THIS WASN"T A SONG BUT A LOOK INTO A SOUL! Ex Metal Elitist Reacts Nightwish "Poet and the Pendulum" 

If this heartfelt outcry does not touch you, you may not have a soul.

Tuomas singing his mother's words aloud while not having a mic at all is one of the reasons why this hits so much more as a video and not just a track.

when floor starts singing, be still my son you're home.......i have never been able to stop the tears in my eyes.

When my wife's bipolar disorder was at its most uncontrolled, this song, and especially this chorus, kept me going, kept me alive, because I KNEW someone out there UNDERSTOOD pain, understood that when you're the strong shoulder someone is crying on, you can't cry, and when you face the world with all of your own pain, you show one happy face to the world and your true face to your inner self, your God....private, for no one else, because you CAN'T. There were days on my 1-2 hour commute I listened to this song on repeat, over and over and over again. Thank you, Tuomas.

The emotion in Floor's eyes goes into your soul.

I don't care how many times I hear this song - it always brings tears to my eyes. The thing that gets me the most is Floor quietly whispering Thank You to close the song- are you kidding me?

Very few people realize how much courage it takes to be this vulnerable, to show the whole damn world the very depth of your soul knowing that human beings can be incredibly cruel and equally capable to heal and to inflict even more pain.

There is no other singer that can bring the emotion to a song than Floor, by far the best female voice on the planet....

The Poet and the Pendulum was written after firing Tarja the original singer. She was the face of Nightwish at the time, and Tuomas (Keyboards) wrote this and considered her a muse to many of the songs he had written at that point. They had also grown up in the same city and knew each other since early childhood. All the band members decided together to fire her for acting too much of a diva And her husband & Manager was stepping way outta bounds concerning the band business He always wanted more money , only big paying show but the band did it for the love of music and there fans . According to all the band members, Tarja was missing lots of rehearsals and would not even travel with the band anymore. Tuomas was painted as the devil by many fans, and went through a deep depression. He even considered ending the band . He wrote The Poet and the Pendulum at that time, and actually kills himself in the song. He said he killed himself in the song at the 10:00 time stamp , as to kill the pain he was going through . To this day every time he plays it, it takes him back to those feelings, and shows on his face. In the last part, Mother and Father, words are said to him that his real mother said to him at that time of his deep depression. One part that touches me at the end when the guitarist Emppu and bassist Marko, the only other two involved with firing Tarja (that were still active with the band)were standing with Tuomas at the end in solidarity and love., NOTE : the 1st two words are (The End) and the last two words are (The Beginning) representing the end of the 1st era of Nightwish and the beginning of the next era

''I can not cry, cause the shoulder cries more'' Damn....that always hits me. I had a same experience as Tuomas, with media, politicians and so called friends betraying you, writing the most horrible things about you, you don't recognize. It kept on going for months, years....journalists on my frontdoor while my daughter of 4 years old opened the door (I was behind her) they pretended to deliver a package and stuck the microphone in my face , with his shoes between my door. I was a specialized nurse, very ill (cancer at age 34) operations and chemo and lots of time to think. I wanted to do something good for my profession and all the nurses who work ther butts of for little money. I was naive and an idealist. Not a hardcore politician. When I found out that large amounts of money were missing (corruption) and asked for the conviential files , it took me 3 months to get them and pages were missing. I went in a debate and I am strong with words. They could not deal with me, so the head of the region called HIS newsaper (subsidised by these people) and they wrote the most horrific things abbout me. Even me being a nazi ( something I despite, I am jewish myself and have a very multicultural family) It is inhuman what people do to eachother without any remorse. So when the open letter (written by the whole band, not only tuomas) backfired and the media, Fnnish politicians, fans and ''friends; haunted him down in the media....I know so well how that feels. There are no words for. Defending yourself makes it worse, you just have to swallow it. My shoulders where aso extremely upset and I had not really a strong shoulder to cry on. Demonizing people (what they also did to Tuomas) is horrible and the consequences are enormous. I really could not deal with it anymore. My name was ruined, by cruel people and I lost everything. First my marriedge, my job, my house and without a house, I could not have my sweet daughters with me, who really wanted to stay with mom (they were all three very young) Homeless, nobody wants to hire you, the hardest part...my children. I am happy Tuomas could write this song, to get rid of his 'ghosts'. I did want to end my life and I messed up, being in hospital for months and tr to walk again. Still my joy and passion is gone. It broke me and the pieces are to small to fix. I can hear this song maybe once a month, because it's too close for me. After 8!!!! years fighting for a home I finally have a place for me and my daughters. That's what makes me happy, allthough it all still haunts me. thank you for your reaction Cosmos.

