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Are All Enneagram Type 9s Lazy?

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Are all Enneagram Type 9s lazy? Because their core weakness is sloth, Nines often get stereotyped as “Lazy.” In this video, I do my best to address this question by talking about where this characterization came from, why it’s harmful, and how to change it.
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NOTE:
I cannot emphasize enough how harmful this stereotype is! Please don’t call any 9s (or ANYONE) lazy! The core weakness of the 9 (sloth) doesn’t mean physically laying on the couch eating Cheetos all day. It means that they are asleep to their desires, anger, abilities, needs, and worth by focusing on keeping the peace with others.
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Are you wondering what makes you unique and awesome? Are you struggling to understand your loved ones? Are you confused about your fears, triggers, and anxieties? It’s time to discover YOU! Explore your personality by diving into the Enneagram, Love Languages, Myers Briggs, and MORE! My name is Abbey Howe and I’m here to help you discover YOU!
As an Enneagram 3, my life goal is to help others live a more vibrant life by understanding what makes up the recipe of you. When you subscribe to this channel, you will get funny and helpful insights about your personality type AND the personality types of the people in your life.
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Опубликовано:

15 авг 2024

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Комментарии : 58

@AbbeyHowe 4 года назад

Support this channel : www.buymeacoffee.com/abbeyhowe 🙏 Enneagram Instagram: instagram.com/enneagramwithabbey/ 📸 Subscribe for more videos every week: ru-vid.com 🎉

@eleonore-8969 4 года назад

We type 9's are overwhelmed and care deeply about so many things (poverty, pollution, animal abuse, the kid next door who has feever, that friend who didn't text back, just name it and we care). Caring that deeply is like a huge energy leak all of the time. So we need to recover and recharge. We recharge internally and therefore have to block out external input. Blocking that out is tiring because we are sensitive to atmospheres, feelings of others, temperature,... The world is too much, too loud and too fast, yet we are expected to keep up so we try. Above all that, our internal world is equally intense and overwhelming. People exhaust me but my internal monologue does too. I hope this comment helped to explain why laziness isn't the right term. I even wish I could now and then be more lazy and care less, but nope, I'm actively caring, thinking ánd feeling till I'm exhausted🙂

@AbbeyHowe 4 года назад

well said!! thanks for explaining from your unique perspective. ♥️

@meganpitt 4 года назад

This is so accurate 😯

@eleonore-8969 4 года назад

@pesto pasta Wow funny I recognised your user name and realised u commented on the same comment as me on a video about INFP on a different channel. Are u also 9 and INFP? The reason I remembered it is because 'pasta pesto' used to be a thing between me and my best friend like 10 years ago, I loved that dish and she used to call me that name as a joke. Uuuum are u my soulmate? lol 😊 Typically me to feel some kind of connection trough internet and come across all those introverted people...while in real life I feel like an alien, misunderstood and alone in my way of being. So weird, u have that too? It's an INFP-thing I guess.

@lilijanamae1540 3 года назад

oh my goodness... i just started looking into enneagram and was leaning toward possibly being a 9. as soon as i read your comment i knew for sure. this is something i have had a problem with as long as i can remember and no one else understands. thank you for putting my thoughts into words. 💕

@eleonore-8969 3 года назад

@@lilijanamae1540 Oh I loved reading your comment, I'm happy it helped you somehow :)

@TaraWagner 4 года назад

My husband is a 9. We always joke that he has two speeds: 100mph and asleep. 😂

@AbbeyHowe 4 года назад

both speeds are lovely ♥️

@sharitucker8263 3 года назад

Saaaame

@johnturman6872 3 года назад

Yup

@littlepixxie 2 года назад

It feels good to know this works for you. I get insecure my partner is so driven and investigative and I’m more passive and complacent. I’m a 5 and he’s a 9.

@aarich119 2 года назад

Love this so true of me as a 9😆😆😆

@lmlitz72 4 года назад

When I get too overwhelmed and stressed, I can appear lazy but that is only because I am trying to recharge my "batteries" and find a place away from the external world where I can maintain my peace.

@AbbeyHowe 4 года назад

exactly. what a great way to describe it! you just need to recharge your batteries and build up your inner peace.

@111HeatherJade 4 года назад

My husband is a 9 and one of most hurtful things anyone could say to him is that he is lazy. He is most definitely not lazy. But I see his internal struggle with this, especially now, during the pandemic. I love my 9 husband! Thanks for this Abbey!

@AbbeyHowe 4 года назад

Thanks for your insightful comment, Heather! And your love and understanding for your husband definitely shows 😊

@marishaten7399 3 года назад

My sis is a 9 and she admits that she is quite lazy, until she is really fired up about a project. Then she can even forget to eat or sleep. As usual your analysis is spot on!

@afh9914 3 года назад

It takes a lot to get me to cry, but this video had me crying. I've always thought that I was just lazy and useless because of what other people have told me, but now I have a whole new view of myself.

@tlegoo 3 года назад

I’m crying as I type this. I am so tired.

@NoOne-wt6om 3 года назад

I still feel lazy.

@sethegreen1 4 года назад

As a 9, I totally agree! Any type can have lazy moments 😉! I think this stereotype comes from the idea that we can fall asleep to ourselves and our own desires (not too dissimilar to how type 2s often do the same). This "laziness" or "sloth" is more referencing a desire to prioritize peace over our own dreams and goals. This is why leaning on our direction of integration toward a 3 is super helpful! There is start up cost, and it won't be easy, but choosing to stay awake to our inner dreams is much more rewarding than distracting or numbing ourselves. Love your vids!

@AbbeyHowe 4 года назад

breathe well said!! 👏🏽 thanks for your insightful comment!

