Can My Wife Quit Her Job To Stay Home? 

Caller: my wife wants to quit her job to stay home with the kids and be a home maker. Dave: how many kids at home? Caller: none. Dave: ......

Being in a job you hate or being bullied at work will make you depressed. Just saying

If she can't handle a regular job she can't handle being a mom. Just being blunt. It's extremely exhausting during the early years- mentally/emotionally/physically. It's not like the Instagram pictures she's looking at.

That boy said his wife has a calling to stay at home 🤣

They were a lot nicer to him than the thoughts in their heads were.

I don't get why they see that it's so bad for his wife to be home and be the keeper of their home. Dave's wife has been a stay at home wife and mother all her life. To be a stay at home wife doesn't make a woman lazy. 🤔

During this time , no one should quit their job unless they got another one lined up on paper contract cement

Sounds like the wife is a whole lotta excuses

She wants to be a housewife. Which is fine as long as you done come with debt. I don’t understand the women who know they want to be housewives, but take out a bunch of student loan debt, credit debt and so on.

She’s too tired from working part time and commuting 30 mins? Give me a break

"She felt called to stay at home" lol

Sounds like she just may be lazy and don’t wanna work and is using every excuse she can to have him work and she stay at home.😳🙄

Cameron, read these comments! We speak unfiltered truth! Dave is being constructive but constrained. If your wife can't handle a 9-5 and basic commute, consider how she will handle the thankless 24/7 grind being a parent can be. Don't enable her a relaxed pre-kids life now. If you do, she really won't be ready and mature enough when kids come around. It'll be 0 to 100 real quick.. too quick...

Sounds like depression but isolating at home won't help.

If she’s depressed now, wait until she has kids... they take most of your time and energy especially in the first few years. She needs to work on getting herself right and helping herself before she has kids... and his words of taking care of her husband and home are kinda rubbing me the wrong way... we all gotta take care of each other as a team.

I wouldn't recommend fostering to any family unless they have a stay at home mother-figure. My perspective from fostering the past year and a half. It's a job in and of itself.

Don’t quit until they fire you!

I enjoy working full time and have maintained 2 jobs at the same time. I’m diagnosed with bipolar 1 disorder and I’ve had to temporarily stop working on occasion, but with meds and therapy things have gotten better for me. I sympathize with this women and don’t want to call her lazy or inconsiderate, but I would hope she gets the medical professionals and proper diagnoses she may need to get in a better space.

In her eyes, he's the depression because of his income. The End

Dave asked so how many kids?? ..... none SMH.

No kids together run while you can!! This goes for both men and woman. There are too many men and women out there to choose from. Don’t settle for someone who is broken.

I think this guy’s call was taken out of context. I think he was nervous and didn’t quite communicate what he was wanting to properly. If a wife wants to serve her husband by keeping the home clean, his laundry always done, meals always on the table and care for her husband in all the ways a wife can and should... and all with a joyous attitude, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that and it is 100% a full time job. I’m quite surprised that Dave Ramsey was not more supportive of this type of role. I agree that if the debt is substantial that she may need to work or at least find a way to bring in some income but the amount of debt wasn’t discussed. There’s nothing wrong with a woman wanting to be a housewife and a true keeper of the home that was once revered not so long ago.

People are saying she's "lazy." I have severe depression, diagnosed. It's not about being "lazy." You have very little energy, even if/when you want or need to do something. For me, being unemployed for 3 years exasperated my depression. Working did give me confidence. That said, that doesn't mean working will help improve depression in everybody.

Cameron......your wife is lazy.

This lady struck gold with this gullible dude

I hope this guy realizes that his wife is being lazy 🙄

Mental illness is real and she might feels trapped.

Maybe she can work from home. Lots of jobs you can do from there. Even daycare or working on the internet.

Lord! Please leave this woman before you get her pregnant!

??...I am a single mom...I am very scare of not having money to take care of my family at the end of the month, my 3 hours daily commute to work is the only therapy I have to keep me going. God is good and I thankful for my strength and my health

Seems like she just wants to be a biblical wife. Take care of the home, husband, family. She feels like the home and her husband is being put on the back burner. If I was her husband I would tell her hey work part time from home preferably. That way she gets what she wants and she can help toward the debt.

My daughter-in-law stays home. She homeschools 2 teenage girls. However, they never see their Dad, because he works 3 jobs. He divorced his first wife for the same reason.

Amazing. Great testimony.

This is from the Holy Bible: Titus 2:4-5 4 That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.

We are also on baby step 2 n we both working and trying to pay off debts. I have started a side hustle a cooking RU-vid channel with 3 young kids. Hoping to be a success one day

Dave responded much nicer than I expected! I'll be non PC for him. She's lazy and you need to run before it's too late Cameron! *Clicks off phone button on desk.*

theyre so nice to that caller. They shouldve just told him straight up.

This helped me in so many ways. About finding a new job and understanding that I take me with it. Awesome message.

About 12 years ago I started listening to your show in order to keep me motivated to save money. Our money saving mindset started because one of us wanted to be able to stay home with kids if we wanted, or needed, to. Listening to your show helped keep me on track! FREEDOM!

