Chatting with an Expert on Narcissism 

I LOVE how blunt she is. Straight talking, no BS. This is what you need to know.

Omg! When she said “we give our best to the least deserving and our worst to the most deserving” I am shook! 😱😭😓🥺

"Shy and awkward is going to be the one who will stay with you when you're 85 years old." - POWERFUL

"Self confident people can be self confident and still have empathy, and not be entitled, and not be superficial, and not constantly be seeking admiration." Thank you for summing up healthy confidence so clearly!

She says, "They aren't fit for patenting and will destroy the children's lives." and "They shouldn't breed." That is so very true!

This woman is a master communicator---good video: she probably her students favorite professor.

This lady needs her own podcast!

I think that narcissists are people that could be found pitiful. At the core of every narcissist is a deeply insecure person, which is why they seek validation.

This guys is using the interview to try and figure out if he has a personality disorder or not lol

My both parents were narcissists and they ruined my life. She is right, narcissists should not have children.

You’re honestly so privileged to speak with such an intelligent woman like Dr. Ramani. I loved this video

I love watching her speak. She is so beautiful, wise and warm. What a female role model.

They get angry very quickly And they are always right and you are wrong.

I've also noticed that narcissists are very envious selfish people, they love to get compliments but they will NEVER give anyone else a compliment nor will they acknowledge anyone else's qualities

he picked her brain but she figured him out extremely quick...Dr.Ramani is a genius

I had her as my professor in abnormal psychology a few years back, and she is definitely one of the most brilliant professors in our university. It seemed like other students took her for granted. Really learned a lot from an undergraduate course.

This woman has such a great way of explaining things

Her analysis on daily vlogging was insanely correct.

“Shy and awkward is who’s going to be with you in your 80s” my favorite quote from this video

I have dealt with several narcissists and they drain the life out of you. In regards to charming and charismatic, I have avoided those people since I was about 15.

"There is no incentive to change." Hit the nail on the head with this.

Why do people keep saying she’s a narcissist. She’s just an expert in her field and has a lot to say about it

My dad is a narcissist. It was a confusing upbringing for me. I feel sad my father's brain is wired the way it is. I hope one day he finds peace.

NEVER stay with anyone that show narcissistic behavior, just run and stay away FOREVER !!!

I'm in love with this doctor she's a complete joy.

Everyone’s mad at the way Andrew is talking to her but I find it cool that he actually has an opinion and questions the stuff she says without blindly eating it up..

"We give the best energy to the worst people in our lives and the no energy to the best people in our lives." - POWERFUL

Two of my ex family members were severe narcissists. It’s a dangerous illness. Narcissists are extremely manipulative people who have mastered their art of deception. They always have to be right and show no mercy to anyone. They care only for themselves and are deeply broken people. It’s hard to see on the outside which is why they are so dangerous to be around. I adopted a narcissist and she manipulated me and lied to me everyday. It took me 8 months to realize what was happening and escape. She gaslighted everything to me and made me feel guilty when it was her who was in the wrong. When we said our last goodbyes I told her I loved her and hoped she got help. She told me she didn’t love me and that everything that had happened was my fault. It definitely tore down my self esteem but it also made me realize that you really don’t know people. For everyone reading this please do yourself a favor and stay away from narcissists. Even if it seems great they will get into your head and destroy you in the end

steve jobs? Abandoned his daughter refused to acknowledge her for many years until nearly the end of his life

Such an incredibly articulate doctor... genuinely shocked that this level of mental clarity is even possible!

Did you know that after this interview she started posting on youtube like crazy all the time and now has one of the best channels on youtube? Like you should be proud that you interviewed her. Like in another timeline, she never does this interview, doesn't get comfortable with youtubers and doesn't start sharing this knowledge with millions of people. Crazy.

Dr Ramani, I’ve been watching you since August this year. I actually feel like you are my therapist. And you are an intelligent therapist

This woman's mind is so damn attractive.

she's so intelligent and well-spoken, i dont know why youtube recommended me this video but im happy i watched it and learned something.

I swear we all have these features in small degrees but its not clinical for most of us.

I am married to a narcissist and this Doctor is right on all levels. It is very important on knowing how to stay ontop of arguments and maintainig a high level of self-esteem when living with one. Show your children love and what's right and wrong. Let them be responsible for their wrongs and in my oppinion raise them to know God which is the strongest version of a true love.

