Top 10 Weapons in Three Houses By People Who Don't Fire Emblem 

Broke: Sword of the Creator Woke: V I S K A M

The only time "Number 1 will surprise you!" has been a true statement. I don't know what I was expecting, but it certainly wasn't that.

Mekkah: makes fun of guide The Gamer: *bold move for someone within recover range*

Clearly they missed out the ultimate weapon in the entire franchise : the allmighty *vulnerary*

I audibly gasped at number 1 wtf...

Top 8 best weapons in 3 Houses: Number 8: Caeda's Wing Spear

“If you have Sylvain, get it, but it’s not a bad choice for other fighters.” if you don’t have sylvain... you can’t Get the lance of ruin??

I paused the video before number 1 and honestly tried to guess what it was gonna be. I threw out stuff like Bohr X, Luna, Ballistas or even Gambits and AOE Divine Beast attacks. But I thought: "Clearly this person hasn't played the game before, so judging by the fact that there were no spells yet, he probably doesn't understand that tomes are also weapons, in a way." My expectations were exceeded.

I really like the "If you have Dimitri it's a no brainer" part for the Areadbhar as if you could optain it without having him in your team.

*Sees "The Gamer"* Oh boy, this is gonna be so bad it's so good.

Ah yes, who doesn't remember the best part of Three Houses being the ability to oneshot enemies reliably with a healing spell?

That number 1 entry rivals Edelgard’s S-rank CG in terms of laughter.

I remember Viskam for its extraordinary description: "Leather Shield"

I learned many things from this article: - 65 hit is reliable because it is above 50%, that's like more than half the time - Combat arts can only be activated while using legendary weapons and only by the user with an associated crest - Bow users cannot attack at 1 range in this game - Viskam is obtainable by player characters and is the only viable sword - Fortress Knights are the best unit type because they can use axes, which dominate the list mind you - Lysithea is the best axe unit - Recover is a tome and is the most damaging weapon in the game with the highest overall combined might and hit (with the beneficial secondary ability to heal allies)

I love the Viskam! Paired it with a Crest of Manchester holder, it obliterates enemies like insects in my Crimson Moonlight route.

Yeah, The Gamer has a lot of "questionable" articles. I just happened to find their 'Top 10 Best Dancers in 3H". If you're wondering how bad it was, well... Not only did they put the Lords down & ignore their personal classes, they also had their #1 be Manuela. You know, a character who is literally UNABLE to become a dancer (I'm also pretty sure that list got updated, because I could swear they had Byleth on there too when I checked it the first time).

16:30 "A book" They didn't even realize this game doesn't use tomes

The Gamer: This weapon would be higher if it had better durability Also The Gamer: This "weapon" is number one with the worst durability out of all these weapons

"This weapon is good. It has X durability, X might, X hit, and X crit." Gutpunching analysis

Ok... so the only possible explaination I can possibly think of, is that they genuinly didn't play the game and the ONLY bit of research they did for this article was looking at the List of Weapons page on the fire Emblem Wiki, because that page has the Faith book icon for each of the Faith spells, and it lists Recover at having 30MT but doesn't actually specify anywhere that it can only heal... The fact that the entry on the list with the highest damage of all the devastating weapons is something called 'Recover' and they didn't think twice is embarassing. Also that explains why the Viskarm is on the list, because that weapon is also on the same page, but isn't listed on that page as being enemy only so they didn't bother checking further.

Copied from theGamer themselves: "TheGamer Fact Checking Policy 100% Accurate Headlines We strive for 100% accurate headlines and apply a rigorous vetting process to every news article on the site. Rumors and insider reports are identified accordingly to ensure distinction between confirmed information and industry buzz that is of interest to our readers. Before any article is written, we ensure the information is new and accurate. We verify sources and always dig down to the original source (and reference material if applicable) before the writing process begins...." I realize this is for their "news" articles but c'mon.

Ben is playing the route where you steal the lance of ruin from Miklan (so you don’t need to recruit sylvain to get it) and then you use the lance to kill kronya so Jeralt is playable. In this route the death knight (with crusher) is in the holy mausoleum so you team up with Edelgard and Rhea to defeat him

Maybe benjimin baker is the AI of three houses, and that's how he's used the viskam and why he knows nothing about fire emblem

This man really wrote "Sword with a range of 9" and thought "This is fine"

Me at #5: Assuming the author was under the delusion the Viskam is obtainable, how ignorant do you have to be to not rank a 20mt 100 hit 1-9 range sword better than anything else in the game? Oh.

It honestly looks like he just ordered the weapons from least might to most might

In other words: "We made an AI read FETH datamines and write an article"

This was the first time in a long time I have burst out in laughter simply out of seeing sheer stupidity on the number one spot. How is that website allowed to function???

“And melee classes are just stronger in this game” “You definitely need something else for your fortress knights” Wow, what a great start 😅

"If you have Sylvain get this weapon as quickly as possible, if not then it is still good on other fighters." *How the hell do you get Lance of Ruin without Sylvain*

Freikugel, only weapon Hilda ever needs, until she breaks it because of its shockingly low durability.

