A Gay Mormon Love Story: Elder | Op-Docs | The New York Times 

A tale as old as time itself

Actually sad

oh how true!

Oooohhh my! Nailed it.

So poetic! 😢😊

Thanks for that update!!

😢

Thank you!! I had just typed "What happened?"

Cauz gianni is his soul mate and no matter whom you marry or meet or fall in love it's different with your very own soulmate .

Pri Opoku tell Tom the “small still voice” was God.

Almost like it’s a documentary

Pataganja lol

But agreed

Almost as if that's what they're supposed to do in documentaries

@@Pataganja I think they meant more that...when all of the old clips were filmed, they probably weren't filming with the intention of it being for a documentary and him sharing this story - it was just them filming their trip. Its just lucky they had all the old footage so they could put this together

Ronez Zapanta that made me tear up so bad, poor dude couldn’t win 😢

The truth is tho, that we are all children of God. I’m so happy he found his way. The companion rule was made for heterosexual individuals so you don’t insight issues in the area you are assigned. It is sad that he was alone and further more than he couldn’t find the peace and love he wanted in his life. I’m glad he found his way.

😔😔😔😔

God is didn't exist

I am 48 years old and I am at the end of the rope too.

he was a smoker. NEXT!

Stu Mack it’s for a church, honey!

because uhhhhh jesus and muh gawd

Indie Go Unfortunately their story is not too uncommon in that way. Individuals sacrifice their own personal happiness everyday for various reasons. It’s a sort of daily torture that your mind never escapes.

Sad

YES!!!! Me too!!!!

It's so beautiful , i was thinking same ! He loves him , that's all I know !

Me too

I’ve watched this video at least a dozen times and it always draws me back when I think about it.

The first time I kissed I thought, at last, THIS is how it should feel.

Right. I had a similar experience. I SO related to that elegant emotion.

@@rhanna5188 you are counted among the blessed. Be well ❤️.

❤❤❤

1.- How did they fall in love with each other? 2.- Why did they fall in love with each other? 3.- After many years, were they still sticking to the rules? Or have they changed a bit? How are they now in their way of being? Sorry if I ask, but I like to learn from other people. I like it a lot.

His story is similar to CALL BE BY YOUR NAME.

YES OMG. It would be such a hit!!

@@HJ-mg3dg IM SCREAMING! THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT WHEN I SEEN THE "Death IN Venice" CLIP!!!

IKR??? Call Me by Your Name vibes.

IKR he’s an amazing story teller

Lucy Ferr shut up poocy

@Lucy Ferr shut up poocy

In the days of old, there was a blind traveler that wanted to travel the world for fun and did so by starting in Russia of all places. Now he wasn't blind from birth and maybe that lent to his abilities later in life but his charm and charismatic humor furthered his ability to feel his way through his travels. The path was not easy but friends were made, new foods were shared and the trip around the world did come to be! I thought about this (true) story more then a few times while enduring the divorce from my birth mother at 13yrs old,.....no one has your path but it will come to be, you will see. Now then, what is your next step?

To no one: I hate that you named yourself no one and that you aren't free to express your love openly and honestly. Take some small comfort in knowing that some of us listen and some of us care. Try to live happily whatever path your life takes and remember, you are doing NOTHING wrong. You are the victim of homophobia and you should change your name to Someone!

It broke my heart.

ikr

Me too

Yo saaammee I was just like in my head “run back to him like every love story please”

I know! Just let him walk away through the trees. :(

The mormon programming is intense and he was at his most indoctrinated being on a mission. If he had chosen to abandon his mission and stay he would have had to walk away from his family and entire support system. And likely he would have hated himself. He really took the only reasonable choice. I'm sorry he had to marry before he woke up and got out.

Kinda reminds me of Garfunkel. I like it

Same lol

melvin tayko 😂😂😂😂

melvin tayko 😂

Bless you! I was about to start ugly crying before I read your comment!

YES THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I THOUGHT

Melvin...hahhahhahahahahhaaahahahhaaaaaaaaaaa

It is to be much hoped.

Beautifully said Danny!

Really???? That's crazy cause when I went from atheist to becoming a member of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints, that was my awakening!

@@spazzpopmania5080 you see things differently when you were raised in it. I was Mormon for 25 years.

