Hey everyone, this was a test run for a new format for me, bear with the audio - a new microphone is on the way! That said, what myths are there about your personality type that you think are false? Let me know below!
@Connman Too real. When someone comes into my domain and moves something (or, like this morning, some son of a whore drained the dish sink while I was showering!) I take it personally.
Yup im super organized... I know where what i want to find is...... Its over there under the cloths in the corner.... Noo the other corner that pile houses my spare change....just umm always remember dont ask me where it belonges because wherever you just got it from is where i wanted it to be ( see we can be funny and agree at the same time )
I have a a list of places for everything. There are up to five different places I might put my keys. As long as they land near one of those five places, I can find them later.
0:35 #1 _”J? They must be judgmental.”_ 1:28 #2 _“INTJ’s are bad at reading people”_ 2:20 Good reader, not as easy to respond in a way perceived as “Normal” 2:31 #3 “INTJ’s Don’t Have Feelings” - They have feelings, they just don’t express it in ways other people do 3:17 #4 “INTJ’s are highly organized” - They tend to be laid back, but - Judge/shapes their world so they can do what needs to be done ✅ 4:56 #5: “INTJ’s Are Stubborn” - Intuition And Openess suggest this is not true 5:37 Thinking Far Ahead.
I'm an INTJ and I'm very good at reading people, though horrible at talking about things that don't interest me, It's very fascinating for somebody to know that I do haha, and yes I'm organized but stuff still gets messy like the user Can Pake I do weekly clean ups
I can't speak for all true INTJ types, but I can say this about myself. I do have feelings and they can be quite intense. I do not like to express those feelings and do make a conscious effort to mute them but am not always successful at doing so. There is a reason for this coat of armor that I find myself in. Being that Fi is a demon, it sometimes acts out like a 10 year old.
You will eventually need to learn how to compartmentalise these intense emotions. It is OK to ignore them 75% of the time, but you still need to flex your emotionally resilient brain muscle. Otherwise, the people who perceive your raw emotional landscape (xNFxs) will walk in, play about with your feelings, get bored after a while, then walk away leaving a mess, all the while thinking they did you a favor by playing with you.
I’m INTJ and my best friend is INTP. It’s hilarious that sometimes, when we start talking, people have no idea what we’re even on about. Though tbh sometimes I have no idea either 😂
Love INTPs. My best friend growing up I believe was an INTP. I find them easy to talk to. They are better with details than I am, which really helps if we are working on a project together.
Thank you! I was typed INTJ. 5 times in a row. But! the stereotypes around this profile you mentionned here were so strong, they had me think it was a mistype. For 2 years I tought I was INFJ or INFP for these reasons. It was only when I knew about the functions that I understood that INTJ was the right result. ( sorry for the English, I speak French)
I’m an intj but there is something that bothers me which is that people think that intjs are judgmentals , Narcissists, and psychopaths. However, I’m as an intj a nice and kind person and I hate Narcissists so bad
Not saying that you are a Narcissist. But if you were, you would not admit it to yourself. That's part of this affliction. And no one hates Narcissists more than other Narcissists.
@@taghreedalotaibi4442 Stop getting so defensive, I wasn't talking about you specifically. You mentioned something you don't like so I brought up something I don't like so that we can increase our collective pool of knowledge
Point 4 about the organizational patterns of INTJ's is completely accurate. My room is relatively messy,, given that I do cleanups once a week or so to maintain a level of civility, but I know where everything is. My brother is an INTP, but his room is messy and he often loses track of where things are. Even in the work place, I strategically place stuff in my working area so that it'll be as efficient as possible. If someone else moves something, Im moving it right back until im done with my operation. I thought organized clutter was specific to myself, but it's reassuring that other INTJ's can live like this
I'm organized clutter too. I have things where I know where they are and are useful to me. It looks like clutter to other people though. I had an ENFP friend live with me for about six months. She told me not long ago that when she moved in she was surprised at the "mess" but after being their a bit she realized that I knew where things were and it was my way of organizing. I'm wondering it it might partially be an Ni thing. We have an INFJ friend. She hates and complains right away about any mess at the ENFP's condo but has never said anything about my place. So I've wondered if her Ni sees the patterns of my madness.
