It always messes with my head that the SAME men complaining that makeup is a "lie" ALSO criticize women for "not putting in any effort" if they don't wear makeup. Sorry I'm ugly, I guess. LOL (but, I HAVE a husband who likes my face just fine however I choose to present it so anybody else who wants to judge me can just go take a nap)
@@wildmanlopez9772i can tell from your other comments what kind of person you are.. seek therapy please. Also, DUH, obviously if thousands and thousands of people (especially men) constantly got shit to say about anything you do, say, or the way you look , it's gonna have an effect on you. If women were to do the same, you'd probably have a much worse reaction, trust me.
Honestly, at this point 2:53 I thought it is not even about difference in opinions. She could be telling him to take the trash out, or having a bad day and asking for comfort and help, and he'd still consider it a tantrum
If i rejected a man and he said “im the best you need to come to my house to find out, u have to be okay with kink and me having multiple women” id laugh in his face so hard spittle went everywhere 😂 what is that guy on
On that last one, if I told a man "No, I'm not interested" and he started going on about how good he is with ropes, I'd either vomit on the spot or call the cops because I think this guy is threatening to kidnap me. Bro, not everyone is into your kinks and talking about them to an unwilling person actually goes against everything BDSM is about.
I mean you should only bring up stuff like that if you are in a relationship with someone and asking them if they wanna try it. Not to some stranger you never met
@@jackmckeown7601 you don't have to be in a relationship to have a BDSM interaction, HOWEVER you should first get consent to even talk about kink, let alone propose a specific scene.
@@edenmairay60 Very understandable reaction. These topics aren't for everyone, and most of us actually in the community understand that. That guy is just creepy. Though I do want to mention that I'm also asexual and yet am a member of the BDSM community, BDSM isn't necessarily sexual in nature! I simply engage in the non-sexual types of play ;) I won't go into detail in case you find that uncomfortable, but if you're curious to know more, feel free to ask =D
I doubt any of these men have spent any time having a conversation with a woman. By conversation I mean talking back and forth, not talking at them, and actually listening to what they say.
I don't think most of them have even been in a room with a woman because they are too busy "creating wealth and abundance for themselves and the wolfpack." 😂
Dude says, stop looking at women, that's what they want! And I'm like, yes please, we DO want you to stop looking at us, we're just trying to live our lives!! ... Oh i see what he meant now. Either way, we win.
1:34 Another, more positive version of "alpha male" based on the software development term: A trans man very early in his transition, who is experimenting with his expression and finding out what's right for him.
I *hate* it when people say that women lie by wearing makeup. Makeup is not a lie, it's an expectation placed on us by other people, when you don't don't wear makeup you're seen as unprofessional (when not wearing it to work) and generally seen as less femine, especially by the same "alpha bros" that go around saying that it's a lie.
26:21 This guy creeps me out to no end. What he's saying does not work on grown-ass women. It works on teenagers who want to be seen as grown. This is a predator who pressures teens to go home with him, probably as the assistant manager of a movie theater.
Honestly i think the best comparison to makeup is clothing. You constantly find clothes that subtly change your appearance, you get high waisted pants to hide a tummy and make your legs look longer, you get clothing with a belt on the waist to create a different figure, you wear certain necklines to make your shoulders appear wider or thinner, you choose pieces with cutouts to show off those parts of your body and take away attention from other parts, you wear shoes that make you taller or even that shape your legs in various ways, underwear shapes and holds and tucks various bits for all genders, like. You never know what a person looks like under their clothing *really*. It's not catfishing. It's just looking different for diff circumstances. You'll find out what someone looks in the nude or without makeup when the time comes, if it does. It's not a lie. People who think this are bizarre
Also they 100% want you to have a subtle lip tint + blush + mascara combo or you're letting yourself go. Somehow shaving/covering greys isn't lying to them... they hate bold make up because it's obviously fake then expect women to be anything but natural. They want to be lied to but not notice.
No we don't think women have naturally sparkly eyelids or red lips. That's why we think women are lying because they are hiding their true beauty. It's very simple to understand.
