Mentally torture me (1,2,3) DESTROY MY HAPPINESS (1,2,3) Spend my money 123 Ruin my friendship 123 Cheat on me Steal my cat Lie to me 1,2,3 anything and everything evil and hurtful can be used to describe a narrassist. I have a question and could use so advise or suggestions please? My ex went to New supply and keeps coming back to me. He cheated on her day 1. Do I tell her? She has no clue what or who he is. Ive been w him off n on for 22 yrs. I know his family. She's never met his mom or dad. Yet he shacks up w her because I left him. Then we got back together then he left me. Do I mail her proof of things she will know im not lying about or making shit up with a little letter telling her what he really is, what he says about her. I have all his middle of the night I miss you pics so she can't deny her furniture. If nothing else she will be forced to soul search when she sees our text conversation how he is using her until I take him back, he'll never love her. He's only loved me for 20 years and she doesn't smell like me and he's craving me, pics of him crying that he can't live w out me. I truly think I should and not out of spite. No one deserves his kind of torture.
It is definitely NOT because they actually love you….they miss what you provided for them - pls don’t take the bait. Learn, heal and move on. No Contact, therapy and self love!
@@gigicooper1759 I didnt take the bait. It's about "mind over matter" thinking. Im not going to even invite the negative words my xnarc said to me about who i was. Id rather feel what a "prize" he lost. And he knows it.
They try to replace you but when the new/old supply ends they try to get their exes back…whoever agrees to take them back is the loser of the next round
Yup 😂 exactly what's happening for me now. He had a girlfriend after I broke up with him and after few more months he starts hoovering me back online. Ain't gonna happen dude lmao
My narcissist wanted me back because 1. He wanted me to drop the charges 2. He was comfortable 3. Free labor 4. A second mom 5. Free housing 6. Free food 7. A personal chef 8. Someone to abuse 9. To suck energy from 10. I was the only person in the entire universe to tolerate his BS and stupidity
He can miss me with all of his BS ! Why would anyone want to go back to the very person that broke you . After 30 years , I finally filed for a legal seperation/ divorce & our court day is in August of 2024. 🙏🏽🙌🏽
Same here, 30 yrs 🤦🏽♀️ I feel like I was sooooo freaking naive. 14 yr age diff, I was 18 when we started dating . My ex was a covert narc. I genuinely loved him, I saw all the red flags but that man refused to leave. I moved to another state 9 months ago to get further away. To keep from kicking myself, i think of the good times. And binge watch TeaonNPD to remind me of all the reason I left.
The toxic person want you back for all the bad reasons 1- they miss the power/control 2- they want to hurt you as payback 3- they think you shouldn't leave them 4- you should stay the dumb naive victim So you choose how you want to be treated
Know the feeling; I'm glad the punk left!! He hated my strength! Everytime he sees me he stares! I've lost considerable weight and the glow up is ON!!! I DON'T WANT HIM CLOSE ENOUGH TO KISS MY GRITS!!!! 😂😂😂😂
I have tolerated his abuse for 6 years and now I miss him like crazy. It’s like my life is over and it’s just him. What am I supposed to do, we did everything together. Now I’m alone and wondering what I did wrong. He loved me in the morning then broke it off again that night. Help
@TraceyBettencourt-it9th If you'll accept sympathy from a stranger, you have mine. It's not easy, and I assume this is still recent, and raw. The one thing I CAN say is that REMEMBERING the nonsense you suffered at least ( eventually! ) puts things in a certain perspective when those moments ( or days ) of that feeling come ( which they indubitably will ). Absence is often not easy to handle in the physical sense; perhaps yours was ALSO absent in many other ways when the thing was happening?😐🙂
@@imbalancedstatus8824 thank you🥹I lost it again last night.. women calling via FB msg.. I have to find a way to let go and be free. I’m truly losing my mind😭
He must’ve run out of money already and wants me back so that he can steal money from me to pay his bills and pretend to be financially stable grownup 🙄 pathetic
It has been a year for me being no contact whatsoever after leaving my ex narc, changed my number, moved over night and deleted all my social media and changed my routine on anything he might’ve knew and cut off flying monkeys 🥳🥳🥳🥳 it feels so good my goodness 🙏🏼
@@azashukura… I wish I actually could get up and leave. I feel like it would be so much easier to let go. But I have to agree, the fact we have to change our entire life to get away from the abuse and stay safe is sickening. There really needs to be laws to stop them .. really there does😢
I wish I had known this 15 years ago. I was divorcing my husband but allowed him to love bomb me, not knowing anything about narcissistic people. I rescinded the divorce papers and gave up everything that had me happy after living apart in another state for 8 years. I thought, “finally he is listening to me.” Moved and went back to him in the other state and it has been a living hell emotionally, physically, mentally and spiritually. 😢
Their goal is to continue to have control of your every thought and every action. If they can succeed in seeing you unhappy for ANY reason it would be their greatest joy!
