This really spoke to me: taking it as a sign that your presence is not loveable because the people around you don't love your presence and realizing you're around the wrong people and it's not really a you problem. So true!!
Girl, you nailed it! I want to exude main character energy! Its why I got off of social media. I no longer am interested in watching other women be the main character, I am busy being the main character in my life! It's so refreshing and took years to embrace.
@Aya your comment is exactly what I needed to see! Social media (SM) is so problematic for me. It has me doubting my MF hard earned brilliance!!!! I see SM unfairly comparing me (or me comparing myself to tinier waists, photoshop apps, people lying about their relationships n lives as a whole, BBLs, and making me feel so less than even though I'm healthy, educated, mothered n nursed 3 little boys, kind, super loving, and super fit. SM be taking away my shine mentally, and that's hard to push back when I'm my biggest challenger. No more SM for me anymore. I'm done.
She’s properly reparenting herself and letting us participate via witnessing and creating the content in a digestible way for us to participate also if the shoe fits. #GeniusGirlie 💡 This is the way to do it and every spoiled girlie here has needed this for so long!! Aren’t we grateful?! ❤❤❤
Walked into a very *influencer-esque* event with my high vibe-wise woman-healer-naturalist persona and attracted a decent amount of people because I made THEM feel like they were working on themselves spiritually from simply being in my presence. I landed a lunch with a contact I’ve been wanting for a long time because of this!
Notes: - Entertain people when you socially interact with people - Talk about non mundane things with new people - first be confident with yourself and act as if you have your dream life - play into their fantasies by acting delulu - act into it and pretend until you are - Play into what people think of you - don’t get mad at people be self assured and confident - Have amazing self worth - Avoid people who are kinda negative but okay with them -
People like you make me comfortable with the idea of princess treatment and self care because the moment I started caring for myself and drawing boundaries I had people I had done so much for to the point that I couldve bled myself dry for them as I was a hardcore people pleaser come to me and say "I should learn how to not be rude" and that "I put 1 year long friendships down the drain" and so much more. But then I started watching your videos and thewwizardliz's videos which literally HEALED me, I have a long way to go, but I feel optimistic. So yeah I am so grateful for you guys!
One way I've learned to control my social circle is by developing a sense of humor. People love to laugh, and if you make them laugh, they remember that you did that for them. I use humor to attract AND repel people; dropping a witty non-sequiter and changing the topic is a great way to end conversations you don't want to participate in without coming across as rude. I can be direct and blunt if I have to, but I prefer to avoid getting in situations that require that response to begin with. Humor is great for self-confidence as well, which is another great tool for social management, like you said. Thanks for another great lesson, bestie ✨️
@itsfeefee good question. My best advice is to engage with humorous content and good quality comedy. What I've learned from stand-up comedy is to be ready to drop an unexpected truth. I'll give a recent example. A man invited me out to dinner, we chatted, and he started throwing these really cringe comments my way about how attractive I was. I dropped a line I heard a long time ago on a Brit-com about me being "built to last," and he nearly fell out of his chair laughing. That gave me the opportunity to change the subject and direct the conversation away from where it was going. That's how I use humor to establish boundaries in conversation. I do it at work when I want to avoid giving away certain personal information my coworkers aren't entitled to; I do it with my family when the conversation heads into topics I know will lead to conflict; I even do it with my significant other when a disagreement is getting too intense and we need to take a break. I'm not great at it, but I'm getting better. I've been working on it since I was 10, when I realized I needed another tool besides my fists to get myself out of situations and conversations I didn't want to be in. TL;DR: become a student of comedy. I highly recommend stand-up because the reactions from the audience are live, in person, and cannot be faked. My personal favorite is Gabriel Iglesias. Hope this helps.
