Identifying emotions is only a sliver of self regulation. What tools are they encouraging/allowing time for, supporting, for regulation? Regulation is a reset of the nervous system… which involves getting out of fight/flight. Yoga, deep breathing (with emphasis on slow long exhalation, as this stimulates the activation of the parasympathetic nervous system (rest and digest)), any thing that supports mindfulness. Much, much deeper than identifying emotions on a color wheel. Many times, those who have trauma (abuse or neglect, I like Dr Gabor Mates definition) have an extremely difficult time identifying their emotions. Felt body sensations is a good place to start, as far as encouraging that ability or tune in. It is great to have charts like that…shows a step in the right direction…but the schools I know that have things like that, are abysmal at real life application and ongoing encouragement for self regulation. For example: a kid “acting up” is not usually gently asked what they need to support themselves in the moment. They are often sent to the hall, principle etc., problem solving room. A true tuning in and awareness, takes staff who are able to self regulate well and consistently…and often, this is not the case! I’ve seen principles, teachers, who struggle themselves with self regulation! The most powerful thing, is to get it down and model the behavior.
I have a strange connection with the sensations in my body. If I feel adrenaline, increased heart rate, tingling or blushing and it makes things so much worse for me. It’s like a little kid that scrapes their knee and is fine until they see blood 😂 I almost want to disconnect.
Very good analogy! 👌🏼😂 It’s similar for me a lot of times. I think it’s exposing myself to the “blood” a little at a time and increasing my tolerance for it slowly. After every exposure, dee breathing and reassuring myself that I am okay in this moment. Which would then make it feel safe to expose myself to it again somewhat and doing this over and over until the need to disconnect minimizes noticeably. Easier said than done. :) But we deserve it. For ourselves.
Holy crap, this sounds exactly like me. I've given myself some major anxiety attacks thinking I was dying. Man in so glad I'm finally heading down the right path and figuring out what's been wrong with me all these years
if you don't have a model and you have mixed feelings how does this help? this may help you to identify what is an issue but how does it help you resolve an issue? i.e., you can see the tip of the iceberg/issue but that isn't all of the issue. you can say i don't feel good but how do you know what the cause is to apply something that makes you feel good? i.e., not all soothing is helpful for a specific issue. e.g., i can sooth with something like a dessert, or with kind words but if i don't think i deserve them how does this help me feel like i do deserve them so that the issue is resolved? maybe this is why people keep coming back to previously recognized patterns?
I know what you mean Athena, but I have found that it will come out somehow. Somewhere. Writing about helps the feelings to come out in a controlled way. Or just wait a little bit and then write or else talk into a recorder. The thoughts or feelings must come out! Peace to you❤️🙏🏻
I have had anxiety and intrusive thoughts since my teen years, and for the first time I am learning how to deal with them, and your advise really helps me a lot, and it's comforting to know that I am not alone in this process. Thank you so much!!!!!
This is definitely what I’m going through right now with my 4 year old daughter. I find myself shutting down and zoning out when she has a temper tantrum because that is my way of not flipping out. I need this!!!! Thank you sooo much.
SO helpful, Nicole. Thank you. I am back here right now to see how to navigate a concrete challenge to my capacity to auto-regulate! Amazing - practical - resource. A question (perhaps you've covered this elsewhere..) do you have more suggestions for how to lower the intense sensations that come up when we out of sorts? I try belly breathing and that definitely silences the internal monologue (at least temporarily). The tricky part for me is trying to figure out how to deal with my altered body chemistry once it has gone awry. Again - many thanks!
tori790 I am the complete opposite... I flip out and yell 😪. Definitely needed this. I need to remain more conscious and aware and catch myself before I react. 🙏🙏🙏
I journal a lot, I paint and create. Still, in relationships, I can have a variety of dysregulated feelings or emotions about unresolved trauma. I can become emotionally or psychologically triggered and confused about their origins. Thank you for your straight talk and for providing solutions that make sense.
So THAT'S why I ADORED my grandpa, especially as an infant (i have seen photos of me looking at him with the purest affection i have ever seen, and i was very close to him as a child, he died when i was 11....i think it affected me more than I have even begun to process, my mother's death has eclipsed everything else for so long now...Anyway. I digress...) He was the only calm, sane one, it makes sense now- any shred of stability i knew was because of him, i would be even more messed up, he saved us all in so many ways, he was a good man...
