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ADHD COACH EXPLAINS 👉 Procrastination & why "holding yourself accountable" never works 

Caren Magill | ADHD Coach + Multipotentialite
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28 окт 2024

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Комментарии : 50   
@legiontheatregroup
@legiontheatregroup 11 месяцев назад
It is often not that there are no consequences, but rather that the consequence of not taking action will not manifest immediately.
@allthingstealee
@allthingstealee 11 месяцев назад
Exactly! Or theres no consequence if I don’t do it now, I can always do it later (but then the same thing keeps happening where you say later)
@thoubias
@thoubias 10 месяцев назад
Delayed and/or accumulatory. You know you are gonna gwt the boot if you don't do enough, but it is hard to gauge if no one ever says you anything about your output.
@SS-in1ts
@SS-in1ts 10 месяцев назад
Yep
@jasoncolap
@jasoncolap 10 месяцев назад
Yep time distortion
@Michelle-js5kh
@Michelle-js5kh 9 месяцев назад
Right, these are big projects for work that are due at a specific time. The advice to simply not do it until it’s interesting to me means I delay the work until I don’t have enough time to do it well. I NEED to be able to manufacture interest in these projects, not just say I can focus on something I like. I just spent all weekend working on an annual report I have had on my desk for 3 weeks but didn’t start until the day it was due. It is now late. Done, but late. And I feel shame that my weekend was spent doing that when I had all this time before. Guess why it got pushed off? Cause I focused on all the interesting things in my life instead. And here we are. This is the problem I need help solving, and I feel like it was missed here.
@rustyshackelford3109
@rustyshackelford3109 11 месяцев назад
The thing with adhd is you don’t know the thing you are not doing is because you don’t want to do it or because you just have a hard time with getting started and keep yourself accountable
@TabithaWanjiku06
@TabithaWanjiku06 11 месяцев назад
How to beat procrastination 1. Intrinsic motivation 2. purpose - for self and greater good 3. Motivational interviewing - on a scale of 1 - 10 how motivated. If its not 0, what is motivating about the task. If 0, why are you doing it? HPA axis - nervous+endocrine system - generates cortisol to do tasks. Not motivated - not enough cortisol to do the thing even if you have the energy for it. If task is big - too much cortisol so you freeze. Its not about the task. What is it about the task in you that makes the task not motivating. What do you need to change either about yourself or how you see yourself to do the thing. How can you talk yourself into it. So why the hell are you doing this thing in the first place? Leave tasks you have not interested in doing and dont need to. Self awareness is important. I learn better when taking notes. This was amazing. Thank you
@floridanativelh568
@floridanativelh568 11 месяцев назад
So is your synopsis. Wonderful and so appreciated. Thank you😊
@renee6770
@renee6770 11 месяцев назад
Yes! Same
@LibbyAnn026
@LibbyAnn026 10 месяцев назад
I learn better when I read well taken notes. Thanks 😉
@AllThingsConsidered333
@AllThingsConsidered333 10 месяцев назад
I appreciate your notes and it helps me to retain the info as well. Thanks!
@wendipoole4949
@wendipoole4949 10 месяцев назад
Thank you for making the note! I need notes to read and reread again and again, but ugh…either I feel I have no time or something else is more pressing. When I do make notes, I forget about it, forget to look for it and/or can’t find it. Thank you!❤
@Heyu7her3
@Heyu7her3 11 месяцев назад
I'm one of those that achieves by getting an "essential worker" job. We crave/ need urgency, & thrive in jobs that require us to think on our feet/ make a quick decision. Being a classroom teacher helped immensely with executive functioning & regulation while providing me with a level of autonomy. I was on-time because I HAD to be. I did all my work at school/ rarely took it home because I would be wayyy too cognitively exhausting once I'd get home. Also helped SO SO much with boundaries -- both setting them & enforcing them. Finally, I was able to see more instant gratification, which helped with the dopamine. My emotions were still difficult to regulate _(mostly due to childhood trauma)_ but at least I didn't take it personally.
