A couple of tungsten cube reviews 

Tungsten gameplay: This cube is made out of tungsten. *Tungsten lore:*

Sounds like a key item in a game. Needed to access the final boss.

He really threw into that eloquent, almost poetic, transcending description that he “held it in his mouth”.

The fact he specifies "wireless tungsten cube" means there is also sold a wired wired verision ?

Once you buy your first tungsten cube, you instantly become a collector of metal cubes, and the correct number of cubes to have is N+1, where N is the size of your current collection.

My favorite part is “those who have not yet held the cube in their hands and mouths will not understand.” I was truly shocked. He does not elaborate. He does not explain how he held it with his mouth. Nothing up to this point has indicated he has put the existential prism in his mouth. It’s absolute perfection.

I love how the second review is by William O. William Osman has a video of him smashing stuff with a tungsten cube. How nice of him to review it

3:04 "Good job on the tungsten, it sure is dense" is an amazing line.

I want to buy and carry around a tungsten cube for the sole purpose of monologuing that entire first review whenever someone asks why I’m carrying it around 😂

This guy to God: "Good job on the tungsten, it is exquisitely done."

One time I did a visualization assignment, and we were told to imagine a cube. Later on they told us the cube represented us, I was a tungsten cube.

People who live in a world of normal density: Hold the cube. This person: _Bite it._

This is literally how my teacher would expect me to write a 500 word essay

“I am in the presence of immortality” is such a badass way to end a review of such sophistication.

I love how that last review is literally William Osman.

Two opposite sides of the spectrum: the most sophisticated poetic man with a passion for this heavy cube and good ol' friend Khronk

This guy's vocabulary is master tier

Very reassuring to see that both the wise wizard and the migthy barbarian approve of the significance of this wondrous artifact.

The fact that this review describes the object as a "wireless tungsten cube" implies the existence of a less portable "wired tungsten cube", imagine how dense that one must be.

Im sold. I’ve been debating whether or not to get a tungsten cube. Now I know the answer is yes

I admire the person from the second review, for he was so attuned to tungsten, that he became just as dense

I love how he just casually admitted that he put the tungsten cube in his mouth

Tungsten has a remarkably similar density gold. No wonder ancient kings felt so powerful.

I can only imagine a scholar in the future studying these Amazon reviews as literature like we do Shakespeare

Never thought I'd be so emotionally moved by a description of a simple metal cube. The pen is truly mightier than the sword, and the tungsten is mightier than all.

Coming to listen this every once in a while has became a ritual for me

*”This Cube Cured my Mortality”*

Swedish scientist: "It's kinda heavy, I'll call it 'heavy stone'!" English-speaking world: "Roger that! “ Swedish scientist: "On second thought, scratch that, that's a stupid name, let's call it wolfram!" English-speaking world: "Tungsten, tungsten, tungsten!“

-You cannot fathom a universe transformed by this cube, your worldview enexorably altered by it's sheer density. -Heavy boi The duality of man

Not only the William O reply at the end but also that his video popped up right after the video about his tungsten cube

on that guy page there's also this silverware review i really like : A Life-Changing Experience Reviewed in the United States on July 1, 2020 Style: 5-Piece Flatware Set Wow. I bought these on a whim, wondering what it would be like to eat with fancy silverware, and man am I happy with the results. Life is a series of days. You want a good life? Have good days. You want good days? Surround yourself with people and things that make you happy. And that includes the small things, like silverware. It’s hard to describe the feeling you get when you eat with these. It’s not the most extreme feeling of exaltation and awe, but it is noticeable. It just feels like a little boost of happiness via gratification of your aesthetic sensibilities, like when you walk by a piece of art in your living room. I guess maybe the negative vector of this experience is more relatable: imagine having to eat with plastic silverware all the time, instead of regular silverware. On some level, it’s like, who cares? But it wouldn’t feel great if every day you had to eat with plastic utensils. You would feel like your life is not quite in order. This fancy silverware is the opposite of that feeling. It makes you feel like you’re living in paradise, at least, to the extent that silverware can do that. Anyway, some people only use fancy silverware on special occasions. But I say life is a special occasion, and if you want to take your meals to the next level, then get yourself some fancy silverware. Make every meal special. Make every bite a work of art. Live magnificently. Live triumphantly. Eat like a hero.

If this guy ever gets his hands on an osmium cube he’s going to ascend to literal godhood

To be fair this has made me want to buy a tungsten cube

0:34 let me introduce you to my little friend, *neutron stars*

This right here is peak humor. Just sincerely written, honest, max hyperbole. Fantastic

I don't care how much of this is supposed to be a joke, I don't think I've ever felt more compelled to buy something after listening to a single product review in my life.

Unironically this is beautiful. The person writing this had better get an award soon.

Me at only 1:09 in: “Fuck it, I’m sold”

William Osman: *drops the cube into a toilet he found on the side of the road*

"This cube cured my mortality." "Who am I, as a mere mortal-" "I sit here... transcendent above death itself-" Getting some mixed signals here

"Those who have not yet held the cube in their hands and mouths will not understand" is one hell of a sucker punch

3:00 "I say grandfully to whichever grand being may have created this universe: good job on the tungsten. it sure is dense." Best one I've heard so far 🤣

People are commenting about the guys vocabulary while I'm shocked how perfectly it fits with Jeaney's voice

Tungsten may be dense, but the only way to understand the weight of every decision you make and the profound impact they have on the world is by holding aerogel.

Picturing a big burly person writing this as their thick fingers struggle to press specific keys for they have become stronk from tungsten.

