Naw, she wants babies, but not marriage, that’s making your bed hard. It takes two to make it work out. The male children don’t stay cute little babies, they ass grow up and try to start telling momma what to do, you need daddy to stop that abuse of mom. But my momma was a badass, 6 brothers, 6ft. She’d grab a broomstick and go up side they head, no momma didn’t play, she get ‘em and then tell my dad when he got home.
Exactly because they eventually got married. She was in the mindset of just in case things didn't work out with the marriage she knows she has a strong black man to raise the kids and not abandon them. Some people like to over hype the situation.
This whole time I’m like she looks so familiar who is she? You commented kita, it sounds so familiar, but I still don’t know who she is but I recognize her. Who is she ? 😂
I can understand. A husband doesn't mean a good man or good father. A whole lotta "husbands" have left their wives and kids without a second thought. If he's a good man, he's a good man. Even if the marriage fails, he'll still be there for his kids. It's a shame women have to think like this but a culture of fatherless homes has created a cesspool of emotionally unstable useless cowards.
It's a shame so many of you think like this and it's not because you have to. This has zero logic. Smh. She basically just wanted his sermon and ok with making herself a single mother. Why would you marry a person that's not a good man? I see why so many of ya'll are in the position that you're in.
@G- Streets Sir, you can never truly know what a person is/isn't capable of until you get to know, and in most cases, by then, it's too late. You must be very young to make such to make such a naive statement. For example, a person may not consider themselves to be a liar or a cheater until circumstances reveal true character. Don't be so assumptive. Human nature is funny business.
@@nanonano.beepbeep I see you great at speaking in circles & really saying nothing. The shaming tactic with the "naive & young" comment may work on someone else but not me. Using your logic.. You never know what a person capable of until you get to know, and by then it's too late right? So how would you know if he's a good enough man to have a child with? If he's that good of a man then why wouldn't he be a person you would want to be your husband? You cool with being a babymama but not being a wife.. Smh. Your logic has no logic
I’m happy they got married and are still together! Joe lost Kita for a minute. But when he came back to get her I knew he loved her! Tyrell fell back in the chair. 😂 I remember watching the proposal on the Tyrell Owens Show.
Im sure it worked out great but lets bring in children with a SOLID foundation black people . Having a black child is not enough. We need to not move in the direction of struggle love. Start a family with structure. Yes marriage is important as well as him being a good man. Realistically you lose out on the benefits of marriage and he can leave without any strings possibly screwing you over. Dont move in the direction setting yourself up for single parenthood. Other races of women have much higher standards for a reason. We are failing for s reason. We are too comfortable settling for less. In there case im sure hes a great husband and father. But in looking to start a family he had the right mind set. Marriage. Do not have a baby just to have a baby.
It’s sad that she sought a “good man” for a kid, but DENIED such consideration for herself. For a lack of better words, we call this “self sabotage”. Due to past relational trauma, she settled for a kid ONLY. Women, let’s love ourselves enough to want BEST for our children and for OURSELVES‼️
I don't believe she denied the consideration for herself. I think she's comfortable and happy enough with herself that she didn't "need" a man to fulfill her wants in life, including a kid.
I think she did consider herself because the reality of the world today is husbands can leave just as quick as a boyfriend and if we don’t get married then I will save me and my child from divorce. At this point in 2023 it’s sad but the ideal American dream family looks a lot different from 20 yrs ago it’s very rare if attainable in this day and age. For years women are the ones left with the heartaches and the child and most women see not wanting to be married as a survival tactic and not not considering themselves it is more so of putting themselves first.
I think she was smart. Too many of us marry for looks or money with l little consideration as to how the man would be as a father. What if she died when the kids were toddlers? Will this man step up. I wasn’t as smart as her and married a nice man. He’s a nice father but that’s it!!!
people always look at me crazy when I tell them the same. I want kids but I have zero desire to raise my children alone and I won’t just have them with anyone for that reason!
I love the transparent honesty with this couple. No agendas other than raising a family with a strong black man who is a good father. I wish black women could all use black men for this reason.
Backwards from what? Old ways of thinking🤔 The only thing constant in life is change. Every life form that resists or fails to change eventually goes extinct. Your old way of thinking doesn’t work any longer.