@carolinethompson376 Год назад

I'm glad you addressed the issue of stereotypes here. I'm a type 9 and also an empath, which means that I can get overwhelmed and feel drained after being in stressful, busy and noisy situations. My weakness has been to become numb to my own dreams and desires as a means of keeping the peace. There is also a danger of "falling asleep" to our authentic selves when its so much easier to go along with what everyone else wants to do.

@gracep1370 3 года назад

Idk why this made me tear up. I've had this question in my head, when at the same time I know that I'm driven and hard-working. Thank you for helping me understand myself.

@johnturman6872 3 года назад

Amen Grace! I'm a 46 years old '9' and I recently discovered this thing called... rest. Evidently, there is awake-time, there is sleeping-time and then there's.. rest. It's really real! Even God RESTED on the seventh day...

@adayinthelifeofatype9ennea823 4 года назад

Amazing. I always wondered where the stereotypes per type# came from. I look forward to more of these if you’ll be going over each one.

@AbbeyHowe 4 года назад

Glad you enjoyed! I plan on making more 😊

@naomik.1067 4 года назад

I'm an 8, and my partner is a 9. We both have similar work ethics (he takes more convincing some days). I think the biggest difference is our down time. When we aren't at work or doing household tasks, we relax very differently. He is a "sit on the couch and nap" kind of guy, I am a "let's do an activity with our friends" kind of gal. I wouldn't call him lazy, but so frustratingly content doing nothing! Argh.

@Bismarck_Horizon Год назад

Long time ago I usually say to my family that I'm not lazy but I'm just mentally tired easily But they just see me as a lazy person and then the conflict starts again and again So later I just learned that it drains me so much to do that way So I just said "I'm lazy" to stay away from more conflict

@Fidash 4 года назад

I’m a 9. I think it’s more of wanting to maintain status quo. Why do things that will change the surroundings if everyone is happy for now. But if situations change, will be forced to take actions. I dislike waking up early but forced myself up daily before 6am since April so that I can get an hour’s workout because I need the energy to handle the rest of the day. Also, because I have informed my friends what I did (due to having a 2 friend sharing my “success”) , I have to keep up in order not to disappoint them on this journey 😄

@alba7165 3 года назад

I’m a 9. My husband called me lazy for not making his work lunch after six months of sleep deprivation from caring and loving on our first born child. I was heartbroken.

@Redberryfarm888 2 года назад

Oh Alba... I am so sorry that you had to hear that from him. ( You are NOT lazy!!!) My type 7 spouse 'always supercharged... no one does more than he does' ...calls me lazy, too... just because I don't do things exactly as he would... ouch.

@zenachitteboyina8488 3 года назад

I think maybe we have so much mental work going on constantly that it makes physical/emotional things seem so draining.

@strawberryjadey2220 Год назад

as a 9, i am constantly told how lazy i am. hearing it hurts me so deeply but i just tell everyone their right and i am lazy, even if it hurts to say that about myself

@jakimberling1 2 года назад

I’m a 9w8. For me trauma plays a great deal into the 9’s slothful approach to self actualization. The messages I received growing up was literally “ you are nothing” spoken by an alcoholic parent. All my energy had to be redirected to just survive a constantly hostile environment. The saying “The protections of today are the prisons of tomorrow” rings true in many ways. The slothful approach of my self work has always been driven by the false story I tell my self. It keeps me from true peace. The old story was useful in creating a certain type of peace only meant to carry me through those moments. A false peace was the only peace I could manage in those days. It’s was better than none at all. Now the battle for this 9 is undoing the false peace and recognizing it for what it is and what it does. Useful and needed for serving but, totally useless for THRIVING!!!! We where never meant to just survive.

@marybell2002 2 года назад

You're right I know a lot of 9s who create that false peace. It's not a bad short term strategy but I think it destroys their lives if they get too complacent. My dad is a chronically unemployed 9 who lives with his younger brother and I know another 9 who stayed in a bad relationship and he looks really depressed, doesn't seem to bathe or take care of his hygiene anymore. it's hard to watch because they both had so much potential but unhealthy 9s really avoid making changes in their life.

@lilijanamae1540 3 года назад

So, how can we as 9's overcome this challenge of spending all of our energy caring/worrying about other things?

@luifdls6217 3 года назад

focus on yourself..whats important for your growth and happiness

@pointerdogmarketing2197 2 года назад

I have a mental disorder called sluggish cognitive tempo--really slows me down. Its a curse. Enneagram 9 also fits me so I'm very slow and everybody is always angry at me and it's horrible.

@dilemma_unheard-of_dilemma1917 3 года назад

I find myself often, often absorbing the opinions and lives of other people, and then matching my feelings to match their feelings, almost like a chameleon. I find myself exhausted by expending my emotions “feeling” for other people.

@friarpesel5646 3 года назад

As a 9w1 I think... I mean it’s whatever, I’m just gonna...

@kolewilson3347 2 года назад

People still call me lazy tbh haha

@sarajanecase 3 года назад

I love this so much Abbey!!!

@AbbeyHowe 3 года назад

Thanks Sarajane!

@DringBling 4 года назад

Great video abbey! Anyway, I have a question. Do you have any suggested books describing a type 5?

@AbbeyHowe 4 года назад

Thank you! I put all my suggested enneagram books in my amazon list, but I don't have one particular book that's all about the 5. (unless if you're a Christian and want to read Beth McCord's book on the 5. I found the one about the 3 helpful.) However, all the enneagram books cover each type pretty in depth... so I would recommend one of those! www.amazon.com/shop/abbeyhowe

@DringBling 4 года назад

@@AbbeyHowe thank you for your time