I agree. Will never go back and have had to overcome sexism, racism, and homophobic ways of thinking to get where i am today. Religion is a disease.

Sometimes leaving religious doctrine is the route to finding yourself, because you now are not living someone else ideal of you but your own. Religion doesn't always bring us together as much as it pushes and keeps us apart.

@@spazzpopmania5080 So did my mom, she converted when she was 14, and believed in it up until this year (She’s 56) She discovered the lies the church told, especially about Joseph Smith. He was just a power hungry pedophile. 30+ wives, some of which being as young as 14. I recommend you research the horrible things he’s done.

Hahaha! I hope so.

Niles Oien Its making me want to quit even more

I've never stopped smoking and I'm still alive!

Tom Clark has a website that continues the story :0)

WithMetta CAN YOU POST A LINK PLS.!? WHAT A BEAUTIFUL TALE OF UNREQUITED LOVE. WOULD MAKE A BRILLIANT CONTEMPORARY MOVIE.

Giovanna Cruz Fritsch He sure didn’t read the part in the Book of Mormon that says “Marriage is between a man and a woman” though. Whatever, he could go ahead and do what he wants I guess.

Giovanna Cruz Fritsch he should be putting them down :)

ΛutistiЄ Probably the book 📚 f mormons was written by a straight guy

@@utisti4976 Yeah why don't we all live according to a single book that should go well

@@elisaagnew5070 A straight guy with "only" 40 wives... (source: www.nytimes.com/2014/11/11/us/its-official-mormon-founder-had-up-to-40-wives.html)

Adam Gardiner those are wise words my friend, & beautifully put too. i agree with your views on love 100%. too bad more people couldnt look at something so obviously beautiful, pure, and absolutely vital to our survival of this human experience as LOVE, & simply see it for what it is. if that were the case, im certain there would be far less of the ugliness & the hatred that we're all constantly force-exposed to on a daily basis. if only everyone could recognize love & simply accept it without feeling the need to try to label it a "sin," cast a dark shadow upon it, hide it/cover it up, warp/twist/pervert it, deny it completely, or try to present is as something its not, something we have to be ashamed of....then the world would be a much better place for all of us. to anyone who actually reads this comment all the way thru, thanks. Namaste. 🙏👌👋🙌

beautiful and true

You are so right. God's silence was his answer. He was trying to tell you, you're feelings were not weird. Love is Love.

Mel Flo You guys are delusional

Krystal Joseph i agree

Yea

Ben Parker I agree with what you wrote about Tom. I doubt if I would have been as charitable when it comes to talking about the mormon religion though.

2326038 Yeah, it’s truly admirable

The Book of Mormon, the awakening,

I want the movie too... 😢

I know how we Italians are, so I know Johnny blew out that Americana culo out with such passion that night. I love these stories, I lived these stories. My story was me from a born again Christian family (Italian American) and a strict Muslim (Kuwaiti American) both of us 20 and feel in love so deep, so strong. We held on to that love for almost a decade, he always told me he would die without me if he had too go back and live a fake like, that one day came and after a couple years of not seeing him and only hearing that he indeed move back per his parent's and died in a traffic accident. How I still long for that love we shared, only he and I knew the strength, value and depth of it.

Tom Clark has a website.

Paul Joseph Berra ..... I'm so sad to hear it turned out so tragic.

If you read the article link it says they are still close friends

taltal milal Haha. AIDS jokes. Certainly not edgy.

KoivuTheHab Gods forbid my autocorrect isn't perfect.

KoivuTheHab Ah, so now a grammar mistake makes me intellectually inferior? Nice to know. I use it for convenience, that's all. Sometimes it doesn't work. No polytheist, just a person that likes adding every deity to the idiom for a change. It's kinda rude to leave out most of them, y'know?

KoivuTheHab So kind of you to be so instructive to all. Certainly sure if your opinions aren't you? But Please remember they are just that YOUR opinions. Please do not presume to inform me and others of what or whom we may believe in. I'm not insisting that you hold any belief system, not an I telling you how you may express yourself. If you check a dictionary you will find that Faith is described as believing in the unseen. My and others faith or lack of us none of your business, this documentary stated that he left the denomination he grew up in it never anywhere said he lost his faith

Thanks Michael, I am amazed at the things you know about me and having your best wishes of happiness makes me even happier. I do not know you but I am sure you are a beautiful person and I wish you a life full of love.

