How to *ACTUALLY* make high value female friends as an adult | tips // advice + more 

I had a friend that would constantly trauma dump on me. So much so that I would avoid her phone calls. When I finally decided to communicate to her what the problem was, she didn’t receive it well.

I feel so isolated at times. I never had a solid girl group. I keep to myself because I see people’s true colors now. I’m definitely going to start implementing your tips! Thank you for sharing!

Correct! It’s ok to not make a bestie every time and I’m learning this!

I have a so-called “best friend” who only remembers I exist when she has news for me. She rarely reaches out to check-in. When I check-in with her, it takes her weeks to reply. Also, when she meets new people, it’s as if I don’t exist. I won’t hear from her for months, and then I’ll receive a message starting with “OH MY GOD JENN…” Girl, I have a toddler now, I’m too exhausted chasing him around, I ain’t got time for this! 😂 She has definitely been demoted from best friend, she doesn’t know how to be one.

This is 100% your look. It’s giving Elite Barbie😎

Cutting some friends off and creating room for new ones has been one of the best decisions I’ve ever made.

Life has definitely been different for me after having a kid but I’m more focused on self development and self care so this video came at the perfect time

I find it very hard to make female friends, easier with men. For me to be friends with a woman, we really have to have a lot in common and think alike. I find many women not liking me, I think I intimidate them, I have this boss chic aura and then the jealousy and competition enters (something I don’t need). Once I notice that it’s deuces !

Thank you for this video. Insecure women don’t make good friends! I can’t wait to make friends with women who love themselves and KNOW they’re all that like me!

True! My friend of 25 years started acting funny and stopped talking to me after I got married last year. I still cry and she’s right - it IS devastating

I really needed this. I have a friend who is so unhappy with her life that every conversation is her angry and complaining. I don’t mind listen but it’s constant venting with no efforts to find a solution. It’s so draining.

My closest friends were great until I started becoming more successful. Taught me I do not want anyone in my life that is in an unhealthy competition with me. Being inspired is way different from being envious and fake. And I’ve learned that mental health is important for everyone. So important things I put on my list is are TRUST, an equally yoked friendship. Someone who will show up for me genuinely not just to be in my business , have leverage over me or have the satisfaction of seeing me down. I also want people who will make an effort to have healthy communication and loyalty. I don’t want to be the therapist friend who is the only one trying to solve issues in the group unless the group is going to do the same in return. I don’t do anything to receive anything in return. However it’s truly exhausting being the one doing all the pouring into others and no one is pouring into you.

Sis you are speaking my language, so many friends I let go of because of it being a one sided relationship, which became Uber draining. I now have a friend who I met online via me doing business and we have become such great friends although we live in different states. We are ambitious women and we support each other via encouraging words when we are dealing with romantic relationships, family members or our business ventures. I made it a point to become the person I want to attract, I don't wait for someone to speak positive affirmations to me I speak them over myself each morning after I thank God for waking me up. Loving this video❤ 🔥🔥🔥Subscribed!

Hi Valie does not mean expensive. It does not mean wearing expensive clothing or accessories. It means having self respect, being loyal to those close to you, and those commited to improving themselves as human beings, not just materially.

I love the energy that is radiating through my screen right now. It's hard to find Women who are truly honest with themselves about their own faults and where they fall short in their relationships. I have been doing a lot of self reflection and reflecting on the relationships I have and I came to the conclusion that neither aspect is exuding the energy that I desire. I'm so happy this video popped up on my feed because I truly needed to see it. Also I'm literally a therapist so I'm the default therapist friend and it can be so draining but I'm setting my boundaries day by day.

This is great stuff. It’s how my bff and I met. She didn’t just exchange numbers, but sent a message at the end of the day, saying it was good meeting. Next day, she was already asking to meet the following weekend at a specific time. After that, she asked to meet again, basically she meant business 😂 I got the point, and also put in the work after, but if she hadn’t followed up initially, I don’t think we would be where we are now a few years later. I think for many, the problem isn’t meeting ppl, it’s cultivating it, and building intimacy. They meet ppl, but maybe both aren’t ready for a close friendship, or they aren’t sure how to be vulnerable and put in the work needed. Honestly, it’s best to do it with someone like you, similar interests, similar lifestyle, even income. I say the latter because if one person wants to go out to a steakhouse, and your budget is McD, it can cause issues. One person may want to travel, but if you don’t have travel budget, can affect it all. Even similar music interests, will allow you guys go to same concerts.

So true. You are who you hang around.

I’m definitely working on not making the conversation about me . I’m aware of it. I realized i didn’t want the person to feel alone & i too have been through that before . definitely something i am actively working on

I’ve been working on myself and thinking a lot about attracting a new circle of good, high quality friends! I’ve lost some pretty close relationships but they were not all good, which is why I don’t have them anymore but seeing this video is confirmation that I’m on the right track!

