as someone with ADHD and ASD, I am way too obsessed with being efficient. But I live happiest, and to the fullest when I take my time and do what is most important in that moment.
Switch ADHD with OCD, and that's me. One thing that helps me is using an Eisenhower Matrix to organise things and create a ranking of my tasks at hand. If you have the time and energy, I recommend making use of it for your tasks. Personally, I prefer to make separate matrices for my repeatable and nonrepeatable tasks.
Same here, but when I say efficient, I mean the fastest way to get stuff done. So my definition seems a bit different from dr. K., since he's talking about multitasking as a way of being efficient. In my case, I focus on one task at a time. The efficiency comes in when I think about the priority and thus the order of doing tasks. So for example, switching the trash bag out, getting a drink, feeding the cat, making the bed, doing laundry and doing dishes. I do tasks that are in the same room one by one and then move to the next tasks in a different room.
I have the same thing as you + OCD I keep noticing how whenever I just bull through something I feels more productive instead of trying to do anything as efficient as possible. Even if it takes more time I feels more in line with myself more. Although, even though I know that I am still trapped to my own mind that keeps wanting me to be as efficient as possible. Even though most of the time it cause me grief and being unable to take action at all.
*Me* :The most important thing is to pay the bills right now *Also me* : Proceeds to grab the PS4 controller and throw my body on the couch like a boneless chicken lol
As someone with ADHD, I fell into the efficiency trap: I remember that I used to tell my groupmates that 'best case scenario I can get this done in a day", until someone reminded me 'you're never best case scenario, dude'.
Practicing ek tatva abhyas(one state focus practice) 1- no mobile in bathroom or toilet 2- eating without listening or watching from device 3-staying as silent as realistically possible while eating 4-gymming without music or audiobook 5- walking in nature or anywhere without earphone or listening music 6-working without distraction of music, internet (if possible) or social media 7-giving full attention to your loved one with no distraction of tv, phone etc (Ofcourse where it’s needed) 8-enjoying music or song without multitasking There could be many others. But I couldn’t think of any. You guys can add more if needed.
Thanks for the list! Gonna add on as invited- I think #3 is more about focusing on just the food / on eating while eating (instead of doing an additional thing like talking/listening/watching/etc)
My takeaway: Efficiency can cause more problems than solutions. This is because pursuing efficiency may require multitasking, or parallel processing. Unfortunately the result can cause you to feel overwhelmed. You aren't focused, you're spread thin, and exhausted. Instead, let's prioritise, so we can hone in on one task. This way, we can organize our time to get tasks done with focus and intention. Then, we can quickly shift into the next task. This is a flow state. One at a time, with high efficiency per task. Ek tatva abhyasa teaches to focus on one thing at a time. Ek, one. Tatva, reality. Abhyasa, practise. IMO knowing the meaning of the individual words and their components takes away the fog and helps you see the significance of the idea. This helps to hone mindfulness, find flow states, set boundaries, and manage burnout. A solution I have started to make use of is called the Eisenhower matrix. The quadrants are by importance and by urgency. That which is urgent and important, do immediately. That which is important and not urgent, decide its time of action. That which is urgent and not important, delegate or avoid. That which is not urgent and not important, delete or avoid. I'm about 3 months into my PhD, and this has helped me considerably.
“Prioritizing” is a good word. Efficiency to me was always about doing one thing well enough (within measurable criteria) within a limited span of time, rather than what Dr. K defines it as: juggling many things within a limited span of time.
@@Alex-js5lgMy previous answer was incorrect. After a bit of research here's what I have found : The pop into your mind thing that youve described is called a "Eureka moment". Your brain continues to work on problems even when you're not consciously thinking about them. Unresolved thoughts and information related to the problem are procceced by your subconscious mind. When the solution is found, it gets "displayed" on your conscious mind (the sudden pop into my mind thing) , often when you're engaged in unrelated activities or in a relaxed state (Such as having a shower or right before you go to sleep or while meditating).
@@Alex-js5lg Good question, but he is still mostly right, the brain does mutlitask all the time things like breathing, heartbeat, etc, but it can only focus on one particular task at time. The subcontious is able to multitask, but not the concious mind, in the case you present your subcontious was still looking for the answer and it found it.