My STBX tried that control ish! I told him that marriage is a relationship not a dictatorship! I'm glad the mf left!!! They hate people with inner strength and integrity!
Act as though they are invisible! My STBX had the nerve to speak to me ! I kept walking! I don't give that mf a centimeter of supply!!! The glow up is gonna kick his azz though! 😂😂😂😂
They either want to continue to devalue u or idolise u. The cycle always happens with idolise devalue discard and they will do it but it doesn’t have to mean discard physically. It is an emotional discard and a person can feel that especially someone who is sensitive
He’s so angry with is Mother, he told me I reminded him of her, once I began to think about the pain that was inflicted by her, the trust, childhood trauma, it scared the mess out of me.
Hoovered me with an 'accidental' whatsapp to then just suddenly go silent on me. Truly toxic. No comijg towards me with integrity and offering a sincere apology for past behaviours, nothing. No closure , when I had wished him the best. Silent treatment thinking I will chase. Thanks to these videos I won't be.
Mine did that, too. He 'accidentally' sent a text about moving things. I had to leave most of my belongings behind. Oops, he meant to send the text to a friend. 🙄 He felt the need to include a selfie, but I never want to see his face again.
@@Orquet-qj2nf a selfie 🤣 I believe my ex narc is holding onto my belongings too so I have just blocked him and let that stuff go. May I ask how that happened w you?
Thank you so much for sharing your knowledge and experience. It took me a long time to finally realize that it wasn’t me, that there wasn’t anything wrong with me and your videos have been a part of that process for sure. I spent 15 years in a relationship with a narcissist, and it took almost 22 years before I finally fully got out from underneath his thumb. Did a real number on my already not so great self-esteem, but hearing from you has helped me to really solidify that it never was me. There was not a damn thing wrong with me. He was the problem. And there is nothing I ever could’ve done to fix him.
So true! He misses my cooking and the s-x, but he has to keep all the sidekicks. So he can eat out and wash his own dishes while the sidekicks fall flat.
The way his family encourages/encouraged this behavior was so heartbreaking. Thank yall for speaking up. Thank God for this video. I gotta trust I will rebuild over time
Everything you’re saying is so true. The person I was with always tried to control more and do bad things they have never done before. Their jealousy really comes out too.
I applaud you for being so honest and giving us who have no idea how to handle a narcissist the fighting chance to really understand them and how to love them without the emotional draining energy trauma. Drama. So thank you.
He’d always complain about how his ex wife would complain about him and eventually I started understanding where she was coming from. Then for some reason he brought over the custody papers where he was paying only $200 a month to her for 2 kids…and I pretty much lost all respect for him.
New supply fails Money Sex Mess with your head Try to keep you stuck so you don’t move forward The guilt might get to them Come back to finish your ass off Plus many many more. Lesson learned
You’re more than a Queen. Not that a Queen is limiting because that’s the highest highness of a most intelligent courageous beauty amongst women. You do embody a perfect emanating expression of a Queen. The icing on the cake is your Divine limitlessness that is in tune with her being. You’re evolution. Thank you for sharing and expressing. I sense your passion for yourself and your passion for standing for justice of your worth. I’m grateful for the love you have for yourself. You’re badass.