9:42 Actually you’re slightly wrong here, the Viskam is the Agarthan siege weapon, but it’s also the name of an unused sword too. The only way to get it is by hacking the game, or purchasing it from someone who hacked there game on the online store. It works like the Agarthan Viskam but it’s a sword player units can use with range. I don’t know if this makes this guide more or less stupid, eigher they’re recommending an enemy only weapon, or a weapon that can only be hacked in. At least this confirms that they just skimmed a wiki because that’s the only way you’d know about the Viskam

Annette when she finally gets to C rank in Faith : *oh boy here I go killing again*

Random guy on the FE subreddit: Shares a link to a 3 houses "guide" Mekkah: This is the worst guide I've ever seen

I heard from my uncle (That works at Nintendo ;) that Phoenix mode was originally name "Game journalist mode"

Yes, Recover is an “amazing” weapon you could probably use it to solo entire chapters with it.

I like how the person who wrote the article bashed training weapons on account of their low might when most of my units were one-rounding most late-game enemies with training weapons in my first run of the game. But none of that even came close to when I had Rhea and Jeralt absolutely destroy the last few chapters with their incredible use of recover.

I can't believe they forgot about the Pugi! Best Sword weapon in the game! Too bad it has 20 durability

The guide has a point, just imagine how horrible would be to miss with healing spell.

I really had to take a second to recover from that ending. Just kidding, if I did that then i'd die in one hit to that weapon of the gods

"With the low weight you can and should use anothe weapon as a backup." It's easy to miss, but thise guys seems to think that weapon weight affects you even if you aren't equipping the weapon. Also, these guys give you tips on what to do if you have Aymr but not Edelgard.

Don't use training weapons at all. Let's all get ORKO on Maddening by chapter 1 guys

Dang, I've been using recover wrong this whole time. I'll definitely be picking up a Viskam in my Maddening Mode playthrough.

Game Journalist: "Hmmm, the name of this thing is recover. It's clearly a weapon"

Wait, where is the Devil Axe on this list?

Ignoring this dumpster fire of an article, I un-ironically found iron+ weapons to be the most useful due to their low weight, high durability, reasonable damage, and naturally higher avoid. Having the ability to consistently double and occasionally dodge is really powerful.

Hold on, I think I can actually one-hit-KO every enemy with Recover and just repair it with the awesome Hammerne tome which has a surprising 50 might and 100 hit. Faith weapons sure are broken in this game.

Here we go again... - Marty (Thracia 776)

I laughed so hard at that last entry more than I should've. You can really tell that they didn't actually play the game, just looked at stats.

12:56 “if you have Sylvain get this weapon as quickly as possible, if you don’t it’s not a bad choice for the other fighters” You can’t even get the lance of ruin if you don’t have Sylvain lmao

5:46 Ah I see Mekkah got a young alt for the 30th anniversary as well.

I fear no man. But referring to a non-physical, healing magic spell, as a book that deals 30 damage for 100 hit rate... It scares me.

The axe of Ukonvasara is legitimately one of the best weapons in the game. Armor effectiveness, huge might, renewal effect, and 20 crit. You get it right after the time skip, so the availability isn't bad, either.

13:00 I think what makes the Lance of Ruin good is that it has the best availability of the Hero's Relic. You can get it as early as the end of chapter 5 and it should be your most powerful weapon at that point.

8:55 wait a second is this implying that this guy thinks the TOTAL weight of the weapons you carry, and not the equipped one, is important?

"the only bow on this list is Failnaught" Welp. They already failed. I love Failnaught, but Inexhaustible is so much better.

15:14 - I could feel Mekkah's pain and sorrow seeping out of the screen

This guide does make Mekkah laugh I mean that's quite an achievement.

I assumed number 1 was gonna be fists, as they have infinite durability. I could never have foreseen how wrong I'd be

You'll definitely need some recovering after being hit with that 30 might healing spell Mekkah

"You should not be using training axes". Yeah, why in the world would I want to have a light-weight, accurate weapon to deal with hard to hit enemies or set up kills for other units...

10:25 The Viskam can be obtained through hacking and it is coded as a sword. It can also be bought from online travelers who have hacked it, for 1G. Regardless, the fact that this "guide" didn't bother to check what Viskam actually is and still included it on the list is still hilarious.

I heard Zero REALLY likes "The Gamer"...

Recover is the best weapon eh. Does that mean Lorenz gets to be top tier now?

Shitty list, forged training sword isnt there. Edit: holy shit this guy absolutely did not play the game

Past Blazingknight: Dancer is The Absolute Worst Class. 2019 The Gamer: Hold My Recover

EVEN WITHOUT PLAYING THE GAME HOW DID THIS FAIL THAT HARD

All of the people saying Lorenz is bad... checkmate, he has the best weapon in the game

Mekkah: "The Gamer site ..... " Me: "Let me grab pop-corn first. This will be interesting." .. . .... *20 minutes later* Me: "I am still laughing after the top spot of this ranking. Move along."