Yes! So glad you made a video on this topic - the popular descriptions of INTJs are frankly ridiculous, painting them as some kind of business powerhouse when in reality they are often contemplative, reflective and deeply idealistic types with a huge depth of emotion. The ENFJ comparison is on point, a type which is on average more conscientious (and certainly more presentation-oriented) than the INTJ. In my experience both the ENFJ and INFJ types have a harder time admitting they're wrong than the INTJ, and I suspect the popular INTJ type descriptions are in fact an amalgamation of all three of these types!
I tell people "It's really easy to get me to change my mind about anything. All you have to do is prove to me why your idea is better than the one I already have."
As an INTJ, I want things around me organized.. But not my things. 😂😂 But even if things are messy, I can still find specific items in the pile of crap. When there is too much mess, I would want to throw everything to the garbage bin.
Biggest myth is that we aren't emotional, shy away from emotions, lack the capacity to care deeply about others. I was the only one in my family to go out of my way for others who seemed to be in dire straits. As a child I would give all my pocket money to homeless people (though with age I got wise and gave them food instead), and if someone seemed in distress I wouldn't leave their side until I was sure they were feeling better. The only thing is though, once I was sure the person was feeling better, that's where my caring stopped. Like a feeling of ''my work here is done''.
I said this on one of LiJo's videos and I will say it here. I think one of the biggest misconceptions about INTJs is that they don't care about people. I think they don't care about people's emotions, but really they care very much about people and their wellbeing. The way I see it, most people do things very frivolously and INTJs see right through that. Emotions just bar the way to finding a solution. So honestly, I think INTJs are the MOST caring type, they just don't use their emotions to do it.
I love when he says that he is always on time but he "just barely makes it." Yesss, so true! I also agree when he talks about how INTJ's have a house that is only slightly disorganized/messy. My mom and sister are both ENTJs so they make sure the house is spotless at all times. Then if you go into my room it's clean but there's usually something out of place somewhere, or I don't focus on the little details like dusting certain spots or organizing shelves.
Right!!! we like to optimize time & the end result! If the deadline is on 20th, we make sure that it would be done by 20th! Before that time tho, if we see something must be added to make the project better, we might add them on 15,16,17,18 or 19th! But no worry, it would be done by 20th! :D
It is a fairly lonely existence, at least in a spiritual way. Sure, with enough exposure, this type can be regarded somewhat highly for its clear communication skills that aren't too intense, but it's kind of a wasted effort finding someone else who can appreciate things like Hegelian Dialectic or Jungian typology.
Kyrious at some point I just started asking people right away: “What do you want to hear from me, emotional support or practical help?”. Because people are quite different at approaching problem-solving but so damn sensitive if you make a wrong guess.
As an INTJ, I agree with everything. Ideas for improvement: - Working on the background. This is a wall, this is blank and sober but this is quite basic. ^^ - Adding a bullet point list as you're speaking to keep track of the main ideas. It would be easier to follow the flow, especially for me who is not a native English speaker. - Adding the same list in the description with time codes like Michael Pisciarino did in comment. - I think jokes might be welcomed if it stays natural. Maybe using your video editor. Good points: - The ideas are clear, structured and easily understandable. - The speech is fluid and well-articulated. - The audio and video quality are not the best but good enough to enjoy the video.
Thanks so much for the feedback. I wanted to give a trial run before I decided to invest in a lot of equipment, but I've definitely considered the background (Sadly I live in a teeny tiny apartment and space is a little rough at the moment). I'm considering setting up a space at a friend or relatives house. Appreciate the honest constructive criticism, that's the way to grow. Thanks for watching!
As an INTJ i really appreciate the effort you put in to making your videos as concise and informational as possible, especially when you're dealing with misconceptions.
This resonated so much! This misconceptions made a friend of mine question whether I’m an INTJ (not always organized externally - small spots of disorganization at home, not always judgement, open to better things I’m interested in). But I definitely am an INTJ. I really like your videos.
