My experience has been that because of "seeing potential" in others yet they never wanted/couldn't rise to this expectation I forced on them - These relationships lasted far past their expiration date and I I forfeited my boundaries. And has caused a lot of pain for myself. I am actively working out how I want to fulfill my need of social interaction/inclusion. And also enforcing my personal boundaries (this has been a challenge lately). Wenzes you are steady kindly pushing us to the next mountain top and I am here for it! Thank you for growing and expanding - we all are benefiting from you still saying yes to your path.
And please know that if someone doesn't respect those boundaries, it shows they aren't healthy for you to have around. That's the POINT of having boundaries. 😮
Thank you - I just find it so hard when I am having to do it with nearly everyone I know- husband, grown up children, friends relatives - didn't realise they were all walking all over me!
Its difficult for us. Seems we encourage others to not respect us by being nice thinking were doing the right thing. And they often crap all over us. Its like we have to practice and memorize what to say beforehand to protect ourselves from cutting remarks. Just let a friend go of several years who was a cronic flake and would either not show, or change his mind at the last min and got aggressive when I draw the line. I demanded he give me a 15 sec text if things changed, and he just blamed me, so I blocked everything. I think the trick is to only be friends with the few who are willing to respect our boundries. If not block them, they are not worth it. Perhaps theirs a better way but I have not found it so set those boundries and make others respect them or else.
Still you have to think: what's the point in all of this. You will go through 99 people for maybe 1 person to connect and benefit something maybe. Most of the world is sensory, materialistic, present moment driven.
The irony is Wenzes is an ESFP, SeTe convergence is obvious. The ESFP propels themselves into the future due to their NiFi divergent pairing. I had to break it but humans are complex creatures you can't state that statistically most people are materialistic etc as everyone is multifaceted. I'm sure Wenzes makes a tidy sum from her not so ethical bootcamps.
@@AnyaAnnika67You’re nasty and you leave nasty comments. Why do you even waste your time leaving comments? Are you that unhappy with your life that you have to take it online to make yourself shine? Did Wenzes do something bad to you? Coz she has made me aware of so many things and I’m so grateful for this. It is definitively you who is not an INFJ so whatever she says does not resonate with you, you have no idea what she’s talking about. Maybe you took MBTI test and the result was INFJ but you did not answer honestly and answered how you wanted to answer. Anyways, stop your nastiness.
I can relate to the first reason. I've always allowed people to be themselves, even as far back when I was a kid. I just accepted people. I think that's why I've also struggled with friendships and relationships in my life because I've been accepting of others while others have not been so accepting of me. I can relate to the thirst for knowledge, as well. Whether that was when I was into reading about the universe and cosmology or when I got really interested in acting, drama, theater, screenwriting, it's like I had to watch so many webinars and do challenges and just learn as much as I can.
I relate to this, too. I always allowed my friends or family to be themselves around me, but eventually I ended up being the only one who isn't allowed to be herself. I had a lot of unsuccessful friendships in the last ten years...
Happened to me as a kid too. Accepted others, but a lot of them didnt accept me. Ended up hanging out with the bad kids. Funny how they were more accepting than the "good kids".
I never thought of it like that before, that we project our potential onto others. I've done that in the past, seeing someone being so talented at music and songwriting and thinking, hey, if we collab together, maybe we will become great friends and tour and stuff, but then realized that they didn't take songwriting, music and art as seriously as I do.
As did Wenzes, spoken like a true ESFP. SeTe is all about this performative element & NiFi divergence propels an idealised archetype of the self into the future 😊. Definitely not the cognition of an INFJ.
While INFJs excel at seeing the potential in others, it's not necessarily the case that others don't see potential in them. However, because INFJs often focus more on supporting and nurturing others, their own potential may sometimes be overlooked or undervalued by those around them. This can be particularly true in environments where their unique strengths, such as creativity and intuition, may not be fully appreciated or understood.
We live in a very shallow world where typicals only judge success and see potential by what they watch on TV, materialism, and what others typicals may have. They don't have the ability to see others potential.
can u make a video about the shadow side of INFJ's. all the YT content seems to be painting us about chosen angel geniuses and im curious about the way they INJS can destroy or sabotage.
4 месяца назад
Lacking boundary was a big one for me most of my life until i really saw and worked on it.
I'm not speaking for Wenzes but from my observation - our shadow expression is unique - We self sabotage by being a martyr - not expressing out authentic selves - When we hollow ourselves out to make room for others energies is a classic sign you are self sabotaging as and INFJ - Wenzes has made several videos with these themes intertwined - don't know if one particular video(s) is named this
If this is my calling for now so be it. Somehow I get ppl talking. With a nudge. I don't say much and other people will talk for hours. I just sit back and listen. Kinda fun It's kind of a strategy to vet others to see if I can let others in my world by watching how others interact. So far not alot of others have been truly welcomed.
