5 Key Ingredients Every Fearful Avoidant Must Have To Trust Their Partner!

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Rebuilding Trust & Overcoming Jealousy in your Relationships
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Do you want the 5 things every fearful avoidant must have in order to trust their partner?
In this video, Thais Gibson shares 5 key ingredients that every fearful avoidant must have in order to trust their partner while having a thriving relationship!
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00:00:00 - Intro
00:00:16 - What Is The Fearful Avoidant Attachment Style
00:01:08 - Foundation of Trust
00:09:23 - Ingredient #1: Vulnerability
00:09:35 - 7-Day Free Trial: Overcoming Broken Trust
00:10:39 - Ingredient #2: Accountability
00:11:19 - Ingredient #3 & 4: Transparency and Validation
00:12:42 - Ingredient #5: Consistency & Congruency
00:13:45 - Summary
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I’m Thais Gibson, welcome to my channel, and thank you for stopping by!
This is a channel designed for you, to be used as a resource to create lasting transformation in your personal and professional life. Here you’ll receive an ongoing series of personal development and spiritual growth videos for you to expand your awareness and find resolution and deep understanding within.
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Опубликовано:

14 июл 2024

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Комментарии : 130

@teaganv8882 Год назад

I had an FA ex and I was becoming FA just through being with him. There was so much inconsistency in that relationship, I never knew if he wanted me to come closer or pull back. I always needed to have 'backup plans' incase he cancelled last minute. It's hard to be there for an FA when the FA is not being there for you. One moment you get love bombed and the next they pull right back. You never know if you or coming or going.

@sherriflemming3218 Год назад

Good points Teagan

@rosestewart1606 11 месяцев назад

this is where I am right now. I'm watching these videos because I'm trying to figure out if I can stay long enough to make things better.

@jonathanveriez3766 11 месяцев назад

@@rosestewart1606 I've tried for a year and a half... sadly things eventually went sour.. don't invest too much would me my advice because it left me emotionally drained.

@resurrectedstarships 10 месяцев назад

Oh this sounds SOOO familiar.

@jessicawang1941 9 месяцев назад

Was with a FA and got hurt very much. One minute, they are a sweetheart and would love bomb you; the next minute, they would completely pull away and deny all the feelings for you. It's like they had their arms open waiting for you to run into them, you were so happy and running towards them like a naive child. The moment you were about to touch them, them took their arms back and turned their back on you. You fell on the ground with a confused face and a broken heart.

@karencoleman6800 Год назад

1.Vulnerabilty 2. Accountability w/mistakes 3.Transparent (context w/why it happened) 4.Validation 5. Consistency, Congruency & consideration The foundations of TRUST

@kongming66 Год назад

Literally lived up to all of these and still got dumped this week...I'm wondering now if that's a sign she was more than FA and was diving into narcissistic or BPD territory...

@user-rm1xh1fu9o Год назад

@@kongming66 FAs are chameleons. Be yourself the right person will appreciate ❤ God bless

@user-rm1xh1fu9o Год назад

FAs want a perfect person yet their behavior is below the bar of perfect. People need to have boundaries with FAs & be who they are. Stop changing for selfish inconsiderate individuals regardless of attachment style. FAs in the comments section of many videos are proud of their Maladaptive nonsense. Some even are aware yet are proud to be parasitic in society. With all due respect the videos are teasers for her school & not enough to help individuals who real lack intellectual & emotional insight. FAs are no different from people with Borderline personality disorder. FAs have a air of sadistic nature with masked low self esteem & self worth. They demand the moon & heavens because they know the partner will not deliver to confirm their ideal relationship is with themselves not with real people. Leave peterpan & tinkebell "FAs" live without their drama & bottomless pit of me me me black hole. Thais must stop over empathic coddling of disfunction. Call a spade a spade if you really healed, which I doubt. Her tells are clear in FA video. Go to other channels to get help to improve yourselves for free or a real therapist. FAs need real face to face discussions, not pseudo validation by their pack member/ leader

@user-rm1xh1fu9o Год назад

@kongming66 you correct they BPD. They will waste time cause they lack insight in their conduct

@user-rm1xh1fu9o Год назад

👌 summary, her videos lack order😅😂😂... so much fluff to get to the meat🎉

@LSGO90 Год назад

I’m a FA and I approve of this message.

