Definitely. My ex-best friend always made fun of everyone behind their backs. Sadly, I was really surprised when I found out he was doing the same about me.
This is very true! Good point! They will rarely have a sincerely nice thing to say about other people. If you suspect you are dating one and they have an ex, listen to how they talk about their ex.
My use to be narcissistic friend always talked about her ex bf and how the cat was bothering like she said the cat was dirty which is wasn’t and why the cat was walking on the dining room table.
100%. Run as soon as safely possible. Love is never degrading and fear and anxiety. If you don’t get away soon enough you will lose your health, mind and very life. Guaranteed.
Finding the courage to walk away from a narcissist is a triumph in itself. When you realize their true colors and see through their manipulative facade, it's a signal to run as fast as you can. Protecting your mental and emotional well-being becomes your top priority. Remember, you deserve to be treated with love, respect, and kindness. Cutting ties with a narcissist is a powerful act of self-preservation. As you distance yourself from their toxic influence, embrace the freedom to rebuild your life and surround yourself with healthy relationships. Trust your instincts and never settle for anything less than the love and support you truly deserve.
@@ToxicFreeTV I can relate to your experience as I've been maintaining no contact with my narcissistic mother for the past 9 months. It's particularly challenging since she's my only immediate family member here, and both my brother and father have passed away. The situation escalated when she manipulated my father's passing for personal gain and scapegoated me, leading to smear campaigns within the family. It's disheartening not having anyone to confide in. I'm sorry to hear you're going through something similar, and I hope we both find the strength to navigate this and emerge into a brighter future.
My Narc husband started the wondering eye literally on our wedding day... & then his porn addiction was revealed soon after. I couldn't go anywhere with him without being disrespected & humiliated to my core, it was SO BAD. He had me feeling so insecure & a shell of myself. He couldn't even hear a females voice in the distance, without INSTANTLY looking around for the source. 🤢🤮
Porn is a huge issue that a lot of people downplay as "entertainment"... But those of us hurt by it know how dangerous it is. I'm sorry this happened to u in your marriage too 😔
My African ex husband would flirt with African cashiers at BJ’s Club; I was behind in mobility scooter. The girls would try to stop me from adding items!
Tendency really shows Us, what background motives we have to find, and deal with. Like, I was a people pleaser, because barely got approval as Young, and participated any contests to earn it. Haven't received hugs, no closeness as kid, and lots of screaming? So, being ignored, no sex later, adulthood, of course, I tolerated long. Have been without Father, and by each stepfather 's '"trial time" ending, had sadness, that none of them could stay: So , became a codependent person. Traumatically bonded easily later. Any Bf, who later wanted me, no matter, how problematic, I was with for long years (even if relations weren't the best, or 2 were narcissistic). (By the way...Mothers should be dating as Friends with new Guys, so they fully till the last trait, they get to know the Guy before committing !!! Likes, dislikes, world wide, morals, character, agreeableness, humbleness level, patience, will to change, so so...all have to check out. Then the kid, doesn't get hurt, when a simple Friend leaves, not a Stepfather.) We face the issues, so we can be the change in Family.❤ Not to make same mistakes. Not give away to our kids any misery, but give solid skills, to protect self from world, and till a limit, also protect them and comfort.🎉
Narcissist are experts in spotting empaths....so once ur empath u r always in their radar....and will often be targeted by all of them...cannot drop ur guard
Reminds me of my ex. He pushed and pushed constantly for threesomes and cuc*holding. He did all kinds of things like setting up fake dating profiles for me and having men contact me, but he wanted to know everything about the communication and constantly accused ME of cheating. I wish he had cheated on me, it would have given me a break from his sex pestering. #3 for sure. Put in so much effort for stuff I told him I didn't want. He said he wanted our sex life to stay exciting. We weren't even together for 6 months by the time we broke up! Now I consider it sexual ab*se and would never tolerate anything like it ever again. Luckily, shortly after, I met my husband who is basically the opposite. Loving and kind and listens to me!
This is true with my husband we both attend church but as soon as he gets in the car he starts putting down people in the church. Then he makes declarations of how he can make it better😮
I would like to see a video of how they treat their partners children that aren't biologically theirs. They really don't like kids from what I have seen. Not even their own
they hate themselves so how can they love you? I mean, really? I had many narc boyfriends, I never realized at all about narcs. never. but now I see. controlling, cheating, liars, pretending...........there is no loyalty. it's to feed their EGO and your job is to serve them. period, end of story. narcs seek vulnerable people who feel the need to please others to gain approval and love, it's a simple fact, victim meets victimizer. I seriously can't believe I was in such denial. for decades even. how did I start to wake up? I had a couple things happen. one, I was watching Dead Files on tv, Amy was telling a woman that her haunting terror was caused by her sociopathic mother. something actually clicked inside me, like, "wait, what?" something bothered me and I had to watch it over and over, to hear her say this because there was a part of me that this resonated with and yet, I didn't want to admit it? but finally I started to tell myself that I needed to listen to that and pay attention. then, another time, another neighbor (total narc) would act to me like I was the crazy one and "can't we just move along" if I questioned her on one of her many "untruths" she told and I would just ask her, "but didn't you say that?" and she would make me the wrong one. over and over. FINALLY I begged God, show me what I am missing here? what am I supposed to know, Lord? and he directed me to these kinds of videos. I had NO IDEA I was so buried in my denial but I was. when I was unhappy as a kid, my mother blamed me instead of taking responsibility for not taking care of my needs and told me to, "pretend" it wasn't happening..........so I did and I did it all to please her and to gain her approval and love which I NEVER GOT by the way. so thankful I am healing now and it takes awareness and ACKNOWLEDGMENT of what is happening. it is okay to LOOK and ADMIT it is not right that this is going on, you do not have to be loyal to a narc at all, they are sick and they do not want you to know that they are manipulating you but they are. wakey, wakey, evil has to go but we have to wake up and know it is okay to admit it is happening. videos like this help a lot. We need God to help us as well. otherwise evil will continue unabated. thanks Danish.