I was at that concert - 12.500 people in awe and salt in our eyes. Nobody in this galaxy are able to express emotions, passion and feelings, so hard and effectively, that everybody in the arena, lives it - like Floor. We know that Tuomas have the technicians kill Floor's voice in his earplugs during the ending - of course he has. She is insanely powerful !! This whole concert was a roller-coaster of emotions and feelings - and this one particular crushed our minds. It's far beyond music - it's art performed in it's purest form. This is real music - this is Nightwish with Floor in front ❤

No matter how many times I've seen this video, I still have the goosebumps, chills, and hair standing on end. I also tear up with emotions of sadness. While many other videos, no matter how often I've seen them, I always have the goosebumps, chills, and hair standing on end. I have such a feeling of awe of the music and Floor's voice and vocals it brings me to tears in a good way. They are tears of appreciation and a state of being awe struck. The first video I saw Floor in was Ghost Love Score at Wacken 2013. I was so moved by many emotions. I have probably viewed it well over 100 times, watching how others react to seeing Nightwish for the first time with that video. It is the number one video of reaction videos of all time on RU-vid. Some reactions you might hear are the ones seeing it for the first time, they never heard of Nightwish. Then some even say why is this anyone's first time. I gave purchased many DVD's and CD's of Nightwish. Nightwish is the band I would most like to see live someday. I know and have the feeling you are going to enjoy the journey of music and performances live and in concert.

This is one of those songs that helped me cry (weep!) when I needed to but didn't know how to on my own. Music is therapy. I'm so grateful to Nightwish. You have a beautiful heart, brother.

One of the Most beautiful pieces written by a Modern composer. Tuomas is an absolute GENIUS. Thanks Nightwish🤘 Thank You so Much from the Netherlands 🇳🇱 Kiitos 🇫🇮

My favorite amongst all the amazing Nightwish songs. Tuomas can write such amazing songs, and Floor has such a way to make you feel the emotions thru her vocals. Such a talented band.

Thinking of you, friend Cosmic, and your gentle soul. You are not alone as you process this song. While I haven't commented before, it doesn't mean you haven't touched my heart.

Nightwish is my top favorite band. I am metal guy, this symphonic metal music by Tuomas hits me every time. I was seeing them live June 16th 2023, I tell you, if you have a chance to go seeing them live, go! It was so great and my heart burned for them, forever ❤And the last song they performed (usually they play that song) was The Greatest Show On Earth. Man that was beyond epic live 🤘Great reaction, keep going. Greetings from Finland, Oulu city 😎

Tuomas is a genius, and extremely empathetic human being, and watching him perform this song is exhilarating and heartbreaking at the same time. This song is exceptional in every way, but it needed Floor, she took it to another level.

Don’t apologize for your emotions. That’s what makes your channel interesting in a sea of reaction channels. Seeing you so affected by music, especially by my favorite band, Nightwish, and sharing what/why you are feeling, is vulnerable and opens your listeners/watchers up, too. Nightwish gives me so many feelings and an outlet for same that I hadn’t tapped into in a long time. This is not background music!

Tuomas is a genius composer, man and the music, the words yeah Amazing

Tuomas is a genius poet and floor perfectly portrayed the character he wrote about in this song perfectly. So fucking happy I discovered these guys when I was in the lowest point of my life. They helped me alot

I loved your reaction, I was waiting for this one. It's big, to me it's the ultimate Nightwish song. Maybe even in this particular performance. All band members are at their absolute best, having the perfect chemistry to totally bring it to the masterpiece it is. Tiny piece of feedback: please just watch the video till the very end. Including the applause, sometimes you miss out on some nice gestures and details because you tend to stop half a minute before it ends.

