Violet vs Portia | First Time Watching Bridgerton 

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again- Portia is hard on her girls now so that they can live easy, gentle lives when she can no longer be around to protect them. And Violet has the safety of having male sons where Portia has all girls. She has less of a net.

Violet was very much a kept woman. Kept by her husband then her son. Her struggles were internal. Portia had to constantly battle external forces and circumstances and had no backup, or help, or safety net. She scraped and clawed and fought to get out of her famiy's home and to provide for her family. I think her circumstances may have been very similar to Cressida. Having to rely on herself.

Just to point out that Mr Finch actually came to call on Philippa, Lady Featherington had nothing to do with this match... and this couple is so underated, because they actually love each other...

Portia featherington!! They can never make me hate her

Anyone saying security isn't romantic, show me 1 romance book, 1, where the man isn't either well off, or at the very least has stable income and comfortable lifestyle

I think of Portia as the Mrs. Bennet of Bridgerton series Universe. Mrs Bennet in pride and prejudice is always remembered as the vulgar parent, who pushed her five daughters into society at the same time to find a husband, who talks too much, who is not an educated, aproppriate person. While Mr. Bennet is remembered as a Supportive father because he didn't care to arrange marriages for his daughters. Needless to say, he would eventually die and his wife and daughters would lose their home to a male relative. So, was Mrs Bennet wrong in her desperation? No. Portia was also not wrong for wanting pratical marriages for her girls. Where I think Portia is lacking is in trying to understand and being a warm person to the girls. She failed to protect Penelope from her mean sisters, in fact, Portia was mean to Penelope to the point that Penelope created LW to have a voice. The one scene that I cried in bridgerton was the scene where Penelope implied that she started LW to protect herself from Portia. I am a mother and one of my biggest fears is to do something to my child that would hurt deeply, even if its not my intention. So, to me, Portia overlooking and belittling Penelope is her greatest flaw. The sideplot that made me really happy about S3 part 2 is Portia redemption arc. Portia turning the Featherington house as loving as the Bridgerton house for her daughters, in-laws and grandchildren, healing Penelope generational trauma. I'm so happy we got to see that. And, for a mother who wanted pratical marriages, their Sons in law are the most loving green flag men in the Ton who adore their wives. It's actually funny how Colin fitted so well with Harry and Albion.

I have said this many times, Portia is a boss. She does what she needs to do to ensure that her family survives. She is hard on her girls because she knows the world they must face. Her treatment of Pen was adverse to creating self- confidence, but, when you know better - you do better.

Violet has had the privilege to be raised by a wonderful, loving father. Then she had the next incredible privilege of loving and be loved, taken cared of, and marry a wealthy, wonderful man. She had the luck to birth many sons who love her and are responsible, outstanding gentlemen who care for her and her daughters. Violet has the privilege to be a soft, loving mother and person in general. She's only know love and security ALWAYS. Portia has always been dealt a shitty hand and still, with way rougher edges, she's done everything she can with what she has to secure her daughters are safe. When you have to chose between safety and love, which she has, it's always gonna be safety. Both are great mothers.

I just love Violet. She always knows what her children need. Loved Portia’s character development this season though

Portia is first and foremost a realist, a mother who's trying to protect her daughters with the resources she has. It was horrible when Portia said "I married for security and still I didnt get it from your father". I can't even imagine what must've been like for her. Shes a strong, intelligent woman whos had to resort to some unsavory means ti survive and I absolutely admire that. Penelope hated her mom for not seeing her talents and strength, but didnt she do the same thing to Portia? She wrote scathing things about her family when they were already in the ground and Portia was doing everything to claw them out of ruin. Penelope's betrayal to her family is literally one of the worst things she did and Portia didn't even get mad at her because she appreciated Penelope's cunningness.

I'm glad Colin told Porsche off , Somebody had too😂

Yes, Portia should have given them an official birds and bees talk, but I can’t fault her nearly as much as Violet. I’m sure there was a significant amount of understanding Portia took for granted since they JUST spent months living with an unwed pregnant woman and dealing with what that meant. Violet literally had no excuse, especially when her daughter was ASKING and explicitly stating that she knew nothing.

Portia is in a permanent state of crisis with no sons. Violet is great, but she has the freedom to be so.