Anytime a new weapon gets brought up, we're just gonna call it the WEAPON OF THE GODS

Those outdated gamefaqs guides at least have a kind of misguided honesty to them(and are likely written by teenage/college age amateurs.) This? There can be no way he's actually played the game to not put recover on top of the list. Among other things, such as missing the *actual* exclusive arts all the relics/crests unlock. And it's a paid professional. Other then the lance of ruin being decent I think I struggle seeing anything factual at all. At least most questionable material has some logic to dissect, and this has none of that.

After Viskam I thought it couldn’t get worse. I was wrong.

I just forced my self to believe that all the "Gaming" sites are part of a comedy group

"the failnaught is the only good bow in the game" well then I guess rip the inexhaustible and brave bows...and killer bows....and silver bows...and magic bows....and mini bows which make maddening survivable...bro, do you even close counter? Ah yes, the death knight and his iconic crest of Dominic, a perfect fit for the crusher "the only sword on this list is the viskan"...never even heard of it well then, I guess rip killing edges, wo daos, rapiers, the sword of moralta, sword of zoltan, the blutgang, levin swords and...am I missing something....oh right, THE FREAKIN SWORD OF THE CREATOR THAT CAN AUTO REGENERATE! Well, I guess that means they're all useless now, might as well throw them all away I ind it funny that the article phrases it like if you don't have Sylvain, just find another user for the lance of ruin...when you can't even acquire the damn thing without him in the first place. You just give it to Rhea to add it to her collection of some other shit, and that's the end of that, you'll never see it again unless you recruit Sylvain later and do his paralogue welp, you heard the article folks: the freikugel is the ONLY axe to give to Hilda. No hand axes, short axes, tomahawks, killer axes, hammer, and everything else in between. Just THROW all of that garbage away, as it only wastes convoy space, and we all know how fast 400 inventory slots fill man, I can't even BEGIN to count the number of times Rhea and Jeralt equipped with Aymr saved my ass....because that NEVER HAPPENED! God, who wrote this "article"? No.1......*BRUH* So yeah, all in all....great article, 10/10, would recommend it 3 out 4 houses, it "amazes" me. Remember, heroes relics activate crest effects on combat arts and fortress knights are the go to unit ......God, this is worse than a fandom article

Me : Never played 3 houses The Gamer : The best weapon in the game is the book Recover *Doubt*

lance of ruin: "get this weapon as quickly as possible" BRO YOU GET IT IN CHAPTER 6 OR 7 (forgot which exactly)

I haven't seen it, but the combo killer Lance+ and swift strikes = pwnage incarnate

Mekkah laughed so hard he just had to end the video without saying anything

Man this guide is so helpful. I cant wait to run Amyr on Rhea and put recover on all my holy knights

this is how I look like talking about 3H while never even looking at Switch irl

I can’t believe recovery magic is the best attacking weapon in the game! I really have been playing 3H wrong this whole time.

They already lost me at "The only bow on this list"

I didn't know that there were many "Fire Emblems" in "Fire Emblems: Three Houses" I expected the Thysus to be there and the eternal debate of leaving it on Lysithea or Lorenz, and I hope the wee Dingloid who wrote this misread Recover with Abraxas

The gamer. Yep they've probably never played a game in their life and just steal info from youtubers.

“only axe I should give hilda” and what else before freikugel? recover??

4:08 "#9 The Crusher and we see the Death Knight, you know the most iconic user of the Crusher." lol The sass!

13:00 So he assumes you can get the Lance of Ruin WITHOUT having Sylvain? The same with Edelgard, how does he think you can get Amyr without Edelgard? Oh right, I forgot he never played the game before.

Oh no. Here we go again.

This can't be that b- >Recover No1 My guess is they probably used Serenes forest to just look at the stats and wrote this in like 10 minutes.

I remember seeing an article when I was first playing three houses about the best and worst hero's relics I saw thunderbrand near the bottom and immediately clicked off Seriously how could you possibly say "brave weapon but stronger" is bad? Edit: watched the video all the way through, what the actual fuck

I like how they ding the Failnaught for durability but it's the same with any other hero's relic.

Little did he know the Viskam would not only become obtainable but also one of the best in the game

i am genuinely confused.. wtf

Boy I sure do hate having to repair my spells when they break in 3H...

Being a fan of Zero’s channel, I was very excited when I heard ‘The Gamer’

I laughed so hard at the last entry I started appreciate pitfall wiki.

I stopped at the 'Fortress Knights.'

Number 1: "Recover" *Mekkah machine broke*

You didn't even get into how the line "With the low weight, you can and should carry another weapon as a backup" implies that they think there's some sort of carry-weight system in the game, like heavier weapons either take up more space or slow you down when you aren't using them.

The recover thing reminds me of how you can use medicinal herbs in Dragon Quest 3 to deal a random amount of damage to the final boss and in speedruns they manipulate the RNG so they can deal max damage every time.