Toxic relationships | 911 (Kdramas) Ⓣ 🅒 

The note you are about to read is very long, but please read it all, this is very important. I will start with some technical points: + I might delete the comments that I judge too extreme and serious. I don't have the patience to debate with people who didn't even take the time to read this note or are only here to leave bad comments. 1- All the drama names are in the description (as well as the software, music and coloring) 2 - You can turn on the subtitles so you can read the notes I've added throughout the video's progress. They are meant to explain the evolution of the video so that you can understand why each step is important. 3- There are indeed stages in the video, we go from simple jealousy that is shown as cute, to violence on objects (phones etc) to the victimization of the assailant, to the blaming on the victim before getting to the physical violence. 4- The video is short, it could have been a minute longer. But as it is the first time I deal with this subject I wanted to remain synthetic. Maybe if you are interested in the subject I will make a longer one. 5- The video shows the man as the assailant and the woman as the victim. This is a personal choice. I could have added female assailants and male victims since that happens too. But since I judged that in terms of statistics and the content I had in hand, the woman was more often the victim, I made this choice. But in the future, I could totally do a video that deals with the other case. 6- Here is a link to a video that helped me a lot and that is much more explanatory than mine, so don't hesitate to watch it : ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-v3mFWU352L4.html 7 - What I wanted to show is: jealousy and possessiveness is not cute, it can be an excuse for manipulation and control. The non-respect of consent and violence is never justified. Insults, pressure, humiliation, blame, is violence. And mental violence can lead to physical violence. 8 - On the entire video, there is only a few shows where the toxic relationship is explicit (It’s okay to not be okay and Age of youth for example). For the rest, these are all couples and ships that are portrayed as normal and romantic. I also recommend you to read the book "Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men" by Lundy Bancroft. Here are some quotes : "Abusiveness can be thought of as a recipe that involves a consistent set of ingredients: control, entitlement, disrespect, excuses, and justifications (including victim blaming)-elements that are always present, often accompanied by physical intimidation or violence." " Has he ever trapped you in a room and not let you out? Has he ever raised a fist as if he were going to hit you? Has he ever thrown an object that hit you or nearly did? Has he ever held you down or grabbed you to restrain you? Has he ever shoved, poked, or grabbed you? Has he ever threatened to hurt you? If the answer to any of these questions is yes, then we can stop wondering whether he’ll ever be violent; he already has been. " " One of the obstacles to recognizing chronic mistreatment in relationships is that most abusive men simply don’t seem like abusers. They have many good qualities, including times of kindness, warmth, and humor, especially in the early period of a relationship. An abuser’s friends may think the world of him. He may have a successful work life and have no problems with drugs or alcohol. He may simply not fit anyone’s image of a cruel or intimidating person. So when a woman feels her relationship spinning out of control, it is unlikely to occur to her that her partner is an abuser." " In reality, abuse springs from a man’s early cultural training, his key male role models, and his peer influences. In other words, abuse is a problem of values, not of psychology. " First, why am I so radical about jealousy? Because I consider that there is nothing good in it. As the quote at the end of the video says, I consider jealousy to be more of a self-esteem issue than a love issue. And I speak as someone who is jealous in love and friendship. It's an emotion that you can' t control and that comes from the fear of being abandoned because you lack self-confidence. But for me, one person's jealousy should never hurt another person. Just because you don't have self-confidence doesn't mean you should blame the other person. Anger is a mixture of sadness and frustration. We are angry when something hurts us and we deny it or refuse it, so we turn it into anger. The danger of not knowing your emotions and what they mean, as with jealousy and anger, is that you risk hurting others and yourself. The problem with jealousy is that, because of your lack of self-confidence, you feel threatened and weakened, but you deny this pain and turn it into anger. Except that anger is dangerous, especially when we don't understand it and we blame the other person. The mistake is to blame the other person when you are the problem. This is what can happen in a toxic relationship, this is what can happen any time. - About not respecting consent, I could make an entire video of a kiss given without the person's consent. Please, I don't want to hear "she didn't say no" "she didn't stop it" "she agreed afterwards". I think these kinds of thoughts are very grave and I could write a 20-page essay on how bad it is, but that's not what this video is about. But I'll surely do that if I make a video with BL because I consider the lack of consent very serious in it. Then, why do I insist on the progression of the video? Because in a toxic relationship you don't jump from nothing to everything, from a 'normal' relationship to a toxic relationship. The transition is gradual. That's why some of the extracts I've included may seem ridiculous to you, you may think "she's exaggerating, there's nothing toxic about it". But, if a passage is in this video, it means that it contains something dangerous, even if it is not yet directly physical violence. For example, grabbing women by the arm and pulling them without asking their opinion is an act of disrespect of consent and a form of domination. Forcing someone to stop seeing someone out of jealousy is a form of manipulation. I could go on and on like this. Instead, I'll be honest with you even though I'm a little scared of it: I was in a relationship like this for a year and a half. I was 16 at the time, he was funny, handsome, caring. When he started to forbid me things out of jealousy, I didn't question it. When he broke things and cried and said he was afraid of losing me, I told myself it was because he loved me. That's why this subject is sensitive and important to me, that's why I might be radical if you come and tell me that jealousy is not toxic. That's why the scenes I see in kdramas drive me crazy. This normalization of domination, jealousy, control, mental violence, blackmail, physical violence is very dangerous. The jealousy crises turned into a joke, the scenes of non-respect of the consent turned into romantic scenes with slow motion and a nice music in the background. It is dangerous, it is not nothing, it is not an exaggeration to say that it is serious. There are people who are likely to find themselves in situations like this and who may never realize it "because it's normal" "because it's not his fault". You don't change someone like that, it's not your job. Someone who can't express their emotions and turns them into anger is a dangerous person. A man who turns his frustration, fear and suffering into anger and violence is a dangerous person. I beg you, don't make the same mistake I did, trying to convince yourself that his actions are justified, that it's not his fault, that he had a hard life, or that you had it coming, that it's your fault. It's not your fault. I insist, it's not your fault. No matter what he makes you believe, no matter what he puts in your head, it is not your fault. Overall, I've been talking about the case of a narcissistic pervert, but be aware that the line between narcissistic pervert and toxic masculinity can be very thin. But remember this: jealousy and possessiveness is not cute, it can be an excuse for manipulation and control. The non-respect of consent and violence is never justified. Insults, pressure, humiliation, blame, is violence. And moral violence can lead to physical violence. Hope you’ve liked the video anyway. Don’t hesitate to share the link! Thanks for reading all this and for watching. _______________________________________________________ Please support my work here : ko-fi.com/marietb - or here : www.paypal.com/pools/c/8r78OHJRRR