When drK said “while ur eating a meal don’t do anything else”, I was eating breakfast, setting up my study space, chugging tea and planning my day all while watching this……
What has helped me a lot was learning that the beginning of a focused work bout usually is really hard. That it's normal. The guest 5-15 mins can be downright agonising, yes. You may get very self-negative thoughts, frightening ones, feel anger, sorrow, extreme anxiety even, all kinds of things. But the thing is... It passes, it really does. In most cases, it just takes keeping at it until that beginning phase is over. Then, you begin to actually focus, get into the flow and feel much better, be happy you're doing all this, sometimes you hit a flow state so good, you don't want to ever stop! But then after about an hour, you begin to struggle again - that's the end phase. And that is alright. The whole focused work bout is usually 1,5 hour. Some people can stretch it to 2 hours for some it's 1 hour. After it's done, do something else. Physical exercise/work is best when combined with something that resets your mind, like meditation, NSDR, a short nap works too, just as simply having a snack and staring out the window. The point is to let your mind process things, don't overwhelm it with more information, don't watch videos, don't even read. Or else you'll cause yourself fatigue through failed recovery. After that break, you can begin another focused work bout. It really is like physical exercise, you need rest periods, you have to allow your brain to just p much "do nothing" in between these. That's when it processes the previous work bout, it makes you way more effective, creative, bright in the long run. But you've gotta brace yourself for the pain of the beginning phase. It's really fine, you are making progress by sticking to it, the pain is an indication that your brain is rewiring.
I cant believe I just had a conversation today about how listening to audiobooks while doing something else feels so distracting and not satisfying and this video comes out !! Another day of Dr K doing a fantastic job helping us understand our minds and take control of our lives 😊 Something that also really helped me get things done is not writing down "Clean my room" as a task but calling it a project instead. Because even though my mind keeps telling me to clean my room, Its actually cleaning the cupboard, cleaning the drawers , deciding where some clothes go , etc etc and those are the actual tasks.
That's good, cuz it encourages you to break it down into pieces. Listing it as "clean your room" almost implies to yourself, that you already know how to do it all, in an exact procedure, and you can inadvertently overwhelm your brain. If you're already stressed, and realize you have no idea where to start to "clean your room" it can just stress you out. Then you avoid it/procrastinate cuz it's intimidating. It's far less intimidating, and far easier to tackle, when it's like, I'll clear my floor so it's ready to vaccum. Then the next day, you could vacuum. Or you could do both in the same day! But making it all a project, that can have bullet point tasks is infinitely more brain friendly. Cuz then you're like, oh, I already know how to make my bed, or throw laundry in a hamper or pick up any dishes laying around so they're ready to be taken to the kitchen. I know how to do one thing at a time. And it's just kinder to yourself to drop one task on yourself at a time, over dropping a task bomb and expecting you to clean up all the debris in a day. Not setting daunting deadlines on lots of work, to be done all at once, is just so much less stressful! 😁
Dr K really is hitting the bull's eye for me lately. From the link between self-esteem and valuing your time, to the fact that I struggle to sit up straight because being 6'6 I can never sit with my HIPS HIGHER THAN MY KNEES! And now today explaining why my self imposed cognitive overloading, in the name of efficiency, leads to paralysis followed by mental exhaustion! 😆 Also, on behalf of myself and my brain, cheers for the project concept.
I think with ADHD it’s crucial to notice how pairing different activities makes you feel. Sometimes we pair things to prevent the default mode network from badgering us constantly, especially if we are trying to avoid something. Trying to make my brain shut up feels very different from engaging excess processing capacity with an ālambana so that I can focus the rest of my attention on something else. It’s the difference between dissociating and flow. If I notice I’m just trying to forcefully stop thoughts or feelings from popping up, it’s time to put down whatever activity I was pairing and sit with the thoughts. For me that’s also a great time to do a brain dump journal because it drains all that excess stuff that I was avoiding. If I’m engaged in my current experience or in the flow state, then I’ve paired appropriately and it feels like I took a part of my mind that was looking for something to do and gave it a satisfying task. Meditating with different ālambanas has helped me notice the difference and realize that I was almost always distracting myself to shut my brain up, or avoid the moment, not to enhance the moment.
Just curious, you don't have to share (should go without saying tbh) if you don't want to, but do you take ADHD meds, too? I noticed that my meds almost stopped the internal monologues entirely, and I was SHOCKED how much even the lowest dose affected me
@@finalcountdown3210not the intended recipient but I can vouch much the same. Whenever I am unable to take my meds (or whenever I have had coffee lately, oddly) the difference is astounding! For me it’s not necessarily that my thoughts are auditory and running everywhere, but I’m absolutely scatterbrained in which way direction constantly. I have noticed a reduction in this overtime, so I am actually planning to get my dosage reviewed soon, but let me tell you, the first few days on meds was mind blowing.
The biggest myth that I feel needs to be busted is this: Multitasking isn't the ability to do everything all at once. Its the ability to do one single task as soon as possible and then switch to the next task. What I've personally found out after watching this video is that moments of my life where I've tried to do everything: sometimes to please myself or even others - I've found less success compared to when I've prioritised a single task and followed through to the end. Now that I type it out it seems like common sense, but the kind of world we live in where we can pretend to do everything while not needing to apply yourself fully. Even while typing this out I had to fend off multiple urges that could very easily derail my train of thought, goes to say how necessary is it for me to practice ek tatva abhyas in my life. Simple yet effective method to practice it is : I've started with not listening to music when travelling to work. My mind is much more focused when I do this. Even when I decide to listen to music, I put one track on loop. Would suggest everyone to try the same if you can. Sometimes drowning your emotions with distractions seem to be the easiest method to feel better but definitely takes a toll on you mentally. Thanks for reading to the end.
