I always thought having a crush wasn't actually a thing people did and just an exaggeration. I also thought sending nudes was a meme for a very long while. Yeah I had that proven wrong in a way that was extremely uncomfortable.
Hah. I thought that's what everyone was doing and it weirded me out. I was too much an odd duck to begin with to 'play along' and consequently received a lot of head scratching and the usual "Everyone likes SOMEONE" comments.
Thiiiis!! There was basically a corkboard in my mind with thumbtacks and strings all trying to figure out what the socially acceptable answer to "so who do you like?" or "Who's your celebrity crush?" was. For celebs, I ended up either saying I liked fairly obscure British actors or giving what I'm pretty sure is the most demisexual answer of all time, "I want to marry Samwise Gamgee." 😆
It is also traditional to present asexual people with cake when they come out. (It's an old tradition from the mid 2000s online ace culture on the AVEN forums, where people would respond to new aces coming out with cake related image replies, and has continued to now be cake gifs, emojis, ect. Cake is also an appropriate coming out gift for aces irl, too.)
As a kid I thought “liking” people was necessary and now I know that I’m a little older I understand. I find people attractive, but I don’t feel romantic attraction until I know the other person thinks I’m attractive as well. It’s hard to explain. Basically I just don’t feel attracted until I feel it back I guess?
that sounds familiar to demiromantic or grayromantic but what feels best to you is best, and you don’t need a label if you don’t want one! pick your poison friend :)
I think i heared about something similar to this. So i share Recipromantic: someon who does not experienc romantic attraction unless they know that the other person is romanticaly attracted to them first. Hope this helps😊
As pretty much everyone else replying to this, I also think this sounds something on the aroace spectrum, I’m not the one to tell you how to identify yourself, and neither is anyone else but yourself, but I hope you find an identity you feel comfortable with! :D
Fun story! My great aunt (who’s in her 70s) asked me what asexual meant. I explained and she realized that she’s actually ace. She had been in few romantic relationships and was never interested in a sexual relationship. This proves that asexuality isn’t just a new trend or whatever
I think maybe for some ace people in the past, like Mediaeval Europe, it made joining a religious order a particularly good choice- & since chastity was so highly regarded, some ace people may have been admired for that... not that ace people invariably want 100% lifetime chastity, but not being "tormented by the demon of lust" would have been seen as a good thing- even tho LGBT _identities_ in general didn't exist, LGBT _people_ obviously did...
@@wordforger That's really interesting! I seem to recall he wasn't a fan of women & marriage- was he the guy who said "better to marry than to burn, but better not to marry at all"?
@@wordforger Yeah, like most historical figures, the _concept_ of asexuality didn't exist for him to think about, & if we time-travelled & explained it in a morally neutral way, we can't know if he'd say "yep, that's me", but even tho I'm very tentative about such things, what he said sounds a _lot_ like asexuality (note: I'm not ace), & it's easy to imagine him identifying as ace today (apart from the prejudice Christianity often has against LGBT+ people.)
Have just realised my sexuality (asexuality) at 50. So wish all of these memes (and discussion) had been around when I was younger. My life would have made so much more sense!
The cake thing is literally just. cake is good. I don’t want sex. I want cake. Same thing with garlic bread and dragons. Edit: I’m a disgrace to the ace-spec community. I forgot space and plants.
Should've realized I was ace when I went to the library and said "do you guys have any books without romance?" And this lady legit comes back with 12 WW2 books. What... Crazy just how much unnecessary romance books and movies have
Right?! Books, movies, songs?! I can enjoy a good tragic romance, but in every story? Can the will they won't they friends ever just stay friends? Does the super hero need to also fall in love?
I mean, I did find a WW2 book with a little bit of romance... like, a character had a crush on the main character, but he didn't reciprocate, he just found her kinda creepy and went on with the story
"So I'm thinking of these two intellectual 1900s women bucking social norms by going into science, but also being really emotionally close..." "Eh, a period piece about smart secret lesbians? Kinda cliche, isn't it?" "No, that's it, they're close... Just friends." "IMPOSSIBLE"
Just for those who wanted a copy paste Being asexual is like being born without a sense of smell but everywhere you go people are spraying perfume in your face and when you ask them to stop and tell them it’s irritating and you can’t smell the perfume anyway they get huffy and respond with “don’t lie to me; I can clearly see you have a nose. Everybody has a nose and therefore everybody smells things and besides maybe you just haven’t found the right scent yet”. And then you want to scream.
