@AngelaSmith-di2uw
@AngelaSmith-di2uw Год назад
AMEN🙏
@vivianherrera6003
@vivianherrera6003 Год назад
Brilliantly said 🙏🎯🦋😘
@lookup912
@lookup912 Год назад
This is inspiring and crucial....I'm here for it. When is the follow up event in Hawaii ❤️‍🔥 ie;;; singles healing retreat/ personality tests/ speed dating--matchmaking session👍
@levchefshow
@levchefshow Год назад
*Nice conversation*
@buddhaneosiddhananda8499
@buddhaneosiddhananda8499 Год назад
We can not choose to pick up our love and put it down wherever we choose... we do not choose who we love...
@carolin9876
@carolin9876 Год назад
We can't choose who we love, but we can choose who we date or commit to.
@clydealmeida
@clydealmeida Год назад
I love this. Brought so much clarity in an area in my life that I'm struggling with. Thank u so much
@gennancarabajal1827
@gennancarabajal1827 Год назад
Comparison is the thief of joy!
@craigosterberg5045
@craigosterberg5045 Год назад
Thanks for sharing
@cathyg8313
@cathyg8313 Год назад
2 of the best humans I've listened to & learned from in my life. Always such great information!! Keep inspiring! 🙏❤
@lewishowes
@lewishowes Год назад
Thanks for being here!
@sheysimplengpinayu.k.1824
@sheysimplengpinayu.k.1824 Год назад
It’s true love sometimes becoming toxic in the end ..😢
@Charlenespov
@Charlenespov Год назад
Wow very informative thank you ! Changed my whole perspective on communication
@lewishowes
@lewishowes Год назад
So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.
@janel1977blessed
@janel1977blessed Год назад
Soo good… wow Thank you Guys 🙏
@AdiOrPazCoach
@AdiOrPazCoach Год назад
You guys are amazing
@lewishowes
@lewishowes Год назад
🧡
@FlatStella1
@FlatStella1 Год назад
thank you!!!
@lewishowes
@lewishowes Год назад
You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡
@bobbijokramm1976
@bobbijokramm1976 Год назад
Thank u for this necessary knowledge 💯💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎
@lewishowes
@lewishowes Год назад
You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡
@arjun6818
@arjun6818 Год назад
41:00 to 42:11
@duduzileratsuma2807
@duduzileratsuma2807 Год назад
(Compare,criticize,control,complain)
@patriciag.hutchinson4147
@patriciag.hutchinson4147 Год назад
You can’t give anything to the relationship that you don’t have.
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