I love how, despite the obvious exaggerations, Lifting Tungsten for a lot of time would actually end up in you getting used to its density, thus feeling everything else way lighter.

2:29 "Those who have not yet held the cube in their hands and mouths" ....mouths?

I’m crying at this poetic master piece

The cheapest of the densest materiald (Tungsten) is no match to the financial burden of osmium

I once wrote in an essay that "mankind's greatest arrogance is that he believes the world to be as he perceives it". And I was always rather pleased with myself for coming up with something so snappy and articulate. However I've learned from this video that Schopenhauer actually beat me to it. How disappointing, yet simultaneously interesting. Also, great meme. Lol.

All jokes aside, I get what they’re going for here. Comparisons can greatly change the attributes of an item.

_The intensity of its density_

i come back to this one every once in a while, its peak

"Those who have not held the cube in their hands and mouths would not understand" And *mouths* ah yes my favorite sense. *T a s t i n g*

“Intensity of its density” my mans comin thru with the fire barz

It will always baffle me that I am somehow in the tiny minority of people who can legitimately say that they owned tungsten cube before it was cool.

I always misread this as "cured my morality," which imo is a much funnier thing for a tungsten cube to do.

I love how he acknowledge tungsten is only so important to him because it’s the most affordable of heavy elements

My hands have become so powerful from bearing tungsten, that it is now almost impossible to type without breaking my keybo

“Intensity of its density” is a good line

Aha. The eloquence of a true wordsmith!

Still can't get over the fact that the cube was held with their mouth.

Minecraft needs to add this for all gamers and people that play the game to understand the power of tungsten cube

When he said it cured his mortality, I thought it was going to go in a very different direction...

This guy's vocabulary is more deep than kingdom heart's lore. Perchance.

"Big burly manly men who pump iron" "Those who have not yet held the cube in their hands and *mouths* "It sure is dense." And the last review is a whole paragraph of funny lines itself.

This is actually how it was like when I worked as a welder. I lifted, shaped, and crafted steel all day long with my hands. Everything else I touched felt like cloud. It was amazing. You could throw a bowling ball at me and I would comfortably, graciously even, catch it without a second thought. Picking up heavy boxes for my mother felt ever more rewarding, too

Inside you, there are two giga chads

Just realised that tungsten has a melting point of 6192 degrees, gonna have to get an AC so this thing doesn't melt

The line of "To whatever grand being created this universe: You did good with the tungsten. It is dense." Is the best thing

"Have you yet understood? This is no ordinary metal. In this metal is the chemical potential to transform your world, by transforming your expectations." This line is surprisingly and unreasonably well written and poetic.

This is basically Dr. stone plot, getting tungsten led to curing mortality.

I like how at 1:52 he just completely deviates from the quote, basically going “and here’s that, but tungsten”

Uniromically though. Everytime I watch this review I legit want to buy a tungsten cube. This is the most effective advertisement for an object I never had any desire to posess ever.

“Billy mays here! This cube can help all of your sickness and disease “

Tungsten is no match to the financial burden of an osmium cube Or the medical burden of a hassium cube

the funny part is that the last review is william osman

Seeing this essay, and then seeing literally William Osment's review before he smashed things with the cube for a video is the wildest crossover ever.

When William Blake said: "Hold infinity in the palm of your hand" He meant the tungsten cube.

"The stand user could be anyo-" *_The fucking stand user:_*

My brain could never understand the sheer complexity of the last review it messed with my brain in ways my tiny mind could not understand.

I like how they specified that it is a wireless cube, implying you can also buy wired cubes.

"I'm gonna smash stuff with it!" NOW we're getting somewhere.

Imagine this guy's review of an osmium cube...

Give this man a neutron star

i love how the last guy is literally william osman

All jokes aside this is insanely true. A person that never carried tungsten in his hand won't comprehend HOW insanely it changes the perspective of the world. You pick up a hammer and you can feel it weighs a bit. You TRY to pick up a tungsten hammer and you break your back whilst doing so. When you hold a tungsten cube you can almost feel it piercing through the palm of your hand, it's unfathomable density is almost comical , you expect it to be heavy but not THAT much. It really just changes your perception of the entire world. Everything feels light afterwards. You feel 10x stronger and anything the same size as the piece of tungsten you carried feels unnaturally light, like if it became lighter all of a sudden

No one: Absolutely no one: My brain at 2am when I'm trying to sleep: THE INTENSITY OF ITS DENSITY

You’re tempting me unreasonably to buy a tungsten cube.

I like that he adds the detail of the cube being "wireless" in the beginning.

He calls himself a mere mortal, yet he claims the cube has cured him of mortality. Curious.

How I imagine my sentence comes out: How my sentence comes out: I hav tungsten cube and now I'm strong

Tungsten can be directly translated to “heavy rock (not the music rock)” in Swedish My brain always takes like 10 seconds of processing until it realizes it the English name for a metal (also not the music) Weird how much music is named after minerals, would a flower power hippie rock music be called bismuth?

Richard is what the sentence looks like in my head and William is when I forget every part of it and just create a super summarized version of what I remembered.

There's a reason why the symbol for Tungsten is W

I don’t know if this is important, but the second review was from William O. and the video that popped up at the end of this one was “Very Heavy Cube” from William Osman.

I love how this guy was just explaining how he beat death and then William fricking Osman says "heavy boi. Imma go smash stuff with it."

As one who has held a tungsten cube This is entirely accurate

So hear me out, Hand this in for an English assignment Result: 100% chance that it will make the English teacher weep tears of such joy. This is exactly why I'll follow the malicious compliance to not steal others' work. I wish not for the teacher to experiment with the joy this would bring.