Borderlines VS Sociopaths: Similarities & Differences 

lolz

Are you serious? She spoke about us like we're nothing. Pathetic and so condensing. Did we watch the same video?

@@pinkyere6559 You must have watched a totally different video than everyone else. “pathetic” and “condescending” ??? do you hear yourself? HOW was the way she spoke about people with bpd pathetic and condescending? Explain

VERY TRUE

She mentioned that you are easy to manipulate... it’s bizarre that You are are getting excited for the reassurance of a sociopath who admitted said that plenty of other sociopaths have controlled and manipulated borderlines

Wow this is so true! I only got diagnosed 3 months ago and have been doing DBT but never thought about this. I “split” with my husband a lot. Poor guy has put up with me for 8 years because of the benefits I bring to the relationship like all the love I give.

I’m playing the Mass Effect Legendary Edition as I read your comment. Isn’t it weird how the universe works? But yes, I can relate to this very much.

@@ragnabolt683 I am too 🖤🖤

Yes ahh so my most recent split was after reading a text from my partner which I basically totally misinterpreted as criticism and rejection. I stood out in the pouring rain at family gathering so no one inside could hear me and sent the angriest nastiest voice message where I was trying to defend myself but also actively trying to make him feel like total shit and said that I was done with the relationship. I went from being totally obsessed to this person to feeling like I hated him and was on the phone hearing myself saying all of these awful things that I knew I didn't mean but wasn't able to stop myself. I went inside and was totally disconnected from everyone around me that day because I was totally in my head fixating on that interaction and replaying it over and over in my head and basically just internally raging. Then at the end of the day I checked my phone again and realised that I had basically misread what he said and took it for something else entirely and felt like a gigantic asshole. I'm so quick to just assume the worst that I didn't even read the text properly, I just assumed that he said something that he didn't and applied my own meanings to it. I felt so fucking guilty and apologized over and over and try to explain where it all came from and I try to do better but it really just makes me want to avoid romantic relationships all together because despite my best efforts, it ends up being way too painful for all involved.

THIS. One of my best friends is my Favourite Person, and 90% of the time we're great (she's also Borderline with some narcissism, but no antisocial at all), but that other 10% of the time, if we both happen to be not dealing well with something or are stressed, and one of us inadvertently says something that sets the other off, it's a bit intense. lol. Only via text, never in person. When all is well, I adore her, understand her, am very loyal and protective of her. But when I split on her, I think she hates me, wonder why I bother caring, and feel gleeful when it rains because her apartment ceiling leaks and it causes her great torment. I want the roof to cave in. I just realised how horrible that sounds!!! 😂

I have the same diagnosis and I feel this way as well

Same!!

Yeah. Same. Once I split, all care of empathy flies out of the window for the person if I feel slighted or that they are making a big deal out of nothing. I mainly try to stay empathetic in the beginning because I know I Bull shit a lot. But when I think they aren’t acknowledging the fact that I’m trying, I spilt. I think mainly out of frustration especially if I am close to them and feel like by doing this, they don’t know me at all. Which hurts for someone to think you’re trying to hurt them or manipulate them for gains when that’s not who you are.

@@tranlee8752 true

Sam Vaknin's channel, he mentions BPD might turn psychopatic at times. Being a real expert, gives a lot of precise and academic info on personality disorders. He's harsh tho

I am studying psychiatric nursing, and I find people with borderline difficult to help . I worry that I may be saying the wrong thing . Do you have any advice? :) I have Asperger’s myself so there is some overlap

She doesn’t care... she can’t sympathize your crying. But OK ;)

@@raindropsonroses3919 I can try to help :) what kind of issues do you encounter when working with BPD patients?

@@greenlion6544 haha true but I don't need sympathy. Just wanted Kanika to know how powerful it is to hear good things about BPD when you only hear bad

@@rj3899 well, the more encouragement, the better. The videos are informative!

YESSS ME TOO

Please!