I absolutely love Portia. She is no nonsense and put her children's financial security first. Even the way she tried to protect Marina. Although it wasnt kind, the alternative was being turned onto the streets and she made that clear. Her character is strong as hell and I would take that over a Violet any day. Violet had a much better happier life and she probably never had to struggle for money

I feel like they both have their pros and cons. For Violet’s pros….she actually loved her husband, and genuinely loves her children and always tries to be a nurturing and encouraging parent even if she seems a bit overbearing. She also tries her best to give her children advice even on issues that she herself still isn’t 100% certain on due to the time period and society. Now her cons, she can be a bit meddling and overbearing but what parent isn’t? I know a lot of people hated her in seasons 1&2 because they felt that she almost pushed Anthony to be the man of the house after their father died, and Anthony suffered from PTSD due to that and not being able to truly mourn…..and while yes she definitely was a bit pushy about it, I think people forget that Anthony becoming the man of the house wasn’t Violet’s choice or sole doing. Society since the beginning has had it put in place that it is the men who always have the power in their households, and that includes the sons. Yes Anthony suffered trauma from their father dying but Violet kinda suffered worse considering that she was pregnant with Hyacinth, and literally gave birth that same night, while almost dying from labor knowing that her husband had just died in her arms hours before. Let’s just say that Edmund hadn’t had died, and Violet still went through an extremely painful labor…..she still would’ve suffered from PTSD, and the thought of might having to either get an abortion or to save herself. That’s alone can cause trauma for years to come. Violet even though she married into the wealth of the Bridgerton family, she still had no actual rights as a woman so she can’t really be blamed for Anthony becoming man of the house that fast. As for the days and years following….well she was clearly still in mourning but, they should’ve had a talk about it which they finally did….she acknowledged the pain that they both felt and she apologized to him. Now Portia…..she definitely didn’t love Lord Featherington, and their daughters….eh. I understand that she did what she had to do in order to help them financially, but the way she as well as Prudence and Phillipa treated Penelope was just messed up. She definitely redeemed herself towards the end of season 3, but I still prefer Violet. I’d rather be raised in a household filled with genuine love, happiness, fun, and kindness towards the whole family than be in a household where the love is basically transactional, there’s no actual happiness and nurturing happening, and one of the people isn’t always being cared for with love.

Lady Featherington is trying to survive. Lady Brigerton is trying to live. I understand how Penelope feels. My mom is always trying to survive. She cant just live and let me live. I have to create my life and my rules.

Team Portia >>>>

When portia popped off at cousin jack in s2 i literally fell in love

Okay about the marital act: In season 1 I was SO disappointed in violet for not actually having the conversation with Daphne. Their whole conflict in season 1 was that there was no informed consent with either party and I truly feel that violet could’ve prevented that miscommunication had she just been sincere with her daughter. We haven’t seen more of those conversations in later seasons presumably because they’ve been the male children but I truly felt for Daphne in season 1. At least the featherinton husbands didn’t push their wives into sex when they clearly knew nothing about it, though Portia also clearly dropped the ball as well

I think Portia is like Penelope when she was younger and since she finds herself unhappy in marriage, she thinks Pen will be happier single because a man will just control her life. I think that's why Mama P wants Lord Debling for Pen because he will leave Pen alone with all his wealth, and her daughter will not spend a lot of time with him.

I absolutely love Portia, she's pretty much the same as my mom. I think growing up it's difficult but once you get a little older and can talk to them more like "adults" you really see just how much they've done/sacrificed. Honestly, i was a bit fearful of my mom, as a strict and disciplinary parent, but at the same time even as a child i knew if i ever had a serious problem she would absolutely burn the world to the ground for me. Which for me was it's own type of affection. Yeah maybe we couldn't see eye to eye on every concern, but I knew damn well that I would ALWAYS have someone who would keep me safe and take care of me. Also, can we talk about how hurt she sounded at how Penelope wrote about herself?? I know it wasn't out for this video, but even Colin never mentioned it. Portia really does care for Penelope.

okay but even Eloise thought Penelope didn't even want to get married, and i think that might be the thought that Portia has as well

Violet was starting to grate on me season 3. She doesnt seem to understand that love can grow in different ways and people are allowed to have more quiet personalities. I really dodnt like how she talked about the kilmartins sayong mot very nicely that theyre a rather "reserved bunch". Well sorry that not everyone is a bunch of loud mouths like the majority of your family 🙄 and telling Franny to get out of her comfort zone. There's nothing wrong with her. She doesnt need to leave her "zone" if she doesnt want to.