@Regina.Clarke Год назад

Same!

@ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool Год назад

yes!!

@emilyb5557 Год назад

Me too 😅 and it all sounds very reasonable too, not just "extra needs" because of past. But the context of why it's extra important/impactful for me is helpful.

@lmart16 Год назад

Likewise 💯

@dianneciresi7208 Год назад

Consistency, congruence & consideration . We need all 3 & prolly more. Not many men can offer all that to us..

@shauty05 Год назад

Man I was consistent, congruent, considerate, transparent, vulnerable… and she still pushed me away but I could tell she wasn’t ready to work WITH me… so I had to let get go

@jonathanveriez3766 11 месяцев назад

Kinda the same here...

@hansmartin6053 5 месяцев назад

For it to work both needs to be this. If only you are this - they will push you away.

@Sidera17 Год назад

I changed attachment styles in adulthood. I was an anxious attacher until I met my ex spouse, who knew how to steady that part of me. But once we got married I became disabled and he was my primary caregiver and our relationship started to fall apart. He become aggressive, manipulative, unpredictable, harsh, and leveraged my health and medical care over my head. I never knew what it was like to be around such an unpredictable person and having them in charge of my wellbeing, I can only imagine what children with unpredictable parents go through. After we divorced, I realized with subsequent dating I now was fearful avoidant and very chaotic in subsequent relationships. I can’t even form friendships anymore bc most of the time I am just dismissive or feel dead inside and prefer my own company. I get lonely sometimes but I have no energy left to start any more relationships.

@Alan-lb8ef 10 месяцев назад

I hope you can heal

@LeeChrissy Год назад

Thank you for clarifying that a FA is actually a Disorganized Attachment. I thought I was an AP, but I took the quiz and it came back FA and it makes so much more sense to me. I was starting to think I might be bipolar, but I only seem to get this anxiety when I date someone I care about. It's awful....especially when dealing with a DA who's possibly a FA too. I honestly think it's best to walk away (again lol) and do some deeper work on myself. We went from situationship to relationship back to situationship and I don't see a solution. We haven't dated anyone else but each other and he always comes back when I leave. I just don't know how to let myself trust and feel safe. Just a few days ago I felt great about us and now I'm a low-key wreck and he's doing nothing wrong. I don't feel fully comfortable in a relationship or out of one.

@Crows_before_bros 10 месяцев назад

When I met my partner a year ago (he is the FA in this equation), he told me he couldn’t have a relationship with me or with anyone and that attachment is the root of all suffering. I could tell from the way he looked at me when he said it that he loved me 😂 and it was very confusing and upsetting. I gave up for awhile. We back and forth and I got frustrated repeatedly by his acting just enough like a boyfriend for me to glimpse what he’d be like as a partner without actually committing to me or letting me in. We reconnected interestingly during a very stressful time six months ago (my father died suddenly) and played a card game designed for meaningful conversations by Esther Perel. He later told me it was how I responded to the questions he chose from the deck that made him feel he could go farther with me. There have been a couple of small bumps but thus far we’ve been having a really lovely relationship in which we are both learning to communicate and trust one another more than we have anyone previously. I’ve met people he cares about and he introduces me to people proudly as his girlfriend. He’s reliable and consistent (with obviously taking it o consideration we both make mistakes and that’s ok). He thought he was not worthy of love and that for months when we first met but were not “dating” that I didn’t truly like him or fine him attractive and nothing could be further from the truth. I’m able to tell you this because he has been to therapy and I have in the past as well and have improved my communication over the years. Don’t give up hope!

@GEOFFAMORTON 5 месяцев назад

It’s funny. I had a friend who recently barrelled back into my life with a big “I miss you so much” and asking if she could call. I couldn’t take that call when she asked as my boss happened to call me at the very same time, and I wanted to be able to give her my complete attention. But I didn’t want to just leave her hanging. She asked if she could call and I wasn’t going to just leave her hanging. So I set up another time where we could talk uninterrupted… but come that time, suddenly “oh, in a few hours”, and then in that few hours “oh, I’m just so busy, another day?”… which ultimately she ignored all my attempts to set up. But I tell you, my thought when she started putting me off was “oh god, not you too”. I’d had enough bullshitters in my life and I knew she wasn’t “busy” on that day. I could have handled “I’m really not up for a call, could we just text for a while?” But that sense that someone who had always been constant with me suddenly jerking me around… that ended up triggering some of my issues, which ended up triggering her issues, which…. Silence.

