Finding the Right One to Love Me - The R Spot Episode 24 

I kept picking the wrong ones because I didn't know the love I was looking for lies in me.

I love my free therapy

You attract your reciprocal. So love yourself first, be a better person, be happy and contented of yourself as a single then you will attract the same happy, contented person. A Good catch attracts a good catch and the same goes for a bad one so work on yourself first!

I got to watch this for several days straight to make sure this sinks into my soul, my sub- consciousness, my spirit, my body, my heart, and my mind.

When you grow up in a home where you feel unwanted and in the way, you tend to believe you don't matter. 😢

We all need to learn this in our late teens and early 20's.

I love Iyanla! I have been following her for many years. I appreciate her brutal honesty. Sometimes it hurts, but she tells the truth.

you cannot demand the love from anybody that you don't have.

once again, I am brought back to peaceful in a matter of minutes. it never ceases to amaze me how I can be spinning out of control in my head and overwhelmed with hurt in my heart and within minutes of listening to you, no matter what the topic is, I am brought back to centered. your work and words are such a gift. I can't tell you how many times they've brought me back from the ledge. thank you so much. thank you, thank you, thank you.

The 57 people who thumbs down this video must have had their toes stepped on. This episode is nothing but the truth. I've watched it everyday for five days.

I'd like to take a moment of silence for the people who couldn't receive the words of wisdom falling from the lips of this Amazing Woman!! 🙏 Iyanla Vanzant 👑 I am thankful for your presence on this earth!

Iyanla, u are my daily vitamin! god bless you for everything you do. I love u

i absolutely Love you Iyanla...i am a clinical social worker and Black woman and you inspire me completely

This is excellent.

So grateful I have built myself to a place to be able to hear and receive this message. There are so many who choose to suffer when we have messengers like Ms. Iyanla to guide us along the way. Thank you Ms Iyanla for speaking life into us, for loving us, and for giving of yourself- to us. God Bless You and I Love you!

Separate from God...separate from love.. A lesson for me. Thanks a lot mam

WOW!!! This touched me to my soul!!!!

my dad bless his soul as he soars with angels told me when I was teenager a miserable teenager. That if I waited for something or someone to make me happy I would be forever miserable. He said only I had the ability to make me happy. 12 years since he passed and I hold that memory. Cause he was right! Doesn't mean it's always easy to do xx

I love how straight forward she is

I wanted to be Sandra Dee, and have a moon Doggie. I wanted That girl's apartment and boyfriend, Jack and Jennifer's 90s love on Days of our lives. I was an unloved black girl wanting to be a white girl with parents, home, and love. Things denied me my entire life. I'm tired of looking for acceptance. I'm not white, I'm a beautiful black woman. I am love, I accept me. So I tell myself.😐

And just like that....she's the truth...

We created and attracted the person...because of our unconscious belief about ourselves...I am the problem, I am the solution, I am the one I am looking for! Thank You so much. Your amazing!

“What did they mirror on to me” So deep! Yes, we’re the common denominator in every relationship, so look inside. Thanks Iyanla!

That last sentence was EVERYTHING! ❤️

YOU are the problem & YOU are the solution 👏🏼🙌🏻❤️

This is for people who want to know or better understand themselves, desire to be better RESPONSIBLE and unafraid to do the work to get to that place..I Love you all for that courage!!!! We Rock!!!! Thank you Iyanla (Our ~ Great Mother) ...

Grateful for your love and guidance!

I so needed to hear this on today. I too longed for that love from the outside only to discover time and again that I needed to accept and love myself just as I am. That means all of those things that I thought and felt were not perfect or good enough. I have always struggled with self acceptance especially when it came to my personal appearance. I'm too fat. My hair is too nappy. Why do I have freckles? My breast are too big and my butt not big enough or its flat. My feet are too big and flat..the list goes on and on. So how was love going to find me when I didn't have the capacity to even love myself...just as I am? I am currently on a journey of self love and am discovering so many amazing things about me!! I am divorced and happily single parent of 3 beautiful/handsome grown and semi grown children and one handsome grandson! I've allowed how I viewed myself based off how I thought other's viewed me, and tried to hide or stay under the radar for so much of my life. I feel such peace and happiness at this point in my life. I am single and happy. I'm finally pursuing my advanced degree-something I've wanted to do for a long time but was too afraid to believe that I could. I'm doing things I've only dreamed of doing! Taking my family on vacations and cruises! I never would have thought. By choice, I am single now and am happy and at peace! Just as Sis. Iyanla said, I was attracting exactly what I thought I deserved..I knew I needed to step aside and take a deep hard look within! I am becoming more accepting of me, who I am and the importance that is me! Thank you Lord for guiding me to Sister Iyanla in reaffirming this journey of self discovery and self love! God bless you all!

This helped me right where I am at this moment. You are a true, honest blessing Ms. Vanzant. 🌹

made me cry, but my soul feels at peace with this message, god bless u and us all ❤

Perfect! When the student is ready the teacher ... and the message ... appears. So grateful, grateful, grateful for you my beloved Iyanla! Another step of progress ... this caterpillar is ready to become that butterfly. ❤️

So deep....I'm trying to do the work... the internal work...when she said "you are the one"... literally brought me to tears...who needs a shrink when you have a spiritual mother like Iyanla...

This is a great (thumbs up) short yet powerful message!!! It is essentially the explanation of the proverbs, "As a person thinketh in their heart, so is she/he; and, "Above all else, guard your heart for everything you do flows from it!" It's a verbal illustration of being careful to "watch our beliefs as they become our thoughts; thoughts, words; words, actions; actions, habits; habits, character and ultimately our destiny and identity. I'd love to see an extended version focusing on the How. This episode's lesson(s) gives us the WHO (YOU), WHAT (the problem and answer to why YOU can't find the "right" one), WHEN (now), WHERE (whatever emotional, mental and spiritual place YOU are in now) and a touch of the How (recognize and deal with YOU). I believe the point of departure relies on YOU responding to YOUR narrative of codependency and trusting yourself.