If she can’t handle a commute, too exhausting, do not have kids ever!!

Seems like a nice guy. I feel bad

30 minutes isn’t that long of a commute. With her history of depression, she may just need a therapist.

I completely understand your wife's struggle because I feel the same way. Lots of doctors go think patients are depressed, but it's really what they eat, which may be affecting her thyroid gland which controls her energy levels. She may have a hypothyroid or hashimoto's. You should tell her doctor to do a complete thyroid panel on her which will check every vitamin, mineral, and hormone associated with the thyroid gland, not just TSH, T3, and T4. She many be missing an essential mineral or vitamin which cause her to feel exhausted even after a full night's sleep. I understand the pain she is dealing. She should quit her job, stay home, and enjoy herself, and you should gladly accept that because you're her husband. She will be happier, and your relationship may be stronger. She can have the time to sleep in, exercise, shower, try new recipes, look pretty, read, do some charity work, work on herself, clean the house, improve herself, do hobbies, and socialize, and you should support her. Be understanding. Maybe you can open up a business, it could be a store, or online (just like Dave Ramsey here), so you can earn more for the family, and can have kids. I think that is a good plan. A women's place is at home and no about of outside work will ever make her happy! She is happiest when she is with family and starts one. I think her quitting her job will make your relationship closer, and you starting a business will bring your relationship even closer and more successful. Good luck to you.

I can tell by his tone hes not thrilled about her wanting to stay home seems like hes trying to convince himself that hes on board with it.its all baloney.

Titus 2:4-5 “That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.” ‭‭1 Timothy 5:14 - “I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully. 1 Timothy 5:8 - “But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel.”

This poor man is going to end up working three jobs to support the family and, in time, childcare assistance for the stay at home mom. Because if she thinks working in an office is hard, wait till the reality of mom hits her in the face.

i see some hate in the comments but hey if they want a 1950s traditional household lol then go for it ..i dont see anything wrong with it if everyones happy..this lifestyle was very common at a point in time.. i would never be a stay at home wife but i’m not one to judge

In 5 years after they have kids I can hear this guy calling again asking for advice on divorce. Edit: she's probably overweight as she doesnt have any energy to do anything. Bunch of BS. The depression is probably a cause of it, too. I know because I felt the same way before I started tackling my health.

Can vs should

She seems like a princess. I have worked in places where I was expected to work 60 hours a week and lived half an hour away. Another time I have work in place where I was expected to work 8 hours and the commute was 2 and half hour away one way to save money and not go into debt. Another time I lived and worked in a city with terrible public transport and could not buy a car so I used to walk 7 km to work everyday.

A 30 min commute isn’t that bad. My husband and I each have a 20-25 min commute. I agree with Dave and John on this one. The wife’s problems are going to follow her no matter what, so she needs to focus on her issues with a clinician.

She has a calling to stay home to prepare for children she may be able to foster in the future? Really? And I have a calling to retire at 40 with my full retirement benefits & Social Security checks as if I had retired at 70 just so that I can contemplate the wonders of the universe and perhaps... maybe... possibly become a foster mom while my husband works 60 hours a week just to make ends meet.

I can respect her wanting to be a stay at home mom when the time comes or being a housewife until then looking at it from the biblical perspective. I just wish that Dave would have asked about the amount and breakdown of the debt. I'm curious to see how much of it she may have brought into the marriage. Without knowing that or them personally, it may be wise for her to still work for a short time longer in preparation of what she eventually seeks to do from home.

Nice Video! Good Job Dave!

Hey Cameron RUN!!!

I feel called to do alot of things but I need to eat and pay rent. Reality folks!

Not a fun situation!

I don’t know whose dumber the wife or the husband.

There are a lot of people like this in the USA. Your tax dollars are supporting the "I'm sooooooooo tired each day that I can't work".

This woman sounds like she needs to learn how to bootstrap it now because if they had kids she would have no clue how to maintain. Lots of single moms out there busting their butts doing all of it. This woman has help and whining.

I'm a SAHM, if wife is this janky now--DO NOT have kids! (Don't walk, RUN!) She's not built for this life. My family is amazing, my husband makes 3x your salary & I'm happy, healthy, high functioning and some days are STILL rough. Prepare for hurt if you proceed without addressing either mental health or laziness!!! You will eventually resent her & there's no coming back from that.

I feel the calling to be a millionaire, travel the world and do nothing too. That ain’t happening though. She sounds like a lazy bump.

Silly husband, why should she keep working a 9-5 job? That's what she's got YOU for! Or did you not think of that before you legally attached yourself to her?

My gal would be appalled if she heard this. She would refuse to be a stay at home mom, even if she made less than child care.

Maybe the caller's wife needs to find a new job that can help her feel happier. Staying at home doing nothing will only make her more depressed, and also cause more problem in the marriage later. Unless she can do some online business and bring income to the household.

I'm in a similar situation. My wife just bought a Mercedes GLA250 (I drive a Corolla), and now she wants to quit her job. I asked her this morning, "How do you plan to pay for your new car?" She said, "I'll find a way somehow." What am I supposed to do with this kind of logic?