Hello there and thank you so much for this comment ! I had a question for you and just now saw that someone else asked one before and you provided very useful insight. It would be lovely if you could answer mine as well, thank you ! Mine would be, how do you keep it up, how do you keep your spirits up to keep being funny in public ? - When many people around you don't feel like laughing anymore and have got grim because of the circumstances (pandemic, hustle, adulting). My context is that I used to be the class clown in primary and secondary school. I did not have an easy childhood, it included emotional ab* from a family member and bullying from classmates, still, I got over my shyness and probably protected myself too, by being funny. Jim Carrey was my favourite and I was pulling faces all the time. I also used and keep using my imagination, as the video very well states. At one time, a female friend, actually a bit jealous that we were sharing the funny person spotlight, told me that it's not feminine to be like that etc (there is a bit of truth to it, you will not be respected if you are just the clown and have no spine).. and I listened to her. (Btw, she went on to be a hobbyist actress and I am happy for her, she has talent and can pull it off). But, even though I started being more serious then, I haven't lost my sense of humour then and have made plenty of people laugh, sometimes even to help myself feel safe, including at some of my jobs. At my former workplace, I found the sympathy of some ex-envious older female colleagues after the company party - They found me funny and started smiling when they thought of me. But !.. Over the last few years, because of worries with hustle and adulting, many people's parents getting older, the pandemic, people getting ill/dying, mental health decrease because of less interaction.. The dispositions of the people around me got quite grim and they are not open to joking anymore, so for now, the almost only one person that I repeatedly laugh with is my father.. Compared to plenty of people before. Sometimes also with my sister, she too has a sense of humour. I do know that people in my side of Europe (Balkans) are frowny because of finances (but not only!), a friend who moved to Germany said she immediately sees the shift on the people's faces when she visits home. I, for one, recently got the opportunity to meet a Brit and envy their joy of life and creativity at making jokes tbh - Probably a good idea is to keep watching British humour to keep my mood up. At my core, I will still be that person who used to gather funny work screenshots in my former project for when I had a rainy day. And I am still that person who made some girls belly laugh with a fling story, Sex and the City style, this year. It's just that I don't feel safe/comfortable to be as bubbly as before.. I probably need an outlet, maybe stand-up comedy, as you mentioned.. I guess. Thank you in advance for taking the time !
P.S. I just now saw you mentioning Gabriel Iglesias, we might have even more in common than I thought, Gabriel is my favourite and that is the brand of humour that I like and use. Still, in my country, there is a lot of hype about roasts and borderline rude attitude and I don't like it at all. The stingy humour. While some do deserve the roast, I don't find it particularly funny and try to keep a light tone. It's probably also the feminine energy shining through
This is great. Part of this reinforces a fantastic book I read called The Art of Showing Up. In it, the author explains that you have to find "your people." You can't just be friends with anyone - you gotta have those shared values and you found "your people" when you celebrate each other's presence. When I learned this, it changed my outlook on friendships completely.
Also BE CAREFUL about magnetism. As a young person I found myself with a lot of magnetism and not much self worth or discernment and oh boy… do I wish I could go back in time and protect my younger self 😢 discernment and self value is so important to work on when you’re young if your parents didn’t instill it in you as a child.
hey girly, can you expand on this. I'm highly magnetic, I seem to attract people naturally but I have low self-esteem and once people find this out I feel like they get repulsed because the idea of me in their mind is shattered. how do I build my self-worth? speak to me as if you are speaking to your younger self, please. thank you.
I have been bingeing on your content for the last week. I am autistic and I was severely traumatized as a child by a bad man and an autistic mother who invited him into my life. I learned none of the principles that you are teaching because I lacked paternal care, provision and protection in my life. I am almost 40 years old, and countless relationships later, having been drained of my vitality, resources and will at times, I have finally found someone who has managed to explain these principles, in a pragmatic, logical and cogent manner that I can fully grasp and understand. I can feel the transformation taking place within me as a result of this shift and I have been having crazy dreams about it. Thank you so much for the work you are doing, I cannot express my gratitude to you enough. I feel like it still isn't too late to turn things around for myself because thankfully I have taken great care of my body and appearance despite the struggle I have been through and I'm smart as a whip, just have not been able to use discernment in the past. Everything changes NOW.
