the WORST landlord 💸 r/AITA 

I've always thought that Reddit's idea of a step-parent/step-child relationship is a bit weird, isolating for the child even; but in this case I do agree, it's her mom's money, to give to the grandchild she recognized and had contact with. If that had been left in the testament, no one would be complaining.

Landlord one is making my blood boil. So the tenants get to pay less rent, and someone gets to live the storage room, but the landlord gets more money overall. For what? Typically if you pay more for something it's because it's of higher value. Landlord is lining their pockets, not doing anything to increase the value, and acting like they are doing all the tenants a favor, and probably convinced the new tenant to take the offer by saying they would get a bigger room. Landlord gets all the AH points, tenants get minor AH points for playing along.

I am disabled and need a bungalow. If I was looking for a room, I wouldn't force the existing tenants to accommodate me. I'd feel super uneasy about that. I'd discuss my needs and if it wasn't possible with everyone being ok with it, I'd look elsewhere. This is completely different to if the person became disabled while living there and needed to switch but they refused to. Now that would be a huge AH move

It's actually very traditional for an Italian ragu sauce or bolognese style sauce to use a mixture of beef and pork mince because beef is a lean meat so the pork adds fat and sweetier taste to the sauce. HOWEVER if I was hosting a dinner party and had invited my dear friends who are Muslim and Sikh and I am not religious at all, then I would just cook something with chicken, fish or even vegetarian/vegan that we can all have rather than having my friends bring something over. I think that is pretty assholey on the host's part.

The room thing might actually be illegal. I know for where I live a room has to have a window a door and a closet to be considered a bedroom. Otherwise it's storage, closet or like a den maybe? Office space? Eh, not a bedroom anyway. And most places have laws about occupancy of a building so yeah... illegal shady landlording happening here.

The first one speaks to me, as generally my family was pretty bad about my disliking pork, but once my husband developed a sudden food sensitivity to pork products, they're very good about it. Oddly, his family constantly forgets, and are very critical of him for it.

Does the husband expect his ex to leave the son something? No. It’s not reasonable to expect an inheritance from an unrelated person (grandmother to stepmother.) When my stepdad’s parents died I didn’t expect anything despite calling her “grandma” for 20 years!

NOTE: A ROOM WITHOUT A SECONDARY EXIT IS NOT A LEGAL BEDROOM. About rooms potentially being a bedroom or not, the room needs to have egress. This means there needs to be a window to get out of the room if your exit is obstructed by fire or another emergency.

Step-parent relationships are hard but it boils down to "are you a parent?". She said "no" and that follows. If she was an active parent, then I would say yes. But she's not. She's more like an aunt because she has a relationship with the dad, not them - much as a sibling would. And I would not expect my aunt to leave property to me when her son is alive.

Speaking as a step child myself, from both sides of the rope, I wouldn’t expect either my step dad or my step mom to include me in an inheritance from their parents unless I was explicitly mentioned. In fact, it didn’t even cross my mind when my stepmother’s mom passed away this past spring, or when my step dad’s mother passed away a few years ago. I was thrown into their lives at the age of 16, and while I love and care for them as I do my own grandmother, I know that relationship will never have the same closeness as they do with my little siblings. And that’s okay. So perhaps the husband in this situation needs to take a step back and see the bigger picture with this one.

For the last story: clearly NTA. Like you said, the money was given to her and she's decided to give it to their son. + she clearly explained that the 2 stepkids and their family are not that close to her (not in a family way). I understand why the father would like to give money to HIS 3 kids (like you said, he's the father of them 3) but this is not about him and when/if he receives inheritance from a family member he'll do whatever he'll want with it. Point being: Her grandmother gave her the money telling her to do what she wanted with it. That's what she did. Now if the son wants to then split it and give some of the money to his siblings, that's also a possible choice. But he has the right to keep it all for himself too.

Always enjoy these! I'm going to disagree on the first one just because I don't think OP and their housemates should be considered AH's for trying to get lower rent since they are young and trying to survive under capitalism. The roommates are AH's however for expecting the OP to switch rooms when they don't seem willing to. The landlord is, as you said, the biggest AH here.

For the last one, if the step-kids had contact with the Grandmother and saw her as their grandmother too, I would say AH. But she wasn't. So NTA.

The landlord should’ve said “whoever is in the storage room pays (very discounted amount) and I have a potential 5th roommate, but the 2nd floor and/or storage room is a dealbreaker. Do you all want to shuffle or should I tell this person that room isn’t available” those dealbreakers are enough info without knowing they’re disabled.