01:26 ... Hopefully she told you that before you two married. She was "called to be a stay at home ..." would be enough to make me walk away. If you got duped and she dropped the "I was called before we got married but never said anything" card then you may have a chance. Either way, sounds like she's convinced you that a good woman's role is laying around the house, "raising the house" (whatever that means), band "monetizing" things. Thankfully my wife has bigger aspirations than that. When she tries to slip in the "I could stay home", I remind her I would expect to not lift a finger for the rest of my days, unless I chose to. That simple. When you stay home ... don't think your work day ends at 5PM. These aren't banker hours. I want breakfast cooked (and I don't even eat breakfast), clothes cleaned, ironed, yard and home maintained. That is IF you want to be a "stay at home wife/husband". Realize your job is to take ease everyone else's burden; it's not easy work. It's likely advantageous to both work, compromise, and work together on "raising the home" (again whatever that means). Parents have been doing it forever. It's 2020, unless you, your husband, or a dependent has TRUE special needs, Ice Cube (Friday) said it best ... "You betta get out there and make that money"

My diagnosis is LAZY

Ok, I honestly thought this guy was going to say he was making $100,000-150,000/yr.

Being a homemaker is a 24/6 job because you do need a spa day. It's a lot of work. If you run your own business,have a newborn,take care of the home/husband. If you dont have a tight schedule you will be tired and all over the place.

This chic is crazy! Thought she had it made in the shade! I used to commute to school an hour there and an hour back. Made it home by 2, had to be to work at 4 til 12:30 am. 5 days a week!

I wonder how much this guy actually tries to help her, it sounds like she’s depressed or just lazy. He seems nice but doesn’t mention much about their relationship or what she’s like.

This wife has zero idea how much emotional, psychological and physical work kids are. She's already exhausted with no kids 🤣💀

Sounds like he wants a woman to cater to his needs. No bueno. She needs to keep working and go see her doctor.

There's no kids, they're barely making enough money. The answer is no.

"On the line we have Cameron the SIMP from Kentucky"

the wife needs to find a job nearby home that has less than 10 minutes away so she can work near home and then see a psych to help support for her depression.

This woman is a problem. What a shame because he sounds like a nice guy.

Keeping it Real!

I wouldnt be able to stay home and depend on a man!!! I just couldnt. That lady has issues!! I am a wife, work full time, go to school, have a baby on the way and I have energy enough to take care of the house. He needs to divorce her

The answer is have her find a job she ENJOYS! Let her take a pay cut but to find an occupation that she's passionate about. If you're still in debt and have no kids she absolutely has no justification to quit her job.

Speaking from personal experience, yes. Inactivity does hurt mental illness, but I will qualify that with, USUALLY. The typical depression case is worsened by inactivity because the patient is isolating and not doing things to create endorphins flowing through the brain. I'm not a psychiatrist, but I have a family member with clinical depression who got worse as they did nothing.

Not sure what's happening with this couple but they should sit and come up with a plan that can benefit them going forward where both of them are happy.

Kids are a full-time job.

No! No! No! Nooooooooo unless you want to pay alimony if you divorce do not let her quit her job. NONNOnONOnOno. Don't be stupid!

Caller isn't getting any intimacy, and she's blaming it on being too tired and having to work. If you let her stay at home under these circumstances, the King Simp award goes to you and you'll never see her in the flesh again.. all respect for you (whatever is left) will vanish.

Dave navigated this really well. The wife has mental health challenges.

Being a stay at home mom/wife is a FULL TIME JOB (when you have kids). Also what if he dies or something happens??

Maybe she was depressed because the job was causing stress they been married 3yrs sounds like they wanted kids and it sounded like they where having problems conceiving and look into fostering kids where she can take care of the kids full time and that is a job in itself but it sounded like she is passionate about kids

She’s just giving up. She might’ve had the drive to do this thing with her husband in the beginning, but it’s been a long journey and she’s losing hope. She either needs the hope to continue or the fear not to quit.

His wife needs to make some sacrifices!

The wife thinks she was called to be a stay at home housewife? She is lazy and she’s trying to use God as her reason for staying home.

What ya have here is a W channel princess in waiting. Mine wanted to quit her part time job to be a homemaker with no children at home. She claimed that house work, and staying pretty and thin was enough work🙄

sounds like she needs a few red bulls 🤣

End this relationship , and DO NOT have kids with this woman . Children will only expand the problems . Getting out with no kids will be easier and make a better choice next time. Thank you for calling.

Depression is real but it shouldn't be the go to excuse for sheer laziness. There is such thing as building resilience and doing things you don't want to do in order to improve your life (in his case clearing debt). If they could afford for her to stay at home or actually had a kid to look after it would make sense.

She got a call to be lazy and not work?? This makes no sense, it's just an excuse so she can be lazy lol

I work full time and keep the house 100% and make 70k. What is up with her? He does a whole lot outside of the house so he is carrying his own weight.

Financially he doesn't have it like that and she is being temperamental. No! This is life, so I said it.

If she’s too tired now to do the things she wishes she could do, she may feel the same way when she’s having to force herself to do it all of the sudden. No clock in time, no paycheck, no one following her to be sure she does it all.