@@lewishowes Thank you so much. My goal is to be interviewed by you Lewis and Ellen DeGeneres. I am writing my book and we have some childhood similarity like childhood abuse. I am going to send my book to Ellen DeGeneres for a foreword and would love you to do one too. I am open to any help you can offer in getting there. Thank you, Lewis, I totally admire you and your story xx
I appreciate you both for daring to fiercely search different ways to help the masses heal and to know that we are not alone. I am very self aware. However, I have felt so stuck in life by interruptions and my subconscious reaction I suppose. Watching your videos and staying focused on God chips away at the broken hardened parts of me. Thank you 🙏🏽 Truly and I wish you both lots of success in healing many !
I really want to hear the message, but the *VOCAL* *FRY* is like nails on a chalkboard. A real friend has to tell her how un-listenable this makes her message! I'm sure I'm not the only one!
I listened to you for the first time on the show and i have to say, that I'm so grateful to have listened to your story and how you share your deepest, personal life experiences, especially when it comes to boundries and family. Thank you for your lifes work that helps us all heal in a holistic way and thank you for your gracious presence. Namaste 💜
Thank you Dr. Nicole for talking about this topic . Lots of people will feel connected and understood through the words coming out of your mouth. I know I am one of them . Deep gratitude for your honesty and strength. Keep being you. Lots of love and best wishes for your life ahead.
I love you lisa🥰. After listening to all your videos in 2018 I packed up and move and cut the entire family off. When I heard her say it just now all my guilt disappeared.
@@peacejoy8454 Hey April! So happy to see you here! Thank you for the shout out and you did AMAZING in the 12 Week Breakthrough Coaching Program oxoxoxoxo
10.50 ... My Father was brought up in a working class family of 11 through two World Wars. The same atmosphere of poverty, struggle and lack was all-pervasive all the time I was growing up. No wonder I have that kind of sub-conscious/mindset. ....................... Thank you so much Lewis and Nicole.
I know why people don’t have the courage to walk away and create boundaries, because they are afraid of the punishment. I wasn’t afraid, I had the courage to do it, but no one could have prepared me for the consequences. Ultimately it was worth it but boy was it rough
Lewis, I am a retired teacher and I DID TEACH and created a district-wide curriculum for my health classes that included WHOLE PERSON Health - Physical, Emotional, Social, Intellectual and Spiritual Health - We did all sorts of 'lifeskill' stuff - which I've put into a journal that launched on September 1st! People like you were my favorite students! Have hope!
1hr 15 - some loud music come into the video. Absolutely fantastic interview. Nicole is a massive influence in my world and I really loved this interviewer. He has a warm, authentic tone and vulnerability. Just beautiful. Great job guys.
@TheHolisticPsychologist Thank you, Dr Lepara! You have been a gigantic source of healing, understanding, and waking up to ourselves amongst myself and a circle of friends I am in community with, we are reading your books over and over again, dissecting and applying, as we are learning to be conscious and aware through the challenges and struggles of life. Thank you thank you thank you for the bottom of my heart for the work that you were doing! I am finding so much freedom and empowerment that I never knew possible ♥️
To the amazing human being that I meet today in Page &. Blackmore, thank you🙏🏼 for recommending Dr Nicola LaPera to me. It resonated so deeply with me. I hope we meet again. Thank you I feel my search is over finding my healing path x
Lewis ... PLEASE consider interviewing Dr Robert Waggoner, author of "Lucid Dreaming, Gateway to the Inner Self" He teaches how to contact the subconscious directly thru lucid dreaming This is an amazing mind blowing book. Hope you will consider. Delighted to have recently discovered your channel Best to you & Dr Nicole who is outstanding 🙂👍
I loved this interview, she is in point with everything she said, and yes, self consciousness requires work, and boundaries are hard but we must learn to have some in order to have a better life for ourselves.
Thank you for this video. The family thing. Having boundaries just because you have to take care of yourself and which is something they don’t understand when it’s about negativity and mental health connection
I'm a FIRM Believer that when the student is ready the teacher will appear. I've been in a very complicated situation with my family for many years. Most of which I was unconsciously a participant in the dysfunction. However, after years of dealing with guilt, shame, anger, depression and anxiety I finally had a spiritual awakening. I'm learning to create boundaries but when it's with your children and parents that can be extremely difficult. I randomly woke up at 2:00AM and the universe sent me this video. Needless to say I'm beyond grateful to hear someone else's story. Thank you so much for giving me a peace of mind to detach from them unapologetically. It may not be easy but it's necessary for my own well being.
Thank you Lewis!Loved this interview and the rawness of it..and a big thanks to Nicole for sharing not only where she's been at but also where she's at now,showing that there's a continous unfolding, and healing or evolving isn't just about getting somewhere..there wasn't just a mental connection in this interview, it went deeper than that so thanks to both of you for putting that out there!