INTJs are just guarded about emotions, doesn't mean you don't have them. In fact, most INTJs I've met (healthy ones, anyway) have a well-balanced Fi; think of it as morality/virtues/passions filtered through an analytical Thinker's objective, logic-based lens. You're going to get a lot of mushy stuff filtered out, but what goes IN is pure gold: You get someone who has an uncanny knack of fairness, of seeking justice for wrongdoing (for self or others), of honesty, and yes, nobility (not in the sense of kings and queens, but y'all get what I mean, lol). You get someone who wants to be real with others because they would rather expose the ugly truth for what it really is, rather than hide the awful facts behind sugar-coated lies. They want you to know, not be deceived or duped. They tend to remain cool and detached, but if you get to know them, and I mean REALLY know them, you'll see this glimpse-- and you'll know they do care. They just have a very different way of showing it. ;)
Nicely done. Thank you. Appreciate the clarification regarding how well we read people. What many don't understand is we're reading them quite well; we just don't want to disclose what we're perceiving. I've also been fighting a decades-long battle with trying to be organized, because I genuinely admire neatness as long as it's not compulsive. Unfortunately, "slightly messy" seems to be my set point.
To 12thDecember, I like your comment of, "What many don't understand is we're reading them quite well; we just don't want to disclose what we're perceiving." I'm not sure what AsuraPsych would state here, but for me personally, whether I'm reading a person correctly or not, I DO use a lot of internal filtering before I open my mouth in conversations. Thankfully, most folks correctly conclude from this that when I DO reply, I've thought through what they said. (It's wondrous how many people I've met like talking one-on-one with INTJs because of this. It also makes me wonder what the heck these folks ordinarily put up with in their everyday lives if INTJs are the best listeners they've encountered all week. LOL) I think the ability to not disclose what we're perceiving is a pretty worthwhile habit to have. (and our relative silence in conversations can thankfully cause people to drop everything and listen to us when we DO have something to say, including at parties.)
Lol stay out of my house! You called it big time. Also....it’s when people come and say “I feel it should be this way” and there’s nothing to back them up other than how they feel something should be, I dismiss them 100%...where as if someone says you’re doing this wrong because of this reference...yup I’m dumb let’s do it the correct way and move on. It seems people think that I or any intj is stubborn because we like to do things right and we are usually already doing it that way so there is no real reason to change.
I started keeping a calendar on my phone to remind me of things so I can have my space in my head to think. This way I'm more relax and use my time much better than worrying half the time of the stuff that I need to do. I also jot down notes on my phone. There honestly not that organized to other people, only for me. I only put keywords since I already know what it is; I don't need to write an entire essay. I'm super glad that I do these things because my brain and mind feel so much better now that it has the insignificant stuff out of my head
INTJs are the sweetest. They aren't judgemental at all, instead they will talk to anyone to learn as much as they can in order to gain knowledge that might fit into their own experience. Many will speak to an xSxx and be polite, but will feel much more enriched talking about concepts with xNxx.
Thank you for this video... especially the part on being organised. I realised I appear relatively organised to others. Yet I don't think I am organised enough/not in a detailed manner. I have never missed a deadline at work and in life. Was laid back in my teens, but I will never be in a situation when I could not graduate or got stuck in life somewhere. And I have most stuff in my head. It will get done. The most "inspired" ones gets done first. One of the assumption is that Te being in the "2nd" position, people tend to correlate with Ability/Proficiency? It is merely a tendency... the way I handle my external world.
INTJs can be seriously ineffiecient in learning something because they try to skip the appropirate steps and tend to stick to their own investigation process. At least I did. I am still learning to not get obsessed with details that seem so crucial to me when in fact they aren't.
dudeeeeeeeeee I was kinda doubting if I am an Intj bc of the stereotypes online. NOW IVE WATCHED YOURS I AM CONVINCED And also rly happy Im able to relate to this
You're my ideal partner... someone who doesn't demonize feelings, is humble about his intellect and knowledge and seems very kind and put together. Your wife is lucky!