@ng-marc Год назад

❤️🥂 As an FA, 💯 agree. Building trust is everything. Relationships are 💯💯. Learning how to trust love, family, friends has been my life journey. A never ending story of discovery. Nothing has helped me more than this channel and PDS. Thank you, thank you, thank you 🎉❤

@daniellec4728 Год назад

It hit Home 100% when you said for FA, love can be lovely and very scary at the same time. When I feel love and happiness I immediately feel saddened and cry bc I love someone. It is really really hard to feel comfortable in that feeling

@nataliexo109 Год назад

I have been following you since April last year, so almost about a year. But I am so happy with the PDS channel. There is less info around on the FA attachment style, than the others attachment styles. Hearing about the “fa tedencies” really makes me feel less alone or crazy. It makes me understand myself more, and from where certain reaction to situations comes from. As a fearful avoidant it can feel very lonely, I often don’t understand myself, which makes it harder to know how to handle the situations and how to perceive them in a healthy way than out of the damaged woman. So thank you for making this content 🥺

@user-rm1xh1fu9o Год назад

There is alot of information. It's mostly under Borderline personality disorder FAs are discussed on many platforms. Stop being lazy & Using one source for information

@kevangelisti Год назад

Isn't this how everyone should behave in relationships? I'm FA but also I can't imagine a secure person not wanting consistency, compassion, etc!

@katlynkniceley1665 Год назад

Agreed. I am a strong FA and I am like wait… is this not what secure people need as well to have secure/healthy relationships? I just get overwhelmed because I feel like I constantly can’t attract romantic partners who are capable of doing all of these things. Which to me, is the understood components of a healthy relationship… not “asking for too much.”

@shauty05 Год назад

Yes, we want these things for sure but I don’t think the FAs (those that aren’t doing the work) realize how inconsistent, incongruent and Inconsiderate THEY can be… but they WANT and expect that from someone before they open up to someone else, IF they actually do

@theefamuesq Год назад

The needs of every attachment style are important and significant. The issue isn’t with the want; the issue is with the response given when those needs aren’t met and the stories we tell ourselves when they’re not met. As a recovering FA, violations of my needs have caused me to become distrustful in relationships and not give grace to myself or others. I have also internalized others behavior by telling myself that my needs not being met means that there is something wrong with ME. I’ve even told myself that I may never find true love because people will eventually hurt and abandon me. Working to become secure has helped me see that I can honor my needs while also understanding that how people may treat me is more to do with their incapacities and not me being unloveable. Also, other attachment styles may value trust and consistency but to a much lesser degree than a FA. For instance, I dated a DA who could sometimes keep parts of himself hidden from me. As a FA, I interpreted that as him keeping secrets and it affected my ability to trust him. Other attachment styles may not necessarily go to that extreme, but it’s important for them to understand that for an FA, transparency means so much.

@rosestewart1606 11 месяцев назад

I agree. I was secure before I met my FA. In other relationships I had these things without forcing them, I gave them without thinking about it. But if these elements were missing, it was a sign of something more. I think these are the bare minimum for anyone

@mfe7073 Месяц назад

Tbh I feel like these are good things for FAs to be able to put words on what they need and like how to ask for it. Plus an understanding of like WHY they're freaking out because they're response is going to be disproportionate to the action because of the history behind it.

@nikkideller Год назад

Consideration is soooo big for me If I don’t feel considered I’m checking out 🤣🤣

@tinkerz72 Год назад

Im an FA and the inability to trust is so painful. Often I don’t know who or whether I can depend on someone. And yes.. when I don’t feel I can trust or it’s broken-I’ll deactivate.