Often I feel like I am afraid to put all my eggs in one basket. It’s more comfortable to focus on about 10 things then hard commit to 1. It is a very complicated topic for me. Although committing to one thing does making it clearer to see my personal progress but at a sacrifice to a lot of other things… anyway great video dude!
Like many things said on this channel, this rings painfully true. I just wish I knew not only how to prioritize and let go, but to properly grieve. Just thinking about abandoning plans, dreams, obligations, even if it would help me in the long run, not only fill me with loss, but _rage and terror,_ and I worry about expressing it because I'll feel like a toddler having a destructive tantrum. (Doesn't help that, due to society and circumstances, I rarely feel safe about expressing big, painful emotions, even though people close to me have said I really should.) Saved to watch again later. I'm most likely going to need it....
I have this problem since forever. I tend to add so many things on my to-do list because i have enough time to finissh them all, but ending up getting too overwhelmed and do nothing. Or if I am not on time with the tasks I get stressed and blame myself for not being efficient enough. By watching your videos I had a period in which i was happy for doing even 5 mins of a task just to not feel awful everytime but i went back to the roots :( This video was helpful!
So true, the more you focus on being as productive as possible, the less you will be able to do just one thing and get really good at it. The fact is that we really don't have enough time in our days because we literally don't have enough time in the day to do the amount of things we put on our plate... so we have to prioritize. And inevitably, when we prioritize, we have to make sacrifices.
so I've come to this conclusion a while ago... yet, I've never found the strength to step out of my "efficiency" mindset. I think having depression definitely makes it harder but... the satisfaction of getting multiple things done at once makes me feel proud. Sometimes it is as stupid as like brushing my teeth while showering or drawing while in class, and plotting out my novel. or even now... commenting while listening to the video. Or listening to lectures, listening to music, writing my notes, and opening my essay for jotting notes down.
What if you try timing 2 task individually and then compare it to when you multitask? I know this is pretty ridiculous, but timing your shower + brushing teeth vs doing it both at once. Or maybe eating (just focusing on eating, not speedrun it) and watching something after you finish the meal and need some time to digest it. Most of the time i find that what we think as "multi task" dont actually matter and doing it individually yields same result and could be safer. Obviously this doesnt always apply, like cooking need certain multitask so it doesnt take too long, but usually its a very simple task weaved between a big main task (cooking rice, or steam something)
@@Crustee0cooking should ideally not take that much multi tasking I find that cooking is way more fun (and the French would agree with me they have a whole name for it and teach it in culinary school) if you prepare everything in advance, from then on its just simply following one step after the other. (Besides simple stuff like throwing pasta in the pot or getting it out while making the sauce in a pan)
Male, 28. ADHD on Vyvanse. Today I had one of my rare hyperfocus states. I made breakfast, then wrote down a checklist, in order of priority, with tasks to work through. I started smashing things out and ticking boxes. It felt AMAZING. I realise after watching this that the difference wasn't how focused I was, or how efficient I was being. It was the fact that I was able to focus on prioritising and knocking down my tasks/dominoes one at a time! I hope I can take this lesson on and have more days that feel this productive.
This is one reason why assigning tasks to time slots can be effective. Dr k's breakdown is helpful because life doesn't always go according to plan but we can still apply the same principles of prioritization
Interestingly enough in business being efficient meant not doing extraneous thing. As in actually giving up on something. In his management book Drucker mentioned that the best way to cut cost is to not do it at all. Most business instead of cutting the inefficient part of their operation prefer to find best way to do it without willing to give up anything which makes it harder for them to grow. Even Steve Job mentioned that deciding on what not to do is as important as deciding what should be done. Thank you for this video Dr. K I am having hard time and feel overwhelmed a lot and I am realising that every time I did not try to be efficient I got more work done even though each works take a lot of time. Because I am focusing on that one task alone and feels in line with myself. Although even though I knew that I still have a lot of fear about not being efficient and keep ending up with same mistake over and over again. I hope I can get better from now on.
For me, my ADHD goes very well with my wind style motivation ( I don't remember the term for it, I just remember the explaination of it in an older Dr k video ) and I've learned that I perform best the more distractions I have. For example, in school, I'd be listening to the lecture, doing the classwork, listening to music/watching RU-vid, and playing hearthstone, all at once. Straight A's and B's. If I had to focus on one thing at once, instant D
I think this also ties into why my ability to develop new skills stops at step 1, because I keep trying to learn and practice all the factors at once and get perfect in one fell swoop. I don't feel comfortable saying "Forget 9/10 of the things I need to know about playing guitar, stay crap at them for now, and just practice fretting-hand muting", instead feeling like I need to be good as soon as possible
I felt this haha I’ve always had an easy time learning new things but for some reason I always hyper fixate in perfecting it before practicing “further”, I’m trying to break free of this habit but it’s almost ingrained in my system.