It totally makes sense that the redditor wants to give all or most of her money to her bio son who she has a 100% parent-child relationship with rather than split it between children who doesn´t have that connection. If the dynamic is significantly different it makes sense that the grandma money gets divided differently. If it had been the stepmother who died then I would have been more for it being divided equally since there was more contact there than with grandma, but as the redditor said: They didn´t have that connection with grandma.

Different countries, same customs. The landlord story reminds me so much of the student housing conditions in Italy, especially those in the bigger towns. I can only emphasize that the greed of the apartment owners is immense. Sadly.

The first one: I have a Jewish friend, and even though he doesn't only eat Kosher foods I always make sure something at our hosted parties is Kosher. I noticed that he did prefer those foods, so that's what we do. A friend of mine went vegetarian for 4 years. Guess what? Vegetarian options at my parties. I'm not special, this is common courtesy for hosting. The moment that friend received a text about the OP providing their own halal food, that was the moment for the friend to say absolutely do not worry I've got it.

Re. the inheritance, if I were the father /husband I would not expect the stepchildren to get any inheritance. It is not those children’s grandma and the poster doesn’t have a children-parent relationship with the stepchildren. It sounds like the poster is not really being treated equally like family, but rather only as the father’s partner, but now that it comes to money all of a sudden they should get family inheritance? I don’t even know if the stepchildren are expecting to inherit, but it sure sounds like the father is somehow trying to get something extra for his other kids although the whole time he also accepted the situation of there being friendly distance between his children from a previous marriage and his current partner.

The inheritance OP is NTA. If the stepkids had been close to the grandma, it would be one thing, but they did not choose a relationship with her. I have farying relationships with my half brother's family members on their mom's side. Even their mom, who i am closest to I would never expect anything. I especially didn't feel entitled to their grandparent's things. I doubt they did for mine either. Money just brings out the greed.

About the renting situation. It wasn't said that the room is actually a storage room, but it was USED as one. It can totally be a small bedroom etc. But apparently all the other rooms were bigger, so they rather used them instead. So if that was the case, it can surely be rented out as well. As long as the land lord is honest about the room, and not even suggesting the possible tenant that they could get something else. If the person looking for a room is willing to settle for a smaller room, then there shouldn't be a problem. But if the room is actual storage room, then it is just greedy business to try to rent it out to some desperate young.

With the inheritance I would have voted a little differently if the step-children didn't have an extensive family, and their biological mom wasn't in the picture both financially and physically. Like if OP and her husband were the only parents/parental figures all three children have, then I would see it as a little bit unfair. Regardless it's OP's inheritance and as long as she keeps this same mentality if the step-children's mom were to do the same she's NTA.

I will say that I the second story is a little weird for me because I have lived in and had friends live in spaces that should not be rented (ie. Unfinished basements/storage rooms) But that being said they never paid to live in those spaces and it was only in situations when it was living I that space or being homeless and I would much rather my friends live in my crappy basement then on the streets and I would much rather live in my mom's partly unfinished basement (no flooring but the walls are done) with the mice then live on the street. Edit: I would like to clarify that in the cases of my friend living in spaces that were technically not rooms they did not pay to live in that space and it was only for a few months so they could find a proper rental.

Re: the last one. Yes, she should do what she wants with it. Those are my thoughts. When my grandmother passed away, I gave my 2 kids and my step daughter each an equal bit of my inheritance. However this was because A) my choice and B) her and my grandmother were very close and my grandmother considered my step daughter to be her first great grand daughter and never treated her differently from the ones that followed. A totally different situation from the OP's.

I'm a pescetarian and whenever we go to someone's house, We speak to the host(s) and agree to bring my own food or eat beforehand. If my special food was what everyone else picked over the host's, that isn't my fault. I don't ever expect others to accommodate my dietary choices and if they do, it's wonderful. However, that shouldn't make me the bad guy in this scenario because I only brought food BECAUSE you wouldn't accommodate me. If you wanted everyone to be happy, you could have had a pot luck, asked the guests what they would have preferred, or catered in. You can't blame someone because their food was better than yours. Do better, folks.