Awesome video and I love your point about Portia operating from a place of survival. A fox will gnaw off its leg before remaining trapped; it isn’t “nice”, but it’s effective, and that strikes me as a Portia move. Further, I’ve always felt that the Bridgertons are the equivalent of the trust fund kids studying Art History and Museum Curation all “do what you love and you’ll never work a day in your life”, whereas the Portia speaks to all the parents who didn’t come from generational wealth and told their kids, “learn a skill, or a trade. Become a doctor, lawyer; a job that pays. The thing you love to do is your hobby; your career pays the bills.” Violet comes from generational wealth, married into landed aristocracy, has three sons lined up in succession to replace her deceased husband, an eldest daughter to help raise the younger kids, and lives off the interest of her fortune without ever so much as seeing the principal”. She can afford to “never work a day in her life!”, whereas Pen and her sisters are gonna have to grind. And indeed, Pen does

I think it’s also important to consider what kind of household they’ve fostered. Violet’s household is supportive, connected, and loving. While Portia’s is more distant, not to mention she encouraged or at least didn’t reprimand her older daughters when they would pick on Pen.

When Portia said to Pen. " I find great comfort that you will always be there to take care of me" that felt so harsh and made me laugh so loud, because that would be something my mum would say. Like...that is a realistic line that shows she is an actual mother. That psychological trauma that gives to her child ahahahah. And Pen huffing after it, brilliant representation. Also, let's be honest., Portia was not a passive character. She was doing the job for her children and she was honest with them. She was explaining to them how the society works. And she tried a lot to see her daughters shine, by giving them amazing colorful dresses, not getting them dressed like all the other girls. They would have to shine to get noticed, not to become one with the mass. And she was honest with Marina as well. Their world was not a novel full of romance. You will not always get to find someone to love and marry him, bc you have to marry him fast so love is not always an option. But you do get to find things to love. And that represents a lot the generation of our parents and grandparents i believe. They all almost are married from matchmaking by their parents bc they were told that they had to. And also, Portia is the leader of her family. She never goes on the side, even when Philippa is getting married and her husband is supposed to be "the leader", no, unlike Violet who made Antony be the one who would take care of them, Portia made the goal of her life, to make sure that her daughters would be secured. Bc the Featherightons, unlike the Bridgertons, were not lucky. They were not just existing and be loved by everyone.

I love Portia so much, she is an interesting character, she always choose her daughters and when Penelope talked to her about how she felt and got angry, Portia questioned her own behavior and tryed her best to be a better mother and a better person. And she is the type of woman that always “does what needs to be done”. A strong one for sure. I am team Portia

I can't help but love Violet, I really needed an emotionally supportive mother growing up so it's pretty healing to see the love and care she shows her kids. But Portia is still doing her best to give her kids a good life even if it is through different methods and I'm glad we saw more of that this season

24:27 I agree portia dropped the ball when it comes to pen. * her accepting cressida's bs cause she taking it from portia as well. * her personality (being a feeler) isn't validated. So she hides it behind LW. But I think violet picked up the slack for portia in the raising of pen. She had a Feelers harmonious home to retreat to. And was surrounded by other freelers who were her tribe so to speak. INFX ESTJ communication is difficult. But I think you learn to speak each others language. Well the INFX does anyways. If portia finds out about LW, thats your common ground. LW is contr*l, resp*ct,financial security. That the language portia can speak. Pen taking contr*l of her life,influence over others, resp*ct from the ton/queen, and lots of money. Now your talking portia's language. And colin saying to portia what no one else dared to do but should have. To tell portia the perspective of her daughter. * she is loved/lovable, why do you not see/say that? * her being herself is accepted, why don't you? * why so obs*ssed with standing and contr*l? It forces portia to try and talk to pen in her language. Feelings. To tell pen how her marriage made her feel, how her being a mother makes her feel. WHY she wants contr*l and resp*ct. Thats ya common ground right there. And if pen ever has a kid. Especially if its a boy that gives portia the financial stability she needs. And when she marries colin and gives portia the standing and respect she needs. Now you are talking portia's love language baby.

2/3 of Portia‘s girls are in happy and very loving marriages and absolutely worshipped. Pen… Dates a f*ckboy, And can’t really say I like the Bridgerton boys, or anybody in that family a lot

Portia reminds me of my own mom in the sense that she wants whats best for our lifestyles. For example, I dated a guy who's family is well off and well respected, and share the same religious beliefs and manners. I didn't feel a strong connection with him like I do my boyfriend now, who isnt well off and does not share the same religious beliefs. My mom very outwardly prefers my first boyfriend because of the comfortable and respectable life I could potentially build with him. She is set on me choosing the options that will ensure security and comfort. The only ways she is like Violet is that I trust her to the point where I can tell her anything and she'll listen and give her honest advice, and she won't talk down on me lol. She lifts us all up to feel the most confident we can. I loved seeing these two mothers in action throughout the seasons it was so relatable

