Lyrics: [Intro: Tiny] How we doin' tonight everybody? [City Council Member #1] Good. [Tiny] That's good. Aight. [Verse 1: Tiny] YO. Irving City Council. How ya doin? My name is Tiny, and I'm a professional sports gambler. But unfortunately, my career, Is at a standstill, Because I got six baby mamas, All in the DFW metroplex. So I can't live in a state that's got, Illegal gambling. And since-, It would be March Madness, I'm coming up here to beg y'all, To make sports gambling, Legal in the city, So I can stack my paper, And pay for the illitimate, illegi- illlegtimate, Childrens. I know some people think sports betting is risky, But I got an unbeaten system, That can put money in all y'all pockets. Seriously. [Verse 2: Tiny] My system is easy: I bet on the blackest and darkest teams in college sports, Because, uh, blacker the berry, Sweeter the juice, and better the jump shot. I also got a sports betting angle, That is foolproof. Since y'all want to let these, All these transgenders, Up in the league- That is fool- -proof Since y'all want to let all these- Transdinners up in the league, I became almost a millionaire, Bettin' on Lia Thomas' big ass, Winnin' all them swimming meets. And just like these transgender swimmers? My swimmers are strong. That's why I got so many baby mamas. But you know what that means? I got a lotta bills to pay. So I'm sick of riskin' my life, And my freedom on gamblin', Illegally, On transgender athletes. [Chorus: Tiny] So I beg you, Irving City Council, To please legalize sports gambling, Because I can't afford, To be up in the pss- Penitentiary, Doin' five to ten years, On some weak ass gambling charge. [Bridge: Tiny] I also would like t- Like it if y'all could, uh- Give me some uh, reper- Repers-, uhhh, repertations, Because Irving is hella white, And I'm hella black. My great grandfather, Was a slave in Mississippi, So y'all owe me s-, for real. [City Council Member] One minute left. [Verse 3: Tiny] And I'll s- I'll say one more time You white city council people needa legitimize, Gambling, And start puttin', Y'all's money, On these transgender swimmers, Because they got, Propellers in their back friendly swimsuits. And remember, to always bet on black. [Outro] I always want to shoutout, To my homie, Demarcus Callaway, Who is locked up for murder, But he didn't do anything wrong, But stab a police officer, Which is 'cording to the BLM movement, Is okay. It's time to get paid, bitches. Legalize it, And free my homie Demarcus. [City Council Member] Okay.
