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Therapy and Theology: Good Guilt vs. Destructive Shame

Proverbs 31 Ministries with Lysa TerKeurst

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A note from Proverbs 31 Ministries: This podcast contains content that might not be suitable for young children, and may serve as a trigger due to circumstances in your past. Please see the Related Resources section at the bottom of this page if you need help finding a counselor.
Chances are, we all have been plagued by one of the heaviest, silent battles one can fight: shame.
The enemy wants us to believe this lie: we are isolated and stuck in carrying the weight of our sin and ultimately our own shame. But Jesus paved the way for us to live in freedom beyond the destructive weight and narrative that shame begs us to believe and live by.
In this introductory episode of a new Therapy and Theology series, Lysa TerKeurst dives deep into some of her own personal testimony and into conversation surrounding “Good Guilt v. Destructive Shame” with her personal, licensed professional counselor Jim Cress, as well as Proverbs 31 Ministries Director of Theology and Research, Joel Muddamalle.
In this episode you will…
- Learn the distinct differences between shame, guilt, conviction and condemnation and be equipped with tools to combat the specific lies associated with each of them.
- Overcome feeling disconnected and isolated by learning how to utilize healthy guilt that actually leads to healthy connection with God and others.
- Stop feeling alone in your shame struggle by applying practical tools and scripts for life-giving conversations with others that birth compassion, empathy and vulnerability.
Friend, God already sees you. He is ready for you to turn to him, even in the weight of the same you may feel. We pray this episode blesses you!
Related Resources:
- Ready to take the next step in finding a Christian counselor? Here’s a good place to find the right fit for you and your circumstances: American Association of Christian Counselors www.aacc.net
- List of Bible Verses from this conversation: Romans 8:1, Jeremiah 2:11b, 13, Deuteronomy 30:19, Ephesians 4:22-25, Exodus 3:7-8, 1 John 1:7
- Here’s the link to the Therapy and Theology episode on "Narcissism: What It Is and What It Isn't”: • Narcissism ... What It...
- Gain healthier ways to process your pain and learn to see your situations through truth-based perspectives with Lysa TerKeurst’s new devotional, Comment start Seeing Beautiful Again: 50 Devotions to Find Redemption in Every Part of Your Story. Get your copy here: www.p31booksto...
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Get daily devotions sent straight to your inbox: proverbs31.org...
Give God the first 5 minutes of your day with the FREE First 5 app: first5.org
Join our next Online Bible Study for free: proverbs31.org...
CONNECT WITH US ON SOCIAL MEDIA
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Instagram: / proverbs31ministries
Twitter: / proverbs31org

Опубликовано:

21 авг 2024

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Комментарии : 91

@barbarayoung5632 4 месяца назад

Thank God for this day & this show I lived in shame & guilt for over 30 years. God had already started to heal me about a month ago by making me aware of what was happening and then He blessed me to hear this show! Thank you so much for allowing God to use you to help me see myself even further! Thank You!!! ❤

@OfficialProverbs31Ministries 4 месяца назад

We’re so glad you enjoyed this!

@niklever73 3 года назад

Beautifully stated. Thank you all so much! God never wastes our pain. Keep healing Lysa!

@OfficialProverbs31Ministries 3 года назад

Thank you for watching, Nikki!

@eboronkay 3 года назад

Wow! This is the best session yet. Truly potentially life-changing wisdom here because it comes from The Word and people steeping in His presence. I sent this link to my Celebrate Recovery Ministry leader, my sponsor, my sponsees, my accountability partners, and my children. There are not words enough to adequately thank you for serving our Father God in this way.

@carynplatt9790 2 года назад

Thank you for speaking these truths! Thank you for your transparency, Lysa! You are such a blessing! May you experience the blessings of God in your life!

@gobigandgohomeschool4882 6 месяцев назад

Thank you for sharing the shame you eld for your abortion. I just want others who maybe reading this to know that free help is available. Pregnancy Resource Centers everywhere offer free post abortion counseling.

@betsyferrell 10 месяцев назад

27:21 thank you. Praising God for your ministry to us

@OfficialProverbs31Ministries 10 месяцев назад

Thank you!

@leonalirangues3340 Год назад

This is excellent. Every denomination should have this support. Best of theology and psychology. I wish my Catholic denomination would have more of this. Thank you.

@OfficialProverbs31Ministries Год назад

Thanks for watching!

@michelelovechrist9148 2 года назад

Beautiful lesson it helped me to me so much in understanding shame. And good guilt. Thank you so… much🌺

@skastner7684 8 месяцев назад

such a brilliant teaching + especially the combination of Theology with Counselling and personal experiences. I had so many "aha moments" when you shared about what shame does to the mind. It is sooo brilliant that I had to listen twice and surely will listen again + recommend this teaching. Thanks for sharing these helpful insights + mainly for all your efforts and research + all inputs you have given to make this such a relevant + helpful video.