I could relate to this so very much. I spent my life until my mother died (I was in my 40's) "taking care" of her. She was a hypochondriac her whole life. Everything revolved around her so I lost myself in that and did not create my own boundaries or identity. THEN I enabled and "took care" of my sister and her 2 kids for 6 years in her alcoholism. 6 years of drama which tore up my life. THEN I finally did the right hard thing: I changed ME. I wrote my sister the hardest letter I'd ever written and said I am not enabling you anymore. I admitted I was as sick as her and that I was going to go get well. I did. It is a work in process. WE have to change US. This talk reminded me of that so very much. By the way, that's when my sister got sober (10 years + now). I take no credit for it. But when her resources were gone, SHE got well.
Lori, Thank you for sharing your story here. I "covered" for a younger brother for ages, even while overseas competing on National Team. One day, I had enough. I told him I loved him and always will yet I was not going to cover for him any longer. He got sober and has continued on his journey ever since. As you wrote (I take no credit for it.) Yet when my brother had few choices left and no one to be co-dependent with (as I was), he chose sobriety. Here is to your continued health and happiness. Thanks again. Aloha, Maggie
I said damn 3x while reading your story. Incredible. And you still have the drive to find love for yourself by watching videos like these. Youre amazing
I loved this interview with Nicole! Great information and tools given that is applicable and accessible. What I love about Nicole is that she offers a lot of her insights for free which really can help those who are not financially able to receive this sort of help ❤️ love what she does and love what you do Lewis!
I love the stress bucket concept. : ) The chaotic, stressful thoughts that arise need to be let go of, simply let go of the thought or emotion. Then the natural state of our divine being can fill the space we've cleared. Yes, it's a great daily practice, it works if you do the practice every moment of every day for the rest of your life. The negative in our mind is not infinite, progress is made and the changes are remarkable. Surrender and awareness get rid of all the garbage we have stored in there. This practice is described clearly in the interview on Vimeo with Michael Singer and Tony and Sage Robbins. Let that S%!T GO!! xo Thanks Dr N xo
Annette Robinson absolutely I was suffering from anxiety depression and ED when I left Israel which I was born I got recovery I tried recently to back there and alll came back,,,,,
Thank you Lewis. I've watched your podcast for some time and this one in particular has really struck a cord and even better....has given me tools to reprogram my subconscious. Thank you! Ps - ignore any hater comment because you are living your purpose and providing so much value to so many people by bringing guests like this wonderful woman on. ❤
At the part around family boundaries. This is one of the most challenging places to understand what healthy boundaries are and also how to communicate and hold them, and accept that you are worthy of doing so. At least in my experience- I so relate to that complexity. And, for those that can only imagine it being a terrible outcome, I want to say that it can turn out really well! Once certain behaviors just 'don't work' anymore for the person who used them usually at some point drops those behaviors as they're no longer having the same effect. Plus in some strange way I feel like at least in my reality, the more I learned about boundaries and shifted within myself, the more those people (esp. my parents) shifted in our relationship too. Sometimes it wasn't even needing to express a boundary verbally, but when my energy had shifted and I just wasn't available for it anymore things naturally shifted. It was so scary at first I would feel sick to my stomach, and literally be vibrating and shaking, and with practice and willingness for change, that has shifted! Appreciate how candid and grounded you are in your approach and explanation. I love the way you lay out such important life, emotional, self-awareness in such clear ways. Enjoying watching this- It's very validating to see others who also are so committed to 'doing the inner work' :)
For everyone who gets hammered with manipulative lines like, "family is everything" or "but they're family" you can weigh that against this, if you choose: family is as family does. I try now to choose people who feel and behave like family. And I realize now that ALL good family is chosen family. No matter the blood relation.
I noticed that with people who especially for men or young men they could end up getting stuck into a fight mode instead of flight mode. But once aware of these triggers, you can step away from your fight or flight mode, think about it, and decide how to response. Sometimes it doesn't take it cataclysmic event sometimes it's just awareness for your self preservation because your tired of something and need to make a change. I like what you're both are saying. It's making me reflective on so many things but in a positive way.
Thank you for touching on so many things that are rarely spoken of, in detail, making it both easy to process and a lot to think about. It’s hard to know what to search for online if you’re a #selfhealer so naturally I ended up back under the holistic psychologists wing! This got my mind back on track.
Lewis I appreciate you. I want to give a constructive remark about your interview. I feel that you talk or add verbage in certain moments as she is trying to finish her thought or expand on a thought and I find it distracting as a listener. I can relate to this because you are very in the conversation and really listening to her. But from a listener's stand point I want to really feel and take in what she is saying because I am not there like you are. I find this a bit distracting. This could be your intention. It just feels more like a conversation and less like an interview that would highlight the guest. Wanted to share my feelings. Thank you. 💜
YESSSSSS!! Thank you for saying this!! He is totally talking over the guest!! It makes it as though his comments are more important... maybe not intentional but it seems like mansplaing😬
So astutely stated. Thank you for naming and inviting Lewis to self reflect here on his style and impact. I found myself wondering what he was feeling in his style here in contrast to his interview with Kyle Cease. And Kyle was better at checking him. And to Lewis's credit there were a number of times when I appreciated how he listened when she shared personally.