those dramas are literally normalizing women being treated as an object that men can control, harass and manipulate out of jealousy and anger.

You did an amazing job portraying a lot of the toxic and problematic things that are perpetuated in a lot of dramas. I always hated that Geum Jandi ended up with him in Boys Over Flowers because he was so abusive towards her. I'm glad it's something people are talking about and addressing more now.

I like that you shed some light on this topic. I also felt that some scenes in kdrama tend to be perceived as something cute while I was disgusted of the way the character was behaving. And then seeing other fans gush over the interaction made me doubt myself whether I was too sensitive. One particular thing I’ve always hated was when the male lead says ‘she is mine’. Like no, she isn’t yours, she isn’t anyone’s possession. She’s a person so don’t treat her as an object

finally people can start to se sunoh in a new light i couldn’t stan his cliché bad boy rich model with parent issues and thinks that he’s the only person in the world

Extraordinary you actually did a really good job in portraying how toxic relationships are portrayed in other kdrama and web-toons. The plot literally points out how stupid some kdramas really are. I really enjoyed this drama because Dan Oh just gave a fat metaphorical middle finger to Bae Kyun's atrocities after the stages were over.

Grabbing a girl from her wrist is violence. It's not manly things. Hurting anyone out of love isn't love. And not jealousy. No privacy, no secrets isn't a trust matter. . It's a privacy that everyone has the right to have and act freely. Forcing kiss isn't a kiss out if love. It's FORCING. Thank you for your content. I loved it!

I'm SO GLAD to see Baekkyung being labeled as the abusive, violent, gaslighting fiancé that he is! It was so maddening to watch 'Extraordinary You' in real time and to see all the comments excusing and even romanticizing his behavior, actually blaming Danoh for "abandoning" him, painting him as the victim when it was made abundantly clear that he was still as abusive even outside the manhwa scenes wherein he's under the author's control. Lee Jaewook is cute and lovable, but his character in this drama was most certainly not!

Thank god someone finally made a video about True beauty in toxic relationship. I always saw how toxic Suho was being and please he was so much better in Webtoon. They ruined his character in the show.