Omg it has taken me 40+ years to realize that I was dimming my own light to accommodate these people who were bothered by my confidence! You’ve explained it so well! 🙏💙
Another thing that i advise people to say to themselves is "i bring a sense of peace to anyone in my vicinity." Or "Why do i bring comfortable /relaxation to everyone in my vicinity?" ( Why affirmations are powerful). It minimizes the amount of negativity you get around you and adds to the magnetism a HUGE amount. And if you feel like you *need* people to be jealous of you in order to feel confident...more inner adjustment/confidence is needed.
This is SO TRUE!!! Right when I clicked on this video my boyfriend texted me "you make me feel so special." and that he knows we'll last forever. Right from the beginning he told me that he feels so amazing when he's with me and that he's obsessed with me. I think it not only makes people obsessed with you but it also makes them more likely to be emotionally vulnerable with you, and quicker!
People always emotionally vulnerable with me and I don’t always like it to be honest. I’ve dated guys who act like I’m some Mother Teresa sent to save them. Actually crying because they’re so happy I’m in their life.
Yes to everything you said! What really resonated was when you said to go where you are cherished. I’m naturally really bubbly and friendly and I love myself and some jobs I went to hated that and tried to dim my light but I would quit there, go where people appreciated my self worth, and I thrived there. Makes the biggest difference. Go where you’re celebrated not tolerated ✌️ Also you are glowing, your hair is gorgeous and I love that lipstick on you. Great presentation per usual, have a blessed day Elle 💖
this reminds me of a thing I learned in my entrepreneurship classes: you want to position and market yourself so that your product/service is ranked #1 to a strong, if small, group of people. Being rank #1000 to millions of people isn't good enough to keep your business afloat
"For the longest time I kept myself in places where a lot of people did not love my presence". Girl, I already liked you before you said this, now I recognize your story. I laughed with you on the "main character energy" thing because I recognize what it means for me too and how annoying it is to some and amusing to others, my people. You rock, you just confirmed I am not crazy for running away from so many low self worth people; girl, I raaaan so fast, I took a break to watch YT and here you are. God bless you! Subscribed. 🎀
The root of how to be magnetic, is have higher self worth. To do that you need to work on your past traumas, attachment styles, and forgive. When you don’t forgive you hold a lot of bitterness and anger in your energy which is not cute. Become less codependent on others opinions. Work on people pleasing, and have a higher tolerance for rejection, so you’re not controlled by others opinions. Work on your boundaries, and never be a door mat again. Know how to listen, and have more emotional control. Know how to read energy, and always be strong enough to walk away when someone's taking you for granted or treating you poorly. Become aware of your weaknesses, and when you’re saying something just to inflate your ego. Being mysterious is just being quiet, confident. These are all key things to becoming more alluring, and elegant. I spent years studying how to be more magnetic / seductive and it truly worked! People would call me glowy, and angelic, and I loved it. It really fed me. Then I found Jesus Christ, and realized I was obsessed with being magnetic to people, rather than being magnetic to God. AKA, living to please people, rather than living to please God. Sure it might get you in the door to some cool places, but trust me, the things you get with seduction, or appealing to peoples fantasies, don’t feel as good as the things you get genuinely -- and you don’t want a man purely based off seduction. I think you already know that. Anyway- When we start trying to be the queen of magnetism and seduction, we’re no longer walking in Gods authority, because It’s a level of witchcraft, and manipulation. If any of ya’ll love God or know Jesus, start reading the Bible more, and work on your holy girl vibe. It's more pure, light innocent, and joyful. The second you get too deep into trying to please people, it grieves the Holy Spirit. God bless all of you guys, wishing you all the best on your self love / healing journey.
Get picked? You're funny. To be honest, I've met a few wonderful men, and I've yet to pick any of them lol. Learn how to say no, until it's your best yes girlies @@namedrop721 Also, confused what you meant by God and shining his shoes 😂?? Huh? I'm just a Christian it's not that deep.
This video made me realize that I easily attract people because I’m happy, positive & listen well but I also have no problem with bringing up tough issues, which sometimes makes them distant. So when you said “people don’t like when their reality is questioned”, you put it into words for me. It’s sucks to feel like I can’t be my full self with everyone but that actually may help in more networking relationships.