I don't think Portia would've forced her son to take over all the responsibilities of the man of the house even with all that Violet went through. Like I just don't picture it. She would've prepared him and had high expectations but she FIGHTS for her children in a way I don't think Violet is capable of... I think all Portia's focus is on survival because Portia lives in a realer world a world where she's basically a single mother in a time where that is herculean. I actually disagree that she doesn't like Penelope... I think she sees herself in Penelope, she tries to snuff out her intelligence and creativity because those qualities do not serve in securing a safe match. I see SO MUCH of Penelope in Portia and I truly think if Penelope did not become Lady Whistledown she would've been Portia... probably worse actually.

I LOVED this video! And I think I agree with your decision on “who was the better mother”. In these Regency times where women were struggling just to have a voice, let alone any control over one’s destiny… you kind of need BOTH Portia & Violet’s point of views to see the world 🗺️ as it truly is. Portia was always in survival-mode because she didn’t have the privilege of secure wealth & multiple sons like Violet did. I always thought Portia introducing all three of her daughters to Society AT ONCE was a tad odd (whereas all the other mamas introduced one daughter at a time)… but after your video I realised that Portia had even MORE determination to succeed than the other families did. Violet’s warmth & patience with all her 8 children was beautiful; but poor Daphne really suffered the humiliation of not knowing the truth about mens & women’s’ bodies. There’s that scene 🎬 in Season 1 where Daphne is quite sarcastic towards Violet, in regards to all her well-meaning metaphors about love & friendship… yet not giving her any tangible information in those flowery metaphors!

I completely agree with you, Joi-Louise! I too am very empathetic and can easily see both womens points of view. I know Momma B has eight kids to move through the mart, but I too see Portia’s hustle and misfortunes that happen one after another. Do I think she is a bad person? No, I think she makes bad mistakes. She also needs to go to therapy, but that’s for another day. Thank you for the work you do and congrats on almost 5K! 😊

I love this video. Your analysis is spot on. You are fantastic!!! Keep at it.

Personally I think they are very similar women that have went through very different circumstances that resulted in the women we know and love.

I also want to point something out about the age of marriage. They refer to Penelope, and Kate as spinsters. The average age of marriage for a woman actually was between 24 and 29 - NOT 16 or 17 as many people choose to believe. Unmarried at 26 or 28 would not have been as problematic as this show and others would have us believe.

Love this video, thank you for the nuance which is so lost in the internet spaces out here 💙

you are a new fave! thx for your work !

I think what I like about the both of them is , what one is lacking , the other seems to have and vice versa . I love Violet but she’s kinda docile with certain things , where Portia would be cut throat 😂😂😂. Also I love that you acknowledged that Violet has always had the privilege of just sitting in her femininity and not worrying about anything . I personally think Portia grew up with working class parents , she tells Penelope she married her dad for security so maybe she didn’t grow up with much , she’s in a way more masculine than Violet because she’s had to hustle like a man most of her life to keep herself and her girls afloat. They both love their children greatly , but different ways for different reasons.

3:13 question question, so I assumed Anthony took on the role of father because he was the eldest son and and therefore the viscount bridgerton who is in charge of all the bridgertons specially the sisters. He is meant to provide for all the bridgerton children born in his household. He is a patriarch in his family and I thought it kinda just was his responsibility based on the society norms of the time. So although I agree it was too much specially for an 18 year old I doubt his perspective at the time didn't go beyond thinking this was his duty... The reason the Fetherington women were having such a hard time with the death of their patriarch wasn't so much because they would miss him but because someone new would have to come take over his responsibilities and they didn't know if the new lord would take care of them, let them stay in their home or not but he had to pay the dowry for the fetherington daughters of the previous lord. So even thought jack had no money he still tried to provide as horribly as he did lol

I just watched your video and hadn't realized you had not seen part2 of season 3. I hope you have seen it by now. You are going to really like what they did with Portia's character in the second half. Hope you can revisit this topic once you have seen it.

Great analysis! My mom is a little of both. However, the interaction between Penelope and her mom was my childhood. Im still getting therapy and healing. Now that my mom is elderly, i see more of her intentions. I still wonder why it was so hard for her to see me though. I like how Penelope blazed ger own trail which in turn she became a little like her mom.

Honestly, this season 3 really made me like Portia in general, but I think they are both good in their own way.