@theotherway1639
@theotherway1639 11 месяцев назад
Often we work hard to avoid what we really want to do at our core. I like the little book called 30 Days to Overcome Procrastination by Corin Devaso, it uses mindfulenss and takes an interesting approach. Rushing is another form of going nowhere, it's often the case we need to slow way down to establish meaning and purpose.
@CarenMagill
@CarenMagill 10 месяцев назад
I love that. I'm going to check out that book. Thx!
@KMc-cw3qt
@KMc-cw3qt 10 месяцев назад
I think it was Jon Kabat-Zinn who said “we’re not human doings we’re human beings.” Non-striving 👍
@hansonel
@hansonel 11 месяцев назад
This is really helpful since I was trying to hold myself accountable and even thought "forcing" myself to do things I didn't want to do would work... it rarely works and makes not want to do the thing even more. Dr. K is amazing BTW.
@sylviaskinner6849
@sylviaskinner6849 10 месяцев назад
I just found you a couple of days ago, you have given me hope. My thing is I am 64 years old and have a garage full of stuff. I don’t wanna go through that has been there for years. i’m going to start on it today. Thanks!! On a sidenote, what lipstick are you wearing? ❤
@barbyoungberg
@barbyoungberg 11 месяцев назад
I tried to attend networking events 2 or 3 times and determined that I will never do it again! Thank you for the different perspective on holding myself accountable, I now know better. BTW...Dr K is awesome!
@KeanuReevolution
@KeanuReevolution 4 месяца назад
This is truly amazing, thank you! Also appreciate how kind you are and accommodating with eastern philosophies too :)
@kimfroman2023
@kimfroman2023 4 месяца назад
Your hair is beautiful. I am 4 hours late for work watching videos on procrastination. The job isn't due until tomorrow ...
@davidthomaswright
@davidthomaswright 5 месяцев назад
This is so helpful!! A really clever way to test whether something has any core value for you .
@Naturalsoaprecipes
@Naturalsoaprecipes 11 месяцев назад
Your videos are so much nicer without all the images.. more engaging ❤
@md82892
@md82892 10 месяцев назад
Here is a 5 bullet point summary of the key points from the video: - If you don't have enough intrinsic motivation or sense of purpose for a task, question why you are doing it in the first place. - Try to find tasks that provide either intrinsic motivation or a sense of purpose. If not, it may not be worth your time and energy. - Use "motivational interviewing" to uncover any small amounts of motivation you may have for a task. Build on those to generate more interest. - Make sure a task is neither too boring nor too overwhelming for your current mindset and identity. Adjust your perspective if needed. - Rather than forcing accountability, focus your energy on what genuinely interests you. True accountability comes from self-awareness about your motivations.
@wellbeing-warriors
@wellbeing-warriors 11 месяцев назад
Notion! I love it, but just cannot get into a habit of using it 😜🙃
@bedhead-studio
@bedhead-studio 11 месяцев назад
I watched that episode and found it so helpful!!!!
@sharilee4412
@sharilee4412 10 месяцев назад
Good video except . . What I want to do, I want more than anything to do. Home improvement, refinishing furniture, making home decor, etc. i have lots of ideas, too many ideas, but to get started is overwhelming. I am not sure what I am doing, I may have fear of failure, but the real issue is i have come to a point where I avoid anything that is overwhelming. After a very stressful day at work, I really just want to hide. Watch tv. Do something passive. I usual am pretty good with anything I actually do, and the only way to get good at anything is with practice. I think I have the ability to do amazing work, but I cannot face the possibility of anything that seems overwhelming. I also do not want to do anything unless I have a good amt of time, yet I never have a good amount of time.
@neviestix
@neviestix 11 месяцев назад
So looking at the original question about turning in a proposal without consequences of the proposal being received late. If there is nothing in it for the writer of the proposal and they just don't want to do it, then they just don't do the proposal and do something else. Pah! Fine if you are self employed. Not ok if you work for someone else. 😮
@prashantm3796
@prashantm3796 11 месяцев назад
Do you have any trick to get into hyperfocus or trigger sense of urgency?