Seriously this is my family at me. But also, it isn’t just Ace who get this spiel sadly, Aro people get it too and it’s extremely annoying when your Aro/Ace so you suffer with both sides.
I mean... it is tho. So much so when I was younger I was worried I wasn't actually ace, but just really liked the flag and blurred the two together for that reason. Turns out, yep, Ace as hell and Aro to boot.
Ok, but the idea of “dating” app for ace people is such a good idea, considering how most “regular” app of this kind are filled with sexual offers to the point that ace people can’t feel comfortable.
There are ace dating apps, but there’s not enough people using them for there to be much success. I looked at one and in my area there were only a few people on it and none of them had a romantic orientation that aligned, that’s before getting to if we even had any common interests. I wonder how many ace people have just given up on romantic interest as well.
@@katiecrooked instead of giving up, since I've never even met another ace irl, I just got used to sex. It's not really my thing and I wish it didn't take that much time in a relationship, but it's kinda interesting in a weird way and I now can definitely bear it.
@@katiecrooked And that's why I'm glad that the big dating apps now allow you to select "asexual" as a sexuality. Hasn't helped me on the apps at all, but it's a start. I found another ace on Hinge, but they never responded either, so you run into the same things anyway.
As the only son of conservative (albeit not entirely close-minded) parents, I've never truly been able to think about gender and other socially relevant topics until a very small number of years ago. This channel, which I discovered only recently, has been helping me quite a lot to understand the nuances of gender and related subjects. Watching this video in particular, made me 100% sure that I'm under the asexual umbrella. Seriously, Jammi, words cannot express how grateful I am to you, for helping me to better understand both the world and myself 😁 P.S Sorry for the long comment, but the happier I am, the more I write 😌
@@underthetable73 After five long months of self-discovery, not even I relate to the "son" part, at least not as much as I did when I wrote the original comment! Speaking of writing, I'm about to write A LOT of stuff down below, because I'm eager to share with you (and anyone else, really) some information that I learned in the past half year, and might help you in your own journey. Please read if you have the time and energy to do so: I have Asperger's, so I tend to get "a little" wordy and overexcited when I write/talk about things I like 😅 -------------------------------------------------- I've been identifying as nonbinary (they/he) for the past few months, partly because of RU-vidrs (in particular Jammi, One Topic at a Time, Lilly Alexander and Kross), but also because of books on History, Anthropology and other subjects. The main takeaway I got from all of those books and videos, as well from many other past experiences, was that identities are always changing. That being said, it's totally ok to doubt yourself from time to time and experiment using (privately or in public) different labels of gender, sexuality etc. to refer to yourself, even if you end up discarding them later. In the end, what matters is that, eventually, you learn to accept your own fluidity and start living in relative peace with yourself, never losing the drive to improve, but trying just as hard to make sure it doesn't turn into Impostor Syndrome. That philosophy (which I'm struggling to successfully implement in my daily life, but at least I'm trying) is kind of why I chose nonbinary as my current gender label: it's my way to remind myself that identities are neither black-and-white nor set in stone, while also relieving myself from a huge chunk of that socially constructed urge we all have (and will always have, to some extent) to live according to arbitrary standards of masculinity, femininity etc. That's just my take on the matter, though. Please, do both of us a favor, and be yourself. Warm greetings from Brazil 🤗
@@sidereaper2810 I do plan to write for a living: I'm a History undergrad, and my goal is to write books, papers, brochures etc. that'll entertain and educate people at the same time. I want my readers to engage with the past, and with the lessons we can learn from it, as much as I do! 😁
Cake is the oldest asexual symbol for 'sex is cool and all, but have you tried ___?' Basically aces would rather have cake than sex in every instance lol. One that came after that was dragons. Why have sex when you could have a DRAGON or why be sexual when you could be a badass dragon? More recently, garlic bread has become an ace symbol. Garlic bread is very much better than sex. Black rings are a sign of asexuality within the community. Worn on the middle of the right hand, it means you're asexual. Worn on the middle of the left, it shows you're asexual and aromantic. It's a cool way to find fellow aces in the wild.