This recently happened and I foolishly entertained it as a friendship. Then they went left field on me after I made what I thought was a joke about our past relationship that they abruptly ended out of nowhere. I’ve been ghosted since then and I now see it for what it was. I provided a comfort of sorts. 🤷🏾♂️
He’s taking out vengeance on my youngest daughter. She made a hasty decision and damaged his property. He’s filed a police report against her. He now wants us to pay for his window. I’m furious. Trying to contain my anger. My kids were persistent in their efforts to protect me and get me away from him.
My narcissistic player expects me to chase him. Not happening, I know he will treat me even worse. Because I went no contact, which means to him, losing the power control over me. Not in this life time will I give him that chance! Thank you Lee. 🙏😎
She told her friend “ i do not if i can’t find anyone who can love me like he does to me “. She wrote something to herself in a note : “ you have started and you have to end it “ i knew she planned already . One day she told “ i know your life would be much better without me, but i do not know about myself “. “You do not know how hard i try to act normal sometimes “. I ghosted her first . I still feel bad for her , she is young and i fear for her future .
The supply that I gave him. A roof, food, listening ear, to have me be submissive but his idea of submissive is total control. Plus money. To name a few. He is bored with the current supply and situationship.
Mine says he's afraid of me. Because I stopped speaking to him. I had told him years prior that when he's angry, I get scared. He tried to throw my words back at me and do the DARVO thing and claim victimhood status.
So does my STBX husband! I know he's going pillar to post! Ask me if I give a filth flaren filth! If not that he's with an uneducated female! That's what he likes! I don't fit the bill! 😂😂😂
This is true with all narcissists, on all relationship levels….friends, significant others, associates, family members too! NOT JUST THE ONE LEVEL WHICH IS ALWAYS COVERED. Idk how & why I got so BLESSED to be surrounded by the toxicity of blatant narcissism. lol. SMH. I am locked in on keeping my distance & being more cautious, so I won’t continue these tiring, negative patterns.
Your courage to share these videos is amazing! Sending love and respect to your wife - she's the rock in your healing journey. Your son is lucky to have both of you. I noticed you seemed a bit nervous in the video, but your authenticity shines through. It's clear you're speaking from your own experience with this condition, and that's something I really admire. I hope more people struggling with narcissism can find the strength to grow and find their true selves. I recently got out of a 4-year relationship I couldn't escape from, and it ended up affecting my new relationship because of the toxicity. It's been tough dealing with the emotional abuse, but I'm working on healing. I'm hopeful that his new partner can break free too. Your insights mean a lot to me. Thanks, Lee, for being a positive force in this world. Sending you lots of love and support.
My ex wanted/got his first wife back, after she left him, so that he could divorce her i.e. so she didn't have one-upmanship over him = competition and revenge.
My ex is unfortunately a 50/50 coparent and she sends messages on appClose all the time about how 'you'll never be rid of me' and hateful messages. I ignore it unless it's an actual question about the kids and then she gets angry that I'm not responding.
2/1/2 year failed relationship and kept taking her back after all her lies. Burned me bad and we didn’t speak for close to two years. Recently pops back up and finds out she moved from across the country and right into my neighborhood. Foolishly entertained her for six weeks before it failed miserably again. After love bombing the crap out of me and the day before we were finally going to therapy, caught her with a man at her house. Which she had the nerve to tell me “was the final straw for her”. The person was her ex between us, I’m not even sure who was the side piece this time, me or him. This new supply comes from money, maybe that’ll keep her away this time because that’s all she cares about
@@devbrooks9988 my xnarc lives in my neighbourhood also. I will never get back with him, but having to see him around everyday....its like a bee in my bonnet. Im being bullied by his x main supply also. Stay strong !!
Money won’t keep her away.. They want US to sit there waiting for them .. They carry on, while we try to pick ourselves up 😢😢😢they are the cruelest most sickening humans on this earth😢😢😢😢
@@deehyatt5173 unfortunately my experience as well. Always minimizing, no real apologies, and never real closure. But that closure will have to be letting their actions speak for them
For these reasons I cancelled the wedding, lost money & moved on. Little by little you can rebuild your life and get back on your feet… MENTALLY! Please seek counseling work on yourself.
