When Life Becomes Very Difficult During the Awakening Process

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About my videos: These videos are a resource for anyone wishing to wake up from the dream of separation. Awakening, enlightenment, and liberation are becoming far more mainstream possibilities than they once were. There are many good teachers out there, and if you resonate with the teachings of Eckhart Tolle, Rupert Spira, or Sadhguru, you might find resources here that address these deeper promptings to investigate your true nature.
Disclaimer: The information presented in these videos is not meant to diagnose or treat any psychiatric or medical illness. The inquiries presented herein are potent and can have powerful effects on the way you experience yourself and reality. If you feel you are at risk of harming yourself or others, these videos and practices may not be the best thing for you at the moment. Seek help wherever necessary which might include a hospital emergency department, a suicide helpline etc.

Опубликовано:

24 авг 2024

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Комментарии : 114

@bethhayes1 5 месяцев назад

In the fire. Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide. God help me get through this!! Time to take a walk.

@SimplyAlwaysAwake 5 месяцев назад

Walks can be very helpful in these circumstances :))

@SweetMellieSue 5 месяцев назад

I take walks and shake out my arms and hands. It seems to help "shake" the nervous/anxious into the right place or make it "right sized"

@Davidmcdonald1 5 месяцев назад

That’s exactly it. There’s nowhere to retreat back into. I want to encourage everyone that no matter what stage you are at or how deep your realisation is, emotional work is still extremely valuable for you, therapy is still valuable for you. Scott killoby is wonderful at giving this message. For me Buddhist meditation, inquiry and all the wonderful realisations that come from that do not penetrate deep down into the nervous system, deep down into the emotion body. Internal family systems, and somatic work has changed my life and has allowed all of the other insights of no self and emptiness to sink down deeper. It’s a cliche saying, but love is the answer. Love and compassion heal all wounds, self compassion self love ❤Let that love seep into your deepest traumas. Your 8 year old self who experienced abandonment dosnt want to hear about mindfulness or no self, he/she wants a hug, love, acceptance, compassion. Let’s give this love to all the parts of ourselves, even our anger and our anxiety and our fear, and just watch that they transform into

@evelinel.9827 5 месяцев назад

I was in Scott Kiloby's membership for over a year. Yes the tools were great at first as was the encouragement to do the emotional work, however, I felt the membership really went off the rails, turned almost cult like and I would not recommend him or the membership to anyone now.

@Davidmcdonald1 5 месяцев назад

@@evelinel.9827I Haven’t worked with Scott, just listened to some of his vids. I prefer working with a professional when it comes to trauma etc

@Awakehereandnow 5 месяцев назад

Thanks for this David, I'm so glad to hear you exploring your heart and vulnerability. What you said in the last part is exactly what the Buddha said, at length, many times in many different ways and provided many ways to explore loving kindness and compassion for our own conditioning and to radiate this into the world. ❤

@LinguisticLifeform 5 месяцев назад

@@evelinel.9827thank you for your perspective, I got cult vibes from him and wondered if that was "resistance" or intuition. It's confusing because I found his book really helpful

@annsunderland4673 5 месяцев назад

Yes love ! ❤️Totally the only healer ❤️ , can’t do anything when I’m in it ! Just lost , so much trauma, child wants a hug the love it never had ❤️

@Mary-wj2po 5 месяцев назад

Like clockwork for 5 years since a certain survival threatening event, every early morning total anguish comes. Shame and guilt seem to underlie it all, which were probably there even before. Self-condemnation as being forever irredeemable. The mind is saying it's true and it has proof. That's the core belief/emotion for me.

@benjaminmiller3075 5 месяцев назад

Yes. Ouch. In it right now. Each opening matched with contraction. Turning towards these sensations rather than coping, dissaciating, self medicating

@jimvega4749 5 месяцев назад

Well said!

@debbielunsford3116 5 месяцев назад

Yep me too!

@annsunderland4673 5 месяцев назад

Just coming out of a week of it ! 😱 horrendous !! I feel you , take care ❤️

@chipjones205 5 месяцев назад

<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="262">4:22</a> I was born into a traumatic experience from a caregiver. So I don’t remember much time that I wasn’t in suffering. I vanished into the world of substances that allowed me to survive not taking my own life for many years. I was led out of that world by Self. In this ongoing transition or awakening, if you will, I grew into a strong sense of “this is my time”. Self wants me. I was guided to a group that used certain practices to clear the “garbage” so to speak. Surrender, facing myself, making amends to those I had harmed, striving to live an ethical life, cultivating compassion, have been part of the practice. And meditation. Using the breath for anchoring. It feels so natural to come into what you offer Angelo. Thank you.