I would like to know how to tell people im grayace and grayaro with a possibility of demi Because I dont want to completely say that ill never have a romantic/sexual relationship
@@nicomoist5336 thats alright! Some people spend their whole lives just learning more about themself! Personally i believe at this point that Im Demisexual
Friendly reminder that being ace doesn’t mean you hate sex, it means a lack of attraction. You can be ace and have a high libido, or be bisexual and have a low libido and be sex repulsed. It just happens that ace people are more commonly sex repulsed than any other Orientations.
Me: pan and not a fan of sex. Or should I say: the idea of having sex brings me anxiety and even makes me feel physically ill. For me, this mostly comes from trauma, having been forced too often to count, having sex thrown in my face at any time without warning, without consent, and without even waiting until I was old enough for it. I can imagine this might happen to asexuals too, especially when people try to "cure them" or "prove asexuality isn't real" Even just reading about these things happening can traumatise people, so I'm not surprised that it's so common in the ace community.
I like to compare it to hunger and appetite. Libido is like hunger a purely physical reaction of your body asking for certain things. Sexual attraction and appetite are your body not necessarily needing those things, but you mentally want them. Sometimes hunger goes without appetite (standing in front of the fridge, hungry, but not really wanting to eat anything) and appetite without hunger (just having eaten, but that desert just looks awesome). And the same goes for libido and sexual attraction. You can have one without having the other.
@@MissEarthling unfortunately, it's very common for people who were AFAB to experience these things. I'm much better now, though. Learning where this trauma comes from has helped me move on from my past, and makes me want to fight for young people everywhere to not have to go through the same things I went through.
To add to the perfume analogy, being demi is kinda like that, except one day someone you care about deeply makes their own perfume and suddenly you can smell it, but only that specific perfume. And then everyone sees this and starts spraying more perfume in your face saying "See? You could smell all along!" but you still can't smell any of their perfumes. It's just the one made by the person you care about and you still really wish everyone else would stop spraying other perfumes in your face.
As a grayace, it's like this: You can't smell perfume 99.999% of the time, but the .0001% you DO smell it, people tell you that you could smell it all along.
the "YES GET THAT D QUEEN- wait no" conversation is exactly one i would have with my best friend,, like she has no clue but she is sooo supportive all the time! ps asexual people are valid! 💜
Heterosexual: You're standing on one leg Homosexual: You're standing on the other Bisexual: You're standing on both Pansexual: You're lying on the ground Asexual: You're levitating Basically, asexuals are magical. Thank you for coming to my TedTalk.
Sexualities as doors Heterosexual: door swings one way Homosexual: door swings the other way Bisexual: door swings both ways Pansexual: revolving door Demisexual: door is locked, one person has key Asexual: door is automatic Asexual/Aromantic: door is actually a wall edit: spell check didn't know demisexual >:( edit 2: changed asexual, added asexual/aromantic (thanks @ThouArtWhatThouArt !)
Reminder that ace people can still experience romantic attraction! So for the door analogy, you could just say that for ace people, the door is automatic; it doesn't require touch to let you in :) And then aroace would be the wall!
ON CAKE AND RINGS: the ace community chose a ring like 15 years ago to represent our orientations and like signal others - a black ring on the middle finger of the right hand :) As for cake, we just have jokes about how we’d rather eat cake than have sex, also dragons are a thing - we get more excited about dragons than sex, and a strong love of garlic bread is also just starting to come through... 😂
Important: not all asexual people experience absolutely no sexual attraction. I experience sexual attraction, but it's very rare and only after I develop an emotional connection. I'm demisexual which is under the asexual umbrella.
Doesn't require one to be gay - what about bi or pan, or even otherwise straight in all settings but this one? Plenty of ways that threes can be mutual triangles.
@@peppermintmum3177 Dragon hordes. (lot of Aces tend to have collections they're very passionate about) Also dragons are one of the mythological creatures that aren't connected with sexual attraction in some way.