@@torilovebyrd8418 they don’t even know this way of thinking is new compared to the history of humans lol and marriage was invented for business!! Not love. They need to do some research. 😂 if only they knew.
@@pterodactylbullexactly marriage is not for love!!! And people always screaming THE WIFE GETS BENEFITS THE KIDS GETS BENEFITS...........shit is a business
Her mentality is what’s killing our community sadly. She does seem nice but doesn’t realize how deadly this message is smh, kids will watch this one day.
Y’all are quick to judge this woman. I am 29, recently divorced, this is my stance on marriage at this point. Too many men NOW don’t know how to be good boyfriends/fiancé’s/husbands. So when/IF you find a good man you think can he be a great father, provider, protector. That way your not answering those questions if y’all part ways or have children. By then it’s too late…
I'm so sorry to hear you're going through that sis! 💕 If you have the time please give the Dear Future Wifey podcast a listen, especially the episodes with couples. It really showed me that there are men who know and live out what it means to be a husband. I'll be praying for you!
Too many Black women think like this and it's not ok. Good communities are made from solid married households and children need to see marriage. We gotta raise our value system.
Alot of people that have grown up in a 2 parents married home. DON'T WANT TO GET MARRIED. Why because the marriage was abusive and toxic. Stop acting like marriage is everything when it's not. And if your not married and have kids something wrong. How many times your husband cheated since you been together. Or still is.
Black community is not changing anytime soon. It’s at where it’s at. Maybe certain individuals will thrive but as a whole the black community cannot compete with other communities effectively. This is one of many examples of poor thinking.
she works in entertainment. a radio personality so i suspect she makes more but if i recall the episode correctly he has his own business and does well
As strange as it sounds I felt similarly when I met my husband, the fatherly qualities were primary then i fell madly in love with him lol. I feel I could have avoided a lot of relationship grief in my life had I viewed a partner this way early.
Black & black the most beautiful baby's love it .A strong black man with a strong black woman beautiful King an Queen from the tribe of Yu'dah Love It ❤
Yes it’s great that it worked out for them but this is terrible advice or not advice at all just a cautionary tale with a happy ending for a change lol
😅 I was literally about to post this. "I just wanted to have kids" 😳 Initially, the kids were her main goal, then later on, she softened it up "...black kids with a black man" Initially, she couldn't have cared less whether the man was present or not. So long as she got HER kids. 🤔 I mean, isn't that how most of them think? Alot of these women, like the brutha eluded to, just want to USE men for their seed, and it's atrocious. 😢
@@isaiah6659softened up? Why not believe someone adding context, as opposed to believing they edited for malicious intent? My partner adds context all the time, and I definitely need him to to understand what he’s really meaning by what he’s saying.
What’s sad is thes women now with kids by felons and gang members, who have to be the mom and dad 😂😂 why do BW hate on the ones who are happy or have a good man 🤡
I felt the same way…didn’t need the marriage but wanted a solid man to raise beautifully well rounded black children. The ex husband demanded formal marriage. I eventually conceded we divorced 17 years later. But I’ve an awesome well rounded son who I wouldn’t change for this world.
Hummmm…, not feeling this at all… you ain’t right… !!!! Men.., protect your seed! Many MANY MANY Modern women, selfish women, and narcissistic women want a child .. but they don’t want you!!! That’s the norm! Don’t do it!!!
Me to it's nothing wrong with it marriage ain't everybody but I do see the financial stability and benefits that's comes with it so I see why it can be important but a good father is more important
Same with my kids dad. We are separated now and I was right . Still an amazing father . Life happens with adult relationships but this agreement to raise healthy kids was what made me have them with this particular man for sure
It’s a lot of Women that think they can give a child love without having their dad’s around. But the child needs both parents to add value and sense of self to them
@@chrissyh3270 Good point, I just am making a comment on the women that are Choosing to be Single Moms when that isn’t the Real intention of God. It takes to people to make a child not One to be in Control of Taking care of that child Separately.
I don't agree with her mentality of course, but somehow I understand it. And she was doing what a lot of people don't, and that is to a strong mate to mate with. Even the ones that are married didn't necessarily go into it trying to choose a strong mate. I'm just saying
@Truly Miracle Y’all aren’t listening. Having a father in the home means nothing if he isn’t a good man tho and marriages fail everyday but if you get a good man, he’s going to be good to the children whether he lives in the home and is married to you or not.