It's been a year, and I was about to see your video tonight. How I wish I saw this sooner, then I wouldn't doubt my personality. Being certain now, I'm an INTJ. Thanks for this video 💯🥂
Pretty spot on. I'm neither as clean nor organised as non-INTJs say we are. 'Slightly messy' is well put. My INTP brother is extremely messy, and more emotionally reactive.
This is so true. Regarding the house example it is quite the same for me. My things are organized into specific locations but I would never say I am ultra organized. Things, as well as time constrained responsibilities, are organized and done, just enough to be sufficient. Also definitely INTJs feel very, very passionately but will rarely express the feeling. Regarding expression, for me anyway, it’s like I run through the simulation of what it would be like if I expressed the emotion and the result is that the other person will not fully grasp the feeling I am going to convey - and I will be disappointed and it will taper my enthusiasm, so I don’t express it at all. Also it seems kind of like a waste of time - like I am literally stealing that person’s time by requesting their attention to listen to me. After all, they’re not me and could not exactly feel what I’m feeling anyway, and I know they would probably much rather talk about their own feelings anyway. I would also much rather prefer to hear how they feel! This is not applicable in all situations- I have learned to be more expressive as I matured- and the value of it - regardless of my personal perceptions of the value. However in the majority of the situations I prefer to be less emotionally expressive for the reasons noted above. Come to think of it, I guess my values are strongly dictated or based on this kind of personal logical framework.
We are organized when it comes to living our lives .. like I'm going to wakeup knowing exactly what i am going to do, for example I am going to consider traffic when do I have to leave to avoid it and if I need to fuel the car .. its about planning things way ahead considering the smallest details not about tidying up everything and putting things in place.
I swear this is the best video on the intj personality. It’s clear and concise. The description of the functions were easy to understand and well applied in his points. Seriously, this is great work.
We had some friends over the other day and someone mentioned they had seen a show I love and don't get to talk about often. I started chattering happily, practically bouncing in my chair. Afterwards, another friend (who I've known about 6 years) said 'I've never seen you get that excited about anything, ever. That was wild.' I find that I get that reaction a lot once I start really letting my guard down around people. I don't think it's because I've never felt some kind of way around them, I just rarely feel the need to express it outwardly. It's (usually) like: I don't need other people to understand my feelings, *I* understand my feelings and will act accordingly. This may or may not be the best way to deal with things, but whenever I'm upset or angry, I often wonder whether I'm just *choosing* to be upset, and whether there's a different emotion I could choose instead, especially if I re-frame the situation.
To Jammie Dodger who said: "...but whenever I'm upset or angry, I often wonder whether I'm just choosing to be upset, and whether there's a different emotion I could choose instead,..." Dang, I admire how you described that phenomenon.
I am so so grateful for the fact that all of these explanations are rational and spot on, cause you said it yourself, INTJs are bad at responding to people and kinda hard to express their feelings (even if they want to) and by watching this video I understand why and I can finally have a basis of explanation to those other people who can't understand why I react in such ways...
This was really well-worded, useful, highly-competent, and IMO accurate. (and I've never before heard the phrase: as-organized-as-we-need-to-be. Well put.)
I like my answers straight to the point, solution oriented, always getting it done, a functional mess and also a creative,stubborn but open to new ideas and I love planning ahead.
Ever have that person say your wrong..... And you wait and wait and they still dont offer anything then they have the audacity to be insulting while you wait for them to offer you a valid argument as to why you are wrong ( this has happened to me on more than 5 occasions and left me confused each time ) it is a effort to remember people need to be asked to finish there thoughts... Anyone reading this that needs to know if you tell an intj they are wrong please follow that with an argument that valadates your opinion or dont say it at all... We all thank you from our hearts in advanced for that.
So well put and this is so relatable and for the first time I feel like this is exactly me! Have been an intj but somethings made me sleptical like the myths you mentioned here. I feel so much comfortable in my skin now coz before this video I was like am I wrong to think some of the stereotypes are total myths about INTJs, glad I am not the only one who thinks like that.