I noticed this many many years ago, it's the reason I stopped posting on socials in any routine. I was losing my mind trying to appease all the comments and thinking about "the next thing" or response. It was tearing me apart, and my real life was falling apart too... again. I've learned to prioritize my efficiency list first, then STOP. Then begin to tackle ONE thing on the list. DO NOT even think about the other things. So much better.
Finally, after a few years of watching in RU-vid, i finally watched this video without reading comments, just full screen and active listening (focusing on one thing)
Great timing, dr. K. As someone who is studying to get in a university while has to do a lot of freelance, making sure I'm getting money enough to pay my stuff and such, things can overwhelm you pretty fast. Your example on doing multiple things at the same time resonates so much with me, sometime I even study while i'm in the bus, than listen to this documentary while working because its important, even not being able to rest because I go immediately to socials; Another thing that I started doing is that, to do the exam I have to read like 6 books so I started listening to audiobook while in the shower... We often do that to save time, but burns us out a lot. I'll try my best to focus and do just one thing at a time. Thank you.
Thanks I have adhd and a lot of people around me say I have insane willpower. Because I was able to quit a lot of light addictions cold turkey (video games addiction, eating unhealthy food ...) and I can resist them completly. But I wasn't good at beeing productive. And now I realised trying to be efficent was my problem. Often I spended the day trying to find the most efficent way of doing something because I thought it would me help later on. And my brain got burned out by thinking about all the thinks I have to do
I was just thinking about this earlier today. For people with ADHD, a lot of the time the way we naturally do something is inefficient (and in particular often quite nonlinear, going back and forth between things instead of taking a streamlined path between steps), but it will get done and done WELL if we're left to do it that way. But if someone demands that we do it the "right" way then it suddenly becomes much more difficult to complete the task and it will probably be done much more poorly. I very often find myself thinking "don't question my methods" when I think of how somebody might criticize the way I do something
Synchronicities are telling me that I need not worry about all the things I can’t do in the span of my weekend by accomplishing multiple at once, and to do what I can do today, in this moment and get that done before going to the next thing. Priorities show where we can truly care. ✨
This is interesting because i realised watching this that my mindset on the definition of efficiency has shifted recently. I’ve come to view “efficient” as focusing on one thing at a time and multi-tasking as inefficient, which led me to be somewhat confused by your definition of efficiency at the beginning! But when I reflected I realised that I did also equate multitasking with being efficient in the past. That said, me realising this is one thing but putting it into practice quite another!
Dr. K, I’m having a pleasant moment of gratitude about you. You have really helped me within the last 5 years. Through covid, through some tough times too. Very thankful you’re here today and helping so many people in their life long mental health journey. :)
I feel this as an artist. I want to put down and make every idea I have, but I end up sketching alot but not really ever finishing anything. It's really hard to like, not ride on that "in the zone" moment w/ art n just sketch out everything escpecially if u dont wanna forget it... i wish i had more finished art pieces to share tho. Every single art piece I make I feel as tho it has potential to be smth great, but I never spend enough time w/ it to reach that level. I am afraid of losing my ideas for the sake of a finished piece.. but well, I guess I should start learning how 2 prioritize.
this is so interesting... as someone living with constant pain and frequent anxiety, i often use audiobooks and videos to distract my mind enough to initiate chores and simple tasks, but watching this made me realize how once i get started, i often get frustrated that I've zoned out and missed something; sometimes i have to back up and replay a segment multiple times... I need the distraction from pain and spinnies to start things, but I wanna try letting the diversion go when i notice I'm not paying attention to it
The el tatva abhyasa technique is about focusing your attention while doing your unimportant or trivial or routine works/tasks. Don't multitask during those things and try to remain focused during those tasks. It's the same technique taught by Dandapani as Daily Focus Rituals. Try focus on one thing at a time during eating meals, walking, etc.
Thank you 🙏🏼 I actually stopped myself from reading the comments as the video was playing and just focused on what you were saying. For my past job as a bartender for 30+ years I was always multitasking and rushing and running around trying to remember many multiples of things while also ordering the tasks in my head to be able to get them done in an efficient amount of time just so I could get even more multitasking done! 😅😓😔 Honestly I believe for doing this for so long that it has greatly affected my mental health.