Glad someone else said it...on several occasions she is just about to say something and he cuts away to something about himself. The worst bit was cutting her off to talk about a previous girlfriends memory loss when she hadn't even said what she was about to say.
I was diagnosed with Autism very very late in life. I have gone through life experience different traumas. Lately I have embraced Buddhism, and I get living in the moment, leaving past behind, not carrying past issues into the now. But, being Autistic it is so hard. I just don't know how to do it.
Great interview! I would like to suggest not interjecting and cutting the guest off while they're speaking though. It's a bit disruptive. Other than that, I love the show and love your energy. Much love!
Great! Thanks! Communication is huge in a relationship I see really it’s everything lol. People really need to become vulnerable open up when they have issues with.you or others in their life, are resenting your family or in a a marriage a relationship etc I watch men say nothing when an issue arises and then resenting his wife or girlfriend later. Telling others or telling his parents instead of coming to his wife being direct open with her. Many men and women do this go to others with the issue instead of their partner.
I like to compare my inner child to the subconscious mind the more you do something consciously them or becomes an unconscious thought as well so I think that is I feel any way that as I'm working on myself and healing myself everyday I help my inner child heal and almost visualize that child smiling and that's how I like to look at it. As opposed to the wounded child still doesn't work on themselves and then they become a wounded child, wounded teenager, wounded adult, where the wounds just keep getting more numerous.
I'm horrified instead of saying this I've attempted to explain my family under the pressure of society's probing. Even to therapists and psychiatrists I've tried to explain that I have parents, but I left them very young and they left me.
Nowadays, almost every teaching including psychotherapy starts to become "more spiritual" especially from the rise of Eckhart Tolle. That's beautiful how these things come together slowly, more people start to observe what is inside and outside of them. They start to awake and heal :)
The memory loss! I’ve always wondered why I couldn’t remember and came from a traumatic home. I share in the same lack mindset...I am currently reprogramming that! Thank you!
Emotional abuse , toxic family and attracting toxic Relationship , not being able to easily leave toxicity due to toxic conditioning being normalised since childhood , guilt shame manipulation and losing ownself people pleasing , keeping own self last as a way of survival , being passive Aggressive , not being able to form boundaries as conditioned made one believe you deserve love only of you are perfect and people pleasing. Its hell to live with thse patterns when one doesn't recognise it. If you have recognised it and is working towards healing them. I am proud of you. May the Divine force be with you. ♥️💜💙
Yep. Consciousness/awareness of our thoughts throughout the day is key to make preferred changes. Mindfulness meditation does help greatly though even if only once a day bc gets you practicing being your observer self outside the distractions of normal life so when chaos hits you better know how to connect to your observer/mindful self. But I know what you mean! You have to practice repeatedly connecting w your observer self throughout the day or never going to reap significant benefits of mindfulness meditation. Family and boundaries- yes. But if also say it’s ok if boundary isn’t set perfectly.. it might even be messy on your side. My need for firmer boundaries with my mom in certain situations has really been rocketed to forefront of my life.. but my mom is actually awesome and super loving and is or has been one of my best friends as an adult.. but she can really hurt me deeply bc of some of her unconscious patterns so it’s wildly difficult for me bc she and I have a really enjoyable relationship! I just drew a firm line in the sand w her during her last visit but I exploded st her but in hindsight I had to for myself to see how significant of an impact her pushing past my boundary was for me and for her to see it. Wasn’t my finest moment but it was so important to have an emotional moment for me to change moving forward. Yes!! Diet is so important. Good interview🌸
I've been going through the same thing for the last 10 years... I have the best parents I could ask for, but my in-laws always make me cry. :/ They have never liked me. Yet I don't want to disappoint my husband by never seeing them again.
Lewis I related to your question SO much- 18:00 I think this is my underlining personal struggle for me and why I haven't taken myself to the next level yet. Curious if you've found some balance around it? Or ways to minimize the guilt?
