Ep. 64 The Pitfalls of Performing for Men

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In today's episode, we delve into the topic of performing for men and the detrimental effects it can have on one's mental health. Join us as we explore the pressures placed on women to constantly please men and the toll it takes on their well-being. We'll also discuss ways to break free from this cycle and prioritize self-care. Tune in for a thought-provoking and insightful discussion.
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Опубликовано:

2 май 2023

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Комментарии : 49

@jetunnadine Год назад

Ms. Charlie girl I don’t know why you insist on shifting my wig the way you do but I need you to let up just a little bit. Just keep on scalping me (and the girls!)😭💗

@charliestoolbox Год назад

hahaha it is for your benefit! I see the brilliance in you all and I don't want you all to muddy it with men.

@Gloriacason Год назад

I loved your message! I feel you 100% I just got out of a 6 year relationship and when I tell you I lost myself. I hate looking at my old pictures because I don’t remember her… she was so beautiful and solidified and nothing could stop her. No man, friend or foe ! Now that I am out of it, I am singing in the shower again, working out again, running around having so much fun, laughing, singing and dancing, enjoying life. I hate that I let that person go, but God is here to save me. I will become her again but this time even stronger than ever before♥️ new subbie thank you for speaking the truth 🙏🏾✨ Ps. Everything you said word for word I went through…. I changed myself for him, I was performing for him, I changed my eating habits, the shows I watched, how I talked and interacted with him and others, I was cursing a lot, when I never did before, I gained weight (over 100lbs) & anxiety and depression + suicidal thoughts, I forgot how to hold my head high, I feel like I aged like 30 years, and I had a resting B face. All because I wanted him to like me and even though I changed all of that + teaching him how to better himself, getting him a job where I worked, coaching him on how to make love, how to give genuine love, starting his loc journey, buying him things …. Even after all of that.. you know this man still disrespected me!? He still showed his true colors in the end. Now that I walked away, guess who now wants to be kind and try talking to me again.. lol he can see my instant glow up and he is wondering what’s going on lol it’s because I left …. Now I can work on myself. This is how it looks when a woman is in her element.

@qs715 Год назад

I’m proud of you and glad that your in a much better place i too went through very similar situation for 7yrs I got out and started self love. Stay focus don’t go back.🙏🏾

@charliestoolbox Год назад

We are so proud of you! Trust me I've gone through it too, but on the other side of this is growth and beauty and you are already getting to see that now! keep going!

@Gloriacason Год назад

@@qs715 I am so sorry love, I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy! I know we can push through. We have each other and most importantly, we have God. I am praying for you and your mental health ♥️ thank you so much for the kind words and sisterhood ✨ love this for us!

@Gloriacason Год назад

@@charliestoolbox thank you for reading my story and sharing your thoughts ♥️ I love the encouragement and support! I can see and feel anger inside me but I pray everyday to be able to forgive and move on. I will pray for you and anyone else going through this type of situation. We have to stick together ✨

@Tayyyyyylor Год назад

I would do all that you listed…. If a man paid my bills…. The problem today is that men still expect you to do all the stuff in the house. All the stuff you listed. And work outside of the house. What is the point of having a man if he is not being a provider? If I am doing everything then you are nothing but like another child to me. And I am not signing up for another child to cook for, clean for, spoil, make appts for, ect…. AND I GOT TO PAY HALF THE BILLS TOO? Lol,,. It isn’t worth it. Men need to ask themselves what they are bringing to the table. The only thing they have brought for years to women was financial stability. If they aren’t bringing that, then they aren’t bringing anything.

@charliestoolbox Год назад

The first sentence is not my ministry, but do what works for you. lol

@jessicascreenwritingservices Год назад

I love your channel so much! Wow. I’m noticing the married women I know and some of the married women I follow online look so drained. It all makes sense. They were performing for men and sacrificing themselves and neglecting themselves. 😵‍💫

@charliestoolbox Год назад

exactly! marriage can be beautiful but overwhelmingly it is women balancing everything at all times.