@OfficialProverbs31Ministries 8 месяцев назад

Thanks for watching!

@user-wj6qe7gh6m 6 месяцев назад

THANK YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART‼This particular podcast brought so many confirmation, clarity and insight to my own situation that worth above and beyond second spent listening to it...THANK WARRIORS‼🔥💥☄

@tanyalenmark4194 Год назад

Love you Three , and you have blessed me so much Thank you💖 🍀🐇🌷have a lovely Easter Sunday.

@beckmarlow8055 2 года назад

Thank you Lord so happy for you all!!

@slloyd4278 Год назад

I am so blessed to have found ur channel I am a trained therapist but currently bk in therapy for so much past trauma. I am also in Faith & have struggled with the repressed memories & addiction. I am finding renewed hope. Getting support &have ended my relationship with alcohol. I am healing and ur conversation has made so much sense of me. Thank you☺️❤️🙏

@BrideofChrist11 3 года назад

Thank you so much.....this has really ministered to me.....just felt His Spirit throughout all this session !

@SR-hn4xf Год назад

This is absolutely fantastic video filled with so much wisdom 🙌

@OfficialProverbs31Ministries Год назад

Thanks for watching!

@ruthchaffer646 9 месяцев назад

Thank you Joel for all your deep studies of ancient cultures. It really helps me to understand the scriptures within their context and increases my faith. Thanks for digging these things up and sharing it with us👍👍👍

@OfficialProverbs31Ministries 9 месяцев назад

Thanks for watching!

@Thankful305 3 года назад

I love the 3 of you and cant get enough of these ! Please make more. It's remarkable how much insight I get listening to these! ❤ Gotta rename y'all.... "Therapy, Theology and the Thinker" Yes Lysa is a deep thinker! If she wasn't, she couldnt bring the truth of The Word to life, for the rest of us!

@OfficialProverbs31Ministries 3 года назад

Thank you for the encouragement, friend!

@eboronkay Год назад

I love this idea 🎉

@darlingprincess4822 4 месяца назад

Thank you so much Lisa, Joel and Jim.If the root of addiction is shame, God's answer is that we are to be rooted and grounded in Love. I used to know this, deeply. God brought me from the uttermost to the uttermost; from used and abused, crying on the doorsteps of a church, to speaking at the podium and conferences and teaching and leading from His Holy Word, by His Holy Spirit. But when one tragic event after another occurred, I drifted, lost in the trauma, barely breathing for lengths of time. Reaching for relief from the very physical pain, brought me to my knees again and again and again. I spoke recently for a dearly loved sister in Christ, who called me afterward to let me know of her grave concern, because I spoke from a dark place. The light of His redemptive power was muted from the stage that night. I was very tired, but the real problem was a revived sense of shame, rather than His wholly restorative Love, which she'd heard from me years prior. I cannot thank you enough for these broadcasts. "Return to saturate in My Word," I hear Him say. Thank you.

@OfficialProverbs31Ministries 4 месяца назад

Thank you for sharing your story with us, friend. We're so glad this video was helpful to you!

@stephaniechilds2932 3 года назад

Wow Lysa I had no idea we had so much in common! Thanks for being so transparent! I to had an abortion and have been healing for years now, I am now trying to start my own abortion recovery ministry!

@OfficialProverbs31Ministries 3 года назад

Thank you for sharing what's on your heart, friend!

@mistielmore4741 10 месяцев назад

I love this program, God so put you all together, thank y'all for hearts!

@OfficialProverbs31Ministries 10 месяцев назад

Thanks for watching!

@mistielmore4741 9 месяцев назад

Yes, y'all have really helped me!!

@HandmadeHomegrownArtist Год назад

Ty for everything ☺️🙏❤️

@OfficialProverbs31Ministries Год назад

Thanks for watching!

@michelynnmoss7253 Год назад

Thanks for this Beautiful message 🙏🏽

@OfficialProverbs31Ministries Год назад

Thanks for watching, friend!

