Society demonizes not caring - even though people who care about everything have crippling, anxiety, low self-esteem, a loud inner-critic and inevitably burnout.
Me too. Never really realized it could be caused by my adhd. I love sewing and crafting, but I can't seem to get myself motivated to do any projects for money. My motivation for wanting to do a project, is always for family/friends. So my motivation is love.
I use what I call my “TA-DONE!” list. It’s a quick and messy handwritten list of what I’ve done. I include *everything* that I would have beaten myself up about had I not done it, so yeah, sometimes “brushed my teeth” makes the list! Traditional to-do lists tend to drain my energy and can be overwhelming, but “TA-DONE!” lists get me rolling into action and help me seek out tasks to complete so I can keep the wins going. The feeling is similar to what you describe when marking an X on your calendar. For some reason, it only works for me if it’s literally scribbled by hand, ideally with brightly colored pens. Writing neatly, using proper grammar, or typing it somehow kills the vibe.
- Get clear on next steps (and where are dependency - Put things in a Calendar or planning tools that are used every day - Outsourcing accountability (todo lists etc) - Celebrate the things we do well - Take ntentional breaks
I can honestly say you are the most likeable person on RU-vid and possibly the nicest. Your genuine empathy oozes from your skin and you do not look like someone who's here to make a career or money, it actually looks like those are secondary and wanting to help others was first because of what it was like for you scrambling around in the dark for so long. 🙏🏽
I just discovered you while searching for help with clutter if your a woman with adhd. I remember realizing and writing down at 19 that my problem was consistency. Wasn’t diagnosed until I was 32 and now at 55 I’ve learned much during my journey. A lot of it I forget and relearn many times over 😂. Love hearing how others approach life on the daily and I’m glad I found you. ❤
I love that they are many people like me out here experiencing the same ugh I’m so tired of not being consistent and it’s not like don’t want to 😅 thank you for this video please don’t stop making them
Holy cow I’m so glad I saw this video today! I’ve watched it 2x and will watch again tomorrow to take notes. I love your content. It’s succinct and makes so much sense without shame or judgment. Thank you!
Not only did I feel you on the 26 hr days but they aren't even productive, for me, it's just 26 hr days of stressing and worrying how I have 12083 ideas but can't seem to pick or start any then just giving up.
Oh my goodness.. im watching the second video and I already feel like you are changing my life for the better. I love the way you speak and explain things. I have never understood what was going on in my brain- having all these interests and talents and not being able to be consistent with any to manifest my dreams has been very saddening. I finally see some hope at the end of the tunnel. Thank you!!!
👋 i hope you're safe over there? I hope this year brings happiness prosperity love and peace 💞❤️🕊️🕊️ all over the world 🙏🌍 I'm originally from Canada currently living in Key West Florida☀️☀️☀️☀️and you where are you from if i may ask??.
I'm seeing this two years hence, but I applaud this move. I wish more podcasters would take breaks, rather than just force out content. I'd rather have "occasional and brilliant" than constant and mediocre.
Visualize what “done” looks like! “How would I love this room to look like?” That’s when I can start putting away all the things that don’t belong on the kitchen table…. ❤️
ohmygod please never stop making videos! this is smth i struggle with so much, just like so many others, and i can’t express how much of a difference your videos make! thank you for making me feel like i’m not alone in this!
I love so much about these tips, especially the explanation of why it is necessary to celebrate completion, from a cognitive and identity-building standpoint - I feel like this will be priceless for me, as I never really placed importance on that (if I actually managed to complete something, that is) - thanks so much!
Focus on one thing at a time. Decide what you’re going to say No to. Know the “Why” behind your why. Be clear on what “done” looks like. Avoid magical thinking. Calendar block your time. Celebrate completion. Take intentional breaks.
There is a part she says we're people pleasers. I don't know if that's how ADHD works in different people.But I am a nanny to a little 5 year old boy who was diagnosed with adhd. The last thing that he is is a people pleaser.He will.literally do everything in his power to make sure he pleases only himself.He doesn't just do this with me,but with his parents and everyone around me.