Rave comment with an existential question you probably cannot answer at the end: Dr. K, you make so much sense, and your content is so timely (really spot on and I am certain you put a lot of work into that) re: big things facing us in this time. You come across as compassionate and highly empathetic (ie excellent RU-vid bedside manner!) while also confidently intelligent. Existential question: Your video makes sense, and I know following your recommendation will be helpful, but there is a monster out there bigger than us as individuals (society - at least those that value capitalism and competition where no amount of wealth is enough) that has come to expect efficiency over prioritization. And we can only control ourselves, right? I can take your guidance (and will try) and be better for it, but unless there is a collective buy-in - like society level - some of this seems unattainable. Ex. I think success is attainable for managing tasks in my personal life. Professionally, I would be in trouble (I’m in healthcare). Employers in my profession (industry wide attitude) have actually set things up so that multi-tasking /efficiency is required, no prioritization - all things must be done and perfectly at that. If you do not there is a target on your back. If you succeed…..it’s kind of like your brain/greed scenario but played out by a group: they add more while also cutting the help you have. I am sure there are other pockets of society/industries where this conundrum exists and as individuals, we feel we cannot control it. So, billion dollar question, how can we collectively convince society to value prioritization (and also a job well done) over the efficiency machine?
Honestly, I think it requires urgency related to an existential threat. In first world countries, life has gotten to a point where nothing is urgent except for getting the number on an account to go up faster than it goes down. On a societal level, examples of urgency would include the black death, the crusades, the world wars, the great depression, risk of nuclear war... These things all lead to prioritization over efficiency. COVID might fit the bill, but not to the same extent. I think Climate Change is the real one above all things that might actually be able to shift culture back to a priority mindset.
Bet they're just being idealistic for the sake of micromanaging. Unless it pays really really well, it's not like other employees think it's possible/worthy enough to fulfill all demands.
@@letsreadtextbook1687 Its more that we never have enough workers they loose workers or changes positions with out replacements. So they have one person doing multiple different jobs and when stuff doesn't get done they complain that we aren't being productive enough, But that's because we can't prioritize, and end up being run all over our department doing several different tasks because they want two people doing a task that takes 4. What is worse is business has only increased, our store is making more money then it ever has, and we are closer then ever to having departments with 0 workers. But yes its a sort of unquenchable idealism that believes they can squeeze every dollar out of their labor. Sense they don't have any other ideas to make more money and bring in more sales. Other then eventually just replace us with machines, little do they know machines are like they want are really hard to make dependable.
Having a micro Manager, struggling with your mental health for months after a very painful breakup, led me to not being able to focus and now, I’m behind projects and that’s leading to more anxiety overall. For anyone out there that is struggling, be gentle on yourself. That’s what my therapist tells me at the end of each session. Thanks Dr. Kay for the space and wisdom.
Dr. Ks Timing are really superb! Amazing really and it doesn’t matter if people don’t get the right timing since the video is already uploaded, anyone who stumbles upon the video are people who are dealing with such similar issues thus, granted us AOE healing over time. Ofc and a huge Thank Q for Dr.K and the community!
As someone with ADHD, I find it is easier for me to stay engaged in some activities if I'm listening to an audiobook or music. Specifically, exercise. I could end up accidentally taking a nap if I lay down to do abs, and I also get distracted when I'm changing from one exercise to another. But if I'm listening to music or something I like, that gives me something to stay focus while I transition. Other than that I agree with everything else, it's important to understand that prioritizing means letting go of some stuff rather than trying to fit a 40hour work week before lunch. As always, I really enjoyed your content. Both your YT videos and your guide to mental health. I like that it allows me to analyze the approaches I'm taking in life, and to decide if I'm okay with how I'm doing or if there's something new I would like to try to continue to make progress :)
While watching the video my mind floated away 90% of the time. I basically hear a random phase and that's it I'm thinking about something completely different until I realize I need to get back to the video and have to play back the whole thing like a hundred times.
When the title of a video alone can make me groan and go "shuuuut. the fuuuck. uuuuuuuup" as if I already know that what you are about to say is going to feel like a direct attack on my character, I know it's going to be good. Wonderfully cogent video. Thank you Dr. K!
I don’t understand how you aren’t much more popular. Your content is very well structured and you word things very well. Thank you for your time and effort.
Whenever I try to prepare food for myself, I fall victim to the efficiency trap and I try to overlap every part of the cooking process just because my mind is attached to this idea of saving 10-20 minutes on preparation time. What I don't realize until after I'm done is that doing it this way creates a huge mess, and having so much to clean up overwhelms me and causes me to put off doing it until late in the night, thus actually costing me more time than I thought I would have saved. I think of this as a perfect microcosm for the relentless search for efficiency, and as a great example of seeing instantly how the pursuit of efficiency is generally not worth it. Thanks for making this video, as it put a lot into perspective for me.