@livewire5619 Год назад

great job as always.Good guilt( sorrow)

@zechariah4663 3 года назад

I love these!!!! Please make this permanent!! This is an on-time work and I love the title. I have often wondered why we as Christians cannot mix I therapy in theology. I divorced a narcissist after 16 painful years of marriage the last 6 years he has worked to alienate our daughter from me and 10 days ago I called the police and had her taken from my home. Well-meaning friends site biblical platitudes that only serve to increase my shame and make me feel that I'm not a good Christian because I doubt that God is really here for me. I have prayed and I have fasted and I have been the bigger person and I dealt with emotional abuse for 16 years and then another six years after the divorce. I'm living the Jobe existence and wondering what else God is going to allow the enemy to take from me. I am in counseling with a wonderful Christian counselor but this is hard day after day. I've purchased this devotion to have something tangible to look at and to clean too and to walk me through these really dark days. Thank you Lysa and proverbs 31 Ministries

@Thankful305 3 года назад

Father, you are the God who sees, El Roi! Wrap your infinite arms of Love around your daughter and heal her broken heart. Restore her soul! Bring the comfort of reassurance to Zechariah 4:6, that "You are there'! Refresh her Holy Spirit!! Restore her daughter back to loving connection with her. Reveal wisdom and understanding as she keeps her eyes on you and not the circumstances ....as hard as that is for us humans. Bless her~ In Jesus mighty name...AMEN!

@zechariah4663 3 года назад

@@Thankful305 Thank you😭😭😭😭😭

@Thankful305 3 года назад

@@zechariah4663 🤗 I am in a very similar situation. I get your pain. It's real. The enemy wants our eyes OFF of our magnificent, mighty JESUS. Just take His hand and let Him walk with you! It's not by might, nor by power but by His Spirit (❤ that verse!)...THAT Is your blessed assurance and assignment of faith, that can be relied upon 🤗 SHALOM ALEICHEM !!

@zechariah4663 3 года назад

@@Thankful305 This was the verse God gave me when I cried out to him at the ending of my marriage. I asked him how in the world I was going to do this. How was I going to escape this abuse. I was not very familiar with my Bible but I heard not by power nor by might. I then went to Google and did a search and this is what I found. I need him to answer me like he did back then

@OfficialProverbs31Ministries 3 года назад

Thank you for tuning in, friend. We're glad these have helped you! Be sure to subscribe to the channel so you can be notified of new episodes as soon as they release!

@courtneyharmsworth6048 3 года назад

Wow..... so powerful and informative. Thank you so much for this incredible resource ❤️

@OfficialProverbs31Ministries 3 года назад

We're glad this was helpful to you, Courtney!

@pattyhall9750 3 года назад

Thank you! I needed to hear this!

@OfficialProverbs31Ministries 3 года назад

We're glad this was helpful for you, Patty!

@wlestini 3 года назад

So good! Thank you

@OfficialProverbs31Ministries 3 года назад

Thank you for watching!

@mellissiad7281 Год назад

I recall when I was young and gave myself away before I was married I recall my eyes felt like I literally put on a new pair of glasses LITERALLY I felt grown up and I know now it was pride I heard clearly “ now u know how Adam and Eve felt when they sobbed in the garden “ Years later I revisited that and challenged that statement and said to the enemy “ you want to go there ok let’s see how God the Father covered me and cursed u!” My point is it’s not to make excuses for my sin but it was very much about my lack of understanding of Gods redemption Love and provision And he the enemy continued the process of the deception of garden

@claudiademaldonado6824 11 месяцев назад

Beautiful states Mellissa!

@elaineduran8903 2 года назад

Thank you so much for this. Helps especially the post of this which is spoken

@tracytabitha 3 года назад

I have so much to say but I think thank you so much sums it up

@OfficialProverbs31Ministries 3 года назад

We're glad these have helped you, Tracy!

@DenisePass-SeeingDeep 3 года назад

Beautiful truth!

@OfficialProverbs31Ministries 3 года назад

Thanks for listening!

@DenisePass-SeeingDeep 3 года назад

@@OfficialProverbs31Ministries My pleasure!!! Awesome truths!

@liliherndz5792 2 года назад

Psalm 51 LOVE LOVE LOVE …Exit RMP to HOLY TRINTY 🕊✝️🕊 inner HEAVEN Every single word you have spoken …Is a LIFE GIVING HEALTHY HUMAN CONNECTION …AMEN WHOM the SON ✝️ has SET FREE is TRULY FREE indeed …AMEN

@bn4194 3 года назад

Please pray for my teen son who seems to be running and making bad choices. His bio dad wasn’t in his life. He is staying away from a loving family and hanging around bad influences. Me as his mom am worried about this path he is on.

@dianaceballosarruda319 3 года назад

Hi. My family and I went through the same thing with my brother. Surround your son with prayer, the most powerful weapon. Always ask The Holy Spirit to lead your prayers. And whatever comes, make sure your son knows you love him ❤️

@mel3256 3 года назад

Remember prayer is action and is powerful. Roman 8:28 God can use all things for good. Your son's and your painful experiences can make you stronger and to show us how dependent we are on our heavenly father.

@OfficialProverbs31Ministries 3 года назад

Thank you for sharing, friend. We're praying for your son!

@eboronkay Год назад

BN, I’m praying for you and your family right now.

@rebeccahayhurst442 3 года назад

This was such a powerful and conversation. Thank you!

