What Is Narcissistic Personality Disorder? 

All true. But the narcissist learns to "pretend" empathy and the right things to say but their expression is not authentic.

They will take your life if you let them. Run and don't look back.

Lord, hearing dr Phil say “they know what they’re doing” is OH so validating.

The worst thing for a narcissist is for them to realize you see them exactly for who they are. If you have a narcissist in your life don’t expose them until you’ve built up a barrier between them and yourself.

Never challenge them. They retaliate. Do not point out their flaws. Be prepared for rage.

They are also very charming. They win people over with this. And the part about how they ‘learn to mimic empathy’ is so true! Dangerous people.

And they're never wrong and they never make mistakes

Thank you, dr Phil. I wish I had known this when I married a narcissist at 18, he was 25! Spent 25 years of him telling me I was crazy. I was crazy for marrying him.

Years of therapy The damage they cause is unforgivable. 18 years of yelling & screaming & abuse blaming me for everything or kids. Dont look back dont feel sorry for them. Run.

Well, I must say, the world of narcissism is a fascinating one. While many people are aware of overt narcissism, where individuals display grandiose behavior and seek constant attention, covert narcissism is a whole different ballgame. Covert narcissists are masters at hiding their true selves and manipulating those around them. And yes, they do have some rather peculiar habits that set them apart from the rest of us. One weird habit of covert narcissists is their constant need for validation. Unlike overt narcissists who seek validation through external means, covert narcissists have a more sneaky approach. They often fish for compliments or sympathy by subtly dropping hints or making self-deprecating comments. They feed off the reassurance and affirmation they receive from others, and this habit can become quite exhausting for those who have to constantly boost their fragile egos. Another strange habit of covert narcissists is their tendency to play the victim. They are skilled at playing the sympathy card and making others feel sorry for them. They will twist situations to make themselves appear as innocent victims, even when they are the ones who caused the problem in the first place. This habit allows them to manipulate others into feeling guilty or responsible for their actions, ultimately gaining control over their emotions and actions. Covert narcissists also have a knack for gaslighting, which is a rather disturbing habit. Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation where the narcissist distorts reality or denies certain events to make their victim doubt their own perception and sanity. They will subtly twist facts, change narratives, or even outright lie to make others question their own reality. It's an insidious habit that can leave victims feeling confused, doubting themselves, and trapped in an emotionally abusive cycle. Lastly, covert narcissists have a peculiar habit of being overly sensitive to criticism. They simply cannot handle any form of negative feedback or constructive criticism, often reacting with extreme defensiveness or passive-aggressive behavior. They have an inflated sense of self-importance and believe that they are above reproach. This habit can make it incredibly challenging to have any meaningful conversations with them or address any issues that may arise in a healthy manner. In conclusion, covert narcissism is a complex phenomenon that manifests in various weird habits. From seeking constant validation, playing the victim, gaslighting, to being overly sensitive to criticism, these individuals possess a unique set of traits that can be both intriguing and challenging to deal with. It's important to be aware of these habits so that we can recognize and protect ourselves from their manipulative tactics. Moreover, I could've gotten hurt from the impact of been cheated on. I'm glad that i got to know ASAP, through *BarryInvestigation@gmail. com* and I appreciate the content you put out for us .

Telling a narcissist what you really feel and calling them out can be cathartic for you if you don't let them overwhelm or gaslight you, but it certainly won't cause them to change. The best way to deal with a narcissist in your life is to cut them out of it completely.

Both of my parents are narcissists. My dad is gone now but my mom is still a narcissist at 80 years old she is worse than she has ever been. They get worse with age. Believe me!

Narcissists should NEVER be underestimated. Phil is taking a kindergarten approach to a graduate level of potential harm. These people are dangerous and hard to spot. They're true wolves in sheep's clothing. There is no such thing as a safe narcissist. Remember that. Like your life depends on it.

I was severely traumatized years ago as a teenage, got diagnosed with BPD. Spent my whole life fighting BPD. I suffered severe depression and mental disorder. Not until my wife recommended me to psilocybin mushrooms treatment. Psilocybin treatment saved my life honestly. 8 years totally clean. Much respect to mother nature the great magic shrooms.

"They create this world of how special and how important they are" so true

It’s amazing how much a narcissist forgets when confronted.

I just left my husband 6 months ago, he is a Narcissist, you are so correct, Tfs, I finally had enough after 20 years, I lost my self but I just had to get enough, leaving him was the best decision I had ever made, peace of mind , I am so happy now

"They don't read the room." Brilliant. That would explain how I became surrounded by Narcs in my life because all I did is read the room to the exclusion of myself.