I've had a narrcasistic friend and one of the biggest lessons I had to learn (outside of learning that they're narrcasistic) is that I had to stand up for myself even when it didnt make sense to everyone else. Narcissists can be very charming, charismatic and on top of everything. So from a distance, they're perfect and any push back against them can be odd to other people.

Facebook and Instagram are a heaven for narcissists.

I'm not a narcissist, but I've been married to one for the last 25 years. I've been extremely lonely throughout this time and if I had to do it again, I would run the other way.

Everyone that disliked this video is a narcissist! She is such a brilliant, gorgeous woman. This video needs to be shared everywhere!

Wonderful speaker. She's so sharp. I could listen to her for hours. She's beautiful as well. Intense eyes. And she seems really grounded. Good interview, Andrewenator!

Absolutely loved her book. It helped me process my emotional detachment from my Narcissistic husband of 45 years. It took me 4 years to exit the relationship and yesterday signed the final papers for separation of assets.

2:24 - Just listen...The most perfect bubble sound ever

There are charming and charismatic people that are not narcissists, but they are more rare than the narcs, especially these days.

This would have been so much better if he didn’t say that he considers himself a narcissist, cause then she could have stayed objective and not catered to his feelings

This one was by far my favorite. I was just talking to my friends the other day how social media is turning so many young beautiful ppl into narcissists.

Very impressed with the guy having interest and questioning the fact that he could possibly be narcissistic. Sounds like he is wanting to learn and become a better person. Something everyone should desire. True narcissistic will never change, do not want to change and do not care to admit or have ANY interest in changing. Great video!!!

It's not really whether or not a person is a narcissist , it's really what percent narcissist we are . We all are narcissistic fr 0 to 100 percent. This is true of all personality characteristics.

Her metaphors are so damn good! I could listen to her all day

A lot of these negative comments are unfounded and unbelievably reactive. She is a really level-headed, insightful and self-aware individual, and it all comes through in this interview. You guys are out of your mind.

My god what a wonderful woman. She is very fluent with her words and keeps my attention. I've rarely found this in anyone where I dont feel distracted by someone talking. I love how intelligent she is. Can she teach me everything in life please?

Now I can't hear what's being said. I suddenly see him sizing you up. When you asked how his day was going. And he asked you why you were late. (I know that narcissistic game) I'm watching you both "work" on each other. Choosing words carefully. This is cool.

If you are ever in contact with a narcissist, RUN and remove them from your life NO CONTACT unless you want trouble. This is coming from first hand experience

I love the fact that Andrew is taking this as a therapist session 😂

She kind of went crazy flustered when you asked her why she was late

wow, proud of this female doctor who led and was able to conclude this somewhat challenging interview so ethically, politely and professionally without losing grace, her goal and even therapy in this game of jedies! I am amazed at her wholeheartedness and I applaud her principles. An intelligent, strong and very confident woman but with a noble and deeply thoughtful soul. I also applaud the good behavior of the gentleman because he behaved as such, despite the fact that it is impossible to suppress the characteristics of him that float with the naked eye; but very brave when exposing himself, expressing himself and also concluding the interview very professionally.

She is very knowledgeable and insightful , and anyone that gets offended by what she is saying needs to look at why

she's honest and fascinating.

A true narcissist would never ever admit they are . Truly.

Mad respect for this woman. I watched her channel while I was going through an intimate relationship with a girl who became incredibly abusive towards me. I had no idea about the concept, I thought it was a personality trait, not a disorder. But If you ever saw the treatment I endured by her, you'd be convinced that narcissists are evil at the core. I'm glad she was honest about avoiding relationships with these people because damn, I wouldn't have survived if I stuck around any longer than I did. They're also the best people in the world when you first meet them. Defence mechanism, and how they lure you in, but none of it is genuine. Anything too good to be true, it probably is.

It’s really awesome the effort you’re putting into these interviews, Andrew! It’s very cool to learn about each person’s life/job/beliefs. Keep it up!

The woman is amazing! She handled the strangeness of the interviewer with patience and compassion ... I wouldn't have had that much patience. ..truely incredible lady!! thanks for her service .. I'm sure she's helped many due to her intelligence and insights

What a brilliant and wise woman, she has the freudian virtue of objectivity and she's empathic too

I've unfortunately had many narcissists in my family life and something that wasn't really mentioned is that narcissists lure people in by PRETENDING to be empathetic. When you're vulnerable and don't understand the sharks that they are, they come in like a messiah and get you to fall into a trap of their control. They gradually break down your sense of self until they gain complete control over your life and restrict your ability to get out.