Yeah I was told I was controlling bc I said I didnt trust him with a group of people at a bar and prefer he stays home bc the many weekends before always disaster. I laughed at the absurdity of him peojecting Im controlling as im not at all... i told him, no i dont want man who I need to control. Im not your mother, an officer or more. Im a women who wants a man who is able to control themselves. Not be implusive, flirting, not thinking their immoral a amoral acts are justified and you have zero self control and scourge
Dear Danish! Would like to add a bit of more details to the "wandering" point. Not only eyes, but in general, ALL of attention, is on anything they do, but not listening to us,when we tell a story, or tell any information, which is longer than 1 sentence. (And no, comorbidity happens, but not their Adhd causes that they don't ever listen. Just...not serving them. Only listening, if You say loud, what their addictions are . Like...hey, here is Your (insert here, chocolate,alcohol, drug, card game, controller,...) etc Our info...is valueless to them, about our daily life. Unless,wanna make joke of us with it.
This is very helpfull! The wandering eyes and body issue, describes what i felt and was not aware of. You pinpoint out very usefull things . Thank you so much. Hope that many people see this movie and discover that they are with a Narc. Important to know is that you not always see it,because, you don't want to believe it. Acknowledge is the key. Acknowledge that it is not your fault. Acknowledge that they are bad. But not seek validation for this with THEM. When you realize they are narc, you want to check with them. You want the comfort that they do love you and want validation and acknowledge for your perceptions. But they will not give it, they tell you a little bit that it SEEMS they love you, or, find excuses for their actions. How hard it is, it is extremely hard to turn around and run, but, please do it. Run if you notice these 3 points in someone.
Ps and this goes for narc friends as well. Not only love relationships. Friends with benefits. Clients. Borthers and sisters. Parents. All the knowledge in these movies, apply to other forms of contact as well. Do not do business with narcs. Translate everything what is said by Bashir and other coaches about how to handle narc love relationships to the form of contact you have with you know or suspect to be a narc. Another sign is: when you think about breaking contact, that you feel desperate by the idea. Feeling hopeless; no, i cannot live without them! That is a conformation, you are dealing with one and therefore HAVE to do this difficult thing: RUN.
It's us against them isn't it? Just that we're questioning is answer enough! I'd marry mine again in a sec but so much to catch then keep happy but as an angler I believe in catch and release, enough is enough! Who'se got the energy or tricks up one's sleeve to endlessly admire them, make them feel special, you've your own soul to take care of, they'll destroy yours just to feel better about themselves if you're not careful!
This is one of the best videos that explains a narcissist! The narc I was with did this exactly and he did know how to take accountability and behaved very well, treated me amazing…in the beginning. And it took awhile nearly a year into the relationship for him to go full on narcissist. When we were engaged and I was pregnant. He thought he could treat me however he wanted and I wouldn’t leave at that point. Wrong. I left. It’s true no matter where you are in that relationship LEAVE. It was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do because I genuinely loved him and I had to and still am dealing with the reality that he never did and it was all a lie. Especially when the beginning was so good it’s very difficult to let that memory go which is why so many of us stay much longer then we should. I just keep telling myself…If that’s who he always was…and I deserve so much more and so do my children.
He did all of these things, and surprisingly at the earliest stages. Literally the first visit out on our LDR. He really wasn't hiding it at all. (But he always tried to have a good cover story). I am not sure if it is because it was an LDR and thus he had not yet established me yet as a permanent supply, or if he is simply used to manipulating women who are easier to fool and abuse. Also just want to put this out there - Some people might not have stereotypical traits. Although it's not about gender, sometimes certain things are still applicable. Eg, my ex is a man but has many feminine traits, and often uses many female narcissist tactics. Eg instead of yelling (mostly, although he did on some occasions) he will cry. It's always the emotional waterworks, cutesy behavior, pretending to be sweet and caring, etc. And using these emotional displays, along with guilt and gaslighting. Thankfully I have been through this before with a borderline, which was more extreme but the same principle. Thankfully I got out in just under a year.