Yesssss

Awesome. I'm here to learn about different mental illnesses. I'm Schizophrenic.

I want to learn more. Bc ppl started to demonaize all with narcissistic or other personality dissoders. And that can be dangeres! Before you have a diagnose are you sure... And in case you are, would you call yourselfe a devil!?

Your joking right, B's are the worst of the worst!

Truly! Kanika has really helped me forgive myself for my BPD and truly be more comfortable with my diagnosis and talking to people and explaining my needs to them! Kanika is such a treasure trove of information.

​@Magnolia Silcox I'm schizoaffective adhd and bipolar. I may or may not be on the spectrum or ASPD because I exhibited dark triad traits at about 5 or 6 (bedwetting past the age of 5, animal cruelty) I was put on Ritalin remeron etc.

Lol. She doesn't care. No body cares about us. She's a sociopath. Why are you so gullible. You give us a bad name. You obviously haven't been hurt enough

She just got you to like her. She's admitted she can charm and manipulate anyone. She's being the picture perfect Sociopath here. You see what's happening?

Thank you for saying this 😢 I'm struggling with finding anything positive in me, therapist is going deeper and deeper trying to explore dark side of me, saying I hate what's alive and I represent death and creepy stuff like that, making me crazy and I really can't stand myself but what you said made me feel better, I am very loyal, I think it's good trait ❤ Thank you and have beautiful day ❤

@karolinanie5946 if it helps at all, my best friend is borderline and she's the only person I know with a heart of gold and morals of steel. Don't let it define you ♥️ I hope within time you can find more positive things about yourself

I'm borderline and I will say there is a sense of childlike behaviors I display, in positive and negative ways lol. I wonder if it has something to do with arrested development? Not sure, but I don't think it's always a bad thing. In fact, those traits are some of my favorite traits about myself c:

Ayy fellow Borderline. I feel the same way, Cluster B is like a misfit family, and if no one else will accept us, at least we accept each other.

Yes but BPD are often victim of others of cluster B. I dont think is good to "belong" such a group cause we are quite opposite than others.

we are so dope

@@Heidi-tn3od We share more similarities than differences. Yes we are often victims of other cluster bs but we can victimize neurotypicals and vice versa. Sharing our experiences together creates better understanding and facilitates insight which is so important becoming a better cluster B.

@@Heidi-tn3od that’s just wrong. but everyone’s experience is different. I don’t want to speak in absolutes that’s not a helpful conversation to have so let’s just end it here.

I have both diagnosis, bpd and aspd. I'd describe myself as a very intense and unstable person.

@@MariaTorres-js3tl thank you for sharing🤍 i hope you get the help you need😌

Yesss.. All ♥ from me!!

@@MariaTorres-js3tl sending you love and kindness❤️❤️

❤️❤️

This made me cry. The love you have for your sister is beautiful and I’m very sorry you both suffered (you because of your grief and seeing your sister going through her addiction and other issues). I have BPD and would be happy if my brother talked about me the way you do about your sister. If she could see this, she’d feel very loved.

@@persapphone thank you so much, that means a lot 💕

I think your sister was lucky as well to have a sibling so devoted to her and her memory 💜

A.J mahari on RU-vid, she has BPD, was in therapy and no longer has it. She did DBT and several other healing modalities. She is now a therapist

Good Stuff!

This!

So what if you have borderline and have anger issues?

Bpd is when C-ptsd is bad enough that it spills over and affects every aspect of your social life and relationships. They essentially are the same thing tho

WE EATIN' WITH THE BIG KIDS NOW

About time!

👏

I'm also a high functioning BPD with many ASPD traits. I've learned as long as I'm not in a relationship I am fine. As soon as I start catching feelings for someone my BPD traits really show and for that reason I have to be alone. It's too painful and I will destroy the other person. It's sad really.