Everything described in this video just meant you got to feel comfortable in solitude life and not get in a hurry to get out of solitude life. Even for networking, they want to also get an impression that you can take out of yourself and not seeking for attention. Whether you make friends or you networking, you will have a responsibility to impress them. What if you got them to network with you and then you get an interview? Your next step is impress them with elevator pitch. The vibe you give needs to tell them you bring value instead of you being desperate wanting to get out of solitude life.
Omg bestie, I always joke that I have ‘how to win friends and influence people’ basically on ‘speed dial order’ at amazon. I have gifted that book so many times. Everytime one of my friends is wining about people not acting in the way they want and making life unnecessary hard for themselves (aka getting mad) I force them to read that book. Works wonders every time 😌
I used to be in a rowing team at varsity where for some reason a lot of the girls disliked me and said mean things to me, even though I was always trying to be friendly and do my best (the rowing team did have a bit of cattiness, and I was a novice). I thought there must be something wrong with me and it still hurts to remember the times I felt like an outcast. You've just made me realise that maybe I wasn't doing anything wrong and am not 'bad' after all, and these people just weren't my tribe.
"Go where you are the IT GIRL" so IMMA just travel the whole world?? Cuz there's not a single place where I'm not perceived as the it girl 💗💋💋 I love u girl
1. Don't focus on being liked by everyone, focus on attracting the right people. Being magnetic isn't about universal popularity, it's about attracting the people and opportunities you want in life. Example: Imagine your dream job. You wouldn't want just anyone to hire you, you'd want the company that aligns with your skills and values. 2. Make people feel good about themselves. People are naturally drawn to those who make them feel good. Example: When someone compliments your outfit or makes you laugh during a conversation, you likely feel more drawn to them. 3. Know what you want and tailor your message accordingly. Be clear on your goals and the kind of people you want to attract. Then, position yourself and your message to resonate with them. Example: If you want to attract a business partner, highlight your professional skills and experience. 4. Be entertaining and create a positive social experience. Social interactions are opportunities to entertain and connect with others. People enjoy being around those who make them feel good. Example: Share interesting stories, ask engaging questions, and be an active listener. 5. Be your most authentic self with unshakably high self-worth. Confidence and self-belief are attractive. People who are comfortable in their own skin tend to repel negativity. Example: Focus on your strengths and positive qualities. Don't let insecurities hold you back from putting yourself out there. 6. Market yourself to the right audience. Just like the Stanley Cup changed its marketing strategy to target a new audience, you might need to adjust your approach. Example: If you feel undervalued in your current social circle, consider connecting with people who share your interests and values. Overall: By knowing your value and focusing on attracting the right kind of people, you can create a more positive and fulfilling life.
Every line is a gold my dear. I have always thought exactly this but never had the words to explain it the way you did. You are helping so many young women! Thank you for your work
Ok the the synchronicity is actually hilarious now. I just learned about the Stanley cup for the first time in my life yesterday (there was a dupe on Temu for cheaper), people were raving about it but I didn't understand why🤷🏻♀️. And today you literally used the Stanley cup as a metaphor LOL. I'm going to get one now just to remind myself to be in the right crowd 😂✨✨
Honestly sister... you spoke facts. ♥ My fave was the idea that if your confidence ruffles people's feathers, then you're around the wrong people. Ahhh love this sm
Always ruffled feathers just being myself and sweet 😂 I laugh nods instead of dimming my light like I use to. Lately Ive definitely been repelling people I don’t want they’re literally disappearing. Amen to this video!
this is so true, I think that's why I got bullied a lot, I was too shy and was used to acting "weak" so people could help me and take care of me, but when i left my home town, i only attracted ppl who gets advantage of me, and it was the worth 4 months of my life....
Omg I've been seriously transitioning and learning that I need to stop being so nice because I've taken the bs from others to the point I've risked my health and that should not be a thing, so now it's me who comes first.