I feel like the disabled tenant is also being an AH. Yeah, the landlord is obviously the worst in the scenario but they went to see the room and then decided to sign for it, knowing it doesn't meet their accommodations? they also did this (I assume but I know assumptions aren't the way to do this) knowing that the other rooms were occupied. Its reasonable to assume that they were only shown the 'room' being offered so it's really weird, to me, that they've asked for a bigger room when they likely know that other people already live there. It's understandable if there's a room shortage and the landlord is exploiting that by offering a non-room but I'm so confused why the extra tenant would agree to live somewhere that they know would not suit them, resulting in other people having to move around to accommodate them? I feel like more information is needed.

I would love a weekly 1h podcast version of this in Spotify haha

Referring to the last one, I have a very similar relationship w/ my mum's partner and I would never ever expect any inheritance from his family. I'm honored when I get offered his dad's old shirts! Of course every family is different, but it's weird to me that the husband thinks she's the AH

In the inheritance story, I think an important parameter is the relationship between the husband and wife and how they treat their individual/family money. Many couples have joint assets, joint bank accounts, without a "mine - yours" distinction. If this has been the case with this couple so far it might explain why the husband expects that this, being "our" (family) money, can be split equally among his 3 kids. He basically hadn't considered his wife's financial autonomy, either because of assumptions based on how they've done things so far or because he is not considerate enough of her apparent need to have some money which is hers alone. It is probably the first time they've inherited anything, so it's a new conversation for this family that needs sorting out. Now if I was her, I might have set aside like 10% of the total earnings after the house is sold and gift that to the other two kids, split evenly.I would hope it's clear to them that it's not money they were entitled to, but seeing as we're family and I care about them I'd like them to have this as a gift (a thoughtful gesture)

That housing crisis one annoyed me because especially in major cities, we keep hearing about the “housing crisis,” but the problem has never been a lack of housing. It is a lack of affordable housing when wealthy [Bad] landlords raise their rent to price out marginalized community members and “gentrify” the area by catering to wealthy [usually white or at least highly privileged] tenants. There is adequate housing, but the only things left available are instead ones like this that do not have the proper space, or are in other ways run down or substandard for living in.

12:30 the idea of fairness that i adhere to is fairness of outcome, not fairness of income. Fairness in this case is when all three children end up with a college fund. If the other two kids are likely to inherit enough from their mom's side, but your son won't, then the money is best saved for him. If they won't get a reasonable inheritance, then sharing it might be fairer. Neither of the kids deserves less than another. But that doesn't mean dividing it equally by three is the fair solution!

The first one made me think of this. So in my friend group, on of my friend can’t eat gluten, and on holidays, my mom likes to make treats for me, my sister, and ours friends. And my mom always make a smaller batch gluten-free for her. Tomorrow on Valentine’s Day, me and my sister are going to bring goodie bags for them, and there’s one that’s gluten-free

I've said it once and I'll say it again: I love your perspective and reasoning, Shaaba ❤️

The disabled room story actually just makes me wonder... why would they even put a disabled tenant in a two-level place? Personally I would feel pretty uneasy about not being able to access half my living area but that's just me. Then that made me think about bathrooms. Is there a downstairs bathroom? And how wheelchair-accessible is that downstairs bathroom also? Honestly, I think switching rooms should be the LEAST of everyone's concerns for the minute.

Family and money is always complicated.

As the trusted adult but not parent of my partners child, I completely agree with the last NTA. I would never expect (and know for a fact ) that my child would not be included in his half brothers family/inheritance and I would not be including his brother in mine. Obviously we as the adults take care of their daily growing needs together financially and they will never be hurting for support. But neither of them has a relationship with their half siblings family and it would be weird to expect it. When my partner's parents go I'm sure that will be split evenly between all the grandkids but again that's their blood family.. I was pleasantly surprised that the overwhelming majority agreed that this is not the asshole move.

Hi Shabaa ! Could you do an episode on friendship break up ? Love your work, have a lovely, shiny, tender day love~

For the second case, absolutely everyone is the ah. The person who is supposedly moving in went to see the room that was available (the storage room) and decided to rent it. Why request for a different room after already having decided to live there?

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Your eyeliner is fantastic today!

For the stepmum inheritance: her stepkids already have two parents to look after their financial needs, they are not entitled to a third one. OP's biological son will split dad's money with his half siblings and get nothing from their mum. I don't see why his mum shouldn't look after just him. The dad is projecting his responsibilities onto his new partner. He needs to change his perspective.

No one is entitled to an inheritance. Whoever gets it can make choices about how to use it. If family is family, they should be happy for each other.