This is me too. I feel empty and bored, but basically stable when not in love or having "Favourite Person" feelings for someone. I feel like my BPD is dormant then. Except I feel dead inside due to the emptiness. I feel like, is my only choice to be either chronically bored, depressed and empty, OR alive and interested, but moody, up and down, unstable, prone to lying for attention, self-harming also (sometimes) for attention, splitting, and just behaving like a crazy person!

@@ladybaabaa3294 very very true. And once we've gone through that cycle enough times; we can see ourselves being crazy but its so difficult to stop. I'd rather be alone. I also have a vindictive streak when my favorite person hurts me and I don't want to be that sadistic person anymore

ive never had a relationship and i probably never will anytime soon because i know i would genuinely fuck that person up bad

@@xlunax3657 I also have a "fantasy vindictive streak", but I've never actually acted on it. If there's even a tiny chance the relationship will continue to exist, I won't want to completely wreck that by exacting revenge. Oh and YES, during my explosions, I'd be screaming, shouting profanities at my FP in the street and not caring who saw, being horribly verbally abusive, physically intimidating, hurting myself, throwing and breaking things, and literally acting like a lunatic, and at the back of my head, I was thinking "WHAT are you DOING!? STOP IT! You KNOW this isn't true and you're just making it worse!"

As a guy this is the norm. Everyone is scared of me

I think I have aspd traits too!(I am diagnosed bpd,ptsd,and mdd, with psychotic features) but I’ve always lacked empathy like I don’t ever feel bad for people unless it effects me

I relate to this and would like updates on how things are now if you see this and don’t mind?

I’m so sorry. That’s a very lonely place to be but I respect your caring about others and your self-awareness about what happens to you in relationships.

@Luna you just described me!

Same It's a daily constant battle with My self. i just want to be alone because i seems to hurt everyone at some point and it makes me hate my self so much.

Holy shit yes! I've always found it so weird how I'm mostly extremely sensitive, empathetic, and wanting to help people - but if split on someone, all feelings are just gone, cold, almost cruel thoughts, but complete apathy too. Like how I'd imagine psychopaths feel.

@@mozarellaist same😹😹😹

I’m the same way. I have BPD.

yeah, but there is a huge difference between reactive and proactive (or instrumental) aggression. people with bpd (like myself) are a lot more likely to be aggressive when there's a trigger they're reacting to, so there's intense emotionality involved in it, whereas people with aspd (especially psychopaths, the most severe subset of aspd) tend to resort to instrumental aggression just as a mean to get something they need or to feel in control over others or powerful, because that hit of dopamine is basically the only thing that makes them feel anything at all. which again, must suck to experience tbh.

Yes yes yes. But when I split, I DELIGHT in it. That malice feels so powerful that I become indestructible. Not that the eternal torment disappears or anything, but it sure does feel better

yep, just dont mind it, i am that type of friend and i dont mean to hurt/hate the ppl i was talking, its just automatic/natural, you have your way and we have yours, the love they have from you wouldnt ended up that fast :)

I love hearing about different experiences! Thank you for being open with me here.

Sounds like quiet borderline. When I got my diagnosis, I read a book about a classic borderline, and I did not recognize myself in it at all. We have the same rage, self loathing, and intense emotions, but we cope by acting in. We tend to isolate, disassociate, and self harm to cope. But we are really good at wearing a false mask of calm & happiness. My friends say I’m zen; but just beneath the surface there’s always something. Always vascillating btwn chaos & toxic perfectionism.

Interesting that being vulnerable around others is essential to recovery. I am ONLY vulnerable around my Favourite Person. Anyone else, I must always be "ok" or I feel embarrassed. But by being vulnerable and showing my true feelings to my FP, they get bombarded a bit at times, and it's actually NOT that helpful for me in terms of any sort of recovery.

@@PinkFaline I'm introverted sort of, but also a major attention seeker, bit of a show off, quite an actress, have a huge ego, and want to be famous. lol.