Dr. K, you are so cool! You gave so many tips to handle the anxiety and stress. I literally started doing a lot of things because of what you said in other videos. For me journaling (which I started after seeing your video) is where I give up on things. This helps me prioritize. But, few question. 1. How to deal with FOMO, for example if I am in an industry where I can leverage all the latest innovation, but I get blended in crowd, but I feel I can stand out, how to deal with such stuff? 2. How to prevent becoming a zombie? Sometime, I can't help but go into zombie mode. I noticed it when I have some awful task as my next priority. I don't like being a zombie at all. (Like youtube, shorts, reddit etc.)
I've always been generally against multitasking. As an artist/craftperson, it is antithetical, even, to skillful production. There are occasions when it can be useful, but intuitively it felt off to me, unnatural, like much of the common advice/wisdom of the day, an idea that has been foisted upon us by the world as an ideal or superior mode of being.
The video discusses the challenges of focusing our minds, specifically how the pursuit of efficiency is a significant cause of a scattered mind. In our quest for efficiency, we often multitask, trying to juggle multiple responsibilities simultaneously. While efficiency generally has a positive connotation, it inadvertently allows our minds to remain greedy. Instead of letting go of tasks and setting priorities, we try to fit more tasks into a limited timeframe. This constant chase for efficiency means that we never truly prioritize. Real prioritization involves letting go of certain tasks in favor of others. However, with the mentality of efficiency, we attempt to handle everything, leading to a greedy mind that refuses to relinquish any task. A prime example is how people often can't remove items from their to-do lists. This resistance to letting go and the attempt to be ever more efficient leads to a feeling of being overwhelmed, scattered, and spread too thin. The same concept is observed in online dating, where people list multiple requirements, looking for perfection and refusing to prioritize or let go of any criteria. Ironically, our ambition to accomplish everything results in achieving very little. The more we try to focus on multiple tasks, the more scattered our attention becomes, hindering our ability to complete even a single task effectively. Consequently, the solution lies in moving away from extreme efficiency and understanding the importance of letting go and prioritizing. When our minds are singularly focused on a task without the burden of juggling countless responsibilities, we tend to be more productive. It's crucial to recognize these moments of true productivity and understand that they stem from a mind free from the pressures of multitasking and extreme efficiency. It's in these instances that we need to embrace the act of letting go, setting clear priorities, and focusing on one task at a time.
This last year has been very unfortunate and unlucky for me. In a 12 month period from today, a year ago my grandmother who was my second mom, passed away at 65 from a blood clot. About 4 months later her sister passed away at 59 from grief, she got ill and intentionally allowed herself to die from severe depression. About a month ago my grandfather also died, my car broke down and is essentially non repairable, and about 4 days ago i found out i may be homeless. My father lost his job and im living with him while trying to finish my engineering degree. Since all of my remaining family in arizona has died and my mother is homeless, i legitimately have no where to go. With the current economy im not so confident in how its going to play out since its actually quite difficult to pay for utilities, a new vehicle, and an apartment even if i began working immediately, but who knows. Luckily i started ssri treatment two months ago and im honestly not distraught or upset about any of it. In fact i find it kind of funny, i feel like im in an adam sandler movie, especially after the door knob broke off from the sliding door yesterday. Yeah idk... Oh well, i hope that everything is going well for the rest of ya
"Luckily i started ssri treatment two months ago and im honestly not distraught or upset about any of it." sounds about right.. ssris are basically emotional numbing pills
A question that I had while watching this video, what about putting yourself on a schedule? Like planning to do activity A for a set amount of time, then switching over to Activity B for a set time, then Activity C, etc. A lot of what I do is scheduled activities, so the rest of my life tends to get scheduled as well. I feel like I shouldn't be stressed, but sometimes I do if unexpected events come up. Then I have to reschedule everything, and even drop some things!
for me, focus means something completely different, I actually feel like I can focus if I fill my brain with multiple things at once, because the void left by doing one thing is going to make me have ADHD and do other things and that will make my brain actually short circuit because of the FOMO of not able to finish the things that I can't get my attention on. So the trick isn't being less efficient, but instead I tell myself, that there is an opportunity cost of FOMO if I don't get the major thing I'm working on done, instead of the other things that I could've, but this doesn't mean I only do one thing at a time, I can still e.g. listen to Dr. K while eating, or talk to something while reading an article, etc. My brain work better if I can alternate materials quickly and go back and forth instead of just one thing only.
This video is so well timed. Im on a trip and I leave tomorrow. I dont want to go home yet, Im crying in the hotel and Im imagining my boring, small life. This city is so vast and exciting. My life, however small, is so stressful -- being stuck in the daily motions is agonizing. I just want to enjoy the beach. I feel like my cells are dying, I feel like my stomach's pit is eating me alive. It's a trembling, overwhelming feeling, like Im an animal clawing at doors and walls to refuse being dragged back in. Its so dramatic but its how it feels right now in my emotions. Im so scared to stay in that same cycle
I came to a conclusion about multitasking a few months ago that basically, if you can multitask, it doesn't mean you should always. I see many people saying that they normally do many things at once, as if they got skills, but many fail to prioritize and tilts when facing something that need focus. I've been trying to not multitask when it's not necessary, lowering my stress levels to things that should be simple and reserving energy for when it is really needed.