Rotis are WONDERFUL! Especially all-beef roti, love it on the rare occasions I get it!

For the roommate, simply say "No. My room is not available for rent, only the storage room is available." For the inheritance, it doesn't need to be an all or nothing solution. What if they use a nice chunk of the money to go on a family vacation with all the kids included, and then the rest goes into trust for the son? What if she leaves the majority of it to the son, but a proportion to the step kids? Anyway, I appreciate that stepmom and dad are talking it out between them and coming up with a solution.

Since those kids didn't have a relationship with that grandma, I don't see why anyone would think that they should get inheritance from her. They didn't bother to visit her, to send her cards, to be nice to her, to bond with her, but now that she has passed away they want her money? Sheesh, I could never. They're pretty much complete strangers to that grandma, in my opinion they're upset because they don't get inheritance from a complete stranger. Family bonds mean nothing if you don't ever do anything for each other.

Leaving the comment to boost an underrated creator

I haven’t seen your videos in awhile but lately I’ve been in a very dark depressive state and I’ve been watching so many of your videos and I must say you’re incredibly comforting and you’ve been helping me a lot I wish you were my mum haha tysm

as a person who would need the bigger bedroom on the ground floor due to physical disability, absolutely do NOT give up your room for the new potential tenant! it sucks to have more limited options, but that is NOT on you! absolutely NTA!

On the inheritance story, my view is that fair isn't necessarily equal. This might just be because, on Reddit, I've seen a ton of stories where a parent tries to force their kids to have equal conditions and just end up needlessly screwing over one kid just so the other doesn't feel jealous. "I won't let you go to Oxford because your stepbrother couldn't get into college", "I told your Mom not to buy you expensive gifts anymore because I can't buy them for your stepbrother", "I'm making you share your late mother's jewelry with your stepsister", etc. No, sometimes fair means one kid gets more, and that's okay. If I had two kids, and only one had diabetes, only that kid would get insulin. I wouldn't say "Either you both get insulin or neither of you do!" because that would make me a bad parent.

On the last one; if the step kids had a close relationship with granny then they should get equal shares of the money. However, it looks like they didn't care to make any effort to spend quality time with granny so they shouldn't get any money. Especially if they aren't related by blood. This hinges on the relationship with granny, not the relationship with the parents.

People that need to reduce their cost of living in order to make ends meet are absolutely NTA. All the blame here goes to the landlord

12:00 as a step-kid (no longer the kid part) myself. I do not expect anything from my stepmoms family as inheritance.

“Just remember to be kind. We don’t want to be fishing for you too!” 🤣

8:21 i am disabled and the whole situation with this sounds like a horrible rooming situation i wouldn’t want to be getting into, with or without my disability

As someone with a disability, I agree with ESH verdict, and actually, the verdict on Reddit being NTA kinda saddens me because it shows how little people think about the needs of disabled people. Yes, the biggest asshole is the landlord for putting everyone in this position because nobody deserves to live in a closet. However, depending on the disability, space is often an absolute necessity (for example, my wheelchair's fairly big, and I have an oxygen machine and other medical equipment I use at night), while it's a privilege for most nondisabled people, and you have no freaking idea how difficult it is to find accessible housing. I had a somewhat similar experience with my current condo; my unit is pretty accessible, but the parking garage is tiny and ill-designed, so the space I was assigned didn't work for me (it wasn't the 1 handicap space for some reason, and my van has a ramp that comes out of the side for my wheelchair). The nondisabled person who had the handicap spot refused to switch and even stated "I bet she's not really disabled". Thankfully, someone with a larger space was willing to switch. Now, I don't think the OP is as bad as the person in my story because they're not dismissing the disability, and switching rooms is a bigger sacrifice than switching parking spaces. I agree with you that 1. they shouldn't have agreed to rent out the room in the first place if none of them would be willing to live there themselves and 2. they should ask more about the disabled person's needs and not just assume that stairs are an issue.

No, the step kids don't treat her like a mom. They are not blended; she is just a trusted adult friend to them. If I had an inheritance and I was remarried, that money would only be set back for my kids and not the step kids! Not only that, but before that the money would be put back into a trust only for me that would eventually pass on to my kids. My new husband wouldn't get a dime of it. That would be my money and only my money. Financial advisors will actually sit down with couples and set it up, so the spouse is kept separate. I am divorced and my ex would is a total con artist and would have tried to steal that money from me in a heartbeat. So, what happens if dad and mom get divorced? Dad needs to have no access to that money and mom needs to make sure it is put back in only her name with a solid will to go to the son or she can help him buy a house with it. She shouldn't even distribute it yet. That husband will try to swindle her out of it in a heartbeat in a divorce court, just look at him trying to get it for his kids from another wife!