Okay an asexual here to explain. There’s a huge common joke in the community with either cake or garlic bread. It’s essentially “I would rather eat cake/garlic bread than do the nasty” but when there’s no context I can see how that’s confusing. Pretty much every asexual knows this joke and partakes in it because it’s hilarious to us.
As an ace person who is sexually active and who's neutral to the thought of sex I'm thankful that little comic included that aspect of the ace spectrum because it's often overlooked
Even as someone who fits the stereotypical image of an ace person in a lot of ways, I find it annoying when people assume I'm sex-repulsed or are not generally inclusive of the other parts of our community.
I was holding my breath, afraid that the sex favourable among us wouldn't be included. I was also worried about aromantic being overlooked because they did the 'but we can still love romantically' line. Was really glad when both were included.
The cake thing is just a meme that came from someone saying they would rather eat cake than have sexual intercourse. Naturally, because it is a meme, we, aces, use it all the time.
i'm in the "i grew up thinking sexual attraction is a fake thing that people made up for movies" club. i was so confused when i heard some people actually experiences sexual attraction
As an aromantic, I had the same with crushes too. At age 22 I realised that it's not just a cheap trope to generate tension in a work of fiction, and honestly, I still can't quite believe it.
Im asexual aromantic and I thought crushes were you just chose someone. Then my friends tarted talking about their crushes and how they make them feel and I was like "Wait! You don't just chose someone to say is your crush?"
Pretty sure the latter half of my teens was just me being constantly surprised every time a friend or acquaintance told me they’d had sex and actually wanted that. I think I realised around 19 that I was the unusual one xD;
Yes! Same here. And people's desperate talk about how they NEED a partner was also something I thought was made up or exaggerated until I realised I'm Asexual
oh same!! and how people get crushes on celebrities?? it took me a while to realize that some people actually are sexually attracted to celebrities...i thought people had crushes on celebs because they were pretty and aesthetically pleasing to the eyes
Dragons are also popular icons in the Ace community. Basically, we'd rather talk about dragons than have sex. 🖤🤍💜 What we have as our horde varies from person to person.
Of all the wonderful realisations that came with figuring out I'm ace, that our flag is so aesthetically pleasing is one of the best. So lucky. Well done whoever designed it.
As we may never have children of our own, we are gifted with the powers of dad jokes from a young age, and with growing up with them, we perfect the art.
@@toxic_thoughts_xx2673 Haha lol! You can definitely prefer those things without being asexual, but you'll have to determine how you want to identify for yourself!
I didn’t know about the dragon one until I read this and I immediately started smiling because of how I’ve always liked dragons and I looked around my room to find I had one dragon on all of my walls and technically the floor (like drawings and pictures). So since I’m asexual can I have my dragon now?
(for clarification, the "Aces" in this instance are asking the "Aros" if they would be considered gods, and the "Aros" in this meme answer with yes) (Also would like to clarify I am ace)
If anything we Aces and Aros are even better then the old gods. Zeus did some pretty kinky and questionable things to fill that sensual urge. He turned into a bull, a swan, an eagle, and a shower of gold (that is to say a literal shower of gold) to procreate with multiple women and one man. So... there is your history lesson kids! Have a good time and eat your veggies.
Good for you!! LGBTQIA+ people have always existed, and I'm super happy to see that people who weren't able to be informed about their identities in the past are finding ways to identify themselves now. With love from an asexual gen-z person :)
Same thing for me, four years ago when I was 30. I've really come to realize and embrace that you're never too old to discover yourself. I'm still learning new things about myself.
I always felt like I can pass comfortably as a dysfunctional heterosexual. Then in my late thirties I realized that "comfortably" doesn't really describe a life long history of depression.
I know exactly how you feel. I'm a hopeless romantic too and I'm literally sooo afraid that I'll never ever find the right person because of that 😅 I'm afraid that my expectations in a relationship are way too high... but I can't help being hopelessly romantic and demi 😅 I feel like I should live in a cliché romantic novel or so 😂 Lots of love to you! ❤
You will find the person that will understand that and love you for it. I was lucky enough to find a guy that has been with me through my journey of getting that I wasn't just not ready for sex, I might never want it. Through my fear of relationships, And then figuring out that I'm demisexual. And through it all they have showered me with flowers and words of love, and most recently a ace flag sticker for my birthday. You can be highly romantic and asexual! Don't let society tell you how a relationship is suppose to be, buy a bunch of books or anime and Binge read or watch throughout the night. Cuddle on the couch and then bid your partner goodnight. Live your beat life!