After hearing how people get ruffled as soon as you step in I knew I had to subscribe. Soon after you mentioned the micro expression thing I felt my whole skeleton vibrate. Weird shit, but also good stuff you are very advanced spiritually. I send you much love ❤️
Thank you for the time, thoughtfulness and energy you put into this video. This is so valuable and much needed. Every woman needs to hear this!🥰😀❣ I love your wisdom, insight, aura and high self esteem. You are the woman you think you are sis!🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹
Amazing content in this video! I rarely suggest anything in comments, but the book women’s magic truths on borlest is a game-changer. It provides deep knowledge on wealth and self-care that can really make a difference. Take care, everyone
I LOVE this video! You hit the nail on the head and you’ve given me a great exercise to do for my rebrand (hit my 30s now I want to rebrand and have different goals than my teens and 20s). As someone who also has main character energy and can read micro-expressions, I know EXACTLY what you mean. HATERS, they are everywhere and they seethe when they see someone thriving. You are 100% right and if people get mad, that’s their problem. Some people really are just so insecure they get jealous and try to sabotage, this is why I really like how you preach attracting the right people and repelling the wrong people. Keep doing you, boo. ❤
Excellent video! I am obsessed with this concept that making people like us is more about making them feel good. I am not a natural at this and for so long I have blamed/devalued myself when things didn’t go how I wanted, and focused more on me rather than others. Could you please breakdown some other top influential “fantasy” women? E.g., Bella Hadid, Hailey Bieber, the Kardashians, playboy bunnies (for us 2000’s eras kids) Thank you!!
I'm applying to grad school right now, but I got my bachelor's 10 years ago and have been self employed for quite awhile. So I knew that recommendation letters would be a challenge. What did I do? I signed up for some community college classes. Then, when I decided which prof I wanted a letter from, I joined the club she's advisor to, so I could get more facetime with her. I used every class and club meeting to make a good impression, always turned my homework in early, and aced every test. Not only am I going to be able to show a recent transcript to demonstrate that a.) I can still succeed at school and b.) I'm serious about this new path, but that prof PROACTIVELY OFFERED to write me a letter before I even had the chance to ask. Positioning, baby. Positioning. (I have also used this method to get boyfriends in the past lol)
But letters of recommendations is not required to get boyfriends when you could of make a good impression at your own terms. Getting a boyfriend also should not be about how well you are educated or how much degrees you need. That is only for the job market and possibly getting yourself into a master's degree programs. Job markets and getting into a master's degree program requires a professional to put in a good word for you but if you were to get a boyfriend, you are supposed to impress him at your own terms. Documents to submit is not required when it comes to getting a boyfriend.
Honestly, I was about to skip cos I thought this was another "you'll never be like them because you don't have their money and editing apps so don't even bother" (which I find anything but empowering) but was proved wrong and in the best way possible. A truly positive video that lifts people! ❤ new sub
Thanks Bestie! You literally light up my bulb. I had an Aha moment. Been confused about why I encountered those kinds of people who would attack me when they don't get their way. Yes, I did not care so I called them out. What you said was spot on! Literally means that they have lower self worth/esteem! And all these years those women would give me jealous looks or not even want to look at me while talking.... Puzzle solved!!!! I have higher self esteem and self worth than them!!! Why am I surprised tho 🤣 You are definitely a lot more than you think you are capable of!!!! LETS RISE ☀️ Find our lid 😉
Love this video! You give such good lessons and actual practical advice. I realized Ive been attracting low value men because of how Ive been marketing myself on my dating app. So changed my profile writing it with wanting to attract a high value man in mind ❤
how about just be yourself, and learn to be comfortable with that and know that some people will just be bitter if we are happy but to just spend time with good hearted people who actually truly value the real us even with our fragilities be you folks.. do the things YOU want.. don't get stuck in the thing of trying to be what other people want you to be, if you do that you'll never be truly happy.. build the life YOU want, being you.. x
just found you …. finally i found the best You Tube person- YOU only difference is i’m a lotttttt older but this is the message i needed to hear i want to be the It ; marketable ; i am worth HIGH WORTH ❤ THANK YOU
Finally!! Someone who puts into words what I have been noticing lately. Idk where you have been all my 20s but you’re here now and I appreciate it sooo much!!!!🎉
I learned from my own mistakes😁 You are right. It s important to take yourself of the bad market. Because it just holds you back and lowers your confindece. More magnetic you are, more people want to hold you in an old state🌷