Wasn’t she one of the girls from the Terrell Owens show?? I used to love that show . He had another girl on there too I think they were his assistants or something but I liked them.
Yes, she was on that show. They were his managers if I’m not mistaken. The other lady was already married with a baby on the way and TO was always trying to set her up with someone, but she was never really open to it. I’m glad she finally found happiness and has the happiness she deserves to go along with that career she didn’t want to compromise.
Im soooo over this marriage BS!! Most marriages don’t work out. Please don’t tell me you’re the type to say its only a real relationship if there is marriage. People really choose to be blind. Not everyone wants to be married. I hope you have found a great husband.
Hence the high divorce rate all b/c of what is considered to be the “norm”, societal norm. Marriage is a business between church and state. Like make it make sense.
Right. And I think he should buy a few mansions on acres and have all of them live there instead of in all these separate homes all over the nation. Least the children would have more access to him. We know Mariah ain’t moving but at least when their children come visit him, they could get to know their siblings.
A realistic mentality. Most women marry and divorce before 45. BLACK WOMEN are 80% of the time SINGLE MOTHERS. And around 70% of black kids come from broken homes. So it's not her "mentality," it's the sad true reality for black women in America. Be happy your demographic of people doesn't have those types of odds stacked up against you
She just didn't want to go through a marriage. That would end up in a messy divorce. Look at her, she's a grown woman and have given it a lot of thought. Probably earns a lot of money and don't want to waste it on lawyers fees, and spousal support.
If this was the goal for any and every woman having a baby the world would be a better place. Is this man going to be a good father? The rest can become irrelevant over time. You can plan a pretty picnic but you can’t predict the weather, at least when it’s all said and done the man will be a good father, doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure this one out.
If. She is. Strong. Mentally. And. Physically. And. Spiritually. And financially. She. Will. Be. Able. To. Raise. Her. Own. Beautiful. Children. By. Herself. Amen.
He doesn't look happy and she doesn't love him.. women must understand your children should see the family at work within a marriage construct....that is God's way.😊..but oh well.
Because they want to continue their blood line. You strive to have a relationship but a lot of women have gotten use to the fact that a lot of men would rather not be in the picture. You have to learn to accept both sides because things don't always work out. You can't stop a women that wants to be mother from being one. There are women all over the world with all different lifestyle that never got married and they still want to be a mother so they go to donors. Like she said ever man won't be husband material but he can show strong qualities as a person.
@@godva254 its ok to want to continue your bloodline, but if the men you choose aren't ideal, maybe you need to check what you're doing, or check yourself. Maybe its not them, its you. Just like it takes a man and a woman to bring a child into this world, it takes a man and a woman to raise a child. Yes, plenty of people do it, but thats the problem. People have lost sight on how things should be.
Escaping accountability once again. No her mentality is her mentality. Black women follow no man's lead. It's funny how they're strong and independent one moment and the next moment their mentality is no longer theirs to be accountable for. Unreal.
I don't think they really think it's hard to raise children by yourself. You need two parents to raise children and love them and teach them from right and wrong❤❤😊
@@orginefletcher322 BOTH Parents are supposed to raise the children whether they're married to each other or Not. *Divorce is at a high rate* so there a lot of single parents Dads & Moms. If the Man is a good strong Black person like she says, then it's almost a Guarantee the kids will have a Father taking care of them even though he's not in the home. After Divorce a lot of kids don't have a Father in their Lives anymore because the Man feels just because he's not in the home he doesn't have to Parent the kids.
I really feel sorry for him. The ignorance and stupidity that came out of her beautiful face was obviously embarrassing to her husband. Kind of emasculating and she didn’t catch him trying to change the subject. I’m praying for their marriage. Only a fool regurgitates every single thought out loud at once. Especially on social media. Always look at your husband ‘s body language and facial expressions. He may not be comfortable with where you’re going with your story. Social media is not more important than your relationship with your spouse. Love you!!❤
I understand the desire to have kids but they suffer under the wrong conditions. I can’t imagine having a child without a strong foundation, marriage for me!