@SimplyAlwaysAwake 5 месяцев назад

Thank you for sharing and doing the work, much love to you

@TheMLMGold 5 месяцев назад

This is where I am too, intense shadow arising, stomach pains, insomnia for weeks/years, exhaustion, anxiety, rage, grief, despair and the sense that I won't make it through. The video helped to clear the layer of doubt and judgement which otherwise adds to the despair, and I'm left to lie down under a blanket, rest, listen, feel and hopefully get some desperately needed rest.

@pinkifloyd7867 5 месяцев назад

Pisces moon energies are intense right now and may cause more fatigue, take it easy

@TheMLMGold 5 месяцев назад

@@pinkifloyd7867 no this has been ongoing, nothing to do with astrology

@benf1111 5 месяцев назад

This was so timely. Moments before clicking I was just thinking to myself "I don't have the capacity to not feel this anymore. I'm feeling this like a child."

@amg_333 5 месяцев назад

The perfect video from for what’s going on at the moment. I haven’t even been able to speak in groups for 6 months, the child I was is here messing with me! Thank you 🙏

@life13525 5 месяцев назад

Angelo, you are truly a gem...you go with us through the deepest shadow material and give us inmidst the darkest periods the feeling that it is all ok...thanks a lot for your guidance that speaks so much to me at this time of my life...heartfelt thank you. Many speak of awakening etc...but few can truly hold your hand when it comes to this kind of metabolizing...

@SimplyAlwaysAwake 5 месяцев назад

My pleasure!

@rationalmystic5 5 месяцев назад

Much needed video. Few years ago doing shadow work it was a horrible time. Suffering appeared all the time and out of nowhere without any reason. No way out but to surrender to what one is feeling and embrace it mentally like you would a scared child. Feels like it will go on forever. But it doesn't. Might take months or years but it does soften out and then melt into a clarity. Later on when you reflect back on that time you feel nothing but gratitude for having gone through it. It makes you more humane and more understanding about the suffering of others.

@jollyrodgertr 5 месяцев назад

This is encouraging, thank you

@rationalmystic5 5 месяцев назад

@@jollyrodgertrwelcome. Wish you well.

@jennifersantos3918 5 месяцев назад

This sounded like a threat at first. 😆 The dissociation is strong in this one, so I feel like I’ll never be at the point of not being able to run into my mind. The only difference is that now I realize the dissociation, but just keep doing it. Of course, this irks me to no end, resulting in me feeling worse. I didn’t expect to be triggered by this video tonight, but I’ll run with it.

@AlexanderSamarth 5 месяцев назад

The synchronicity... I thought it was all downhill from awakening haha..

@KristinShepherd 3 месяца назад

Timely and wildly helpful. Also love all the comments. Beautiful humans.

@GhettoGandhi-lr1wj 5 месяцев назад

Been going through intense shadow work lately and i found this video immensely helpful. Thanks angelo 🙏❤️

@lennartp186 5 месяцев назад

I had a counseling session with my non-duality therapist today and we talked exactly about this. What a timing! Thanks Angelo for this vid! Maybe a tip for someone find a nice place in your body where you can feel nice emotions. Maybe it is in your head, legs, belly where you can find some subtle energy/emotion what feels fine or relaxes you. Or get a good massage what Angelo say 😀🙏 also nice

@zerkton2648 5 месяцев назад

I’d love to see Emerald from The Diamond Net interviewed. It’s a bit of a mismatch BUT I think it would be a valuable convo. She speaks a ton on the shadow and has been at for many years

@elaine2862 5 месяцев назад

The more the emotion comes up, the more I can actually do my responsibilities in the "real world".

@SimplyAlwaysAwake 5 месяцев назад

yes!

@elizabeth8464 5 месяцев назад

I feel like a robot doing things in the world that need to be done out of obligation yet it feels meaningless. All my defenses are broken to overcome fear.

@peterse699 5 месяцев назад

This is heavy. 4 1/2 year long struggle. I have come to the conclusion that the only thing to do is to wait. And during that time do some of the things you mention like going for long walks, getting massages, listen to you and others, know that something good is happening. Thank you for your work Angelo!