@@EmmaJK42the reason people don't do tend to do that is because- #1 How do you know X random stranger is trans? #2 you're way more likely to be attacked by a cis man than any trans person
@@EmmaJK42 Exactly. It would be great if society applied the same logic to transgender people and stopped demonizing them and restricting their access to public spaces
@@EmmaJK42 When the statistic says that 90% of the perpetrators of violent physical assault are men, and 1 in 3 women are victims of physical/sexual violence in their lifetime, we are not talking about an isolated minority, is a gender problem.
Yeah fr and it's not like people who wear makeup don't know they have some basically like, paint on their face. Like i think makeup wearers KNOW that's not what they look like, that's the point and putting it on is really fun. Maybe some people should just say they don't like makeup without being so whiney and entitled about it. Nobody thinks I'm literally crying glitter dude but it's fun to be creative. I'm not "lying" (im also a MAN)
@@Eddysigalso unless you're really good at editorial makeup, makeup is extremely obvious. Expecially to the extent they describe. They describe women with painted faces and fun eyelooks. Not your average Jane trying to cover her dark circles. Edit to clarify. Most women who are considered as a catfish for wearing makeup are ones like me who do elaborate looks or go out of their way to look a certain way. And of course it is obvious it's makeup. I don't naturally have red lips with a brown line around them that are constantly shiny. It's lipliner, liquid lipstick and a gloss. It's obvious that this is not how I look right as I wake up from my bed. So there's no way I'm pretending to be someone I'm not. Because to trick someone you either have to be amazing at it or the other person has to be a dumbass for not realizing you're catfishing them.
26:39 I f'ing hate people who see dating as a "game". It should be about creating a bond with someone that means a lot to you, not about emotional manipulation.
@@ShinyTillDawn "I gave her the gifts and used the right dialogue options! This is supposed to unlock the sex scene! God, is the engine broken or something?!"
Right? Some of these *start* to sound **almost** healthy and then they go straight back down the drain again, you really think they’re gonna improve but they just so consistently disappoint
These alpha men influencers are so dangerous because their advice targets young impressionable teens/young men that are insecure, have been hurt by a girlfriend, have had a tough time on dating apps etc. They give vague tips that SOUND good and have tiny little nuggets of genuinely good advice (like staying away from someone who breaks up with you) but the REASON for the advice is toxic. It gets these people into the door of this mindset that grows until you get an "alpha male." They put ALL women into a box that crave attention, degradation, and abusive partners. It's disgusting.
@@saoirse2963ok so explain… I’m genuinely curious. How exactly is Jamie targeting young impressionable teens/young men that are insecure, have been hurt by a girlfriend, have a tough time on dating apps etc. What “tips” is Jamie giving to these people? When has Jamie put all women in a box that says they crave attention, degradation, and abusive partners?
I’m a trans man and I can confirm that women bow to me. I also bow to them. They bow to everyone else too. So do I. I’m a martial artist. (And probably unfunny)
excuse me big bro but i must inform you that one of the transfemmes have gotten out of containment and have driven a train to a bank to rob it, pls help meee :(
My guy, you just made my day! I’m a martial artist too. Sometimes I have man falling to my feet (they’re falling for me!!!), and sometimes I’m falling to other people’s feet.
My cis guy housemates were talking about how enjoyable it is to walk home from work at night, and how much they enjoy the quiet of the park, etc etc, and I just started laughing. Just the most AMAB thing ever to experience.
I've always liked walking at night - it's never occurred to be that the fact that I'm bearded, 6''1", and over 200 pounds might have been factors in my assumption it's safe to do so. Thanks for sharing a truth I had never known. At least I can say I've never turned down a woman's request to walk them home, or to a bus or subway (I'm gay, so no threat personally).