This opus is genius..... Thanks for doing "it" this way and not in reality, Tuomas. We need your music.... and to see you singing along to this!!!! Thank you also to Anette Olzon for making this possible to be heard....... if not for you being there...... Marko sang the demo - all of it darker, grittier, nastier..... 9:53 "3 minutes & counting....." - 12:53 Tuomas "cuts" his head off! Such details in the midst of all that emotion! "Dead Boys Poem" is another telling introspective Tuomas revelation.... Floor's empathy, as always, shines!

yeah dude, 45 year old man over here in mississippi just steady flowing tears to this every damn time... it just hits. thanks for the reminder, be well.

I Can feel the pain and anguish, feel the sorrow, as Tuomas shares this beautifully composed song. And Floor's voice! It just reaches deep into my heart. You're right, this is more than just a band. This song has been here for me when I couldn't express myself. Thank you for sharing this today. And thank you for creating this space for us all to connect and share.

This song is a true masterpiece and I am glad this exceptional recording exists because I don't think it will be performed live again (notwithstanding the band on touring hiatus). I am so relieved Tuomas had a way to find catharsis through music because the turmoil, the crisis, the voices inside that tell you to go are so dangerous that there was a chance we could have lost him.

Well done. You know Cosmic, you end your videos with some very positive messages, usually sending a single uplifting message, priceless for sure for those who need to hear it. I want to pass one on to you now, echoing Tuomas' beautiful affirmation from the last verse, "You have such oceans within". Take care of yourself, and thanks for great reaction.

such a powerful performance i have been listening to nightwish since 2002 and all i can say is even since floor jansen stepped to that mic she is some holy fire

Thanks for your reaction, Wolff! NW is an example of great synergy of brilliant composer and song writer, outstanding musicians, perfect voices and amazing spirit! Love them soooooo much! ❤

Without a doubt, this is the finest piece of rock music ever written.

I feel that a The Greatest Show On Earth will be here soon. You will regret not choosing the Tampere version! Also, Dead Boys Poem is also a must.

It took me a long time to listen to this without crying, this song touch so deeply 😢

Nightwish since 1999 and journey continues

Nightwish - was - is - and will - never be just a band - Nightwish is an extremely close-knit family and that includes even the fans. On the one hand, this makes the band strong, but it also makes the fans strong. Unfortunately, such a positive interaction is far too rare in today's world. Go to a Nightwish concert and you'll be able to feel it outside the stadium or hall.

it's beautiful and kind of rare to see one react like the way you do - you feel very honest and true to you self about your feelings and are not afraid to show it, and I admire that . I have personally shed alot of tears to this song but only when i've been all alone. thank you once again for a great reaction and keep it up man!

One of the most, if not THE most, emotionally hard-hitting pieces of music ever made at least to my knowledge. This performance still leaves me all teary-eyed every damn time, the whole song is like a giant steamroller of emotions and then to top it all, that last "mother and father" part with Floor singing those lines like an absolute siren and Marko harmonising along..., if that doesn't pull your heartstrings i don't think you have any. Beautiful reaction man, you're obviously a thoughtful guy with depth to your soul and that's always welcome in a time when empty barrels make the most noise.

This is a masterpiece by Tuomas sung by the best female voice, so touching. Always gets to me 🥹

This song makes me cry every time

This was Tuomas....erm...unaliving himself in music so he didn't do it for real. Turning to his art to express himself. Save himself. If this doesn't move you, I don't want to know you. This is a genius baring his soul.....raw humanity on display. They don't play it often, but I am glad there's a record of it somewhere. It should be recorded and witnessed for the ages.

A truly unique piece of musical artistry. Tuomas showing his inner being and his soul to the world. Respect for being man enough to allow us into his inner emotions.

This one is another really heart wrenching song from the heart of our metal Mozart, Tuomas Holopainen. It is incredible on so many levels that it just drives a spike through your soul. I loved your reaction to this masterpiece.