“They don’t read the room”. So true. 🤦‍♀️

My personality inadvertently rubs narcissists up the wrong way. They can't control me & that freaks them out.

Including children getting attention theyre jealous of kids ! Shocking isnt it ?

Omg Dr Phil.....this is TRUTH!! Horrible twisted creatures! They will rob you of your heart and soul. RUN...do not walk!! Go no contact or go Grey rock . It's the only saving grace when dealing with a narcissist.

Lawyers and Judges NEED to be educated on these monsters!! There is A LOT of injustice out there which can be prevented if the courts learn and understand the signs of narcissism!

I lived with a narcissist. I was young but didn't know his problem had a 'name' I was thinking he had adhd but I realized over time that it's NPD. all the things you say in this video is so true. I think to really be able to know if someone has NPD you have to live with them because to a stranger they seem relatively 'normal'. my biggest advice is to never get close to them and I find they are 10 times worse when they are drunk

You can NEVER reason with a narcissist, and they are HIGHLY skilled at gaslighting. Being raised by a father that is a textbook narcissist, the best advice I can give is limit your contact with that person, and never try to explain your situation with reasoning. Their questions and comments are designed in such a way that whatever response you give, they can either accept it, or turn it against you. I kinda have a relationship with my father these days, but I make it a point to NOT talk to him frequently. It seems that the more I talk to him, the more he wants to start prickly conversations. If I go a couple of months between phone calls, he seem to be glad that I called, and the sensitive conversations don't seem to come up as often. If you are in a situation where you can't get away from a narcissist, like the narcissist is your boss, sometimes the best thing to do is tell the person how great they are, let them know how special they are, and then go around the corner and throw up in the trash can.

Their exhausting and will drain you.

“The narcissist learns to mimic empathy.” Wow. That rings profoundly.

Some of the narcissists in therapy actually win the therapists over.

Regarding intimacy and the narcissist: you'll get more attention from a photograph then you will from them.

My second husband was this way. I had never heard the word narcissist but I knew there was something very wrong with him. I finally left. That was eight years ago. Best thing and only thing to do with a narcissist.

I was with a narcissist sociopath for years , abusive relationship ...and what doctor Phil says about empathetic he had no empathy at all. I am glad I got out of that hell

I married a narcissist. 12 years, 3 kids. I escaped but until the boys were 18 it was still hell. You can’t know, you can’t tell unless you’ve been thru it. I can spot one a mile away now. I appreciate my new life now with a loving husband more than I can say.

I have been struggling with my mum for almost 40 years. This one word has totally changed MY view toward her. THIS is exactly what she is.

The description of narcissism varies a lot, but I see the lack of empathy in nearly every explanation. I think this symptom is most troubling, and I believe it is the root of the damage they do to others in relationships.

Spot on! The only way of avoiding the damage narcissists do is to avoid the narcissist. Calling the narcissist out doesn't work, but it sure as hell makes you feel better!

Just experiencing this recently. Its so manipulative but boundaries and calling them out leads to outrage. No choice but to walk away.

They do mimic tho when it comes to how they believe hey should act that would show empathy. They mimic well

I grew up with a mother narcissist.😢😢😢😢Didn't realize how much damage it caused me in self esteem, identity, confidence& in my relationships!Shows like this explained it all to me.thank you!

As a man who was married to a woman who was like this, I can tell you it was a horrible experience. Cold and affectionless, the need to dominate and be right all the time. The need to humiliate me in front of other people, to put me down when I had achieved something and was having a happy moment.There was always something about her I could never put my finger on. Now I know.

Studied this for years as a hobby. This video is a golden nugget.

Finally Dr.Phil is jumping on this narcissist topic...it's important people know about these monsters and that they are real...

I had to cut off my daughter in law after 15 years of narcissistic abuse. That means no contact with my 7,8 and 11 year old grand daughter. There’s always a high cost for freedom. Please pray for our son and grandchildren who have to be emotionally abused by her.

If you're an empathic person you'll possibly attract them. I've had two in my life. I've gone no contact with the last one but now he's my stalker! They can't stand loss of control. Ugh!