We deserve more shows which show consent, swag and non toxicity between lovers

SUCH AN EMOTIONALLY LOADED VIDEO I GOT CHILLS FROM EVERY MOVE THE CHARACTERS MADE GREAT WORK THANK YOU FOR SPREADING AWARENESS

the love story in age of youth is so scary. It's an underrated drama, but everyone should watch it. The scar and trauma that her boyfriend leaves and how she overcomes it in the second season...

I have to say I'm VEY scared because of how many of these were made in the last 6-5 years... I used to think it was only 2010 and before dramas that had this kind of thing but i was SUPER wrong and I hope producers and screenwriters really start reflecting on the problems they are creating, specially within young audiences, when they normalize and romanticize situations like these

I'm really liking how some editors are making video on this topic or have talked/made a serious video on toxic relationships because true this is not cute at all this shouldn't be normalize in real life! Thanks for giving this much time on this topic and the pinned comment is necessarily important each point is absolutely correct 💯👏👏

playful kiss has toxicity and manipulation written ALL over it

This is why I liked the portrayal of Dan Oh's character in Extraordinary You a lot. I know that there is this cliche in stories where you fall in love with someone who bullied you and abused you for a long time. This concept was very weird to me. In the drama we can see that the writer (of the webtoon) was pushing this concept, whereas Dan Oh in reality couldn't like Baek Kyung at all as he was always rude to her. Her character showed the absurdity in the idea of falling for someone who has always treated you horribly. I really don't get it why some people got second lead syndrome over his character 🤐 He is not supposed to be a likable character imo. And of course I am only talking about the character, not the actor.

1:02 - this really hurts hard when your own boyfriend says you to quit your job cause of his jealousy..

God I hated heirs so much because of the male lead. He was so abusive and everyone i’ve talked to about that drama all love it and him? It blows my mind. Thankyou for making this.

i’m so happy you put sun oh in there. i never understood why people wanted her to end up with him. i mean, yeah he didn’t get the closure he deserved but that gives him no right to invade on her and claim that she likes him all the time. sun oh and jojo’s relationship was very much a fantasy on both of their parts. they were liking ideas they had of each other rather than getting to know each other. hye yeong on the other hand tried to get to know her and treated her as an active participant in the relationship. that’s what makes a healthy relationship. also side note, i love how extra-ordinary you made fun of the boys of flowers trope. she doesn’t end up with baek kyung because she knows it’s an unhealthy relationship.

The video you recommend actually showed up in my recommended a few weeks ago and it made me realize why certain scenes made me feel uneasy or angry. I hope many people will watch your video as well.

Im so glad we’re starting to move on from the toxic couples because they aren’t in any way healthy. As much as I love and feel for kyung he really really needs therapy and wasn’t the one for Dan on which is why I think people should stop romanticizing their relationship and the abuse signs in dramas .

SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK people tend to overlook this whole amount of toxicity in kdramas and that not fine at all

Sadly out of all these dramas Age of Youth is the only one that criticise this behavior

Cheese in the trap creeps me out. everyone was so aggressive and toxic. they acted so creepy. They did amazing acting but the drama was just violent and toxic. fl got a stalker, a creepy bf, a fake friend who wanted to be like her, bf's adopted sister who was after her

As a kdrama fan who always put off the toxicity seen in most scenes and how i convinced myself saying "its just a show" , i am utterly ashamed of myself for disregarding the fact that there are many people here, including myself, who romanticized most couples in this video. I have had people point out its toxicity and how i poorly acknowledged it, but that is no excuse. I am disappointed on how such relationships are portrayed and wish more people will be more aware of such situations like i am now. Thank u for addressing this and opening the eyes of many! I will most definitely share it

"There is more self-love in jeoulousy than love " OMG that made me think so deep 😭 thanks for ur amazing video, topics like this should never be ignored it's a shame that many ppl normalize it ..

i’m so happy this is being brought to light especially in the popular drama true beauty i feel like they didn’t communicate and he was always physically dragging her

Hated the love alarm second lead and suho in true beauty it was toxic I hate that everyone loved them, normalised it and were thinking of only the main female ending up with them. But they don't consider how toxic it is 😟

Great initiative!! IT'S NOT COOL TO KISS YOUR GIRLFRIEND WITHOUT HER CONSENT. Kdramas have always tend to fantazise 'the bad boy' concept into our heads but in reality he's being a jerk. I hope people get this.

