SUPPORT THE CHANNEL (we rely on donations to keep going!) Patreon: / zelphontheshelf PayPal: www.paypal.com... Venmo: Samantha-Shelley-1 #ldsconf #lds #exmormon
I just... I can't get past the "abuse is bad" statement... I mean this is man who went through psychiatric rotation in med school... He KNOWS the harmful affects of abuse. And yet all he could muster up was "its bad". I just can't...
I had an incomprehensibly abusive father I had to deal with throughout my entire childhood. Despite that, I actually had no idea how bad it was until I moved out, since my whole life I was taught that he speaks with god and can receive revelation on my behalf as head of the family. Now I'm packed with a whole slew of various mental disorders as a direct result of that mistreatment (most notably DID and the severe memory loss that can come with it), and it all could have been prevented if it wasn't for those teachings. Even in primary there were daily songs we had to sing about how much we love our parents and how faithful and righteous they are. This church is an absolutely flawless habitat for abusive situations like these to breed and be empowered far beyond where they should be anywhere close to reaching.
Agreed! They're given all the tools for exactly that. And although I hate that you had to go through this in the first place, I'm also so relieved for you that you're OUT. ❤️🩹 Your life and body belongs to *you*, and I wish you a healthy journey.
I was always told growing up that a leader's revelation trumped that of anyone below him, and I was SHOCKED when Mormons started saying that prophets could speak as men because it totally went against that. One of the worst parts of leaving the church is realizing that not everyone who grew up like you did had the same scrupulous mindset that you did or took everything in the church as seriously as you did and most of the people who wanna argue with you about you leaving fall into that group, and then they have the AUDACITY to tell you that you just didn't take Mormonism seriously enough or you don't know enough about the religion.
Laura Miranda. Absolutely! I once had a neighbor who was devout LDS. And with that they paid their tithing and all the other things that the church asks you to contribute financially. I noticed that their kids were always eating hot dogs and chips for dinner and shopping at the DI. It used to make me sick to my stomach!! Family comes first!!. Despite what the LDS Church tells you.
I now have a partial Mormon family but I was raised Baptist. I told a teacher about sexual abuse at home at 16. Thinking they were helping, they took me to my pastor. The only thing that happened was that my pastor spoke to my dad in front of me and asked if he agreed it was bad and wrong and he needed to agree to stop. My dad agreed and we went home...together....and my family hated me. My father never thought it was wrong. Once we all grew up and out of the house, we realized this was rampant on both sides of our family for generations. I agree with yall. They are just saying what they need to keep members. The damage followed me with multiple marriages and not finding help til my 50's but my pastor made sure my dad knew it was wrong!! Thank you for what you do!
Thanks for putting out this video, this is so important to talk about. But this is my first conference after losing my faith in the church, and the thought that my Mormon family is probably so excited and happy about conference makes me feel sick. I don't know how to talk about this with them either. I hope someday I'm at peace with my deconversion like you guys are.
You guys do great work. Thanks for the conference highlights so I can keep up to date on the sh!t show that my adult son is unfortunately raising my grandchildren in!
@@jackcohen8635 I know nothing about Judaism!! I was raised in the LDS religion. Automatically baptized, sent to church with the neighbors, while my parents stayed home. This religion is a cult!!!
@@jackcohen8635 have no earthly idea what you mean? I'm not confused. I did not say I was confused. Who exactly are you referring to? Where are you a church member? I will wait to hear from you..
@@jackcohen8635 here's my second response to you, whom I do not know. I move that I be allowed to confirm, to you, what I am not confused about. 1) you are Jewish. Now, I move to openly discuss and focus on what you mean asking me if I'm "confused."
@@jackcohen8635 thank you for sharing that. I recently joined, with joy. Then some of the ladies. I too thought or still hope many good people (like me) are part of the church. Amen.
My own dad sexualized me heavily while I was a young child going through puberty. He's continued to make constant remarks about my body: how I'm too fat, too thin, my breast are too apparent, my ass is too large, but also I'm somehow "dressing down" and not "showing my curves enough". I was taught by my DAD and the leaders of the church that my value came from my body and my virginity. Even when I was sexually assaulted multiple times, I was told by my dad that it was my fault. That's lead to so many issues in my mental health and perception of myself. And I know it's not just me. This is the culture the church propagates. Men get the power of God and women get to have their babies 🙄
@@ZelphOntheShelf love your channel, btw. I found it today and have been binging like crazy haha Thanks for bringing light to all these issues in the church and the leaders of it
@@bettyoffdead Your father was correct. You say you were exposing your breasts and then in the same sentence want to complain of being “sexually assaulted.” Seems like it was your fault. You were a horrible little child, who just wants to rebel against the Church & cause trouble.
This whole “prophets can make mistakes and can just speak as men” narrative now to excuse everything the church is getting called out on from their history IS NEW and directly contradicts the narrative when I was growing up, which was “the prophet will NEVER lead the church astray, and if he were to try God would remove him”. Anyone know what that quote was from? I heard it ALL the time growing up. The prophet was always right. SO he was right when racism was doctrine. YOU CAN’T HAVE IT BOTH WAYS.