This song for me so perfectly encapsulates the absolute swirling, manic, desperate chaos that is your mind when trying to process trauma, angst, depression and what other might wrongfully judge you for. All of this is, as you said, is usually kept behind a neutral mask so no one can see the storms inside. It is a very, very painful and lonely process. In the end you are very lucky if you find someone who can anchor you, like in the end of this song. Not someone to cure, calm or fix you but just an unjudging anchor that enables you to go through the process. In the end the feeling that lingers in one of sad acceptance, but with the ability to start anew. Damn, this comment turned out way more poetic than I initially intended but I can't think of any other song that is appropriate for this. Love your Nightwish reactions, looking forward to more of them! (I recommend Seven Days to the Wolves🙂)

Nightwish Army South Germany Division Nightwish is much more than a band. They are like a family, closely connected. When Floor first came to them, they probably didn't realize how quickly and how tightly the gang grew and bonded with their arrival. Thuomas is the head but Floor is the heart and soul of the group. And you could see how strong these ties are when Thuomas said later that Floor isn't the third singer, but the final one. You have searched ..... and found. And this is exactly what makes Nightwish so unique. About the masterpiece: It was a difficult and hard time for Thuomas and the others. He wrote all this from the soul when he created this very personal masterpiece. And it hurts, as you can clearly see in several close-ups. This was also the reason that Emppu stood next to him for so many minutes to give him mental support. It is said that he asked the sound engineer to block Floor's voice from his earphones. It would have been even harder and more painful to hear her voice. And her quiet thanks only came from her after she had convinced herself that Thuomas was fine. At the same time, this was the end of an era and the beginning of a new one. The first two words were : The End and the last two : The Beginning. That says it all.

PSA full disclosure coming... i am a type to bury my feelings. Sometimes for me, certain NW songs are a way to let loose, in a safe way. This is one of the songs, Tuomas and Floor can make me feel again. But enough about me, this again is a piece of art and yes, Tuomas baring it all for everyone to see. TY cosmic for the parting words and caring thoughts, they are appreciated and everyone needs to hear them from time to time. You are loved, you are needed, you are valued, you DO matter in this world! Peace and love all!

they don't make hits they make pieces of music such good composers such beautiful music the

"tx God for health, tx for the love of friends and family, and tx for Tuomas Holopaïnen 🤟" that's me before bed 😄

This is my special song from NW...it's the one that touches me the most.

Nightwish Army :D still happy when somebody discovers their wonderful songs

There is a demo of this song on You Tube that features Marco doing all the vocals, so I'm guessing the song was written before they hired Anette Olzon. Probably re-worked the arrangements a bit for her for the album version. But Floor sings with such an emotional connection to the song it just makes it even more impactful. No wonder Tuomas had the sound engineer turn off the vocals in his earpiece when they used to play this in concert. Don't think they play it anymore live.

Great reaction this song never gets old and touches your soul Tuomas is a poet and an empath and shares his soul in his music he doesn't just write music for music sake like many other bands but shares a piece of himself and that connects with many of us. His music may not be ordinary but is unique like the fine wine he drinks.

The line "I can't cry, cause the shoulder cries more" kind of sums up the anguish that Tuomas felt when you realize that the shoulder that he cried on was Tarja's.

I absolutely love your reactions to NW. You give it the "reverence" that it deserves. Thank you.

Heart strings tugged, to the point of breaking. Brows beaten. Soul Scoured. Innocence burned upon a pyre.

Great reaction dude, its always wonderful when people understand the depth of this piece, infact of Nightwish music, in general - its not just catchy choruses, heavy riffs or whatever else that people look for in music, this is the scenery of Tuomas's soul, his very being made music - and brought to life by a band who aren't just great musicians, but also deeply empathic, who feel this deeply themselves. Great reaction dude 🤘

That song moved me. I tattooed the pendulum at the back of my left calf like 5 years ago.

Great reaction dude. Your words are real. I'm glad to hear you. I love those guys. They are part of my life. Thanks man.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts and emotions with us ! Your intro is very kind to us. I can't talk about this peculiar song wich I can't hear without a tear. Eveyrone reacts emotionnally to different type of song; Floor's voice mixd with Marlo's one and the riffs and rhythms at the beginning make this song one of my tissue song.

3 minutes and counting; the time you have before drowning. And when you count it's exactly 3 minutes before the blade falls.

I used to cry like a baby at the end of this song, but thankfully, 500 listens later i think I'm over it 😂😂

This is just one of Tuomas’es masterpieces!🤘🎸

When "mother & father" starts my eyes always get wet like I´m chopping a bag of onions...

Only a few words. You fell this Masterpiece from Tuomas. Great reaction 🤘🤗greetings from nothern Germany

I think the reason this song can be so powerful on a personal level is that you experience the torment and then the healing. It´s absolutely incredible how it has helped me process pain and to experience beauty again. Kiitos Tuomas

Thank you for a Great reaction🤘🇫🇮

Floor's haunting siren wailing at the end of the song, reaches me to my bones every time.