This is basically the in-depth version of me asking a friend how to get better at strategy games/RTS and his response being to focus on one aspect at a time otherwise you overwhelm yourself. Thanks for the video
Then part of efficiency is the need to accomplish a more important task while keeping the more fun one off to the side. And then while doing something important I cannot focus on that instead my mind wandering around thinking about 5 different things. And then I end up forgetting everything if I happen to be studying moments after going away from it. It's been so frustrating to me in my life because of how important this education is for me.
I’ve always known for myself I’d rather prioritize than be efficient, and I don’t stretch myself thin. Sometimes that means goals can take longer to achieve, but the end product is higher quality. For instance, I know people who take 7 courses a term in university and get meh grades in all because they are maximizing efficiency at the cost of prioritizing grades. I do the opposite and have a healthy GPA and now have been working in two different labs for the last year. Sometimes slow and steady wins the race. 📈
My mind is very scattered. But I think the level of focus can also depend on the activities that you're doing. For example, if you run or work out at the gym, you can listen to music or podcast. So not listening to them is an option. But it's different when you do something that requires 100% of your focus. For example, I do BJJ, and when I roll, it's impossible to do other things, I have to focus on rolling. It's even hard to think about other things when someone tries to choke me out. So besides training our minds to focus, you can also do activities where 100% focus is required not an option.
I feel this especially with work these days, and I feel at least for me, that I need to intepret what efficiency is for what I do. It's not how many things I accomplish out of a checklist. It's how well I am able to achieve the things I needed to accomplish, and that means prioritizing the tasks at hand and having to let go of some things (like being very active in everything the team is working on due to FOMO) to be able to focus on the larger tasks which I have already taken myself to working on.
some tips that worked for me for ek tatva abyas (specifically using my phone less): I charge my phone overnight, i won't unplug my phone in the morning until I absolutely NEED to (like when I get in my car to drive away), this creates a specific window of time for me to wake up, make breakfast, and go to the bathroom without touching it once (sometimes i have to take a book with me into the bathroom lol). Another thing is that if I don't NEED my phone when I'm going somewhere or running an errand, I'll leave my phone in the car, making it impossible to accidentally spend time on it when I'm out (grocery shopping, going for a hike, etc.) I do a lot of hiking/nature walking these days and its been wonderful knowing i don't have my phone on me, i don't need it.
I have actualy gotten this hunch recently where I notice that it's easier to focus on studying after I spend free time on one focused, slow pacing thing. But when my mind has to race and multitask for the free time activity, it's hard to focus on only doing the studying.
I agree!! We need to prioritize- I think it takes practice to fully get what takes priority over other things in our life. I’ll really try to be kind to myself if I choose the wrong priority
I've noticed that when I try to learn everything in detail instead of the key points/basic stuff that I should be prioritizing to pass the exam, it's more time consuming and I end up only finishing half of the material that I should be reviewing. It's my inability to let go of stuff and perfectionism. It's also not efficient since my mind is in a rush, filled with all the things I should do instead of giving a sufficient amount of time to actually study the material
7:10 Literally me, playing videogames. Everytime i've done something good/right and performed at my best, i always want to step it up, but it always just ended with screwing up. That's actually why i'm here.
(Note for myself) 0:50 - the big cause of the scattered mind is the pursuit of efficiency 1:37 - efficiency example 2:21 - when we are efficient, we allow the mind to remain greedy 2:51 - efficiency allows us to not prioritize 6:42 - think about your own efficiency 7:02 - just focused on one thing 7:43 - the way you accomplished so much is because you don't think about the 100 things you have to do, you're just thinking about one, and you finish it fast the more we focus on efficiency --> the less we are willing to prioritize --> the less we are willing to giving up, we are facilitating a greedy mind that doesn't have to give anything up --> our focus becomes scattered --> don't perform well 9:30 - ek tatva abhyas = focusing on one thing at a time, by doing this your mind has to give things up, practice getting rid of efficiency Practicing ek tatva abhyas(one state focus practice) 1- no mobile in bathroom or toilet 2- eating without listening or watching from device 3-staying as silent as realistically possible while eating 4-gymming without music or audiobook 5- walking in nature or anywhere without earphone or listening music 6-working without distraction of music, internet (if possible) or social media 7-giving full attention to your loved one with no distraction of tv, phone etc (Ofcourse where it’s needed) 8-enjoying music or song without multitasking
The trick that worked for me was thinking of intense negativity and intense positivity as equally unreasonable and stupid. Because they both are, essentially pointless... all intense negativity is, is more easy to subtly fall into. That doesn't make it somehow smarter. So cool, I have this unjustifiable silly perspective and all the reasons for embracing it reasoned out. Why not just leap over to the other stupid positive version of unjustifiable perspective since it requires the exact same reasoning? Worked extraordinarily well/am now thoroughly pointlessly positive instead of thoroughly pointlessly negative. Shout out to De Beauvoir and Camus for the assist.