Narcissism is a personality trait that is present in varying degrees in everyone. While self-love is healthy form of appreciating oneself and having a positive outlook to oneself, narcissism is having a hollow self-esteem to an extent that one is constantly looking for admiration from others. There is no harm in seeking attention and admiration from people. We are all social animals with a somewhat competitive streak which seeks possession of money, power and social status. Narcissism is considered a dark trait in the order of psychopathy and for a good reason. Narcissists (people with pathological narcissism who “if” diagnosed would be labelled as narcissistic personality disordered individuals) often exploit people for the pursuit of unwavering attention, admiration and affection. They lack real empathy. They cannot connect with people’s emotions effectively. They do not see people as human beings with feelings and separate identity. Narcissists cannot love. At least not like neurotypicals do. If they like someone, they will pursue that person by love-bombing. Once the chase phase is over, it all rapidly goes downhill. Then starts the devaluing process. They suddenly find only faults in you. You are not well-read enough, not sophisticated enough, not charming enough. Why? Because you have accepted them enough to love them unconditionally. And in a narcissist’s mind, they don’t deserve unconditional love. Anyone who loves them isn’t worth their time. This goes back to how they were treated by their parents. Loved but conditionally; when they scored good marks, when they learned to not cry about things. They were basically (unconsciously) trained to not attend to feelings. That is not to say that they don’t feel, they very much do but they are unable to process their own feelings. Do you feel this way? Do you feel hollow and blank when it comes to feelings towards another person? Do you sometimes get confused about your rapidly fluctuating feelings? These are hard questions. It is hard to understand, let aside accept such pathological hard-wired thought process. But there is a reason one must self-reflect as often as possible. We are unconsciously hurting people when we much rather won’t. Being a narcissist can be extremely lonely and tiresome. Imagine having to wear a mask of feigned perfection 24x7 while continually berating oneself about every possible imperfection and others’ successes. The answer will give you the answer to your sub-question. TO CATCH NARCISSIST RED HANDED HIRE Metaspyhub@gmail. com. THEY ARE SO SWIFT ACCURATE AND RELIABLE

My name is Maria and I am in the year 2024 and I for the first time in my life have experienced the abuse in the evil that lurks within a true narcissist! Thank you Dr Phil well appreciated❤🎉

It's become an epidemic in society...if there's no consequences then they'll keep on doing what they do and no one holds them accountable. The best thing to do is run...run really fast in the opposite direction.

omg I have been dealing with this for 20 years... my ex narcissist cop husband... a monster.

Keep talking about these toxic individuals! You have an abundant platform for so many to be educated on this! These individuals, especially the the covert passive aggressive narcissist! They look “normal” but cause total emotional devastation!

My mother is like this. Everything is about her and my brother is the same. I truly understand this disorder.

A tree fell on my car after a bad storm. I was told that it was my fault for parking under the tree. 😂😂I can laugh now but at the time, I felt like crap.

It's a very sad situation for narcissists because they don't understand the reality of any situation. It's not like a liar who chooses to lie; they literally don't know they're messed up.

Covert narcs can pretend to care about the persons dog that got hit. They are getting good with their tactics. They know hey have to pretend now like you said mimic empathy….

"no ability to reflect feelings" - best description and example I've ever heard of NPD

The narcissist won't respond to therapy because they don't believe they've done anything wrong. You're lucky if you even got them to the therapist's office.

This describes my niece who is only 14, and my sister will not hear a word against her. God help her in the future.

And all the narcissists give a thumbs down. 😁 Thanks for this...I no longer will waste my words on a certain person anymore. You are absolutely right...you get nowhere with this type!

Thank you for confirming how my oldest sister treats me. As a sister I never wanted to believe that she was so vindictive, selfish and outright mean. I have called her out and she gaslights me constantly. I was told to cut off all contact. She is very difficult I have 3 other sisters and she's completely in their heads. I wasn't going to let her change my attitude, damage my spirit or make me into her. Goodbye sister I love you from afar.

I would be surprised if a narcissist would even go to a therapist in the first place!!! Nothing wrong with me! It's everybody else who has the problems.also they don't want to look inside themselves for weaknesses& issues.😱

That’s exactly what happened to me and when I began teaching others with my knowledge I gained from learning about myself, others and these type of personality traits, they did exactly what you just said here and they mimicked me, turned things back around onto me, when I tried to get help and numerous occasions and then if I hadn’t learned as much as I had, myself, I never would have had the wisdom to do exactly what you stated here, to acknowledge the fact that they weren’t going to alter any horrid behaviors and would continue to harm me each day, so I chose to quit my job and it was the absolute best feeling I’ve ever had! I took my power back, completely, and walked away. I’m so glad you are talking about this to everyone! I felt like I gave candy to a bad kid that didn’t deserve it and they threw a horrid temper tantrum. The retaliation of these few people still lingers and it’s frustrating. I don’t give them any energy. Even when I’m explaining my past situation, it’s not giving them my energy. I’m merely explaining. I’ve already forgiven them for their part and myself for staying around as long as I did, since it was at my place of work. Nothing is worth more than your own life! Especially when it comes to the safety, stability and well being of your own life, at your own job! I appreciate you explaining the difference of empathy and sympathy as many confuse the two. You’re still one of my all time favorite doctors! You know your information in all areas! Happy holidays to you and your family! 😊🙏🎄🌟