Every time when i hear that spoken part more less in the middle of the song which says "3 minutes and counting" and after exactly 3 minutes in the song Tuomas making that blade cutting his head off gesture i have massive goosebumps

This Wembley and Tampere recordings are great, both from the same tour in 2015. A must have in your dvd/blu-ray collection, along with Wacken of course.

Thanks

Traduzir em palavras o que esta obra-prima representa pra mim, é claramente uma tarefa impossível! Com amor infinito ao Nightwish! Obrigado Tuomas, por tudo...

Slaying The Dreamer

When you stand on the precipice of suicide, you are often angry. You are sad, and with that sadness is anger, a desire to blame someone (or more), and that is reflected subtly in this song. It is hard to hear if you have stood at that edge. I suppose Floor has massive strength to sing this without having a problem. Her ability to detach while still putting feeling into this is astonishing. Anette had to sing this at one NW concert. That one day, she found out she lost a custody hearing. When singing this song during the concert, she lost her composure and went running off stage. Dark Passion Play is well named. Many of the songs are angry or sad. One song never played live or even in a video "Master, Passion, Greed" is sung by Marco only and was directed at Tarja's husband. "Bye, Bye, Beautiful" was aimed at Tarja herself. These triggered the Tarja song "Enough". Both Tuomas and Tarja took a LOT of crap in the Finnish media. One Finnish government official publicly dumped on Tuomas. Tarja would eventually move out of the country. A public letter firing her after the private letter was not a good thing looking back. Business is business, and if they could have just agreed to buy out Tarja's remaining year (which she may have sued for anyway), they could have made separate or together announcement of her leaving and people might have been disappointed, but moved on. Between airing the dirty laundry and purposely embarrassing Tarja by releasing the letter, Tarja was bound to respond. Tarja appeared on TV crying and answering questions. She was just fired, humiliated by the public airing of the letter, how was the band expecting her to respond? Tarja got the solo career she wanted. NW moved on and became more popular. With the expansion of the Internet and reactions seen on YT, there has been an expanding audience for a lot of artists.

Great reactions , just waiting for : Nightwish greatest show on earth .. kiitos 🇫🇮

If something, this song makes me tear up, every single time.

🤩👌💥💯🎼 "The end ....... The beginning" And Helluwa Lot in between, lyrically... Neat reaction män and keep on rockin with this magical band. Warm greets from Finland. 🤘😎 🇫🇮 💙

It was my first Nightwish song too - a friend at work gave me a heads up to check out this new album from a band I’d never heard of, which was Dark Passion Play. So my first song of their was “Poet…” … I didn’t know what I was in for when I hit play, but it was a wild an beautiful ride, as was the rest of the album, and I also used his collection to listen to “Once”, which is still my fave NW album to this day. Then I got into the back catalogue, and Imaginaerum when that was released, and I did get to see them live here in Sydney in about 2008. Now that I know about the Tarja’s dismissal, the open letter, the fans backlash etc, the song means so much more, and I can understand why it’s painful to Tuomas … the quote of his that he killed himself in this song so he didn’t have to do it in real ife is a staggering admission, and we’re all the better for him delivering this catharsis! … but even without the subtext, it’s a masterpiece of a song, and Floor’s vocals in this show are just the icing on the cake

If you like emotional roller coasters then you should check out the band Insomnium and to be more specific -> INSOMNIUM- Godforsaken feat. Johanna Kurkela (OFFICIAL VIDEO). Johanna is the wife of Nightwish Tuomas. Another good emotional track -> Swallow the Sun - Cathedral Walls (Official Music Video). Drummer in that song is current Nightwish Drummer (Kai Hahto) and the female singer is the second one of the Nightwish female lead Singers (between Tarja and Floor), Anette Olzon. Those two songs would be amazing reaction video material as well 😉.