@prueevans8558 5 месяцев назад

Thanks for this, I realized eventually that I was experiencing as a child and then found my inner adult who managed to take better care of the inner child. Didn't figure it was a part of the path, thought I was going wrong, sunk into trauma etc. Overdoing energy work may have triggered what felt like a catastrophe, which I thought meant I had messed up but also was helping. I don't really know where I am but alright now. Beliefs were mistaken.

@Durga695 5 месяцев назад

It was so suprising to start feeling the emotions as me as a child, not all the time, but I've had some stark childhood emotions and states, hearing you normalize it, is a relief and makes sense now. Thank you Angelo

@AshleyStuart 5 месяцев назад

This video was particularly validating. Thanks for all of the suggestions too at the end. I find that what helps some times doesn't do much the next so it's nice to have multiple ways of coping with the difficult moments. I don't know if this is common, but as this goes along, it's like there's an intuition about how to handle the more difficult things too like I just know, oh, maybe I need to go and sit because I'm feeling a lot of emotion or oh, I'm feeling a lot of restless energy, maybe some intuitive dance is what's needed.

@annsunderland4673 5 месяцев назад

Yep that’s it exactly! 👌Wish I’d heard this a bit earlier I’m Just coming out if a week long of this hell !! 😱 raw , insane ! I have a help list too ! but no suggestions help at all . When I’m in it seems like I am that terrified child again! Serious doubt! fear! Everything !! And wishing I’d not heard of non duality, not sure this what I signed up for ! is it too late to turn back ? , maybe there’s too much trauma to face like it will never end ? Can I really live without the disassociating barrier, at least it’s a bit of protection. Just don’t know if I’m strong for this enough at all 😭🙈❤️

@AlyciaJane 5 месяцев назад

Lately, when fear arises intensely, I go inside of it, in “my heart” Where it is felt. I find a very, very deep, beautiful, sensitivity, tenderness, love. I think, too sensitive for this world, so I have believed / experienced, so it is covered / hidden by fear. That’s the best where I can explain it right now.

@jennifersantos3918 5 месяцев назад

Ah! This is perfect. I’ve been feeling so much fear lately, but finding it fascinating. Of course, my mind wants to take me out of it, and it usually wins.

@FetterMuncher666 5 месяцев назад

Thanks, in the trenches here ,these talks are much appreciated

@maryrosemitchell9682 5 месяцев назад

Seems to me then that it would be beneficial for each character to have decent coping skills “before the falling away” . Not that we have a say in it or that there is anything happening including anyone falling away. These are all just more stories for the character. However some apparent characters are more prone to self reflection than others, so it may be more of a glide if the recognition of self falls away. They may have a very “natural death” while others claw and fight each moment and have terror or lots of existential fear. Even though there is not a separate self, there is still a character which has grown accustomed to mind and body responses and that’s energetic for lack of a better word. It’s all just a story, but some will have more energetic blocks than others.

@prueevans8558 5 месяцев назад

I found development of positive emotions helped. A Buddhist group taught this

@maryrosemitchell9682 5 месяцев назад

@@prueevans8558 emotions arise both positive and negative. Those are just concepts and labels. They are there for the character to shift and change if desired. Both are just what is and allowing them to rise up and be realized is aliveness at play.

@TheMLMGold 5 месяцев назад

It's amazing how open to feeling I am when the fear and doubt of not being able to handle it is challenged and dismissed. Realising that I can handle pain without fear also opens to presence, and pain subsides. Fear/doubt kept it all locked in place unconsciously until it's made conscious.

@teresascott1648 5 месяцев назад

OMGERD! You are spot on Angelo. Being unable to disassociate is exactly right. I can see how disassociation is a good way to cope with this world but the stagnation of carrying around all those overwhelming emotions, never actually dealing with them just made me heavier and heavier. I just wanted to sleep all the time. Awakening is HARD but soooo worth it, imo.

@debbielunsford3116 5 месяцев назад

I’m get it now too. Can’t disassociate from it now. But it’s worth it.

@orangoetan2967 5 месяцев назад

The other day, I felt like self inquiry helped release the resistance and made the emotion much more bearable. But indeed sometimes it feels more activating and difficult to come back to that root. I do feel it is valuable to practice self inquiry while not being super activated. It seems to make it easier to stay present once activation comes up. The way you talk through the internal dynamic is very helpful. Thanks for sharing all these guiding recourses with us 🙏🏼

@jasonsaxon2309 5 месяцев назад

Thank you! This is timely, as always. It’s been years since my awakening and it feels like I am in more turmoil than ever. You’re right, our apparent flaws or judgements of those become so loud they cannot be ignored. I’m completely lost again and it feels fine. I recently started fetter work and it feels like the right direction. There is just a knowing that everything is okay. That’s something that first taste reveals… it’s all okay. Love your work and thank you!!! ❤

@elizabeth8464 5 месяцев назад

I wish I felt this way

@jodimiller2658 5 месяцев назад

2400 views in 11 hours.......this is a gooooood sign that humans are getting on board

@mike-t02 5 месяцев назад

This is what I needed to know atm. Thank you for sharing. It's been pure emotional out burst that just come out and attacks others at times. I needed this video. At first I was just watching my emotions and was able to control it from just happening but here lately that's not the case.