@SEVENTHREEANDNINE Год назад

It’s important for us FAs to learn first to trust ourselves again. Trust we are worthy of expression, valuable humans and we will be ok if another needs space or is hurtful (because they are growing / learning on the journey). Trusting ourselves that we made the best choices at that time Trust me I can think of my stories where people really were outright manipulative mean bitchy etc. that’s them not how I operate.. it’s been almost 5 decades to finally feel I’m able to constructively request resolution with people including those from the past. And no more doormat or taking it like a man even tho I’m definitely a feminine women. FAs have to be strong to spend so much time on their own. We need others to support our cause too. ❤

@gogohappygirl Год назад

Spot on as always! I’ve been watching your channel for 2.5 years now and I am a PDS member, and I cannot thank you enough for all your wonderful content, especially on the FA & DA. Prior to finding this channel, I had only briefly dated here and there in between long stretches of not dating at all. Now I am finally in a relationship, going on nearly 2 years. I honestly think I wouldn’t have gotten to this point had it not been for your amazing channel and all the heart and soul you put into it.

@notyourturkey Год назад

As an FA this was extremely helpful for me to see an example of what my unconscious patterns might be and how to work through them! Thank you!

@Regina.Clarke Год назад

All of these are so on point!!!! As I said to my ex the math was mathing. If you follow this, you can get an FA to open up and build something beautiful.

@ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool Год назад

❤ ❤ good work!

@jadint1793 Год назад

Open up big time.

@aina3387 Год назад

With my family I am secure, but with other people I am FA, and I just realized in this video that it is because my BFF's mother and family was very hot and cold, so that is my model for "other people" and how adult relationships work. I have friends, but a lot of them are at arms length. I 100% agree with the trust thing. Consideration, consistency, and congruency are huge things for me.

@brookebennett2113 Год назад

This is so helpful for me & now I understand why I have such a hard time trusting ❤ Thank you

@annamarsch6091 Год назад

Yes, thank you. This is the first time , I really understand myself.

@RachelMintz 10 месяцев назад

This brought me to tears today. So powerful. I just want to get better.

@bradleywesterford3587 7 месяцев назад

my mom didn't have substance abuse problems, but she did have wild swings in moods, and we never knew if she was going to be hot or cold on any given day. very controlling and disciplinarian.

@roshalllambert 9 месяцев назад

Love the tips given here!!

@kimberleywilliams9725 Год назад

Love this. Thanks Thais! I’m also an FA and more secure, and trust is a big thing for me. I do better if I’m given context and understand the “why” behind things.

@vorbis4860 Год назад

Seems to me like the MORE these things are present, the more the FA runs away because all these things build intimacy and they have a strong fear of intimacy.

@finna5970 Год назад

Has to be done very slowly and gradually

@Crows_before_bros 10 месяцев назад

You build it gradually and over time. Genuine trust isn’t granted that quickly nor should it be IMO and I am securely attached. it’s understandable that coming from an environment where intermittent reinforcement (in the context of abuse ) may have been present, FA’s are cautious around trust and waiting for the other shoe to drop.

@HH-pj5bl Год назад

Yet again another amazing video, I was little just talking to a younger one yesterday about trust and her in a new vetting stage with a boi. You're awesome Thais thank you 😊

@ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool Год назад

You're welcome!! ❤

@Tam_X Год назад

I just ended a relationship with an especially non-communicative DA for these reasons. Though he had good qualities too, of the 5 ingredients needed to build trust, he showed barely any ability to offer a single one.

@stevensantora2976 Год назад

Thank you so much.

@mercymunoz1408 Год назад

This is so true. Thank you for this. Especially for “considerate, consistent and congruent”

@AmericanDreamer 8 месяцев назад

yessss!!! Same! these 3 things are also for me really a fundament.. hoping to "awaken" my DA love bird to this, so he can also finally understand where I'm coming from , because these 3 things explain a lot about me.. I'm learning about him and Hoping it to grow mutual..💛

@jonathanvermillion7263 5 месяцев назад

So helpful thank you

@miller5170 3 месяца назад

Excellent video

@ALABRASILIANA 11 месяцев назад

I definitely threw caution to the wind and turned a blind eye in a false attempt at trust and ((now)) see how that was a major action of self abandonment.

@meg01968 Год назад

I’m mostly secure with components of FA. Thankfully I don’t push anyone away, it just takes a while for me to be able to be fully trusting, it has to be built/earned in a healthy way. Thank you for this video

@riyajacob2909 Год назад

Same here secure with FA wing.

