Am I wrong for ending a 20 year marriage because my wife Slept with over 10 Different Men?  

If it was no big deal, why did the wife want to keep it a secret?

family needs to stfu. she was going with as many men as possible

Damn, her behavior was already disgusting, but her affair partner dropping her off to the last counseling session tells you exactly the kind of monster she always was

So here’s the thing. She cheated, hid it, disrespected and clowned him by introducing him to the guys, never came clean before the wedding, robbed him of having a choice, lied by omission every day for twenty years, tried to hide it when it started coming out, gaslights him that it’s “normal” and “not a big deal” (why hide it, why lie, why try to shut her friend up? She doesn’t believe it’s not a big deal but he should?), doubles and triples down until the paperwork starts. Here’s the thing OP should do when people say he’s wrong: tell them that the divorce is normal, not a big deal and everybody does it and that they shouldn’t overreact.

She never really loved you she regrets marrying you and having kids she wants to be single

Good for op for getting out of the marriage . I mean, she still refuses to take full accountability, she’s been the whole college’s bike (10 people was on the low end according to the friend right ?)while being in a relationship, and still doesn’t see what she did wrong . And jumped immediately on dating after divorce, I’m pretty sure she cheated all through the marriage, which op did say was a possibility. And the family saying it’s not a big deal pissed me off coz the timeline doesn’t matter, be it 20 min or 20 days or 20 years ago, the thing that matters is the betrayal. And she betrayed him on colossal proportions.

She was either cheating with the coworker or keeping him as a side piece/backup plan.

The wife is a cheating 304. She knew she was in the wrong but was trying to gaslight OP. Not only was she cheating at the time while making it clear she expected him to be loyal but she was lying and rubbing his face in it ever since then. Absolutely disgusting behaviour.

10 bodies when you where dating LD, this is still CHEATING and kick the 304 to the curb, that's just nasty. Once a 304, always a 304

What's the point in continuing couples counseling when you are no longer a couple? Having her boyfriend drop her off was just more disrespect.

Nta divorce her and if your family or friends dont agree with you tell them to f off and maybe get new people in your life

Disgusting!! I'd be DONE the second I found out!! THE END!!

"it is no big deal, everyone does it, it is so normal that I actively stopped you from doing it and hid the fact that I was doing it from you. Also I have been going on dates with male coworkers, but I totally didn't have sex with them, and if there is one thing you can be certain of it is that you can trust me to tell you if I have sex with someone." This story is among the most tiring to listen too. I cannot imagine how much it must have sucked to experience her gaslighting first hand. OP has my condolences.

> at least 10 affairs > 'a few mistakes' They aren't your friends for trying to defend that.

She's wrong, she actively stopped him from seeing others while she was in college . She knew what she was doing the entire time. Wouldn't have hidden it otherwise

I was in several long distance relationships never cheated once. If you want to sleep around break up. Lying about cheating is ultimate in selfishness. She wanted to keep you on the stringer while cheating all she wanted. She is gaslighting you and so is anyone who supports her

I hope somebody told the op to do a DNA test on his kids. He still has time to leave a legacy in a higly likely case that they're not his.

For 20 years he ate the "bull$hit" that she poured on his head. He's overreacting! Needs to be patient for another 20 years and everything will work out!

It doesn't matter how long they've been married . She cheated and allowed him to marry her under false pretenses. Every day of not telling him the truth was another lie by omission. 10 affairs plus twenty years of lies was more than enough reason to leave.

He needs to get the paternity test. It could be necessary later on in life for some possible medical issues.

If my own daughter immediately assumed I chested, I'd have a hard time keeping contact with her because that just shows how little she'd think of me.

She sure doesn’t seem too upset, she’s dating before the divorce is even final

She doesn't now agree. She's just lying

the moment i saw the title, i was like, wtf , why is op the ah?

Your daughter/sister/girlfriend isn't going to college to study

20yrs is nothing compared to a partner just minutes of hoeing around

I am guessing the Op's ex will have a life of difficult relationships. Sounds like she is a loose cannon when it comes to the way she treats people she supposedly loves. No surprise both kids preferred to live with their father. To me, her behavior is disgusting.

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NTA NOPE your ex wife make her choice to cheating wail in relationships wail introducing some of hes FWD ON YOUR face wail you dont know them hahaha and those friends tilling you is normal NC THEM they are say normal to cheating haha what kind morality is cheating

Not ready to date ? Stay away from the X .

Over reacting what kind of people do you have in your family?

I'm on the fence here... I'm in an LDR, so the expectation of loyalty is iffy. At the same time, a few women have flirted with me where i live, and I've turned them down, saying i had someone.

too much talk. typical simp.

Nta. Op was lucky to have discovered the wife was a cr.