A great video (as always) Nicole! I would add that we can also use nature to regulate our thoughts and emotions. A short walk outside, a deep breath of fresh air, the smell of a flower, the view of a sunset, watching clouds pass by, etc can be so soothing for the nervous system.. we often overlook simplicity when simple is often the most meaningful and transformative. 🧡 Thanks again for making this work available for people all over the world who need to know these tools the most! You are amazing! Sending love from Germany, Nila 😉
Conscious awareness is definitely a game changer for me. Observing myself and seeing myself from a totally different perspective and as how possibly someone else sees me is quite powerful. I have spent the whole of my adult life in a freeze response. I have only realised since reading your books and these great videos that how I used to function, or not function for that matter was called a freeze response. Thank you, I am 71 years old and its taken this long to find help and understanding the reason for my depression, anxiety, panic attacks and physical issues i.e. high blood pressure, allergies, digestive problems, back aches etc etc. were all related to a disregulated nervous system.
That cry it out business started long before the 80's! Try the 40's 50's... In the 80's I learned NOT to do that to my children, because it was done to me in 1961.
Laura Martini Thank you! It’s so hard when you don’t really have anyone to talk to. Watching videos and being talked and feeling understood is the next best thing.
Laura Martini Thank you, that’s very kind! ...I just feel like this quarantine is a huge kick in the face for everyone who has been single involuntarily for a long time. Thinking of all those couples happily bonding together (though that certainly comes with its own set of challenges) while I am even more isolated than before. But I guess it’s a great learning opportunity to become even stronger and more independent 🤷🏻♀️
@@lisasachse778 I understand. I can imagine it is very lonely and that's when anxiety gets so much worse. I think it is completely understandable that you feel isolated and we humans have a very primal need for connection, I don't think you are weak or dependent for wanting companionship. We are wired for it and we thrive when we have it. I have lived a similar experience when unemployed in the country I emigrated to, many months of isolation and I felt like I was going crazy. The anxiety was debilitating. It got much better when I moved in with a friend. I hope this quarantine ends soon. One online therapist which helps me with anxiety is Sheryl Paul, she has an instagram account, wisdomofanxiety, if you would like to check it out. Sending hugs!
Heck, glad you weren't born in the early 40's like me. My mother told me that she felt badly then that all the "experts" said to let the baby cry it out. I have dealt with the effects (anxiety and insecurity) of that all my life.
I grew up with a yelling/screaming parent. Iwas in my thirties before i began to improve significantly. It is very difficult to learn this on your own when you have never had good guidance.
Thank u for underwriting the importance of getting in connection with yourself! Being 48, i am so thankfull for walking this way. Despite the negativity that lead me this way. Never to late to know yourself and be connected with unlimited new possibilities. ❤
Summary --- Ways to Regulate ourself i.e our thoughts + emotions n behaviour. 1)Daily practice consciousness awareness by doing meditation --Living in present moment. 2) Practice deep belly breathing becoz our breathe is an amazing regulator system. 3)Journal the feeling that come up whether it is -ve or +ve feeling So u pick up the journal u write it out n close it n thn u refocus ur attention on ur next moment. U don't keep rehearsing wht u wrote in that journal all day . 4)Notice ur body or sensation's like wht or hw do u feel?🤔That is a great way to ground ourselves. Notice the sensation that are happening for u in ur body .The sooner u get connected with ur body ,the sooner u are going to be able to hlp ur body to regulate. Thank u for this video with subtitle 🙏🙏
I came across your content on women of impact, and was struck when you mentioned the memory trouble an headaches that you had experienced in the past, and especially your comment that you written it off as the Alzheimer's gene in your family. I am 23 and have been experiencing the same and even writing it off as the Alzheimer's gene in my family.. at 23! I'm taking your advice and trying to heal my trauma brain 💜 thank you, I feel validated.
I had a hard time paying attention to this video, because of me! I have a hard time just slowing down and paying attention to the learning of what I need to do, instead of just being able to do. I was busy trying to listen and not reading the prompts on the screen at first, so to get myself to slow my mind and pay attention and be present, I started my deep belly breaths! Then that was one of the steps. 😂 Thank you SO much for everything you do. You really are leading a movement of healing for the world.