@sunspiral79 Год назад

Problem is..the avoidant typically behaves in a way that doesnt deserve trust

@finna5970 Год назад

Pls enlight me, I don't understand

@shauty05 Год назад

You can’t trust the inconsistencies… lovebombing then being dismissed… there’s rarely any emotional safety & validation, or that they’re really gonna BE there when you may need them…lack of vulnerability and transparency

@blakephotographytexas Год назад

Agreed. My experience with avoidants is that they are so hyper focused on others needing to prove to them they are trustworthy, yet they do absolutely nothing to build trust with other people.

@sunspiral79 Год назад

@@finna5970 what part dont you understand?...Have you ever been involved with an avoidant?

@Crows_before_bros 10 месяцев назад

I don’t think every FA is necessarily that chaotic. To me it’s helpful knowing what lies beneath the inconsistency and hyper vigilance and occasional surprising irritability is so helpful. Rather than immediately being frustrated, I’m able to understand what drives the behavior that would otherwise be very confusing. not everyone with any given attachment style is identical. Some people are a little anxious in their attachment whereas others are much more extremely so and less able to self regulate and exert self control. Some people have tried to go to therapy and work on themselves, others may never take that step.

@markcafebrown2883 7 месяцев назад

Excellent video. My wife is an FA from past relational trauma. She totally needs to be more vulnerable and definitely needs to trust me more. She is in therapy now and hopefully that helps her. She has tried to push me away 2-3 times over our 17’year relationship.

@Bakesga 6 месяцев назад

Wow!! I’m a 39 year old male and I finally understand what trust is and how to build it. Thank you soooo much for the insight. It’s unfortunately too late to get my FA ex back. I broke her heart and lost her trust. She unblocked me and has ignored my texts. I told her my hand will always be there for her. Much love and thank you again! Will be watching more of your videos.

@nishantbafna9333 Год назад

Thanks a million for helping with this. My gf is a FA.

@ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool Год назад

You;re welcome! Glad this is helping ❤

@JamesTrouten-gf1zm 10 месяцев назад

Good one😮

@nomessnostress Год назад

you don’t know how may you are helping! well, maybe you do…. but Thank you Thank you!

@jojojo724 9 месяцев назад

Hmm I'm supposedly secure but these steps are exactly what I need to get past really hurtful moments in romantic relationships

@livewires8637 Год назад

The healthiest my relationship with the FA I dealt with was when I worked on my codependent traits, and as a result removed them from my life permanently. I wish them health and happiness, nowhere near me.

@pcdcma 8 месяцев назад

Thank you so much for this (and for the other videos, as well, btw). I created an anxious-preoccupied attachment style - something I want to work on - and I am currently in a LDR with a fearful avoidant (or dismisse avoidant - I think he is a very strong mix of both). I the beginning he would shower my with attention and love, and I would fell very secure, but now, since things got more serious, I constantly feel him hot and cold and sometimes sabotaging things on purpose. I am trying to build trust but it is incredibly frustrating because he runs away whenever I bring a more serious issue, despite the fact I do it with love and care. Then he changes his behaviour for hot again only to go back to cold within days. I am having difficulty finding a balance on how to respect his attachment style and give him the space he needs but also make him come forward, be vulnerable and respect my needs. Any tips? ❤

@evawebster1518 4 месяца назад

Run.

@nikolettavarga8351 Год назад

Prophet Thais Gibson

@nicolegowdy5889 7 месяцев назад

I have been talking to an FA for 2 years now. We've never been able to get to the dating phase even though we talk almost every day. He retreats on occasion and then I give space. Before I knew he was an FA, I probably didn't handle things right. We have both worked hard to respect each others needs. I feel like he wants to progress but I get frustrated and push, because it's been a 2 year dance. He says he doesn't want a relationship 'as such' but in the past few weeks has sent 2 songs which are love songs. I've felt for a long time he does have feelings for me. About a year ago he said I'd have you over but I don't trust you. And I flipped out (before I knew about attachment styles) and we stopped talking. We were so close to working through it then. Now when we start to connect he retreats or self sabotages. I'm not sure how to handle it because even though I've healed alit of my anxious tendencies I'm getting really impatient.

@Alexandermhinton 4 месяца назад

Walk. Not worth.

@nicolegowdy5889 4 месяца назад

Yeah, I pretty much have. I touch base on occasion out of sheer stupidity but I think I've realised it's a colossal waste of time

@Brandon-yr3nj Год назад

as a DA when my partner is distrustful it makes me feel really helpless.