Keeping it real was the best thing you did in this work. One person cant change the entire industry but if we raise awareness on the issue...verbal, written, fiction...some people can be saved from being harrassed

Thank you so much for this video. When I first came to know about what exactly toxic relationships are and how certain stuff like non consent kisses are not cute, I was upset and angered that many people did not think of it as something that had to be addressed or something problematic. Thank you once again!

It's sad how in most dramas especially the old one's, the victim and abuser end up together just because they are ml and fl.

i have to add that ju dantea was in one of my nightmares because of his cruelty towards his wife and daughter

this video is so necessary, I've saw people talking about the abusive behavior in kdramas but they never talked about the popular romantic cliches ones (like love alarm, extraordinary you, uncontrollably fond, etc) the fact that you put them in this video makes it even better because this shouldn't be normalized and romantized the way it is THANK YOU FOR THIS!!!

It is a masterpiece. In dramas it may see cute but in real life it has an adverse effect on people. Relationships like this are toxic for a boy or a girl physically and mentally. We should stop these things . Great video. Thanks for portraying the reality which is hidden behind the doors.

I just realized that Lee Minho tends to play abusive characters in the older dramas. I never finished The King: Eternal Monarch so I can't say anything about that but Boys Over Flowers and The Heirs he definitely did

K-drama is full of violence, yet people think it’s cute and attractive🤡

THANK. YOU.!!!! I love kdramas but honestly they portray problematic relationship tropes as cute and funny and it can be really dangerous for the young girls who watch it.

Not included in this video 🚫, but you can really tell how mature the relationship of vicenzo and chayoung, and we should have relationships like them. A healthy one. I used to feel butterflies in my stomach watching some of these kdrama scenes but as you grow older, we should not mistook toxic behavior as his way showing "love" to you.

thank you for this!! honestly it bothers me so much when these abusive relationships are romanticised in kdramas and people consume thesd without even questioning it. tbh it makes me queasy whenever a male lead kisses or forces himself on the female lead without her consent and viewers don't even bat an eye. again thank you for this!! you did a great job at portraying the toxicity of certain relationships that are glorified in the kdrama industry.

What I suggest you do is 1. Watch through the whole video without the CC 2. Watch it again with the CC on This is by far the most interesting and fmformative video I’ve seen about this topic/issue. Thank you so much for making this video and bringing this topic/issue to light . Keep it up 👍 (and I would LOVE a longer version of this❤️)

The way you mentioned each type of abuse in video is so good! Nowadays no drama is purely healthy(few exceptions like run on) especially thai ones sometimes it makes me wonder what kind of love is this isn't love is for comfort and feeling warm

Dramas which shows healthy relationships are I've only seen two tho lol: -Run on (there is a scene where he kissed her while he was drunk,later apologized still won't say a very nice act but it still shows a lot of healthy relationship rather than other kdramas) -Vincenzo.

Not many videos are like this and all I have to say is RESPECT. Finally someone calling out on BS that ppl call ‘Romance’

Thank you so much for bringing awareness to the normalization of toxic and abusive behaviors in k-dramas. I didn't notice this until I watched True Beauty and Love Alarm. It's really disturbing that directors and producers portray these behaviors in a romantic light as if they're something desirable in a relationship, but it's even more alarming that I was oblivious to it for so long. We definitely need to have more conversations around this issue!

Wow, this was exceedingly well done. Thank you for problematizing this issue in such a clear, poignant way. The progression from jealousy, to control, to abuse is both powerful and upsetting - you've really captured how terrible and commonplace these scenarios are. The romanticization of domestic abuse is something that's so prevalent in k-dramas, that it has honestly made it difficult for me to enjoy some of them since it feels like I'm endorsing toxic, manipulative behavior. I really liked the bit at the end of your note where you pointed out that most of these couples are portrayed as perfectly romantic, whether they are just a part of the always-present love triangle or actual endgame (looking at you, True Beauty). It's so heartening to see someone from the vidding community tackle gender issues like these, and I feel like it's about time that we start having these discussions about the media we consume - be it from SK or anywhere else in the world. Thank you again, you've gained a life-long subscriber ❤

You deserve an award, I just saw a whole lot of toxicity in this video and made me realize about such things that happen everyday and I am not happy about it.

