Zepla reacts to JoCat's (NOT) Crap FFXIV Melee DPS Guide 

It's kinda funny that JoCat is an Arcadium survivor

@@JL-GHK "Survivor"

only his Monster Hunter guide was a bit more crap, but after that he decided to make legit guides instead LOL

@@danilooliveira6580 Even his MH guides have some information that's useable.

@@jesternario Emphasis on some, considering his Charge Blade guide has like 5 seconds of useable information before its drowned out by overlapping voices. I almost wish he'd go back to make legit guides out of monster hunter, especially now that Rise Sunbreak is out.

Considering the speed he released the full version? I agree 100%

then he released the full song after getting the VA of Zenos to do a line

@@arkleuss WOT

@@christiantucker-allen7264 look up the full version of spooky slice. The voice actor of zenos made a line

I am with you, looking back at my muscle memory and he is rite, we put EVERY SINGLE COOLDOWN in 1 big burst then we just do the dagger combo until they come back lol

been playing NIN for 5 years now and i just found out about these not even a year ago 🙃

Fucking same. Mind blown indeed

Right there with you. Definitely learned something new today.

I noticed it pretty quick, except I still suck at the class.

I thought it was because the guides are secretly the shit.

yep. its the other Jo...

also maybe to show that they shouldn't be taken 100% seriously.

But also the joke is that the guides are really irreverent and jokey, so it looks and sounds like some BS to start with. It’s only after watching them and getting the context that you realize they come from a pretty well-informed perspective.

Same! I’m hoping this means physics and magic dps are up soon!

Skill floor

He's gotta remind the audience once in a while that the wiggler is in fact a villain and not nice 😆

"the guy whose dialogue doth ye skip"

@@alicelufenia3648 Spoilers :(

And he did it again on a Viewer who asked "1 insult please" he went Ultimate on him

She was gone too soon! 😢

Yeah I thought flank was south of the middle still

Little tip, the entirety of the rear/flank area counts for the positional, so what most people do is just stand right at the edge where rear/flank meet. That way when a rear comes up, you take one step to the left, and when a flank comes up you take one step to the right.

@@OkamiG15 That strat works as long as you have a tank which stays firmly planted, but if you don't you're gonna miss a lot of positionals. Well.... _would have_ missed a lot of positionals, last I checked they had already removed most of them and it wouldn't surprise me if the rest were gone by the time I came back.

For some reason my initial response to this is: Do not speak the deep lore to me, I was there when it was written.

what if his name is jocrap because he is the mascot of crap guides?

@@FiraDeviant then mascot'ing for the guides gives the CrapGuides a face and name to correspond to. These are the guides belonging to one Mr Crap.

@@vintolio also jo himself seems like a friendly, nice guy, so "jocrap" is his extreme comic persona, basically a video game Dom Mazzetti and for people who haven't been following jo(and you should) he started with weapon guides for monster hunter and did some clever ones for d&d too. i also thing that if you try to come off as super authoritative, people online nitpick you, but if you kind of joke on yourself up front, people are more likely to just enjoy your guides for what they are. so that helps take off the "well actually" edge from the less socialized members of the parsing community.

Except he's been doing "A Crap Guide" for DnD for years now, before he started FFXIV

You, Vintolio yt, you will be the one who will be the teller of Zepla.

WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN THE PARTY'S FULL HEALTH WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN THE PARTY'S FULL HEALTH OR EVEN HALFWAY UP AND STANDING DPS THE BAD GUYS!

don't forget "fighter-man"

@@kzorander8577 I legit sing that song under my breath whenever I play a healer in any game now. XD

Jocat is canonically a D&D Bard. We've seen it. Check out his D&D races video which he just raps it the entire time. Or his wizard guide where he sings all their schools of magic.

@@kzorander8577 NO, I DON'T PAY YOUR SUUUUUUUUUUUUUB

Twelve damn it.

Hey you! You're finally awake!

So a full re-lyric of "The Monster Mash"?

It's released

why is this the first I've heard of this. I'm off to watch several hours of glam contests

0 reason to be rude. Clearly.

@@kellevichy True, so stop being rude.

Enlightenment?

@@user-pi8pi3wj7h What I meant is a range attack that we could nearly spam. Like how if a Dragoon is too far away from the enemy, they can toss their spear every 2 seconds? I want something, like Enlightenment, but what we can cast every 2 seconds. I think we have to fulfill certain requirements to use Enlightenment.

I know she's seen them because I remember the fast pace always stresses her out 😂

@@kzorander8577 Huh, I got the impression that she hadn’t considering her surprise that it was an actual guide

@@Lorekeeper_GGuy she just playing it up for the lols

It began in XI so some people have been hearing it for over 20 years, though it's kinda justified

@@wolfspledge1762 I was an FF11 DRG. I remember. And justified or not... get some new material... please! XD That dead horse is literally fossilized and they're still beating it.

One day it'll finally become funny. For sure.

@@Zakjuh Nothing is funnier than endless repetition of course. My dad told the same dad joke a number of times a year as long as we lived at home and now I can't wait to tortu... I mean enlighten my children with the same joke, over and over again.

Depends what you mean about forcibly slowed and just what you want out of the game. If you want to boost and jump straight into Savage, you'll likely suck from not knowing all the standardized tells and markers the game has built up over the years. If you want to go through from the start, you'll have to play through the entire story from the beginning. I would advise it as it's a very good JRPG story, but it does mean taking rather long before you get to "endgame". In reality, every part of the game is equally important. It's not like some games where you just rush to the end in order to spam raids. My advice to maximize enjoyment is to go in blind and just kind of explore and figure it out as you go along, only keeping in mind that if you happen to dislike the low amount of voice acting or somewhat slow, meandering story in the beginning sections, that both of these aspects begin to improve once you hit level 50, and then improve dramatically as you begin the Heavensward expansion.

Well, in your case it's literally lag, but also the way the game calculates a DRG jump is that you are still where you jumped from until you have fully landed at your destination.