Finally, narcissism explained correctly. Great interviews!

I could listen to her talk all day! This interview was by far, the most interesting.

Plot Twist: She's actually a super intelligent Narcissist who knows so much about them and studied normal behaviour so that she can act normal while manipulating everybody around her 0.0

Thank you for introducing her. What a stunning conversation occurred!!! I'm jealous of her students, she is great! Already found her channel here on RU-vid! You've done a great job! Thank you, Andrew!

This woman is brilliant and bang on. Thank god for her.

Andrew doesn't really seem like a narcissist in this video because he lets her talk a lot and just briefly says something. I have been around real narcissists and they love to hear themselves talk more than anything + they feel the need to contradict you on pretty much anything.

I love it when her eyes get all big... 🥰

Wonderful sense of humour Dr. Ramani has. + extremely intelligent on this subject.

My brother is a total narcissist. He went on a date once and came back early because it was "an insult" to him how she had not put any makeup on for him. Only to give one example. Living with him is a nightmare, he is so full of himself and he twists everything around to make it out like nothing is ever his fault. He is arrogant and selfish, never gives back. He is quite intelligent and knows how to talk for hours (without letting anyone else speak), but he is so oblivious on what people do and do not want to hear. He does not care how he makes people feel, he always plays the victim and he is incredibly judgmental and convinced that he is the best. To quote him "I don't make any mistakes, because I learn from other people's mistakes". He brags a lot, only wants his "friends" around when they can do something for him, but he never does anything for them. But worst of all he gets angry within a millisecond if you say something he doesn't want to hear, often smashing things and yelling his head off. Every criticism on him is a lie and he makes up lots of shit to make himself look better than he is. He is the most awful person I know, I liked my school bullies more than I ever liked him. I really hope he never has a wife and kids, because I know 100% he would absolutely ruin their lives. I used to hate him, but now I mostly just feel sorry for him. There is no way you could ever convince him to get help, because he is "perfectly normal" and just sees that kind of advice as an attack on him. I don't know what to do with him, other than keeping your distance.

this is great! lovely to hear an actual professional talk about narcissists instead of people on youtube who just hate their parents or something

I know for a fact that I am a narcissist, as well as my father is also a narcissist. This explains a lot to me. Now that I recognize the traits a bit better, I hope to go seek treatment for it, with my local specialist.

This is my mother. 😭😭😭 All day every single day. 😔 I'm so tired of the emotional abuse.

Okay i am going to make this comment to respond to a few things that some people do not understand. 1. "She is a narcissist herself" - Short answer no she is not. People are confusing the narcissism that everyone has naturally in order to consider our ESSENTIAL needs first as the narcissism that lacks complete empathy that she is describing, e.g. i dont care if your mother is sick youre working today, type of narcissism. 2. "But she speaks about narcissists having a lack of empathy while insisting that narcissists shouldnt breed and live on an island" - That is not the same as having a complete lack of empathy for everyone besides yourself. She dislikes narcissists, okay big deal... anyone who lives with a narcissistic relativs would too. She made a silly comment and people are judging her as if she must be a saint to speak about narcissism. 3."But she judged him within minutes of meeting him? how is that not narcissistic?" - News flash, we all do... most people do it subconciously but she is a fucking psychologist it is her job to assess peoples psyche so ofcourse she is going to do it. 4."But she uses her friends?" - Not true. She only spoke about her NARCISSISTIC FRIENDS who use others to their advantage. She did not mention her close friends who she would actually care about and the fact that people dont understand that is ridiculous. 5. "How can you not be a narcissist and publish a book speaking from authority?" - well maybe because she is qualified to do exactly that. Do not confuse self-confidence gained from years of study, research, practice and teaching with the sense of entitlement that comes with narcissism. It would be narcissistic if she spoke about something that was not in her field with complete confidence, but she has every right to do so on her field of study. That is why andrew asked her on the show. Bottom line: if you think she herself is a deep narcissist then you are most likely being defensive because she is describing your characteristics. It is scary that you cannot have an intellectual discussion on narcissism on youtuve without being attacked, this only proves that what she said about social media breeding narcissists is completely correct.