All valid information, I've realized that it's more important that others are able to see their potential. Oftentimes others have become conditioned and reliant on leaning on others for support, negating their sovereignty. It's also common to hear them comparing themselves or putting themselves down and even lying about it. Pointing these things out to them (helping) just gets negative feedback. Ideally they want someone to grow beside them but that means we INFJs have to dumb ourselves down from the start of meeting them. 😅
I just got out of a four year relationship and kept setting boundaries kept setting boundaries and the person was a habitual line stepper. This content was right on time. Had to choose me. I would rather be alone than have to deal with that mess. Thanks for all you do.!!
INFJ tends to be empathic, and it makes it hard to set boundaries when you take in all that energy, and it tends to attract some dark stuff to us, too. We don't always get people on their best behavior. 😢
Thank you so much Wenzes ❤️ this video saved me today- I was so miserable & fed up with seeing other's potential and trying to help them to be their best self and no one being able to understand my motives. I didn't intend to wallow, just the reality hit me today and I couldn't shake it off
The information you presented here is so helpful and applicable to my life. I walked away from a friendship that was eating me up on the inside, one where I didn’t have proper boundaries, one where I was a member of the supporting cast for the superstar, and now I’ve been busy editing my book and enjoying my hobbies while taking a break from trying to be nice and to be everyones best friend.
Honestly, I think the world would be a much better place if roles were allocated according to Myers Briggs types. Selfless, perceptive, comprehending INFJS the leaders. Other types the enforcers, the doers, all in their field of strength. A lot of the trouble in the world flows from people not staying in their metaphorical lane but dominating where they are not strong.
You're describing personality facets that have nothing to do with cognitive type. Indeed Wenzes is a cognitive ESFP not an INFJ. The INFJ is an abstract cerebral philosopher first & foremost & NiTi is ironically Wenzes blindspot. I mean this with no disrespect to Wenzes as we all have blindspots. Any COGNITIVE type can be caring, selfless etc. I suggest looking at Cognitive Personality Theory to get an accurate depiction of the INFJ & ESFP respectively. You describe Wenzes as perceptive but this would make sense in that you share the same cognitive wiring. I do see abstract cerebral perceptiveness at all in Wenzes content in fact it's notably lacking she's more often than not ascribing ubiquitous behavioural stereotypes to people & her understanding of Jungian cognition is poor.
I call myself a "philosophical and theoretical mystic" and a "practicing skeptic." Although I wouldn't be classified as being "clairvoyant," I understand how this could come across that way too people who are surprised by our insight into things. You're right about it being a gift that needs to be protected. I like to see the potential in others which is a big help to me as a teacher. I'm basically retired, but I do some substitute teaching and I try to look for potential in the kids. A lot of times I'll only see them only once, but I've often been able to give kids of different ages some useful input. I'm sure our intuition helps a lot. Now that I'm older, I am working out of the firm conviction that I'm helping a lot of people, and some of it I may not even know about at this point. But after living out my own reality and growing in confidence (much of what has been confirmed to me by your videos) it's a good feeling to know that I am most likely helping a lot of people. #4 was thought-provoking. We project our potential on the others. The way I try to communicate this is by communicating (sometimes silently) "I have grown, and 😊feel optimistic that you can, too, even if your way isn't exactly like mine"
I don't even tell people I'm psychic but I still get downloads I sometimes word vomit. Sometimes i dont because i hate attention. I always tell people "I only know what I'm told, and I'm not told much." I've been asked by my sister before, "what are you?" My other sister has somewhat of a relative intuition that resonates with my own and strengthens both so she gets it. When I was 13yo I was sat down by my mom and grandma and asked if I was the anti christ. Of course I'm not but religious people freak out with the slightest inkling of the supernatural. I told my s.o. it was going to rain and he was telling me the weather man said it says 0%. It was raining within min. So now the other day when he was saying the storm was going to go around us based on the weather man and I told him no its about to hit right now and get inside. He listened quickly and didn't argue. Sure enough as soon as he stepped inside we were hit with a flash flood that had 60mph wind.
