Therapist Reviews Gilmore Girls | Emily and Lorelai | Engagement Fight

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I'm going to analyze the episode where Emily finds out the Lorelai got engaged to Max, but didn't hear it from Lorelai. This leads to them having a huge fight as Emily appears cold and distant to Lorelai when she final reveals she's engaged and Emily sharing that she knew she was the last person Lorelai told.
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As a counsellor who specializes in relationships and breakup recovery, I will be analyzing their relationship dynamics and communication styles with my counselling insight. These videos are for education purposes to identify areas of communication that can be improved and to generally discuss relevant theories within psychology.
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29 сен 2024

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Комментарии : 27

@HeatherThomCounselling 2 года назад

What are your thoughts on Lorelai not telling Emily about her engagement to Max? Share in the comments below!

@malloryweeks3306 2 года назад

Emily is sad because she is the last one to hear about it. I would imagine that she feels hurt that her only daughter wouldn’t share that special moment with her and want to help her plan it or get her input. Emily and Lorelei likes to hold grudges over things in the past. Yes I understand that getting pregnant at sixteen and leaving at seventeen is a big deal and they have a lot of resentment toward each other. Neither one of them ever tries to understand each other. Lorelei still acts like a misunderstood teenager and Emily acts like her behaviour didn’t impact Lorelei at all

@HeatherThomCounselling 2 года назад

Well said! Thanks for commenting 🙂

@bamberton3457 2 года назад

I love the new background 🥰

@HeatherThomCounselling 2 года назад

Thanks, I love it too! 😊

@bragny 2 года назад

Something that also I think plays into Lorelei not telling her mother about the engagement is the fact that it's an engagement to Max, not Chris. Throughout the series Emily brings it up again how she should have married Chris, that the marriage had been set in motion before Lorelei ran away. Emily later then meddles with the existing relationship to Luke, trying to encourage Chris to go for Lorelei. Makes it clear that Luke is to low of a status. While the Luke stuff happens later in the series, I do think it's safe to assume the marrying Chris matter has been brought up plenty of times before. I think given that history it makes sense why Lorelei might have additional hesitation to talk about her engagement to Max.

@HeatherThomCounselling 2 года назад

Omg that's a good point!!

@hibodhi 2 года назад

Emily fostered that relationship, Emily made it hard for Lorelai to share time and time again. It's hard have a parent that doesn't accept the true you and maybe Lorelai wanted this moment of joy without judgement.

@TheHerothief 2 года назад

true, but lorelai is a spolied brat who never misses a chance to let emily know that she doesn't want to spend time with her and everything is a huge imposition, and yet always comes back with her tail between her legs when she needs help. they have little in common, but lorelai makes 0 effort to bridge that gap

@hibodhi 2 года назад

@@TheHerothief But who made her a spoiled brat? Emily raised (more like emotionally neglected) Lorelai. It’s more like “Well isn’t it the consequences of my own actions.” kind of thing. You see Lorelai have that same type of consequence when Rory turns into a terror in later seasons. It’s like a cycle of bad parenting that started with Emily and was continued by Lorelai.

@angelaholmes8888 Год назад

@@TheHerothief I totally understand why lorelai doesn't want to be near Emily because she's always criticizing her and still refuses to accept her daughter for who she is

@RebeccaDziwulski416 2 года назад

I feel like Lorelei did say something sooner is because she wasn’t sold on the engagement. Her holding off was her way of protecting herself because she was having a hard time with the entire thing.

@angelaholmes8888 Год назад

Yeah I feel that too it's obvious that she didn't want to get engaged

@karlaakemann3268 Год назад

I believe the reason behind why Lorelai does not tell her mother about her engagement to Max is that she did not want to be subjected to Emily's constant criticism.

@angelaholmes8888 Год назад

Yeah exactly Emily is always judging lorelai on everything she's such a downer

@sociologie4507 2 года назад

Very nice video, as always. And what a nice poster. I will get myself one! or two!

@HeatherThomCounselling 2 года назад

You should! There's posters from different shows and movies!

@bef9612 2 года назад

I never saw it that way, the whole "bringing up past traumas," thing for Emily. That actually makes a lot of sense.

@HeatherThomCounselling 2 года назад

I'm glad I can provide new insights! 😊

@malloryweeks3306 2 года назад

Except they still bring it up. Even after all the times they talk about it it never gets resolved. I get that your hurt about it but have an actual sit down discussion about it and then move on. I get that there will be resentment about everything that happened but you have to get rid of all that anger

@SamiLo2 Год назад

This whole situation could’ve been easily straightened out if Lorelei just talked to Emily. “Mom, I know you’re upset that my friends knew before you did, but Max proposed at the inn so pretty much everyone knew about it when it happened and I was going to tell you and dad at dinner the other night when Rory brought Dean but then dad was upset about Dean being here and I didn’t feel it was the right time. I’m sorry if you and dad were hurt by the situation.” Instead there was no real explanation of what took place and both were making assumptions about the other.

@karlaakemann3268 2 года назад

I think it was three weeks

@Starbits7 2 года назад

I can understand both sides here, but Lorelai does the same thing to Emily again when she gets engaged to Luke. I couldn't image going through that twice. Talk about making a tense relationship worse...

@SamiLo2 Год назад

Different situations. First time, Lorelei had planned on telling them when Richard got angry about Dean being at dinner and that situation prevented it. Second time with Luke, they weren’t speaking because of what happened with Rory.

@SamiLo2 Год назад

I believe it was only 2 weeks total. when Emily and Richard told Rory they were going to have a special dinner the next week for her. That was the night Lorelei said “yes.” Then the next week was the special dinner where Dean came and Richard lost his temper and Emily found out Lorelei was engaged and then the second full week was when Lorelei told Emily.

@MaricaAmbrosius 4 месяца назад

I think Lorelai didn't deliberately hide the engagement for so long. When she was about to tell Emily, Emily said something snide or critical. Lorelai couldn't bring herself to say it then, and maybehadn't gotten over that moment before she had another chance. Sookie must have thought she told her because she was operating off old information. Lorelai isn't great at updating people on stuff, or at least she seems to consder her emotional life her own personal business.

@petabulmer3317 7 месяцев назад

In another episode, I believe that Lorelai says "I don't know how to tell you things, Mom". I find it sad that they are such different characters. But every so often, their love for each other is shown instead of shown. That is a positive...