As an elderly Asexual, finding out I was Asexual in my mid-50s, I can honestly say that your wonderful support of this community is AWESOME! Also, we wear black rings on our right middle fingers to identify us as Asexuals to others. It's sort of a code style thing.
i’ve never seen you on youtube before and this video warmed my heart, i’m asexual myself, so watching someone talk about us in such a lovely manner was sooo nice
Ace rings are a symbol in the Ace community, similar to how the earring is known in the gay one. A black ring on the middle finger of your right hand symbolizes Asexuality, while (lesser known) a white ring on the middle finger of the left hand symbolizes Aromantizism. As an Ace/Aro I wear both! And one of my friends recently asked me about it, and when I said that she said "oh that's cool I have one too but I don't wear mine so often" so that's how I found out how my friend of 4 years was a fellow Ace lol
Yep! I feel like its kinda like a secret sign to identify fellow aces and supporters! Getting my Ace ring soon and I'll be on the lookout for my fellow ace gang :D
hi! i’ve known i was asexual for a few years now, but only found out about being demiromantic a few months ago is there a ring to wear for being demiromantic or should i wear the white ring? or maybe just not wear one? :/
If there is any weebs here, just know that the R-rated hero Midnight wears black rings on her middle fingers in her hero costume. Just the smal details in life that make one smile.
As someone who's just been recently coming to terms with his own asexuality... these memes have really been putting a lot of things into perspective about me growing up and... I'm finally beginning to realize why I could never hold a relationship down... or why some people thought I was gay because I didn't act overly horny around women the way they did.
as someone who just found out they might be aro/ace after calling themselves panromantic for years because they wanted a close platonic connection with others (not influenced by gender) and thought they were aesthetically pleasing........ yeah basically
@@shincodedd220 I'm trying to work out whether I'm aro or pan, I know for a fact I'm ace, but I find it hard to tell whether the attraction I feel for people is romantic or not :)
Everybody talks about the "trans-it" and all that but am I the only one who's ever freaked out over the word aromatic because I thought it was aromanitc?
i tell if someone is someone i should have a crush on if i think they would look nice on one of those Pinterest aesthetic boards its a foolproof system
7:39 THIS WARMS MY HEART AND MADE ME TEAR UP WHICH IS QUITE THE ACCOMPLISHMENT CAUSE I DONT USUALLY CRY AT STUFF LIKE THIS BUT JUST THE ACCEPTANCE ITS SO ADORABLE AND SWEET I CANT- My parents are accepting and all but just- *the note and the cake and the rings it's just like- they're so dang supportive and I love them*
I am in love with how obsessed Jamie is with the asexual flag. But seriously though, I am ace myself and it means so much to me that this video exists.
Lovely reminder for everyone: Asexuality is fluid, just as everything else is!! In short it just means you experience little to no sexual attraction. That "little" is very important, because some ace people can still have limited sexual attraction to people, or may want to have sex when they are in a close romantic relationship with someone. On the other end there's other ace people who feel no sexual attraction what so ever, and some are even sex repulsed entirely. It all depends on the person and how they specifically identify 🖤 (EDIT: Thank you all so much for the love and support on this, I've never had a comment of mine blow up like this, and the feedback in the replies has been extremely lovely and sweet. I'm so glad I could help spread light on the topic and help better educate some people. Again, thank you!! 💕)
Im Demi!! Sexual attraction only once very close to someone! Thank you for mentioning this, people dont seem to fully understand that Demisexual IS in fact different than "how its meant to work" or something like that
@@exist4046 I'm potentially Demi/Grey-ace myself!! I know I'm asexual but I haven't been out as such for very long so I'm still trying to figure it out completely (definitely not as easy as the first two times I've came out lol). Regardless I know how often asexuality gets boiled down to just those who are sex repulsed/don't feel any sexual attraction at all, which is extremely unfair and completely erases a large portion of the community. Those who still feel limited sexual attraction or want sex with close partners are just as valid as Asexuals that don't 💖
I once had a friend who was bi and trans. I figured they knew about the LGBTQ+ community so I listened to them. One time when I was twelve someone else was reading smut. I said I was going to leave and when they asked why I said that I was asexual. This “friend” said I wasn’t because you had to be 18 or older. I was forced to stay and listen to something that traumatised me. I knew I was asexual because everyone else my age was talking about sex and sexual crushes and I was busy getting platonic relationships confused with romantic ones and never having any sexual thoughts. I lied and pretended I had these feelings for 4 years, to this day I invalidate myself and cry. A sexuality is valid. Don’t hurt people the way people hurt me.