Your comments about the dangers of journaling and the potential for ruminating and getting stuck in those feelings really resonates with me. There are some situations in life where we're repeatedly, deliberately traumatized for no fault of our own. For me, it was spending years in court being endlessly lied to and lied about in every way imaginable. I survived by dissociating from my feelings and needs, because it was the only way to say sane and have the fortitude not to back down and get steamrolled. I was strong all the time when I wasn't alone, and when I was alone, I spent all my time ruminating, alone with my rage. And through the rage came some very important and creative insights that were essential to the war I was fighting. Now I feel afraid to acknowledge wants and needs as if they are things completely foreign to me, and I struggle to replace the pattern of ruminating, because I'm afraid of abandoning survival mode.
My mother used to tell me she hated me and that I was as useless as “tits on a bull.” And next came 15 foster homes beginning with a care centre for troubled kids at the age of 1.5. Thanks mom and dad for the cptsd. Now it’s broken and failed relationships, constant anxiety and tears, terror, and conflict with self love. So much anger as well. But it’s up to us to manage and re-parent ourselves as you’ve said. Bring in the IFS, EMDR, self love, distraction, can’t, dbt, acceptance and commitment, and schema therapy. Yay.
I’m sorry. As someone whose been hurt as well, I know the mess that our caregivers and people who were supposed to look after us often leave behind. Your case is in the extremes of that, and that hurt is going to take time to heal. But you *can* heal. *Everything* can be healed. Everything. I would add TRE (trauma releasing exercises), somatic experiencing and EFT (emotional freedom tapping) to your list as well. They can be tremendously healing. As can compassion. Don’t ever underestimate how kindness directed towards your hurt inner child can heal you. It can- and you deserve that love. Best wishes
zain Thank you for your encouragement. I am familiar with EFT tapping. Interesting that a good pal just mentioned it again the other day. I agree the trauma can be healed. I find myself trying to do little things currently am experiencing a lot of mental resistance. It’s difficult to feed myself let alone walk long distances or start new hobbies. But I know that over time and with dedicated practice things will start to become a little easier. Best wishes to you as well! Ps, trauma exercises are also something I’m interested in looking into. I’ve been on a mission to crack the cptsd healing code. Are you familiar with the polyvagal theory? I’m quite hopeful that it’s implementation might be a source of relief as well. Best wishes!
Thank you so much for this. I suffer from anxiety but have gotten better with it or so I thought. I detach a lot still. I never looked at it from the perspective of what we receive in infancy. My mom was a very anxious person. She would jump when the doorbell or phone even when the phone rang. Everything frazzled her so it's definitely true that I did not receive any regulatory help from her. Thank you for your words and everything you do.
This video was so helpful! I have a question about the journalling. I have spent my entire life suppressing my emotions. Journalling every morning is helping. However, the feelings do seem to follow me throughout the day after I've journaled - I'm afraid I am still stuffing them down during the day so I can focus on career related tasks that help me take care of other important areas of my life. How can you tell when you have closed the feelings away in the book in a healthy way and not in a suppressing way? I hope that makes sense. I want to be able to structure my healing so I'm not constantly ruminating throughout the day. After suffering auto-immune problems for years, I started actively working on healing emotional wounds and childhood traumas that led to self-sabotage (self-doubt, low self-esteem, toxic relationships). Since I started healing my emotional body, my emotions are popping up constantly throughout the day, and it's forcing me to regulate throughout the day. It feels overwhelming. Is this a good sign though?; could it be that my emotions are learning to trust me again? I need some guidance on how to find balance between self regulating and structured healing without suppressing so I can focus my attention on career related tasks during the day. I appreciate any feedback and suggestions? :) thank you!
If ur reading this one day at a time u got this !💯 it’s not going to be easy and it’s about both the highs and lows of the entire journey. This is a practice and practice takes time .Literally don’t beat urself up Source/ God / universe loves u for u .
I can’t express how helpful your videos are, everything you say is so accurate to people who are suffering trauma, to live in a constant state of fear and threat is no picnic, thank you for this video 🙌
This is essentially what I want to teach my four homeschooled kids. I am grateful for this but I know (more or less) how difficult to be accountable for one’s own emotion. Being a mom is so hard because it’s all about what you’re talking about/+plus the added littles. Gonna get a rule of life here so we don’t have feelings that go wacko speradically. Thanks Nicole for getting this out on RU-vid. This is a saver.