@HiluT 5 месяцев назад

❤ Timing is everything ❤

@jodimiller2658 5 месяцев назад

I love how you are now closing your eyes......I am REALLY FUCKING LISTENING after I see you doing that

@Ballsmasher69420 5 месяцев назад

Aren't these strong emotional responses damaging to the system?

@Luna_City 5 месяцев назад

Miraculous timing, my dude. Thank you 🙏 💓

@AlexanderSamarth 5 месяцев назад

This is like half the comments (including mine).. wow

@debbielunsford3116 5 месяцев назад

I figured you would speak on this right when I need it. I’ve done somatic work for years but this is deep. Can’t disassociate is right! I’m finding the right things to help. Thanks for addressing this.

@stevenrosen5955 5 месяцев назад

Agreed though Scott Kiloby is definitely more on the exploring trauma side which can be endless, and doesn't emphasize the infinite awareness which sees that there is nothing to work through and all is well perspective......

@jimvega4749 5 месяцев назад

Cannibus helps. I find that it relaxes the body, goes past the bodily contractions and straight to the emotions. I usually experience wave after wave of emotions, especially during meditation. But on the other hand, its about excepting all experience, and taking it all in stride.

@annarichardson8222 5 месяцев назад

Cannabis is a great tool for numbing emotions, much like alcohol.

@jimvega4749 5 месяцев назад

@@annarichardson8222, not in my experience. It brings my emotions to the surface, to the point where I can fully experience them.

@nadenasa 2 месяца назад

Thank you for clarify this. I know what you talking about and I really needed to undertand this. 🙏💙

@NonDual1799 5 месяцев назад

So clear and so beautiful, Yes!!!!!!

@minhvo9962 5 месяцев назад

Thank you a lot Angelo.

@Blonde3eauty 4 месяца назад

A year ago, the manifestation movement found me on RU-vid, and from there Joe Dispenza’s science behind it gave me a hunger and passion for more, but it was still just for manifestation lol. I, very unknowingly led myself straight down the path to awakening. I started wondering if I messed up though bc I went through what you’re describing, and the day the heaviness began to lift I found you, and your explanations set me free. I went from literally avoiding everyone, every thought and everything for two weeks. I couldn’t even convince myself that positive thoughts were worth it bc even those thoughts were uncomfortable. All I wanted to do was to be thoughtless and empty bc I had already experienced that through meditation and the sense gates, but I couldn’t even get a fraction of comfort through anything. I beat myself up the whole time. Now I welcome the fear bc you taught me how to face it, and I thoroughly enjoy the physical feeling I get when the thought dissipates. Thank you 😊

@SimplyAlwaysAwake 4 месяца назад

Wonderful to hear!

@Jade-nk3vj 5 месяцев назад

What timing! Just sitting with this. Thank you for showing up right now.

@SimplyAlwaysAwake 5 месяцев назад

You are so welcome!

@Sashas-mom 5 месяцев назад

Excellent. Thank you Angelo. This is very helpful.

@henrike34 5 месяцев назад

I love you, Angelo ❤

@user-xh5vd6wt6w 5 месяцев назад

This was very helpful and insightful. Thank you.

@justinlaplante8334 5 месяцев назад

Thanks - perfect timing

@snoozyq9576 5 месяцев назад

I've found if I'm very distressed that meditation just brings more crying. Finding what works for me and when is such a big journey

@annarichardson8222 5 месяцев назад

Crying can be a necessary release though.

@Iamthatpeace 3 месяца назад

Thank you. Just.. wow.

@AlastairGames 5 месяцев назад

Thank you! Helpful tips and articulation

@InnerWorkWithEvan 5 месяцев назад

Very insightful and useful, thank you.

@SimplyAlwaysAwake 5 месяцев назад

Glad it was helpful!