Once you've had a relationship with a narcissist and learned what they are you can spot them easily. You start to realize they are everywhere. Even the covert narcissist becomes seen fairly quickly. You start to realize they gravitate towards jobs that wield power such as cops, Doctors, politicians. These fields are rampant with narcissists. These people are the biggest threat to humanity. Educating yourself will help you immensely. God bless you who reads this! 🙏

Mine always has a “better” or “worse” thing , experience that you . Not one word about your situation just straight to why their experience is more important than yours

Straight up nailed it. I get bullied and gaslight for calling out the NPD morons but now I realized they won’t change so I stopped and walk away. Don’t give them any power with your reaction. Narcissist love to see fear in people. Thank you Dr. Phil!

What it boils down to is a real Narcissist is always ready for a good fight and they must win at all cost. And it don't matter to them how many feeling they must hurt to get what they want.

My High School sweetheart was narcissistic. We're talking 1968, which is long before we knew what narcissism was. She would flirt with every male around, which of course made me quite jealous. She hated other 'pretty' girls. Our lives parted in 1969, college, etc. We saw each other in 2008 at the High School 40th reunion. The spark between us still existed and was comfortable. On the 2nd day of the reunion, I observed behavior from 1968, her flirting, etc. She was so excited about her friend count on Facebook, which was in its infancy. I asked, and she knew perhaps 10% of the folks on her 'friend' list. The reunion ended and we went our separate ways, but my heart was missing her. Then, I observed the Johnny Depp and Amanda Heard defamation trial, and by golly, I recognized that behavior. And then to hear the psychologist testimony, I finally understood what narcissistisim was. I no longer pined for my HS sweetheart.

Thanks for the info I have a narcissist wife and boss so it’s dangerous every day My wife wasn’t like that at all when I met her but it seems like something she grew into over the years It’s really sad she was such a sweet understanding person That now just seems cold most of the time At best superficial caring about others Anyway Thank you

How true about how they isolate you. Used to get absolutely tortured for talking to someone else. Had to account for every single minute. Always accusations.

Worst thing you can do is calling them out. No one gets more enraged than a narcissist who’s been seen through. They hate when truth is spoken. It will usually just buy you more hate and weeks of the silent treatment. It never has the effects we want it to have.

I've been watching RU-vid videos about the narcissistic personality. Narcissistic personality explains a lot of behaviors in people I've met in apartment buildings who just hang around obsessing over other people. They feel entitled to my life and time. Supposedly they are getting my cellphone texts and calls Information with a cellphone app on their Cellphones and I've seen them unlocking our apartment door like they own the place. They behave arrogant and entitled

Everything in this video is exactly spot on. I have worked with these types of people over the years and work with several now. It is sickening when someone thinks they're the center of the universe.

I want that too…but it’s only valid if I achieved something. So, I just try to achieve something.

Dealing with a narcissist... Indifference is a beautiful thing!....✌️

This is crazy I’m going through this right now! This person I thought love my family! Just found out she hate my daughter, because cause of something my daughter did over five year’s ago. I was in shock that she want me to believe her lies and doesn’t want to listen to me what so ever. She said my daughter needs to be hurt, when I told her my family is 😞hurting. That was it for me.

Can you please do a show on the CAUSES on NPD? Childhood trauma? Dominant mother/father? Etc.

My former boss is a narcissist bully. I quit one company to get away from him. 3 years later, he gets hired at the company I escaped to and became my boss again. Nine months later I had to leave to get away from that monster again. He's 6' 5" tall and over 350 pounds of complete jerk.

God bless you, Dr Phil. You are golden. 💐🙏🏽

Hi Dr Phil from Canada .I watch your show at 5 every day.im.a survivor of narcassistic abuse.😁

They're aware of what they're doing. What works is no contact!

I was married to narcissist and I must say that they are very dangerous individuals to be around. I will avoid these kind of individuals at all times. It was a hard life lesson dealing with a person like that. Never again !