I personally believe that the more positive aspects you put into your mind the more positive chemicals that become a fund it because of it did those positive chemicals your brain will start to drowned out the negative and incorporate the positive because it will want more of it like the drug affect your brain will want more of all those positive chemicals naturally and drowned out the negative ones The brain is amazing we have to work that muscle like any other muscle in her body
The only memories i have is when i was in school. Home life is so TOXIC. All i remember is i was treated as a slave. I have a Narc mom (overt) and an abusive alcoholic father(D). I am on a healing journey. No drama no toxic fumes from two dirty mouths ( mother and sibling). Evil duo
Such a huge platform and the healing and growth proposition is to influence people to sever relationships with family as the solution? How is this holistic? Instead, how about the concept that you can learn together to communicate, love your family and have boundaries even though it can be hard, uncomfortable, emotional and take time. It's interesting how there is so much emphasis, time and energy to figure out a relationship with yourself or why you are upset about "that missing brownie". How about talking about feelings, issues and personal boundaries with family members? You may be surprised to find communicating your needs/ hurts/frustrations etc. instead of expecting someone to be aware of them helps others know what you are thinking and feeling. I have gone (finally) through this very uncomfortable and healing process this past year and counting with a parent myself and found both of us have grown and matured in the way we now communicate and relate to each other. I have found it to be so much more empowering to my holistic life than if I had just written them off and moved on.
BlissedlLife That’s great that your parent was able to do that but some parents aren’t willing to do the same, they hold entitlement and if they’re not showing you respect or making an effort even when you’ve tried to set boundaries that’s an option.
Be aware of your inner being every moment you can threw out the day . Learn to feel you body inwardly. Small incremental changes will get you there . Our gut is our first controlling brain . Our BRAIN and mind are 2nd. and 3rd.
So many wonderful teachers out there. I do believe you have to do the work and once you get it you say, WOW I survived that and I’m OK. And than you become grateful that you actually had the experience and that you survived what seemed like the end of the world. When you become grateful and are detach from that emotion that had You locked up, how you couldn’t come out of your head that’s when you realize how amazing your life really is. When you can open your heart fully that is the path back to your soul.
One of the best podcasts on your channel. Honest about the secrets of family bullshit that we all have to deal with. Thank you. Your style of questioning and conversing has improved remarkably over the years. Great job and deep gratitude for your work.
This is one of my favourite interviews of Dr LePera. You're a natural listener and interviewer. Thank you both for sharing your vulnerability, experiences and knowledge. xx
This is exactly what I needed to hear after an emotional breakdown linking me to my past! Repetitive cycles can come up but consciousness is key to transcending it. Thank you both for having the impact you do - making a difference, love it!
I loved watching your interview and applaud your unreserved honesty with my fullest respect. Thank you for sharing your findings and strategies. I wish you well in your journey of enhancing peoples life!
I say to those who have a healthy family that's not full of narcissistic, sociopaths cherish it, cause I feel it's common knowledge that family will be the quickest to hurt or screw you over. The reason it is true for today's family is cause everyone's self intitled high horse says you have to deal with it cause of blood, nah anyone on that peddlestool, high horse, self intitled egomaniac crap should be far from anyone's life if you want enjoy the one life you get. It's hard but always remember it's not you or your fault they treat you or anyone that way and don't look back
The big secret is that we have to stop thinking that someone can heal us. It has to happen within. Relying on therapist or medication is the thing that needs to stop. Therapist should be treated as a tool, guide. Work needs to be done by us.
Agreed. I looove this channel and the guests are wonderful. I've learned a lot from them but at this particular interview I also felt there was too much interruption and restatement of easy concepts that were already pretty clear.
A lot of times it seems like hosts are super afraid that their audience will either lose interest (because the interviewee is talking for too long about one topic) or that their audience won't understand certain words or concepts, therefore causing the host to interrupt and steer the conversation elsewhere and/or restate things in a simpler way. Whatever the reasoning, no matter how well-intentioned the host is, interrupting (or an obvious impatience) bugs me to no end.
Amazing amazing podcast! I will say Meditation does help heal the nervous system and help heal the stress in the body from past trauma. Emily Fletcher's book is amazing Stress Less Accomplish more (recommend getting it on audible) She has a great interview with Tom Bilyeu and Aubrey Marcus going deeper into the science behind it all. She also has a great masterclass with Mindvalley. But I truly recommend the right meditation as the foundation to being able to really start healing from the stress we carry, and then of course there are other beautiful tools like Dr. Lepera talks about in this podcast.
Could your scarcity issue go back to past ancestors? My grandma bought way to much food because she was raised during the great depression. I have read that trauma can be passed along thru generations
Loved this talk! Thank you Nicole for having the courage to be so vulnerable and openly honest about your story that is the story of so many others, myself included! Much gratitude ❤️
@@mirelazrepulya9963 I just now listened to six parts of Healing the Shame that Binds you. Short youtube segments. Powerful! And more wise than this interview. Thanks for the post.
Love her insight. Lewis please tell your team to stop adding music while the guest is still speaking, it kind of feels like your rushing them when there not done dropping their jewels. Love Ya💜
I LOVE her content on Instagram and recently found her videos on RU-vid. Thanks for this video and to anyone reading this, have a beautiful day. Much love to you all!