I can understand that porsha wants her children to be taken care of but the difference between Porsche and violet is that violet is that she is more kinder , loving and patient. Portia is starting to be like her own mother mean

Nice video. It was clean and kind. 😉

im sooo glad this video settled on both mothers being good in their own way- I was so scared that this video was gonna be like "Portia is the better mother because she had tough circumstances but *good intentions*" like I frickin adore how they wrote Portia, but no one can argue that the way she treated Penelope could be excused 😭

I started asking questions when I was…. 10? About the birds and bees. My Mum was raised by a mother who didn’t think my Mum needed to know anything, so talking about it made her uncomfortable. So she went and got this magazine, about the top 100 questions kids and teens had about sex. It had funny cartoon comic illustrations, and it answered all my questions. My Mum was the real Mum. She did her best to keep me and my brothers informed, even when she felt uncomfortable herself.

29:26 I just found you this morning. New subscriber here! I love your voice, and hearing your take.

They couldnt talk about it, they needed to be completely “pure”, and being pure meant being ignorant of everything related to sex. If the man suspected, even on the wedding night, that she wasnt pure because she didnt act all surprised and naive, because she knew what to expect, they would leave her, disolve the marriage etc etc any way, the girl would be ruined, thats why mothers had to keep them ignorant so they were really “pure” for their future husband. Not even lady danbury would have taught her daughters.

After hearing you break down these characters, I agree that Portia did the best she could with what she had. Violet had a much more stable and loving upbringing and lucked out by having so many children the first 3 of which were males that could inherit the estate upon her husband's passing. Now we don't know about Portia's upbringing or her life before her three daughters are of marriageable age. However, judging by her actions and the way she speaks to her daughters and others, I would say life has mot been very kind to her before or after marriage.

I love lady featheington

Lady Danbury gave Queen Charlotte the talk, so I think she would have been great at it if she had daughters. She even gave Charlotte tons of sketches. It is baffling that lady Danbury could give this girl that is her Queen the talk and not be intimidated by it and these moms couldn’t is crazy.

Hi Joi! I was really enjoying the video and your energy ❤ you have great communication skills and you are gorgeous too! However as an epileptic person who is photosensible, I wanted to give you a little feedback if that’s okay. The filter that you put in some of the clips was really uncomfortable to watch and unfortunately, I can’t continue watching due to it😅 I thought it could be useful to share this intake with you so hopefully other people like me can enjoy the 100% of you in the future! Best wishes 😊

Violet definitely has better interpersonal skills and empathy with her kids. She knows their peculiarities better. However, she is also very privileged. She has that room to breathe, and certainly, Anthony gave her that room. Portia probably didn't have the room to breathe with her daughters. Had she dealt with less crises, maybe she would have had the time to see them better.

I came across your channel and really appreciate your perspective. Deep diving into characters in the shows that I watch is something that's I've been exploring on RU-vid and I've really been enjoying finding a community of people who respectfully offer an opinion or perspective and wants or encourage conversation with their subscribers. So, I would like to offer my opinion. Portia understands her older girls, but not Penelope. To her, Pen doesn't have the qualities that would make her attractive in the marriage market. Pen knows that she's a disappointment to her mother in many ways. Pen not confiding in her mother that she wants to finally get serious about finding a match and changing herself to be more attractive says a lot. Pens distance from Eloise is really hard for Pen. She doesn't have the support system that Eloise has. Pen was able to benefit from her friendships with the Bridgertons in numerous ways. Being cut off from them was much more difficult for Pen to deal with than Eloise. I think that Portia was in a very tough spot. Her husband was shady as hell. For hundreds of years, women of any social standing were expected to make a good match. Many were arranged for a variety of reasons. Love matches weren't that common among the nobility, aristocracy and peerage. Not having a son was probably a huge blow to him. I remember in that one ball, one of daughters anticipated match was shut down by the father. Her made some lame excuses for it, but we know that it was because he didn't have the money for the dowry. There was that time they went to the dress maker and they couldn't have anything made because they owed the Modist quite a bit. I was glad that we got a greater understanding of Cressida this season. We see very clearly that she is seen as a financial burden by her father and doesn't understand why she isn't married and out of his house and wallet. Cressida's mother lack of care for her daughter is tragic for Cressida. I feel like under the guidance of some like Violet, she would've a diamond. Unfortunately, her bitter character because of her mother's similar character makes her unattractive. Also, the Hunger Games called and wants their wardrobe back. It screams high maintenance. Sorry if I rambled too much.

GIRLLL !! The part 2 is out now , we want a part 2 reaction.💗💗

I really love Violet but Portia just has some growing to do, but girl it is so important to talk about the birds 🐦 and the bees 🐝 with kids. I kept facepalming every time haha. I fell bad for Pen too.