As a cis woman I've also always enjoyed walking alone in the dark, and still do. But I know I've been lucky in many ways too, not having to become fearful. The places I've lived in, previous experiences, practical style (trainers especially let me move quietly and efficiently, so much easier to avoid being noticed in the first place), and natural skill in rudely ignoring anyone bothering me without even slowing down have all probably helped me sneak through life for four decades this far without any threatening situations. Of course there's still been some men approaching and trying to keep going after the first no from me, but none of them have tried to physically stop me from leaving. I know that statistically most women will experience some harassment in their life regardless of what they do, but I have refused to let that stop me from enjoying my alone time in the dark. And since I've challenged myself with this so much since my teens, I've only become less and less fearful over the years. (On the other hand I'm somewhat afraid of big crowds in the daylight, and situations where I need to be social, which is pretty much why I love being alone in the first place.)
I'm aroace, I don't ever want creeps thinking they could ever change my no to something else. They are just jealous that men who deal with their issues instead of repressing then and turning angry have far better and happier lives.
Guy saying he rejects a woman's rejection muttered something about kink so casually and then glossed over it. Like bro that's not something you can gloss over. to quote John Oliver, Sex (and in this case Bondage) is like boxing, if both dont consent one of you has committed a crime. You really cant gloss over your "mastery of ropes"...
I'm taking sociology as a dual credit class rn and yesterday's assignment was the "gendebread person". it essentially had 3 sets of "sliders". one for gender identity from agender to man and woman. another for gender expression from androgynous to masculine and feminine. and the last one was sex organs and characteristics which were from asex to male and female. other sliders were for romantic and sexual attraction from nobody to men/masculinity and women/femininity. It also correctly identified bisexual as being attracted to people like and unlike your gender identity. it also included the Kinsey scale. This is at a Texas public community college
>this is at a Texas Fake and gay. Fake because you said this happened in Texas and gay because midgets arouse me In case it wasn't obvious, this is an admittedly god-awful joke
I swear, sometimes I wonder if conservative men ACTUALLY want to be conservative, cuz like- last time I checked, knk & non-monogamy are extremely liberal 😂
@@Sly-Moosesomeone did a study on kink and political affiliation. Raceplay threesomes and ahem illegal activities. Were conservative majority kinks. Age stuff and noncon were the most right
As someone who is a member of the BDSM community that last one made me facepalm so hard. If someone says Not interested you respect that. I don't care about your "mastery of kink." You will look like a jerk & the kink community will call you out on your nonsense. Consent is the number 1 rule in the kink community followed by respecting safewords & preferences, after care, etc. Someone saying no or not interested that isn't them playing a game to "sidestep" it's them telling you to stop trying to flirt with them because your not their type or they're already in a relationship. Also I swear any time I hear an "Alpha male" talk about kink it's always about how great they are with like bondage such as rope. Like sure if rope is a preference for you cool but not everyone is into rope or bondage. It depends on the person & also if these guys think kink is just about bondage &/or whips then they don't realize that is just the tip of the iceberg. That's not to say that they should go deeper unless they're comfortable & they learn to treat women like people not objects, it's just interesting how many time they use bondage as like a: "Look at how badass I am & kinky I am" while breaking or ignoring every rule in the kink community since all thet care about is dominanting instead being a good partner
You don't make eye contact with women because you don't respect them, I don't make eye contact with women because they're pretty and scare me, We are not the same!
Just give a respectful closed-mouth smile with a head bob, then look away (looking too long makes women uncomfortable). If you're not sure how to do it, do some people watching. (This advice is only applicable in the US, and possibly not in New York City.)
Primarily the Auditions where people have long speeches begging for another chance after they all say no... OR the ones who refuse to leave or say they are "Too good for them anyway" 😂
2:27 oh this guy. Btw there’s this guy called Vinhy Marchi who did a banger of a song called “sad sad alpha man” as a response to one of his videos. He has also done a song called “the tale of the lesbian hunter”. I highly recommend both.
Makeup on women is such a trap. Firstly, men have worn cosmetics throughout history; fashion changes all the time and from one society to another. Second, it's a lose/lose proposition for women. If they don't wear makeup then they get comments on having imperfections or looking drab, but when they do it's 'lying' despite the expectation to look their best at all times. (Also, beards are equivalent to makeup; if a man's whole point of wearing one is an improvement in appearance, then it's just as just as deceptive as makeup, even if it grows naturally.)