As an I INTJ personality, ppl misunderstood me so much that I'm a whole other person with them. This has been going on for years, so rn it makes me think that I'm fake of calling myself an INTJ... Even my mom gets mad bc I'm just not like the others in my family (as in reactions), I get tired of hearing her scream and build anger bc of me, so I act. It's tiring..
Completely can relate to the point you made regarding INTJ’s being stubborn. If your idea is better than mine, I will immediately jump on your boat. Everyone assumes otherwise speaking to me and seems to think that I believe I’m always right. Not at all.
Yes, I agree with everything you said. I'm fairly organized, but there are times I get so involved in what I'm doing that I don't recognize the disorganization around me. I think I read people very well. I'm constantly observing people's actions, mannerisms, and facial expressions. One of the best places I love watching people is at my gym - so many different characters, some with very apparent self-esteem issues. I have a pretty good BS meter, also, and I tend to steer clear of people who talk a good game but don't deliver.
You have the same personality that I have, even the way of talking ,the energy ,you sade you're an open minded to new ideas or opinions if they are more likely to be true and logic ...that's me,an INTJ☺️🌹
I agree with most of your points, thought I think some of them depend on the relationship between the intj and the other. Specifically when listening to advice and judging people. Intjs in my experience greatly value respect and it’s crucial in order to pursue a deeper interaction with them. If you screw up in front of one in a way they perceive as indicative of your intelligence and usefulness, you will definitely be feeling those stereotypes of stubbornness and judgement for a very long time.
I'm very appreciative for you dispelling these myths. Although I have to say I think we are a kind of judgmental 😁. But not in a personal way. Usually it happens unconsciously. I find myself doing it a lot when I'm trying to as much as possible to be honest about something and get to the bottom of it. Didn't know you were intj too, this is probably going to be my favorite channel now, ha ha.
Good points, I think it comes from how heavily one weighs in on the NiTe scale. When I was younger, in my teens, I was a lot more judgemental than I am now, kinda edgy haha. Thanks so much for the kind words, thanks for watching!
@@AsuraPsych Yes I agree, everyone grows over time. When I notice how judgmental I'm being (again not in a personal way but in an attempt to be objective or at least honest with myself), I try to pull back a little and be a little kinder (even though its all happening in my head and no one has any idea.... 😌 )
4:00 i relate to this so much. I never have dates on my phones, no more than 1 alarm, barely have journals- almost no journals. But never forget a date/deadline
"If you approach an INTJ wanting to talk about feelings, they aren't likely to respond, or know how to respond." (I love your expression here, BTW. I have seen its like on the faces of actual INTJs.) Your comments here certainly seem true to what I have believed myself to perceive. (How many layers of ambiguity is that?) At least if the INTJ and the Not-INTJ don't really know each other very well. (Retroactive facepalm for me, an INFJ, dwelling on past errors. Arrrrgh!) I think if you actually know the INTJ, they can actually handle your "feelings" pretty well, and can be quite supportive and helpful in helping one to analyze them and get a grip so you can stop embarrassing yourself. I don't really like to muck around with drama too much, myself.
I got invited to a wedding today & my 1st thought was, wtf am I gonna talk to these people about if I go. They'll think I hate them if I go because i won't have shit to say about shit. If i dont go they'll think I'm an asshole. You'd think they'd know not to invite me to no damn wedding or any kind of party. I'd just tuck myself into a corner with my wife & she'll get mad that I'm not talking to people. Uuuuggghhh.
Those myths are the reason why I mistyped myself as an INTP. All of those "lazy" xNTP memes and "stubborn" xNTJ are very misleading. Yes, I do get lazy but I do make sure I get my work done. I'm sure a healthy INTJ would, yes, thinks to himself as smart, but not think that he is better than everyone else. Thank you for clearing it all up.
I have to agree with this, I can relate to these problems and difficulties, as I have tried them myself. I have learned to use small words and not use hyperbolism; they lead to misunderstandings. My dark, indecorous humor is also something I need to control and guard in most social situations.