@Buddhishgirl 5 месяцев назад

Somtimes I start to worry about a situation because I see a possibility it could go really wrong, all the while being aware of what's happening, and then, I become very sad to see what I am doing to myself and to feel powerless about it. I don't blame myself or anything, I am merely sad to see what I inflict upon myself. 😢

@SimplyAlwaysAwake 5 месяцев назад

That cascade of emotions is perfectly normal , you can see the mind trying to weave a storyline with it but ultimately it’s just a series of emotions.

@Buddhishgirl 5 месяцев назад

@@SimplyAlwaysAwake the one thing I can't get out of my head is this : "yes but if the potential outcome I am afraid of did happen, it would really be terrible". Oh wait a minute, Wow! Right in the middle of writing this because it felt so real and true, I saw that it wasn't really, neither terrible nor true. Crazy! Thank you.

@jimvega4749 5 месяцев назад

As always, great talk Angelo!

@SimplyAlwaysAwake 5 месяцев назад

Glad you enjoyed it

@paulkennedy4305 5 месяцев назад

Thank you.....

@SimplyAlwaysAwake 5 месяцев назад

Welcome

@jitkawentskating2096 5 месяцев назад

What shows up for me are strong sensations that are not always easy to label as an emotion. Do you have any comment on that?

@annarichardson8222 5 месяцев назад

You don’t need to label it you just need to allow yourself to feel it. Labelling is mental. Feeling the emotion without labelling or attaching a story is how you it integrates.

@janewanes 5 месяцев назад

I have been having such intense physical sensations and am confused what is emotion and what is physical? Is everything not just physical sensation moving through the body with thoughts attached? I am confused what emotions are?

@annarichardson8222 5 месяцев назад

I would recommend reading The Presence Process by Michael Brown.

@renko9067 5 месяцев назад

<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="570">9:30</a> So when I bring up upsetting or disturbing thoughts on purpose, they don’t bother me at all. So bizarre. It’s as if they need to come out of the blue along with sensations to drag me down into unconsciousness. The thought alone is a big blank.

@SimplyAlwaysAwake 5 месяцев назад

the "stickiness" often depends on emotional landscape

@renko9067 5 месяцев назад

@@SimplyAlwaysAwake Yes. An amazing insight for me 😊.

@lynnhunter4493 5 месяцев назад

🙏🙏🙏

@Ballsmasher69420 5 месяцев назад

Hey Angelo, can you talk about why trying to make yourself feel better fails so much? Why isn't this working? What's wrong with this approach. Jesus man I'm losing my mind the longer I live, because I keep getting back to this place of "how long is this gonna take?", how long am I gonna keep feeling like this? And I do things that I feel are gonna make me feel better, but it always feels so sort of emotionally empty and draining, like there's a hole in my body. I tried satisfying my mind and these expectations, but it only keeps me in the loop and I always learn the more I do, that things are not as satisfying as the mind pictures them AT ALL...

@annarichardson8222 5 месяцев назад

I would recommend reading The Presence Process by Michael Brown.

@alfreddifeo9642 5 месяцев назад

❤🙏♾☮🕉

@yasmeenbusinesscoachingbus1919 5 месяцев назад

But there comes a time that you just can’t believe the mind anymore and it’s ok to not listen to it . I guess after you’ve seen it falsely

@leyashire4473 5 месяцев назад

What guided meditation are you referring to at the beginning of the video?

@manso306 5 месяцев назад

I don't think I can do any kind of meditation but "natural meditation". I just don't feel any pull towards any other kind. I'm telling myself that I'm open to try different things and natural meditation may turn into focus on something specific -- but would you recommend to work on this? Should I try out other kinds of meditation? I feel like I often don't know when I'm disassociating (I guess that's the point of disassociating), though often I don't even know what I'm disassociating from when I notice something that I label as disassociation. Maybe I'm just used to being overly critical of myself? It's definitely getting easier to fall into presence when I notice thoughts going on. I know I'm "on the right track" because there is no track, but also I want *something* -- idk what, but something... like lots of disposable income or magic powers or an ideal partner or an emotionally and intellectually fulfilling job, or all of the above... Why do thoughts make presence seem like not enough?

@SimplyAlwaysAwake 5 месяцев назад

bc thoughts (believed) will make anything seem like not enough

@fcalps 3 месяца назад

I don't get this. "Coping mechanism doesn't help/work and there is nothing you can do." This was also said in the "deep shadow videos". And in the middle of the video: "I'll list a few coping mechanisms that can be very helpful and should be done". This question is genuine, pls answer if you see it, Angelo.