Weirdly, I'm getting the vibe that the one who kept pushing for young men to only concentrate on themselves in their 20's and 30's is an AroAce not out to himself yet. I could be totally off base, but it just feels like he's deep in denial about his own orientation and identity.
17:21 It's been a few decades since I did my degree in linguistics, but back then linguists were all about describing how languages are actually used, not in assigning value judgements about which words were better or more correct let alone beautiful.
The first guy made me curl into myself. If he said that to me, if I didn’t deck him, I’d walk out, block the hell out of him, and make a phone call. Also, the linguistics thing was the stupidest thing ever and I’m pissed off on behalf of my future profession.
Fun fact: the whole “Alpha/Beta” dynamic is actually inspired by a particular study of Wolf pack behaviour. Extra fun fact: That very study has been widely discredited (by even the very person who created the study).
i love that a huge consistency between your videos is you going "WAIT, this doesn't make ANY sense! Why does anyone believe this?!" and then you have to wait a beat, and say "oh right, there's no logic here"
That level up guy is clearly too young and inexperienced to know that he doesn't have ultimate control over his career. You can be your best self and still the company can randomly lay you off. If you start your own business the market may change and leave you deeply in debt. He thinks he can avoid the sucker punches of life. Poor dear thing. He will learn.
Why do these guys always think that women will take their money. So you shouldn't give any women attention. They know they can give attention to people without spending money right ? Go to the park, spend time together. Talk and listen. Go to a free local event or smth, cook some food and go have a picnic idk. I feel like I rarely spend money when I hang out with people. I give gifts occasionally and if we go eating out I can occasionally splurge. But I also can not do that and I don't think it'll impact my relationships with people.
2:41 I know this guy, he went viral last year for chasing women at night down poorly lit streets while breathing in manic tones just to test thier reaction and then tell them '''no need to react like that''
I've seen a few videos of these "professional dating coach" types. They seem to thrive on the idea that "if you disgust a woman enough for her to get angry, you've won because she's now emotionally invested in interacting with you".
1:59 *GASP* IT'S "THE SAD SAD ALPHA MAN! Seriously, go watch the music video, Vinny Marchi has a follow - up with The Lesbian Hunter (which you should also listen to, lol).
@@Indigo_Shard I ran into his stuff on shorts, I've watched videos of his on RU-vid but I haven't tried just downloading the songs; I would imagine he'd have that info at the ends of his videos (I haven't paid attention) and places to download are usually in the description.
I think I understand now. "Alpha Male" means doing whatever is least likely to make a woman want to have a relationship with you, so you can blame them for it.
Also, "violent crime" statistics are an umbrella covering any type of crime leading to the injury of the victim. This includes guys getting into fights at bars, gang members having a shoot out, men who get shot/hurt during a robbery, etc. Which is not the same situation as "I got attacked walking down the street". To compare men and women's chance of being a victim while walking alone at night you'd have to look into those specific cases. Not overall crime rates.
Another thing to consider is that women are more fearful of violent crime at night so tend to be more cautious and not put themselves in the situation where it will happen. Men being less cautious put themselves in riskier situations which would allow for more crimes to happen to them.
20:40 on the spot LMAO, he's a pure satire channel on RU-vid and TikTok that mocks Alpha Male Grifters, funny seeing him show up here, these are all btw clips of him editing himself in
(7:25) That's also violent crimes. What about non-violent crimes? Harassment? Situations that never were crimes because the person managed to negotiate themselves out of it? So much gets unreported.