I love this! Can't wait for the BL version (if you're planning to make one). Good job :)

if anyone wants to watch dramas with healthy relationships of the leads, these are some of my favs: •Vincenzo •Crash landing on you •Run On •Tkem •Suspicious partner

Finally someone said it I repeat 1000000 times how hye yeong deserved jojo more than sun oh why the hell people don't understand that simple fact also stop hating hye yeong for god sake he is most respectful male lead I have ever seen 😭❤️

This turned out to be so much better than expected, when I have some more time, I’ll have to comment again because this is such an important topic and you did a great job portraying it!

Finally someone understand, whenever I saw these type of scene I feel irritated and most of the creator show it in cute way which is I hated the most, like how can you justify these scenes as cute jealousy when there no privacy, self respect, choice of her/his. And things get even more disgusting when he/she kiss him/her and ppl looks it in cute and romantic way

Hello from the victim of emotional violence from Russia. Thank you for this video. I was sad to see it. Unfortunately, in k - dramas romanticize similar. I am sad that the girls of my country admire such. Girls, you're strong! You're not alone! I'm here! Don't let yourself be treated like this! I believe you!

This is so well explained i wish some autors and producers would be able to reach/watch this type of edit so they could learn the public preferences these days and change for future dramas and tv series in general cuz netflix is also kinda ✨toxic✨

All I have to say to the writers is: STOP ROMANTICIZE TOXIC RELATIONSHIP! Btw nice edit ;)

Am I the only one who was disturbed by ko mun yeong's character in its okay to not be okay. Especially the scene where she barged into kangtae dressing and certain scenes where she came on too strong.I know she was not mentally okay. I think it's just me.

Me before watching this: team Suho 😍 Me after watching this: hold up... wait what!? 😃 But no for real, thank you for opening my eyes, I now see how toxic that is.

I'm glad u made this one. It's a very common theme in K-Dramas where the female lead is grabbed by her wrist and kissed on the lips and I felt it was wrong and non consensual. They do have themes of toxic masculinity that is considered cute and mistaken for love when it actually is control. Thank you for making this one❤️❤️❤️

great video!! i’ve been watching kdramas since boys over flowers days (over a decade ago) and pretty much nothing has changed. still many forms of dating violence masked as “cute jealous bf meow meow” and the worst part is that most people see nothing wrong with it. i saw a clip from a show called problem child in the house where they invited a psychiatrist and they called out this culture, so in a way or another, glad that we’re at least moving on even it it’s just a little move. the most common troupe is cold male lead who got some childhood trauma therefore his toxic behaviour is excused. if you guys are dealing with this in real life do not hesitate to leave. they are manipulating and deceiving you guys using their trauma and that is NOT okay!!

THANK YOU SO MUCH for PROPERLY speaking up about this !! the subtitles and the description with of course the edit itself - toxic behaviour and relationships have been romanticized so much these days, it's sad to see

Can we just appreciate the fact there’s timestamps. You put a lot of effort into these videos thank you! And also thank you for opening my eyes it’s often overlooked and romanticized because it’s “love” thank you again

You've done amazing job. Subtitles are everything, portraying toxic relationships so well. Tysm for this 🌹

Thank you for making this video, it really enlightens me the unnoticed toxic gestures and actions in kdramas. I just hope that some producers will make dramas that highlight sexual harassment and assaults in relationships rather than make it seem "romantic".

Even though I like Baek Kyung, and I know that it was ‘his character that made by the author’, but if you put your shoes in Dano’s, it’s obvious that you will love Haru who always treat her well. Many viewers still not satisfied with Haru-Danoh relationship, but if you’re Danoh, why would you choose someone who always looks disgusted every time he saw you and screaming at you, never try to listen what you want to say and think that he is the most miserable one while you’re dying and just want to live🤷🏻‍♀️

I CLICKED WHEN I SAW TANYA AND SAYA FROM ARTHDAL CHRONICLES!!! WE NEED A SEASON 2 OF THAT SHOW IT'S BEEN 1 AND A HALF YEAR SINCE THEN!!!

Idk how they normalise and make it into sweet scene. My boyfriend never shouts at my face, never grabs me by force, jealous over small stuff, stalks me or kisses until my lips bleed (yes I've seen that kinda kiss scene on kdrama). So when I realize that my boyfriend's character is the opposite of the usual main actor in kdrama, I know I'm dating the right guy.

I love how everyone's talking about this and aware of what's happening, I almost started to think I was overreacting because everyone around me adored these toxic characters

I think this is the reason why I still don't want a boyfriend. Some just change the real 'you', they change your relationship with other people, they change the way you cloth yourself, they change your thoughts wherein you need to consult the other person to allow you. This ain't being protective or what, this is being stuck in a relationship like you are forbidden to act on your own.