This hit home! I had left him been gone for a couple of months he kept trying to get me back. Went so far as to try to demand I cancel my vacation to see my daughter and grandson unless he could go too or I would have to take same amount of time off work when I got back to spend with him. But always said he wasn’t trying to control me. I almost went back until he made those demands
Mine just came at me out of nowhere because he has not had his feed. He also tried to use the dog against me. The Six hours of texts and drama, that I refused to engage in was crazy. He threatened my well-being multiple times, including in the phone in his bank. His cockiness scares me. I have a tow week reprieve, but I am trying to stay one step ahead.
Take those texts to the court and get a no contact order against him immediately! Take to the police station as well and see if you can file harassment charges against him too
We never even met, he got mad at me, a fan via SM, and re-arranged the Universe to get to me, me thinking a connection, no! Just wanted to hurt me, I seemingly discarded him, or so he thought, I did not, knows who I am, doesn't respond or DM me, just wants to secret message, draw me in, then hurt, me (as I hurt him), as he' s weak. Oddly, but trying to hurt me, he shows his own vulnerability, which is just what I had exposed that made him, wish to hurt me. Not a good strategy.
#1. Because the arrogant coocoola has temporarily run out of supply and; or… #2. You’re now showing absolutely no interest in them and; or… #3. Out of Convenience!!!
Can a narcissist be positively influenced by an empathetic person in a genuine way? Like does your wife’s softness genuinely influence you/ inspire you to want to be better?
This is a losing battle. You can’t love enough for two ppl. They are who they are. Like you are who you are. Are they going to influence you to be sadistic? To be a manipulator?
Not possible. A covert will even use this to Hurt you further, to Play you. They don't Love, they hate the Person that they are in a relationship with. They hate that they are dependent on supply from people and hate them for IT. So much hate and rage in them. The covert will Mask this, but get away AS soon AS you can.
After 3 months, my ex narcissist emailed me 😅. He was blocked everywhere else. And of course, he was apologizing, and long story short, I rejected him! And it felt soooo good being able to get some things off my chest and to reject him! @Lee, how do you think he is feeling or thinking? Mind you, this is the first and last time we have broken up. And I'm very serious when I say last. I feel good and fine without him. I refuse to give him another chance to betray me again, and it be even worse.
THIS WHAT MY NARCISSIST BOYFRIEND DID, HE CHEATED ON ME AND I CHEATED BACK, AND HE KNOWS ABOUT THE CHEATING, HE CAME BACK AND BEHAVING AS IF IT'S ALL GOOD. AND WHEN I GAVE HIM BACK THAT CHANCE, HE JUST WALK OUT ON ME AND IN 3DAYS HE'S BACK WITH HIS EX! THAT HURT ME THE CORE! 😢
He discarded me because he doesn’t want a future with me after two and a half years. He said he was dissatisfied in the relationship out of the blue. He won’t be back.
I have a question. Why does he like to say I was shitty too and there were a lot of things I needed to change as well? When I wasn’t lying or cheating on him? The “shitty” thing I was supposedly doing was accusing him of cheating and lying when he wasn’t, even though I could list several examples of the lies he told and examples of emotional affairs and cheating behaviors. I never could fully prove it. I also would ask if something was going on, or ask if he was cheating. I never outright accused him of anything. He’s told everyone that I’m the narcissist and used him for money and did evil things to him. He lived in my house rent free for 8 months. Then, only paid less that half the bills when I pushed him to pay rent. He insisted on going on a vacation with the kids and I after I took him back the first time. I told him he’d have to help pay for it if he was going, otherwise I’d pay for it and just take the kids. He insisted on it. Then later said he took out a loan to go and I took advantage of his money, when I paid for half of it! He told ppl I never said thank you, which is wrong. I always told him thank you. Then he denied that he ever lived at my house rent free. Ppl believe him and actually hate me for breaking up with him a second time after I found out he was hiding our relationship status on FB and still liking other women’s photos when we talked about it numerous times and he promised to change his online behavior. He said I was a hypocrite because I’d like a mutual friends photos, I was only liking memes and photos of his kids. Then he said I didn’t set a relationship status on my second Facebook account which is an author/ business account. Which I would have been happy to do but it didn’t occur to me because it’s not an account where ppl know me in real life. It’s a persona. Sometimes I wonder if I really am a shitty person. Sorry to rant but I’m still confused about all of it.