I was in the middle of eating my lunch when I pulled up this video to watch and felt immediately called out as soon as he mentioned to not do things like watching videos while eating a meal 😂 I took the advice though! I finished my meal, then watched the video, and waited until the end to write a comment 💪
What you're saying: Give up efficiency. What you actually mean: Give up mental multitasking. To me, efficiency means solving something in a shorter timeframe and achieving the same results. It's not about doing many things at once because it proves to be inefficient.
How odd that this morning I decided to do my 3d art without lostening to music or having some audio on the side and Ive gotten more done today than I have in two weeks. Then stumble onto this video. Certainly works.
That's completely right 😂😂. Right now I'm cooking, eating and listening to doctor k, and I enjoy no one of those. Sure it is efficient and in one hour I will do much more stuff and do all of those separated, but you are not focused on what are you doing, and not Enjoying it. Also is just not sustainable to do it everyday.
Oooh so thats why I seem to get so much done in 1-2 30-45 mins. Of focus Work every other day for 8 weeks rather than do it everyday for 30 mins. Only. Aand I dont feel burned out Thank you for sharing this and asnswering so many questions I have
i wish i watchted this video thsi morning smh i wasted a whole day being anxious about stuff i gotta do within the next 2 days thanks for the video man
Hi Dr K, thanks so much for your life altering content! Can you please make a video on how to talk less as an extrovert? I’m a great listener but I also talk too much in conversations and I’m losing my audience. I’m a very curious and bubbly person, passionate about lots of topics and I get carried away. I know too well the power of listening and yet I can’t stop myself from talking. Any insights would really help! Thanks a millions and blessings your way! ✨
Side topic, the Einsenhower method works for some ppl. Urgent and important - do it asap. Urgent but unimportant - delegate it. Important but not urgent - carefully schedule (and mark where and how and with whom! ideally). Unimportant and non-urgent - goes to the trash or at most bottom of the list.
When the pandemic hit, I was still maintaining a todo list.. but somehow during the pandemic it started growing faster than I could finish it off (sometimes even because of other people's lack of support). I tried to keep up regardless and managed to run right into a burnout only 3 months into the pandemic. I decided to throw out the todo list altogether and I haven't looked back ever since :-)
Random thought, probably irrelevant to the video, but when you gave example of efficiency as "packing more things into one" and then put multitasking as an example, what I thought of, rather, is either doing something that, under right circumstances, furthers several goals at once (as in, one task is efficient to be done in order to advance several causes), or, alternatively, doing something with a reusable outcome and/or on template. So, for example, developing a code for your software, that you can easily reuse in further projects instead of creating a wheel over and over again; which you can expand on, you just don't have to re-create the base of it over and over. So, in my eyes, efficiency might be three things: multitasking, working on a task with several purposes, reusing past work in a modular manner. These aren't even mutually exclusive, so in theory, you can do all three at the same time, though I failed to provide any example for the second case (which, on itself, arguably similar to the third).
THANK YOU DR. K!! You have changed my life more than you know. I am ultimately grateful for all your content. I hope your whole team and you can sleep at night easy knowing you have definitely saved a life. ❤
I did not expect that Online Dating Parallel, it's actually pretty accurate.. Well besides one thing, i thought too that if i just make my priorities known it would make people feel at ease and more likely to swipe and interact, that if i make a simple to fall thru pipe line but is a legitimate priority so it does take people out of my pool. it turns out the very act of doing such a thing on a online space makes you look desperate. "It's not Normal to do that, it shows the opposite of humility." ~Or so i think.. I've seen girl profiles do that and they were incredibly off putting statements, who would want a date that out right states to swipe left if you're below 6ft and sometimes even drop a really odd insult to the public, calling people "Kids" as a derogatory term, kind of telling of who you matching with on a regular basis and insult as kids saying to stop matching her. The rare exceptions but they're the only ones doing it, nobody else shows their priority and absolutely none does it in a positive manner where it's not a bloody everything or none statement. The example just got to my head because in my experience making things stream lined in that sense actually hurts your image. On second thought, i wonder is wanting to be efficient still in play in what i just described ?
I’ve noticed most work environments enforce the opposite of prioritization, and stretch everyone thin, try to add more tasks to everyones plate and the only solution to these work environments is to be “efficient”, but it has a direct cost on the quality of work being done, and the communication between colleagues and ability to work in a sustainable long term way (i.e. leads to burnout).