Finally someone has made an edit exposing these toxic couples

woah i have watched a lot of dramas and i, ngl, always found it weird in the kiss scenes like the girl doesnt respond or she looks as if she was not expecting it and then the guy tries again and editors put in some slow music and blah blah, i always thought the girl was confused of her feelings thts why she never responded but wow, now tht i saw this im just- i never thought it was a kind of violence and the hand pulling thing, same even i used to think they were kind of violent in tht, like the way the woman would get dragged, but i always ignored it. i literally dont know what to say now tht i saw this, just thank you

please make a video of women being toxic in the relationship. It is common in kdramas and no one uses these scenes in toxic videos.

Thank you so much for making this, this is a very toxic trait that is too romanticized through dramas, books, and many other platforms. A lot of young and naive people fail to understand this and sometimes even seek this in their relationships. I’m very grateful to you for spreading this message.

this video deserve much more views. i really love the message thank you so much for your effort

i was waiting for this for so long!! just 12 hours more!!

Can we have a moment to appreciate how great the editing is?

OHMYGAD! Boys Over Flowers was so damn toxic. I hate that she ended up with junpyo.

the scary thing is that, what if people gets stuck in toxic relationships in real life and she believes that its 'love' because of these 'romantic' scenes of jealousy that kdramas have portrayed.

This is why the romance genre is a bit difficult for me, I am very picky when it comes to this genre. And also the whole thing of shipping second lead characters who get rejected but still act obsessive over the girl is just ridiculous.

LITERALLY THANK YOU. I love k dramas. More specifically; romantic comedies. I watched Heirs back in 2019, and it made me sick to watch how freaking toxic it was, then I was shocked to find that it was such a favorite??? Like, anytime I would finally find someone to share my love and interest for k dramas, and ask what they've watched, and their most liked ect. 8/10 Heirs would be it; and I'm like dude that's fucking wack man. I've even had people argue me saying there wasn't anything toxic about it! 🤯🤮

Thank you!!! This isn't talked about seriously nearly enough, especially for such popular media. Instead the violence is fetishized or romanticized in a really uncomfortable way, with a thin veneer of romantic music and different camera angles to convince viewers to see it as "love" or "passion" instead of emotional, mental, and physical abuse. It can be desensitizing when viewed on the regular or seen as singular instances "everyone has bumps in their relationships". That's not a bump dear, that's a "turn around don't drown" sign, or a road block. It is not one member of a relationships responsibility to "change", "heal", or "save" their partner. Healthy relationships are built on communication, respect, and healthy boundaries at least. This manipulative kind of relationship is unhealthy and unsustainable in the long run.

Boys over flower was one of those dramas which has no match in kpop history but My God it's so abusive and toxic. I didn't realise it when i was a kid lol God keep us all safe from such things

I cant wait to watch !!

This the best video about kdrama edits I have ever seen. Totally praiseworthy. Hats off . 💗

I am little shocked because there are some drama that I already watched and I super in love with than without even know the characters are acting toxic THANKS FOR LITERALLY OPEN MY EYES

Bro the fact that some of these were made just last year 😬

Baekhyung in extraordinary you was so toxic but everyone loved him

Oh My God!! This was such a perfect video!! It portrays the seriousness flawlessly! There are some moments we think are cute.. But the reality is that it's not cute. Jealousy is never cute. I literally got goosebumps after each scene. This is awesome! This is genius! 👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿🖤🙌🏿🙌🏿🙌🏿

YES thank you for making this video. Abuse and toxic relationships are so normalized/romanticized, specifically in kdramas. I always see the guy be soo abusive toward the girl and everyones like awww how cute and roots for that couple. Even when theres someone clearly Better for her, they root for the toxic guy. Everyone loves that guy but if he was ugly and the music was different, everyone would hate him. But since hes attractive and the music is sweet and chill theres no problem. I HATE that people always romanticized and pretend that the toxic relationship is cute. ITS NOT. Even with toxic people too. Being a bully is NOT CUTE, grabbing someone by the wrist and pulling them is NOT CUTE.

i've not seen anything about how toxic suho was until now; throughout the whole of true beauty i was thinking 'he's so manipulative', 'he doesn't deserve her' but nobody commented on that and i started thinking maybe i was being oversensitive and just disliked him because i preferred seojun. however i now see that i should have definitely not disregarded my initial thoughts about him. thank you for making this edit and shedding light on the toxic, unfortunately normalised, scenarios in kdramas.

