Dear Rose, thank you so so much for your Podcast. I've been listening to it on spotify for half a year now and you changed, if not even saved my life. This is such a precious resource and I am so grateful to you for kicking my ass and telling me I do have choices and that I can change and be a better person. I hope you have a wonderful week.
Thank you so much for your positive comment, Annelie! I love hearing that my perspective has given you hope and motivated you to change. I appreciate you and I will send you positive energy for your continued healing on this journey.
Why can I listen to all this from you but my spouse who has stuck it out 17 yrs says very similar words & I can't hear it? He's studied & spoke with multiple professionals & I can't hear it from him?? 🥺
I'm struggling with this now. I'm saying the same things to my significant other and the most loving way possible. I've studied mental disorders for many years. I'm not a professional but I've been through my own traumatic events and overcame them and I'm constantly buried in podcasts like this day in and day out listening to new ways to help myself continue to grow as well as other people around me. When I see something that's broken, I don't say oh well it's their problem. When I see something broken I think to myself, how can I fix that and then I begin to educate myself in the best ways possible to fix it. That's how I stumbled upon these BPD videos. Because my significant other definitely struggles with it but I couldn't figure out what it is that she was struggling with. So I kept searching and then finally found the gold mine of BPD. I've been extremely patient with her. And at times I deserved some of her wrath justifiably because I'm not perfect myself. But if you have someone in your life who understands you. They understand when you go through a BPD episode and you're in that negative mind state, that isn't the real you. Because sooner or later you come around and become loving and caring and fun again. And that's what we hang on to. We know that while the BPD person is in there negative mind state, that they are actually wanting to show love. And that's the way they try to show it. It sounds crazy but that's really what it comes down to. Because if the BPD partner did not love us, they wouldn't worry that much about potential worst case scenarios. Unfortunately not everybody is as patient and open-minded to see this. And that's how the stigma circulates when it comes to BPD. I only hope my person sees my efforts someday for what they actually are. And not perceives them as some kind of manipulation tactic as she sometimes claims they are. Because if I wanted an easy relationship. I would have left by now. But the fact is, I want the relationship I am in. And good things are worth working hard for.
I am sorry you had that reaction. It is hard to hear the way the BPD brain causes us to hurt those around us, though without hearing those things, it is hard to change. I hope you are able to gain some insight or hope from it !