The post about normalizing not having any experiance with sex or romantic relationships, that one hit me hard. I can see younger me, jsut feeling ugly, unloveble, feeling broken because I didn't understand (and still do not) the sexual attraction thing, I felt so. Wrong. 2021 has been a journey, where I slowly has started to understand myself, and begun to embrace being an Ace. Also the Lego memes. Yes. 10/10
The cake thing is a giant meme amongst asexuals - it kinda started with "If you're having s3x and you'd rather be eating cake, you're probably ace." A black ring on the middle finger of your right hand is a secret symbol between asexuals which has a deep meaning about solidarity and not getting married but it's mostly just you see someone with a black ring and go "OMG ARE YOU ACE TOO??" hope that helps :)
as an ace, it was so validating to see this-- very many people don't recognise asexuality as an actual orientation, and among those that do, many try to say we don't belong in the LGBTQIA+ community. i really appreciate you including us on your channel :)
WTF, that's twisted. As a very sexual person, I am so sorry for the way ace & aro people are treated in the community. Of course you are welcome, just remember to step around the bigots and if they don't get out of your way, don't be afraid to crush their bigotty toes.
I had someone tell me "some people experience sexual attraction, others don't therefore ASEXUAL IS NOT A SEXUAL ORIENTATION YOU'RE JUST A NORMAL PERSON WANTING TO BE SPECIAL" I was.... So confused....
right? I hate being subly nudged out of lgbt spaces for being "basically straight" and nudged out of cis spaces because "smh loosen up i bet you'd really like it if you did it more"
When I was a kid, no one ever said the word asexual. I thought I was broken for decades. I didn't have a word for who I am until I was in my 40's, thanks to social media.
I once helped this kid in middle school, the other boys were picking on him cause they would ask “do you like girls” and he would say no and they would call him gay and make fun of him and he would get pretty sad. So I talked to him and I was like “yo it’s ok to be gay” and he explained that he’s not gay and just really wasn’t interested in people like that so I asked if he was ace and he didn’t know what it was, to cut it short he’s a very happy ace and I am so proud :) Edit:I don’t usually comment but I’m happy I shared this story, honestly Asexual people just don’t get enough love ❤️
another explanation that i haven't seen: while asexual people don't experience sexual attraction, we can still recognize "beauty" and can find someone pretty. that is actually called "aesthetic attraction". it's a pretty useful term even for allo (the cis of trans) people since finding things or people aesthetically pleasing is a thing you also experience. that distinction b/w "pretty" and "hot". you just have to conclude that ace people only feel the "pretty" feeling, and not the "hot" one.
Referring to allo as like cis to trans made me think of the phrase "assigned hetero at birth" and now I can't stop thinking about how true that actually is.
ok so Jamie the cake gag is an inside joke that goes as follows: you know if your asexaul when you have sex because if your asexaul you'd probably rather have cake
As a young gal quite possibly on the asexual spectrum who is currently way too awkward and socially anxious to even consider going on a date, but who still daydreams about one day having a wife, I really appreciate a lot of the messages in this video! Who knows, maybe one day in my late twenties I'll be comfortable enough to go out, meet someone new, and forge a connection with them. Until then, I'll just work towards my other goal of living comfortably in the woods with a few cats ^^
After literal years of seeing tumblr's rampant acephobia, seeing so much openness and positivity regarding asexuality really makes my heart so much lighter. I'm so glad there's still a robust ace community that hasn't been attacked into recloseting themselves, and I might actually join them. I've missed the kind acceptance, along with the cake and dragon jokes.