Like 7 years ago I had a friend who was in school to become a Catholic priest and I remember him talking about all the psychological tests they had to go through to make sure they were not going to abuse kids or any parishioners so there's at least one “new” rule. People can still lie their way through but it's at least a step I guess.
In one of the general conferences of 2015 they said you shouldn't be friends with non believers & you should cut them out of your life. I've been made aware they edit their general conferences like they do the book of Mormon but if anyone has the original live stream recorded highly recommend
I remember one of my young women leaders saying, "I'm sure none of you wear immodest pajamas with spaghetti sraps or shorts!" Never did I realize how disgusting that is until now. The only people who will see her are her family members! Dads and brothers! This is incestuous and pedophilic! SO GROSS
I went to high school jn Mesquite Nevada many years ago. This was a k- 12 grade Mormon school. My 39:08 senior year the eight grade reading teacher was arrested for molesting girls in his classes. He was taken to court snd admittedly to it. He was lost his job, his wif divorced him and he lost control from all five of his daughters, was excommunicated from the church and kicked out of town. I wonder how throu the school board the church would excommunicate him yet with others in the church that keep it in the church it doesn't seem to make it to the first presidency.
7:25 My mom grew up in Utah and was not allowed to wear pants to school until her senior year of high school (early 70s). I'm so glad that has changed!
I sometimes wonder if this is even more concerning. As it gets smaller, it means the ones who don’t tolerate the shitty parts are leaving. The more extreme and blindly obedient ones are staying. It’s getting more and more dangerous.
Yo...it's coming down folks. The fact that Brad Mafakkin Wilcox gave the prayer means we are winning. When I heard that I was rofl. We got this lmao they are scared.
It seems exhausting to constantly have to do mental gymnastics to make your religion seem logical. So happy I got out as a teen, despite my parents trying to brainwash me.
I’m 26 years old and in the church. I still feel very self conscious if I feel like I’m wearing too short of a skirt/shorts or low cut shirts. I’m trying to work on that right now. It gets frustrating when you get self conscious because you feel like people will judge you for the clothes you wear. Luckily I have a very supportive husband that doesn’t care what I wear!
also noteworthy, i forget the guys name but he told an awful story of finding his infant baby dead in a bucket of water and then ended the story with a joke about how you should always listen to your wife's promtings- the audience laughed but i was personally still stuck on the deeply fucked up and tragic death of this baby. like who the hell put it in a bucket of water? how did that happen? is your wife okay?
The FSY stuff just feels like reputation laundering to me. I don't think it changes a thing about their draconian personal conduct policies, just makes it sound nicer. Big ol' MEH in my opinion.
@@ZelphOntheShelf it'll be interesting to see where the interpretation goes from here. My guess is it gets enforced in largely the same way. I don't honestly expect people to suddenly or gradually be ok with tattooed General Authorities for example now, but maybe I'm wrong!
@@ZelphOntheShelf also Sam, your reference to the older bf in Rexburg towards the end made me laugh out loud because I remember having those same "deep" conversations with him. Yikes.
Why is the church against surrogate mothers if they are worried about population loss? Like seriously gay families are doing a good job creating children and providing good homes.
Most people are raised to be psychologically dependent on Mormonism (which uses the same unfortunately effective psychological control mechanisms as all high-control groups) and those who join are usually doing so to get their needs for belonging/meaning met.
I remember the time when someone from my then ward indirectly implied that my then friend has better hair than mine because she never did something on hair her like her hair is natural while I have a colored hair at the time lol
I had a massive crush on my male young-men's leader. Can I blame him for wearing a suit on sunday (huge fetish of mine) or wearing tight shorts and tshirts on a week night? He drew me towards sin.
Hehe, soooo excited to get your candle out! And very much needed the venting...I've been having a hard time articulating why the way RMN said abuse was wrong bothered me so much, but basically YES to every word of what you said on that.
A thing many people didn't seem to catch about Holland's "musket" address at BYU was that he was talking to the faculty and administration. His call out about Easton's speech was to tell the administration that they should NOT have approved the talk in the first place.
Don't worry about how much you spent on a candle, I was already judging you for saying the phrase "money I have spent on a candle"! But actually my personality is not prone to judging the personal choices of others that are not hurting others, my reflexive disgust was actually a lingering memory of the multiple times I suffered severe allergic reactions to the candles burned, perfumes sprayed, & incense burned by my ex-wife as performative protests of the very idea that I could possibly have so many medically documented lifelong allergies to common chemicals used in cosmetic products!
I remember being told to put a shirt on over my swimsuit at a waterpark and because of that I wasn't allowed on some of the slides. I also remember a fellow Mormon teen telling me I shouldn't wear fake piercings because of the whole "whatsoever has the look of being evil is evil" type verse. Meaning that a fake piercing is just as bad as a real one lmao okay
I could see Jeffrey Holland weeping because we're gay and not going to go to the Celestial Kingdom I don't think he gives a shit about the struggle we go through I don't even think that's what he was in trying to imply I think he meant it in the same way that Christians we for Sinners because they're going to hell not because they're struggling
@@ZelphOntheShelf yes and it gets better: they have a 2$ coin called a toonie. Loonies and toonies. The loonie has a loon (bird) on it, so it actually makes a lot of sense they call it that, shows a good country wide 'cents' of humor 🤣
I'm worried for Zelph on the Shelf - between the frequency with which they remind us viewers "it's so hard to make a living as a content creator" and then also in this video in particular, reminding us viewers that mormonism is a dying church - I sure hope they're starting to plan to transition away from mormon commentary within the decade.