Hi 😄 or good morning. Watching you since your first reaction but didn't say Hallo 😶. Thank you for your reactions, warm words and an enthusiasm, that makes one 😃. Greetings from Germany 🤗 and Parkinson's sucks ⚘ but EMPPU RULES 😎🤘 alex

Skimming the comments I think everything's been said, a hauntingly beautiful masterpiece, thank you for your great and understanding reaction to this unbelievable song, band and of course composer 🇬🇧

Hermano. Creo que todos tenemos algún dolor interno y este tipo de obras maestras nos ayudan a sanar un poco. Saludos hermano 🤘

It was so hard time for him specially but also for the rest of the band...what happened in 2005. He puts out his feelings here with so majestic and emotional way at the same time. This is their first song ever without Tarja. Tuomas was about to end NW but fortunately not. Check also "Bye Bye Beautiful" and "Master Passion Greed" both dealing the same issue.

Wow I wasn’t expecting that! This was amazing to watch!

Like your reaction. Tuomas’ Nightwish songbook is itself great, but then there is Poet. It stands alone as his magnum opus, quite unbelievable the soul baring emotion within. And add Floor. I do love Annette, the original singer, but only Floor carries each nuance of emotion, not just singing it but fully living it. This composition, and this performance are truly a high water mark of artistic achievement,

That piece of music can make grown men cry. You look deep into the soul of Tuomas at a time when darkness has taken over, but at the same time so beautiful and full of hope 🙂

This is the masterpiece, this live performance that got me hooked on Nightwish and Floor 16 months ago having reached 56 years of age and having not heard of them before. Tuomas at 15:06 gets me every time as does Floor always. Thank you to my good friend who pestered me in to listening to this phenomenal band. 🙏😊👍❤️

And now you know why Tuomas said no-one will perform this after Floor. Her empathy shone through this song. And perhaps now listen to her singing an earlier song performed in Buenos Aires in 2018/19, Dead Boys Poem. So beautiful and moving.

We are happy to share this journey with you Cosmic! My free tip for the day is this: In many countries/languages, the letter J is pronounced as a Y. So, Tarja = Tarya and Jansen = Yansen. That said, there is nothing wrong with the Americanized pronunciation, even if it is technically incorrect. In the same vein, the W in German is pronounced like a V, so Wacken = Vahken.

I swear, have never made it and pretty surely will never make it through the song without shedding a tear, well, actually crying like a baby... such a masterpiece on every level. Incredible what music is able to do with us..

masterpiece enough said

You´re good man , really good , a good person , up next. please!! Master passion greed .

I really appreciate your reactions. Tuomas and Floor are true masters at expressing emotions through music. And that is the essence of music.

This beginning part of this song is my favourite.

The brilliance, nuance and mastery of Tuomas’ songwriting and lyrics never ceases to amaze me. If you run a timer from where he says “I have 3 minutes and counting “ it is at 3 minutes when he simulates with his hand the pendulum cutting his throat. Amazing!🤘🤘

It's an effort to understand The Poet, everything is said, but nothing is said out loud. It's not until you have read both letters, read online, seen interviews and read the excellent analysis that's out there that you can begin to truly understand everything that's written between the lines. That's when you can put what's suggested into context and understand the big picture with all its details. That's when you graduate The Nightwish Academy. For me this became an obsession, I bought the books by Poe and King and even a bible to get the references in Marko's part.

Also I’m pretty sure the Minnesota wild used this song as their goal song in the playoffs a few years back. One of the heavy parts

Such a great song, yet.. the only song i rarely listen too because it has such a heavy topic that i kind of have to be in the right mindset for, to listen to. That does not take anything away from the greatness of this song though, it's Nightwish, they never deliver half-baked songs, it's always perfection. But yeah... let's just say there have been people in my life, who needed this song more than anything, but never got to know it, so yeah.. not an easy song. Ty for a truly great reaction and understanding the meaning behind the song, catch ya in the next one Cosmic :)

There are 3 songs that have the power to make me cry. This is one of them . Thanks, Cosmic, for this reaction!

Piece of art!!

This has to be one of the greatest bands ever.

This is the song that forever hooked me to nightwish. I can’t think of anything artistic that speaks more to me than this song. I have cried so many times to this it’s almost impossible.

This song gets me every single time, it is a true masterpiece of writing, and this was the perfect performance of the song, The Poet was about Tuomas's feelings around the firing of Tarja, I think Tuomas really loved Tarja but hated what she became with her husband. A great song to watch is "I want my tears back" live from Buenos Aries in 2018, to see the other side of Floor, her reaction to the crowd before tha song even started was so playful and joyous, I absolutley love this song, it always make even the worst of days so much better