Love this Jaz💗. Something I definitely had to learn was to be unapologetic about showing up as my best self and knowing my worth. I’ve had a lot of experiences where I’d find someone I thought is my friend is lowkey constantly comparing themselves to me…and in an effort to make them feel more comfortable I made myself smaller and brushed off shady comments. The more I really learned my self worth the less I could even tolerate being handled a certain way in both romantic relationships & friendships.

I love how beautifully you explained this! I'm definitely the low maintenance friend, and I cannot wrap my entire life around someone 24/7. I'm here whenever they need, and I will also be there to listen and check in, visit, etc. I think I used to feel bad for 1. not understanding that this was just the kind of friend I am and that it's OK 2. giving my all to a higher maintenance friend because of the shame/guilt put onto me. In return it really drained me of my energy and I had to find a way to create boundaries for those kinds of friends.

Jasmine, I’m old enough to be your Mother but i follow you for inspiration b/c I’ve considered starting a similar channel for women over 40. I also love caring for my skin but not so much as an influencer but more on a health side. You are so different from other beauty influencers AND other members of your sorority. You are transparent and there is something so genuine about you that I just don’t see in some of the others. You spoil yourself but you’re not bragging, if that makes sense. You actually encourage others in a way that’s just not fake and I love it. I really do. You inspire this ole Mama. I follow you on TT as well. Keep up the good work!

As an older woman my true friends are the ones I grew up with. New people that come in to my life are just associates. True loyalty is my friend's that been in my life from elementary school. I do not trust easily. I appreciate your tips. Blessings!🙏

Love this video! I used to be the therapist friend & now I’ve learned to set boundaries. I especially agree with getting around people who hold the same values and standards!

I'm doing all of these things, I just need to do a list of qualities I want in my friends and start planning activities to do with others. Thanks for the wholesome discussion, no stone was left unturned.

Hope one day I can have women like you in my circle.

Hi Jaz! Again you hit the nail on the head, losing a friend is such a traumatic experience. Everybody can not come with you in certain periods in your life and that is totally okay! Keep going, loving this content!

Wow this whole video is gold! The way you articulated your points deeply resonated & put into words what I’ve been trying to process about my friendships for a long time. Thanks for sharing your insights ✨

I love that she started with the idea of working on YOU!! Knowing yourself and showing up as a good version of you. Manifesting is such a positive great tool!

You're the mentor I've needed for so long. You absolutely have no idea how grateful I am to have stumbled across your channel. THIS WAS EXCELLENT ADIVCE AND EXACTLY WHAT I NEEDED TO HEAR!! THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH!

I love how you break it down to its simplest form… Their descriptions are right on.❤

Thanks, good content! I recently ended two (20 year friendships) with two different people because of what you mentioned in this video. And yes, it has been lonely at times. However, what's important is that everyone is NOT meant to go on every journey with you, so know when to let them off the ride.

Brilliantly done. I’m currently undergoing the pruning process with my friend group and it has been surprisingly simple to the point that I’m barely emotionally affected by their departure. Now comes the time to refill those empty slots with like-minded women looking to elevate.

I found you recently , I’ve been in Atlanta for 6 years, and had the worse experience with friends. I’ve spent months working in myself because all this time I thought I was the problem. Thanks to your videos and other woman that inspire me , I realized I am NOT the problem. Thank you for this , you’re amazing 💓

Girl you are so me! The amount of times I screamed EXACTLYYY is ridiculous lol . Thank you for this 💕

Im alone now but Im not lonely. Loved the video. 💕💕 Cant wait to meet my tribe. 😊

This video came into my feed at the perfect time. I really needed this confirmation. You have a new subscriber and Im happy to be apart of this community as it grows. 🌸 Thank you.

Hey JAZ! Ive been watching your videos since last week and you have truly become a virtual mentor to me. I remember a time when I was the friend who realized that I was trauma dumping on all of my friends in the past. And when I would realize, I would go incognito because I would feel bad that I had told them so much pain instead of considering how they truly felt. I am in a period in my life that I am healing daily and I am beginning to isolate to truly glow back up from everything I went through from friendships, past relationships, etc. I eventually want to put myself back out there when I want to make friends again. I am going to be 29 in 2 weeks and I really have reignited myself on my healing journey. You ever feel like you hit a hurdle or a bump in the road to then actually stop and have time to reflect on how you've REALLY been towards others? This is currently me rn :) Thank you so much and I LOVE your videos. Please continue to spread your likemindness and informing. It's really helping us! ♥️

Great tips. As an accomplishment woman with a full life I really didn’t think of making new friends for years. Now in my 40s I value and work on maintaining friendships more.