Thanks Gary, I am happy to know that there are people like you in the world, I have done many beautiful things in my life but my masterpiece is my work on my mother who is almost a hundred years old and is fantastic! I've always thought that in life you do not have to regret especially when you love people, I still have a beautiful relationship with my first known love when I was 17, before it happened "elder" and with Tom I'm always in touch and we update on our lives even if we are far away. The smoke of the cigarette is the most negative thing in my life, every day I tell myself that I have to stop, I hope to get up one morning and never smoke again I promise you that I will do my best. Gary I'm glad to meet you, I wish you so much happiness

Giovanni Intrevado what a beautiful couple you two made! Wonder why you guys didn’t reunite after your missionary work and find your unique love story where you left it and live happily ever after ... hope you found happiness ! Best Cecilia

@@giovanniintrevado6246 You are a beautiful soul inside and outside. Much love to you from Pakistan.

How nice to know that there are people like you in the world. So much love for you from Pescara

Why did you though?

@@prithakshrestha I got into my dream school and it was an opportunity I couldn't pass up

how about now? did you guys meet

@@user-gv2pk6sf8n we're still together doing long distance. Its hard but worth it

This is so beautifully told. Thank you!

I love your profile picture. Hush hush is awesome.

Snaggle Toothed Yes

dillon lynch I know What u mean but dont you think Its Just special as it is

dillon lynch there is a trilogy and I believe it is based on this story. It’s really good, you should check it out. The first movie is called The Falls.

I think not so much. As a documentary short it works just fine. As a scripted narrative feature, no major studio would fund it, though maybe someone could convince Netflix. And really, as a scripted feature, too much of the story would get changed to make a "more compelling" drama for the masses.

Call Me By Your Name is like this!

Noooooo

Then change your thought process. Happiness is a choice, just as unhappiness is.

Norma Ray congratulations u cured sadness !!

kristal fisher Bwcbw

That was the same thing i asked myself

Same here. I'll travel the whole of Italy one day to heal myself.

What does “Bwcbw” mean?

Stephanie Tannis the photos and videos were taken with consent in Europe during the 70s(?). I don’t know but I don’t think consent in posting matters at this point.

In reply I think the fact that he has left his comments here about his art, his smoking and his mother shows that he not only was aware of this video but approved it be shown. My blessings to two very brave men long may your friendship continue

There's a follow-up article that says they're still friends, so yeah.

Justin O'Rear 🙄

Wow so Call me By Your Name is more common than we think lol

You must live the present not the possible future!

Dearest futuristic monster. We have one life brother. Use it wisely. Godspeed! 🇦🇺 ❤

futuristic monster I pray for you ... I hope you have a happy ending!

And how did it ended? I'm really curious

How does one pull so much emotion in 13 minutes. I think because we've all got our own, secret, wistful love story in there somewhere we can relate to this guys story so deeply. Or is it in his own unique way of telling. I'm not sure, but this story bit me on a visceral level. Thank you for sharing it. Could do with a bit of love today! 😊

Cuéntame tu historia

Live your life how you want it, and dont be afraid of those who dont accept for they arent important

I know many people who have left the church. It's not something you have to "escape" from. You can just not come to church anymore and that's fine. There is the FLDS which is an unsanctioned branch-off of the Mormon (LDS) church that still practices polygamy. That religion is disgusting and members do have to "escape". Was that what this guy was a part of? What were the conditions around helping this guy?

@@kaityoar9125 Maybe that guy was higher up in the chain or was family member of someone important to the church. As is with any religion, the higher you are on the chain, the more difficult it is to get out, some are even threatened for their lives if they try to renounce their religion, I am thinking this is a similar case.

I know you’re lying

That's FLDS (they are just weird). I'm a Mormon(LDS) and I know we would never do that

Slytherin Queen I’m sorry but y’all do do that. There are thousands of documentaries. Look up “ I escaped the Mormon church” or “ why I escaped the Mormon church”

same 😞

Nathan Glenn it’s basically the same. You can only be alone when in the bathroom or president interviews. You know, so you keep the “good” Jesus thoughts

@@ricobuttonpusher7061 absolutely insane, I would get socially exausted from a week of constantly being around people at summer camp, let alone for 2 year to be free advertisement for a cult.