Hey Wenzes! As a long time sub, I just wanted to say that I have been loving most of your videos since the beginning of the year 2024. Your new take on old topics / main INFJ themes is actually very refreshing and your experience in understanding the INFJ in depth, really stands above most (if not all) of what I have seen out there. It's just so on point, your repeted insistance on certain key phrases and behaviors is appreciated. I still look forward to see you take it all to the next level over time! I cannot wait for a book from yourself. I'd love it if you go in depth, especially associating the INFJ personality with some key concepts in psychology. I'll throw a few examples to illustrate my point. Associations between INFJs and: - Codependency - the 4F responses (Fight / Flight / Freeze / Fawn) - our Inner Child - shadow dynamics common to INFJs (savior complex, codependent, our projection of understanding others because that is ultimately also what we want for ourselves, etc...) - somatic practices, reconnecting to our body and to the S (sensing) environment - Reowning our anger, reconnecting to it healthily rather than our famous passive aggressive doorslams. - Parts work (such as Internal Family Systems or archetypes / subpersonalities) All of those are linked and just a few examples and you do touch upon them of course. But damn, I'd love to read a book of yours some day, associating the main concepts in psychology with your specific understanding of INFJ. Thanks, much love to you all!!
As for rule one, we can only let them be vulnerable if we keep up our intent of ‘no harm, ever’. But this also means tHe other person needs to see you as never having any teeth. So the others need to stay in a one-up status
I have learned that I have been mired in this projection thing. But, very much due to my deep diving into Wenzes, I was able to halt “it” just this week. No other channel on RU-vid is more valuable & valued, for me, than this one right here, right now. I took the step of purchasing a webcam, microphone, & ring light kit “Bet on YOURSELF!”
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6:31 peace, safety and personal vision are essential for the extraordinary infj life with the Fi critic, Te trickster and Si demon functions. We just project wrongly and naively thinking things just work out with our input
Dear Lord, give me the wisdom to do the things You put me on this earth to do in a way that pleases You and serves the women and children You have given me to serve.
I’m literally clairvoyant as much as that makes me feel like a pillock for saying so, but it’s true and it’s not a social interrogation thing, it’s literally clairvoyant. MBTI tests give either INFP, INFJ or ENTJ so making assessment on personality on these categories is of course on a spectrum, but I know what I know and I know that at many times in my life I have know the future and so it has come to pass over 40 odd years.
Only someone English would say pillock! I know what you meant by not wanting to sound boastful. I am a seer and INFJ so likewise want to say my truth in this safe environment without being seen to be a pillock, either! My family is English but I am Australian born, btw. 🇦🇺
I haven't watched this yet, but I definitely have a gift of clairvoyance. But here's the thing: I absolutely cannot live without my relationship w God. Some John 3:16 lady ❤
I keep on playing this video over and over again because I'm trying to gauge where is me and where is my [also an INFJ] boyfriend in this equation! It's so helpful to be reminded that I need to turn to myself as per video and it's interesting that I can see his potential. Curiously, I see myself through his potential. INFJ X2 romantic relationships is something else ((:
This is a sideplay on your normal lines. But it is the scientific kinds trying to play how they are important in the game and at least one INFJ playing the boundary games. The posturers like to play that they knew, got there first, won the game, and so it is "theirs". There is a kind of INFJ that knows the game that is about to about to go down, the breakthroughs that are going to happen. That then ask the existential questions of "Is this good?" "What if it is unregulated?" These kind of INFJs do not jump to the front of intellectual self-aggrandisement "it came through our feed!" Instead, they ponder the ethics and significances of the potential unfolding discoveries and how they should be played out. Science might be the artery. But it is the imagination and heart that see what is possible and envisage what could be. Science becomes the artery where the visionary meets the scientific to create a structure that requires and arterial flow to make it happen and sustain the system. Engineers use science and can tell you what is and is not possible within current engineering, physics, and mathematical parameters. Scientists see what the engineers could do, but there is a deficit in suitable materials or techniques to make it a reality. Visionaries, philosophers, and dreamers paint the visions and boundaries of what could be, should be, would be, if only. They do not just explore technology and breakthroughs for the "great profit" or the "great extermination". They envisage how technology and concepts could be used for sustainable, fractal development and growth. The truly visionary, understanding the scope and potential of their ideas then dovetailing them with emotional and social intelligence so that profit and technology are rolled out with disregard for consequence or accountability. Sometimes those "slower" players are actually the great visionaries. Not just because they could see what could be. But because they understood the dangers and wanted to put in place guard rails so the aggressively cruel, corrupt, or greedy did not hijack into another mass genocide game play.. . .
I might even see the potential of every society in every country. The potential of the people in the whole world. I can feel through people, i know their problems. This isn't psychic ability or a superpower. Allah has granted and guided us the whole way.