@@ladybaabaa3294 same. Lol. I developed an alt character who I wld try on when I had to work or perform. She’s a bit of a troublemaker. ;) Think ppl like us need a bit too much structure and validation to survive in that chaotic, competitive world. Did it for awhile; it was fun & I was good at it, but never knowing where I wld be living, traveling, or how much money I wld make only fueled my unstable sense of self.

Goes away? I can think of someone all day

Hey you left a comment a year ago, but I wanted to share something I learned that’s been totally revolutionary for me for you in the chance that you see it or if others scrolling in the comments do. Whenever you feel like your boyfriend is cheating on you or doesn’t want to be with you anymore, ask yourself some questions before popping off and attacking him. 1. Could it be a misunderstanding? Could it be that my boyfriend is having an emergency and that’s why he couldn’t text back? Could my boyfriend’s phone be dead without power and that’s why he couldnt text back? Could he be taking a nap or just needing a little social break due to being overstimulated? Because I know what that’s like. And recognize where this fear of him cheating is coming from. “Why automatically assume that he’s cheating on me? Why do I automatically accept I’m not good enough for him? That I don’t please him?” Because we’re putting our insecurities on him and going off like a self fulfilling prophecy. I think I’m not good enough and therefore he cheats, so I look for reasons or signs that he is and react accordingly. Instead, do what I said earlier and remind yourself the questions. “Could I be misreading this?” And think of other possibilities before jumping off into rage and accusations. I give him a chance to explain himself before “convicting” him. Hope this helps you the way it has helped me. ❤

I know several people who only have empathy for animals and honestly, I have very limited empathy for people but animals - I'll do anything for.

@@margodphd yeah totally understandable

We can talk anywhere we want to

I agree with this comment but as someone with BPD I’ve never known how to feel about Trisha and her BPD. She’s always struck me as histrionic, I also don’t think she’s the best representation at times for us (even though I realise there is no set way to have the illness).

@@sofeyah exactly why it may benefit her to have a chat with someone who is and has put so much work into herself

@@Clevergirl09 that is true!

Please don’t do it. I too have dealt with “friends” with borderline, and it never turns out well. Your friend is probably feeling low and looking for some quick, easy validation. She doesn’t care about *you*, it’s about that validation. Don’t go back. Don’t let these BPDs play with your heart.

Don’t go back to that friend. It’s not worth your own sanity. Keep a distance and don’t reconnect; just focus on yourself and the new people in your life rather than that friend because it’s better to be safe than sorry and she already hurt you and put you through pain by cutting you off, so don’t go back to someone who’s put you through that, regardless of that friend’s bpd diagnosis. Just prioritise your sanity and yourself since she chose to leave your life and it’s better to be safe than sorry. The person who responded above me is right.

I definitely relate to this, I feel better when I'm alone too

The blocking 😔 : It's the worse feeling while it's going down, and even more embarrassing coming back from and explaining. Folks with BPD do have the capability/capacty to work through these things but the ability itself to is pretty stunted from the abuse that led us towards these symptoms in the first place, and it's definitely not a fare arrangement to a well meaning friend. Strong healthy boundries (enforced by the none BPD friend) have helped me keep friendships, and eventually with time, gaining insight became easier and easier and I was able to set my own boundaries too. There is hope but it's a rocky start for sure and can take years of trial and error.

sounds about right lolol

Yeah as an autistic person in my case I am very empathetic but when I was younger I would struggle to understand how other people felt their emotions. I needed to be told directly I feel this way or that way cause I couldn't pick up on nonverbal cues at all. I am much better now but to the point I am hyperaware instead which although better for my relationships not so good for myself.

I have Asperger's and Borderline Personality Disorder. One HUGE difference between my autism and my personality disorder is how they make me view other's behavior. My BPD feels like others around me are the ones who are different from what they "should be" (so to speak). With my Asperger's however, I can very obviously tell that I'm the one behaving a bit off from the norm. That's not necessarily something that can be seen from the outside looking in, but I figured it was worth mentioning. It's a major aspect as to the way I have to learn how to behave in society.

It's a persons choice, not the disorder that defines character. I agree with you.