Yes this is spot on because im an avoidant. The difference is although i keep myself at a distance because getting too close means a higher potential for disappointment, I dont deliberately reject affection and emotional vulnerability when its offered/given
Many people are looking for guidance from a good speaker and an intelligent, informed influencer like you. It is unfortunate, however, that many would try to choose from these two and not be informed or educated that someone their dealing with is neither.
What if my ex was a mix of both. Really thought my ex was avoidant. In the beginning of the relationship, He would try to reassure, make me feel special, gave GREAT gifts! After two years it felt like he wasn’t even trying to do the work anymore. And as much as I love(d) him, I had to let him go.
I really don’t understand how avoidants have this confidence of looking their ways in relationship as cute😂😂😂😂😂😂. That’s why you people are stuck without love for life
@@Alixir1228There are two types of people in this world: there are those who lose energy by talking to people, and there are those who lose energy when they’re alone. EVERYONE needs to recharge in their own way. We must come to understand that about each other. Though I will say this: as a dismissive avoidant myself, 3 days no contact is the max I can go with no contact. Anything longer than that IS crazy. But that’s what makes it so sad… the ones who need constant love and attention think we’re being assholes when really we just need a break. Then our partner leaves us and we get confused and sad because apparently we just couldn’t satisfy them. From our perspective, people are INSATIABLE. And it’s hard to keep up..
@@soul_ki or how anxious people are basically energy vampires and don't really care about others? Stop demonising a community, all insecure styles cause pain.
yes! this is more commonly known as disorganized attachment which is my attachment style (hopefully not forever, working on it really hard in therapy before dating again)
Totally possible! Our attachment style changes by the day, relationship, and setting! it isnt fixed, its just a framework to understand how we want and expect to see love/care. Dont feel stuck on just one, its all a journey!! Sometimes it can indicate that the person youre trying to be secure with, is actually not secure themselves (unavailable etc). Its a two way street!
Why not speaking out narcissist. It's not good to talk around things or to make them sound prettier as they are. That's the definition of a narcissist coming from a person with 2 narcissistic parents and 10 years experience in detecting them
This is not accurate. NPD is a disorder, not the same as intentionally being abusive. People with NPD can try to work on themselves and be good like anyone. Equating the two is REALLY dangerous because it contributes to the negative stigma on mental health and DISCOURAGES people with npd to get help or support because it demonizes rhem as inherently flawed or broken. Basically, nobody deserves to be treated like an abuser for a diagnosis or neurodivergence. Abuse is its own category. Please do not use language to dehumanize sick or disabled people. Esp not if you want them to have the resources to heal and grow.
The narcissist wouldn't try to sooth you or accept any responsibility, turn it on you, they get off on hurting people. Shit like that from what I understand. I think my ex has a lot of Narcissistic traits.
No way, I’ve been with a narcissist and they are psychos, avoidants are just those who are overwhelmed easily and shut down. They need time to process things, often Neurodivergent individuals can come across as avoidant but it’s a delay in processing. The older I get the more I see a distinction between them. Also narcissists play with your emotions and get off on it.. often they can become violent eventually or mean and go out of their way to get in your space.. that’s not what an avoidant does.