I feel sad when I watch your videos, knowing that you're my friends and I'm not your friend. If I met you, I'd be star struck and tongue tied. So it probably will never happen, but hey, if Matt Easton could kiss Tanner anything is possible.
No one knows who first wore pants, although it seems like probably men & women wore them at the same time. Makeup could be the same, I’m not sure, it appears from images that noble male Egyptians could’ve worn makeup as well as women. You seemed to say women wore pants first & men wore makeup. I don’t think that’s the case. Regarding “Mormons think that current America is the way things should be” that’s true, Christian’s do this too & it’s silly. Your ideology is also very “current day American”’though. This idea of equality & anti racism is an American ideology, this hasn’t existed historically. Animals, including human ones are naturally tribal & have been until very recently. We still are, but, its being attempted to be bread out of us, in certain context. In other context it’s still very acceptable.
Stop with the Trump comments unless your going to go on about Biden touching women and girls all the time. I like you guys. But stay away from things that are irrelevant to the church topics. All politicians have mega flaws But yes. I’m so happy to finally be out of what I consider now to be a cult. Wish I would have left wayyyyyy sooner! And I very much enjoy most of your content 👍🏻😁
You two look cute in your matching green tops. My opinion is that we all find “religion” organized or not. Seems like you’re a part of the religion to point out flaws of the LDS church which is cool-you’ve created a place for people to feel comfortable talking about their bad experiences etc… but I listened to lots of gen conference last weekend and thought the messages were solid - all about Jesus Christ, using our free will to choose loving kindness that Jesus taught, preparing ourselves and our loved ones for Jesus to come again. So if you believe in Jesus then it was pretty solid… Sadly in this world many people use and abuse others. The worst is child abuse. God will deal with the guilty imo, LDS people or not.. it’s just my belief I haven’t met God or Jesus but makes sense to me.. God gave us our free will to think and speak/act freely, the choice is ours what kind of life we will live. Be kind to yourself, be kind to others. Jesus really might come and restore peace in this wicked world. Much love y’all
thanks for the comment. it’s a false equivalence to say we’re anything like a religion. we don’t claim to represent god, we don’t demand obedience or offerings or participation. we don’t require people to believe unsubstantiated claims. if you believe child abuse is the worst (we would agree) then you may want to ask yourself why joseph smith, brigham young, john taylor, wilford woodruff and lorenzo snow married children. how is it any different than warren jeffs? you may also want to consider why the same pulitzer-prize-winning Spotlight journalist who blew the lid on the catholic sex abuse coverups also revealed the same types of coverups in the lds church.
I deny the church, Jesus and evolution. Very little actual verifiable science in the theory of evolution. Just lots of dogma sound familiar? Rusty is still a doofus
THERE ARE TWO DIFFERENT PEOPLE IN THE LDS CHURCH!!! THOSE LOOKING FOR A WAY IN AND THOSE LOOKING FOR A WAY OUT!!! BOTH WILL FIND WHAT THEY ARE LOOKING FOR!!!!!!!!!!!!
@@ZelphOntheShelf I myself have been on the raw edge of leaving as well!!! I will hold to the iron rod! I shall not cave in, I shall not give up, I shall not knucle under!!! The church is like Amway!!! Some give it their very best, but fall short of the goal!!! I am Autistic---what a wonderful gift!!!!!!!! No matter how hard some people try, they simply cannot wrap their heads around the Doctorine! My Austism has allowed me to see 360 degrees around it!!! If the Book Of Mormon is a fabrication, Joseph Smith had an advanced degree in Socio-Thermodynamics because he captured it perfectly!!! My IQ is through the roof, right around 160!!! I understand complex concepts!!! You are asking, how can someone who is Autistic be so smart??? I do not know, but I can very, very safely tell you that we as the Church of Jesus Christ are exceedingly blessed to have this in incredible hope of becoming more than what we are here in mortality!!! The Doctorine is good and solid!!! My wife died 10 years go of cancer! I have had the incredible opportunity to be with her since she died!!! She has comforted me when things have been at their worst!!! THEY DO LIVE!!! What is 5 years to us, is only 2 weeks to them. My wife still loves me and she herself still prays for me hoping with all she has that I will not fall---I promised her that Ii would hold strong!!! I WILL KEEP MY PROMISE!!!!!
aww!! ❤️ you can become a monthly patron at: www.patreon.com/zelphontheshelf or you can make a one time donation at: www.paypal.me/zelphontheshelf or on venmo: @samantha-shelley-1
I'm 54 and love hearing all the stuff from the kids your age. So smart and funny. I have grieved the loss of my stolen 42 years in this church, and now I live free and happy but your commentary is so good for helping people find a way out of religion. So thanks so much.