@phylicia151 Год назад

I found your channel about two (2) weeks ago and I resonate soo much with what you are speaking about. Thank you for doing the Lord's work. I am decentering men and centering myself !

@charliestoolbox Год назад

I love this and of course, WELCOME!

@folakeaina6876 Год назад

Every time you make a video , you’ve literally said thing I’ve experienced and your advice is literally saving so much pain for women . So empowering and packs up the bullshit rq!

@charliestoolbox Год назад

That's exactly what I am trying to do. We deserve happiness too!

@mist__annn 11 месяцев назад

Every point you make hits so hard, I'm so glad I came across your channel! The way the videos are both relaxing, motivating and introspective just brings so much comfort &insight to me. Thank you a million times for doing what you're doing, and I genuinely believe that your audience will continue growing out here! Have a good day Queen💜

@charliestoolbox 11 месяцев назад

Thank you! this was so kind and I feel like it too. I just have to restart again after the mini-break I've taken.

@alungakabuasa Год назад

I’m listening to every thing you’re saying. & will act accordingly. Ladies it’s time to work

@charliestoolbox Год назад

get to it, but with love!

@alungakabuasa Год назад

@@charliestoolbox thank you for the reminder 🙏❤️❤️❤️❤️

@lifewithdommy Год назад

I love your messages. they have helped me so much on my self love/healing journey. Thank you

@charliestoolbox Год назад

❤❤❤❤❤

@zayzay4884 Год назад

Thank you so much for this! I needed to hear this today! Blessings! You got a new subbie ❤

@charliestoolbox Год назад

happy to know this!

@moonarium57 Год назад

I’m SO GLAD I found your channel omggg 🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼

@charliestoolbox Год назад

I am so glad too! welcome, welcome welcome!!

@Likelyfairy 3 месяца назад

God bless you ❤ I’m happy I found you

@charliestoolbox 3 месяца назад

welcome!!

@LibertyMadison Год назад

My new favorite channel 😊 subscribed ❤

@charliestoolbox Год назад

thank you! this really does mean a lot.

@LibertyMadison Год назад

@@charliestoolbox of course ☺️ I value content that support women being women and not conforming or aspiring to become unpaid domestic workers based on the promise or exchange of intangible items such as “love”. 😂😁

@adaofcharles1217 Год назад

Great content much love 💕 from Nigeria.

@charliestoolbox Год назад

Sending love back, also shoutout to my Nigerians I love yall so much!

@michelleknox1790 Год назад

I am a new subscriber. I love your message!

@charliestoolbox Год назад

Welcome! and thank you!

@jessiekalff 10 месяцев назад

👏👏👏

@Mara.Isabelle 6 месяцев назад

great video. may I ask if you take video topics by any chance ?

@charliestoolbox 6 месяцев назад

of course! I welcome them!

@Mara.Isabelle 6 месяцев назад

@@charliestoolbox if you could make a video about decentering romantic relationships in general & putting that energy into yourself & making community with like minded women. I know this can be applied to non heterosexual relationships but it would be helpful.

@charliestoolbox 6 месяцев назад

Of course! I will make a video soon and come back to this thread and notify you@@Mara.Isabelle

@triciaworld 9 месяцев назад

❤️❤️❤️

@rb757 Год назад

THE WAY I WOULD PAY SOMEONE TO MAKE THIS EXACT VIDEO WORD FOR WORD TO TRANSLATE IT IN TO SYLHETI BENGALI language 😭 I wish I could have someone say this all to my sweet Bengali mother so she could understand:(

@charliestoolbox Год назад

I wish I could help! I am sure you can subtly start introducing the idea, but I also get how stressful it is.

@rb757 Год назад

@@charliestoolbox I know lovely thank you for all your work hopefully i slowly can ❤️