I NEEDED this video with point 1! My ex ex, he was looking and commenting at everyone! Even my friends, my clients in my store etc magazine tv etc there were no were to go without knowing how the girls looks. I knew the complete dictionnary of hot pretty cute etc what it means and the number on 10. like 30 times a day or more. But me nothing. No compliment. I detoriated so much and he wouldn't care to see me cry of pain and he knew I was battling Eating disorder for os many years.. but no. I didn't have a dad he said one day, I didn't know how were men but all are like that and those who would say they weren't, were lying. He had me on the doubt, I didn't have much of my dad indeed so I got lost and in so so so much pain. Until I had anxiety attack to just go out the door, I couldn't hear talking about the body of other girls anymore and I just walked away. But it took me 5 years of being single and even in my next relationship, I was triggered and had flashback of being out with him.. which.. affected my other new bf who was not at all able of empathy.. he took him about him. Not poor me who is having a hard time it was what he is doing wrong, why are you having flashback at my birthday, tell me 5 minutes after it happens not 10 etc he would yell at me when I was in flashback and anxiety. anyway.. you see the story. Thanks for sharing
As someone with ADHS i also have wandering eyes, cause it helps me stay in focus to listening to someone. Even if we're the only people in the room. Not always ofc, but i would not call it a "sure sign" of narcissism. Total agreement on #2 and #3 though.
@@jbrown2908 I didn't misunderstand that. I know why my eyes are wandering, but another person does not and could missinterpret them. It actually has happend to me several times that people are complaining: "Why you're looking somewhere else, you're not listening to me." What helps is communcating about it and active listening.
In personal relationships, normal, decent people are reciprocal. Narcs are transactional. The boundaries problem with narcs shows up here too. They can't tell the difference between personal and business. Some people are naive and run their business like it's personal and get taken advantage of. Narcs are cold hearted and run their personal life like a business to take advantage of. This also make sense with narcs since up is down and left is right.
They don't say sorry. Instead they will say, "now forget about it. Let us end the topic and move forward. There are many more important and happy things ahead in our life which we should enjoy. They make you feel that you are overthinking for the thing which has no value.
Not only at women - but ANY audience! Any other group, any other team. Shallow, superficial, acquaintance level relationships that never ask anything real or deep of them. But never home. Never something I prioritize or care about - ANY excuse to get out of or avoid that.
This video is an understatement re my narc husband. Wherever we go, he is shamelessly after other women, praising them, even describing their body parts to me ( yuk), desperate for other women's company to the extent that he has run after a group of young girls ( old enough to be his children) only to be snubbed by them. Never once apologised for his behaviour. Totally into imitating me in everything I do, so much that it is disgusting and ridiculous 🤮
Can the course help you recover if your still “stuck” With the narcissist? How can you walk away when they are family? Especially when they disable you so that you are reliant on them?
I had to give up on a father, a wife, and a daughter. Had to go no-contact. But I didn't have financial dependency on them. Obviously, to avoid homelessness, you need to gain your own employment first. Then you can always find roommates in a cheap apartment while you're getting on your own two feet.
@@helloeveryone39 yes this is the problem with me my father controls controls everything and I’m so worse off if I walk away it’s a terrible disabling situation mentally financially emotionally
@@helloeveryone39 I hope 🤞 things get better for you too ❤️🩹 It’s really bad because I’ve got a high level of education a masters and I have nothing to show for it cos it was drummed into me that I wasn’t good enough and then wasn’t able to strive for more to what should have led me to become financially independent Words cut more deep than ppl can imagine 🥲
One more thing narcissists do they always talk about their Ex and their traits And They Are Very Possessive Even If You Talk About Your Friend Bloody Hypocrites They Are And They Can Be Super Jealous Even When You Love Ur Mother,Father, Brother They Want All The Attention And Love For Them Only They Can Leave Nobody But Wants Us To Leave Everybody For Them
This is super interesting! I have found myself in this situation doing some of these things. I have really tried hard in my relationship. I thought my wife had a little bit in her. But maybe its me. I have found myself to be a an agreeable person. But at times i have fallen short in these categories.
Hi Danish, thanks for your videos. They really help. Could you please make some videos on divorcing a narcissist wife who is extremely controlling , manipulative, paranoid and liar. Thanks
I didn't see any signs of narcissism the only one I've noticed that silent treatment ... and to share the things on social media what I lack ... and the stages.. love bombing , taking off masks when I'm controllable , and disrespecting me and when I complain the only reply I get is "ok" ... & the same cycle again and again ... And I leave the person
I am definitely in a relationship with a narcissist. Not exactly what type of Narcissist he is, but if I could explain the situation I'm currently In... and why I'm stuck, with no way out, all while be fully aware I'm nothing but supply to him... idk what to do?
Many times i have observed his eyes will be on other women in spite of his partner besides .. i feel he is not loyal , always his eyes are on others. On top of it his doubt is i am in a relationship with someone else. Not at all in good terms it's just like complete drama being with him . No real relationship not all happy too😞 he is being egoistic always.
I've dealt with narcissists my entire life Covert/vulnerable, Overt/grandiose & malignant My dad was/is a narcissist, my ex is a covert narc, narcissistic friends, malignant narcissist friend turned rapist