@@EmmaJK42 There are plenty of people who have kids who shouldn’t, I had at least 2 friends at school whose parents were more interested in feeding their addictions then feeding their kids
The only thing that could have possibly redeemed that last one would be if a woman rejects you ask her why so you can work on that and maybe get the next person
8:00 the most successful lie is that being rich means your talented or better than everybody who is poor, even when you were handed your wealth by your parents and haven't actually worked a day in your life
Finally bought your book recently. :) Haven't had a chance to read it yet, but I'm looking forward to it. I'm hoping it can be useful for my mother when I come out. She's 74, but is thankfully a huge ally towards trans people and LGBTQ in general. However, I'm still nervous because I had a negative experience with her when I was in my early twenties when I started dating a woman. I still thought I was cis at that time, so this is only relevant towards sexuality. She was offhandedly supportive, but extremely distant. It hurt so much. She never asked about my girlfriend. Never wanted to get to know her. Never asked how our relationship is going. Radio silence. After we broke up, mom went back to being involved in my life. She was unbelievably thrilled when I started dating my now fiance who is a cis man. She adores him to a somewhat creepy level. The massive difference in behavior from her murdered my soul. It took a couple of years to get over the pain. I even broke down in front of my then therapist, who was, thankfully, LGBTQ friendly. All this to say that, even though I know my mother is a huge ally, when it comes to her own children, it's a different story. Coming out as non-binary is going to be difficult because I'm not sure she'll understand, which is why I'm hoping the book will come in handy. Being that I'm 42, I'm hoping she doesn't think it's a phase or that I'm confused. As if I haven't spent most of my life being confused about myself. Anyhoo, thank you, Jaime, for writing your book. I read the back pages and was pleasantly surprised at all the trans influencers you included. :)
I've actually alpha-tested a game before. Lots of placeholder assets, missing assets, when it's in an alpha stage you're just gauging what the core gameplay is and if it works. You don't wanna invest a bunch of time in polish before you have something fun.
"Women do X" "Men do X too, even if in a different way." "Well, women do it more!" Why does everything have to be a war or competition with these losers? Men and women are alike in a lot of ways. Treat each other with respect instead of trying to "defeat" or "tame" them, and your relationships will be healthier.
Appolgizes for the rant as wolves are a special interest of mine: Fun fact the term "Alpha male" mostly comes from a very much now debunked study on wolves where the person conducting the study believed that there was a hierarchy in wolves with alphas being the leaders in charge & betas being the more submissive members of the pack. He later realized after writing a book on this phenomenon that this hierarchy only tends to occur in wolves in captivity like at a zoo but doesn't occur in nature. This is due to wolves being put into a smaller environment than they're used to & being unable to do what they would do in nature as often times the enclosure will have wolves from different packs that did not grow together & thus could become extremely aggressive towards the new wolf that enters what the other wolf or wolves see as they're territory which then leads the the myth of Alpha (dominant) & Beta (submissive) hierarchy. It's even worse when pups are involved because the parents will protect those pups at all cost. There are several reasons that this doesn't happen in the wild: 1st wolves are able to stay out of each others territory unless they A) Want to challenge the leaders of the pack. B) They want to join the pack & thus will try to appeal to the leaders (dominant pairs) or C) Just happened to be passing through & don't want any trouble. 2. The pack is made of dominating breeding pairs (leaders), submissive breeding pairs (offspring of the dominant pairs) & non breeding pairs (caretakers, enderly, or wolves that have joined the pack and they leave the breeding to stronger pack members) this ensures that all members are cared for while having healthy pups who can survive on their own or in a pack. Now when a pup gets old enough they can either stay with their birth pack & become apart of a submissive breeding pair or non breeding pair, try to become a leader in their birth pack by challenge one of the leaders, or go out into the world to find their own pack. Lastly 3. They care very deeply for each other & will do what they can to help their pack members out, including but not limited to helping bring food to pups who can't leave the den yet or the more vulnerable members who keep to the den until they need to move, younger wolves will eat the tougher meat while leaving the softer meat for the elderly vulnerable who struggle pull tougher meat from the bones, letting the wolves that are the hungiest eat first, & when traveling, the vulnerable members will be in the middle