I just looked it up. They've maintained a deep friendship internationally, even though Tom now lives with a partner. He left the Mormon church apparently.

Kai Sea Thank you for the update. I am glad they are friends, also that he has left the "church" that indoctrinated him. Heartbreaking, but beautiful.

He has a website that answers that question :0)

Kai Sea thank tou

What the deal with gays having an age gap between them?

I'm a writer, and I think this would make an amazing piece of literary nonfiction. If you ever want to share your story, hit me up.

Wow, hi Gianni! (Kind of amazing to hear from you, honestly.) I was actually commenting on Chris Vandevert's original comment about his own experiences - however, I'm glad you reached out! This video is Tom's story, but I have no doubt your side of it is no less compelling. If you've ever be interested in sharing it, I'd love to talk to you.

No problem! I'm glad for the mix-up! I've found you on Facebook and sent a message, so feel free to contact me there.

the history of the communist is stupid. In Italy there have never been communists as you mean Americans, surely I would not have given my vote to Trump, I am a progressive and not a conservative.

Sometimes you need to have a love that doesn't last.

@@MsAdlerHolmes -- Watching this film, to me, shows that this love still exists.

me too....

@@MsAdlerHolmes -- Absolutely on one needs that ...no one!

There's a good chance that he would have been shamed and/or disowned by his Mormon family and friends. He probably decided he didn't want to risk that.

Grazie!

This is why Christianity would be better off as a spirituality than a religion.

Yes, I had no choice of religion as a child. It was framed as a choice but it never was.

@@aj_us There is no free will when you serve an angry judgemental fearful god. If you are an 8 year old child terrified of admitting to your headteacher that you didn't attend mass on Sunday for fear of his anger or punishment. The same good Catholic headteacher who loved to keep his hands warm inside the pants of good little Catholic girls in the primary school I attended. Having swollen knuckles from the ruler strikes because I was left handed and caught writing with my left hand always resulted in several knuckle strikes with the ruler. Being made to stand on a chair and be humiliated by an entire classroom, lead by a good catholic spinster teacher, because my mother cut my hair short. And now everytime I visit my fathers grave that damned woman sits in the grave next to him, her carved out name clear to see to remind me of the travesties endured in that school. Is this a Victorian novel? Nope, it's a Catholic Cheshire school I and my 5 siblings attended in 60's and early 70's. That was my comforting catholic upbringing. NOT!!

@@aj_us No Annie, I agree it wasn't God but it was Catholic designated behaviour. I know people my age who never experienced such brutality throughout their school years either. I accept it is not everybody's experience of course but nevertheless it was mine and my siblings. As an interesting final comment, I equally attended a very forward and liberal thinking comprehensive secondary school, also Catholic.

Priests fall in love with young boys. How simple and pure. Makes me choke up, it’s so beautiful

Hello Misza, I wish you to be happy in your life, now we are in a different time since 1974 and many things have changed. I hope you will find a person worthy of you!

I think movie title is ...call me by my name

watch call me by your name and you can experience a similar story of an American doctrate student visiting an Italian family in Crema, where he meets Elio. They fall in love, yet there were so many boundaries...the rest of the story is very similar to this one too. There is a book of the same name describing the same if you want to read that!

Yes! Sadly I know from experience that if most Christians were to say that or anything else in favour of LGBTQ+ people, the other "Christians" would verbally attack them. It confuses and angers me to no end. It'd be so much easier if Christianity were a spirituality only but instead it's a religion and so many have turned it into a cult and of course there's what I call mini cults. I've had people tell me I'm wrong when I say that love is for everyone regardless of gender. It's one of the worst feelings I've ever felt but I won't give up.

SamiiChan what did God and Jesus want? For all of us to love each other and respect each other no matter what. Love is suppose to be above hate, not the other way around! People seem to forget that :(

@@save_the_bees While im an atheist exmormon I do think its ridiculous how much they claim to worship and follow a loving god yet tear people down for not following their cult's rules

Secular free thinkers have always (for decades anyway) accepted lgbt people and don’t need any bible mythology.

Sæþór Benjamin b

Yes!!

:(

What really

Hello, I'm Gianni from the movie "elder", you wrote a nice and right comment, you're definitely a special person, so thanks to you!

@@giovanniintrevado6246 ...bless you for writing...your story is timeless...be well...and be happy...