I think that tip about choosing one thing at a time is about to change my life. I LOVED j-term in college and always soaked up and continue to apply those concepts much more than any of my 4 multiple course semesters….. like I genuinely get sad in January now because I don’t have that anymore. And you just made me realize that I can create my own and explore my interests effectively. THANK YOU.
Omg, i did all those things. Five majors (would change every time they tried to make me take math), always listening to other people's "shoulds" even if they were just in my head. Now, at 54, im facing really commit to my not-very-good job or quit and try what I actually want to do. I don't regret my scattershot education, and I don't regret my years teaching since, but I am fairly sure I need to be done with it. (just terrified my ADHD brain won't let me succeed at those things, sigh. Sigh.
Well covered! 😂 now to get all that done hahaha. I needed a different video to help deal with all this progress task 😂 by bucketing part by part and by ruling principle values to actionable desirable actions
It was at about the <a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="330">5:30</a> mark that I said “Caren has a microchip in my brain and is reporting on everything I go through.” I don’t have a diagnosis, but it’s finally time to seek that out. Tired of living this way.
Fun fact, everyone who does have ADD or ADH. D as an adult, it's not always a people pleaser. Or tries to be a people pleaser or wants to be a people pleaser. I just need help with consistency, and I don't want to be labeled.As such this is f****** annoying
God bless you Caren!! God brought me to this channel for a reason! And I'm so happy about it. This is about the best video you have posted! GOLD complete GOLD!
I've already started 2 more businesses on top of one that isn't doing so good. Now my weaknesses are out there for everyone to see coz I can't deliver well to everyone.
It's hard for me to set goals and work on accomplishing because I need instant and consistent feedback or "dopamine increase" for me to start motivated. That's why it's hard to lose weight because I need to see and feel some positive results daily instead of weekly or monthly. I'll get initially excited, but soon lose the excitement which decreases my motivation. Any and all feedback is welcomed.
Omg why are you calling me out? Putting things on a calender and then forget to look at it. Oh all the unused calenders and planners I've had in my life..
<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="594">9:54</a> You say you'll link some videos on how you plan your weeks months and quarters, but I can't seem to find any video links in the description for those things? Could you please provide those resource links? Struggling to stay organized. Thank you!
Okay but do you take adhd medication because lists are my fucking problem. 😂 it’s the execution of the list. Even with intention I go for a week and then… BAM I stop, and I don’t even realize I did.
Listening to the part about knowing why behind your why i just remember dumping my midnight thoughts in my notes 3 years back and writing “do we really love the things we love or is it because of the people around us”. I am starting research on ADHD because when someone explains how ADHD works i just feel like they’re explaining the inner me 😭😭 i reallyy wanna deal with it right now but not sure if i am interested in it tomorrow 🥲🥲
Ughhh the thing I’m so tired of and disappointing myself is the only thing I have is school not even proper school that I have to go school, all I have to do is study and take my exam and I set a schedule for my studies every day to what time I be studying and all that guess what I did that for one week and the next week I couldn’t even get up early, all my plans the whole - non , spent the rest of the week on bed and as the day goes by all I’m thinking is what I could’ve done. I keep asking myself what is it and my conclusion was I felt like I’m doing a chore and mundane and there is no excitement and I get that not every day is holiday but I like spontaneity , I like when I don’t plan on reading or studying and all of the sudden I get captured and finish the book and that feeling is the best. I don’t know,I just need help, beat this and take my exam. Please anybody help?
1.Simplify - Say No (Unrealistic Expectation) pick 1 thing at a time 2.Choose - Decide what u say no. so that u create ur working space which is needed for realising ur dreams 3.Motivate- Know ur why behind ur why. Write it down. 4. Visualize ur Product. Write it down in detail 5. Concretize ur Magical Thinking phase. write it down. Till here, was for DECIDE what u WANT 6. PLAN - Operationalize ur Priorities WHAT, WHO, HOW 7. EXECUTE - Put them on the Calendar WHERE, WHEN 8. CHECK - Externalize Accountability 9. PARTY TIME 😊 - Celebrate it. Look at wht u got it done. CONFIDENCE STUFF 10. DESERVE. U deserve taking BREAKS.