with the stronger pack members in front and beyond. This ensures that if attacked, the stronger members can form a circle around the vulnerable members to keep them safe. Be warned, though this is also a technique used when hunting to so if you see one wolf know that there are usually more and they're either a hunting party or out with the pups so it's best to keep an eye on them while putting someone distance between yourself and them for both their safety and yours since if they circle you it usually means they're likely about attack once they have you completely surrounded. Also make sure not to turn your back or run until you have a good distance on them, and they're completely out of line of sight because they will see you as prey to hunt if you run while your too close &/or in line of sight
4:07 Or stared at. And if you're afab (cis or trans, doesn't matter), you KNOW the stare I'm talking about. That stare that undresses you with their eyes and makes you feel so viscerally uncomfortable, that it makes you sick to your stomach and you feel like you're about to vomit. I used to get that stare a lot, especially as a child🤮 they've gotten a lot less since I got top surgery though😮💨😮💨
Jamie said that the guy doesn't sound very straight but I heard something different, like... "You feel worse about yourself when you look at women" Sir, when did you notice that you get gender dysphoria from looking at other women? "You feel bad when you linger in the women's section of a clothing store" Sir, when did you notice you get gender dysphoria from envying other women for their clothing styles? 😂
If you are in the alpha of your friend group, that means that you consider everyone around you to be like your kids, you’re the parent friend. Also, that whole Alpha thing in wolves is not true, the leader of the pack is the leader because their parents not because they’re more dominant than others.
As a femboy this is funny to watch. And as someone who uses nail polish and having tried lipstick I can say that it doesn’t lie at all, it just improves how you look. Also I just like to have my nails painted, they look pretty. Don’t @ me
I am a trans woman, being cat called is uncomfortable. Also men don't stalk and walk home with a random woman this is very scary for us women. Both of these things have legit happened to me. these are thing that shouldn't happen but it does.
26:11 STRANGER DANGER! STRANGER DANGER! This is very much like a kidnapping scenario. It would be different if you didn't reject him, and were already talking sexy with each other. BUT, if you reject him and his follow up is "Come to my house~" then don't go with him. he's already not respecting your rejection, what makes you think he'll give consent. Stay safe out there ladies. always have a defensive weapon on you just in case it escalates. you all are beautiful, and deserve all the respect in the world
It's interesting how often there's nuggets of truth in here. Like the guy who was talking about how men should "level up". If you cut away the nonsense, there is nuggets of pretty positive advice. -Focus on yourself before getting into a relationship -You can only change the things you have control over -Don't tie your existence and purpose to the opposite sex I can't tell if he actually knows this deep inside and it's just been tainted or if it's a fluke.
That's by design. If those viewers take the bad advice and inevitably get rejected, they'll feel even more lonely and sexually frustrated, and keep coming back.
I went on a date with a guy once and he told me that he asked me out because I don’t wear makeup and he thought the natural look was hot but I was wearing makeup and he just couldn’t tell 🫤
Mr. Professional Dating Coach has to film his videos in his car. Probably he can't do it in the house because his girlfriend gets mad when she hears him say that shit.
That last one disturbed me. He's basically encouraging sexual violence, rape, maybe even kidnapping. Not to mention touting. As a goth girl I have been catcalled so many fucking times, men were stupidly trying to hit me up just for jokes or thinking I would be up for their kinks. Nope! But thankfully I'm not a girly gurl so I don't look particularly vulnerable, quite the opposite so typically it's easy to brush them off. That's one of the reasons I don't wear dresses, any time I'm wearing one I feel unsafe and more vulnerable. That's also based from my traumas so I'm distrustful and always having my guard up.
I don't hate the guy who talked about levelling up. I think he said it horribly, but "in your 20s you have the freedom to explore what you want, and once you have kids and a mortgage that's going to be harder" is not the worst advice I've ever heard.
Having seen the "don't accept rejection" clip a few times now, I keep pausing on him talking about helping men understand the female mind, as it feels like he thinks there is one female mind that every woman shares.
Misogyny is systemic. Even as a feminist I don't just escape that. It's the default setting so active and consistent work is necessary to check in and revise to manually keep the scale on equity. A ton if it is in the unconscious, too. That is how all forms of systemic discrimination suck!