For the rental one, I think we need more information. First of all, how big is the "storage room" is it an actual cupboard or just a small but perfectly functional room that happened to be used for storage? Secondly, presumably the new tenant viewed the storage room to be able to say it was unsuitable, so they CAN get up the stairs and if they couldn't wouldn't they be solely viewing ground floor rooms. Thirdly, the bathroom is typically upstairs in these types of properties, so it sounds like only the dimensions of the room were an issue. Even so, why would they sign a contract for an unsuitable room? I think we need more details about their side of the story. Also, unless the rooms are practically identical, it's odd that all the tenants are paying the same price and their specific rooms are usually written into these types of contracts (as opposed to renting the whole house between them). Finally, the existing tenants and new tenant should be allowed to meet before anyone agrees anything (they'll have to live together after all). Overall, the landlord is definitely at fault and possibly not doing things by the book. They've clearly made a difficult situation for all the tenants, but I think we don't have enough information to fully decide about everyone else in this story.

With the new roommate, it seems like the landlord rented the room out, giving the assumption to the new renter that they would get an acceptable room and not the small one. So that is def on the landlord, who advertised something, that does not exist.

My ass of an uncle went on a 2 year vendetta over inheritence. No one got on with him. My granddads sister passed away and he inherited a good sum and initially said he would give his 3 kids XXX, then when he got the money and found he was a couple of grand short he decided to give his kids XX (they were understanding and happy), well my uncle wasn't happy. He never said anything to his dad but we got the brunt end of it till the point after my granddad died a yr later he demanded the extra money on top of the share of the sale of the house (which all 3 kids were in charge of but all 3 had to sign the final form but he held back for 6 months until his sibs agreed to the extra money). My other uncle gave him the extra money out of his share just to get him off his back.

1:54 Idk, here good meatballs have pork and even veal, so I imagine lasagna is similar

The way you speak is just so gentle and healing I love your content Shaaba

Shaaba! Your nails are absolutely darling and not only is that shade of brown one of my absolute favorite colors but I think it looks absolutely smashing on you and coordinates with your pink hair just perfectly!

The inheritance thing is a tricky one. I love what you said about not complaining, the person giving the inheritance is the one who decides. I've seen a situation from the other side, where the parents of an adult person who lost his SO want to leave him an equal(?) share but only if he leaves that money to his siblings, not his stepchildren (the SO's biological children). He told his parents that they can not decide on who he leaves the money to after they are gone and he does plan to leave everything to his stepchildren, because he considers them his children. If you reverse his parents logic of keeping things in the family, the stepchildren could claim their mothers inheritance and force him out of the house they owned together, which they would never do.

2: Not op fault, he only accepts a new tenant because of the other roomates. Op said they were fine with continue paying like that

The son in the third story won't be getting any inheritance from the maternal family of the step-kids, so why should they get a slice of the inheritance from the OP's grandmother? If my paternal cousins' maternal grandmother died, I wouldn't expect something because that isn't the grandparent I am related to, even if I had a really great relationship with that person. I didn't even receive anything from any of my grandparents when they died.

great insight, I always appreciate your perspective!!

The idea of an inheritance is so weird to me especially when people just expect one (not in relation to the story but just in general)

for the first one: i have many severe food allergies and i hate making people cater for me, especially since my anxiety is so bad that i probably wouldn't eat it anyways. bringing your own food is most often the better answer if you have food restrictions, the friend seems insecure about her cooking in my opinion. NTA

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I'm confused about the new tenant, they came in and saw the tiny room and they decided rather than look for another place, they're gonna ask someone else to give up their room? I mean it's fine to ask I suppose but only if they intend to pay more as well. Landlord is still the biggest asshole tho.