@@toniodejimi3905 I don't know if they improved, but this attitude on Tumblr is the reason I ended up leaving about four years ago. It's hard to believe it was still so recently.
I'll just drop the website AVEN:s (Asexual Visibility and Education Network) name here in case someone wasn't already aware of them :3 There's useful info there, and the forums are full of wholesome, ace people just vibing together :D
When my son told me he is asexual , all he said was I'm asexual just so you know , I gave him a big hug . He is not a big talker of feelings , though we do talk openly about anything. He is logical and to the point I love my boy
You sound like a wonderful parent! 💜✨ 🤗 Your son is very lucky to have grown up in an environment so full of love and respect that he felt comfortable enough to open up to you about this
As an aromantic asexual, I am so so so so happy to have found this video and your channel! Thank you so much for sharing these memes, I'm so used to aspecs being shut out of queer spaces and this is such a lovely change to see folks like you being great allies and spreading info and love! Thank you!!🤗
I read these somewhere and they're my new internal anthems: Someone: "So who wears the pants in the relationship" Ace couple: "hopefully both of us" And then: "the only thing I'm f*cking is stupid"
I don't understand why anyone would pick sex over cake. Cake is like pizza. Even if it's bad, it's still good. Sex (based on what I've heard?) can easily be pretty bad...
I’m an ace lesbian and I spend hs thinking “oh I don’t have time for relationships. When I’m in college, I’ll deal with that.” Now that I’m in college and realize I’m ace, I realized that I just don’t experience sexual attraction and can feel fulfilled with other kinds of relationships.
I like to describe my asexually like this: I’m fine reading about cookies I’m fine learning about cookies. I’m fine people telling me how they like their cookies. But I don’t like thinking about cookies. And I don’t like eating cookies Okay so people are complaining that I’m using cookies as an example. I love cookies, I just wanted to use some food we all know as an example.
As another ace, I'm a little different. I don't like hearing about cookies, but I don't mind eating cookies once in a while. The rest is the same as you. I just don't think about cookies or like cookies.
Cue well-meaning grandma (or anyone really) baking you all sorts of different cookie recipes, because _surely_ you just haven't found the right kind of cookie yet, there's a cookie for everyone after all
How i exsplain my greysexuality Im fine reading about cake Im fine talking about cake Im fine learning about cake But i never think about cake And I very rarely eat cake
Well. I’m transgender and I was at the doctors today and everybody immediately referred to me as a boy, so that was great. But I’m not on T yet, I’ve been waiting for news from my doctors about it. I’ve been out for over 3 years and I am very. Very. Bored. 😐
I wish you lots of luck with your transition, king! As another pre-T trans guy, I completely understand your struggle. Just keep being the wonderful man you are! 💙💗🤍💗💙
5:15, I wish I had seen that 10 to 15 years ago. I am ace, but I just did not know. I have been bullied at school by boys, when I was 10/11, so I had no self asteem at all. So I thought I was just to ugly, stupid and annoying to be loved or to have real friends. This lasted from my teenage years all the way until I was 25. That is when I 'gave up' on romance and just started to work on being happy with myself. When I was 29 I got a burnout and I finally went to see a therapist. Best thing that ever happened to me, for real. Now I just know I don't feel romantic attraction and that is okay. No more stupid excuses why I don't think someone is hot. I just don't think that way. And I feel better than ever.
I hate how much people make the words “I love you” something unavailable to friends- like I tell my friends I love them and send them heart emojis but yeah and like Valentines Day is also normalized as a romantic and sexual day when all I want to do is eat chocolate and cuddle with my homies though I want to do that all the time-
Power move: buy yourself a huge box of chocolates for valentines day and share it with your friends Or if youre like me you can also just eat the whole box yourself Both work
Someone: did your boyfriend buy you that box of chocolates? :D Me: what boyfriend? I dont have a boyfriend Someone: girlfriend then? Me: nope guess again Someone: Me: i bought it for myself get on my level
I feel you bro, but I feel like saying “I love you” to a friend is not truly what I really feel. I love series because I can relate, bc they’re funny. I love my clothes because I worked hard to be able to buy them. But to my friends, I don’t just love them. It has become such a trivial thing to say, that it’s superfluous. What I truly mean is that I care about them. And hell, I truly believe that caring about someone is a way stronger feeling than merely loving them (bc you can love someone but not caring about them).