Honestly, I've been thinking about this lately too. I've watched K-dramas but only few of them because I tend to avoid K-dramas that include 'romance' or anything relationship related and this video clearly explains why. It's crazy how people turned this into something cute and there are people who've become a victim to this kind of violence in reality because they think it's 'cute'. You can search up K-drama jealous boyfriend/girlfriend compilations, etc. 99% of the time it's about their partner hanging out with the opposite sex, doing nothing wrong but the partner is jealous and drags them away even after being told to stop. And yeah, maybe they did it because they knew the person's intentions. They knew that they were trying to steal their partner, but that's just having lack of trust in your partner.

i appreciate the hardwork of this youtuber and i am really grateful that people are taking out soo much time and giving right information abt feminism. i also try to educate my fellow mates abt feminisim but i just fall sort of words i've been learning englsih for 12 years and yet i am not fluent at it ( nvm leave this its a random thing) but i am really grateful that you clarified alot of things, i have gone through alot of mistreatments, harrassments and also given threaths. we only want equal rights, respect and peace. no one wants to see any toxic masculinity. if we treat you well, then we expect the men to treat us well two, i was just seeing this movie kim ji young its all based on feminism its novel is also available i hope the ones who read this comment watches the movie or read the novel atleast, i am literally crying and having flashbacks of really toxic treatments which i have received from men and by my own father too. but they later try to act like victims or just try to protray themselves as if they were doing it for my own good, my father used to tell me that am ugly, he cant even look at my face, he once threaten to kill me, tells me to always cover up, never lets me hangout with my guy friends. always has to say smt abt my life. and has hit me for absurd reasons as well. ah okay i dont wanna go really deep into it. there is alot more like toooooooooooooooooooooo many things but publicily sharing abt my whole life seems a bit wrg. anyways i am really grateful towards you keep doing the great work ily !

Thank you for including Uncontrollably Fond. I always felt there were so many abusive acts from Joon Young that were terrifying.

I might just show this to my friends and make an hour long presentation to tell my friends (we are all kdrama fans) that violence is NO WAY romantic.

Wow we finally see a glimpse of the main characters (some second leads too) that were always pitied for being heart broken or having a sad story which justified their behaviour. No. Absolutely not. These characters are toxic, most of the time to more than just their romantic partners, too. And you can’t try and justify that with their past. Main lead in cheese in the trap had some serious psychological issues and genuinely had psychopathic tendencies. Was it ever addressed? No. Apparently ‘love’ changed him, while the second female lead in that drama ended up in a psychiatric ward without any therapy or treatment. Baek Kyung and Sun Oh were second leads that were obsessed with the female lead and the idea that she was only allowed to have eyes for him. And it was always the female leads apologising for the second leads actions! Lee Suho wanted to control everything Jukyung did. She wasn’t allowed to meet up or hang around with Seojun. Work in the same place as him? Well now you gotta quit. Make sure you don’t even look at him or talk to him. What about those male leads forcing kisses on female leads? Absolute and utter trash. It’s so disappointing that all this sh*t is just swept under the rug and brushed off as ‘swoon-worthy’ moments when it’s nothing but toxic, disrespectful and in some cases assault.

THIS VIDEO NEEDS MORE ATTENTION !! just subbed and shared it , thank you for making this luv !

That's why I feel so uneasy while watching movies or something. Especially kdramas! These LITTLE hints of manipulation,narcissism, and obsession portrayed as LOVE is what triggers me. I am very happy that you pointed it out . My respect for you has increased many folds . Love your work!❤❤

I think we all could agree that the most romanticized toxic boyfriend in the Kdrama land is Go Jun Pyo (boys over flowers) HAHAHA and I used to think his jealousy and all was pretty cute 😂

YOU DID SO WELL THIS WAS VERY INTENSE XKRKCIKEE

I've watched some on this list and some were on the list to watch some day (if at all I would remember). But watching this video and the issue highlighted will surely make me think twice. Penthouse also found mention, that's excellent. I just couldn't feel comfortable with the physical and emotional abuse scenes. This aspect needs to be highlighted from time to time. Thanks for this video.

I just love how you included jealousy of all drama, like most of us probably say they are jealousy because they love us maybe its right but its not 👍👍