OI. Yes it's a bigger room but it is MUCH MORE noisy. The others wanted to go upstairs. They've been there for a year already and everybody was fine with the arrangement. Size is not the only metric, they shouldn't move an inch for a stranger, don't care if disabled. They go from seeking a rental to seeking a rental. It's like telling the neighbor of a rental that I don't like it so they should let me in their house and they move into the rental, for the same price. You rent that room, bigger, noisier but you're renting it with a contract. You shouldn't give an inch

for the inheritance one... bio son gets any inheritance from mom's family. Step kids get any inheritance from their mom's family. And all 3 kids split any inheritance from dad's family. Seems fair to me

When my mom passes someday, my stepbrothers will not inherit anything because all of the money my mom and stepdad have came from my dad and my grandparents (none of whom had a relationship with my stepbrothers). My stepdad fully supports this arrangement.

I mean, people went to see the room, if they like it they accept if it's too small for them they do not. Why should you change your room?! NTA in my opinion, they're seeing the room, if it's too small they should keep looking to find another accommodation! ...It's difficult to find accommodation and they're afraid this person will walk away?! doesn't that mean there are a lot of other people looking if it's hard to find a space?! roommates are YTA!!!

The last one, I think I agree with the husband partially, but ultimately she can do what she wants with the inheritance. I think a good compromise would be to give son most money bc he had most relationship with grandma, NOT because he's the full bio kid. But give partial of the money to the other kids because OP married a father of other children, and so she is partially responsible for their well being even if Grandma wasnt close to them, even if it's not a mother-kid relationship.

Big assumption that it's not a viable room. It might be, or might not. It might be just a tiny bedroom.

love these videos! highlight of my week :)

While I don't think it's particularly nice of the landlord to rent out a storage room as a bedroom, I think the responsibility here lies on politicians/law makers. If the rooms are being rented individually (they each have a contract and pay their own rent) then there should be laws surrounding the minimum size/conditions of a bedroom. I especially don't think the tenants are assholes for wanting reduced rent, and giving an additional person a place to live. Affordable living is extremely scarce where I live, and the stress of not having a place to live is unbearable. The rent should definitely be proportionate to the room sizes tho. Would be very assholey to ask someone to pay the same for a tiny scrub bedroom.

Shaba. I appreciate you.

I think inheritance is complicated, but I'm of the general view all kids should be included, even if it's very split unevenly.

5:32 I mean….how is this on OP? This is all on the landlord

love your hair!

Leaving a comment for the algorithm

My student rooms in manchester were all equally split regardless of room size

Great video as always.

I definitely don’t think the step mom is an asshole, but I could see from the step kids perspectives’ this could feel like their step mom cares less about them? Even if they weren’t that close with that particular family member, they could’ve felt more connection to their step mom if she had shared it equally.

For the landlord one... yes I think the landlord is a major A-hole for renting out a room that is a cupboard. However... if the new tenant has actually taken a look at the room, signed for THAT room while AWARE of its size, location, etc. , I honestly think it's also majorly asshole-y of THEM to then ask the older tenants to switch rooms. Even if they're disabled. If you don't want the room you signed for, you should not have signed for it in the first place.

lolol literally eating Curry and Roti rn, its true! So yummy!

...that first one got me craving curry for breakfast though

An offering for the almighty enigmatic algorithm

I don't want to sound mean or pushy, but has your wedding video arrived😅 Love your Videos ❤

the room one- op themselves says they don't want to move into the little room bc they know it's crap, so already considering renting it out to someone else and specifically a physically disabled person who, as stated before, can't live in such a tiny space (for reasons we don't know bc they dont specify anything, but there are many reasons why a disabled person would need a bigger room) is kind of an assholy move. however i dont blame op at all for not wanting to give up their room bc the situation is messy and the real asshole is the landord who is putting pressure on their tenants

Step kids are not kids. Under the law, they would not inherit unless they have been adopted by the step parent. So they have absolutely zero rights to inherit in this situation and should not be demanding a share of that inheritance which is not theirs to begin with. That sounds like entitlement.

Blended families are nonsense. I was a child in a “blended” family and it was terrible. If you have kids (unless one partner is abusive or something) get couples therapy, not a divorce.

I really don't get people who get mad about someone brining food. I tried to go gluten free to see if I gave celiac disease so I brought a gluten free cake to a dinner where the dessert was cookies. Everyone was happy about having a cake and cookies to enjoy

2:54 I think OP is a little bit the asshole. I also have dietary restrictions (mostly non-medical with a handful of moderate allergies) and when someone is making something I can't eat, I bring food for me, and just me. If someone is going to the trouble of cooking, it's rude to bring food for everyone else unless specifically asked, or at least I have always been told as much. It could possibly be a cultural thing though. I do think the friend is more the asshole for cooking pork when people she presumably knew were Muslim were coming.