I adore you, Ramani mam. I have tried to self heal from 8 year Narcissistic abuse just by watching your videos and your talks... I never thought we can manage expectations and hold onto our dreams and confidence with this kind of abuse inside the home. But you made it look possible ... thanks 🙏 please don’t retire any soon.

She handled being trolled sooooo well lmao

"Charm and Charisma are 2 of the most dangerous traits out there, break up with him immediately" Oooo K.

Wow, she must be very, very busy being in L.A.!🤩

I really like this woman. 🌞

*Ramani Durvasula* is our modern age model of how a human being can transcend this society.

Andrew thinking he is a narcissist had me feeling like I could be too... but gladly I watched until the end, and became aware that we aren't! :D

A narcissist fakes parenting. They put on a show. It isn't genuine care or empathy for their children according to what she's saying.

She is so good at explaining it. I just got out of an extremely abusuve relationship with a Covert Narcissist with Dissociative Identity Disorder. Almost died in the hospital and still recovering from it all. He is just like my father, too. I’m working on ending this subconscious attraction I have to them.

Having robot partners for sex, yeah she's so right, narcissists should remain single, stay strictly on their own lane

I've always disliked the hubris most of these psychologists give off. They think they possess the truth about the people they analyze when, in fact, they are dealing with the most mysterious organ in human beings: the brain. Saying that in her ideal world the people she labels as ""narcissists" should stay single is appalling.

This is very good.. Healthy relationships are important. You don't have this with a narcissist, these people are heartless, no depth, empty people. They live in a delusional world.

You never wanna meet a narcissist. They are the worst person you'll ever meet. And the more you hate them, the more you become like them. You might even go to jail if you planning on fighting back. I'm not exaggerating...

Very interesting interview. Dr Ramani does not get phased

You can see that she is professional. And what she is saying is very helpful if you are studying psychology/psychotherapy. I just really do not enjoy the us vs. them talk and such a lack of empathy for the people that might have narcissistic characteristics. The way those people function is a defense that is born out of trauma. To be emotionally hungry as a child is not the same as being emotionally hungry as an adult. When you grow up, you have many resources and can ask for what you need and get it from other places/people. As a child, being ignored/neglected by parents is extremely anxiety inducing and is considered a developmental trauma. Even though that kind of a person might not be the most pleasant, they deserve empathy and guidance.

I like this woman. She's so intelligent.

I kept getting distracted by the interviewer referring to himself as a narc. Either he knows he is or wants to make sure he isn't....

You can get a "chatting with an expert *on* Narcissism" But never a "chatting with a Narcissist" because they would never come to terms with being one

I love this conversation and I’m glad he did the interview. She’s amazing!

Do Chatting with a Sociopath

I'm with a narcissist of 8 years, shortly before I realized what was really happening to me... we were trying to get pregnant and I couldn't. At the time I was heartbroken, now as i have just convinced my family to take me in so i can get away and rebuild my life (feeling frozen and isolating yourself is a huge symptom of this abuse), I am being moved out tomorrow and now I know just how good it was that I never got pregnant. In fact, surviving these types of people cause us walking out or being discarded with extreme guilt on our parts regardless of finding a girls clothing bag in his car, or his ex swearing he is cheating and him still somehow making you question the reality of it all and feeling for them instead... its nice to feel like you are being given signs that you finally leaving is meant to be like the other day I secretly went to my parents house and we cleaned out my old bedroom to get ready for tomorrow... I didn't have a bed after living this life with him for 8 years, I expected I would have to sleep on the floor for awhile and while we were outside getting ready to clean, our neighbor that we've known since I was a baby was moving a brand new "guest room" mattress out to their shed and my mom asked if they were tossing it... they said "great! We asked all the other neighbors if they wanted it and no one did, we didn't think you guys would need it". If that's not a sign I dont know what is, and while we were cleaning. i laughed the most I've probably laughed in over a year. It's amazing how they suck the life out of you and just being in their presence makes you feel cathartic. I wouldn't wish this on anyone. *edit*- the fact that a bed makes me so happy and feel like it's a sign, just shows how stripped bare we are. I cant wait to finally live again.

One of the most insightful videos in this series. I appreciate her perspective and the dialogue between you two.

39 minutes and was sad when it ended. Fantastic video. So insightful, now to spend all night watching all your videos.