What I would like to ask is (regarding step 3): You say leave the thoughts or feelings behind after you journaled. But I experience that the thoughts are coming back. I recognice them and try to notice them with a neutral approach but I cannot just push them away or "not think" them ... Is there something that I missed about that step or how do I practice to let go of thoughts more easily ? Also; I find it very helpful to not beat myself up for what I think and feel! Thats actually the next big step I´m taking now (learning) after month of watching my thoughts and hating myself for what I was thinking about and feeling! I would reccomend to really practice compassion while observing your mind and feelings! Thank you as always
Thank you for asking this! This has been a similar issue that I have experienced. So much so that I have stopped journaling all together as I found it almost impossible to leave those thoughts behind. I also found, that those same thoughts and fears would come up daily and my journal would be a repeat of the same thoughts. It was very disheartening and I feel lost and hopeless and stuck. Would love to know some techniques that others have found helpful Thank you again. Also, great point about having compassion towards ourselves in regards to our thoughts and feelings. I find this tidbit extremely important.
Isn't the idea not to push the thoughts away but to let them go? The question I sometimes ask myself is "what's the emotional connection to this thought that doesn't truly allow me to let go of the thought?". Then I would write down the connected emotions. All thoughts and emotions are temporary. It is ourselves, that keep the attachment to these thoughts or emotions. Become the conscious observer of the triggers, that creates the thoughts and maybe this will help avoid rumination. Does that help?
I'd like to share my experience in this (but know I'm no expert!). Through my therapy work, i came to learn that feelings i just wanted to "let go of" what i really meant was i wanted to forget aka ignore them. But the reason they kept coming up and not being "let go" was because deep down underneath them there was an associated or triggered feeling that needed to come out. And by come out, i mean like physiologically not intellectually. Basically what i mean is doing things in the brain area like talk about feelings or write about feelings works to a certain extent, but you need to listen to what your body is telling you about them and let it do it's thing. I hope this makes sense.
@@rocioiribe5841 "you need to listen to what your body is telling you about them and let it do it's thing" What exactly do you mean by that? Sometimes I try to sit with my emotions and just cry etc. (also doing that with thoughts while meditating) but they are unbearingly intense and they keep going even though they are meant to go away after a while when you allow them.
Hi Nicole! Thanks again for the amazing tools. Have you ever considered enabling your videos to receive subtitle suggestions here on youtube? I would love to be able to share your content with my friends and family in Brazil.
I needed this today. It showed up in my recommendations and your content is making me so much more aware of my childhood trauma especially that I didn’t have words for or know the causes, thank you so much for being on this platform ❤
Thank you so much. Im doing reperanting, and this things are so useful for me. Im learning to be adult. It is not easy, but I want to integrate myself for the first time. I didnt understand some thing in the start, because the resistance to change is so hiii. And it is all about persistance in this process. Thank you so much for sharing youre knowledge and expirience.
Triggers do go away if you feel the emotions and change the way you react. Then your new way of being is born and that triggered is morphed or gone. Let’s not romanticize out trauma.
Any other healing modalities you recommend I pre ordered your book any other books triggers never go away I want to get unstuck and be able to go on with my day instead of laying in bed and going down the rabbit hole
Everyday your work makes more sense to me and I feel myself growing and understanding myself more and just accepting the process of healing I love you ❣️
:)) i read the title and my mind, right after a nervous breakdown, goes: Nope! nOpE! ability to what my what now?! We don't have that :D I'm working on it :)
Thank you ALWAYS and FOREVER for your time and energy ✨. Most importantly for being you. You're gratification in all your videos is so VERY touching. I am and ALWAYS will be so grateful for you 💓
Thank you ! Tnank you ! Thank you ! It is a convoluted path, but it's worth going there and discovering piece, solace and strength within. Many blessings to you. You emanate confidence, tranquility, beauty and integrity. I love what you do. It is powerful and liberating.
the problem is when something happens and you get triggered it's so hard to be present as I forget all the journaling and meditation in the moment.. must come up something when I'm at work or on the go to push me back to awareness..
it's a journey! don't be so hard on yourself. it takes time and practice and I'm just glad you started that journey. you're going to see that as time goes by it'll get easier to regulate yourself, I'm proud of you!
I definitely need to work on this. I am a big wreck emotionally. I have an opinion that people are born with a temperament that is either uptight or passive. I am definitely uptight, high strung. My mom is as well. At least 2 of her siblings were/are. But I have 4 sisters and two of them I'd consider very calm and regulated. I haven't ever seen one of them cry or get out of control. We were all raised by my mom and dad. Of all 5 kids, my mom said I was the one that ALWAYS cried. She said they could never go anywhere because of me. I also had insomnia no matter how much she sang to me and rocked me. My daughter also was that way. She is super sensitive like me with insomnia, and it's crazy how much a part I see genetics playing. But I hope I can learn from videos like these how to calm myself. I cry in public places, I get super overwhelmed with any little change. I feel like I don't have any friends due to this issue. Also I feel certain my medical issues are connected too. I have dysautonomia and I've had chronic fatigue and now I have constant muscle twitching all over my body. (Very possibly genetic.) Life is harder for some people--even when they have the same situations and opportunities that others have. It's hard to be a Highly Sensitive Person. Good can come from it too, for sure. Especially once we improve all we can.