I don't think Portia chose Albian Finch for Philippa. I think that line was just her taking credit. Finch pursued Philippa on his own in season one, and his parents withdrew his courtship over the lack of dowry. Then when allowed to resume, he was all-in on his own accord. I don't think there was really any match-making. Albian and Philippa are a love match.

I was waiting for a video on who Violet and Portia because I find them to be very intresting foils of the other and you can understand why they are the way they are. Violet had a love match and Edmund did leave them a bunch of money so her kids have the freedom to explore or get married later. Portia married that in her words was a cruel man and left them broke by gambling all their money. Portia had to get creative by embezzling. She is more realistic in the expectations of her daughters. While her daughters were also clueless about sex she did eventually explain it to them unlike Violet. It’s intresting to look at them as foils. I believe Violet is the more loving mother I would want her as my mom but I think Portia would be better at giving life advice in the regency period

The featherington father attended a few balls in season 1- I think there were at least one or two. The one I recall for sure is the one where he came with Penelope and she wore her pink dress and spoke to Colin about it. I think he also came for one where Philipa went to meet Mr. Finch.

I can see what you’re saying and I definitely feel a grace towards Portia because of her circumstances. I can even see her motivations, but I also don’t think that it completely justifies her cruelty. She created a toxic environment in her home, amongst her daughters. She basically gave up on Pen having the opportunity to find a suitor before she even had a chance. That’s where I struggle with the whole she wants what’s best for them argument. She never seemed to invest in Pen or believe she had value. Violet on the other hand has cultivated a connection with all her children and sees value in them. She is a woman of strong character and I don’t think it’s fair to just mark her as a kept woman (like other commenters). She is so in tune with her children and their needs and she is never over bearing but provides wisdom. I feel she would be this way even if she wasn’t a Lady in society. I think both women have their strengths and I understand Portia and I can even respect some of her choices, but I will always love Violet and how she mothers her children.

I love Portia's character with all her pros and cons and motives. She definitely stands out more and is more memorable. However if I had to choose one of them to be my mother, it would be Violet.

They have different life circumstances and it depends on what you're asking. If you're asking who was the better nurturer, provided warmth, love, peace, emotional safety and comfort to her children then it was Violet more so. Portia lived in survival mode and it hardened her.

Antony was first born so he is the are that's his place.. Benedict, the talented artist, Colin Middle child still trying to figure it through season 1 & 2 now he's a writer.

Yes. Violet would have what it takes to survive with a lesser quality husband if she had to. She is smart - She requested ADVANCED mathematics at a time when girls would have been more focused on their embroidery, music, and other accomplishments. She deferred to Antony only when necessary, and only because society, and the laws of the time dictated it. I think her brand of gentle parenting and love for her children would shine in any circumstances.

Imma have to Portia because I’ve seen her in HBOs ROME and I would wanna be on her bad side.

I think that there is no doubt that Violet is the best mother; just by the way she cares about each individual child. But, we need to give Portia her graces too due to her circumstances and how protective she is too her girls.However, I also think that would Violet be in the same situation, she would have similarly and as she should, care more about her children having a house, money etc over love. But she wouldn’t have treated any of her children the way Portia treated Penelope.

What's Violet gonna get if she was married to Mr. Featherington? Guess what, depression

26:43 what I hope we get to see is the effect violet and portia in one family will have on one another. Sure violet will think portia is scammy. And to portia violet looks down on her. But I think with a common goal (the safety and well-being of their kids/grandbaby) and time together. These 2 women might get to know and respect each other and rub off on each other a bit. They have things in common. I would like to see that. I would like to see violet teach portia to be more sensitive. And portia can toughen up violet a bit. Yes they will bump heads and portia will hurt violets feelings and violet will ann*y portia. But if they have to work together for some reason. It might surprise them.

I'm saying that Violet was able to mourn because she parentified Anthony and Daphne

Everytime violet talks, she sounds like a child. Portia might be scheming, but she can scheme bc she has a better grasp of ppl and society. Violet grew up rich and went from her fathers protection straight to her husbands. Violet never had to worry abt the outside world.

Yes, Portia had certain circumstances that she had to overcome that Violet Didn’t but I think we need to remember that Porsche also made things worse for herself because she is an unkind person. If She would’ve raised her daughters kinder and less dumb They may have had better matches. Also, she could’ve had a secure life if she wouldn’t have interfered in cousin Jack’s plans of Marrying Cresida Cowper. But because she thinks she knows everything‘s best, she shot herself and her family in the foot.