@OfficialProverbs31Ministries 3 года назад

Thank you for watching!

@johnnycalderon833 Год назад

You for this video❤

@michelekeck7716 2 года назад

Thank you for these wonderful series,l appreciate it all so much and you all complent each other in the beautiful dance and flow of what you have to give from your roles and giftings.may I ask the theologian pleas why in Ephesians sometimes the deity was called Diana and sometimes Artemis.i received some ministry once for an informative influence concerning my tendency to seek knowledge through excessive reading,amongst the other associations with the deity of Ephesians combined then with a somewhat spirit of independence.lfelt grateful as always do at God,s revelation but bewildered,hurt and embarrassed at my counselors annoyance with me as l perceived it ,that as a Christian of a long time it should not have been necessary.they seemed exasperated and disappointed that it be so, in my spiritual journey. This may have been my perception.as I said I was surprised, hurt and bewildered.during the following week,I would dissociately become like a little child and give out an involuntary cry,mummy. Iws unwellfor about 2 months after.as an adult I knew intellectually there were some things mentioned that I knew were generational and thought they had been already dealt with,hence my surprise,but they did not know that. Is this an example of child deep trauma emerging in my subsequent responses and illness. God is always ministering into our deepest heart places in his tender and unfathomable love, constantly bringing us along out of true and false shame, reshaping us again and again eternally into his beautiful image .all praise and glory be to him in Christ Jesus.

@amandakate1247 3 года назад

Self Hatred At My Expense

@OfficialProverbs31Ministries 3 года назад

Jim's insight is so helpful!

@stevedavies8703 3 года назад

Maybe I don't understand this subject fully, but shame is not all negative; surely to repent is to accept reproach for the wickedness of our actions, and that obviously involves a level if shame. This makes the words of Jesus understandable when he said, unless you hate yourself, you cannot be my disciple

@suefagan7528 2 года назад

That is not accurate at all. We should hate our SIN but not ourselves. Dig deep into the bible and you will see what a loving gracious God we serve.

@stevedavies8703 2 года назад

@@suefagan7528 Your certainly missing the mark! Hate our sin? Sounds like ownership. We are to hate all sin: GOD does. If you have sin, you are in a state of rebellion and lost. The idea that you can have any sin and be in fellowship with GOD is antichrist.

@suefagan7528 2 года назад

@@stevedavies8703 ok Steve. Well I'm not trying to get you worked up but give me chapter and verse where Jesus says unless you hate YOURSELF you cannot be my disciple.

@eboronkay Год назад

The self we are to hate is the one we were before Christ made us new. That self, not the justified being sanctified self who lives because Christ lives in me, is the self to hate. I had to hate her to let her go. I had to hate her for spending so long thinking she could solve her own problems. I had to hate her pride and ego to surrender completely. Years down the line now I see her with the compassion that our Father God obviously had toward me in order to pursue me and adopt me. I still struggle with rebellion around food and exercise which are the sins of gluttony and sloth. Yet I know that I am loved in the same way, but exponentially better, that I have continued to love my children in their rebellion, when they were doing things that I knew were harmful. I don’t hate myself now because myself is in Christ, being perfected (with much stumbling) until the day when I see Christ’s face and He will finish me perfectly in that moment.

@casmccann3036 2 года назад

You said you were going to be sure we had access to cards because there were so many verses. How can I find them?

@jessie_cutebunny Год назад

Conviction is the cry of a baby saying its diaper needs changing. Condemnation is the diaper rash that results after not dealing with the mess, whether big or small.

@MM-vg4du 3 года назад

So by design, how can we claim the we are children of a good and capable god when 2/3 od our brain systems are incapable to respond adequately to external threat ?🤔

@Isthishandletakenalready 9 месяцев назад

How is self glorification a form of self hatred, please expound, thanks!

@jclilstar1973 2 года назад

Will there be any new videos from you three coming up soon?

@eboronkay Год назад

There’s a wonderful new series that just started a few weeks ago.

@patrickcasey4609 2 года назад

So can you explain why religion condemns new born baby's are born into sin, creating shame from the onset ?

@eboronkay Год назад

That is not a shaming truth, just truth. Because we are genetically connected to Adam and Eve, their sin is passed to us. A newborn seems innocent. Watch that infant become a toddler. Mine and No are among first words. Mine is our inherent inherited self-centeredness. No is our inherent inherited rebellion against authority. The ultimate authority is God. Rebellion against God is sin. Thus we come to the truth that we are born sinful.

@patrickcasey4609 Год назад

You have a man made believe system. The above interview is rubbish they are earning money that is their living keeping the negative narrative of living in this world going. Ask yourself if there's life for ever after why do we spend billions on keeping people alive You couldn't make it up or could you!