I pray for all of us who are dealing this situation, may Lord give you strength and make you brave, independent, and give you all the love and affection that you are craving for , all the respect and good that you deserve ❤️ trust me HE is with us

Narcissism is a spectrum and can depend on many factors. It depends mainly on the level of supply. What they learn is conditional empathy or selective empathy, and they can turn on tears when they need to. They play the Hero and the Villian and fool everyone.

If I only new then what I know now, I would never have spent one second with my narcissistic looser. I got along fine and happily without him and his insanity.

Hi. Dr. Phil. I am so glad you decided to approach this narcissistic "thing" that seems to have taken over us in this new millennium and is hitting us hard and malevolently! Please could you provide us with some strategies to stop narcissists on their tracks the moment they pounce on us either it is is family relationship or work relationship? Cheers from Portugal.

It is so true when you say "don't bother it's not worth it"! Selfish and self-centered beings who are always on the attack and making themselves victims and others are to blame for everything! Thank you for sharing your experience and knowledge!

Narcissist don't ever change an get worse

It’s bizarre. I’ve heard this word for years and I’ve never known what it meant.

A narcissist is special & unique, their Satan's spawns!

Dr. Phil is cool because he tells people their problem is that, well, they just plain suck! (A shrink can't really do that.) But seriously, my therapist spelled it out quite well-narcissists/ sociopaths aren't mentally ill. They don't suffer-everyone around them does.

I was raised by a narcissist who clearly had no love for me as her daughter. Then a few years ago I got tangled up with a narcissist, thinking he was a great guy. He wasn’t. It took a brain tumor to realize what I was throwing my life away on. I had the brain tumor removed (thank you God) and also removed the narcissist from my life. I will never look back.

I swear to God dr Phil has this perfect

Dr. Phil, you have just described my mother! This answer, so many questions, I’ve had over the years

When someone shows you who their are Believe Them.

"Don't bother". LOL. Thats the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

Dr. Phil, you forget they win the therapist over, they are usually paying for the therapist. Yes, they don’t have feelings and learn behavior patterns in therapy to manipulate further outside therapy

You find them everywhere, at work, university and school environment, but if you happen to have them at home you must really run away, they will ruin your life, including childhood

I’m married to one, I see my husband in this description 100%… it’s so mentally exhausting…

I lived with one for 10 years I literally lived with a demon I've gone no contact but he refuses to leave me alone The research I've done is mind blowing because everything I've read about narcissist is like reading a movie script about my life with him

For me it was psychopathy. He didn’t have normal feelings. He had feelings for himself only. He burned every bridge he ever crossed - void of any remorse or guilt. No gratitude to God or people. He spat on all the good people who were dumb enough he thought to be kind to him and the notion of a God other than himself. He was strangely lacking in commonly socially accepted etiquette and was uncomfortable in social situations. He hated me because I wore the sparkly mask and did my hair and make up and I was nice and everyone liked me better. Lol He told me I was uncool. Lol But when I went anywhere people liked me and wanted to talk and it made him mad so I enjoyed doing it sometimes 😂 because it’s very natural for me lol He just looks unfriendly because he really is unfriendly. He’s thinking about what he can get from you. He has no feelings not even for his children or grandchildren. The shared experience he brings to the conversation in a social situation, those in which normal people talk about their kids achievements or how work sucks right now lol, a normal conversation would be bragging about his latest con on a broken female. He seems oblivious to people’s reaction to his antisocial offensive behavior. But that’s all he could say he was up to. Lol Any friendliness by him is forced and you can see it all over his face because he’s angry that he has to do it so you will give him money or a place to stay. He despises kindness and will punish you for it. And he can’t even fake kindness. It’s beneath him. But his face lol grinding his teeth and clenching his teeth because he thinks he looks weak because for him kindness is a weakness.

One of the smartest men I've ever seen. God has blessed Dr. Phil.

I ignored it, they used grooming lying to other people gaslighting them about me confusing my foundation

I realized that 2 ex-friends of mine may have had narcissistic personality dosorder. The guy friend was friendly to your face, but obviously confescending and then i found out he would denounce me behind my back. An overly inflated sense of self, but in reality he was a nothing. The girl, she was very ungrayeful, very entitled, used to cry crocodile tears, gaslight, denounce and point out everything wrong with me, making me look like the evil villain. Both of them did. But when i would call them out, they would play the victim. The guy is cut out of my life, the girl died recently. Its sad, but good riddance to the fact that theyre both out of my life.