I think inheritance is complicated, but I'm of the general view all kids should be included, even if it's very split unevenly. And I think family members have the right to call out inheritance that they think is unfair, my mum had to do it to her parents when they asked her about them changing the will to give one of my second cousins nothing despite their sibling getting stuff, and give most of what they had previously set aside for me and my sibling to my cousin who they'd already helped buy a house for among other things.

It sounds like despite the good mix of meats, the first story's host's lasagna just didn't taste very good. My family makes a bangin' lasagna with just turkey meat. We use a lot of awesome spices and sauce so it always tastes really good. Our recipe could've solved both of the hosts problems: cooking something halal and making food people would actually enjoy eating. 🤣

I REALLY don't like the upstairs roommates immediately jumping to "a physically disabled roommate wouldn't be able to live upstairs". Hey: stop making decisions for/about disabled people without asking them! Literally "physically disabled" is a huge category that may or may not mean the person can handle stairs! And if most rooms in this apartment are upstairs...I feel like they probably knew that. Being unable to live in a storage cupboard upstairs is like. Different from being unable to live in an actual bedroom upstairs.... But also yeah this landlord sucks and honestly these kids should know better than to agree to something this scummy.

First one: A little butt-holey to send a screenshot of the text, I would have just told them basically what they said. I dunno if I would say it's THAT buttholey though, it's kind of like what they're doing here, asking if they did wrong and giving some context as to why they would think that. But yeah, not the asshole at all. OP asked if they could bring their own food, since they could not eat the meal because of their religion. The friend who hosted the party is just upset and envious because their food didn't get eaten. Second one: I'm not gonna be too mean to the OP over them renting out the storage room, because, as he says, broke students. They don't really have too much power over it and likely need every cent/penny they can get. And yeah, I'm gonna say not the asshole. The new tenant should have known what the size of the room was, and if it would meet their needs, so I think that's on the landlord, maybe a little on the new tenant. I think that's basically just it, the landlord is the asshole here. If they were going to stick a new tenant in there, they should have been fully informed on how big the room was going to be so they'd know if it would meet their needs. You can't just then ask someone else to change rooms, people who are already settled there and paying rent and all that jazz. Even knowing that the rent is equally split, regardless of the size of their rooms, doesn't really change anything for me, because I assume it's all something that they've agreed to. And it also means that they'd be paying exactly the same if they moved rooms so... yeah. I think Shaaba did hit on a good point, though. He should offer, instead, since the other tenants have said that they'd switch if they were in that position, to switch with one of them, and they can go in the tiny room. And see what they think of that. But yeah, the landlord is the asshole here. I wouldn't say 'ESH' because the tenants don't really have too much power here, being 'broke students'. But I can see where Shaaba is coming from. Third one: I wouldn't say they're an asshole. Like, the biological kid was close to their grandma, their grandma liked them, the step kids didn't know this grandma that well and the grandma didn't really know them, I would say the grandma would rather it go to someone they know, rather than someone they don't know. It's not like the stepkids are getting cut out of it completely, they're just not getting as much as the one who actually knew the woman. Like, if a relative isn't too close with another relative, who then dies, you wouldn't expect them to get as much as other relatives who were closer to them, y'know? It is kind of asshole-y because it's the Mom splitting up the inheritance rather than the grandma, but she is clearly doing what she thinks grandma would have wanted. Even if grandma said 'do what you want', if they're doing what they think their grandma would have done, based on how well she knows the kids... I'm actually coming around a little. It is a bit asshole-y. Even if they're doing what you think their grandma would have done with it, it's still their choice, and splitting it up between bio kids and step kids does seem kinda asshole-y. Because the money is THEIRS, and you're splitting it up unevenly. OP saying they're doing what grandma would have wanted could be their way of covering up that they have a preference between their bio kid and their stepkids. ...I'd say a tentative 'you're the asshole' but... I dunno. It's a tough one.

It’s wild that the people on the inheritance thread seem to think that’s a universal experience? Neither side of my family was wealthy. Neither my parents nor my sibling and I have ever received any inheritance. When you don’t come from generational wealth, it’s just not a thing. That also led me to think about the stepsons’ mom’s side of the family and if they’d ever be able to help their sons in any way close to how much OP helped her son. It’s not that I necessarily think OP should be obligated to contribute to her stepsons’ futures, but it all just sounded a bit…out of touch? Naïve?