What I NEEDED today🙌🏽Thank you, I am in love with your videos and your energy! You go girl❤️‍🔥

I had a friend who I did so much for. Like I went above and beyond yet when I went thru the darkest period in my life she was nonexistent. Barely checked in. Then tried to one up and say she was going thru her own shit to notice mine rather than take accountability for her actions. I had to cut ties because not only did she ghost, she didn’t even try to actively make amends after I told her how I felt and and I realised I was the one keeping the relationship alive lol

Was running out of ppl to watch for motivation purposes and this grabbed my attention. New subscriber!

I truly love this. I was talking to myself about needing to find new friends of value. I’ve let so many people go. Because of a lot of situations you talked about. Love the energy and for the advice. Definitely would be using.

Your channel is everything I’ve been looking for. Thank you for your content ❤

I’m so ecstatic that you did this video, I’ve been thinking about this topic so much and his was so helpful ! Thank Jaz ❤

This video is so A1 especially for times we are in now. I’m definitely using every said in this video as affirmations because this is what I want to see in my reality. Thank you so much Goddess for shedding light on this. So many want everything you said in this video but don’t know the words and every word you dropped speaks volumes. Once again Thank you Goddess ❤😊

12:48pm I know this video was made 6 months ago but I feel it’s very necessary for me to comment… I commend you Jaz! You are a very positive, motivational and inspiring woman! I thank God for coming in contact with your channel. I have learned so much from watching your videos and I appreciate the time and energy you pour into your videos. I thank you for your transparency and your honesty! There have been many things I have already known about myself; however I just needed to hear it aloud to admit it to myself. And I also love the fact that you have reminded me of who I once was and where I went wrong in my life that has caused me to become who I don’t want to be. Thanks to you I have really noticed sooooo much about myself and people that I have been around- just by listening to you. Sometimes we as females need to hear certain things from another perspective to pinpoint hidden issues and decipher how to handle situations. Thank you so much!!! Thank God for you! I appreciate you and I pray your channel continues to grow and expand gracefully!!! God bless you hun!!!!

You need to be two things for your friends, that they need to be for you - kindness and an abundance mindset. When life gets tough, you'll be grateful for having unfailingly kind and encouraging people. Ask anyone that's hit rock bottom.

This is so me, perfectly explained dear! Great advice all throughout this video! I agree 💯 want friends on your level, self assured but humbled at the same time and in alignment with your morals and values. Keep in mind associates and friends are different. I seek friends want those with a high and positive vibration with a beautiful energy and when were not we give ourselves grace and encourage each other.

We are so similar lol I feel you on being a low maintenance friend I can’t talk everyday and also I hate a “friend” who only talks about themselves ! This was a really good video I will be manifesting better friends!

Just went through a friendship breakup. I got tired of the disrespect and the constant need to diminish myself and my day to day accomplishments to appease her. I wish her well but I feel way more at peace and just free to accomplish my goals more than ever now. A bestie that I do still have is so beautiful and badass. We’re actually working on a business together. We’re both in the medical field and have worked our butts off to get where we are now. We motivate each other to want more and want better for ourselves.

This has me looking at my friendships and it's interesting how some things pan out. I especially like the advice on having different friends for different things. We're diverse and unique and therefore it makes sense that we will have many types of friends. I also like the idea of "dating" your friends. I actually do this with one of the friends we call our outings dates! Also good to note that every person you initially connect with might not pan out and that's okay too. Also to note that "high-value" is what we interpret as high value NOT what someone on social media says is high-value. I think high-value are people you vibe with.

Felt like this was a podcast, love the content thank you ❤

This was so good Jaz!

I have tried so many times to get my friend to minimize the gossip because I am witnessing it ruin her life but she just will not end it

AMO DEMASIADO TU CONTENIDO ACTUAL. MUCHAS GRACIASSS ✨👑🥰

We would definitely get along lol because I’m definitely a low maintenance friend but also valuable and caring.

This video just helped me soo much. This has been on my mind for sometime so the qualities you have mentioned really give me an amazing go-ahead on my journaling prompt regarding this issue.❤ Thank you for this

❤ love love love when she talked about having defensive women friends and most of the time they are the ones that make everything about them and their issues.

This was so very very helpful. I have wanted to find new high-value female friends in my life. This has provided me a good running start. As a fashion designer and female who has accomplished much in my life it sometimes is difficult to find friends. This is good.

You bring up pertinent information regarding friend groups. Regarding the trauma dumping, you might want to inquire about the relationship dynamics that incite that response as well as having that person research attachment styles. Is that person experiencing a healthy friendship dynamic? Is that person able to discuss that dynamic freely and make adjustments? How is conflict handled in that friendship? Has there been room for resolution and necessary adjustments? If not, why?

So so helpful! Thank you for making this video I have been struggling to make friends as an adult ( I literally have two and one of them is my sister lol) so I will use all these tips to put myself out there.