9:35 I disagree. Portia Bridgerton would still want contr*l and resp*ct even if she had money. If she became the Bridgerton mom, I think she might get along with Anthony but Anthony wouldn't be Anthony then cause portia would be the one in contr*l leading the place. And portia would be bumping heads with most of the Bridgerton kids (the feelers), fran(infj), Benedict (isfp) and Colin (enfp) especially. Just look at 3x05 when portia interacted with colin. He saw through that and wasn't having any of it. Colin wouldn't be happy at home with mamma portia. Fran might also psych*analyse the sh^t out of portia and be able to handle or avoid portia. But simply adding portia would mess that dynamic up. Especially if the harmony creator violet disappeared. But violet featherington would be a mess as well. Sure she would have a close bond with pen. They would basically be sisters. But the featheringtons money problems wouldn't be something violet would be able to handle well emotionally speaking. What I like to see is a dynamic with a featherington- Bridgerton household with both portia and violet getting involved. Like my mother always said about her and my father "we complete each other". For day to day life, violet is your go to. For times of trouble call in the portia cav*lry.

I don’t think it’s fair to compare them on their circumstances. Violet sees her kids as individuals and values each one of them, and she wants what’s best for each child. Violet is extremely resourceful and works damn hard to create opportunities. Violet combines these to be more effective than Portia. She’s genuinely the better mother because she - unlike Portia - makes sure her children feel loved and supported the entire time that she is working to provide for them. She builds her children to be confident, capable people who know who they are, support one another and can succeed on their own as well as with her campaigns. Violet, in Portia’s situation, would have done far better than Portia and much faster, with more grace. Portia’s kids have no idea who they are, don’t look out for one another and don’t feel loved. Certainly Penelope has it the worst and would have already been married to Colin far sooner if Portia hadn’t spent her entire life telling her she as a person was worthless. Gotta massively disagree with you here. A provider does not a mother make.

Portia is tough but she's a RIDER!!! Shes gonna take care of her girls. They might be emtionally damaged lol but she know how to keep a roof over head

I think Portia is specially harsh on Penelope because she reminds her of a younger version of portia , this is just my point of view.

Honestly, I don’t think Violet is a great mother to all of her kids. I can’t deal with her openly preferring some of them to others. Like, the way she treats Anthony and Eloise? 90% of her interactions with the two of them are criticism. Watching season one back after season two, I have so much sympathy for Anthony because everything he did was to help Daphne in his own way, and it is literally just met with the two women complaining. Keeping away guys he knows well enough to know they would not be the sort of husband Daphne wants? He’s stopping her from ever finding a match. Arranging a match with someone who he feels can safely provide security and won’t hurt her? He made a bad choice and should have known better (despite the fact I’m pretty sure the concerns about Berbrook were never raised with him beforehand, at least not on screen). This trend of always assuming and thinking the worst of him extends into season two. Violet genuinely seems to resent him for the crime of not being his dad, something that was touched on a little more in season two (though not enough to darken the tone of the show). And Eloise fully just hides behind her sisters so she doesn’t have to deal with her mum’s expectations, something that is made clear in the show on multiple occasions. Violet begrudgingly accepts that Eloise doesn’t want the life expected of her just yet, but she doesn’t drop it completely. She ignores Benedict and doesn’t believe Francesca when she falls in love with John. I don’t think she’s a bad person, but I don’t think she’s a good parent. At least, not to all of her children. I think she is a person with flaws that probably should’ve been dealt with a hell of a lot sooner, because it’s her kids that end up suffering. I believe there was a throwaway line in season two (and if not I have the most vivid memory of something that never happened) about her having PPD until Hyacinth was 4 and basically leaving Anthony to do everything. Again, doesn’t make her a bad mother to all of her children, but I wouldn’t say she’s a good mother to all of them either.

Portia is basically the Kris Jenner in the Bridgerton universe. She's always trying to put her daughters on which I respect. Portia isn't my favorite, but I respect her hustle and in her situation, she has no choice but to have thick skin. She had to become the father and the mother to her children, especially after her husband's death. In that time period when your husband left you nothing and you have no heir to your family's name, you can't be weak. She has good intentions just like Violet it's just her delivery needs some work. Part 2 she does redeem herself which I love. Violet has the opportunity to be soft and feminine because she doesn't have any worries. She lived a privileged life and I'm not mad about it, I love that for her. Even in Queen Charlotte Lady Danbury told Violet she was very fortunate that she was loved and Violet had a hard time understanding where Lady Danbury was coming from. It was some ignorance in her of not fully seeing how she lived a soft lifestyle her whole life and never experienced struggle. I equally respect both mothers they care for their children, and the only difference is how they go about it. I want the show-runners to make another spin-off show just like they did with Queen Charlotte but have the story centered on young Violet and young Edmond. I want to see how their story came to be and how they became the Bridgertons I would also want to see young Portia and young Lord Featherington in the series as side characters to see the whole dynamic of both couples and their upbringings so we can have a better understanding on why the families are so different from one another. I love your videos BTW can't wait for you to see part 2.