This is so painful to hear, but it is so true for me! In romantic relationships, I have always blamed myself (rather than the man), but just never understood why I continued to end up in unhealthy relationships with men, and friendships with women who betray me. But I have come a long way, still learning and growing.

Iyanla, I love it, because you speak with so much authority. You live this stuff!

How do you always know what to upload RIGHT as the problem occurs in my life Iyanla?

I have been 'no contact' for 3 months in order to gain clarity into who I am and it has revealed so much. It has NOT been a painless journey be any means but not as painful as the life I've been living. This video really struck the deepest part of me and has me looking at everything differently; a complete breakthrough. Thank you so much Iyanla.

damn child that was powerful brutal but loving and powerful

So, I have watched this 3 times! and each time I see something deeper. wow, wow, wow!!!! love you Iyanla - I have followed your work since I was 17. I am 34 now. So thankful for this video! Going to do some journaling - I have a lot to look at within myself! :-)

Yes Sister 🙏 I have learned to be the one. I have redrawn boundaries. Now I trust myself to deal with anything because I am a new woman. Amen ❤️

I’ve only just discovered lyanla I absolutely love this beautiful lady her teaching in this episode was spot on, she has changed me. I AM.

Profound. I think I need to hear this message daily till I get myself in order.

R Spot was hotttttttttttttttttt today,...So much of this resonates with me and how I have attracted people in my life!!!

Preach Iyanla...

Iyanla, you are such a gift to me, the way in which you explain each teaching, in terms that hit me as TRUTH!!! I am so grateful to have been introduced to your teachings. Please keep up the amazing, important work helping us to live more loving, fulfilling lives.

This was perfect for me now. I've been separated now for almost 4 years. it's all me I know now. thank you Miss Ilanya, again. Living with a broken heart is very hard. I need to watch this again and I will.

I have watched this video over 50+ times. No joke. Iyanla u r my spiritual mentor in this life. I'm from Cape Town South Africa and it would be the greatest gift to meet you one day. I kove you and thank you for single-handedly healing so much of my trauma. If God was a person, it would be you (for me).

Love this woman!!! she is brilliant!!!

I needed this. Thank you!

The Spirit within you is beautiful. Thank you for being loving, knowledgeable, kind.

I'm addicted to the truth of your teaching and wisdom. May god bless and keep you in our lives for the support that is greatly needed.

Hearing such truth and wisdom is like breaking through deep water to come up for air. Thank you!

My gosh you are such a wonderful inspiration. I regard you as a Mother to me something I never had. I treasure you

I come here for shelter when the storms of life are too much for me to tolerate. Thank you for uploading this because it encourages a person to acknowledge that they are first and foremost, The One. Many of us ignore who we are and ignore or dismiss what we want and need because we don’t see the value in ourselves but we can see everything in other people. I’ve been doing this in all my relationships (both past and current) it wears me out

Great teaching of realization. Love it.

Thank God for you Miss Iyanla. I am listening to this over and over and over. And sharing it with my children. You are a miracle in my life.

she is just a beautiful human being.

Oh my god, such an eye-opener! Thank you so much!!!

Love the Course of Miracles, I'm reading it.

I just love this Woman!❤

I needed this today and you are a God send! I am enough for me!

Iyanla is simply AMAZING!!

This so true. I battle this everyday accepting myself.

Such a beautiful mind.. thank you.

Thanks a lot for this... I really needed it.

Ouch! Preach girl. I needed to hear this.

still thanking you !!!! I've watched this so many times as a reminder of what you have taught me. Amazing.

Wow, this has just relieved me from a cloud i have been in for the longest time in my life..I m so liberated after listening to this episode.

This is so on point. This video for me helped me to realize what work I must do.

God bless this woman. Its so powerful, I am living this amazing transformation since I really love myself.

man oh man oh man!! thank you Iyanla for this. really needed to hear this right now.

That was very uplifting. Thank you

Had to listen to this twice, may even go back over it....this is very very good

Thank you .... I Love myself....Yes

Very deep. I will have to listen to this several times.

Beautiful. Thought provoking.

Man do i needed to hear this what a amazing women her advice just shakes u up..about dating life everything.

Powerful! Made me teary. Resonated deeply. Thank you.

such a powerful message! right on time!

Thank you Iyanla!!! I am the right one... this touched my soul with a good tear

Your stories are so so so true to be listen to every day.

great teacher!

I’m the right one for my life - This is the right answer what I need and want. Thank you!

Thank you for lifting my spirits today

What wisdom...I thank u...

She just unpacked all my ishhhh!!!!

Yes ..and we all know the truth ..

I love your soul.... thank you from heart

I love this thank you ! I've been working on this for years! I finally see my patterns and see what I needed to work on. I am on my way.

I Love You Iyanla❤️❤️this word brought tears to my eyes..working on loving myself..what an epiphany

I just so appreciate your anointing, thank you God for the vessel and the vulnerability so I can receive this message holistically💗I just love this woman🙌🏾

This was deep! Thank you 🙏

Thank you and bless you for this wonderful message. I do read ACIM at times and need to get back to it!

Thank you so much for sharing your vision. It was a real eye opener.

Thank you, I needed to know this. Right on point. God bless.

I accept and recieve this message..

This was so wonderful to hear. Thank you for creating The R Spot.

You talk me down so many times!! Love you lady!!

I looked at my past relationships.....I got it.

You are the best!! Keep inspiring people. Thank you!