Same here, I tried journaling, including my dreams for years, reading about psychology/psychiatry, practicing yoga, self awareness... yet I still get triggered. A few weeks ago I exchanged a few words with a girl I liked, then when I asked her name, she came closer with that smile to answer and ask mine, but although I tried to play the game, I had to leave in a hurry after a few seconds! Too much mess inside, what was going on!? She changed my life with her move, but now I still don't now if she wanted to be nice, or was mocking me, most likely just playing.... This inability to handle (and manipulate) emotions is a real handicap for relationships, and so for social life, career, etc!
Dear Dr. LePera, Hello from Hanoi, Vietnam! I can't start telling you how much I admire your work and what you do to guide people through their healing journey. Awareness is key to change the world! THANK YOU. It's my friend's birthday soon and we are HUGE fans of yours. Your content has helped us so much. I want to buy your book for him! Is there any way I could get an autographed copy?! I know this may be difficult but I really want to do something extra special for his birthday.
noticing body really works for me ! today i got angry when dealing with a rude person, and since i noticed how my body felt, i started to adjust my reaction to him
Haven't even started the video and I know she's legit. I practice all 4 on a regular basis. I came here actually searching for why others cannot regulate themselves. Apparently they aren't doing these 4 things. I started out of synch by logging my bad emotions on voice notes in my phone. That led to more conversations with myself. followed by me realizing that there are physical questions my body gives off when my moods change. I used those as indicators to start trying to manage negativity. Leading to a higher awareness of consious. once you are aware you naturally lean away from ego and self service and are basically driven to service of others and the creation. thank you for teaching others
Your work is so important Nicole. I wanted to add that once that physical sensation runs it’s natural course and settles, it’s important to look at what message it was giving you. Emotions are often motivating us to act - Is there something you need Change? Say? What happened before the emotion? 🌸
The only person who was a source of co-regulation was my mother. And she was a dismissive avoidant half the time. She even put my crib in a room down the hallway from day one as she didn’t believe in having her sleep disrupted. She was surprised when I started sleeping through the night at 6 weeks. I probably gave up on her. Things she told me as an adult about when I was young: you were so quiet! I was so relieved when you started school I couldn’t wait to get back to my life. ‘I remember I couldn’t bear to be touched by anyone’ (ie she could not bear to touch her own baby). I would look around the house and you would all be in your own roms doing your own thing! (Maybe because we had to be due to having no attention). You were a slow bloomer. You were stubborn (difficult). You’ve always been difficult. You are like your father (difficult - unlike herself and my brother). You were naughty. There is never any acknowledgment of her own shortcomings as a parent (she was perfect of course).
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Thank you for this video! I think a big discovery in my journey, as simple and silly as it may sound, was that my mind and my body are connected. My body isn't just a physical machine. It is my connection between my mind and the world and relies nurturing and love just as much as my mind does. As I have been doing this, I have noticed increased conscious awareness. I am excited to work on these steps and grow from here!
I don't think that's silly at all. I had a similar realization where i learned that things like breathing or sitting with my emotions and letting them out calmed my mind. It was everything
My girlfriend and I just had a fight. And guess what? I think she's right. Again. She's the one who's always right. I'm always the loser who's always wrong. And it really pains me. I don't even fully understand it. That's why I'm here. She said it isn't always about right and wrong and fault. Well, that's not fair for her to say. For one thing, she does tend to fault or correct me. So as far as I'm concerned, she herself is interested in right and wrong and fault. You can't fault the wrong person and say they think about fault too much. And besides, how is the concept "it isn't always about right and wrong" supposed to make me feel better? I just expressed my pain and insecurity and jealousy about her always being right. You're supposed to make the hurt person feel better. I would've done that for her, if she was always wrong in our history.. Do you understand what I'm feeling?
Never realized how journaling, texting about, talking about was keeping me looped into distressing thoughts. It seemed like a release valve, but maybe it’s a closed feedback loop.