Personally, not a fan of how violet basically shut down when losing her husband. Don't get me wrong, it is understandable, but when you are a parent, you don't have the luxury to shut down, u gotta keep going for your kids. It felt very hunger games in that moment in season 2, only difference was the wealth keeping them afloat. Parentifying Anthony was probably Violet's biggest mistake. Also don't get me wrong, society kind of thrust that onto him as well, since they weren't listening to what violet wanted during her labor, so that is on society there, but what happened after was on violet for that part of Anthony's trauma.

Make a video about Eloise as a friend?

Ok this is an interesting topic. Personally my dad has the same personality type as portia (estj). And my mom was esfj like violet. Both types have its plus sides and down sides. But in portia's case there is also some narc elements going on. But lets stick to just look at their personalities for a sec. Portia: She wants contr*l and to be the head of the household and to be resp*cted (that's an estj thing). They wanna feel needed. They think feelings are we*kness and you are whining if you express them. They are more "if you have a problem, learn to live with it, do something about it but don't sit there whining about it" kinda people. Thats cause feelings is low on their function stack. Its not the language they think in, h^ck they don't like it. Not your feelings and especially not having to deal with their own. Brightside, they run a tight ship and when sh^t hits the van they will remain calm and fix it. They are organised, efficient with money on the mind. Violet: They sacr*fise themselves for the ones they love. Family wellbeing, harmony and traditions are important. But they are constantly worried (about those loved ones) and in their feeling. How these types will be perceived will depend on the personality type of the perceiver. But speaking as an INFJ I can understand Pen, who is an INFP. Downside to both types of mothers which will effect their kids is that portia wants to be in contr*l, lead and be resp*cted. Which can lead to them needing for pen to BE contr*lled instead of learning your kid to claiming self ownership,be referential and not talk back if portia is disr*spectful and emotionally h*rtful or dismissive of feelings. So pen learns to disregard her own feelings and take the bs from cressida. And pen has feelings high on her function stack, she literally doesn't talk in the same language as portia cause portia doesn't do feelings. So portia thinks pen is we*k. And romance, love, feelings, being creative are all thinks pen loves and portia thinks is we*k bs. It makes the interaction more difficult. Violet on the other hand is great with feelings and harmony in the household (no wonder pen loved being there, they speak her language). Downside to violet is when she isn't in balance and is in her feels she will lean on others. In this case, Anthony. A burden Anthony shouldn't have to bare. You become your parents parent. Ok security being romantic to an estj. Yeah it is romantic if your partner wants to provide you with financial security. But I think emotional stability and freedom also has its marrits.

I don’t think she was a bad mom. A lot of moms become like her when the husband or father present isn’t doing his diligence. She don’t have the energy to emotionally intelligent and manage their household.

In the books, Lady Featherington is already a widow.

Honestly I started to hate the writers. Daphne didn't get proper Sex Ed from Violet to have that stupid r*pe of Simon and Daphne being violent towards him. "inserts himself where?" was just a joke... Both Eloise and Creseda (her redemption arc was botched) became (more) monsters towards Penelope, so she has to reveal her secret identity. I am so annoyed with the writing...

I don't think lady Danbury was a good mother o really cared for her children. She had them out of obligation. We see on queen Charlotte that the boy didn't feel comfortable with her plus the fact they are never around and she says she is lucky they are far...😢😅

Your coils are so defined and lustrous. Gorgeous to the point of distraction.

violet is able to be the soft nurturing mother because of the male support she had in her life. Portia reminds me a lot of my own mother. These types of women had to earn their place in society and were not granted the luxury of having a reliable male figure (be it father, husband or brother). although I like Portia, I just wish she was kinder to Penelope. Albeit peneople is shorter and fatter than the rest of her daughters, she is still her daughter. She could have helped her lose weight to become more healthy without insulting her or making fun of her. Also dressing her in childish colors was completely to infantlize her. In a way when Portia told Penelope I hope you stay with me it shows Portia is scared of being alone and wants Penelope to stay with her because she knew her husband was awful.