@katlynkniceley1665 Год назад

Have they told you what actions /lack of actions that happen on your end that make them not trust you? I have with my DA… and to me he just views me expressing my needs as an attack and things he is incapable of doing… what seems simple to me seems extremely difficult for him to do. And vice versa, I think.

@Brandon-yr3nj Год назад

@@katlynkniceley1665 I really don’t think simple/difficult is the best way to look at it unless your goal is to feel superior lol. Trust is just another thing that is expressed and understood differently by everyone. For example…when my partner would do something unintentionally hurtful or inconsiderate, my first instinct was always to treat it like it’s no big deal, because I want to be clear that I trust his words and intent, he doesn’t need to be perfect, I can tell that he’s trying etc. Because that’s what would be important for me to hear. Eventually I came to understand that when I act too unbothered, he feels like I am almost indifferent to his company, which makes him less trustful of the relationship and my feelings for him in general. Both of these are valid emotional experiences that the other couldn’t understand without vulnerability. and neither of us are “making the other” feel a certain way. You *cannot* “make” someone feel an emotion; you do not have that kind of control over anyone and Vice versa. if you’re approaching a DA like “you do x y and z therefore I don’t trust you” like…what do you expect them to do? That’s not vulnerability. You can’t build a relationship on an endless list of things not to do.

@replaygeorge 8 месяцев назад

A friend of mine is DA, me being FA. For me it's not hard to open up, and offer trust when the signs are there, but with DA's you have this push-pull dynamic that erodes the trust of the FA, because the DA is not transparent about their changes in behavior. Also, with a DA it is hard to apply what it's said here, and should be common sense, because they tend to be very sensitive to anything that looks like a commitment or criticism. They tend to have their way, and if you don't like it, it's your (the FA) to adapt to it, you have to take care of yourself mantra. So, if I would question the DA's behavior, they would give the cold/silent treatment. The scary part is how quickly and unexpected their changes can be. Totally confuses the FA, and makes the FA to press on, like what's wrong (pushing the DA further away), or to shutdown, and while doing that repressing the FA needs, building resentment, and mistrust. What you can do is very easy from my FA point of view. Say, I need my me time, but you matter the same to me, and don't worry, we'll catch up (but you must keep that promise). The anxious part of the FA wants reassurance for their trust issue, and also want validation for their "am I still lovable" existential question. If you can communicate that clearly (no memes or odd pics that might mean eitherway), you can also have your needs met, and both are in harmony.

@antonioavitabile7066 5 месяцев назад

Gotta save this video and show it😅

@RachealD28 7 месяцев назад

Do you ever do one on one consults for advice on how to approach a situation? This is such an odd situation and we both really care about each other but we cannot figure out what is underlying. We ended things two weeks ago and still live in the same house for the time being and I am just lost. And I can see it’s hurting him too

@ckyung1312 6 месяцев назад

I’m DA and INFJ, she’s FA and INFP. Yeah, we see each ofher.

@chrisharris6462 Месяц назад

Ex gf was wrong for me but i hung on for too long. 6:56 she goes on dates with other guys. She didn't care but, gaslit. Set me back in my development. Some people show you they can't be trusted.

@thelovely961 11 месяцев назад

Thais, please can you make a video talking about consistent broken promises in a friendship or relationship and how this affects the fearful avoidant. This is a big issue because it affects trust and affects our regulation even when trying the self soothe, it affects connection because we find it then hard to trust when we started to try already and it makes it very hard not to deactivate and shut down when we communicate this and it keeps happening. I cannot find a single video on how good communication and or keeping promises can help a fearful avoidant to continue to trust.

@gems-n-gunz307 10 месяцев назад

Accurate…

@mdmcpherson8574 Год назад

💯

@siddharthray1436 3 месяца назад

Honest question to everyone..is it worth dating an FA? So i met this girl and our initial dating period was great.. she's a great date to go out with, gave a lot of attention, seems to have talked the talk(at the time), very driven, etc etc. She basically had everything i was looking for. So 2 months later i took the step to officially call ourselves gf/bf and she appreciated it too. Then a month later when both of us found ourselves in some (solvable) issues at an individual level, she put us "on a break". At the time at least, she kinda put it all on me saying i need to figure out my shit before we can talk. Now that i have, she is still resistant. Now she says she needs to figure out her own shit now. She is cold all the time on text yet she doesn't hesitate to respond. But her replies are cold. I'm a secure style and as much as i want to give her the space and time, I'm like is it all really worth it? What makes FAs special? Do they actually show unconditional love once they overcome or work on their issues? Would love to hear from FAs too..