@unclemick-synths
@unclemick-synths 10 месяцев назад
For me, I use music to help me hyperfocus. Depending on the day it could be calming or energizing music. In the office I use headphones but at home I can crank it up when necessary.
@goosecreekcommunitylandtru8080
@goosecreekcommunitylandtru8080 9 месяцев назад
Thanks!
@CarenMagill
@CarenMagill 9 месяцев назад
thank you!!
@oobik_design
@oobik_design 10 месяцев назад
Love the content - it's great to call out other producers (I'm a Huberman fan too) to support your points. I hate to ask, but what does your shirt say in this video? It's unreasonably agitating for me that the writing never completely visible 😆
@desirée92
@desirée92 11 месяцев назад
Omg..... your top is fabulous!!!! Do you mind sharing where you found it? Also, great content in this video! 🎉
@CarenMagill
@CarenMagill 10 месяцев назад
Thank you! The sweatshirt was from Walmart! A few years ago....
@gillrobinson3517
@gillrobinson3517 9 месяцев назад
My problem is that even with serious consequences (like losing money or friends, etc), i still will procrastinate. How do i make myself do tasks that i really don't want to?!
@CarenMagill
@CarenMagill 9 месяцев назад
The same rules apply.
@jasoncolap
@jasoncolap 10 месяцев назад
Interesting
@leigholding1397
@leigholding1397 11 месяцев назад
I have to go to work.. my job Laboring construction isn't something I look forward to.. it's a means to an end... I've stayed in a job way to long and had a mental breakdown. Seeing demons.. cutting wrist.. there is no way I'm going there again... No job is worth it to take ya life ... leave b4 that ...
@lv4tmnt90
@lv4tmnt90 3 месяца назад
I wach Dr K 🎉
@Rawomnivore
@Rawomnivore 10 месяцев назад
😢Surprisingly unhelpful. MOST of the time your videos are very useful and thought provoking, but this video doesnt answer the person's question. It dodges it. There are things that NEED to be done, that the only motivation to do them is not to suffer. Maybe the consequences don't come immediately or maybe they come but are not clearly directly linked to the specific inaction, but they come and when they do they are painful, so you do the thing, but doing the thing SUCKS! You put it off, over and over, the dread builds up and makes doing yhe thing even harder to do, until you hit a point at which there WILL be consequences and bad ones and soon, so you have to rush and the stress of it just makes everything EVEN WORSE. There is no amount of well, i could find some intrinsic motivation to do the thing before it gets to that for those situations and tasks, and that where i (we) need help. How do we find the motivation not to give in to the temptation of procrastination when stuff that MUST be done, cant be changed into something we like better, and isnt urgent is on our plate? I want to avoid the stress, that is my motivation, but it is a terrible motivation and it barely works. I (we) need guidance to something better. 🙏🏽
@CarenMagill
@CarenMagill 10 месяцев назад
Thanks for the feedback! I can only share what I know, which isn't always going to be enough. What would you suggest to this person? I'm open to hearing other feedback.
@jenniferhizzy6591
@jenniferhizzy6591 11 месяцев назад
Because it is painfully boring ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
@star.light-306
@star.light-306 9 месяцев назад
Wow that interviewing technique is annoyingly helpful.
@GilliMarieMoody
@GilliMarieMoody 11 месяцев назад
Hi. (1.) Your volume changed suddenly right after your intro. (2.) Your video? There are lots and lots and LOTS of times when there’s no motivation whatsoever re something that still absolutely, positively has to be done-and in a timely manner to boot. At these times, DISCIPLINE is almost always the key. (3.) A networking event can usually accomplished within a preset time frame. So, NO overthinking about it is necessary. I feel that much of your video was about overthinking. (Trust that I am highly knowledgeable about this topic😉🥰.) Cheers.
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