I'm so happy valentine's day is 'Friend's Day' in Finland. Even though I have hardly any friends, family are also acceptable celebration buddies😂 Growing up it was traditional to celebrate it in schools with cards to classmates. There is some internationalising going on, trying to make it a romantic day😬😥😑
Sometimes being ace means carfully teaching yourself how to recognize dirty jokes and why they'd be funny, because you want to laugh too instead of having everything go over your head.
@@bookishwriter9460 your still ace, like for example im absolute shit at figuring out if sonething is a dirty joke. But if its about me ill kniw and ill invert your ribcage.
I am an asexual panromantic person!! I was just talking to my partner about how being asexual but not sex repulsed for me means sex is a lot like cake or pie. You don't usually think about cake or pie everyday, you don't wanna eat it every day and you don't rlly think about buying cake or pie everytime you go to the store but if someone you love a lot offers to bake you a pie you'd be like "oh heck yes I'd love some!!!"
@@pilaracevedo2078 I'm glad it was helpful! That's a really good way to put it! This isn't always the case for asexual people who aren't sex-repulsed though, sometimes the act can be the most important part, (I think this is especially true for asexual &aromantic people who still have sex drives) because you can not experience sexual attraction but still have a sex drive- it's like when you're hungry but nothing sounds good to eat.
Thanks for putting it like that. I've known that I'm bi for about a year now but after I came out to my close friends and we were talking about crushes I was wondering what I was because I've only had two that I've acknowledged in my life while they've all had loads. I came to terms with being demi-bi-romantic but was still unsure about demi-bi-sexual or ace and this helps. Sorry I know this is kinda long but I just wanted to say thanks🥰
@@meganriehl3005 damn “you’re hungry but nothing sounds good to eat” really helped ace-with-a-sex-drive click for me. Like I’ve known about and respected it but not fully understood, as much as someone who doesn’t experience it can at least
The perfume analogy and the trumpet meme 100%. Whenever I've come close to coming out to family, they just comment that it's me being weird or to wait for the right person. Now that I'm married we're additionally being asked about kids, and having others tell me I'm being selfish for not wanting sex or kids... Yeah i kinda want to scream. Please just respect others and stay out of their business !
i remember before i realized i was asexual and i used to see those memes like "no sex for x amount of time can you do it?" and i always used to be like "that's not even hard, you dont HAVE to have sex all the time" the day i discovered that all that horniness was actually real and not a joke/meme and it was actually I who simply didnt possess it was an enlightening and frightening day, to say the least
*Wait, no, THAT'S ACTUALLY REAL?!! No it can't be THAT hard for other people not to have sex..... Can it?.... I mean Having sex too much can count as an addiction!... wha-? .... not being able to withstand from sex sounds like an odd medical condition if anything....* *OOF Whatever, I'm so glad I'm not dependent on it. Goodness imagine what a curse that would be!*
1:28-2:51 This basic deep dive into the definition of being ace genuinely made me feel more affirmed as an ace person, here I thank Jamie and whoever made the meme for being awesome
I found this channel just by chance and when I found this video I got emotional. It's not everyday asexuality is being talked about, anywhere. Thank you for trying to educate yourself about this! I recently came out as ace to my lesbian friend and she said she was waiting for me to understand it, and when I texted her 'Happy Pride' last june, she responded: 'Then I have to say the same to you now', I don't feel quite lonely anymore. And even reading the comments under this video, I feel understood, and I wish I could go back to that girl in high school trying to understand why she wasn't like her classmates being basically h0rny every single day, that she was absolutely normal, and liking space more than boys or girls is absolutely awesome as well.
7:37 Context. Rings are a symbol. A black ring worn on the middle finger of the left hand is a way to signal your aceness to others. Cake (and garlic bread) is more like a standing joke. Cake is better than sex! Dragons come up to. Another joke. Aces 'aren't real' and neither are dragons. Therefore asexuals are dragons. Hope this helps.
.... Athena goddess of virginity.... Not a real quote but I can imagine: “why would I want to do it with someone when I can plan battle strategies and fight in war with my spear”