@Alexandermhinton 4 месяца назад

Again, it’s always on the partner of the FA to shoulder the burden of threading the needle every day and having to be perfect otherwise the FA will bolt. Just not worth it.

@resurrectedstarships 10 месяцев назад

Does this woman do any one on one coaching? I am absolutely convinced the person I fell in love with (super-rare for me) and now on the 'break' with is fearful avoidant, after being hurt by a sabotage that went from great to blowing things up within 24 hours, pretty devastating... I am wondering when the time comes for more contact how I can make the most of it. Not necessarily to get back together with them but to get the most growth out of it. I am considering somehow being 'friends' with them for a number of months to build that trust first, if I am strong enough to do that while one or both might be dating other people. For now I am maintaining no contact for a few months at least (that's the tentative plan). We ended things on VERY affectionate note, with a mild hint of....to be continued?

@AmericanDreamer 8 месяцев назад

why did you agree/initiated (?)to go no contact with her? Would you or she prefer to not move on with the relationship, since you both like each other?

@evawebster1518 4 месяца назад

Them? Them is plural, but you're talking about just one person. Why can't you say it's a he or she? Not sure what the person is? I know it's a trend, but it's a stupid one.

@justventing5913 Год назад

I’m showing signs of being anxious attachment she shows signs of dismissive, she has pulled away before but only a day or two now it’s been weeks she says she doesn’t want a relationship she’s away with work In army but says when home she will see me and we can talk properly , I told her as she’s home in 3weeks il not speak to her now let her have space and see her when she’s home. Any advice?????? I’ve told her I understand I’ve been to needy and she needs space she now says she needs to focus on number one but says she cares for me , as she’s away with work we haven’t seen each other she’s away from her small child too can she just be home sick and stressed aswell as being avoidant? I’m lost

@aamacphisto Год назад

A question for the FA: are you faithful to your partner? Is it common the FA cheat their partner? And when you break up with your partner but you want them back, is it easy to be with other person (have sec with them)?

@epom9463 Год назад

I can only speak for myself, but I have always been vigilantly faithful (like I won't even "checkout" members of the opposite sex). This comes from a feeling of being betrayed by people I've trusted and never wanting to embody anything remotely close to the people who've hurt me in that way.

@replaygeorge 8 месяцев назад

FA's seek deep connections, so it's unlikely. They are worried that they might not be good enough for their partner, so cheating would totally work against proving themselves to their partner. Not saying a FA could never cheat. All these attachment patterns are a model, and while they fit to a great degree, they don't totally describe an individual or what might they do.

@imther1upedyrmom2 Год назад

1:23

@algudboison4827 10 месяцев назад

I think both me and my ex are FAs...

@bilfleming9036 11 месяцев назад

What TG vid would be complete without including the phrases, "That being said", "First and foremost", etc. The content, once sifted is good.

@deepmaven8773 Год назад

I've allow complete strangers into my home as they request professional care. I place my trust in others all while being cyber hacked and stalked by a narcissist family.

@tiagoguerreiro131 Год назад

What would you recommend if the couple is on the dating phase, the fearful avoidant spoke about their past experiences and being cheated and having trust issues plus being honest and stating that they don’t want to date multiple people and ask for the same to the other person and eventually the other person, who also have a lot going on in their life and not being a secure person, ends up hooking up with someone else when in a party?

@glitteryapple6819 Год назад

Sounds very specific🤔 I know I'm not her but the fa should probably leave - another fa

@johnnelson7192 Год назад

People, women, want to be "SEEN" "HEARD" AND "FELT" Like when a black guy says smoothly "I FEEL YOU HOMMIE" lF YOUR A MAN. LEAD!!!! BE YOU UNAPOLOGETICALLY. DONT GIVE THEM ULTIMATUMS JUST SAY THIS IS THE WAY. WHEN THE BACK AWAY. SAY IDONT LIKE HOW YOUR TREATING YOURSELF RIGHT NOW. SO WERE NOT GOING TO DO THAT.