Thank you. This is solid advice. I am low-maintenance and prefer to have friends that are the same way. I am shy and trying to slowly come out of that. I am in my 30s and realizing that making friends is difficult. I find it helpful taking the lead and being more direct with people for them to follow-up as well.

I love your content Jaz! Please continue creating inspiring content like this.

I Love Love Love this! And I loved the step-by-step tips on how to meet & start high-value friendships! 👏🏽🔥❤️

Excellent video! I took notes to keep me on track when it comes to manifesting my own tribe and the type of people I'm trying to attract. I've been doing a lot of self-development and self-awareness work.

Thank you darling. Words of wisdom were given here and I have most certainly noted them down. Time to make healthier relationship choices in general. ❤

chileeeeee i had to cut off a few friend that used me like a free therapist but never invited me out fror anything like girl no talk to your friends that you go out with and if you knew how many friends only spoke to me to. gossip and trauma dum i had to cut off it was so annoying. mad that a goal that i wouldnt gossip or be a counsulor for them and they just faded away and im fine with it.

The best I’ve seen on this topic

Loved all of this! Thank you for making this video!

This literally showed up in my news feed as a suggestion when I've come to a time where I just raised all my children, so definitely huge season change and I did not really make a lot of friends but I had different connections that always look to me for support. I feel I have served my time of giving to those connections that I felt led to support emotionally. It also helped me to use my gifts which are kind of like counseling then also intuitive gifts which prepared me for the field that I work in now weren't I'm now a top ranking advisor. Now I just want to get paid to help people lol And I can be paid to be an ear because I did it for free for decades but now it's time for fun because my children are gone and all I have is time for myself. It's funny cuz I'm advising people all day and helping people all day and I even tell women how some men that they're trying to go after are not the ones for them because they are low value men or men that won't even value them right. So I just love your video and most definitely on time in my life right now. This title literally hits the nail on the head for where I'm at and what I need now.. there is no better prayer that is so specific than to say I need high value friends😂❤🙏. Sorry so long, I use my microphone lol This is truly what time it is in my life

I genuinely loved all of this video! TY❤

I really enjoyed this! ❤

Yes girl you hit this right on!

This is good commentary. Knowing how to pick your friends. Particularly high value women friends.

Your hair is so perfect ❤

This was wonderful enjoyed your perspective ❤

Hi I’m new to your channel. I must say that enjoyed it, so much positive vibes, elegance and truth❤❤❤

You look amazing and this video quality out of this world! Love this Jaz

💜 Love everything about this! It’s exactly what I needed at this time of my life! New subscriber!

Yesssssssss Jaz I am a High Valued Women friendships PERIOD

Great video Jaz! Thank you ❤

Period! I love this girl new sub such queen energy ❤

Your so right. I needed this video ❤

Thank you for this video! I’ve been struggling to make friends as an adult because I feel like most interactions are awkward for me but this video honestly helped me a lot. New subbie 🎉☺️

Skin and makeup flawless. Said my piece now I’ll continue watching

2 minutes in and loving this already

Jaz you look gorgeous gal, Thank you 🙏🏾 i believe when you work on yourself first you attract high value friends.

the calendar invite is a new one for friends! I have to try🤣

Love it i pushed some people away i wish i heard it sooner to just allow certain friends to be for certain things ❤

I love this content. Also, I don't know anyone who is not defensive when someone tells them about themselves regardless of the information being correct. I think it's also the audacity of someone telling someone about themselves as if there is not a list of things they should be working on as well...and that's usually where the defensiveness comes from. Also to note: If you open a can of worms to "tell" a friend "about themselves" be ready for them to say something about you. I had a friend ask me about herself, and after I told the truth, she told me something about me. So, the next time she started with a question about herself I simply asked, "Now, do you really want the answer, or do you really have something to say about me and this is the set up for you to give me this information? When she looked perplexed, I explained how I derived to that conclusion. I don't have time to play games in any relationship. Needless to say, she was too much and we are no longer close.

I feel this wholeheartedly.

5:30 love it. Thanks for a valuable video 💗

Friends that know when to go home…yyeeessss 😂🎉. i felt that. Omg im always sending my friend’s positive things

It's crazy to me how much so many of us want meaningful freiendships, yet we remain without them for so long. Here's to never giving up on finding our girlfriend tribe! ❤

This is SO good! Thank you for sharing 💕

You look absolutely stunning!! Very classy

Its even harder when its family gossiping jealous trauma dumping and more so i cut some off and will love some from a distance friends were a bit easier but still feel bad and miss them

I attract toxic and unstable “friends” I’m friendless now because it’s so draining being the counselor and bestfriend to all these people that have no mental stability. I had to pray and cut these people off. And I’m happy I did. I had to self talk myself and told myself I am a high value friend and that’s all I want to attract. This is something I’ve been working on and so far so good. I love me and I need people on that same level.

This was such a great video… so insightful!