We are good at reading people but are bad at responding to them. We are pretty similar to ISTJ when you talk feelings or ask strange illogical questions.
As an INTJ I agree completely and this is a great video! I also don't agree with the myth that we are all mad competitive and super ambitious. As long as we find what we can do the best and enjoy the most I think we can be pretty comfortable on a certain level without badly wanting to move upward...
Indeed. I have found I am better than most at perceiving a person’s emotions in fact, but historically have lacked the ability to intuit WHY they may be feeling that way. This was especially true if the person was being driven by an emotion that I am less familiar with, like jealousy. I’ve also found that I could be pretty adept at reading between the lines when someone says something (that is, picking up on the emotional undertones rather than interpreting their words at face value) and then responding appropriately, but I am still too slow on the uptake to be able to implement. For example, I’ll realize after we have moved on to another topic that a person may have been subtly seeking reassurance from me, but by then it’s too late because we’ll have started talking about something else. It’s maddening knowing it’s just a matter of increasing my processing speed by a few seconds, but I’m sure I’ll get there with enough practice.
Labeling INTJs, the type who values efficiency and systematic innovation, as Stubborn and arrogant is moronic. We’re the ones who, like you said, don’t have time for being wrong. If there’s something that needs correcting I want to be corrected ASAP so there’s no inhibiting productivity. It won’t hurt my feelings. I might be a little embarrassed at most, but it doesn’t matter because that’s a small price to stay above mediocrity. Now when it comes to empirical evidence and objective facts - that’s when we’re called “cold and heartless.” For many, success, defeat, reputation, etc is tied to someone’s identity. Especially sensory feeling types have their capabilities tied to their identity, or the desire to be “right.” That’s where there’s friction. That’s where there’s time wasted over arguments because someone can’t put away their pride and ego for the sake of something greater than themselves because themselves are the only ones that matter. Don’t ever leave me in a room with ESF’s. There won’t be anything accomplished than streaming tears, fits of anger, while I stand there with my arms crossed wondering why I chose to acknowledge potential rather than what was literally in front of me - incapable, immature, peasants. I say peasants because they rather be told what to do than make decisions for themselves (rules) and prefer willful ignorance to free education. Something as simple as “Nguyen is Vietnamese, not Japanese,” is enough to make me look like a super-villain. And I don’t argue to be right. I debate to inform. Sigh. Rant over. INTJ female here. I am the 1%
Sable Wings You seem a little set on being cold. You don't feel a little bit bad if you cause someone to cry and they up being truly and deeply hurt? I do possess a concept, that for some, suffering is deserved. But once they've had their punishment or it's more than they deserve I tend to try to exercise some restraint.
INTJ female here, i experienced nearly the same situation a lot of times before too. 😧 i really dont get along with any sensing type. It cames naturally for me. 😆
@@Scoring57 feelings are definitely important, but I think the point of the intj rant was a comparison of types and how they think. Their criticism of the xSFx types is not anything personal, it’s just them finding inconsistencies in other types, albeit a bit biased. -ENFP
T/F has the same problem-- "thinking" implies smart and "feeling" implies emotional. It'd be better if they used something like "objective/subjective" instead of T/F. As a male T-type who represses his own emotions and is uncomfortable with those of other people, I see the "Feeling" in type descriptions, and I can't help but think "ew." But if instead, it said "Subjective" types make decisions based on the specific and personal contexts of a situation, rather than impersonal rules and abstract/detached logic, then I could dig that. I'm not sure what would be better terms for J/P, though.
I really enjoyed your explanation of INTJs. As an INTJ, I have to deal with people all the time who misunderstand or judge me. I have tried to become more expressive over the years, but it is still a challenge. Thank you for contributing your thoughts.
I tend to "read" people in a very scientific way based on analysing speech patterns, body language etc but find unless there is a problem to solve I am pretty useless at dealing with people on an emotional level. At work I ruthlessly cull items no longer required to maintain as clear a space as possible and yet struggle to apply the same rules at home where things tend to be a little messy and yet still findable.