First, I admire you and your mission to help others. You certainly help me! I have started to realize that I engage in a lot of people pleasing as a result of my traumas and this has led to some sort of social media addiction. I compulsively look at instagram among other apps to get some sort of validation. Always wanting to post something funny/witty for a rise. I am getting tired of having everyone else's thoughts and opinions in my head all of the time, I don't know what I truly think about any given topic. I think it's time to step away and start to recenter on my own awareness. This video helped me see that better. Thanks for helping me along my journey. 💚
I had never considered the word "regulate". You describe it in a way thats comprehend able. Of course if one is ignoring, avoiding or hasnt been taught about feelings of course they wouldnt be aware of the opportunity to "regulate" the body & the nervous system. My body has been "trying to communicate" via feelings for a very long time. Its only recently the sensations are so loud with fear having been the forerunner that i said ok...I'll look, explore & learn. It feels kinda good to go into or be aware of the body sensations. To welcome sensations...helps decrease the intensity. TY for sharing your time, your ideas & your experience. One question... How do we know we've experienced a feeling fully, meaning can sometimes a feeling obscur a deeper feeling? 🙏
Thank you for the video. I wonder if someone can help me with some questions I have. So people say be present in your body to understand yourself better but when I am present I feel my clothes, my skin, tingling in my skin, sometimes feel like bugs crawling on me or static, different uncomfortable sensation in my body, and become more aware of different noises from outside. Being present in my body is uncomfortable am I supposed to stay in that uncomfortableness 24/7? I think that is why I am sorta always distant from my body because it is uncomfortable and painful to be present. What do I do? Does anyone else have this problem? Does the uncomfortable becomes less with practice?
My self regulation is -9000 help! Lol I hope when or if I ever have kids they do not suffer because of me. Maybe not having kids is a gift but I’ve wanted them since I was 14. My psychologist always says to never read what I wrote in my journal but sometimes after a few days I completely forget what I wrote so it’s interesting to see what I was feeling a few days ago, she wants me to burn my books that I write. I have already done that but the neighbor probably thinks I’m a criminal because I always burn in my backyard at night so no one can see me.
Omg hearing you mention that it was popular in the 80s to let babies cry it out hit me. My mom told me (to hurt me) that no one could pick me up as a child because my dad said it would spoil me. It hurt me even hearing that but knowing it actually contributed to my problems makes so much sense.
Hmm… I have anxiety from trauma and difficulty self-regulating but held my babies whenever they wanted, co-slept with them, talked to them about their issues, etc. I don’t think anxious parents are the problem; cold uncaring parents are. Mine left me in an attic scream in an attic for hours on and end every night for a year. I can’t remember ever getting a hug or shown love as a kid. That really messed me up.
what happens if you are so sensitive that everything in the external (especially right now with the current events) triggers you :-0 ............. also, thank you for this!
Love you Nicole! Thanks for sharing this. I can definitely benefit from doing more writing about how i feel and feeling where it is in my body. I have the tendency to dissociate and shut down and now it makes sense as to HOW that began back in infancy and childhood. BIG LOVE
I journal but not consistently. I also, pray and read the Word of God, I even do deep breathing...still feel I am on autoregulation in my thoughts and old behavior patterns, esp of codependency and lack of boundaries. I want to consciously choose differently, instead of feel shame afterwards.
How am I 36 yrs old and I was never taught this stuff. And then I wonder why I cannot control or regulate my emotions. They said I was bipolar at 16 and put me on a shit ton of meds for years. I got off of them but then self medicated on drugs n alcohol for 15 yrs. Now I'm trying to learn n fix myself I see that I and my children still suffer
Mine started after tons of abuse at 38. I know i have changes in my amygdala and other brain structures. I have become a different person. Not in a good way. I can't self soothe or relax EVER anymore.
I can self-regulate, but because of my autism and whole life having to deal with abuse, it feels like i'm violating myself. Not being able to have a meltdown when I need to, deeply hurts me longterm.
I like this video becoz of ur representative way by writing subtitle under video so I req u to continue this way of representation. Thank for giving subtitle it is hlping me to under ur spoken word by watching subtitle written words . 🙏🙏
Great vids! Can you place the microphone somewhere else? There are clicking noises in these recordings (maybe from hair touching the mic or the bracelets?).
Thank you again for your videos. Parts of what you talked about I sort of know...but you brought clarity, and an organized way to continue to grow and heal...thank you.
